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(KLTV Tyler)   "I found him in bed with a naked chick, what was I supposed to do?" a) urinate on carpet, b) defecate on kitchen floor, c) Florida   (kltv.com) divider line 98
    More: Florida, Denver Public Schools, KLTV  
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18834 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Jan 2013 at 1:49 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-01-29 01:20:58 PM
D. All of the above

/DNRTFA
 
2013-01-29 01:29:30 PM
People do crazy sh*t when they are jealous.
 
2013-01-29 01:36:58 PM
Q: "I found him in bed with a naked chick. What was I supposed to do?
A: FFM
 
2013-01-29 01:41:49 PM
 51 year old Brenda Schumann barged into the room armed with a rifle

The rifle in question:

0.tqn.com
 
2013-01-29 01:48:22 PM
That carpet really tied the room together.
 
2013-01-29 01:48:27 PM
If the hapless hubby had bothered to put his AR-15 under the bed, this would have been easily avoided.
 
2013-01-29 01:48:30 PM
An armed insane-as-fark jilted wife is a polite insane-as-fark jilted wife.
 
2013-01-29 01:51:24 PM
How do you Florida?
 
2013-01-29 01:51:36 PM
During the struggle, Brenda kicked the girlfriend in the stomach twice. Donovan was able to take the rifle away and hide in a closet.


My hero.
 
2013-01-29 01:52:35 PM
The Aristocrats?
 
2013-01-29 01:53:23 PM
Didn't we do this one already?
 
2013-01-29 01:53:55 PM

Because People in power are Stupid: 51 year old Brenda Schumann barged into the room armed with a rifle

The rifle in question:

[0.tqn.com image 500x348]


Awesome! I would love to have one of those AK-47's.
 
2013-01-29 01:54:11 PM
Okay, has everyone in Florida de-evolved to the point that they lost the ability to be toilet-trained and just drop deuces wherever they happen to be?
 
2013-01-29 01:54:43 PM

gopher321: During the struggle, Brenda kicked the girlfriend in the stomach twice. Donovan was able to take the rifle away and hide in a closet.


My hero.


If donavan now has the rifle why hide in the closet?

/dnrtfa
 
2013-01-29 01:55:59 PM

Mirrorz: How do you Florida?


See article.
 
2013-01-29 01:56:21 PM
I think I could urinate anytime I wanted but defecating? Did she wait till she had to go before storming the house? Was she planning a day or two in advanced?
 
2013-01-29 01:57:21 PM
Did the cops rub her nose in it?
 
2013-01-29 01:57:52 PM

maxximillian: I think I could urinate anytime I wanted but defecating? Did she wait till she had to go before storming the house? Was she planning a day or two in advanced?


It's all that prune juice.
 
2013-01-29 01:58:03 PM

maxximillian: I think I could urinate anytime I wanted but defecating? Did she wait till she had to go before storming the house? Was she planning a day or two in advanced?


Meth. Not even once.
 
2013-01-29 01:58:12 PM

PsyLord: Awesome! I would love to have one of those AK-47's.


Please. Do not make fun of the ignorant.

/I laughed anyway. Never mind, go ahead.
 
2013-01-29 01:58:22 PM
That's a rough looking 51.
 
2013-01-29 01:58:47 PM

maxximillian: I think I could urinate anytime I wanted but defecating? Did she wait till she had to go before storming the house? Was she planning a day or two in advanced?


No shiat, man.
 
2013-01-29 01:59:39 PM

AbbeySomeone: People do crazy sh*t when they are jealous.


Which is why everyone should be armed all the time.

/play for keeps
 
2013-01-29 02:00:07 PM
I heard about this a couple of weeks ago on WTFIWWY.
/Check it out. It's pretty much a weekly live version of Fark.
 
2013-01-29 02:00:24 PM
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say he hid in the closet after grabbing the gun because, he didn't want to shoot her, but she was still assaulting him. So she should be thankful that he didn't wound or kill her in self defense. He is I guess, in a way, a hero. Who must now clean poop and pee.

Also, yeah, a lot of commenters in original article are doing some assuming that he's a cheater. He was estranged, but who knows when he started seeing the other woman. It nearly sounds like the wife DIDN'T know who the woman was... "a naked chick".

Also, this is how Florida is used as a verb.
 
2013-01-29 02:02:13 PM
d.) Repeat the fark submission.
 
2013-01-29 02:03:55 PM
Well, i would say, since you are separated, and getting a divorce, and living in two different places, leave him the fark alone you crazy ass coont.
 
2013-01-29 02:05:00 PM

maxximillian: I think I could urinate anytime I wanted but defecating? Did she wait till she had to go before storming the house? Was she planning a day or two in advanced?


Depends.
 
2013-01-29 02:05:08 PM

meddleRPI: d.) Repeat the fark submission.


meddleRPI: d.) Repeat the fark submission.


meddleRPI: d.) Repeat the fark submission.


meddleRPI: d.) Repeat the fark submission.


meddleRPI: d.) Repeat the fark submission.

 
2013-01-29 02:05:23 PM
When Brenda looked away for a moment, Donovan grabbed the rifle and tried to take it from her. During the struggle, Brenda kicked the girlfriend in the stomach twice.

d.) Kick her in the box and shove her.
 
2013-01-29 02:05:55 PM

Galloping Galoshes: PsyLord: Awesome! I would love to have one of those AK-47's.

Please. Do not make fun of the ignorant.

/I laughed anyway. Never mind, go ahead.


I'm quite certain that the "ignorant" are making fun of you.
 
2013-01-29 02:06:11 PM
What was she supposed to do? I don't know, act like a civilized adult not a farking ignorant savage you twat.
 
2013-01-29 02:07:33 PM
Did the gypsy woman tell him she was her mama's bad luck child?
 
2013-01-29 02:11:16 PM
Why can't Fark threads be this awesome more often?
 
2013-01-29 02:13:42 PM

Slaves2Darkness: What was she supposed to do? I don't know, act like a civilized adult not a farking ignorant savage you twat.


umm..., perhaps you missed the Florida Tag?
 
2013-01-29 02:15:32 PM

PsyLord: Because People in power are Stupid: 51 year old Brenda Schumann barged into the room armed with a rifle

The rifle in question:

[0.tqn.com image 500x348]

Awesome! I would love to have one of those AK-47's.


That's a Glock, moron.
 
2013-01-29 02:16:38 PM
I didn't catch the slinging a dook bit from the headline. So that was a nice nugget of surprise when reading the article.

/aint nothing crazier than than a jealous menopausal woman with nothing to lose.
 
2013-01-29 02:16:47 PM

Lsherm: PsyLord: Because People in power are Stupid: 51 year old Brenda Schumann barged into the room armed with a rifle

The rifle in question:

[0.tqn.com image 500x348]

Awesome! I would love to have one of those AK-47's.

That's a Glock, moron.


Hurr and Durr had a joke party -and this is what they came up with.
 
2013-01-29 02:17:12 PM

PsyLord: Because People in power are Stupid: 51 year old Brenda Schumann barged into the room armed with a rifle

The rifle in question:

[0.tqn.com image 500x348]

Awesome! I would love to have one of those AK-47's.


That's a Glock dummy.
 
2013-01-29 02:17:13 PM

Slaves2Darkness: What was she supposed to do? I don't know, act like a civilized adult not a farking ignorant savage you twat.


Clearly piss on the floor and shiat in the kitchen made sense...
 
2013-01-29 02:17:48 PM
shakes fist at Lsherm.
 
2013-01-29 02:18:10 PM
Brenda and her husband have been separated for a few months and, according to the report, were in the process of a divorce.

Since she is a woman she will get probation......if the roles were reversed he'd be in jail for years.
 
2013-01-29 02:19:09 PM
According to the report, Brenda then urinated on the carpet in the hallway outside of the master bedroom. She then went downstairs and defecated on the kitchen floor.

Wow, that is one angry little bitach right there
 
2013-01-29 02:21:04 PM

ltdanman44: According to the report, Brenda then urinated on the carpet in the hallway outside of the master bedroom. She then went downstairs and defecated on the kitchen floor.

Wow, that is one angry little bitach right there


I can understand her anger. What I don't understand is the leap from anger to the peeing and the pooping.
 
2013-01-29 02:21:46 PM
Oh, and she found another rifle in the house and shot up the pictures/mirrors/decor.

Nice.

Maybe she fired some slugs into the appliances just for good measure?
 
2013-01-29 02:22:09 PM
we don't need a D:all the above because
C:florida has it covered

maybe she was trying to mark her territory (too late)
some folks use graffiti...others use what is available
i am 3 years older, had a stroke and still look younger than her!
 
2013-01-29 02:23:57 PM

garkola: Oh, and she found another rifle in the house and shot up the pictures/mirrors/decor.

Nice.

Maybe she fired some slugs into the appliances just for good measure?


Where do you see it say anything about shooting up anything, just says she destroyed, she could of been slamming the butt into things for all we know.
 
2013-01-29 02:29:10 PM

Jument


I can understand her anger. What I don't understand is the leap from anger to the peeing and the pooping.


She was marking her territory and/or asserting dominance.
 
2013-01-29 02:33:21 PM
EVERYONE in Florida should have a gun. It would greatly reduce fark source material, but still...
 
2013-01-29 02:33:51 PM

Because People in power are Stupid: Galloping Galoshes: PsyLord: Awesome! I would love to have one of those AK-47's.

Please. Do not make fun of the ignorant.

/I laughed anyway. Never mind, go ahead.

I'm quite certain that the "ignorant" are making fun of you.


Perhaps, but I'm better armed.
 
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