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(Patch)   Mom buys five frozen pizzas, learns they contain trans fats, sues California Pizza Kitchen for $5 million   (patch.com) divider line 27
    More: Stupid, California Pizza Kitchen, California, mom, pizzas, convenience foods, City News Service, nestle, made in china  
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14948 clicks; posted to Main » on 31 Jan 2013 at 12:54 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-01-31 12:38:15 PM
6 votes:
I notice that these pizzas seem to contain gluten.

What kind of monster feeds glutenated food to their CHILDREN??? Does she want her kids to catch autism???
2013-01-31 01:10:14 PM
2 votes:
I am betting she is overweight, wears tank-tops & stretch pants, has overweight dirty kids, and has that, you know, that...that...smell to her. I know this type. I am always stuck behind them at the check out counter.
2013-01-31 01:04:25 PM
2 votes:

I_Am_Weasel: Oh.  I almost forgot.


Hooootttt Poccckkkeeetttt.


I just read that aloud in Jim Gaffigan's voice, and now my coworkers are looking at me funny.
2013-01-31 01:00:54 PM
2 votes:

Jument: But when she learned they contained trans fat-an ingredient linked to heart disease, diabetes and cancer-she felt as if she were sold poison.

Right or wrong, I just want to punch her in the face after reading this bit. It's a goddamn frozen pizza. It's unhealthy, trans fat or no, you stupid farking cow.



Thank God Twinkies are off the market...she would have a heart attack if she read the ingredients.
2013-01-31 01:00:01 PM
2 votes:
So by her reasoning, when she fed this to her children, she committed an act of child endangerment! When will she be arrested?
2013-01-31 12:41:33 PM
2 votes:
Oh.  I almost forgot.


Hooootttt Poccckkkeeetttt.
2013-01-31 12:38:50 PM
2 votes:
I know when seeking out healthy food I always think "frozen pizza."
2013-01-31 12:16:17 PM
2 votes:
Weston said the suit seeks all monies Nestle has ever made from frozenpizzas.

Good luck with that.
2013-01-31 03:54:33 PM
1 votes:

Smgth: StrikitRich: Smgth: All you people who are saying this woman should be punched (either in the face or...lower), shoud be ashamed!

This woman should NOT be punched!

She should be launched into the G-D D-MN SUN! This brainless subspecies of troglodyte coontwaffle should be tarred and feathered. It's people like this who make this country so awful. Stupid BS victim mentality combined with the great American past time of trying to acquire something for nothing.

/Wish she had eaten several dozen pizzas covered in ACTUAL poison.

Launched into the Sun only after the lawyer that enabled her idiocy is sent there first.

Ooooh, good point! We got so carried away getting angry at this thundercoont we forgot her equally guilty accomplice. We could use him as a solid state rocket booster for her lift off.

But we've decided that a sun launch is too good for her. And it's CERTAINLY too good for the lawyer. We're going to have to come up with something equally as arcane as the punishment we've decided on for her, and since lawyers deserve a special kind of hell, it'll have to be good.

/My first instinct is 'bullet ants meet genitalia'.
//For a start...



tall, thin sapling
thin wet leather cord
rope
candle/cigar

Stakly lawyer out in open sunny area.  Bend sapling, tie with rope.  Attach wet leather cord tightly to lawyer genitalia, then sapling, keeping cord taut.  Light candle and place beneath rope.  Alternatively, light cigar and place against rope.

Set up lawn chair, get cold beer from cooler, relax.

Kick jar of bullet ants over several times just to keep them active while you wait....
2013-01-31 02:52:46 PM
1 votes:
chzragecomics.files.wordpress.com
2013-01-31 02:16:05 PM
1 votes:
I visited the politics tab, and I feel like my mind was poisoned. Drew didn't put up any warnings about the excessive amounts of derp found in his product. Expect a lawsuit.

//I think I have a better case than the woman in the article
2013-01-31 02:05:11 PM
1 votes:

Smgth: CheekyMonkey: Satan's Bunny Slippers: Can we skeet shoot at her upon launch?  I don't care where we launch her, sun or ocean, I'd just like a shot!!!

Just as long as you don't use one of those scary, black assault rifles...

I think we'll have to skeet shoot with shotguns. Only because I think we should fill them with rock salt. I don't want some sharp shooter ending this fun in the first few seconds.

/Could we fill shotguns with some kind of crystallized trans-fat? Ironic punishments are the funniest kind.


Paint balls hurt, right?  We could just custom-order a few cases of Crisco-filled paint balls...
2013-01-31 02:01:11 PM
1 votes:
Someone please take this woman's children away and put them in foster care, sterilize her, and then punch her in the face.
2013-01-31 01:59:30 PM
1 votes:

Smgth: CheekyMonkey: Satan's Bunny Slippers: Can we skeet shoot at her upon launch?  I don't care where we launch her, sun or ocean, I'd just like a shot!!!

Just as long as you don't use one of those scary, black assault rifles...

I think we'll have to skeet shoot with shotguns. Only because I think we should fill them with rock salt. I don't want some sharp shooter ending this fun in the first few seconds.

/Could we fill shotguns with some kind of crystallized trans-fat? Ironic punishments are the funniest kind.


I can completely support crystallized trans-fat filled shells!  And due to drag coefficient slowing her down I'll may even get good shot!

/not good at skeet
//not at all........
2013-01-31 01:55:48 PM
1 votes:

CheekyMonkey: Satan's Bunny Slippers: Can we skeet shoot at her upon launch?  I don't care where we launch her, sun or ocean, I'd just like a shot!!!

Just as long as you don't use one of those scary, black assault rifles...


I think we'll have to skeet shoot with shotguns. Only because I think we should fill them with rock salt. I don't want some sharp shooter ending this fun in the first few seconds.

/Could we fill shotguns with some kind of crystallized trans-fat? Ironic punishments are the funniest kind.
2013-01-31 01:43:06 PM
1 votes:
I'm to stupid to read a label.
Give me money.
2013-01-31 01:40:48 PM
1 votes:
SHOOT THE LAWYERS! MORE SKIN ON HBO! L.H. PUTTGRASS SIGNING OFF AND HEADING FOR THE TUB!!
2013-01-31 01:38:49 PM
1 votes:
I'm going to sue the Philly Pizza Company for not having hot tea.
2013-01-31 01:36:52 PM
1 votes:

Dog Welder: This just in:  packaged frozen foods are not healthy for you.

If you want "healthy" pizza, make it from scratch.  It's really not difficult to make a decent pizza dough.  It might take a little more time, but it's worth it.


Just make sure you use Crisco in the dough.  It really adds some flavor.
2013-01-31 01:22:34 PM
1 votes:

Smgth: All you people who are saying this woman should be punched (either in the face or...lower), shoud be ashamed!

This woman should NOT be punched!

She should be launched into the G-D D-MN SUN! This brainless subspecies of troglodyte coontwaffle should be tarred and feathered. It's people like this who make this country so awful. Stupid BS victim mentality combined with the great American past time of trying to acquire something for nothing.

/Wish she had eaten several dozen pizzas covered in ACTUAL poison.


Launching her into the sun would cost quite a bit of money.  Would you settle for catapulting her into the Pacific Ocean, covered with chum?

/after I get to punch her in the clitoris, of course
2013-01-31 01:19:41 PM
1 votes:

Dafodude: To be fair, subby, this is a class-action suit, so it's not like she's expecting to get 5 million to herself.  And if this stupid-ass suit actually does win the lawyers will take half before the any other claimants get their check for five dollars and sixty-two cents.

Anyway, this article makes it seem like a slam dunk at first saying PHVO is "banned worldwide".  Poor choice of words considering that later in the article it specifically states that only a few jurisdictions in the U.S. have banned it, and only in restaurants. 

Even the complaint itself says "banned in many parts of the world."  That does NOT mean "banned worldwide."

Nestle is right to say that they're in compliance with regulations.  I didn't feel like reading the entire 23 page complaint, but I'm guessing this case doesn't have much merit at all, and that it's just enough worth the risk for the lawyers to give it a shot. They could probably give less than two shiats about Katie Simpson and her Snowflakes, et al.


No, just give them a free pizza as the settlement. For maximum trolling.
2013-01-31 01:18:12 PM
1 votes:
Never has the term "biatch slap" crossed my mind so many times in one article.
2013-01-31 01:17:44 PM
1 votes:
If frozen pizzas were even remotely poisonous I would not have survived my early twenties.
2013-01-31 12:59:37 PM
1 votes:
Never mind the trans fat, she should have sued them for tasting so disgusting.
2013-01-31 12:34:30 PM
1 votes:
Whatever the outcome, the Sicilian style California Pizza must remain available to consumers.
2013-01-31 12:10:01 PM
1 votes:
this is why we can't have nice things.
2013-01-31 11:59:40 AM
1 votes:
But that pizza is frivolicious
 
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