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(Zim Diaspora)   Five dead in blast when cleansing ceremony goes wrong and the goblin they were beheading suddenly explodes. In other news: The going rate to rid yourself of a demanding goblin is $15,000   (zimdiaspora.com) divider line 135
    More: Weird, Sekuru Shumba, national police  
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10624 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Jan 2013 at 7:11 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-01-28 09:25:46 AM

Road Rash: I've always heard goblins were a blast


You're thinking kobolds.
 
2013-01-28 09:29:23 AM
www.wired.com

Ain't no one beheading me!
 
2013-01-28 09:33:06 AM

On the Side: I've never known a goblin to explode after being beheaded.


Mine does, especially since I got divorced in October.  About six times a week at current count.
 
2013-01-28 09:35:04 AM

ukexpat: New conspiracy theory that the government caused 9/11 by beheading goblins in 3..2..1...



There are at least 35 people who would probably believe this theory...
 
2013-01-28 09:37:12 AM

redheededstepchild: You remind me of the babe.....


What babe?
 
2013-01-28 09:40:18 AM
So Goblin is a euphemism for "wife" now?
 
2013-01-28 09:44:34 AM
I dunno, I'm sure the Goblin below spun a good bit of money for the execs at McDonnell.
www.dvice.com
 
2013-01-28 09:48:34 AM
i.imgur.com
 
2013-01-28 09:57:10 AM
Meth house explodes...
 
2013-01-28 11:08:40 AM
Africa's version of "The Onion"?
 
2013-01-28 11:13:10 AM
I feel sorry for whatever poor disfigured bastard they chopped the head off of because they thought he was a goblin. I'm surprised nobody has killed that dude that has the fungus that makes him look like he's turning into a tree.
 
2013-01-28 11:28:03 AM
Seriously, this far in on a story about a money spinning goblin making unreasonable demands and no one has mentioned Rumplestiltskin?

How poorly read are you farkers?
 
2013-01-28 11:47:55 AM

Gabrielmot: Seriously, this far in on a story about a money spinning goblin making unreasonable demands and no one has mentioned Rumplestiltskin?

How poorly read are you farkers?


Don't you mean poorly-read?

/Whenever I'm read, I'm read well.
 
2013-01-28 11:48:42 AM
Am I the only one who felt like someone dosed me w/ acid while reading that story? WTF?
 
2013-01-28 12:12:54 PM

Hanky: RobertBruce: Sgt Otter: $15,000 for a one Hit Die creature? I'd do it for 20 gp.

A spanish doubloon was just under an ounce - $1660 today.   You'd charge more than they did!

How about 40 silver?


I only accept payment in electrum or ningis.
 
2013-01-28 12:29:59 PM
OscarTamerz: I could understand if these peoples' highest level of technology was animal skin clothing and stone axes but this guy owned a trucking company and drove a car.

I wonder if he was good friends with one of Zimbabwe's corrupt and incompetant politicians? Could be "his" trucking company was originally owned by someone who supported the wrong party?
It's Zimbabwe, it seems the very worst of that country's society has risen to the top and now superstitious violent thieves are at the top of the pecking order.
I honestly don't see how that country will ever recover.
 
2013-01-28 01:03:11 PM
Not too dissimilar from a Catholic burying a statute of a saint to sell a house, or praying to one for financial help.

A bit more explodey than that, but no too different.
 
2013-01-28 01:05:40 PM

ukexpat: New conspiracy theory that the government caused 9/11 by beheading goblins in 3..2..1...


I have some proof that the WTC was built using goblin slave labor and there have always been rumours that they were walled up in the building when the project was completed.
 
2013-01-28 01:14:33 PM

big pig peaches: ukexpat: New conspiracy theory that the government caused 9/11 by beheading goblins in 3..2..1...

I have some proof that the WTC was built using goblin slave labor and there have always been rumours that they were walled up in the building when the project was completed.


Maybe they were doing some renovations and, while cutting through a wall, accidentally decapitated a goblin. The rest go all chain-reactiony and down comes the building!

/better than the thermite theory
 
2013-01-28 02:33:58 PM

big pig peaches: ukexpat: New conspiracy theory that the government caused 9/11 by beheading goblins in 3..2..1...

I have some proof that the WTC was built using goblin slave labor and there have always been rumours that they were walled up in the building when the project was completed.


That's no goblin!

3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-01-28 02:44:40 PM
Extra fee for hobgoblins?
 
2013-01-28 03:01:30 PM

theorellior: [www.wired.com image 650x366]

Exploding, you say? Hmmmm, that might help with annoying dwarves.


We just need to get them down, down, to Goblin Town.

/down, down, to Goblin Town
//You go, my lad! Ho, ho! my lad!
 
2013-01-28 03:18:14 PM

Keizer_Ghidorah: theorellior: [www.wired.com image 650x366]

Exploding, you say? Hmmmm, that might help with annoying dwarves.

We just need to get them down, down, to Goblin Town.

/down, down, to Goblin Town
//You go, my lad! Ho, ho! my lad!


Fifteen birds?
 
2013-01-28 06:05:27 PM

SkunkWerks: Keizer_Ghidorah: theorellior: [www.wired.com image 650x366]

Exploding, you say? Hmmmm, that might help with annoying dwarves.

We just need to get them down, down, to Goblin Town.

/down, down, to Goblin Town
//You go, my lad! Ho, ho! my lad!

Fifteen birds?


In 5 fir trees.
 
2013-01-28 06:55:52 PM

iheartscotch: SkunkWerks: Keizer_Ghidorah: theorellior: [www.wired.com image 650x366]

Exploding, you say? Hmmmm, that might help with annoying dwarves.

We just need to get them down, down, to Goblin Town.

/down, down, to Goblin Town
//You go, my lad! Ho, ho! my lad!

Fifteen birds?

In 5 fir trees.


What funny little birds.
 
2013-01-28 07:59:13 PM
Do not behead Happy Fun Goblin.
 
2013-01-28 08:46:42 PM

ciberido: Hanky: RobertBruce: Sgt Otter: $15,000 for a one Hit Die creature? I'd do it for 20 gp.

A spanish doubloon was just under an ounce - $1660 today.   You'd charge more than they did!

How about 40 silver?

I only accept payment in electrum or ningis.


Sorry, we only have triganic pu in house.
 
2013-01-28 10:09:52 PM

dahmers love zombie: redheededstepchild: You remind me of the babe.....

What babe?


The babe with the power.
 
2013-01-28 11:07:55 PM

Ghastly: dahmers love zombie: redheededstepchild: You remind me of the babe.....

What babe?

The babe with the power.


The power?
 
2013-01-28 11:18:06 PM

Smgth: Keizer_Ghidorah: Ghastly: dahmers love zombie: redheededstepchild: You remind me of the babe.....

What babe?

The babe with the power.

The power?

Power of Voodoo


Who do?
 
2013-01-29 12:25:18 AM

Ghastly: Smgth: Keizer_Ghidorah: Ghastly: dahmers love zombie: redheededstepchild: You remind me of the babe.....

What babe?

The babe with the power.

The power?

Power of Voodoo

Who do?


That you do!
 
2013-01-29 12:46:48 AM

Keizer_Ghidorah: Ghastly: Smgth: Keizer_Ghidorah: Ghastly: dahmers love zombie: redheededstepchild: You remind me of the babe.....

What babe?

The babe with the power.

The power?

Power of Voodoo

Who do?

That you do!


Not Voodoo.
images1.wikia.nocookie.net
Hoodoo!
 
2013-01-29 05:54:46 AM

Dogsbody: Perhaps it would have led to greater clarity in the article if the author had taken a sentence or two to explain just what the fark a money spinning goblin is.


I'd love to hear Samuel Jackson's explanation.
 
2013-01-29 06:15:55 AM

big pig peaches: ukexpat: New conspiracy theory that the government caused 9/11 by beheading goblins in 3..2..1...

I have some proof that the WTC was built using goblin slave labor and there have always been rumours that they were walled up in the building when the project was completed.


For the love of God!
 
2013-01-29 10:50:34 AM
basementrejects.com
If you flush them before they explode, you can watch all the other toilets explode into one giant ass-mess.
 
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