If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Boston Herald)   Working in a state drug testing lab means never having to say "I'm out of cocaine"   (bostonherald.com) divider line 46
    More: Obvious, Jamaica Plain, malfeasance  
•       •       •

9154 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Jan 2013 at 2:43 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



46 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread
 
2013-01-21 02:44:53 PM
Also, working for the police department.
 
2013-01-21 02:49:18 PM
I always wondered how to avoid that particular social faux pas.
 
2013-01-21 02:49:30 PM
Working in a state drug testing lab Hangin' out with Lindsay Lohan means never having to say "I'm out of cocaine"

She brings enough for the whole party.
 
2013-01-21 02:49:48 PM
wait... arrested at HER home?
 
2013-01-21 02:51:08 PM
I think whoever wrote that story needs to be drug checked too, horrible writing.
 
2013-01-21 02:52:57 PM
If he worked the Night Shift at the morgue, he'd have the hookers covered too.
 
2013-01-21 02:53:23 PM

Farkenhostile: I think whoever wrote that story needs to be drug checked too, horrible writing.


Good, so it wasn't just me who thought that.
 
2013-01-21 02:54:45 PM
Her name is Sonja Farak?
It's not a police drug laboratory, It's Farak.com.
 
2013-01-21 02:57:14 PM
The worst thing about these scandals is that they managed to get chemistry jobs.

/stuck in grad school and bitter as pure quinine.
 
2013-01-21 03:00:41 PM
I like the what, me worry? mugshot.
 
2013-01-21 03:00:48 PM
So 2 out of 3 drug labs were corrupt, that means right now a lot of people are packing their bags on a get out of jail free card. Convictions overturned and evidence gone so no retrial. Apple jack and raisin wine for everybody.
 
2013-01-21 03:00:50 PM
Headline is lacking, "smoking hot".
 
2013-01-21 03:01:13 PM
Hey, she had to keep testing the drugs. It was a drug testing lab after all.
 
2013-01-21 03:02:20 PM

Bondith: The worst thing about these scandals is that they managed to get chemistry jobs.

/stuck in grad school and bitter as pure quinine.


Grad Chemists have the BEST drugs, iirc. I knew one in college who regularly made amazing LSD, last I heard was making MDMA in the lab as well. Live it up while you can man, pretty soon you'll have far greater controls over you.
 
2013-01-21 03:04:10 PM

drayno76: Bondith: The worst thing about these scandals is that they managed to get chemistry jobs.

/stuck in grad school and bitter as pure quinine.

Grad Chemists have the BEST drugs, iirc. I knew one in college who regularly made amazing LSD, last I heard was making MDMA in the lab as well. Live it up while you can man, pretty soon you'll have far greater controls over you.


I'm an inorganic chemist, and not a very good one at that. My talents lie more in teaching than synthesis.
 
2013-01-21 03:05:23 PM
Cops have the best dope. Words of wisdom.
 
2013-01-21 03:06:53 PM
I know how they can get this problem solved and it doesn't take much effort.

All low level non-violent drug cases sent to the labs are now voided. That should clear up any overhead they have.

Would anyone care ?
 
2013-01-21 03:08:46 PM
Talking to my then-GF (ER doc) about how cocaine and heroin were once over-the-counter drugs, and I mention, "At least they sure worked," and she says, "They still do." She tells me how she used a heroin inhaler in the ER, mostly on kids in a lot of pain from bad fractures (bendys, she calls 'em) and such.

"Do you tell the parents you're giving their kid heroin?!?"
"Oh no, we call it diamorphine." Uh huh.
 
2013-01-21 03:17:31 PM

drayno76: Bondith: The worst thing about these scandals is that they managed to get chemistry jobs.

/stuck in grad school and bitter as pure quinine.

Grad Chemists have the BEST drugs, iirc. I knew one in college who regularly made amazing LSD, last I heard was making MDMA in the lab as well. Live it up while you can man, pretty soon you'll have far greater controls over you.


I'd love to try MDMA...and not have to worry about job security.
 
2013-01-21 03:20:19 PM

LarryDan43: Headline is lacking, "smoking hot".


I'm frequently being surprised these days by seeing pictures of people and finding out they are at least 10 years younger than their face looks.
 
2013-01-21 03:21:48 PM

J.Shelby: Talking to my then-GF (ER doc) about how cocaine and heroin were once over-the-counter drugs, and I mention, "At least they sure worked," and she says, "They still do." She tells me how she used a heroin inhaler in the ER, mostly on kids in a lot of pain from bad fractures (bendys, she calls 'em) and such.

"Do you tell the parents you're giving their kid heroin?!?"
"Oh no, we call it diamorphine." Uh huh.



"Mommy, I need to back to the emergency room....really, really bad"
 
2013-01-21 03:22:32 PM

Vectron: J.Shelby: Talking to my then-GF (ER doc) about how cocaine and heroin were once over-the-counter drugs, and I mention, "At least they sure worked," and she says, "They still do." She tells me how she used a heroin inhaler in the ER, mostly on kids in a lot of pain from bad fractures (bendys, she calls 'em) and such.

"Do you tell the parents you're giving their kid heroin?!?"
"Oh no, we call it diamorphine." Uh huh.


"Mommy, I need to back to the emergency room....really, really bad"


"I'll suck your dick if you break my arm!"
 
2013-01-21 03:23:27 PM
The article doesn't state the reason for the switching (personal use, sales, blackmail, etc.) not that it really matters. If she is willing to switch out samples, it draws her credibility on her whole examination and opinion on samples she tested. This is a nightmare for Massachuchettes and raises questions about the whole system itself. How do you avoid having testing labs and analysts being captured by the system (IE creating perceived desired results most frequently in alcohol/drug tests). A state lab seemingly can become merely an arm of law enforcement with personnel skewing results in the favor of supporitng police and prosecutors. At the same time, private labs with state contracts could be seen as having a financial interest in creating results to guarantee the next contract. Enhanced workloads only promote shortcuts and bad behavior that can destroy innocent peoples lives.

There are no good answers here. It would take a lot of money that states don't have to staff labs sufficiently and provide analysts to double check work to ensure accuracy. Sadly there is little interest in staffing labs at the expense of more cops on the street and prisons to house those who may or may not be guilty of the offenses they are convicted of. Even if there is adequate staffing and funding of labs, it is extremely difficult to avoid system capture or devise secure procedures to avoid it (police or prosecutors can tip off desired results intentionally or unintentionally such as in Rape/DNA testing). State labs and private labs will always have faults, and when bad analysts/technicians are found it creates a nightmare to clean up the potential mess that their misconduct caused and many times, the damage is irrepairable in terms of months and years lost by innocent persons.
 
2013-01-21 03:32:38 PM
Cocaine.........pffftttttt why not be a REAL chemist!?!
 
2013-01-21 03:33:44 PM
img2.timeinc.net

Why not be a REAL chemist!?!
 
2013-01-21 03:35:27 PM
Yes, it is kind of that a state drug tester might end up addicted to drugs. But I could also see how someone with no interest in taking drugs might end up in that job. The qualifications to be a drug tester are, what, a master's in organic chemistry or some such? So nobody trains specifically to get that job.

Pharmacists, on the other hand... I've never understood how every last farking one of them is not in the business solely to take drugs. And I don't mean "got bored and started sampling one day." I mean, "this acceptance letter to pharmacy school means Phase One of the plan has commenced."

Don't get me wrong, pharmacist Farkers, I'm not saying you're druggies. I just cannot figure out how it's possible that you're not.
 
2013-01-21 03:46:09 PM

semiotix: Yes, it is kind of that a state drug tester


I accidentally the img1.fark.net tag.
 
2013-01-21 03:48:41 PM
semiotix:

Don't get me wrong, pharmacist Farkers, I'm not saying you're druggies. I just cannot figure out how it's possible that you're not.

Especially when they're allowed to eat any pills that fall on the floor.
 
2013-01-21 03:59:16 PM

FunkOut: semiotix:

Don't get me wrong, pharmacist Farkers, I'm not saying you're druggies. I just cannot figure out how it's possible that you're not.

Especially when they're allowed to eat any pills that fall on the floor.


"oooh nooo, I just dropped all of these oxycontin on the floor, oooh nooooooo"
 
2013-01-21 04:51:15 PM

semiotix: Yes, it is kind of that a state drug tester might end up addicted to drugs. But I could also see how someone with no interest in taking drugs might end up in that job. The qualifications to be a drug tester are, what, a master's in organic chemistry or some such? So nobody trains specifically to get that job.


I dunno about this particular field, but in general an analytical tech requires a B.Sc. at most, and even then you're kinda over-qualified if you're not the manager. A grunt tech in an environmental lab doing routine analyses can get by on an Associate's degree.
 
2013-01-21 05:23:57 PM

FunkOut: semiotix:

Don't get me wrong, pharmacist Farkers, I'm not saying you're druggies. I just cannot figure out how it's possible that you're not.

Especially when they're allowed to eat any pills that fall on the floor.


I suspect they drug test them enough and take careful inventories so unless it's just a pill here or there they'll probably get busted eventually.

I'm sure even expired pills of a certain schedule have special procedures. I doubt they just toss them in the dumpster.
 
2013-01-21 05:48:14 PM
"Her"?
 
2013-01-21 06:09:50 PM
Rush says they should all rot in prison.

He hasn't said that lately, tho.
 
2013-01-21 06:20:12 PM
Goooooooo NoHo! Western MA is a whole different font of weird.

/Former resident

theawesomeboston.com
 
2013-01-21 06:47:17 PM
<b><a href="http://www.fark.com/comments/7547344/82031360#c82031360" target="_blank">lenfromak</a>:</b> <i>Cops have the best dope. Words of wisdom.</i>

Word!
 
2013-01-21 06:49:50 PM
<b><a href="http://www.fark.com/comments/7547344/82031638#c82031638" target="_blank">Girion47</a>:</b> <i>drayno76: Bondith: The worst thing about these scandals is that they managed to get chemistry jobs.

/stuck in grad school and bitter as pure quinine.

Grad Chemists have the BEST drugs, iirc. I knew one in college who regularly made amazing LSD, last I heard was making MDMA in the lab as well. Live it up while you can man, pretty soon you'll have far greater controls over you.

I'd love to try MDMA...and not have to worry about job security.</i>

You don't have to worry about drug tests or job security with MDMA, it's out of your system in 2 - 5 days unless they do hair follicle testing, then it's 90 days.
In all honesty 10 years in a security position and I got tested twice, the first time was at hire. The second time my boss gave me 3 days warning, other than
cops I don't know anyone who gets tested regularly.
 
2013-01-21 06:52:48 PM
Forgot http://www.passyourdrugtest.com/timetable.htm Link
 
2013-01-21 07:29:43 PM
disseminatedthought.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-01-21 08:23:32 PM

drayno76: <b><a href="http://www.fark.com/comments/7547344/82031638#c82031638" target="_blank">Girion47</a>:</b> <i>drayno76: Bondith: The worst thing about these scandals is that they managed to get chemistry jobs.

/stuck in grad school and bitter as pure quinine.

Grad Chemists have the BEST drugs, iirc. I knew one in college who regularly made amazing LSD, last I heard was making MDMA in the lab as well. Live it up while you can man, pretty soon you'll have far greater controls over you.

I'd love to try MDMA...and not have to worry about job security.</i>

You don't have to worry about drug tests or job security with MDMA, it's out of your system in 2 - 5 days unless they do hair follicle testing, then it's 90 days.
In all honesty 10 years in a security position and I got tested twice, the first time was at hire. The second time my boss gave me 3 days warning, other than
cops I don't know anyone who gets tested regularly.


It isn't the chemical test I'm concerned about, it's the "have you ever done illegal drugs" that if you lie about, is a federal offense punishable by 7 years in prison and verifiable via polygraph.
 
2013-01-21 09:28:59 PM

Bondith: semiotix: Yes, it is kind of that a state drug tester might end up addicted to drugs. But I could also see how someone with no interest in taking drugs might end up in that job. The qualifications to be a drug tester are, what, a master's in organic chemistry or some such? So nobody trains specifically to get that job.

I dunno about this particular field, but in general an analytical tech requires a B.Sc. at most, and even then you're kinda over-qualified if you're not the manager. A grunt tech in an environmental lab doing routine analyses can get by on an Associate's degree.


Since this is a state drug lab and they will probably be testifying in court on test results, I think most places want a B.Sc as a starting point then specialized training on the equipment and testing methods that the labs usually give. Gotta make them sound highly educated and authoritative to a jury so they believe the results they are saying. Sure they can do the job with an Associates, but it just doesn't sound as good in court and in this economy, they can usually hold out for the B.Sci candidates.
 
2013-01-21 10:28:00 PM
It happens in police departments every day.
 
2013-01-21 10:51:59 PM

Daedalus27: Since this is a state drug lab and they will probably be testifying in court on test results, I think most places want a B.Sc as a starting point then specialized training on the equipment and testing methods that the labs usually give. Gotta make them sound highly educated and authoritative to a jury so they believe the results they are saying. Sure they can do the job with an Associates, but it just doesn't sound as good in court and in this economy, they can usually hold out for the B.Sci candidates.


Yeah, I'll buy that. Crime labs aren't really in the same league as environmental labs.

/Dad wanted me to apply for the RCMP analytical lab because "that's where the money is
//never mind that every single analysis I did would get thrown out because I'd farked it up somehow, and the 8 month coop term I did in an environmental lab was sheer drudgery.
 
2013-01-22 03:42:54 AM
FTFA: The state's district attorneys in a joint statement said last night the Dookhan scandal alone has strained their resources, diverting prosecutors.

"Not only have the governor and Legislature not acted to give the DAs relief with these extraordinary efforts, but prosecutors statewide are now presented with the possibility of unrealistic, unfair and unacceptable mid-year budget cuts," the DAs' statement said.


Don't miss the fact that this is all part of a money-grab by the prosecutors' offices.
 
2013-01-22 04:02:02 AM

the8re: FTFA: The state's district attorneys in a joint statement said last night the Dookhan scandal alone has strained their resources, diverting prosecutors.

"Not only have the governor and Legislature not acted to give the DAs relief with these extraordinary efforts, but prosecutors statewide are now presented with the possibility of unrealistic, unfair and unacceptable mid-year budget cuts," the DAs' statement said.

Don't miss the fact that this is all part of a money-grab by the prosecutors' offices.


Uh, in case you didn't know, the first scandel affects thousands of potential convictions that have to be reviewed, argued, and potentially retried. This scandel can effect many more cases. So on top of their present workload (which has generally increased due to previous cuts due to the poor economy), there are many years worth of previous cases that have to be address and they are cutting the budget.

I don't know about your state but courts and prosecutors offices are getting cutting at the expense of cops on the street. However, what good are cops catching criminals if there are no prosecutors and public defenders to handle the cases and courts are overcrowded and simply can't handle the workload. Cuts are not seen by many at first, but as more pleas have to be taken or minor cases shoved aside leading to further criminal acts, people gradually see that the streets are less safe. If you are worried about crime, then the whole system from police, to prosecutors, to the courts that hear cases must be adequately funded. Presently, I think many jursidictions would argue that they are barely functioning.
 
2013-01-22 09:06:57 AM

FunkOut: LarryDan43: Headline is lacking, "smoking hot".

I'm frequently being surprised these days by seeing pictures of people and finding out they are at least 10 years younger than their face looks.


You sound 40.
 
2013-01-22 01:42:17 PM

Znuh: Goooooooo NoHo! Western MA is a whole different font of weird.

/Former resident

[theawesomeboston.com image 720x480]


So, I was and am a pretentious person.
/Brookline...
 
Displayed 46 of 46 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report