FARK.com: (7563230) 22 ways to live longer...including having lots of really good sex, and using Twitter

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		22 ways to live longer...including having lots of really good sex, and using Twitter (buzzfeed.com)		96
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10601 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Jan 2013 at 5:21 PM | Favorite | share:

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skinink		2013-01-29 05:24:19 PM

DRINK OVALTINE

RubberBabyBuggyBumpers		2013-01-29 05:26:11 PM

Having sex twice a week is "lots?"

HMS_Blinkin		2013-01-29 05:27:43 PM

RubberBabyBuggyBumpers: Having sex twice a week is "lots?"

This article must have been submitted by a TFer.

/not me
//seriously
///why are you looking at me like that?

Grapple		2013-01-29 05:28:47 PM

RubberBabyBuggyBumpers: Having sex twice a week is "lots?"

To some folks... yes.

Point02GPA		2013-01-29 05:29:06 PM

RubberBabyBuggyBumpers: Having sex twice a week is "lots?"

When your 68, having sex twice a week is just a memory.

Charlie Chingas		2013-01-29 05:29:44 PM

RubberBabyBuggyBumpers: Having sex twice a week is "lots?"

That's a lot of begging...

halB		2013-01-29 05:30:36 PM

My cat doesn't increase my lifespan? Lousy adorable freeloader.

reillan		2013-01-29 05:30:58 PM

RubberBabyBuggyBumpers: Having sex twice a week is "lots?"

For some of you, this will mean much less sex.

For me, much, much more.

great_tigers		2013-01-29 05:31:35 PM

A lot of nice round numbers and general statements. I am calling bs.

socodog		2013-01-29 05:32:23 PM

And you don't tug on Superman's cape
You don't spit into the wind
You don't pull the mask off that old Lone Ranger
And you don't mess around with Jim

pagstuff		2013-01-29 05:33:13 PM

Does dancing in amounts other than 3 times a week yield non-corresponding amounts of exercise?

/How does pedantry affect longevity?

jmayson		2013-01-29 05:33:19 PM

Point02GPA: RubberBabyBuggyBumpers: Having sex twice a week is "lots?"

When your 68, having sex twice a week is just a memory.

When my 68 does what?

Point02GPA		2013-01-29 05:35:09 PM

jmayson: Point02GPA: RubberBabyBuggyBumpers: Having sex twice a week is "lots?"

When your 68, having sex twice a week is just a memory.

When my 68 does what?

Nice catch...enjoy

The Stealth Hippopotamus		2013-01-29 05:35:52 PM

Sex is good cardio. I dont understand the Twitter

Tillmaster		2013-01-29 05:38:44 PM

Get a bloody dog? Hell no.

I'm 67, expecting to be 68 later this year (with any luck).

What's going to happen, Point02GPA? Is there something they didn't tell me? I'm frightened.

Agent Smiths Laugh		2013-01-29 05:41:13 PM

Live longer? No thanks. Been at it for too long already.

Point02GPA		2013-01-29 05:42:11 PM

Tillmaster: Get a bloody dog? Hell no.

I'm 67, expecting to be 68 later this year (with any luck).

What's going to happen, Point02GPA? Is there something they didn't tell me? I'm frightened.

First thing you're going to remember is that you already have a dog.

Stone Meadow		2013-01-29 05:43:17 PM

Point02GPA: jmayson: Point02GPA: RubberBabyBuggyBumpers: Having sex twice a week is "lots?"

When your 68, having sex twice a week is just a memory.

When my 68 does what?

Nice catch...enjoy

I'm 60ish and live by the old adage..."Once a king; always a king, but once a week's enough..." ;^)

/doing 17 of the 25 (if you count hanging out on Fark as Twittering...)

devilEther		2013-01-29 05:43:53 PM

RubberBabyBuggyBumpers: Having sex twice a week is "lots?"

How many dicks is that?

RubberBabyBuggyBumpers		2013-01-29 05:44:02 PM

Eating porridge didn't seem to help the Three Bears. Not sayin', just sayin'.

doglover		2013-01-29 05:46:41 PM

Can I sue people who say "No." for attempted murder then?

Fark Rye For Many Whores		2013-01-29 05:46:41 PM

Looking for http://twitter.com/DrewCurtis/ where he was drunk and spelled it twatter and then nuked the Pol tab. Anyone remember this?

NotARocketScientist		2013-01-29 05:49:22 PM

Don't divorce?
The twin with the divorce looked older.
Maybe that is because their marriage sucked and the stress of constantly fighting with someone you live with aged them.

Elroydb		2013-01-29 05:54:09 PM

Owning a cat will shorten your lifespan because they are constantly plotting to kill you. Or at least mine is

Stabone33		2013-01-29 05:54:59 PM

Can I not use teh Twitters and just have more secks?

Dr. Goldshnoz		2013-01-29 05:55:06 PM

That read like a guide to better consumerism.

Vangor		2013-01-29 05:56:32 PM

A 12-year-long study of coffee drinkers revealed that men and women who drink six cups of coffee a day reduce their risk of dying by 10% and 15%, respectively.

Except the folks able or needing to drink six cups of coffee a day tend to work inside in low stress but high boredom positions while living reasonably comfortably and having health care, because six cups of coffee is not a magic number to simply stave off mortality but is an indicator of a host of factors which contribute directly to longer life span. Will say the same goes for the majority of those where the overall lifestyle, including risk-taking behavior and such, is the cause of longer life and those behaviors. Easier to live longer when you're not uninsured, in manual labor, with a savings account, and time for additional exercise.

little big man		2013-01-29 05:59:22 PM

Who wrote the sloppy text for this? "...who drink six cups of coffee a day reduce their risk of dying...."

Luminaro		2013-01-29 06:03:35 PM

Six cups of coffee per day? How does your heart not burst out of your chest?

KStDrew		2013-01-29 06:08:15 PM

Point02GPA: RubberBabyBuggyBumpers: Having sex twice a week is "lots?"

When your 68, having sex twice a week is just a memory.

But at 69, things are different...

machodonkeywrestler		2013-01-29 06:12:09 PM

Twitter? Really?

ProfessorOhki		2013-01-29 06:16:10 PM

Vangor: A 12-year-long study of coffee drinkers revealed that men and women who drink six cups of coffee a day reduce their risk of dying by 10% and 15%, respectively.

Except the folks able or needing to drink six cups of coffee a day tend to work inside in low stress but high boredom positions while living reasonably comfortably and having health care, because six cups of coffee is not a magic number to simply stave off mortality but is an indicator of a host of factors which contribute directly to longer life span. Will say the same goes for the majority of those where the overall lifestyle, including risk-taking behavior and such, is the cause of longer life and those behaviors. Easier to live longer when you're not uninsured, in manual labor, with a savings account, and time for additional exercise.

Are you trying to say that drinking 60 cups a day won't make me immortal? Seriously, I wonder if it's a curve that peaks at 6 or if it's "6 or more." It'd be nice if there were some charts or something instead of a stylized clipart graphic of what a cup of coffee might look like; sort of a waste of page space.

KStDrew		2013-01-29 06:19:07 PM

So, drinking 80 to 120 cup of coffee a day makes you immortal. Also, I have 1.5 orgasms a week and sometimes I pull out. Am I gonna die?

/This study has been brought to you by the following:

Tweeter
Skype
National Retail Federation
Our wives

KStDrew		2013-01-29 06:20:19 PM

ProfessorOhki: Vangor: A 12-year-long study of coffee drinkers revealed that men and women who drink six cups of coffee a day reduce their risk of dying by 10% and 15%, respectively.

Except the folks able or needing to drink six cups of coffee a day tend to work inside in low stress but high boredom positions while living reasonably comfortably and having health care, because six cups of coffee is not a magic number to simply stave off mortality but is an indicator of a host of factors which contribute directly to longer life span. Will say the same goes for the majority of those where the overall lifestyle, including risk-taking behavior and such, is the cause of longer life and those behaviors. Easier to live longer when you're not uninsured, in manual labor, with a savings account, and time for additional exercise.

Are you trying to say that drinking 60 cups a day won't make me immortal? Seriously, I wonder if it's a curve that peaks at 6 or if it's "6 or more." It'd be nice if there were some charts or something instead of a stylized clipart graphic of what a cup of coffee might look like; sort of a waste of page space.

GMTA

fathersaid		2013-01-29 06:21:41 PM

RubberBabyBuggyBumpers: Having sex twice a week is "lots?"

uh-oh we got a badassss over here

RubberBabyBuggyBumpers		2013-01-29 06:23:07 PM

fathersaid: RubberBabyBuggyBumpers: Having sex twice a week is "lots?"

uh-oh we got a badassss over here

Oh no no no, I'm not sayin', I'm just sayin'.

Linux_Yes		2013-01-29 06:24:40 PM

skinink: DRINK OVALTINE

any friend of ovaltine is a friend of mine.

MayoSlather		2013-01-29 06:24:54 PM

Agent Smiths Laugh: Live longer? No thanks. Been at it for too long already.

That's where I'm at. Only in my late 30's and I'm ready to call it a day.

Linux_Yes		2013-01-29 06:26:02 PM

RubberBabyBuggyBumpers: Having sex twice a week is "lots?"

if you climax 23 times each session it is.

Smeggy Smurf		2013-01-29 06:26:04 PM

Don't divorce? Really? Staying with that psycho biatch would have killed me had I tried to do it for another year. Or I'd have killed her. Prison ass rape will age you faster than divorce.

i.r.id10t		2013-01-29 06:30:41 PM

RubberBabyBuggyBumpers: Having sex twice a week is "lots?"

If you are married, it is an almost unheard of amount.. especially if you have kids

valar_morghulis		2013-01-29 06:31:14 PM

Linux_Yes: RubberBabyBuggyBumpers: Having sex twice a week is "lots?"

if you climax 23 times each session it is.

That's a lot.

ProfessorOhki		2013-01-29 06:31:22 PM

Smeggy Smurf: Don't divorce? Really? Staying with that psycho biatch would have killed me had I tried to do it for another year. Or I'd have killed her. Prison ass rape will age you faster than divorce.

Depends on if it's twice a week.

Theonceovertwice		2013-01-29 06:32:13 PM

RubberBabyBuggyBumpers: Having sex twice a week is "lots?"

Considering I haven't had sex in 9 months, yes.

Ablejack		2013-01-29 06:34:33 PM

I think more important than having wives and sex, is having birthdays. There seems to be a direct correlation. The more birthdays you have, the longer you live.

SBWorks		2013-01-29 06:36:14 PM

including having lots of really good sex, and using Twitter

Preferably not simultaneously

ProfessorOhki		2013-01-29 06:38:44 PM

SBWorks: including having lots of really good sex, and using Twitter

Preferably not simultaneously

If-you-had-72-hours-in-your-pool-for-how-lo n g-it-would-take-Twitter-Vine-to-become-a-hardcore-porn-platform-please -step-forward-to-collect-your-sticky-prize

RubberBabyBuggyBumpers		2013-01-29 06:39:49 PM

Theonceovertwice: RubberBabyBuggyBumpers: Having sex twice a week is "lots?"

Considering I haven't had sex in 9 months, yes.

I hear ya. I, too, used to be married.

Gnu Mutant		2013-01-29 06:40:50 PM

I drink 6-7 XL turbo DD coffees a day.

/170

ColSanders		2013-01-29 06:43:20 PM

i.r.id10t: RubberBabyBuggyBumpers: Having sex twice a week is "lots?"

If you are married, it is an almost unheard of amount.. especially if you have kids

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