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(Chicagoist)   Chicago's O'Hare airport to offer tiny rooms by the hour for sleeping, but not sex. Subby will just keep cruising the bathrooms for that   (chicagoist.com) divider line 72
    More: Unlikely, Chicago's O'Hare, O'Hare Airport, NBC Chicago, Chicago, flight delay, Mile High Club  
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6656 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Jan 2013 at 5:22 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-01-19 04:50:07 PM
"People come to us with that comment," [said Philadelphia International Airport Supervisor Ronnie Gross], "but people don't pay for that." She also added, "When you have a five-hour lay-over between flights, the first thing you think about is sleep, getting some food or souvenirs and getting some work done."

Chicago's mayoral spokesman, Tom Alexander, sent an email to the  Sun-Times stating, "We have a large law enforcement presence at the airport, which helps us maintain a safe environment for all travelers. We will work diligently in preventing illegal behavior, as we do throughout the airport."


I don't see anything in there that would prevent me and Mrs. Isonomia from having some fun on the road - of course, I'm not up on my city ordinances for Chicago... plus renting the space might include a "no farking" clause... still, the soundproof walls implies the developer was taking loud farking into mind...
 
2013-01-19 05:07:34 PM
Approves:

bloximages.chicago2.vip.townnews.com
 
2013-01-19 05:24:41 PM
I'm sure this won't go awry at *all.*
 
2013-01-19 05:26:17 PM
Chicago's mayoral spokesman, Tom Alexander, sent an email to the Sun-Times stating, "We have a large law enforcement presence at the airport, which helps us maintain a safe environment for all travelers. We will work diligently in preventing illegal behavior, as we do throughout the airport."

Wait... now farking is illegal? What the hell.
 
2013-01-19 05:26:27 PM
I don't know why more airports don't do this.
 
2013-01-19 05:27:15 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: I'm sure this won't go awry at *all.*


shiat, I would've killed for one these things on some of my work trips. Being able to lie down on something soft without the fear of some asshole running off with one of my work files would be a godsend.
 
2013-01-19 05:27:52 PM

DaMoGan: Chicago's mayoral spokesman, Tom Alexander, sent an email to the Sun-Times stating, "We have a large law enforcement presence at the airport, which helps us maintain a safe environment for all travelers. We will work diligently in preventing illegal behavior, as we do throughout the airport."

Wait... now farking is illegal? What the hell.


My guess is prostitution, but that's just me.
 
2013-01-19 05:28:28 PM
ewe...if they keep up the rooms as well as they keep up the rest of ohare, no thanks
 
2013-01-19 05:30:24 PM
I'd love to see just how they'd conceivably prevent people from scootilypooping in those rooms. Cameras? Guards? Yeah good luck with that. I mean, doesn't hotel space that charges by the hour pretty much already imply 'love hotel'?

Heh heh...scootilypooping.
 
2013-01-19 05:32:08 PM
Subby is a foot tapper. Ewwww
 
2013-01-19 05:32:36 PM
You can't stop me from having sex in a small room Chicago fascists.

/it still counts if its just me right?
 
2013-01-19 05:32:42 PM

Solon Isonomia: shiat, I would've killed for one these things on some of my work trips. Being able to lie down on something soft without the fear of some asshole running off with one of my work files would be a godsend.


I hear that.

I'm just saying that someone will likely find a way to screw this up for everyone else. Way of the universe, as it were.
 
2013-01-19 05:36:58 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Solon Isonomia: shiat, I would've killed for one these things on some of my work trips. Being able to lie down on something soft without the fear of some asshole running off with one of my work files would be a godsend.

I hear that.

I'm just saying that someone will likely find a way to screw this up for everyone else. Way of the universe, as it were.


Well, if I was single and in the shape I was when I was single, I'm sure I'd be ruining for everyone by trying to have copious amounts of road sex.. won't be my fault if it goes wrong.
 
2013-01-19 05:37:17 PM

DaMoGan: Chicago's mayoral spokesman, Tom Alexander, sent an email to the Sun-Times stating, "We have a large law enforcement presence at the airport, which helps us maintain a safe environment for all travelers. We will work diligently in preventing illegal behavior, as we do throughout the airport."

Wait... now farking is illegal? What the hell.


Welcome to America.
 
2013-01-19 05:38:42 PM
Every month or so I stay in the little cubes at Yotel in Heathrow or Gatwick usually the night before my morning trans Atlantic flight or to recover when I land. It's farking brilliant, but would suggest splurging for the premium room. Link
 
2013-01-19 05:41:28 PM

Mark Ratner: Subby is a foot tapper. Ewwww


Naw, he just has a naturally wide stance.
 
2013-01-19 05:42:30 PM
 
2013-01-19 05:42:40 PM
I really wish they would let me set up a smokers lounge, where I could charge customers to come on in and puff away.
If I could get one in every airport.......hummmmm
 
2013-01-19 05:43:35 PM

Solon Isonomia: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Solon Isonomia: shiat, I would've killed for one these things on some of my work trips. Being able to lie down on something soft without the fear of some asshole running off with one of my work files would be a godsend.

I hear that.

I'm just saying that someone will likely find a way to screw this up for everyone else. Way of the universe, as it were.

Well, if I was single and in the shape I was when I was single, I'm sure I'd be ruining for everyone by trying to have copious amounts of road sex.. won't be my fault if it goes wrong.


That sounds painful. Though, maybe with a freshly laid asphalt road, or lots of lube...
 
2013-01-19 05:46:00 PM
I love NBC Chicago!


"NBC Chicago winks and nudges:"
 
2013-01-19 05:46:47 PM
Wide Stance.
 
2013-01-19 05:52:41 PM
Henry Case nods approvingly.
 
2013-01-19 05:55:56 PM
I've felt that 24 hour restaurants like Denny's and iHop should have sleep tubes.

Drunks stumble in. They're hungry so they have 2AM dinner. They're wasted and tired so they rent a sleep tube. Then they wake up and they're hungry and hungover so they get breakfast and coffee
 
2013-01-19 05:58:43 PM
Subby will just keep cruising the bathrooms for that

How nice of you, Senatormitter.
 
2013-01-19 06:01:54 PM
These are a great idea, and not just for airports. Hell, at $120/night, the price point is actually about right for a Chicago airport hotel, which is more than I can say for the actual Chicago airport hotel, most nights.

When I'm evaluating a travel hotel--i.e., the thing that's en route to the place I'm going, not the place I'm going to be living for a few days--these are my criteria.

1) Will I step on any drug needles or murder weapons between my car and my room?
2) Is there clear and incontrovertible evidence of someone else's bodily fluids?
3) Will I die of toxic mold exposure and/or hypothermia before I make it to checkout?
4) Is it expensive?

Most of the motels that satisfy 1-3 fail 4. But everything I need in a motel room (bed, toilet, shower) can be taken care of in 60 sq. feet, and that's without being clever. Four times the occupancy in the same footprint. With the money you'd save on real estate and furnishings, you could charge "drifter motel" prices in the "right-by-the-fancy-part-of-town-where-the-interstates-cross" district.

Get on it, Hotel Management majors.
 
2013-01-19 06:03:07 PM
So, like everything else in the airport, they will be overpriced? So i could expect to pay the same price as a suite at the Wynn for a broom closet with a cot?
 
2013-01-19 06:04:52 PM
"At 62 square feet they are tiny, but people have lived in less."

And with rooms that have sound-masking systems, that allow for 'the perfect cathartic scream session', people have gotten away with it in crazier places.
 
2013-01-19 06:06:54 PM
from the article
"People come to us with that comment," [said Philadelphia International Airport Supervisor Ronnie Gross], "but people don't pay for that." She also added, "When you have a five-hour lay-over between flights, the first thing you think about is sleep, getting some food or souvenirs and getting some work done."

well--do you call a quickie with a stranger a souvenir???

if so, you're set.
 
2013-01-19 06:12:03 PM

DaMoGan: Chicago's mayoral spokesman, Tom Alexander, sent an email to the Sun-Times stating, "We have a large law enforcement presence at the airport, which helps us maintain a safe environment for all travelers. We will work diligently in preventing illegal behavior, as we do throughout the airport."

Wait... now farking is illegal? What the hell.


Eh, just red state farkers trying to legislate morality. Business as usual.
 
2013-01-19 06:15:00 PM
FTA: "When you have a five-hour lay-over between flights, the first thing you think about is sleep, getting some food or souvenirs and getting some work done."

Souvenirs? In a lay-over airport?

How about alternate travel arrangements, food, electrical outlets to charge up my stuff, and maybe sleep. The downside of traveling alone is you can't find a place to camp out and have other people you know watch your stuff while you forage or use the restroom that one last time before you board.
 
2013-01-19 06:16:58 PM
$30 an hour/$120 a night? I'll sleep on those crappy airport chairs, thank you. Many of their potential customers are unlucky souls saddled with delays or getting bumped due to overbooking. Gouging them for more money is lame.

I'd love to see capsule hotels at airports, with well maintained communal bathroom and shower facilities.
 
2013-01-19 06:17:39 PM

johndalek: well--do you call a quickie with a stranger a souvenir???


I call my second daughter "Daddy's Little Souvenir".
 
2013-01-19 06:19:16 PM

johndalek: from the article
"People come to us with that comment," [said Philadelphia International Airport Supervisor Ronnie Gross], "but people don't pay for that." She also added, "When you have a five-hour lay-over between flights, the first thing you think about is sleep, getting some food or souvenirs and getting some work done."

well--do you call a quickie with a stranger a souvenir???

if so, you're set.


I call it "getting some work done".
 
2013-01-19 06:20:25 PM
In cali last I checked the only place you could smoke indoors is in cigar shops. Could open one of those maybe?

Flying delta nyc to sf years ago thru atlanta was a relief, they had a smoking room. Dunno if they do that anymore.
 
2013-01-19 06:22:43 PM
Carousel Beast:
DaMoGan: Chicago's mayoral spokesman, Tom Alexander, sent an email to the Sun-Times stating, "We have a large law enforcement presence at the airport, which helps us maintain a safe environment for all travelers. We will work diligently in preventing illegal behavior, as we do throughout the airport."

Wait... now farking is illegal? What the hell.

"Eh, just red state farkers trying to legislate morality. Business as usual."

Yes, because chicago is so republican...
 
2013-01-19 06:23:37 PM
They have them in the Atlanta airport. I don't think there have been any problems with them.

When has Chicago been considered 'red state' material?
 
2013-01-19 06:24:17 PM
That Weeners I made was to cig-man.
 
2013-01-19 06:26:32 PM
Hehe weeners.

Hourly hotels are one of my favorite things about layovers in asia. Some napping, some boning, a shower, change clothes.

One I stayed in in korea had mirrors on the ceiling. Good times.
 
2013-01-19 06:28:50 PM
Nice article - why is it SO hard to have the company in question send you a standard PR photo to include with story? Other than "Can I get laid in it" the next question most people would have had was "62 square feet... How bad could it be?"
 
2013-01-19 06:30:22 PM
But the airlines are still allowed to fark you at the airport.
 
2013-01-19 06:36:23 PM

o'really: Hehe weeners.

Hourly hotels are one of my favorite things about layovers in asia. Some napping, some boning, a shower, change clothes.

One I stayed in in korea had mirrors on the ceiling. Good times.


Schiphol has those, too. I have no idea what they're like though.

Foxxinnia: I've felt that 24 hour restaurants like Denny's and iHop should have sleep tubes.

Drunks stumble in. They're hungry so they have 2AM dinner. They're wasted and tired so they rent a sleep tube. Then they wake up and they're hungry and hungover so they get breakfast and coffee


But how do you get them to leave?
 
2013-01-19 06:42:55 PM

Cerberus: $30 an hour/$120 a night? I'll sleep on those crappy airport chairs, thank you. Many of their potential customers are unlucky souls saddled with delays or getting bumped due to overbooking. Gouging them for more money is lame.

I'd love to see capsule hotels at airports, with well maintained communal bathroom and shower facilities.


I dunno...figure a decent room ANYWHERE is going to cost you north of $75 a night, and when you add in your taxi fare to get to said room, it seems to me you're at least breaking even.
 
2013-01-19 07:03:09 PM
For the designers of this plan without a flair for the obvious: people sleep on the ground, on uncomfortable seats, and anywhere carpeted to avoid having to pay $120 a night for a room in a hotel- regardless if they could afford it or not. Why not price small cubicle like bunks in the range of $5- $10 an hour (single or double occupancy) and $50 nightly.

por.habitants.org
 
2013-01-19 07:30:06 PM
Wish they'd had these a couple of years ago when my parents got stuck overnight at O'Hare due to a thunderstorm. Of course since the nearby hotels were already full they probably wouldn't have gotten one of these either.

Speaking of which, when I lived in SF my parents, who fly out of a small regional airport, always had a layover in at O'Hare. Tickets were about $300 round trip. Now O'Hare is my closest airport and direct flights to my parents are about $700 or $300 with one stop. Damn airlines...

Me? I'd be happy with one of those coffin-like capsules for a few bucks an hour. I'd pay for privacy and an outlet during a layover in between the bits of air travel that involve being smashed up against strangers.
 
2013-01-19 07:35:22 PM
If the rooms create a reasonable expectation of privacy, then farking is not illegal no matter what they say. There is a right to liberty. If you get caught having sex, your venue wasn't private enough. The charge would probably be disorderly conduct.
 
2013-01-19 07:36:29 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: I'm sure this won't go awry at *all.*


Nah, never happen.

*PFT*
 
2013-01-19 07:39:27 PM
According to "not gay" republicans , it is not gay sex if it is in an airport bathroom, so subby must be "not gay"
 
2013-01-19 07:40:06 PM
What they don't tell you is that it's also 62 cubic feet.
 
2013-01-19 07:42:38 PM

clowncar on fire: For the designers of this plan without a flair for the obvious: people sleep on the ground, on uncomfortable seats, and anywhere carpeted to avoid having to pay $120 a night for a room in a hotel- regardless if they could afford it or not. Why not price small cubicle like bunks in the range of $5- $10 an hour (single or double occupancy) and $50 nightly.

[por.habitants.org image 600x400]


Rent your coffin by the HOUR!
 
2013-01-19 07:42:59 PM

Nem Wan: If the rooms create a reasonable expectation of privacy, then farking is not illegal no matter what they say. There is a right to liberty. If you get caught having sex, your venue wasn't private enough. The charge would probably be disorderly conduct.


Unless the license/lease to use the space specifies no sex - one can be kicked out for violating the terms.
 
2013-01-19 07:50:46 PM
Came here for the capsule hotels, left satisfied...

i.dailymail.co.uk
 
2013-01-19 08:06:03 PM
Subby. meet me in the restrooms by Concourse D, Gate 16 in 30 mins. Third stall from the left.
 
2013-01-19 08:26:36 PM

clowncar on fire: For the designers of this plan without a flair for the obvious: people sleep on the ground, on uncomfortable seats, and anywhere carpeted to avoid having to pay $120 a night for a room in a hotel- regardless if they could afford it or not. Why not price small cubicle like bunks in the range of $5- $10 an hour (single or double occupancy) and $50 nightly.

[por.habitants.org image 600x400]


THIS. I'd love to have this sort of thing in more places (since life is only getting busier), but $30 an hour/$120 a night is ridiculous. Your price plan is doable.

/Not that I'm flying anytime soon, but hey
 
2013-01-19 08:57:43 PM
I....Ummm... But the extra monies... with the drinks.... And ummm...

Aw, shiat do I have to pay for their luggage now? Vodka was way easier and more lucrative.
 
2013-01-19 09:17:24 PM
Like everything at O'hare, the pricing is stupid expensive. Actually it's worse because you can get a regular room with King sized bed in the Hilton right there for $120-150 depending on the night, at least if you book more than a day ahead. $30 for only one hour in a coffin is worthless, so if you have at least 3-4 hours just get a real room. If you only have a couple hours, get one of those headbag personal space things and put biohazard stickers on your stuff.
 
2013-01-19 09:46:50 PM
stiletto_the_wise

The guy in the Ann B. Davis spot there...his balls are showing.
 
2013-01-19 09:57:44 PM
I'd be willing to pay a few bucks an hour for a secure locker to drop my shiat off in. I hate it when I get stuck travelling alone with a three or four hour layover and have to carry it all around with me. Especially if I have to go through security to have a cigarette. It would be great to be able to lock up my backpack, carry on bag and coat and would probably help shorten security lines.
 
2013-01-19 10:18:29 PM

Bacontastesgood: Like everything at O'hare, the pricing is stupid expensive. Actually it's worse because you can get a regular room with King sized bed in the Hilton right there for $120-150 depending on the night, at least if you book more than a day ahead.


These are for the people who couldn't book a day ahead. $229 for a room tomorrow night at the Hilton O'Hare. I guess you could book a hotel room with your flight, then cancel it day of if everything looks like it's going well, but for an emergency room $120/night isn't bad considering it's built into the airport.

I'm just surprised so many hotels are built near the airport, but so few are attached to the airport. I know that airport shuttles can be used, but it just seems like the all-in-one experience is so American that it's weird it hasn't happened at every major airport.

Like, Denver's new airport has tons of unused space right next to the parking garage out front, but all the airport hotels are a few exits down the freeway. Portland has a bunch of hotels just down the light rail line, but that's $2.50 each way, or you can wait for the hotel shuttle. Both of those also have the advantage of being major airports that serve a number of smaller cities that don't have direct air service, so a good chunk of people flying out will have spent a few hours driving to the airport in the first place. Having on-site accommodations is a nice feature, even if most flyers won't use it.

LAX seems like another obvious choice to have either something like this, or something like the more traditional Westin in the Detroit airport or the Hilton attached to Boston. I'd think a combination airport/hotel/conference center would do well since they all share similar amenities.
 
2013-01-19 10:23:24 PM

davidphogan: I'd be willing to pay a few bucks an hour for a secure locker to drop my shiat off in. I hate it when I get stuck travelling alone with a three or four hour layover and have to carry it all around with me. Especially if I have to go through security to have a cigarette. It would be great to be able to lock up my backpack, carry on bag and coat and would probably help shorten security lines.


Sadly, 911 killed that off for good.
 
2013-01-19 10:26:49 PM

fireclown: davidphogan: I'd be willing to pay a few bucks an hour for a secure locker to drop my shiat off in. I hate it when I get stuck travelling alone with a three or four hour layover and have to carry it all around with me. Especially if I have to go through security to have a cigarette. It would be great to be able to lock up my backpack, carry on bag and coat and would probably help shorten security lines.

Sadly, 911 killed that off for good.


You're probably right, but I just can't figure out if the stuff is secure enough to go on a plane why can't it be left locked up?
 
2013-01-19 10:29:26 PM

davidphogan: fireclown: davidphogan: I'd be willing to pay a few bucks an hour for a secure locker to drop my shiat off in. I hate it when I get stuck travelling alone with a three or four hour layover and have to carry it all around with me. Especially if I have to go through security to have a cigarette. It would be great to be able to lock up my backpack, carry on bag and coat and would probably help shorten security lines.

Sadly, 911 killed that off for good.

You're probably right, but I just can't figure out if the stuff is secure enough to go on a plane why can't it be left locked up?


You make a good point, but I just don't see it happening.
 
2013-01-19 10:59:58 PM

davidphogan: fireclown: davidphogan: I'd be willing to pay a few bucks an hour for a secure locker to drop my shiat off in. I hate it when I get stuck travelling alone with a three or four hour layover and have to carry it all around with me. Especially if I have to go through security to have a cigarette. It would be great to be able to lock up my backpack, carry on bag and coat and would probably help shorten security lines.

Sadly, 911 killed that off for good.

You're probably right, but I just can't figure out if the stuff is secure enough to go on a plane why can't it be left locked up?


You want LOGIC? You're talking TSA here!
 
2013-01-19 11:02:37 PM
I didn't get a problem with farking out of the article; what i got was a veiled concern about prostitution. Which is illegal in Chicago and IL, i'm assuming.
 
2013-01-19 11:27:27 PM

redly1: ewe...if they keep up the rooms as well as they keep up the rest of ohare, no thanks


Whoa, whoa, WHOA! No one said anything about livestock!
 
2013-01-19 11:41:15 PM

davidphogan: I'd be willing to pay a few bucks an hour for a secure locker to drop my shiat off in. I hate it when I get stuck travelling alone with a three or four hour layover and have to carry it all around with me. Especially if I have to go through security to have a cigarette. It would be great to be able to lock up my backpack, carry on bag and coat and would probably help shorten security lines.


Last time I flew, I sent most of my luggage via FedEx Ground and just carried a backpack with a day's worth of clothes and a few essentials on the flight. The cost difference was negligible (shipping was cheaper but the box only stood up to two cross-country shipments), but the convenience of having to carry so little was well worth it.
 
2013-01-19 11:42:08 PM

Chinchillazilla: I don't know why more airports don't do this.


Minneapolis had something similar a number of years back but last time I flew through there (this was before the Lindburgh terminal got rebuilt) they were gone.
 
2013-01-19 11:57:05 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: I'm sure this won't go awry at *all.*


I rented one at Narita a couple times. They are great. It had a shower, a bed, toilet, etc.
 
2013-01-20 12:03:45 AM

davidphogan: I'd be willing to pay a few bucks an hour for a secure locker to drop my shiat off in. I hate it when I get stuck travelling alone with a three or four hour layover and have to carry it all around with me. Especially if I have to go through security to have a cigarette. It would be great to be able to lock up my backpack, carry on bag and coat and would probably help shorten security lines.


Again, Narita has lockers. I vaguely seem to recall Dallas having them too, but I may be wrong.
 
2013-01-20 01:59:46 AM

davidphogan: I'd be willing to pay a few bucks an hour for a secure locker to drop my shiat off in. I hate it when I get stuck travelling alone with a three or four hour layover and have to carry it all around with me. Especially if I have to go through security to have a cigarette. It would be great to be able to lock up my backpack, carry on bag and coat and would probably help shorten security lines.


Backpack. Airport. Paranoia.
Not kidding.
Dig, I was at DFW, American Terminal, B4 Door, Upper level.
I'm waiting on my ride...usual commute, coming in from "work" out in San Fran Psycho, waited at the carousel with a nervous, decidedly pudgy, long hair...as his backpack came around I watched a fat baggie with an herb that was called "Red Haired Sinsemilla" roll out of his pack as it came onto the pickup revolver. He snatched his backpack up and strode through the terminal doors and stopped at the curb. Another fat baggie dropped out. Being a nice guy, I told the hippie dude that I'd picked up his weed inside, and what he just dropped. He looked at me, and at the two bulging baggies, and started sort of a chant of..."no, not mine, go away. It isn't mine please leave me alone", and last but not least, the ever popular "I'm going to call a cop!" I couldn't help but laugh at his nervousness as I held the two Jumbo Party Packs in plain sight. I told him "okay, and thanks", then my ride pulled up and we went off to celebrate the splendors of "Airport Paranoia-V-1980".
The airport was a trip. People with suitcases full of money, suitcases full of snorksno, and money and dope hand-offs that just sort of didn't work. Used to fly Continental a lot, the pre-metal detector restroom. Guy in end stall removes ceiling tile, puts stuff into ceiling, replaces tile, leaves. So I naturally went over there and recovered a very nice parting gift! That was a good LZ to flit in and out of...
The airport Hotel? Nice place. I once took a south american gent over there from the terminal(he looked confused, and I was a "local". He was angry at being put off his plane for being mucho barracho. He wanted to buy my S&W459, offered $2,000. The man bought himself a good 9mm at a price he suggested. Anyway, the guy was a "somebody" and nobody knew him. He wanted to kill a few people that flew away on his plane...I guess he was thinking about the 64 kilos of Coke going around on the carousel at Ohare.
Still, he was one hell of a guy, not familiar with the way everybody is Rodney Daingerfield in 'merica...none of us get any respect, and we sure as hell ain't passing it out. It's good to know there are still people who will kill you for being disrespectful....oh, wait....maybe I shouldn't have sold him the heater.
WhatwasIsaying?
Uh. Sorry...rambling...stereo-opticness...the old delta9...
 
2013-01-20 02:25:40 AM
Solon Isonomia: still, the soundproof walls implies the developer was taking loud farking into mind...

I know you were being funny, but in the USA, lawyers actually think like this.
 
2013-01-20 03:59:50 AM
I would swear on a stack of Bibles that I saw a similar set-up at Ohare back around 1995. I recall thinking it would be cool to have my then girlfriend meet me there so we could try it out.
 
2013-01-20 06:42:23 PM

Chinchillazilla: I don't know why more airports don't do this.


They do. Incheon, Narita and Beijing airports all have them.
 
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