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(Huffington Post)   Ten amazingly disgusting things seen on airplanes. Not a slideshow, but possibly an appetite suppressant   (huffingtonpost.com) divider line 118
    More: Sick, breast pump, pedicures, adult diapers, airplanes  
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22131 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Jan 2013 at 10:31 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-01-23 09:17:28 AM  
I'm so glad I don't have to travel every week for work when I was a consultant.

7. Impromptu Snacking  - gross, but funny

1. Going No. 2  - I don't want to live on this planet any longer.  Seriously, WTF?
 
2013-01-23 09:38:55 AM  
10. Breast Pumping

And how is this a bad thing?
 
2013-01-23 09:41:27 AM  

swaniefrmreddeer: 10. Breast Pumping

And how is this a bad thing?


She was using a device instead of asking the dude in the next seat to yank on her teats.  Terribly selfish.
 
2013-01-23 09:59:43 AM  
Really?  Breast pumping and breast leakage?!?  Weak sauce.

I could have filled those spots with the lady on a flight who tossed her spent kleenex in the sickness bag and puked on the floor.

And, a passenger who insisted on having the bathroom door open as he washed his nuts in the sink.
 Both of those are way better.
 
2013-01-23 10:15:13 AM  
7. Impromptu Snacking
A first class passenger picked something off his bare feet and ate it. I saw it myself.


Richard Stallman flies first class?!?!
 
2013-01-23 10:30:59 AM  
AeroMexico does not stock airsickness bags in to seat pockets for passenger use. If you need one, you need to ask the flight attendant for it.


One time, I once sat across the aisle from a couple on a flight out of Mexico City who were begging a flight attendant for the airsickness bag. It took the flight attendant way too long to get a bag (15 minutes or so). The flight attendants had to clean the resulting mess in an area going back at least 3 rows of seats, all in flight. The smell was horrendous.
 
2013-01-23 10:33:48 AM  
An abortion.
/i keed...but yes, i worked in the ramp crew/airline industry for a long time.
//weed {:-D
 
2013-01-23 10:33:53 AM  
Babies.
 
2013-01-23 10:35:29 AM  
possibly an appetite suppressant or a laxative.
 
2013-01-23 10:35:30 AM  
Ugh, this type of crap is why I've lost my faith in humankind.

Wish it was still the days where people would dress up to leave the house and show some manners around others.

www.mediastorehouse.com
 
2013-01-23 10:36:13 AM  

swaniefrmreddeer: 10. Breast Pumping

And how is this a bad thing?


She won't let you jerk off while watching.
 
2013-01-23 10:38:17 AM  
An Air France flight attendant once farted near my head. Evidently she thought I was asleep, or maybe it just slipped out. No discernible smell but the sound was unmistakable.
 
2013-01-23 10:39:00 AM  
The breast milk isn't bad, although the leaking breastmilk should've been considered prior to flying. Use the correct containers and make sure they are sealed correctly. The baggies may not be the best option due to the long time without refrigeration and variation in air pressure while flying.

As for the rest of that stuff, I'm sure anyone who commutes by public transportation can come up with worse than that after just a few years. Humans are just gross.
 
2013-01-23 10:41:21 AM  
I was on a flight from DC to Rochester and they kept us waiting on the bus that takes you to the plane for a long while. Eventually the Captain came onto our bus to make an announcement:

"Yeah...there was an incident. A flight sickness incident...they're cleaning the plane. Like...really cleaning it. Be happy they're taking their time. Be REALLY happy."

We looked out and essentially saw a hazmat team cleaning what appeared to be an entire row of seats. The Captain just chuckled and walked off. Even with the deep cleaning, they had to cordon off a couple seats for our flight.
 
2013-01-23 10:42:15 AM  

Super Chronic: An Air France flight attendant once farted near my head. Evidently she thought I was asleep, or maybe it just slipped out. No discernible smell but the sound was unmistakable.


So you are saying the French fart in your general direction?
 
2013-01-23 10:42:39 AM  
Breast milk just might be the cleanest and most nutritious thing on an airplane.
 
2013-01-23 10:43:21 AM  
Hard to top some of those, but here's my CSB: Was flying from the ME back to the States. The guy in front of me used the plastic dinner knife to scrape the earwax out of his ear. Since q-tips only exist in the first world, he came out with a little pile of the earwax on top of the knife, probably about the size of a chocolate chip (but not quite as solid). He looked at it, figured out that he had no good way to dispose of it, and promptly wiped it off on the top of the seatback in front of him.

He then proceeded to the other ear and repeated the process.
 
2013-01-23 10:43:52 AM  
Hmm...

No Delta cabin crew on the list.
No United cabin crew on the list.

I dare say, this is incomplete.
 
2013-01-23 10:44:04 AM  
10. Breast Pumping
..She fully exposed both breasts ....

I would like to see the woman before commenting, this is a slippery slope.
 
2013-01-23 10:44:26 AM  
Thanks to these a-holes, we have more expensive airfare combined with the oldest and angriest stewardesses.
 
2013-01-23 10:45:56 AM  
Between the article and the first few stories here, I've come to a startling conclusion: That's GROSS.

Here's a slightly gross, but mostly heartwarming story about flying to combat the others. Apparently when I was very young, I managed to fling macaroni and cheese onto the head of a guy in the row in front of me. And instead of getting mad, the guy entertained me and my brother for the rest of the flight.
 
2013-01-23 10:46:14 AM  
Stewardesses used to be smoking hot chicks, now it's all effeminate guys and rejects from the East German Olympic swim team.
 
2013-01-23 10:46:18 AM  

Prank Call of Cthulhu: Babies.


More to the point "Woman with Baby", changing the damn kid in the cabin even after you are told there's a changing station in the bathroom. The entitlement complex of new mothers will never cease to amaze me.
 
2013-01-23 10:46:21 AM  
# 10 upload.wikimedia.org
 
2013-01-23 10:46:39 AM  

Super Chronic: An Air France flight attendant once farted near my head. Evidently she thought I was asleep, or maybe it just slipped out. No discernible smell but the sound was unmistakable.


Did you surrender?
 
2013-01-23 10:48:13 AM  
I was on a LONG flight home from Vegas...........not a packed flight, had an empty seat in between myself and the window seat....lady in the window seat had a nasty cold and used the same tissue the ENTIRE flight........I offered a new one several times and she declined.......couldn't get me off that plane fast enough!!
 
2013-01-23 10:48:40 AM  
The comments are pretty funny, too:
Once I was on a flight and the guy sitting across the aisle from me (in an aisle seat), fell asleep and spent an entire hour scratching his crotch--I don't mean little scratching, but he looked like a monkey grooming another monkey. People walking up and down the aisles were laughing like hell. The poor woman sitting next to the guy asked the flight attendant to wake him up and ask him to stop. The flight attendant said, "what am I going to do? wake him and ask him to stop scratching his privates?" Only one time did he wake up (to the sound of all the laughter). He looked around, went right back to sleep, and started picking and scratching for the rest of the flight.

Too bad he didn't have his camera. That sort of thing is made for Youtube, Fark, motivational posters, animated gifs and caption contests.
 
2013-01-23 10:49:24 AM  

I May Be Crazy But...: Here's a slightly gross, but mostly heartwarming story about flying to combat the others.


Heh...I was trying to maneuver my two-year-old self in my seat and to do so, grabbed the top seat of the woman in front of me. I got my hand tangled up in her wig, pulled it off, held it up for all to see and yelled, "Mom...this lady's BALD!" Poor lady.
 
2013-01-23 10:49:37 AM  
Back in the day when I would travel a bit more by plane, the most disgusting things I've seen were the seats on United's transatlantic flights.
 
2013-01-23 10:49:47 AM  

95629: Ugh, this type of crap is why I've lost my faith in humankind.

Wish it was still the days where people would dress up to leave the house and show some manners around others.

[www.mediastorehouse.com image 450x336]


something-something anti-conformity-you're-not-the-boss-of-me blah blah blah blah

/I fully agree with you
 
2013-01-23 10:53:09 AM  

95629: Ugh, this type of crap is why I've lost my faith in humankind.

Wish it was still the days where people would dress up to leave the house and show some manners around others.

[www.mediastorehouse.com image 450x336]


This is what happens when the costs get push down far enough that the unwashed masses can afford to fly more than once or twice in their lives. If flying went back to what it was then, rich people and business travel, then you'd see that again. However, as soon as we allow anyone who'd vote for Obama on the planes, everything goes to shiat.
 
2013-01-23 10:53:51 AM  
10: So?
9 through 1: Euw.
 
2013-01-23 10:55:19 AM  

SueDisco: I May Be Crazy But...: Here's a slightly gross, but mostly heartwarming story about flying to combat the others.

Heh...I was trying to maneuver my two-year-old self in my seat and to do so, grabbed the top seat of the woman in front of me. I got my hand tangled up in her wig, pulled it off, held it up for all to see and yelled, "Mom...this lady's BALD!" Poor lady.


Ha! That's pretty funny, even though it had to be mortifying for her.
 
2013-01-23 11:02:55 AM  
*Reads the comments..... Decides not to click on the link to TFA*
 
2013-01-23 11:03:35 AM  
My boyfriend was flying to NYC to attend a family member's funeral a few years ago, when he told me that the guy in the seat next to him jerked off under the little blanket they give you, and got some of it on his (my boyfriend's) pant leg.  He said when he got to his hotel, he threw those pants in the garbage.  I told him that had it been me this happened to, I'd have punched that asshole square in the face.  Of course, that's me.  My boyfriend has better manners, apparently.
 
2013-01-23 11:05:18 AM  

Jake Havechek: Stewardesses used to be smoking hot chicks, now it's all effeminate guys and rejects from the

1960 East German Olympic swim team.

FTFY.
 
2013-01-23 11:05:47 AM  
Folks, let me say first hand that you have NEVER experience grossness that is passenger flight until you've flown in this particular airline.

www.merinews.com

Think trapped in a metal tube with super strong aroma that is combination of rotten curry, flatulence, vomit, cow manure and  stinky cheese.
 
2013-01-23 11:10:07 AM  
My brother once decided to make a puppet out of an airsick bag to entertain his kids.
Like the woman in TFA, he stuck his hand in the bag and straight into a big blob of something wet, slimy and gooshy.
His kids thought that was way more amusing than a puppet.
 
2013-01-23 11:11:58 AM  

Coco LaFemme: My boyfriend has better manners, apparently.


If your boy let some dude jerk off on his leg, the issue isn't that he has good manners, but that he's gay.
 
2013-01-23 11:12:06 AM  

95629: Ugh, this type of crap is why I've lost my faith in humankind.

Wish it was still the days where people would dress up to leave the house and show some manners around others.

[www.mediastorehouse.com image 450x336]


You want to know where that era went?

Deregulation, and it wasn't a bad thing.

By the early 1970's, airline profits were in free fall. The passenger railroads has just been nationalized as Amtrak, because passenger rail service wasn't profitable anymore. The spectre of airlines going the same way was on the horizon.

Part of the problem was that the Civil Aeronautics Board regulated airlines very tightly, as a public utility. Routes and fares were set by government bureaucrats, not by market forces. Thus, unprofitable routes had to be kept around, and fares were set arbitrarily high by the government. Airlines couldn't discount fares below government mandates.

The approval process to add a single new route or change a fare took years, and was often denied because the application would be "too old" by the time they got around to reviewing it. It wasn't just regulated, it was regulated by a horribly inefficient and crippling bureaucracy that was famously opaque in its dealings.

Airline tickets cost around 3 to 5 times what they cost now, inflation adjusted. You had to be rich to fly, the "jet set", because only the independently wealthy or the very powerful within corporate America and the government could afford to. Airline travel was not for the masses. Flying was special because it was so expensive, yeah people dressed fancy to fly, because the people who were flying could afford to dress fancy.

Then deregulation came in the early 80's. Airlines could set their own routes, charge their own fares, and new airlines could far, FAR more easily enter the market. The modern hub system came along. Countless discount carriers came and went as the market sought out a new norm. In the end, air travel was far more equitable and open to the people through lower prices, without cumbersome regulations. You could now fly for a few hundred dollars instead of a couple thousand dollars.

Also realize that if you look at photos from that long-ago era, people dressed fancier in everyday life as well. Most men wore suits and ties as everyday apparel unless their job required otherwise. Women wore dresses, with pants being scandalous.
 
2013-01-23 11:14:03 AM  
My worst experience was a very loudmouth drunk dropping the F bomb every other word. Her companion tried to explain that she was distraught because her mother passed away and she needed to get home. All this happened while taxing for take off, needless to say it was back to the terminal for us.
 
2013-01-23 11:14:48 AM  
swaniefrmreddeer:
10. Breast Pumping

And how is this a bad thing?


Titties are only for fun sexy times, not some boring gross baby feeding or whatever, and should only be shown in public if they are Playboy-grade. Don't do that disgusting stuff in public, save it for a filthy bathroom with fecal bacteria teeming on every surface.

randomjsa:
Prank Call of Cthulhu: Babies.

More to the point "Woman with Baby", changing the damn kid in the cabin even after you are told there's a changing station in the bathroom. The entitlement complex of new mothers will never cease to amaze me.


How the hell? As little room as there is to work on the tiny change table in the toilet (and yes, I've successfully done this), there's literally NO room in the passenger area to change a baby. New parents can be pretty oblivious to the fact that just because THEY are blase and used to their baby's poop in all situations, not everyone else is. Or should be.
 
2013-01-23 11:15:21 AM  
What kind of world do we live in when HuffPo Recycles year-old Fauxnews Stories

Link
 
2013-01-23 11:16:24 AM  
My wife and I took our infant, less than 1 month old at the time on a flight from VA to NY. We were worried that he would be fussy and crying because of the pressure changes so we had him drinking from his bottle. As soon as he finished his bottle he squirmed a little and made a little fuss and let out the loudest explosive bowel movement we had ever heard. The few rows around us heard for sure and some were trying to hide their laughter. My wife was mortified. I was giggling like a schoolgirl because I'm immature and poop is funny.
 
2013-01-23 11:17:20 AM  
Nothing too gross, but on the way back to ATL from MN, the guy next to me kept burping softly. As in, every few seconds. He got a coke and one of those little bottles of vodka, I guess, to help him out, but I think it accelerated the entire process. He just did it ... for almost three hours. Just little belches.
 
2013-01-23 11:17:55 AM  
If anyone has taken a bus in Philly, you can forget everything that you think is gross on an airplane. Nothing is worse than the stench of a homeless man that shiat his pants sweating profusely on a 95 degree day in the summer. You can get off the bus, wait 20 minutes and hope that the next bus won't stink like ass, but it really is a crap shoot.
 
2013-01-23 11:20:07 AM  
Not flying related but...

I used to bowl in leagues quite a bit and one night while bowling I needed to use the restroom. I came in and there was a guy standing, sans pants, on the sink counter. He was wiping his ass using the cloth hand towel, the older model type that loops around, he looked at me and not missing a beat said " no toilet paper." He then climbed down and rolled the soiled part up into the case so that a clean portion of the towel was showing and proceeded to put his pants back on. Without a doubt the craziest thing I've ever seen.
 
2013-01-23 11:24:17 AM  
I flew to Florida last weekend. One the return trip, after I boarded, I went into my bag to pull out my PSP. I then realized I had some shell casings in there (3 .45s and 1 .22) from the last time I went to the range. So I took them out and left them in the seat pocket, so as to make someone's day more interesting.

I imagine some brass would be a nice break from all the feces.

/Went through security twice, and even got pulled for a 'random' check as I was boarding the plane. TSA either never saw them or didn't care (though I don't see why they should, and they are just inert pieces of metal)
 
2013-01-23 11:24:36 AM  

The Evil Home Brewer: *Reads the comments..... Decides not to click on the link to TFA*


i8.photobucket.com
 
2013-01-23 11:26:07 AM  
NYC. Chinese.Jitney.Buses

worse smell Ive ever encountered. And Ive smelled chitlins!
 
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