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(The Hollywood Gossip)   Check your internet Bingo cards: If you have "Naked," "Pooping," "Masturbating" and "Bullet Dodging," as well as, of course, the Free "Florida" Space, you are a winner   (thehollywoodgossip.com) divider line 51
    More: Florida, Rampage, Carla Bruni, bingo, Carnie Wilson, North Fort Myers  
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51 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-01-24 05:43:57 PM  
Not necessarily in that order.
 
2013-01-24 05:45:33 PM  
Aw man, I had tazing!

/so close
 
2013-01-24 05:46:13 PM  
That's no way to go through life, C), what's his Fark handle, etc.
 
2013-01-24 05:46:41 PM  
sorry about that. it won't happen again.
 
2013-01-24 05:47:02 PM  
Normal Monday night for a Florida Carny.
 
2013-01-24 05:48:42 PM  
Whatever I won, I don't want it.
 
2013-01-24 05:48:59 PM  
Meth, PCP or Bath Salts? Anyone wanna make a wager?
 
2013-01-24 05:52:05 PM  
Why do they call him Bruni the Bullet Dodger?
 
2013-01-24 05:52:40 PM  
DAMMIT. I had urinating instead of pooping.
 
2013-01-24 05:53:52 PM  
I was going to say, around my gay neighborhood (gayberhood), we call this 50 cent drink night.
/ Which is tonight
// Still time left for me to do the same
/// Except for the poop thing. Yuck!
 
2013-01-24 05:54:44 PM  
I would have pooped if she started shooting at me.

I'm not sure I would have gotten into that predicament in the first place though.
 
2013-01-24 05:55:41 PM  
fcit.usf.edu
Ok Florida is coming out
 
2013-01-24 05:55:50 PM  
I had Dog Farking. :(
 
2013-01-24 05:57:07 PM  
"The whole thing has a zombie apocalypse feel to it ... sans flesh-eating."

I must have missed the masturbating zombie episode of the walking dead
 
2013-01-24 05:58:16 PM  
Bingo? I thought that was my to-do list.
 
2013-01-24 05:58:53 PM  

Spanky_McFarksalot: "The whole thing has a zombie apocalypse feel to it ... sans flesh-eating."

I must have missed the masturbating zombie episode of the walking dead


Its actually every episode. If it only shows a zombie from the waist up, theyre masterbating. All of them.
 
2013-01-24 06:00:48 PM  

Hoboclown: Why do they call him Bruni the Bullet Dodger?


Because he dodges bullets
said with some incredulity and a confused stare
 
2013-01-24 06:04:18 PM  
When you get frustrated with cable, you...

Get naked and climb up on someone's roof. Jump off the roof onto someone and injure them. Knock down somebody's flat screen TV. Masturbate in someone's living room. Defecate on the floor in two places.

Dont defecate on the floor in two places. Switch to DirecTV.
 
2013-01-24 06:07:25 PM  
Well, If anybody creates a "Fark'n Bingo" game, I'm in!
 
2013-01-24 06:07:56 PM  

TinyFist: Hoboclown: Why do they call him Bruni the Bullet Dodger?

Because he dodges bullets
said with some incredulity and a confused stare


i.imgur.com

/thats where I was going to go with this as well
 
2013-01-24 06:09:27 PM  
Carny's took over our house, you've gotta help us!
 
2013-01-24 06:09:42 PM  
At first I missed the comma between violent and defecating, so I instantly wondered what that entailed. I mean, doesn't everyone make an angry face when their squeezing it out?
 
2013-01-24 06:10:58 PM  
Good times.
 
2013-01-24 06:14:08 PM  
Dammit, I had the wild card: Left Hand.
 
2013-01-24 06:14:12 PM  
I had "fark a corpse".
 
2013-01-24 06:15:49 PM  

justme317: Aw man, I had tazing!

/so close


It's there too.
 
2013-01-24 06:21:47 PM  
oyster.ignimgs.com
 
2013-01-24 06:24:55 PM  

Nuclear Monk: At first I missed the comma between violent and defecating, so I instantly wondered what that entailed. I mean, doesn't everyone make an angry face when their squeezing it out?


What angry double defecation tails might look like
ferocity.typepad.com
cdn.shopify.com cdn.shopify.com
 
2013-01-24 06:25:49 PM  
Sounds like a game of Cards Against Humanity.

\"two midgets shiatting in a bucket"
 
2013-01-24 06:34:11 PM  

Igor Jakovsky: When you get frustrated with cable, you...

Get naked and climb up on someone's roof. Jump off the roof onto someone and injure them. Knock down somebody's flat screen TV. Masturbate in someone's living room. Defecate on the floor in two places.

Dont defecate on the floor in two places. Switch to DirecTV.


For everything else, there's Mastercard.
 
2013-01-24 06:36:41 PM  
What has two thumbs, submitted this two days ago with a better headline, and is grumpy?

/this guy
 
2013-01-24 06:43:58 PM  
:FTFA: Bruni, 21, allegedly assaulted Tony Land, trashed the couple's North Fort Myers, Fla., home and then defecated and masturbated INSIDE the house.

So? Who poops and masturbates outside?
 
2013-01-24 06:45:07 PM  
Bath salts. Not even once!

/Don't do it kids
 
2013-01-24 06:46:56 PM  
Carnies. Circus folk. Nomads, you know. Smell like cabbage. Small hands.
/Now I'm afraid of them too
 
2013-01-24 06:50:16 PM  
I had ugly ass baby...


I was this close
 
2013-01-24 06:50:53 PM  

GypsyJoker: Sounds like a game of Cards Against Humanity.

\"two midgets shiatting in a bucket"


"Being a dick to children".


cgraves67: justme317: Aw man, I had tazing!

/so close

It's there too.


Yeah, TFA doesn't mention it, but the one from yesterday did.

Police are called, and they apprehend a flailing, babbling Bruni only after Tasering him.

And it has this gem from the 911 call:

img.gawkerassets.com


/shouldn't this one have the "Follow Up" tag?
 
2013-01-24 06:53:38 PM  
Awwww Mr. Peepers, not again...

cdn.static.ovimg.com
 
2013-01-24 07:06:57 PM  
The Aristocrats!
 
2013-01-24 07:17:13 PM  
At least there wasn't 40 lbs. of rape involved.
 
2013-01-24 07:21:40 PM  

sloshed_again: At least there wasn't 40 lbs. of rape involved.


wape wape wape

40 lbs of nonsense i say
 
2013-01-24 07:41:54 PM  

Drubell: :So? Who poops and masturbates outside?


Does the frequency of it matter? Or is just one time or two, for either one count?
 
2013-01-24 07:51:12 PM  
actually creating a Fark bingo game card....


need suggestions for spaces....
 
2013-01-24 07:54:05 PM  
I love that one of the tags for this article is "Carnie Wilson."
 
2013-01-24 07:55:59 PM  
2nd or 3rd repeat of this story. WTF?
 
2013-01-24 07:56:29 PM  
Some people just aren't taking the Romney/Ryan loss as well as most.
 
2013-01-24 08:06:31 PM  

GentlemanJ: The Aristocrats!


I came...for this
 
2013-01-24 08:07:53 PM  

gameshowhost: What has two thumbs, submitted this two days ago with a better headline, and is grumpy?

/this guy


Maybe, but this is a damn fine headline... I shoulda bought a card for this game.
 
2013-01-24 08:14:34 PM  
> discovered naked carnival worker Gregory Matthew Bruni on their roof

Florida in the hizzouse keepin it real from the get go
Respect the wang!
 
2013-01-24 08:28:11 PM  
i129.photobucket.com
 
2013-01-25 10:06:37 AM  

gameshowhost: What has two thumbs, submitted this two days ago with a better headline, and is grumpy?

/this guy


Are you going to tell us what it was or will we just have to take your word for it?
 
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