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(Salon)   Be wary, Farkers: a self-inflicted orgasm could result in a brain hemorrhage   (salon.com) divider line 23
    More: PSA, cerebral hemorrhages, CT scans  
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11672 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Jan 2013 at 4:28 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-01-20 05:32:08 AM  
4 votes:
But what, an orgasm inflicted by someone else is free of danger?

If you're at risk for aneurism, ANY orgasm is risky, so I'm just going to take my chances and go out happy. Better my vibrator be the culprit than some guy have to deal with f*cking me to death, you know?
2013-01-20 06:43:19 AM  
2 votes:
Not often I get to bust out this goody.

i451.photobucket.com
2013-01-20 05:47:42 AM  
2 votes:

belhade: Gyrfalcon: But what, an orgasm inflicted by someone else is free of danger?

If you're at risk for aneurism, ANY orgasm is risky, so I'm just going to take my chances and go out happy. Better my vibrator be the culprit than some guy have to deal with f*cking me to death, you know?

You wouldn't want to make any guy's ego that big.


Why not? I won't be around to listen to him.
2013-01-20 05:07:14 AM  
2 votes:
FTA: "The (arteriovenous malformation) hemorrhage was going to happen someday - turns out today was the day."

So that headline should actually say ". . . if you have a certain congenital disease."
2013-01-20 04:39:54 AM  
2 votes:
www.incrediblethings.com
2013-01-20 07:28:10 AM  
1 votes:
i think that you can decide how good of a person you are by how long you waited until after september 11th before you masturbated. for me, it was between the two buildings going down. i had to do it, i was thinking that if i don't, then the terrorists win. it was a strange time for all of us. and i know that the rest of you probably waited a whole week or something, because you're better than me, but i just couldn't wait that long.

/paraphrased from louis ck
2013-01-20 06:58:49 AM  
1 votes:

SDRR: publikenemy: This happens sorta quite often unfortunately according to my wife who works in pathology. A couple weeks ago a guy, father of 3, was found in his room on the floor with the porn still playing on the computer. There was a toilet brush handle protruding from his ass...DRT...dead right there.

Autopsy showed he had taken most of the brush end off and put a condom over that end and was furiously trying to come to a conclusion. When he hemmoraged he must have fallen on his ass. The brush end ram forced its way in farther. The condom came off and was unbelievably found in his lung.
/stories I have
//always a man

Dude, please refrain from sharing any more stories of this nature.

kthanxbi



Once a month on average, she'll get a container labeled "foreign body, rectum"

Sometimes the container is still vibrating.

Sometimes it's just an IED

No, not explosive device..exploratory device..though I guess IMD would work too..improvised masturbatory device..

..because its usually something cone shaped to aid in exploring, so to speak, but one time it was a pair of salad tongs. Since the guys excuse for the tongs was that he was constipated, I think IED works best


/always a man
2013-01-20 05:18:31 AM  
1 votes:
There was a time in my life that I did not masturbate for 15 years.... then I turned 16.
2013-01-20 05:17:40 AM  
1 votes:
I've flirted with this danger at least 8,400ish times. Maybe a few more, maybe a few less. Assuming an average of once a day for about the last 23ish years.

I figure when I hit 10k I can go ahead and kill myself.
2013-01-20 05:16:28 AM  
1 votes:
This place would be a freaking ghost town.
2013-01-20 05:15:02 AM  
1 votes:

zamboni: They can have my penis when they pry it out of my cold dead hands.


We'll just do closed casket for you, okay?

but with a little window over your face so people can ask, "I wonder how they got him to smile like that..."
2013-01-20 05:07:18 AM  
1 votes:
They can have my penis when they pry it out of my cold dead hands.
2013-01-20 05:07:17 AM  
1 votes:

publikenemy: This happens sorta quite often unfortunately according to my wife who works in pathology. A couple weeks ago a guy, father of 3, was found in his room on the floor with the porn still playing on the computer. There was a toilet brush handle protruding from his ass...DRT...dead right there.

Autopsy showed he had taken most of the brush end off and put a condom over that end and was furiously trying to come to a conclusion. When he hemmoraged he must have fallen on his ass. The brush end ram forced its way in farther. The condom came off and was unbelievably found in his lung.
/stories I have
//always a man


Why do people always improvise with weird household items? They make things for that. Even things that make you look like you have a tail.
2013-01-20 05:03:31 AM  
1 votes:

RollingThunder: Having spent most of a day in the ER two weeks ago after suffering a brutal attack of coital headache, I'm really not getting a kick out of this.

Luckily mine wasn't a hemorrhage (that they can see), but god damn does it suck. Worried as hell now every time the wife and I start to get busy, and I've had to say "No, stop NOW" twice when I felt a headache starting to build.


That is just awful and proof that god hates you.
2013-01-20 04:49:09 AM  
1 votes:
Dead man wanking.....
2013-01-20 04:48:53 AM  
1 votes:
1. Its a random person i know nothing about .... I dont care

2. Its a guy... Not interested in his self-pleasure habits

3. Even if it affects this guy, The benefits of onanism outweigh the reported problems by a factor of millions-to-one
2013-01-20 04:47:43 AM  
1 votes:
Pretty sure that the blood vessels in farkers heads would be lead pipe strong after persistent strengthening.
2013-01-20 04:44:56 AM  
1 votes:
Having spent most of a day in the ER two weeks ago after suffering a brutal attack of coital headache, I'm really not getting a kick out of this.

Luckily mine wasn't a hemorrhage (that they can see), but god damn does it suck. Worried as hell now every time the wife and I start to get busy, and I've had to say "No, stop NOW" twice when I felt a headache starting to build.
2013-01-20 04:36:24 AM  
1 votes:
I not only call shenanigans on this story, but I want to call in a napalm air strike on the the author's house as well as the offices of Salon.com for daring to put forth some bullsh*t story that over-frightened soccer moms will no doubt use to turn their little Chads and Billy's into involuntary eunuchs.
2013-01-20 03:12:49 AM  
1 votes:

fusillade762: Masturbating on your older brother's wedding day is perverted, isn't it?

No.


However, masturbating on your older sister's wedding day while watching her get ready is a little perverted.
2013-01-20 01:38:58 AM  
1 votes:
Oh, bullshiGAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHhhhh........................
2013-01-20 01:36:27 AM  
1 votes:
That's how I hope to go.
2013-01-20 01:27:44 AM  
1 votes:
Masturbating on your older brother's wedding day is perverted, isn't it?

No.
 
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