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(My Fox Orlando)   Would-be carjackers to their victim: "What's this third pedal for?"   (myfoxorlando.com) divider line 47
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17462 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Jan 2013 at 2:49 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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Archived thread
2013-01-29 03:22:50 PM  
14 votes:
I'm pretty sure that's the only reason my car wasn't stolen when I lived in a sketchy place one summer for one of my college internships. My neighbors went through two cars in one summer, and they weren't nice cars, either.

If anyone has time for a 'Cool Story, Sis' about stupid car mods, you can keep reading. If not, just scroll down to the next comment.

The smash-and-grab problem was so bad that I went to the junkyard and pulled the front off an old tape deck to shove in the console, then soldered some longer wires to the harness, ran them under the plastic cowling and actually managed to get the real head unit installed vertically in the center glovebox. You'd open the top, put in your CD or connect your MP3 player, and carry on, though I did have to cut some subtle vent holes and wire in a computer fan to keep the unit at a safe temperature in the summer and I actually used some metal straps and screws to really secure it in there so it couldn't just be yanked. Had to disassemble almost the entire middle of the interior to do it, but my time was worth nothing then and the radio had been a present from my Dad, so I really did not want it stolen.

I also used a Dremel to cut a cassette tape in half and glued it into the tape-deck-front so it looked like I was actually using it. Eventually I put the tape-deck-front onto hinges and used some Sugru and Krazy Glue to securely wedge a plastic box into the original radio's spot (it once contained frozen eclairs, but a good cleaning and some Krylon for Plastic made it work,) and so my car's wonderful radio security system consisted of the radio and the center glovebox being in opposite places. I also wired a little hidden switch into the ignition so even with the key, the car would only start if one knew exactly what switch to flip. Again, my time was worth nothing at this point, and the car wasn't worth much more, but I'd lose my job if I lost it and I had very little choice but to innovate.

After that was done, I'd just leave the car unlocked, since with an unlocked car, the chavs would search for items and then close it back up, whereas a locked car would get its' windows smashed. It was the guy I was dating at the time who came up with the best idea. Every week I would get a few dollars in ones as change, harvest some poison ivy with my gloves on and store the bills in a Ziploc bag of the oily leaves, then place them, again in gloves, into the dashboard glovebox by themselves.

For three weeks, the itchy-fied bills were, without fail, stolen, and I considered it a kind of $3-4 per week 'parking fee,' especially since the problem with the slumlord who owned the building leaving passive-aggressive notes about not having a lot permit stopped around that time. This guy was a real piece of work. Wouldn't sell me a parking permit because we only had a summer sublet and "those tags are expensive and your kind never return 'em!" (what kind, I always wondered, given that I was as white as he was,) wouldn't stop biatching about my not having one, and the one time he tried to have my car towed, I made a fake permit with Photoshop and the tow guy charged the slumlord for a false alarm. One day, though, my then-boyfriend put the bait bills in for me, not realizing that I typically removed the bills from the Ziploc of poison-ivy leaves before placing them in the car. He just threw in the whole bag, complete with three dollars and about three fistfuls of nicely shredded poison ivy leaves.

Funny thing, though; it was actually the teenage son of the slum lord who tried to smoke the leaves and wound up in the hospital. Apparently he had been tasked by his parent with going around to check for permit compliance, and along the way, this entitled little chav was the one robbing all the cars. So my $3-5 dollar investment and the 'shopped permit was apparently enough to keep a fifteen-year-old boy from ratting my poor little hoopty out to his loser dad. The kid went into the hospital the first week in August, and by the time they released him, we'd packed our stuff and fled into the night, never to darken the doors or drip oil on the parking lot again.

I always wonder how the kid explained himself, though. Considering the landlord refused to buy health insurance because it was a Commie scam and believed in paying cash for everything, two weeks in the hospital and a stint in intensive care probably had at least some disciplinary effect on that rotten kid.

And the moral of the story is, 'don't try to smoke baggies of leaves you find in 1987 Hondas that do not belong to you.'
2013-01-29 02:54:02 PM  
7 votes:

dahmers love zombie: I wonder if I could get a car outfitted with a 3-speed column shifter.  I could leave the keys in it all the time with zero worry.


Until the local Nursing Home escape discovers it.
2013-01-29 02:53:22 PM  
5 votes:
The automatic transmission was the first step in the downfall of western civilization.
2013-01-29 02:52:30 PM  
5 votes:
I wonder if I could get a car outfitted with a 3-speed column shifter.  I could leave the keys in it all the time with zero worry.
2013-01-29 03:10:50 PM  
4 votes:
"This is a high performance car compared to other cars, so if they had gotten it, they might have hurt themselves in it."

t.qkme.me
2013-01-29 03:03:35 PM  
4 votes:
Apparently, you're not a golfer.

smhttp.14409.nexcesscdn.net
2013-01-29 03:01:29 PM  
4 votes:

Wellon Dowd: maxximillian: does this story stink to anyone else? I think I'm going to call BS. Why did the owner try lifting prints on his own?

Because Florida.


"Stand Your Ground" gets all the press, but "Do Your Own Police Work" is actually a much worse and lesser known Florida law.
2013-01-29 03:36:52 PM  
3 votes:
lolcat.com
2013-01-29 03:09:49 PM  
3 votes:
Also, this is the opposite of the carjacking scene from The Philadelphia Experiment:

"Where the hell is the clutch?"
"It's an automatic!"
"What the hell is an automatic?"
2013-01-29 02:59:14 PM  
3 votes:
They're not so much car thieves as GTA enthusiasts.
2013-01-29 02:59:09 PM  
3 votes:
My new car is a stick for these reasons:

1. I like driving a stick because it makes me feel like a racecar driver, even if I do drive like a non-senile granny.

2. The car was a lot cheaper than the model with automatic.

3. A friend told me her friend was carjacked by three Urban Yoots. They pushed her out of the car, grabbed her purse and were so flustered by it being a standard that they not only left her car, but the kid who had her purse gave it back to her.
2013-01-29 02:55:07 PM  
3 votes:
2.bp.blogspot.com i.imgur.com
2013-01-29 05:51:46 PM  
2 votes:

thamike: What's the over/under for people who drive manual bright yellow Corvettes?


3 1/2 inches
2013-01-29 03:52:57 PM  
2 votes:
I've always thought of the stereotypical Farker as someone who:

* drives a manual,
* drinks only microbrews, and
* runs Linux.

/1 out of 3
//long way to go to win the Fark Triple Crown
2013-01-29 03:25:05 PM  
2 votes:
Manual transmission is superior to automatic
Typewriters are superior to computers
A pair of sticks is superior to a lighter
A compass and map are superior to GPS
Leaches and swamproot are superior to medicine.
2013-01-29 03:22:23 PM  
2 votes:

TyrannyOfThe3Squares: shanrick: It's hard to hold your beer and work a stick shift.

Was trying to decide on "Smart" or "Funny", but really, with a little practice, you won't spill a drop!


I was gonna go with "beer can helmet."
2013-01-29 03:21:54 PM  
2 votes:

tricycleracer: NASAM: My son just got his permit and I've been looking for a car for him. My three stipulations: $5k or less, 4 cylinder, and manual. Can't find anything anywhere.

No old GTIs or Miatas in your part of the world?


Miatas are great little cars. I'm on my second one. I convinced a friend that a Miata is the best possible choice for his teenage daughter (with the addition of a roll-bar). It's not actually a fast car, though it is nimble. It only seats two! The intelligence of teenagers is inversly proportional to the quantity of teenagers, so when in a car you want to keep their number to a minimum. Used Miatas in good shape are readily available and reasonably priced. Finally, despite the limitations, getting her a Miata makes you "the coolest dad EVAH!" At least for the next hour or so. Teens are fickle and have a short memory.
2013-01-29 03:05:32 PM  
2 votes:
It's hard to hold your beer and work a stick shift.
2013-01-29 02:16:47 PM  
2 votes:
www.model-t-restore.com
2013-01-30 07:40:16 AM  
1 votes:

baka-san: my_cats_breath_smells_like_cat_food: /2nd car I owned was a 1990 VW Fox, another manual. Anyone ever drive a VW from this era where to put the car in reverse, you had to press the stick DOWN. and not down as in away from the windshield, down as in towards the ground, in the Z-axis. Those Germans are some crazy folks.

My 01 GTI is the same...

My old and much missed 1975 Triumph Spitfire you had to pull the gearshift UP to get Reverse


We are through the looking glass here people. Up is down, black is white, I just don't know what to think anymore.

/Dogs and cats living together!
//Mass Hysteria!!
2013-01-29 07:59:34 PM  
1 votes:

Satan's Bunny Slippers: Ok, having come home from work and perusing the thread, I have a question.

I'm a woman, who grew up driving stick shifts on everything. I'm very comfortable with any manual transmission, in any configuration, from cars to trucks to larger trucks to tractor trailers. I raced the quarter/king of the hill in my own car that I rebuilt from burned out frame up (seriously, I bought a burned out hulk of a 67 camaro when I was 14 so I could have it road ready by the time I could legally drive). And I won about as much as I lost.

I drive an automatic now. I choose to. Why does this make me less of a capable driver?


Because you're a woman?
2013-01-29 05:23:17 PM  
1 votes:

Savage Bacon: Never understood why people are so fixated on manual and feeling "connected" to their car, as if this somehow creates a symbiotic relationship. I drive my car to get from point A to point B and feel in control of it the whole time. It's a tool, not a toy, but I suppose that this is where the difference lies. I don't use a car to feel like I'm in the land of race car ya-yas; the land where you can't change lanes; the land where large fuzzy dice hang proudly, like testicles, from rear-view mirrors.


Bolded is the section where you become a condescending twat. Now you can go work on your social skills...
2013-01-29 05:11:21 PM  
1 votes:
That 3rd pedal's the EXTRA EMERGENCY brake...
it's for when you have to stop REALLY FAST!
2013-01-29 05:10:20 PM  
1 votes:
Every year this thread rolls around and I recall when my 6-speed sentra spec-v was stolen in Newark. Big surprise, I know, 6 gears instead of 5. But here's the thing, the kid who stole it knew how to pop the window out of the door, then unlock the car without damaging anything at all. Then he removed the entire ignition key-lock assembly from the steering column, exposing a tiny area with a slot that could be rotated with a flathead screwdriver, and TA-DAA the car would start! He was a very talented and detail-oriented gang banger undergrad, but he didn't think his cunning plan all the way through; the clutch and transmission boggled his teenage brain. The car was on the end of a block, he only had to pull forward. Yet he somehow managed to back into the car behind him several times before making a right turn onto the cross street. There he stalled for the final time, bailing out and leaving the car in the middle of the road with driver's door open. I had to push it to the curb in the rain with the help of Newark PD. In my PJs. At 2 in the afternoon. On a Saturday. To be 27 again. But I digress - the point is that he would've gotten away with the car if he could drive stick. And I kind of wish he had - the insurance check would've been better than my trade-in. But he left the Creedence so I can't complain.

/CSB
2013-01-29 04:24:32 PM  
1 votes:
Here are some other products that can help you avoid theft.

www.aerojockey.com
A thief is going to take one look at this baby and move right on.  Very few criminals looking to do arithmetic will know how to use this calculator.

www.aerojockey.com
Imagine the hilarity when theives try to play their Snoop Dog CDs on this.  They'll leave this one behind for sure.

www.aerojockey.com
Know how you're always losing your pens? Have you considered that maybe you're not losing them, they're being stolen? Well, not any more. A thief needing to write a letter will quickly give up when trying to use this pen.
2013-01-29 04:24:02 PM  
1 votes:
www.robertmanni.com
"What da third peddle fo?
2013-01-29 03:59:44 PM  
1 votes:

Tears_that_smell_like_dogfood: The Angry Hand of God: OgreMagi: 6 speed manual transmission, biatches.

That is what I have on my Civic Si. Absolutely love it.

That is what I have in my Tacoma 4-door. Absolutely love it!


A Civic?
2013-01-29 03:52:54 PM  
1 votes:

shanrick: It's hard to hold your beer and work a stick shift.


a moran i once knew, met up with him in bumper to bumper 5MPH highway traffic on the way to work one morning. he had one of those Omni/Horizon/TC3 econo boxes with a manual shift. he was driving the stick in stop & go traffic, drinking a coffee, had a cigarette going, was eating a bagel w/ cream cheese while he was rolling a joint. all at the same time. best part was he was a security guard in uniform, looked just like a cop. we pulled in by some warehouses and got stoned before work.

/ you're an amateur. don't drink & drive, you might spill your drink.
2013-01-29 03:43:56 PM  
1 votes:

DarthBart: Cheron: dahmers love zombie: I wonder if I could get a car outfitted with a 3-speed column shifter.  I could leave the keys in it all the time with zero worry.

Three on the tree, four on the floor. buy something nice and let me know where you are parking it

[www.pirate4x4.com image 800x600]


Oh, this brings back memories!!!!

CSB time:

I grew up on a farm. In the fall when we weren't in school, I rode with my dad taking loads of corn to the elevator. The farm truck was a 13 speed. It. Had. A. Red. Button. Now mind you, this was '67ish, seatbelts? what seatbelts? And the cab of that old international had lots of room for a smallish 6 year old to get off the seat and stand around not doing much as we lumbered up the highway, I'd peek in the glovebox or see what was on the floor behind the seat....then one day.....I did it. Dad was just driving along, stogie clamped firmly, cup of coffee in his hand....and for no reason whatsoever, I pushed the red button down. Hilarity did NOT ensue. After the most incredible noises of grinding and scraping metal, dad did get it shifted down. There's some small measure of advantage in being daddy's favorite-I got to live. But I never EVER EVER got out of that passenger seat again as long as I rode on those trips.
2013-01-29 03:42:10 PM  
1 votes:
I built a '27 Ford Roadster...wife demanded that I build it with Automatic transmission so she could drive it - apparently clutch pedals are like lava to her. I got a deal on a rebuilt TH350 transmission with manual shift valve body. You have to shift it throught he gears, but no clutch. Just bump the shift lever to the next gear. That was enough to piss her off, because "i don't know when to shift". Tell you what honey...when you see the valve covers (open engined car) being dented from something hitting it hard from the inside - shift gears.

She has only driven the car 3 times in the 2 years I've "finished" it. Ended up buying her a '51 Chevy with a full blown AUTOMATIC so she doesn't have to worry about it anymore.

If anybody tries to steal the roadster - they might be successful, but its going to take them a while to get up to speed. If you put it into "drive" - you're actually only putting it in 3rd.
2013-01-29 03:40:52 PM  
1 votes:

Wellon Dowd: Manual is better owing to the superior porn possibilities.


You truly are shiftless.
2013-01-29 03:40:21 PM  
1 votes:
blog.wtfconcept.com
2013-01-29 03:33:16 PM  
1 votes:

MindStalker: In before Manual/Automatic argument!


I wanted to do this too.

I'm not even close.


/kicks dirt
//leaves thread
///it's a stupid argument anyway
2013-01-29 03:28:27 PM  
1 votes:

OgreMagi: NASAM: tricycleracer: NASAM: My son just got his permit and I've been looking for a car for him. My three stipulations: $5k or less, 4 cylinder, and manual. Can't find anything anywhere.

No old GTIs or Miatas in your part of the world?

Miata isn't really an option. Rather him not have a two seater. But I can't tell you the last time I ran across a GTI.

No back seat is a good thing. Do you know what a teenage boy will want to do with a backseat?


But where are you gonna put yer guitar?
2013-01-29 03:27:08 PM  
1 votes:

NASAM: tricycleracer: NASAM: My son just got his permit and I've been looking for a car for him. My three stipulations: $5k or less, 4 cylinder, and manual. Can't find anything anywhere.

No old GTIs or Miatas in your part of the world?

Miata isn't really an option. Rather him not have a two seater. But I can't tell you the last time I ran across a GTI.


No back seat is a good thing. Do you know what a teenage boy will want to do with a backseat?
2013-01-29 03:25:57 PM  
1 votes:

Wellon Dowd: Manual is better owing to the superior porn possibilities.


Finally, a compelling argument for the stick shift!

I really have no comeback for that. I guess you could grind against the emergency brake lever, if it's in the center, but... nah, stick is clearly pornier.

/well, that finally settles that
2013-01-29 03:25:18 PM  
1 votes:

shanrick: It's hard to hold your beer and work a stick shift.


No it's not.
2013-01-29 03:19:07 PM  
1 votes:

antidumbass: Stick shifts are better for all the other drivers on the road because you can't use a cell phone or eat a taco whilst driving.
/2 cents


God gave you knees so you could steer while holding a cell phone in your left hand and shifting with your right.
2013-01-29 03:15:56 PM  
1 votes:
Never understood why people are so fixated on manual and feeling "connected" to their car, as if this somehow creates a symbiotic relationship. I drive my car to get from point A to point B and feel in control of it the whole time. It's a tool, not a toy, but I suppose that this is where the difference lies. I don't use a car to feel like I'm in the land of race car ya-yas; the land where you can't change lanes; the land where large fuzzy dice hang proudly, like testicles, from rear-view mirrors.
2013-01-29 03:15:50 PM  
1 votes:

shanrick: It's hard to hold your beer and work a stick shift.


If I can text while driving a stick you should be able to hold a beer.
2013-01-29 03:11:27 PM  
1 votes:

namegoeshere: I miss my manual. They're great in the snow.


That too.

FTA : Randolph has a message for the hot rods who tried taking his fast ride, "Guys turn your life around. You guys have got a lot going for you. Thank you for not taking my life...

/ citation needed.
2013-01-29 03:11:21 PM  
1 votes:
Stick shifts are better for all the other drivers on the road because you can't use a cell phone or eat a taco whilst driving.
/2 cents
2013-01-29 03:01:08 PM  
1 votes:
Manual is better owing to the superior porn possibilities.
2013-01-29 02:56:12 PM  
1 votes:
I would never buy a manual transmissioned car for this reason, but it's a nice added benefit.

Now, I'll just stick around for the standard manual v automatic debate which will culminate in someone feeling epically superior to everyone else by pointing out that there are hybrid manumatics or something.
2013-01-29 02:56:09 PM  
1 votes:
Oh, that's just an IQ test. Don't pay it any attention.
2013-01-29 02:54:58 PM  
1 votes:

MindStalker: In before Manual/Automatic argument!




And just!
2013-01-29 02:52:30 PM  
1 votes:
In before Manual/Automatic argument!
 
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