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(Chicago Trib)   Will Chief Justice Roberts accidentally recite his grocery list? Will Joe ride down Pennsylvania Avenue standing up barechested through a moonroof? Will Mitch McConnell ever emerge from his shell? Its your official Obama Second Inaugural FARK Thread   (chicagotribune.com) divider line 850
    More: Spiffy, Pennsylvania Avenue, Mitch McConnell, District of Columbia, obama, McConnell v. FEC, oath of office, presidential inauguration, bulletproof glass  
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1832 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Jan 2013 at 11:37 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-01-21 09:46:02 AM
No, Maybe, too busy selling out the country for his own ends.
 
2013-01-21 09:46:16 AM
The end in near...
 
2013-01-21 09:46:57 AM
*is

/fark
 
2013-01-21 09:48:06 AM
I think he said the president is near.
 
2013-01-21 09:48:32 AM
Am I the only person who really doesn't care about the inauguration ceremonies?

I'd be more impressed if Obama just came out and said "Look, I'm President, not king. There will be no parade. I will hold a short ceremony at the WH and give a short speech."
 
2013-01-21 09:48:38 AM
Well, we can kiss our guns and more of our civil liberties goodbye.
 
2013-01-21 09:48:59 AM
And not a single fark was given that day.
 
2013-01-21 09:49:20 AM
Best part about it?  None of these freaks are getting sworn in.

colorlines.com
 
2013-01-21 09:49:27 AM
O.k. Obama haters...Don't be so shy, wear it on your sleeves whydontcha.

IMHO it didn't really matter who won, either way we were already farked.
 
2013-01-21 09:49:33 AM
It's hard for me to process a ceremonial event as "news". I guess if you like the pomp and circumstance, you can watch it on the teevee.
 
2013-01-21 09:49:55 AM
Is Clarence Thomas going to nap through the whole thing, just like four years ago?
 
2013-01-21 09:50:15 AM

Endive Wombat: Well, we can kiss our guns and more of our civil liberties goodbye.


1/10
 
2013-01-21 09:50:27 AM
I'd be more impressed if Obama wasn't the one being inaugurated.
 
2013-01-21 09:50:56 AM

Endive Wombat: Well, we can kiss our guns and more of our civil liberties goodbye.


Give your gun a blowjob while yanking on the trigger, please.
 
2013-01-21 09:51:19 AM

Endive Wombat: Well, we can kiss our guns and more of our civil liberties goodbye.


Try not to blow your fool head off when you're kissing them guns goodbye.
 
2013-01-21 09:53:04 AM
Chief Justice Roberts accidentally recited his grocery list during the Inauguration today. As a result, constitutional experts agree that Cottonelle is now King of the South, Broccoli has the right to secede from the Union, and the President of the United States is now a jar of dill pickles (not the garlicky kind).

The First Lady, a jar of Lady Ashburham mustard pickles, was unavailable for comment. It is believed that the Vice President is now a bag of McCain frozen french fries, the first time a VP has been French since Richard de Chêney about a million years ago, under President Georges WC Bouché.
 
2013-01-21 09:53:09 AM
my excitement level is way down since the first one. better him than any of the clowns  clancifer posted but that's damning with faint praise.
 
2013-01-21 09:54:25 AM
it's really starting to fill up... people everywhere. everyone is pushy, loud, and generally annoying. the porto-pottys stink to high heaven, but at least the near-freezing temperatures keep them from stewing and really sending a haze of human waste over the air. the vendors are out peddling their t-shirts and hot dogs. the spicy kielbasas are better, but not when the prices are noticeably jacked way up.

at least, that's what i assume is happening. i'm sitting in the comfort of my home hundreds of miles away.
 
2013-01-21 09:54:29 AM

Endive Wombat: Well, we can kiss our guns and more of our civil liberties goodbye.


Cry moar.
 
2013-01-21 09:54:54 AM

Endive Wombat: Well, we can kiss our guns and more of our civil liberties goodbye.


I know.  We're totally heading into a thousand years of darkness today.

Next, you'll be forced to gay marry an immigrant.

I weep for your future.  It's...

I can't go on.
 
2013-01-21 09:55:40 AM
Take a douche and calm down.
 
2013-01-21 09:55:48 AM
if only we lived in a country where those who were so unhappy with their leadership had means to effect change.

if only...

/more of us like the guy than those of you who don't
//mittens
 
2013-01-21 09:57:03 AM

Endive Wombat: Well, we can kiss our guns and more of our civil liberties goodbye.

i47.photobucket.com
 
2013-01-21 09:57:20 AM
I would love it if he decided to troll the country by including something special in his inauguration speech today..

"My fellow Americans, for too long, we've suffered endless tragedy and suffering due to these horribly regulated tools of chaos and sorrow. For too long, we've endured the unendurable and paid the price in the name of 'security' and 'safety'. Well, today, I say to you all. Enough is enough."

"Which is why, my first act in my second term as your President, I am announcing that I will order the dismantling of the TSA."
 
2013-01-21 09:57:44 AM

Endive Wombat: Well, we can kiss our guns and more of our civil liberties goodbye.


LOL @ you
 
2013-01-21 10:00:02 AM

Infernalist: I would love it if he decided to troll the country by including something special in his inauguration speech today..

"My fellow Americans, for too long, we've suffered endless tragedy and suffering due to these horribly regulated tools of chaos and sorrow. For too long, we've endured the unendurable and paid the price in the name of 'security' and 'safety'. Well, today, I say to you all. Enough is enough."

"Which is why, my first act in my second term as your President, I am announcing that I will order the dismantling of the TSA."


I don't think that would be a troll.  I think pretty much all of America would throw a party if he disbanded the TSA.

Now, declaring the GOP to be enemy combatants seeking to destroy America and the promise of freedom would be how I'd do it.
 
2013-01-21 10:01:17 AM
Holy crap! Obama was reelected? What else did I miss?
 
2013-01-21 10:01:35 AM
I did it!
 
2013-01-21 10:02:01 AM
All I want to say is that I think Dr. King would be proud.  Racial equality?  Well, no but it's a pretty epic moment in black history.

Now it's irrelevant, and that's the best part.  Henceforth, any black person can run for any public office and it won't be seen as monumental.  For that reason alone, I hope that our next POTUS is female, so we can get past that milestone as well.So if you take politics completely out of it, nevermind if you agree with his politics or not, I'm just a bit proud of my country for proving that we could elect a minority President.
 
2013-01-21 10:02:42 AM

TDBoedy: No, Maybe, too busy selling out the country for his own ends.


Aaaand derpshiatted in one.
 
2013-01-21 10:03:12 AM

clancifer: Best part about it?  None of these freaks are getting sworn in.

[colorlines.com image 640x394]


This would be derpier if they replaced Huntsman with Gingrich.
 
2013-01-21 10:05:23 AM

Catlenfell: Holy crap! Obama was reelected? What else did I miss?


Apparently, there was a Britney Spear's sideboob.  ::shrug::
 
2013-01-21 10:06:26 AM

nekom: All I want to say is that I think Dr. King would be proud.  Racial equality?  Well, no but it's a pretty epic moment in black history.

Now it's irrelevant, and that's the best part.  Henceforth, any black person can run for any public office and it won't be seen as monumental.  For that reason alone, I hope that our next POTUS is female, so we can get past that milestone as well.So if you take politics completely out of it, nevermind if you agree with his politics or not, I'm just a bit proud of my country for proving that we could elect a minority President.


Oh now, you know it won't end there. Now we have to have a Hispanic President. And an Asian President.

And a gay President!

You see? Do you see why those valiant white men held the line for so long? Because once you give ONE minority a chance at the seat, they're all going to want a turn and then it's just chaos. Before you know it, some albino bisexual midget with glaucoma will be wanting a turn in the seat as the last recognized minority: Disabled white/black gay/straight height challenged Americans, stand tall and proud!
 
2013-01-21 10:07:23 AM
I made caramels that rolled in walnuts and dipped in chocolate.
 
2013-01-21 10:08:19 AM
blessthe40oz.com
 
2013-01-21 10:10:05 AM

clancifer: Best part about it?  None of these freaks are getting sworn in.

[colorlines.com image 640x394]


To e fair, Mitt was not a freak. Just an asshole.
 
2013-01-21 10:10:29 AM

Endive Wombat: Well, we can kiss our guns and more of our civil liberties goodbye.


you can, I intend to live in reality the next 4 years.

/remember, clean the gun by placing your finger on the trigger and pointing the barrel at your face. Proper cleaning of guns is essential to their safe use and should be done every day.
 
2013-01-21 10:11:12 AM

Vodka Zombie: Infernalist: I would love it if he decided to troll the country by including something special in his inauguration speech today..

"My fellow Americans, for too long, we've suffered endless tragedy and suffering due to these horribly regulated tools of chaos and sorrow. For too long, we've endured the unendurable and paid the price in the name of 'security' and 'safety'. Well, today, I say to you all. Enough is enough."

"Which is why, my first act in my second term as your President, I am announcing that I will order the dismantling of the TSA."

I don't think that would be a troll.  I think pretty much all of America would throw a party if he disbanded the TSA.

Now, declaring the GOP to be enemy combatants seeking to destroy America and the promise of freedom would be how I'd do it.


It would also be acceptable to simply laugh maniacally for a couple of minutes before wrapping himself in a black cape and slinking off the podium.
 
2013-01-21 10:12:07 AM

deanis: Endive Wombat: Well, we can kiss our guns and more of our civil liberties goodbye.

1/10


generous.
 
2013-01-21 10:12:24 AM

dickfreckle: clancifer: Best part about it?  None of these freaks are getting sworn in.

[colorlines.com image 640x394]

To e fair, Mitt was not a freak. Just an asshole.


He's Mormon.

That's pretty freaky to a lot of people.
 
2013-01-21 10:12:35 AM

MadCat221: TDBoedy: No, Maybe, too busy selling out the country for his own ends.

Aaaand derpshiatted in one.


you don't think McConnel is selling out the country?  the man who said the number one goal of the GOP was to make Obama a one term president?  he kind of failed at that.
 
2013-01-21 10:13:44 AM
Only 4 more years of this shiathead. Tell me, why do we need an inauguration, when he is already the president?
 
2013-01-21 10:14:57 AM

odinsposse: Vodka Zombie: Infernalist: I would love it if he decided to troll the country by including something special in his inauguration speech today..

"My fellow Americans, for too long, we've suffered endless tragedy and suffering due to these horribly regulated tools of chaos and sorrow. For too long, we've endured the unendurable and paid the price in the name of 'security' and 'safety'. Well, today, I say to you all. Enough is enough."

"Which is why, my first act in my second term as your President, I am announcing that I will order the dismantling of the TSA."

I don't think that would be a troll.  I think pretty much all of America would throw a party if he disbanded the TSA.

Now, declaring the GOP to be enemy combatants seeking to destroy America and the promise of freedom would be how I'd do it.

It would also be acceptable to simply laugh maniacally for a couple of minutes before wrapping himself in a black cape and slinking off the podium.


Remember Cheney at the first one?
kirkkittell.com

Dude just needed a hairless cat on his lap to complete the look.
 
2013-01-21 10:16:01 AM
I bet Obama says "MONDALE" at least once.

/ or misreads the TelePrompTer

// I keed, I keed
 
2013-01-21 10:16:33 AM

NeoBad: Only 4 more years of this shiathead. Tell me, why do we need an inauguration, when he is already the president?


You should maybe read the this country's Constitution sometime.  It might be kind of eye opening.
 
2013-01-21 10:17:56 AM
Judging by the commercials so far it's mostly fat women tuning in.
 
2013-01-21 10:19:05 AM

Infernalist: I would love it if he decided to troll the country by including something special in his inauguration speech today..

"My fellow Americans, for too long, we've suffered endless tragedy and suffering due to these horribly regulated tools of chaos and sorrow. For too long, we've endured the unendurable and paid the price in the name of 'security' and 'safety'. Well, today, I say to you all. Enough is enough."

"Which is why, my first act in my second term as your President, I am announcing that I will order the dismantling of the TSA Republican party, we begin bombing in five minutes."


No?
 
2013-01-21 10:19:19 AM

NeoBad: Only 4 more years of this shiathead. Tell me, why do we need an inauguration, when he is already the president?


you mean the same way we had to have a second one for Reagan and Clinton and Bush Jr and every other two term president ever?
 
2013-01-21 10:19:56 AM

NeoBad: Only 4 more years of this shiathead. Tell me, why do we need an inauguration, when he is already the president?


Oh, is "being inaugurated again" on the list of things that were fine for other presidents but aren't okay for Barack Obama? I missed the memo
 
2013-01-21 10:20:01 AM

NeoBad: Only 4 more years of this shiathead. Tell me, why do we need an inauguration, when he is already the president?


Yes, but after him comes Uncle Joe. And then Elizabeth Warren or Corey Booker.

The core of the GOP is dying off. Literally. And their efforts to appeal to the same people that they've demonized for the last 4 years have not just failed, but failed miserably 'and' pissed off their core group of 'old scared white men'.

The GOP is dying. And even if it survives, it won't survive in any form that you'd recognize.

Happy MLK Day.
 
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