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(TC Palm)   You've got ask where it all went downhill the night you find yourself going to a trailer to have sex with the woman who lives there, but balking when you see her husband pointing a shotgun at another customer running from the residence   (tcpalm.com) divider line 29
    More: Florida, Jensen Beach, Daniel Diodato, shotguns, Treasure Coast  
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8863 clicks; posted to Main » on 30 Jan 2013 at 7:29 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



29 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-01-30 07:27:38 AM
Better than I expected.

florida.arrests.org
 
2013-01-30 07:45:00 AM
FTA: ...claiming the law that a person has no duty to retreat and meet force with force...

www.joygag.com

I know what this is supposed to say, but that isn't what it actually says.
 
2013-01-30 07:45:39 AM
The things people go through and put up with, just to have sex, just totally amaze me.
 
2013-01-30 07:46:37 AM
That sh$ts not gonna be for sale for a long time.
 
2013-01-30 07:51:27 AM
Maybe the guy didn't satisfy the Missus and the Mister was there to mete out discipline and punishments.
 
2013-01-30 08:03:16 AM

Sybarite: Better than I expected.

[florida.arrests.org image 232x240]


http://florida.arrests.org/Arrests/Sarah_Diodato_5782359/

That's a hard 22 all the same.
 
2013-01-30 08:04:54 AM
Got a moment? Step in to the office, please.
"You mean the bedroom? Okay. What's up?"
Well, when we decided to start this enterprise, we agreed that I would be doing the sex with the strangers for money and you would handle, tech support and security. We need to talk about how you handle those duties.
"Is it the computer. It's an eMachine. They only last so long..."
No. Your tech support skills are great. If I have to e-mail a John to arrange a date or go on Craigslist, the computer does its job. I really can't knock the tech support around here. I've been looking over the metrics and I'm not getting the repeat business that I should. I am way below average on returns and that is really going to hurt the short-term and the long term viability of the business.
"Well maybe you should do those exercises. Tighten things up."
No. We are far from the hot dog down the hallway here. My customers leave this office satisfied and I am sure they are considering a future return visit - until you chase them with a shotgun.
"So you're blaming me or the shotgun?"
Both. But mostly you.
"I should get rid of the shotgun?"
For the long term and short term viability of this business, yes. We are trying to generate customers here. And this business relies on customers who come back more than once. They don't do that if you if you chase them off with a shotgun.
"I had no idea. I thought it was part of the experience. Well, consider the shotgun gone."
Good. Now let us get back to the business of making money, shall we?
"Speaking of money. I'll need some. For a pitchfork."
Are you planning on chasing the customers off with a pitchfork?
"Uh, a little?"
No. Look. Let me handle everything except the tech support.
"Do I still get paid the same?"
Sure
"Awesome!"
 
2013-01-30 08:05:17 AM

HenryFnord: Sybarite: Better than I expected.

[florida.arrests.org image 232x240]

http://florida.arrests.org/Arrests/Sarah_Diodato_5782359/

That's a hard 22 all the same.


"CHARGE: TO OFFER TO COMMITT/ENGAGE IN PROSTITUTION/LEWDNESS/ASSIGNATION"

I bet she charges extra for that...
 
2013-01-30 08:06:32 AM
Not the first time she's had sex with a man other than her husband....

florida.arrests.org

t1.gstatic.com
/hot like incestuous sex in front of a shotgun!
 
2013-01-30 08:06:39 AM
Then you look at the tag, and you stop wondering
 
2013-01-30 08:11:41 AM
florida.arrests.org

i272.photobucket.com
 
2013-01-30 08:12:00 AM
I'm going to say his first mistake was a poor choice of bars.
 
2013-01-30 08:12:24 AM
The bell tolling at the end was not signifying the end of times. It was just some college kids pranking the cult.
 
2013-01-30 08:36:36 AM
"Dio dato" in Italian means "God-given". Make of that what you will.
 
2013-01-30 08:55:23 AM

JohnnyCanuck: The bell tolling at the end was not signifying the end of times. It was just some college kids pranking the cult.


Damn you! I came in to make a similar reference.

/Well played my friend, well played.
 
2013-01-30 09:02:04 AM
farm9.staticflickr.com
 
2013-01-30 09:03:16 AM

Pick: The things people go through and put up with, just to have sex, just totally amaze me.


Like marriage is much better.

I just knew this story would involve some Hicks.
 
2013-01-30 09:11:27 AM
What does "You've got ask..." mean?
 
2013-01-30 10:29:32 AM
The answer toi the headline's question is trailer. It all went pear shaped once the trailer became a factor.

/Also curious if turning the shotgun aspect into a roleplay scenario wouldn't bring in a few more clients.
 
2013-01-30 10:32:31 AM

Pick: The things people go through and put up with, just to have sex, just totally amaze me.


Hottest chick I ever sexed up took me out regularly, paid my cover, got me drunk and took me back to her place for some good wet fun. The shiat I put up with, indeed.

/nothing like a girl that does yoga 5 days a week
//I'll uh, be in my bunk.
 
2013-01-30 11:57:29 AM

HenryFnord: Sybarite: Better than I expected.

[florida.arrests.org image 232x240]

http://florida.arrests.org/Arrests/Sarah_Diodato_5782359/

That's a hard 22 all the same.


That's what an all protein diet and lack of sunshine will do to you.
 
2013-01-30 01:26:31 PM

Harry Freakstorm: Got a moment? Step in to the office, please.
"You mean the bedroom? Okay. What's up?"
Well, when we decided to start this enterprise, we agreed that I would be doing the sex with the strangers for money and you would handle, tech support and security. We need to talk about how you handle those duties.
"Is it the computer. It's an eMachine. They only last so long..."
No. Your tech support skills are great. If I have to e-mail a John to arrange a date or go on Craigslist, the computer does its job. I really can't knock the tech support around here. I've been looking over the metrics and I'm not getting the repeat business that I should. I am way below average on returns and that is really going to hurt the short-term and the long term viability of the business.
"Well maybe you should do those exercises. Tighten things up."
No. We are far from the hot dog down the hallway here. My customers leave this office satisfied and I am sure they are considering a future return visit - until you chase them with a shotgun.
"So you're blaming me or the shotgun?"
Both. But mostly you.
"I should get rid of the shotgun?"
For the long term and short term viability of this business, yes. We are trying to generate customers here. And this business relies on customers who come back more than once. They don't do that if you if you chase them off with a shotgun.
"I had no idea. I thought it was part of the experience. Well, consider the shotgun gone."
Good. Now let us get back to the business of making money, shall we?
"Speaking of money. I'll need some. For a pitchfork."
Are you planning on chasing the customers off with a pitchfork?
"Uh, a little?"
No. Look. Let me handle everything except the tech support.
"Do I still get paid the same?"
Sure
"Awesome!"


Awesome indeed.
 
2013-01-30 01:29:23 PM

Lets talk frankly about internal cleanliness: Pick: The things people go through and put up with, just to have sex, just totally amaze me.

Hottest chick I ever sexed up took me out regularly, paid my cover, got me drunk and took me back to her place for some good wet fun. The shiat I put up with, indeed.

/nothing like a girl that does yoga 5 days a week
//I'll uh, be in my bunk.


Possibly true. Best of luck trying to repeat that. It's uncommon.
 
2013-01-30 01:30:45 PM

Lets talk frankly about internal cleanliness: Pick: The things people go through and put up with, just to have sex, just totally amaze me.

Hottest chick I ever sexed up took me out regularly, paid my cover, got me drunk and took me back to her place for some good wet fun. The shiat I put up with, indeed.

/nothing like a girl that does yoga 5 days a week
//I'll uh, be in my bunk.


Moms don't count.
 
2013-01-30 01:56:42 PM

Lets talk frankly about internal cleanliness: Pick: The things people go through and put up with, just to have sex, just totally amaze me.

Hottest chick I ever sexed up took me out regularly, paid my cover, got me drunk and took me back to her place for some good wet fun. The shiat I put up with, indeed.

/nothing like a girl that does yoga 5 days a week
//I'll uh, be in my bunk.


Let me guess:

serendip.brynmawr.edu
 
2013-01-30 03:40:39 PM

Pangea: Lets talk frankly about internal cleanliness: Pick: The things people go through and put up with, just to have sex, just totally amaze me.

Hottest chick I ever sexed up took me out regularly, paid my cover, got me drunk and took me back to her place for some good wet fun. The shiat I put up with, indeed.

/nothing like a girl that does yoga 5 days a week
//I'll uh, be in my bunk.

Possibly true. Best of luck trying to repeat that. It's uncommon.


I assume any man with a moderate level of sexual experience gets at least one crazy/good in bed type for the purpose of establishing credible metrics. Dads, tell your sons not to marry their first piece.
/Any man she moves onto has an excellent shot at performing better than a virgin, so the next guy looks great and you did him a solid.
//Your son needs a basis of comparison to make sure the cray cray outside of sex is justified by the crazy good sex.
///Slash! Ahahhhh! He'll save every one of us!
 
2013-01-30 10:20:50 PM

Harry Freakstorm: Got a moment? Step in to the office, please.
"You mean the bedroom? Okay. What's up?"
Well, when we decided to start this enterprise, we agreed that I would be doing the sex with the strangers for money and you would handle, tech support and security. We need to talk about how you handle those duties.
"Is it the computer. It's an eMachine. They only last so long..."
No. Your tech support skills are great. If I have to e-mail a John to arrange a date or go on Craigslist, the computer does its job. I really can't knock the tech support around here. I've been looking over the metrics and I'm not getting the repeat business that I should. I am way below average on returns and that is really going to hurt the short-term and the long term viability of the business.
"Well maybe you should do those exercises. Tighten things up."
No. We are far from the hot dog down the hallway here. My customers leave this office satisfied and I am sure they are considering a future return visit - until you chase them with a shotgun.
"So you're blaming me or the shotgun?"
Both. But mostly you.
"I should get rid of the shotgun?"
For the long term and short term viability of this business, yes. We are trying to generate customers here. And this business relies on customers who come back more than once. They don't do that if you if you chase them off with a shotgun.
"I had no idea. I thought it was part of the experience. Well, consider the shotgun gone."
Good. Now let us get back to the business of making money, shall we?
"Speaking of money. I'll need some. For a pitchfork."
Are you planning on chasing the customers off with a pitchfork?
"Uh, a little?"
No. Look. Let me handle everything except the tech support.
"Do I still get paid the same?"
Sure
"Awesome!"


If I were a network exec, I'd have just three words for you. Best. Sitcom. Ever.
 
2013-01-30 11:08:29 PM

calbert: [farm9.staticflickr.com image 594x305]


Is that from "Porky's?"  That's the first thing I thought of after reading the headline.
 
2013-01-30 11:13:30 PM

bmfderek: calbert: [farm9.staticflickr.com image 594x305]

Is that from "Porky's?"  That's the first thing I thought of after reading the headline.


yep. best screen grab I could make.

first thing I thought of too.

*internet fist-bump*
 
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