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(3 News New Zealand)   Good news: The key to happiness is to stuff your face seven times a day. Bad news: With vegetables   (3news.co.nz ) divider line
    More: Sad, University of Otago, vegetables  
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5791 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Jan 2013 at 8:28 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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gja
2013-01-24 09:33:50 PM  
Wait! Isn't vodka made by the distillation of fermented substances such as grains and potatoes?
I can do this!
 
2013-01-24 09:34:14 PM  
upload.wikimedia.org
 
2013-01-24 09:40:02 PM  

The_Original_Roxtar: Smackledorfer: BigLuca: I tried eating 8 servings of broccoli per day once. I may have gotten happier, but everyone within a 10' radius around me became much less happy.

That goes away. I can eat a pound of steamed broccoli with no stink.

Unfortunately to get variety in ftesh veggies would double my grocery bill.

you're just used to it and the people around you are too nice to say anything about it. if you want to know if your farts still smell, go hang out at a middle school for a day.


I don't even get much in the way of farts at all.

Will you now call me a liar or say I am too stupid to know if I fart?
 
gja
2013-01-24 09:45:46 PM  

Smackledorfer: The_Original_Roxtar: Smackledorfer: BigLuca: I tried eating 8 servings of broccoli per day once. I may have gotten happier, but everyone within a 10' radius around me became much less happy.

That goes away. I can eat a pound of steamed broccoli with no stink.

Unfortunately to get variety in ftesh veggies would double my grocery bill.

you're just used to it and the people around you are too nice to say anything about it. if you want to know if your farts still smell, go hang out at a middle school for a day.

I don't even get much in the way of farts at all.

Will you now call me a liar or say I am too stupid to know if I fart?


3.bp.blogspot.com

Oh COME ON, Marlee, I know you can't hear them but you gotta FEEL those things coming out!
 
2013-01-24 09:47:11 PM  
gourmetgardens.com

Challenge accepted
 
2013-01-24 09:49:42 PM  

Cyno01: [upload.wikimedia.org image 800x600]


This.
 
2013-01-24 09:49:52 PM  

StreetlightInTheGhetto: I was easily eating 7 a day, maybe more, for 5ish months last year. Yay garden. Boo that all the vegetables I buy in the store now taste bland as hell and are costly to boot (fresh anyway) and I don't really enjoy them at all. Trying to make it up by eating lots of fruit but eh.

I really need to find someone to teach me canning next year. I know how to in theory but am terrified of f--king it up and poisoning myself.

/spring can't come fast enough
//gonna plant onion and shallot seeds this weekend
///yippee!


I can just about everything. EIP with questions.
 
2013-01-24 09:51:41 PM  
Call any vegetable
And the chances are good
That the vegetable will respond to you.

/Rutabaga
 
2013-01-24 09:52:29 PM  

soopey: Veggies seven times a day? I'll have to poop like four times a day? Who do I send the bill to for lost productivity while I'm in the can?

On a positive note, my scores on the Fark weekly quiz will go up.


small amounts, modest quantities. don't eat until you're full, just eat comfortably. years ago i followed a fruit, vegetable and water diet for a while. i became so thin i looked like i was dying of a social disease. i became borderline anemic and my doctor was very angry with me. but god, I was thin, and clothes just draped off my 6'-3" frame. my face took on a skeletal appearance and my adam's apple looked like it was protruding from my neck. it was awesome.
 
gja
2013-01-24 09:56:39 PM  

KrispyKritter: soopey: Veggies seven times a day? I'll have to poop like four times a day? Who do I send the bill to for lost productivity while I'm in the can?

On a positive note, my scores on the Fark weekly quiz will go up.

small amounts, modest quantities. don't eat until you're full, just eat comfortably. years ago i followed a fruit, vegetable and water diet for a while. i became so thin i looked like i was dying of a social disease. i became borderline anemic and my doctor was very angry with me. but god, I was thin, and clothes just draped off my 6'-3" frame. my face took on a skeletal appearance and my adam's apple looked like it was protruding from my neck. it was awesome.


encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com
 
2013-01-24 09:57:13 PM  
It's true, though. Back when I lived on processed junk and two hamburgers a day, I craved nothing more than the sweet release of death.

Now that I'm a vegetarian, I find that all it takes to make me happy is the sweet release of other people's death. I'm not going to lie, it's been a real game-changer.
 
2013-01-24 10:00:21 PM  

semiotix: It's true, though. Back when I lived on processed junk and two hamburgers a day, I craved nothing more than the sweet release of death.

Now that I'm a vegetarian, I find that all it takes to make me happy is the sweet release of other people's death. I'm not going to lie, it's been a real game-changer.


I've found that just taking a more balanced approach to one's diet is simple enough. You can be vegan/vegetarian and still be fat. Not eating processed or fast foods, cutting out soda, eating some fruit and veggies, not eating too much, and a little exercise can go a long way.

I've already gone from 215 to about 175 by doing this.
 
2013-01-24 10:00:43 PM  

thisispete: CygnusDarius: I you know how to properly cook vegetables, it shouldn't be a problem.

/Just smother the shiat outta everything with cheese and bacon

I still have a problem with brassicas. When I was a kid my mother would boil the crap out of them. Cauliflower, cabbage and BBrussels sprouts would smell awful and taste bitter. I think I might buy some Brussels sprouts this weekend and try to prepare them a different way


Roll in a little bit of olive oil and salt then roast at 400 degrees for 20 minutes or until crispy on the outside, rollem around at the 10 minute mark to even out crispies.

Also works well for garbonzo beans. Or most vegetables. Kale makes great chips in about 5-10 minutes.
 
2013-01-24 10:02:48 PM  

OgreMagi: FunkOut: The_Original_Roxtar: TheHappyCanadian: so why do (most) vegans always seem so angry?

you'd be pissed too if you looked that sickly and malnourished.

Most people don't understand no one else really gives a fark about what they eat or don't eat. People who won't shut up with "OMG I eat yummy yummy meat all day long kill all dem animals LOL I'm so hardcore and sassy y'all can't handle me!" are just as annoying as preachy ass vegans.

We meat eaters only do that when the vegans won't shut the hell up. Normally, we don't bother telling anyone what we're eating unless it's something extra special.


Except that there are no vegans in this thread and yet how many are going on about the meat love?

/omnivore that eats lots of vegetables.
 
2013-01-24 10:06:44 PM  

StreetlightInTheGhetto: I was easily eating 7 a day, maybe more, for 5ish months last year. Yay garden. Boo that all the vegetables I buy in the store now taste bland as hell and are costly to boot (fresh anyway) and I don't really enjoy them at all. Trying to make it up by eating lots of fruit but eh.

I really need to find someone to teach me canning next year. I know how to in theory but am terrified of f--king it up and poisoning myself.

/spring can't come fast enough
//gonna plant onion and shallot seeds this weekend
///yippee!

http://groworganic.com/organic-gardening/videos/canning-green-beans ​Thats one video of a few and they also sell books .
 
2013-01-24 10:10:26 PM  

gja: Wait! Isn't vodka made by the distillation of fermented substances such as grains and potatoes?
I can do this!


Uh, sorry but those don't count as servings of vegetables, neither does corn.

Although if you sprout the grains then yes.
 
2013-01-24 10:19:25 PM  
Nice try, Morrissey. First you tried to make bacon more expensive, and now this. I'm onto you and all your vegan / vegetarian friends, you pretentious git.
 
2013-01-24 10:20:04 PM  

OgreMagi: FunkOut: The_Original_Roxtar: TheHappyCanadian: so why do (most) vegans always seem so angry?

you'd be pissed too if you looked that sickly and malnourished.

Most people don't understand no one else really gives a fark about what they eat or don't eat. People who won't shut up with "OMG I eat yummy yummy meat all day long kill all dem animals LOL I'm so hardcore and sassy y'all can't handle me!" are just as annoying as preachy ass vegans.

We meat eaters only do that when the vegans won't shut the hell up. Normally, we don't bother telling anyone what we're eating unless it's something extra special.


Actually, this happens pretty frequently without vegans around. Most people are omnivores anyway. If someone actually only ate meat, I actually be impressed. Someone going "Argh me carnivore meat meat meat!" and then proceeds to eat baked potatoes, roasted corn, and apple pie isn't really all that interesting. They're eating the same as the vast majority.
 
2013-01-24 10:29:41 PM  

Shadowtag: [gourmetgardens.com image 243x355]

Challenge accepted


Ooohhh, is that good? I love asparagus, never tried it pickled though.
 
2013-01-24 10:30:23 PM  

alienated: StreetlightInTheGhetto: I was easily eating 7 a day, maybe more, for 5ish months last year. Yay garden. Boo that all the vegetables I buy in the store now taste bland as hell and are costly to boot (fresh anyway) and I don't really enjoy them at all. Trying to make it up by eating lots of fruit but eh.

I really need to find someone to teach me canning next year. I know how to in theory but am terrified of f--king it up and poisoning myself.

/spring can't come fast enough
//gonna plant onion and shallot seeds this weekend
///yippee!
http://groworganic.com/organic-gardening/videos/canning-green-beans  Thats one video of a few and they also sell books .


I have books.  I just want someone in the kitchen with me the first time I attempt it who knows what they're doing so I can see first-hand.  Paranoid that I'll die of botulism from canning tomatoes incorrectly or worse lose a good amount of my harvest (plus the time spent growing and canning it all).  Like, I know I need an "airtight seal", but how can I actually tell it's completely airtight, etc.  Like I said, I know it's paranoia, but still.

http://www.tomatocasual.com/2008/02/22/botulism-real-threat-in-canni ng -tomatoes/

/wish my grandma was still around :(
 
2013-01-24 10:35:19 PM  
Came for the Terry Shiavo picture, leaving satisfied.
 
2013-01-24 10:41:16 PM  
May, August, and October I did a juice fast for 30 days each.  Veggie and Fruit juices that I make at home.  I lost 100 pounds by the end of the last fast.  The intake of micronutrients was more in one day, than I could have consumed in a week of chewing all that plant matter.   Example recipe: JUICE 4 Tomatoes, 1 Cucumber, 2 Zucchini, 3 Carrots, 2 celery, hand full of Kale, some basil leaves, Oregano, ginger, Garlic, 1 apple, 1/2 jalapeno, some spinach leaves, and a bell pepper.  Salt and pepper to taste.  I carried 72 ounces of juice with me all day, sipped it all day.  Was never hungry.  Now, I could never chew at that plant matter in a day.  No way.  But drinking was great.  Before the fast: 261 pounds, borderline diabetic, borderline hypertension, just entering the high blood pressure range, and the cholesterol was about to go bad.  After the second fast, all levels way in the normal ranges.  All of them, after 4 months.
It reset something in me.
No more sugar cravings.
Skin started glowing.
A couple old aches stopped.
And this chronic hives on my arms and legs vanished after 3 years.
Can't stand the smell of fried food.
Very aware of my intake.
A lot less meat.  Using at a flavor/texture in a meal, and not the main star.
Lost interest in snacking.
I don't think of food all day long.
I loved to cook before.  Now I'm a better cook.
The switch to a juiced vegan routine changed my life.  I juice very regularly, and my meals are mainly plant matter now.

/CSS
//Pineapple Crack Juice: 1 Pineapple, 1 Cucumber, some sprigs of Cilantro, 1 Apple, 1/2 lime, Ginger.
 
2013-01-24 10:50:27 PM  
It didn't say to ONLY eat fruits & veggies you silly people. It said to eat up to seven servings of them. It didn't say you couldn't eat anything else along with them. Go ahead and have your bacon & eggs and zucchini and tomato and make an omelet. Have a glass of OJ along with it: Ta-da! three servings of fruits & veggies right there. Now admittedly, you might not have room for a lot of crap if you're eating that much other stuff....but that's the point.
 
2013-01-24 10:56:28 PM  

TheHappyCanadian: so why do (most) vegans always seem so angry?


They don't have enough fat in their diet, or other vital nutrients.

/cut almost all fat out of my diet once
//almost went psychotic in three days
///this and coke explains batshiat supermodels
 
2013-01-24 11:07:10 PM  
It's because it makes you shiat better. The better your shiats, the better your mood. This is a basic human truth.
 
2013-01-24 11:08:50 PM  
Why juice instead of eating the fruits/veggies?
 
2013-01-24 11:11:42 PM  

Shadowtag: [gourmetgardens.com image 243x355]

Challenge accepted


Mmmmm Asparagus. The best way I've found to prepare it is to...

1. Fry some bacon until it is almost cooked, allow to cool.
2. Wrap said bacon around 2-3 stalk
3. Throw on the grill for a couple of minutes per side
4. Eat

The key is making sure the bacon is almost completely cooked because the Asparagus will cook very quickly on the grill.
 
2013-01-24 11:13:39 PM  

santadog:

//Pineapple Crack Juice: 1 Pineapple, 1 Cucumber, some sprigs of Cilantro, 1 Apple, 1/2 lime, Ginger.


You left out the vodka.
 
2013-01-24 11:14:27 PM  

Too_many_Brians: thisispete: CygnusDarius: I you know how to properly cook vegetables, it shouldn't be a problem.

/Just smother the shiat outta everything with cheese and bacon

I still have a problem with brassicas. When I was a kid my mother would boil the crap out of them. Cauliflower, cabbage and BBrussels sprouts would smell awful and taste bitter. I think I might buy some Brussels sprouts this weekend and try to prepare them a different way

Roll in a little bit of olive oil and salt then roast at 400 degrees for 20 minutes or until crispy on the outside, rollem around at the 10 minute mark to even out crispies.

Also works well for garbonzo beans. Or most vegetables. Kale makes great chips in about 5-10 minutes.


Don't forget the mayonnaise! (Hellmans's)
 
2013-01-24 11:21:01 PM  

doglover: Good veggies are soooo expensive.


If by expensive you mean way cheaper than junk food, yeah. I munch on carrots at work. 6 ounces of pre-cut organic baby carrots are about 60 cents ($1.80 for an 18 ounce bag). Cheaper than the $1.00 for a 0.85 ounce candy bar from the snack machine.
 
2013-01-24 11:23:33 PM  

TheHappyCanadian: so why do (most) vegans always seem so angry?


Those are the atheist vegans. And they aren't unhappy and bitter about being vegan.
 
2013-01-24 11:30:11 PM  

ThrobblefootSpectre: doglover: Good veggies are soooo expensive.

If by expensive you mean way cheaper than junk food, yeah. I munch on carrots at work. 6 ounces of pre-cut organic baby carrots are about 60 cents ($1.80 for an 18 ounce bag). Cheaper than the $1.00 for a 0.85 ounce candy bar from the snack machine.


1. You picked one of the cheapest veggies. Try a fresh non-root veggie.


2. Since people still need x calories a day to sustain them, $/calorie is the comparison one should be using.
 
2013-01-24 11:33:56 PM  

Smackledorfer: 1. You picked one of the cheapest veggies. Try a fresh non-root veggie.


I picked them because they are crunchy, tasty, convenient bite sized, and non-messy, requiring no utensils.


Smackledorfer: 2. Since people still need x calories a day to sustain them, $/calorie is the comparison one should be using.


Yep because the average American is several lacking in calories. MOAR CALORIES!!! *facepalm*
 
2013-01-24 11:36:23 PM  
 
2013-01-24 11:39:08 PM  

FunkOut: The_Original_Roxtar: TheHappyCanadian: so why do (most) vegans always seem so angry?

you'd be pissed too if you looked that sickly and malnourished.

Most people don't understand no one else really gives a fark about what they eat or don't eat. People who won't shut up with "OMG I eat yummy yummy meat all day long kill all dem animals LOL I'm so hardcore and sassy y'all can't handle me!" are just as annoying as preachy ass vegans.


This^
 
2013-01-24 11:42:59 PM  
I like meat. I like veggies. I like food. I find the easiest rule of thumb is to maximize the number of species on my plate at any given time. That way I'm not neglecting anyone's feelings.
 
2013-01-24 11:47:56 PM  

Dented Ford: santadog:

//Pineapple Crack Juice: 1 Pineapple, 1 Cucumber, some sprigs of Cilantro, 1 Apple, 1/2 lime, Ginger.

You left out the vodka.


To say nothing of the crack. The crack is what gives it its characteristic crack-like qualities!

/in fact, forget the pineapple, cucumber, cilantro, apple, lime and ginger!
 
2013-01-24 11:49:36 PM  

ThrobblefootSpectre: Smackledorfer: 1. You picked one of the cheapest veggies. Try a fresh non-root veggie.

I picked them because they are crunchy, tasty, convenient bite sized, and non-messy, requiring no utensils.


Smackledorfer: 2. Since people still need x calories a day to sustain them, $/calorie is the comparison one should be using.

Yep because the average American is several lacking in calories. MOAR CALORIES!!! *facepalm*


That is a lazy dodge.
 
2013-01-24 11:50:50 PM  

Dented Ford: santadog:

//Pineapple Crack Juice: 1 Pineapple, 1 Cucumber, some sprigs of Cilantro, 1 Apple, 1/2 lime, Ginger.

You left out the vodka.


You are not the first to state that fact when I give the recipe.
 
2013-01-24 11:53:58 PM  

Too_many_Brians: Except that there are no vegans in this thread and yet how many are going on about the meat love?

/omnivore that eats lots of vegetables.


I find these types of threads hilarious because I love hearing how unhealthy I must look for being a vegetarian. I usually just make a fart joke about tofu and broccoli (which is really one of my favorite meals) then watch other people biatch about how people who don't eat meat suck.

It's become so predictable, but it's like the gun threads or watching the tide roll in where you know exactly what's going to happen, so if you have nothing stupid to say why bother saying anything at all?

/if you want a steak or some chicken i'll grill it for you, and i've been told i'm pretty good at it
//i just don't eat it
///more for you
 
2013-01-24 11:54:59 PM  

Smackledorfer: That is a lazy dodge.


I always find it weird when people get upset at healthier, and less expensive, eating habits. It's like getting upset that someone wants to get vaccinated against the flu. Anti-vaxxers are ignorant.
 
2013-01-25 12:03:34 AM  

Smackledorfer: Why juice instead of eating the fruits/veggies?


1. I hate veggies.  I was brought up on very pale plates of food.
2. By extracting the juice from the fiber, your digestion takes a bit of a break because the juice is so quickly absorbed.  The energy you usually burn up digesting is then available to do other things.
3. A super punch of nutrients helps heal your body.  Like I said, all my borderline bad levels were all well within normal range after the 2nd Fast. And within 4 months.
4. I don't know if that switch, or "thing" inside me that killed all the bad cravings would have happened unless I brought my nutritional intake down to what I consider to be, a very pure level.
 
2013-01-25 12:09:17 AM  

santadog: 1. I hate veggies.  I was brought up on very pale plates of food.
2. By extracting the juice from the fiber, your digestion takes a bit of a break because the juice is so quickly absorbed.  The energy you usually burn up digesting is then available to do other things.
3. A super punch of nutrients helps heal your body.  Like I said, all my borderline bad levels were all well within normal range after the 2nd Fast. And within 4 months.
4. I don't know if that switch, or "thing" inside me that killed all the bad cravings would have happened unless I brought my nutritional intake down to what I consider to be, a very pure level.


I managed to give up soda pop easily enough. Replacing it with beer might not have been the best move.
 
2013-01-25 12:11:13 AM  
God dammit!
 
2013-01-25 12:13:41 AM  

ThrobblefootSpectre: Smackledorfer: That is a lazy dodge.

I always find it weird when people get upset at healthier, and less expensive, eating habits. It's like getting upset that someone wants to get vaccinated against the flu. Anti-vaxxers are ignorant.


Are you just talking to clouds here or are you saying I am anti-vegetable?

I ate 1500 calories today. 100 of it was fresh broccoli which cost 3.50 iirc. If the rest of my food cost that much it would cost me like fifty bucks a day to live.

Now, various veggies prices vary by season (look at apples this year!) but they also can surpise you and go bad before you eat. I shop every week but still lose some, and who knows whether my idiot roommates will mooch them or skip.

Root veggies are cheap and last forever. The rest increase the cost of your diet, period. Mind you I consider it worth it, but facts are facts.
 
2013-01-25 12:14:59 AM  

Gyrfalcon: It didn't say to ONLY eat fruits & veggies you silly people. It said to eat up to seven servings of them. It didn't say you couldn't eat anything else along with them. Go ahead and have your bacon & eggs and zucchini and tomato and make an omelet. Have a glass of OJ along with it: Ta-da! three servings of fruits & veggies right there. Now admittedly, you might not have room for a lot of crap if you're eating that much other stuff....but that's the point.


Cool. I'll have mine in pie form.

img.photobucket.com
 
2013-01-25 12:15:32 AM  

StreetlightInTheGhetto: alienated: StreetlightInTheGhetto: I was easily eating 7 a day, maybe more, for 5ish months last year. Yay garden. Boo that all the vegetables I buy in the store now taste bland as hell and are costly to boot (fresh anyway) and I don't really enjoy them at all. Trying to make it up by eating lots of fruit but eh.

I really need to find someone to teach me canning next year. I know how to in theory but am terrified of f--king it up and poisoning myself.

/spring can't come fast enough
//gonna plant onion and shallot seeds this weekend
///yippee!
http://groworganic.com/organic-gardening/videos/canning-green-beans  Thats one video of a few and they also sell books .

I have books.  I just want someone in the kitchen with me the first time I attempt it who knows what they're doing so I can see first-hand.  Paranoid that I'll die of botulism from canning tomatoes incorrectly or worse lose a good amount of my harvest (plus the time spent growing and canning it all).  Like, I know I need an "airtight seal", but how can I actually tell it's completely airtight, etc.  Like I said, I know it's paranoia, but still.

http://www.tomatocasual.com/2008/02/22/botulism-real-threat-in-canni ng -tomatoes/

/wish my grandma was still around :(


Cause when it cools, the lid will pop inward. If it doesn't pop inward, it didn't properly seal. If it pops inward, it's properly sealed. You can identify if it popped inward both audibly and from visual recognition.
 
2013-01-25 12:20:46 AM  

santadog: May, August, and October I did a juice fast for 30 days each.  Veggie and Fruit juices that I make at home.  I lost 100 pounds by the end of the last fast. ...Before the fast: 261 pounds


You lost 100 pounds and 40% of your weight in six months?

Please tell me I'm missing something here, or miscalculating, or something. A pound every other day is stretching the limits of what's metabolically possible for an extended period of time, and most doctors wouldn't want your weight falling that fast even if you weighed 561 pounds at the start. Funky and lethal things can happen in metabolic free-fall even if you've got fat left to burn and all the right nutrients pumping through your body.
 
2013-01-25 12:22:46 AM  
I just had two McDoubles and the Cheddar Onion thing. $3.25 and 1230 kcal. farking yes I love this country
 
2013-01-25 12:26:57 AM  

Smackledorfer: The rest increase the cost of your diet, period.


Not if you replace an unhealthy food with a serving of vegetables of similar cost. I know young guys at work who drink mountain dew all day, (then constantly complain about being tired, grumpy and out of energy in the afternoon, imagine that). Just replace that 2 dollars worth of processed HFCS (or that 6$ pack of smokes, or that bag of cheetos) with 2 dollars in vegetables. No one is saying you have to go to whole foods and spend $20 a day on veggies. That is a strawman is the silliest order. And yes, my very filling vegetarian meals (not vegan, 'cause I like cheddar cheese) cost about 1/4 of a big mac.  Facts are facts.
 
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