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(Santa Rosa Press Democrat)   Guy Fieri's new wine is quizzical, yet decisive, with a piquant nose redolent of Rohypnol, in-mouth notes of Axe Body Spray, and an exuberant finish of Zubaz stained with tanning oil and sack sweat   (pressdemocrat.com) divider line 143
    More: Sick, Guy Fieri, Sonoma County, drive in, tasting room, noses  
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12436 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Jan 2013 at 4:52 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-01-28 05:23:46 PM
At least he's not making Welch's commercials like that other guy whose not a chef.
 
2013-01-28 05:25:10 PM
Sam Neill has a vineyard. I would buy his wine.
Guy Fietti? I'd rather kick him in the throat.
 
2013-01-28 05:25:34 PM

Rapmaster2000: BOLD FLAVORS!


born_yesterday: Now his voice is in my head, you bastard!!!!


\ FIST BUMP /
 
2013-01-28 05:25:36 PM

TheShavingofOccam123: sno man: Cythraul: MaudlinMutantMollusk: I'll be glad when that porcupine's 15 minutes is up

I'm sure Food Network will just find another way to re-package him for the masses.

Or they'll just get a new more vapid personality with even less actual food skills.  Guy makes me miss Bobby Flay and that makes me angry because I really disliked Bobby Flay.

I like Jacques Pepin. He can debone a chicken in no time at all. Bourdain has him on video. Some other Farker pointed the video out.


I do to.  He is a very highly skilled chef, and writes a good cookbook.  I have Jacques and Julia Cooking At Home, Art of Cooking is on my wish list, but he's on PBS.  It's the Food Network's lowering standards we're complaining about...
 
2013-01-28 05:27:09 PM

WMCB: Problem is that it'll just clog up the already full over-priced California hyped wine market even further. I'll keep my box wine, thanks.


Boxed wine? Why so fancy? Now that there is wine in foil pouches hanging from hooks at my Safeway.
 
2013-01-28 05:27:31 PM
i478.photobucket.com
 
2013-01-28 05:29:02 PM

uncleacid: At least he's not making Welch's commercials like that other guy whose not a chef.


At least Alton Brown went to school to learn how to cook, and did actual research on the why and how of cooking.  Yes, it show was often a bit to silly for me, but at least the explained things in ways that were sure to stick with most people.
 
2013-01-28 05:30:56 PM
foodnetworkhumor.com
 
2013-01-28 05:33:07 PM

js34603: Oh good it's been almost a week since we had a Guy Fieri hate thread.

Thank god and/or Fark moderators for an outlet for all out impotent hate.


Bad news. Guy is going to sleep with you.
 
2013-01-28 05:33:08 PM

vernonFL: I normally don't buy "celebrity" wines, but the AC/DC wine isn't bad.


[encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com image 199x253]


I haven't gotten around to actually pulling the trigger, but I would like to get my hands on some of this.

www.winelog.net

On a side note, I ran into Guy and his son about 3 years ago at the National Museum of Natural History and he talked to us for a minute. Seemed nice enough.
 
2013-01-28 05:34:19 PM

WMCB: sno man: On topic, it's only 5 acres, he can't do too much damage.

Five acres is enough to produce a a pretty sizable vintage, and the flavor of Russian River grapes is subtle enough that even the douchiest of douches will find it effective at wooing undergrads and hipster chicks.

Ooh, you have the new Guy Fieri Pinot! It pairs so well with your hot ham and cheese! Do me now!


first, (still lol'ing)
second, that's only about 42,500 boxes of wine if it's all planted, or is my math way off?
 
2013-01-28 05:36:19 PM

Infobahn: WMCB: Problem is that it'll just clog up the already full over-priced California hyped wine market even further. I'll keep my box wine, thanks.

Boxed wine? Why so fancy? Now that there is wine in foil pouches hanging from hooks at my Safeway.


Considering that the sealed bags may well be the optimal wine storage media...
 
2013-01-28 05:36:48 PM
If I'm going to buy celebrity booze, it will be Ray Stantz's vodka.  Personally, I would have expected Dr. Peter Venkman to endorse such a thing first.
 
2013-01-28 05:38:28 PM
I would drink that wine Willie from "Duck Dynasty" made than Guy's wine ANY day!
 
2013-01-28 05:41:06 PM
I see him around town occasionally.

Sorta douche but has done some nice work for the community.


Don't go to Tex Wasabi's.

they do sushi and BBQ and both not so good.
 
2013-01-28 05:41:06 PM

Ed Finnerty: js34603: Oh good it's been almost a week since we had a Guy Fieri hate thread.

Thank god and/or Fark moderators for an outlet for all out impotent hate.

Bad news. Guy is going to sleep with you.


Good good, let the butthurt flow through you.

My conclusion is that Farkers hate Fieri because he gets paid to stuff his fat face with disgusting food. Farkers do that for free in their basements and this guy gets to travel around the country to do it. That makes us ball up our fists in futile anger and rage about his lack of culinary knowledge.

Because I doubt anyone is dumb enough to hate him because of his shtick with the bleached hair and sunglasses. That would just be farking dumb since every person in this thread would bleach their hair and start saying "flavor town" every other sentence if they were offered 1/10 the amount of money he makes.

So it must be that other thing that causes all the butthurt. Jealousy.
 
2013-01-28 05:43:31 PM
blatz514
Best wine EVar!
[Winking owl.jpg]


Not sure about the shiraz, but the cabernet sauvignon usually is quite good.

It is probably better then some far more expensive wines in that range.
 
2013-01-28 05:45:33 PM

This text is now purple: Infobahn: WMCB: Problem is that it'll just clog up the already full over-priced California hyped wine market even further. I'll keep my box wine, thanks.

Boxed wine? Why so fancy? Now that there is wine in foil pouches hanging from hooks at my Safeway.

Considering that the sealed bags may well be the optimal wine storage media...


Point taken.
 
2013-01-28 05:46:21 PM

js34603: Ed Finnerty: js34603: Oh good it's been almost a week since we had a Guy Fieri hate thread.

Thank god and/or Fark moderators for an outlet for all out impotent hate.

Bad news. Guy is going to sleep with you.

Good good, let the butthurt flow through you.

My conclusion is that Farkers hate Fieri because he gets paid to stuff his fat face with disgusting food. Farkers do that for free in their basements and this guy gets to travel around the country to do it. That makes us ball up our fists in futile anger and rage about his lack of culinary knowledge.

Because I doubt anyone is dumb enough to hate him because of his shtick with the bleached hair and sunglasses. That would just be farking dumb since every person in this thread would bleach their hair and start saying "flavor town" every other sentence if they were offered 1/10 the amount of money he makes.

So it must be that other thing that causes all the butthurt. Jealousy.


i214.photobucket.com
 
2013-01-28 05:47:22 PM

sno man: Or they'll just get a new more vapid personality with even less actual food skills.  Guy makes me miss Bobby Flay and that makes me angry because I really disliked Bobby Flay.


I agree so wholeheartedly but I was never able to articulate it so well. Booby Flay usually annoyed me so much that I couldn't seem to find the words to describe it, or how. Douchecanoe is about the best I can muster.
 
2013-01-28 05:48:20 PM

blottoman: I say he should open a hunting range, instead of:

"Our son's names are Hunter and Ryder, so we'd call it the 'Hunt and Ryde,'" Fieri said.

How's Stalk & Walk?


Neal and Bob.
 
2013-01-28 05:49:04 PM
People don't like Guy Fieri because he comes across as a douche. He's probably not a bad guy at all, but his whole appearance and schtick screams late 90's "OMG, I'M SO EXTREME AND AWESOME, LOOK HOW AWESOMELY EXTREME I AM!"

I just don't get the appeal.
 
2013-01-28 05:49:10 PM

js34603: Ed Finnerty: js34603: Oh good it's been almost a week since we had a Guy Fieri hate thread.

Thank god and/or Fark moderators for an outlet for all out impotent hate.

Bad news. Guy is going to sleep with you.

Good good, let the butthurt flow through you.

My conclusion is that Farkers hate Fieri because he gets paid to stuff his fat face with disgusting food. Farkers do that for free in their basements and this guy gets to travel around the country to do it. That makes us ball up our fists in futile anger and rage about his lack of culinary knowledge.

Because I doubt anyone is dumb enough to hate him because of his shtick with the bleached hair and sunglasses. That would just be farking dumb since every person in this thread would bleach their hair and start saying "flavor town" every other sentence if they were offered 1/10 the amount of money he makes.

So it must be that other thing that causes all the butthurt. Jealousy.


There's a lot of butthurt in the words above these. All of it is after your name, my angry friend.

I realize you're emotional right now so I'll put in a word and see if Guy will still consider sleeping with you.
 
2013-01-28 05:49:51 PM
Is it just me, or does he always look drunk on his show?
 
2013-01-28 05:50:32 PM

mafiageek1980: I would drink that wine Willie from "Duck Dynasty" made than Guy's wine ANY day!


How about the wine Chumlee made on an episode of "Pawn Stars"?
 
2013-01-28 05:52:30 PM

wingnut396: If I'm going to buy celebrity booze, it will be Ray Stantz's vodka.  Personally, I would have expected Dr. Peter Venkman to endorse such a thing first.


I have that skull. Local place brought it in for me. All I had to do was finish it. It wasn't as bad as Id expected and much better than some other name brands of "quality" vodak.
 
2013-01-28 05:53:15 PM

myrrh: ...but what about mouthfeel?

/mouthfeel


The mouthfeel is reminiscent of stuffing a mid-sized European hedgehog that has freshly done blond highlighted fur into ones mouth.
 
2013-01-28 05:53:30 PM

Soy Cowboy: Is it just me, or does he always look drunk on his show?


This is Fark, which one of us here doesn't?
 
2013-01-28 05:55:58 PM
(This comment has been removed)
 
2013-01-28 05:56:15 PM

wingnut396: If I'm going to buy celebrity booze, it will be Ray Stantz's vodka.  Personally, I would have expected Dr. Peter Venkman to endorse such a thing first.



CSB:

I have an autographed bottle at home.
 
2013-01-28 05:56:25 PM
js34603

Oh good it's been almost a week since we had a Guy Fieri hate thread.

Thank god and/or Fark moderators for an outlet for all out impotent hate.

Well on the plus side it gives both douch nozzle groups some time off from the non stop "ban gunnnnzz" whining.
 
2013-01-28 05:58:16 PM
Aside from looking like someone I should hate, has Guy Fieri actually done anything to deserve the hate that he's inspired in people? I'm honestly curious.
 
2013-01-28 06:00:09 PM

Infobahn: NTTAWWT


heck, i'm jealous. i've never heard anything about that region except thats amazingly beautiful and the idea of being a "gentleman farmer" and dabbling with making wine really sounds like a wonderful hobby/small business.
 
2013-01-28 06:01:22 PM

robostapler: Aside from looking like someone I should hate, has Guy Fieri actually done anything to deserve the hate that he's inspired in people? I'm honestly curious.



He arrived here via time machine from 1997, and refuses to tell us how time travel works.
 
2013-01-28 06:03:52 PM

dryknife: mafiageek1980: I would drink that wine Willie from "Duck Dynasty" made than Guy's wine ANY day!

How about the wine Chumlee made on an episode of "Pawn Stars"?


Dunno, never seen that show, lol!
 
2013-01-28 06:08:33 PM

Rapmaster2000: wingnut396: I had a glass of that brew and let me tell you its off the hook! That taste there will drive you straight to downtown wine town. Its just pops that much, for real. And for the final kicker, its totally organic. So for rock star vino at rock bottom pricing, pick up this bad mamma-jamma.

BOLD FLAVORS!


It brings the party all the way to Flavortown - this wine is MONEY!
 
2013-01-28 06:10:45 PM

The_Sponge: wingnut396: If I'm going to buy celebrity booze, it will be Ray Stantz's vodka.  Personally, I would have expected Dr. Peter Venkman to endorse such a thing first.


CSB:

I have an autographed bottle at home.


I'd buy one, especially if he signed it as Ray. Its not so much that it is in a skull bottle, that just a clever design in a crowded market. Its the woo in the his pitch that is farking hilarious, it just sounds so much like Ghostbusters.
 
2013-01-28 06:10:45 PM

blatz514: Best wine EVar!

[1.bp.blogspot.com image 850x1133]


First thing I thought of when I saw the name...

images3.wikia.nocookie.net

Back to the story, I didn't really get the whole Guy Fieri is a douchebag hate. So, I decided to watch an episode of Diners, Drive-In's, and Dives.
In half an episode, he has managed to piss me off.
He knows nothing about food and appears to just be spouting off things. He makes no actual review of the food he is eating only a "MMM YUM" reaction. FFS, Man v Food does at least give a description of the food as he is eating even if it is generic.
He actually asked a man that GROUND HIS OWN BEEF, where the "patty machine" is...a patty machine...in a small diner...where the owner grounds his own beef. This man is a jackass and a douchebag of the highest caliber.
 
2013-01-28 06:15:16 PM

UberDave: sno man: Cythraul: MaudlinMutantMollusk: I'll be glad when that porcupine's 15 minutes is up

I'm sure Food Network will just find another way to re-package him for the masses.

Or they'll just get a new more vapid personality with even less actual food skills.  Guy makes me miss Bobby Flay and that makes me angry because I really disliked Bobby Flay.


I think if Chairman Kaga had encouraged chef Morimoto to karate Bobby Flay's nards with a tenderizing mallet it would have made for the most watched entertainment in Food Network history...


Bobby Flay isn't Wolfman
 
2013-01-28 06:15:56 PM

Cythraul: sno man: Cythraul: MaudlinMutantMollusk: I'll be glad when that porcupine's 15 minutes is up

I'm sure Food Network will just find another way to re-package him for the masses.

Or they'll just get a new more vapid personality with even less actual food skills.  Guy makes me miss Bobby Flay and that makes me angry because I really disliked Bobby Flay.

I completely tuned out after Good Eats was cancelled. But it's been clear for a long time that Food Network has been transforming itself into the MTV of food.



Same here, and I totally agree.  Don't get me wrong, I would do horrible, nasty, nasty things with and to this woman:
3.bp.blogspot.com
But I have zero desire to watch her show or the newest crop of shows like hers.  If I were pressed, I would say that her show and others are too "cute" and focus on the ADD, zero ability to focus viewers who want quick, uninspired dishes.

"This meal is exotic you say?  How so"
"Oh I used coconut milk instead of regular cow milk"
"..."
 
2013-01-28 06:17:31 PM
hey, wait just a minute... his last name is really FERRY... he 'took' the italian spelling in 1996... this changes EVERYTHING!
 
2013-01-28 06:22:32 PM
His name is Guy Ferry.

bestthingslicedbread.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-01-28 06:25:17 PM
Do they add Donkey Sauce to the wine to give it a thick, white consistency?
 
2013-01-28 06:28:23 PM
No thanks, I'll stick with my Kyle MacLachlan wine.

...and some damn fine coffee.
 
2013-01-28 06:36:03 PM

Endive Wombat: uncleacid: At least he's not making Welch's commercials like that other guy whose not a chef.

At least Alton Brown went to school to learn how to cook, and did actual research on the why and how of cooking.  Yes, it show was often a bit to silly for me, but at least the explained things in ways that were sure to stick with most people.


great example: when you freeze things, ice shards break cell walls and release juices *begins stabbing water-filled ziploc bag with icepick* this will cause things to be mushy when thawed...
 
2013-01-28 06:37:15 PM

wingnut396: If I'm going to buy celebrity booze, it will be Ray Stantz's vodka.  Personally, I would have expected Dr. Peter Venkman to endorse such a thing first.


that stuff sucks. i bought a bottle, i now keep a Beta fish inside it.
 
2013-01-28 06:37:45 PM

Mr.Poops: People don't like Guy Fieri because he comes across as a douche. He's probably not a bad guy at all, but his whole appearance and schtick screams late 90's "OMG, I'M SO EXTREME AND AWESOME, LOOK HOW AWESOMELY EXTREME I AM!"

I just don't get the appeal.


He seems like an alright dude, but he's nothing special. 
DD&D is an interesting show regardless of host. I've been to 10 places featured on the show & liked them all. 
Wallace Station near my home is farking amazing.

Food Network is just getting stupid, and I'm sick of the food genres being created.
I'm not eating at a Korean BBQ on principle. I have a hard enough time with a Mongolian Grill, and there are no Bistros in China.
Stop it with this shiat.

Yesterday I watched a Kentucky-style BBQ competition on Destination America* just because it's my state. But I even asked my wife "Kentucky has a BBQ style?"

* After the Green Channel sucked hard Discovery just came up with a dumpster channel for reject Food Network, TLC, and History Channel shows
 
2013-01-28 06:45:50 PM

robostapler: Aside from looking like someone I should hate, has Guy Fieri actually done anything to deserve the hate that he's inspired in people? I'm honestly curious.


For me it's just his looks and shtick. Like douche bags with sagging pants or white guys who wear their hats at an angle and to the side a little.

And skinny pencil thin beards.
 
2013-01-28 06:48:17 PM
Cut the cord. I can't believe people watch shows about FOOD.
 
2013-01-28 06:50:47 PM

Spanky McStupid: Rapmaster2000: wingnut396: I had a glass of that brew and let me tell you its off the hook! That taste there will drive you straight to downtown wine town. Its just pops that much, for real. And for the final kicker, its totally organic. So for rock star vino at rock bottom pricing, pick up this bad mamma-jamma.

BOLD FLAVORS!

It brings the party all the way to Flavortown - this wine is MONEY!


You all are really knocking these comments out of the park!
 
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