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(A letter to some guy)   "Where's my magic button, the switch I can flip to show men like you what it feels like on the other side of your 'jokes' and 'compliments'?"   (rolereboot.org) divider line 1000
    More: Scary, Liam Payne, female politicians, magic, patriarchy  
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22252 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Jan 2013 at 8:58 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-01-19 04:37:30 AM  
So being really attractive is a two sided coin, eh?  Who woulda thought.

Of course on the other side of the coin is; greater salariesundeserved promotions, more lenient sentences, ugh, lets stop the list there.....

I wonder why your article didnt mention how your husband deals with your attractiveness?
 
2013-01-19 04:45:46 AM  
The author, and most of the commenters, needs to grow a pair.
 
2013-01-19 05:00:03 AM  
What about all the women who have harassed ME about my enormous dong? What about MY rights??

/never happened once
//cries softly to himself
 
2013-01-19 05:19:56 AM  

Frederick: So being really attractive is a two sided coin, eh?  Who woulda thought.

Of course on the other side of the coin is; greater salaries,  undeserved promotions, more lenient sentences, ugh, lets stop the list there.....

I wonder why your article didnt mention how your husband deals with your attractiveness?


Fark you. Attractive women are not the only women who deal with farkupitude from guys. I got the same crap this woman got, either of the same type, or worse, the same experience not tempered by a pretty face. If you're female, you're fair game, out there in the world of assholes.

And her husband? Really?

Go EABOD.
 
2013-01-19 05:38:09 AM  
Don't worry DNWPG. If your real-life personality is anything like your Fark personality, they'll leave you alone as soon as they get to know you.
 
2013-01-19 06:34:37 AM  

DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: Frederick: So being really attractive is a two sided coin, eh?  Who woulda thought.

Of course on the other side of the coin is; greater salaries,  undeserved promotions, more lenient sentences, ugh, lets stop the list there.....

I wonder why your article didnt mention how your husband deals with your attractiveness?

Fark you. Attractive women are not the only women who deal with farkupitude from guys. I got the same crap this woman got, either of the same type, or worse, the same experience not tempered by a pretty face. If you're female, you're fair game, out there in the world of assholes.

And her husband? Really?

Go EABOD.


Hmmm.  I read the article as I'm-so-pretty-guys-wont-leave-me-alone and apparently you read the article as all-men-are-rapists-in-waiting.

Fark me & EABOD...?  Thats a little harsh.
 
2013-01-19 06:39:38 AM  
She was wearing yoga pants.  Yoga pants are an aphrodisiac.

If you don't want attention, wear sweatpants without "juicy" printed on the back.  Or mom jeans.  I have years of experience in looking unattractive.

Go to a gay bar looking "nice?"  Yeah, the creeps come out.  That's expected.
 
2013-01-19 07:28:35 AM  
Don't worry. Some day you'll hit that right age where you become invisible to men. Then it's fun to watch women freak out that they can't get attention anymore.
 
2013-01-19 08:06:24 AM  

Honest Bender: Don't worry. Some day you'll hit that right age where you become invisible to men. Then it's fun to watch women freak out that they can't get attention anymore.


And all those years of coasting by on looks and never developing a personality while complaining that they're only recognized for their looks come back to haunt them!
 
2013-01-19 08:45:03 AM  
"Where's my magic button?" First, take off your panties.
 
2013-01-19 08:46:36 AM  
i212.photobucket.com
 
2013-01-19 09:01:20 AM  

"and a middle-aged guy"


If it had been a hot young guy it would have been fine.
 
2013-01-19 09:02:44 AM  
Woah... Someone has a lot of sand in their vagina.
 
2013-01-19 09:04:09 AM  

Honest Bender: Don't worry. Some day you'll hit that right age where you become invisible to men. Then it's fun to watch women freak out that they can't get attention anymore.


a heaping helping of THIS. the ho doth protest too much. like celebutards who call the paparazzi, then act like divas when they paps arrive.

-----------------------------------------------

DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: Frederick: So being really attractive is a two sided coin, eh?  Who woulda thought.

Of course on the other side of the coin is; greater salaries,  undeserved promotions, more lenient sentences, ugh, lets stop the list there.....

I wonder why your article didnt mention how your husband deals with your attractiveness?

Fark you. Attractive women are not the only women who deal with farkupitude from guys. I got the same crap this woman got, either of the same type, or worse, the same experience not tempered by a pretty face. If you're female, you're fair game, out there in the world of assholes.

And her husband? Really?

Go EABOD.


I see what you're saying, and agree with it. Again, leads back to the ho doth protest too much. She's not really, she's bragging. See also: hos who make a point of pointing out their BMI when it's on the low end.
 
2013-01-19 09:04:17 AM  
upload.wikimedia.org

"Where's my magic button?". Its called marriage sweetheart!

// YES I know what ring that is
 
2013-01-19 09:05:11 AM  
Ladies: You can have equality when you stop using your body to get free shiat.

Deal?
 
2013-01-19 09:05:17 AM  

FirstNationalBastard: Honest Bender: Don't worry. Some day you'll hit that right age where you become invisible to men. Then it's fun to watch women freak out that they can't get attention anymore.

And all those years of coasting by on looks and never developing a personality while complaining that they're only recognized for their looks come back to haunt them!


Eh, they'll just live throught their daughters. The circle completes itself.
 
2013-01-19 09:07:00 AM  
To the author:

I'm a dude. I'm a 5'10" 190 lb dude. I still sometimes walk to the other side of the street if someone who looks like bad news is coming toward me. I'd still get a cab rather than stand at a bus stop with someone who gives me the creeps. It's called common sense.

Quit assuming that you're unfairly forced to have some common sense because you're pretty and a girl.

As to the rude comments. Words only have power if you let them. Ignore them.

Keep doing what you're doing - i.e. taking the smart steps to keep your self safe.... but just lose the "poor pretty me" attitude about doing it.
 
2013-01-19 09:07:10 AM  

Honest Bender: Don't worry. Some day you'll hit that right age where you become invisible to men. Then it's fun to watch women freak out that they can't get attention anymore.


Whoa -- too much honesty! You'll kill the hamster!
 
2013-01-19 09:08:37 AM  

Smashed Hat: What about all the women who have harassed ME about my enormous dong? What about MY rights??


This may make you feel better.

/not a rickroll
 
2013-01-19 09:09:01 AM  

Honest Bender: Don't worry. Some day you'll hit that right age where you become invisible to men. Then it's fun to watch women freak out that they can't get attention anymore.


Wise you are.
 
2013-01-19 09:09:12 AM  
Breaking News...Dudes can be assholes and unarmed women who've never figured out a way to defend themselves feel helpless!

More at 11!
 
2013-01-19 09:10:28 AM  
It's hard to concentrate on this in such a sandwich-free environment....
 
2013-01-19 09:11:41 AM  

phillyguy1547: Quit assuming that you're unfairly forced to have some common sense because you're pretty and a girl.


QFT
 
2013-01-19 09:12:23 AM  

ModernLuddite: Ladies: You can have equality when you stop using your body to get free shiat.

Deal?


Never happen. Not just because men wouldn't allow it to happen, either. It's easier to deal with someone as a body, than as a person. It's easier to control (and be controlled). Things are simpler. Everyone likes simple.

--------------------------------------------------------------------- - ------------------------

Smashed Hat: What about all the women who have harassed ME about my enormous dong? What about MY rights??

/never happened once
//cries softly to himself



Thank you for pointing this out. There are some major social differences at work here. There is no straight comparison at all. What do women want from men, that men will become harassed and frightened and angry about when women continue to pursue it from them without their permission (besides alimony)?
 
2013-01-19 09:12:38 AM  
Chick needs to get laid . . . big time.
 
2013-01-19 09:12:40 AM  

Frederick: DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: Frederick: So being really attractive is a two sided coin, eh?  Who woulda thought.

Of course on the other side of the coin is; greater salaries,  undeserved promotions, more lenient sentences, ugh, lets stop the list there.....

I wonder why your article didnt mention how your husband deals with your attractiveness?

Fark you. Attractive women are not the only women who deal with farkupitude from guys. I got the same crap this woman got, either of the same type, or worse, the same experience not tempered by a pretty face. If you're female, you're fair game, out there in the world of assholes.

And her husband? Really?

Go EABOD.

Hmmm.  I read the article as I'm-so-pretty-guys-wont-leave-me-alone and apparently you read the article as all-men-are-rapists-in-waiting.

Fark me & EABOD...?  Thats a little harsh.


So you thought her related instances of sexual harassment only happened because she wanted to prove she's THAT attractive?

And then you launch the "all-men-are-rapists-in-waiting" straw man.

Not harsh enough.
 
2013-01-19 09:13:12 AM  

DrPainMD: Don't worry DNWPG. If your real-life personality is anything like your Fark personality, they'll leave you alone as soon as they get to know you.


Boy, please. Who pissed in your cheerios this morning?
 
2013-01-19 09:13:25 AM  

Honest Bender: Don't worry. Some day you'll hit that right age where you become invisible to men. Then it's fun to watch women freak out that they can't get attention anymore.


I saw one of those yesterday morning. She was around forty, forty-five, wearing a top that said, "I have the pussy, I make the rules."
 
2013-01-19 09:13:55 AM  

jaybeezey: Breaking News...Dudes can be assholes and unarmed women who've never figured out a way to defend themselves feel helpless!

More at 11!


This chick sounds like someone I'd rather not meet armed, at night.

"But officer, he was CLEARLY carrying a penis, I didn't know what he'd do with it! (Doe eyes) I was so afraid..."
 
2013-01-19 09:17:16 AM  
Also published as "A Morning's Stroll In Italy".
 
2013-01-19 09:17:22 AM  

Mister Peejay: Smashed Hat: What about all the women who have harassed ME about my enormous dong? What about MY rights??

This may make you feel better.

/not a rickroll


If its too big, most women won't let you go all the way in without lots and lots and lots and lots of prepwork. There are no quickie ram sessions. Then you're stuck with mastubating, size queens, homos or horses. I guess that's alright, though.
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2013-01-19 09:17:36 AM  
Maybe the first time someone comments on your ass in public you'll take it as a compliment, but what about the next 12 times?

My middle aged male ass is not going to get compliments (from women or gay men). I could survive being one of the nos in her no... no... no... yes! series.

I do ask myself what if somebody I really didn't want were doing the same to me. And if you take offense at something well within my tolerance in that situation, I call you nasty misogynistic names in my head and write you off as a person.
 
2013-01-19 09:17:36 AM  
slowfacts.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-01-19 09:17:46 AM  
But it's still OK to male bash, right ladies?
 
2013-01-19 09:18:02 AM  
While I sympathize somewhat, I have a couple of problems with articles like this:

1. There's a subtle suggestion that this type of harassment and/or unwanted attention NEVER happens to men
2. There's a underlying belief that "men" (in general) condone these types of actions
3. The "outrage" seems to be for the express purpose of generating blog hits

There's jerks in life; we encounter them every day. To attribute an given individual's jerky behaviour to any conveniently defined "group" is intellectually dishonest. If I were to put blinders on and conveniently ignore those instances where persons of my gender were jerks to me (and instead focused only on those instances where person of the opposite gender were jerks to me), I could become a social justice crusader.
 
2013-01-19 09:18:48 AM  

Honest Bender: Don't worry. Some day you'll hit that right age where you become invisible to men. Then it's fun to watch women freak out that they can't get attention anymore.


I'm that age now, or rapidly approaching it, and let me tell you, it's a relief. I can now enjoy the benefits most guys have, which is not being stared at by some guy, any guy, anywhere i go. Of course, I'm am geek girl and would have liked these benefits of "this age" 30 years ago.

Of course, if you're openly being cruised by aggressive gay guys whenever and wherever you go, you have my sympathy...age falls off slower it seems.
 
2013-01-19 09:19:05 AM  

ExperianScaresCthulhu: What do women want from men, that men will become harassed and frightened and angry about when women continue to pursue it from them without their permission (besides alimony)?


Their children?
 
2013-01-19 09:19:27 AM  

Frederick: So being really attractive is a two sided coin, eh?  Who woulda thought.

Of course on the other side of the coin is; greater salaries,  undeserved promotions, more lenient sentences, ugh, lets stop the list there.....

I wonder why your article didnt mention how your husband deals with your attractiveness?


Good looking men get more money and raise through the ranks faster. Good looking women get sidelined into pretty-face positions.

Women have to be average to slightly-above-average looking, thin but not too thin, fashionable without being slutty or dowdy, done up without going too far - women live on a razor's edge that doesn't exist for men. Everything a woman does is open for judgement, in a way that isn't true for men. Go farking talk to some women. Ask them how stressful buying a skirt is - is it fashionable or slutty to have a hemline 2 inches above their knees? What if they're self-conscious about their knees and want to wear a below-the-knees skirt - will people subconsciously regard them as too conservative and pass them over for big projects or management positions?

Talk to women. Check your assumptions, and listen with an open mind. Remember that all the problems they list - obsessing over being taken seriously, obsessing over avoiding or feeling guilty about inviting unwanted attention, obsessing over their appearance - these are all on top of the normal life stresses. Being a woman doesn't let you off the hook from your health, paying the bills, keeping your car in good working order, and all the other annoyances of life.

If you're not interested in doing this then just recognize that you don't have the perspective and knowledge to empathize with being a woman. You should just consider that many attractive women who age feel relief (and guilt over that relief) when they become "invisible" and are no longer subject to all that extra special attention. Some also feel crushed because most of their male friends were just in it to bump bits for a few minutes, and years of companionship and shared experience were apparently for naught.
 
2013-01-19 09:19:51 AM  
So the consensus in this thread is that the guys described in TFA did nothing wrong? There's no point in criticizing their behavior, boys will be boys, right? wink wink nudge nudge.
 
2013-01-19 09:19:54 AM  
I do not recall my ever uttering any of the kinds of things the writer mentions to any woman or girl anywhere, at any time, nor do I recall any of my buddies ever having done so.

A good bit of what the writer describes in TFA would be classified as disorderly conduct here. May I suggest, ladies, that you all look up the relevant statutes where you are and that, if you are sufficiently alarmed by this kind of thing, you call a cop the next time it happens.

/I sense that the writer is bragging just a little bit....
 
2013-01-19 09:20:16 AM  
That level of paranoia is not normal. That is what she is describing, there's a world of difference between due vigilance and the paranoia of a simpleton. Just maybe, it's a case of the victim gravitating towards them.(AW as people above documented).

That kind of cat-calling is, by and large, a regional thing, the only attainable solution is to move to someplace that activities like that aren't common. I get a kick out of at the bottom of the article it says she loves Chicago. That's an obvious lie if half the populace is like that.

Who needs an app to see what they're doing wrong? It's not that society at large does not think it's wrong, it's that the perpetrators of such behavior DO NOT CARE.

Men's hair gets pointed out well enough, The Donald for a great example, or Nicholas Cage's. So *drumroll* that argument is irrelevant.
 
2013-01-19 09:20:19 AM  
I work in construction, and my crew takes some pride in being pleasant to passers-by. We were on a job downtown, and lots of women would walk by on their way to work. Of course we would notice them, and got to the point where we were exchanging "good mornings" with the friendlier ones. Then the electricians arrived, including a punk kid who spent a lot of time harassing women walking by. After that, most of the women crossed the street or took a different route to work.
Jerks who act like the ones the author describes are ruining things for men as well as women.
 
2013-01-19 09:21:38 AM  

DrPainMD: Don't worry DNWPG. If your real-life personality is anything like your Fark personality, they'll leave you alone as soon as they get to know you.


Yea, because the last guy who groped my ass in a crowded subway car wanted to know what I thought of the dual Higgs discovery, you moron.
 
2013-01-19 09:22:07 AM  

jimmajim: So the consensus in this thread is that the guys described in TFA did nothing wrong? There's no point in criticizing their behavior, boys will be boys, right? wink wink nudge nudge.


Who said that? Be specific.
 
2013-01-19 09:22:50 AM  

SnarfVader: But it's still OK to male bash, right ladies?


Who said that? Why is it ok to attribute the words of a few women to all men? Are we taking the words of fringe men - that female sexual pleasure is perverse and that they should have their clitoris removed - and projecting them over all of men? No. We aren't.

I wonder why you are projecting fringe views of a few people across all of women? Perhaps to justify your own bigoted position?
 
2013-01-19 09:23:44 AM  
I eagerly await the follow up article in 20 years whining about how guys don't pay attention to her anymore.
 
2013-01-19 09:24:56 AM  
Well...did she get the beef or pork taco??

Taco...giggity
 
2013-01-19 09:24:57 AM  

DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: DrPainMD: Don't worry DNWPG. If your real-life personality is anything like your Fark personality, they'll leave you alone as soon as they get to know you.

Yea, because the last guy who groped my ass in a crowded subway car wanted to know what I thought of the dual Higgs discovery, you moron.


Do you think that this doesn't happen to men? When I was younger, I had my ass groped (without my consent) a number of times. I imagine that men who are more attractive then me have experienced this even more.
 
2013-01-19 09:25:22 AM  

Mister Peejay: Smashed Hat: What about all the women who have harassed ME about my enormous dong? What about MY rights??

This may make you feel better.

/not a rickroll


Does anyone rickroll anymore?
 
2013-01-19 09:25:26 AM  
Sounds to me like Emily Moss needs to get laid.


Badly.
 
2013-01-19 09:25:28 AM  

Bored Horde: SnarfVader: But it's still OK to male bash, right ladies?

Who said that? Why is it ok to attribute the words of a few women to all men? Are we taking the words of fringe men - that female sexual pleasure is perverse and that they should have their clitoris removed - and projecting them over all of men? No. We aren't.

I wonder why you are projecting fringe views of a few people across all of women? Perhaps to justify your own bigoted position?


Did you even read the linked article? Plus, you just did it right there. Nice.
 
2013-01-19 09:26:21 AM  

omeganuepsilon: That level of paranoia is not normal. That is what she is describing, there's a world of difference between due vigilance and the paranoia of a simpleton. Just maybe, it's a case of the victim gravitating towards them.(AW as people above documented).

That kind of cat-calling is, by and large, a regional thing, the only attainable solution is to move to someplace that activities like that aren't common. I get a kick out of at the bottom of the article it says she loves Chicago. That's an obvious lie if half the populace is like that.

Who needs an app to see what they're doing wrong? It's not that society at large does not think it's wrong, it's that the perpetrators of such behavior DO NOT CARE.

Men's hair gets pointed out well enough, The Donald for a great example, or Nicholas Cage's. So *drumroll* that argument is irrelevant.


Two examples of celebrities.

In the business world, if you're a man, as long as your hair is short and under control, everyone ignores it. It's a check box item. Women's hair gets graded. Men's clothing is the same - it's pass/fail, either the suit is clean, pressed, and fits or it's bad. Women's clothing gets graded for appearance, fashion, and riding the thin line between dowdy and slutty.

If you don't understand this then you're not ready to participate in a discussion about the matter - go read some farking books.
 
2013-01-19 09:28:51 AM  
I didn't know Saturday morning was "sexist asshole" time here. Good to know.
 
2013-01-19 09:29:20 AM  

WhippingBoy: jimmajim: So the consensus in this thread is that the guys described in TFA did nothing wrong? There's no point in criticizing their behavior, boys will be boys, right? wink wink nudge nudge.

Who said that? Be specific.


No one did -- my point is that there's plenty of criticism of TFA's author (and women in general) in here, but, strangely, no criticism of the phenomenon she's describing.
 
2013-01-19 09:29:41 AM  

Bored Horde: In the business world, if you're a man, as long as your hair is short and under control, everyone ignores it. It's a check box item. Women's hair gets graded. Men's clothing is the same - it's pass/fail, either the suit is clean, pressed, and fits or it's bad. Women's clothing gets graded for appearance, fashion, and riding the thin line between dowdy and slutty.


Are you sure about this? Do you have anything to back it up instead of your personal impressions or a ranting post from Jezebel?
 
2013-01-19 09:29:41 AM  

WhippingBoy: DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: DrPainMD: Don't worry DNWPG. If your real-life personality is anything like your Fark personality, they'll leave you alone as soon as they get to know you.

Yea, because the last guy who groped my ass in a crowded subway car wanted to know what I thought of the dual Higgs discovery, you moron.

Do you think that this doesn't happen to men? When I was younger, I had my ass groped (without my consent) a number of times. I imagine that men who are more attractive then me have experienced this even more.


Groping a woman carries the implicit threat of rape in a way that a woman groping a man doesn't. However uncomfortable you felt being groped, remember that women are taught that it's their fault they got groped, that all men are groping raping monsters and it's the woman's fault if they let them get close.

For you, it was the simple act of violation of your body. For women, it's that AND a reminder that their body's positive assets belong to society.
 
2013-01-19 09:30:19 AM  
I've made a list of things Angry Feminists like about men:
 
2013-01-19 09:31:23 AM  

jimmajim: So the consensus in this thread is that the guys described in TFA did nothing wrong? There's no point in criticizing their behavior, boys will be boys, right? wink wink nudge nudge.


Of course it is. No opportunity to bash women goes to waste here, no matter how laughably archaic it is. They're practically a FARK talisman against fear of the vag.

/yes my precious...
 
2013-01-19 09:31:26 AM  

Bored Horde: For you, it was the simple act of violation of your body.


Oh well then, hardly worth mentioning...
 
2013-01-19 09:32:43 AM  

WhippingBoy: jimmajim: So the consensus in this thread is that the guys described in TFA did nothing wrong? There's no point in criticizing their behavior, boys will be boys, right? wink wink nudge nudge.

Who said that? Be specific.


No one did -- my point is that there's plenty of criticism in here of TFA's author, but, strangely, no criticism of the behavior that she describes.
 
2013-01-19 09:32:51 AM  
Sexual harrassment is the wrong man noticing your tits.
 
2013-01-19 09:33:42 AM  

Bored Horde: In the business world


That's a pretty broad brush. Maybe in sales or business communications, but it's rarely so in, say, engineering or industrial management.
 
2013-01-19 09:34:31 AM  
I love her "jailbreak the patriarchy" plug in from Google. I've done things like that for years to point out instances of blatant sexism against men, it's amazing what swapping pronouns can do. So instead of being a sexist, why not trying people like human beings?

I've two big gripes about this article. The first is that women reach an age around their mid-40's and all of attention stops. It's called becoming invisible, and their are websites and products designed to fight this problem. My point being that it's overblown, even if their are guys out there that are complete jerks. If she's really concerned for her safety she should get a concealed carry permit and take safety classes, many are designed just for women.

My second gripe with the article is that women give other women a far harder time in life than men do. I've had female friends my entire life, and I can't think of a single one of them that would say men give them more trouble then other women do. Again, back to my point, why not treat people decently regardless of who they are?
 
2013-01-19 09:34:34 AM  

jimmajim: WhippingBoy: jimmajim: So the consensus in this thread is that the guys described in TFA did nothing wrong? There's no point in criticizing their behavior, boys will be boys, right? wink wink nudge nudge.

Who said that? Be specific.

No one did -- my point is that there's plenty of criticism in here of TFA's author, but, strangely, no criticism of the behavior that she describes.


D'oh, double post. Oh well, it's probably worth saying twice.
 
2013-01-19 09:34:52 AM  
Switch, you just need a gun

mymovietime.net
 
2013-01-19 09:35:00 AM  

WhippingBoy: Bored Horde: In the business world, if you're a man, as long as your hair is short and under control, everyone ignores it. It's a check box item. Women's hair gets graded. Men's clothing is the same - it's pass/fail, either the suit is clean, pressed, and fits or it's bad. Women's clothing gets graded for appearance, fashion, and riding the thin line between dowdy and slutty.

Are you sure about this? Do you have anything to back it up instead of your personal impressions or a ranting post from Jezebel?


Yes - this is basic perceptual research into photos of people, established in the 20th century and now a staple item of undergraduate introductory projects because the experiment is completely understood, the results fully analyzed, and it's still repeatable with the same findings.

Men's hair attracts comments like "professional" or "unprofessional", women's hair attracts comments like "fashionable" "stylish" "flirty" "professional" - it's graded on a spectrum. Again, if you've never understood this stuff and have any interest in learning what it's like to live as a woman in the Western world, then go read some books on the matter. You're not going to get a comprehensive education from a Fark thread, you're going to read a few nuggest of perspective among a flowing river of shiat from the internet misogynists.
 
2013-01-19 09:35:32 AM  

tfresh: [upload.wikimedia.org image 200x173]

"Where's my magic button?". Its called marriage sweetheart!

// YES I know what ring that is


Ha! A wedding ring doesn't stop them. They don't care. Now, if I had the One ring, it would be another story.....
 
2013-01-19 09:35:56 AM  
I want to email her about some women I see who use their gender as an excuse to get away with bad behavior.
 
2013-01-19 09:36:00 AM  

ExperianScaresCthulhu:

I see what you're saying, and agree with it. Again, leads back to the ho doth protest too much. She's not really, she's bragging. See also: hos who make a point of pointing out their BMI when it's on the low end.


We raise our daughters to be doctors, lawyers, and citizens, but then some people treat these women like walking sex toys, and when the young women point this out because they discover how frightening and frustrating it gets, they can't POSSIBLY be serious.
 
2013-01-19 09:36:12 AM  

jimmajim: So the consensus in this thread is that the guys described in TFA did nothing wrong? There's no point in criticizing their behavior, boys will be boys, right? wink wink nudge nudge.


Actually, it's a sign of a much larger social problem. Susan Faludi describes it well in her book "backlash". Basically, when boys don't have men in their lives, and their mothers are checked out (usually fallout from a bad marriage) they turn to a peer-based family. When immature, stupid boys get together, they do ALL kinds of crazy shiat to get laughs and prove alpha status in the pack. It's like that joke about the one white boy with a group of blacks. You KNOW he did something crazy to earn their respect.

I'm not justifying poor behavior, just pointing out that it's not going anywhere. We would need to stabilize families, and their incomes. THEN we'd need a generation, or two, or three of that stability to remove the stink from the genes and family tree.

Considering our politicians actively legislate AGAINST an entire society of strong nuclear families, this will never happen. We need to put a 20%+ tariff on all imports, open our textile mills again, create even more blue collar jobs on top of that. THEN we can start the 3 generation plus process of reteaching our children how to be morally strong, ethically brave. Instead, our 'leaders' are cutting budgets to social services, convincing children that bad people are everywhere, and the only way to stop them is to take away our society's access to firearms.

SIMPLY PUT: broken, impovershed families are great breeding grounds for future consumers, soldiers and derps. And we need those stupid women just as much as those stupid men. How else are we going to keep america stocked with fodder for it's armies and advertisements?

/Rant
//29 yr old man, sick of the shiat.
 
2013-01-19 09:36:21 AM  

WhippingBoy: 1. There's a subtle suggestion that this type of harassment and/or unwanted attention NEVER happens to men


no, the suggestion is that women have to deal with that shiat every DAY and men might deal with it a couple times a year.
 
2013-01-19 09:36:41 AM  
I would like to ask all the mouth-breathers who got from this article "I'm so pretty guys won't leave me alone" whether they're admitting to not reading the article, or whether they're admitting to being functionally illiterate. It has to be one of those two things.
 
2013-01-19 09:37:24 AM  
and the day comes when they stop looking
 
2013-01-19 09:37:46 AM  

Oblio13: I've made a list of things Angry Feminists like about men:


Who are "Angry Feminists" other then a strawman you've summoned forth to excuse your shiatty attitudes?

Oh look at me I'm a poor oppressed man, curse my every advantage.
 
2013-01-19 09:37:58 AM  
"Sexual harrassment is the wrong man noticing your tits."

Or specifically, as the author described, "middle aged".

Its funny, she lacks the perspective to realize that she falls right into the same role of objectification she seems to think all men are guilty of.
 
2013-01-19 09:38:11 AM  

letrole: Sexual harrassment is the wrong man noticing your tits.


You can't troll a thread where the most blatantly ignorant opinions are already being expressed in earnest, dude. You can't make a sh*thouse smell worse.
 
2013-01-19 09:39:02 AM  

DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: Frederick: So being really attractive is a two sided coin, eh?  Who woulda thought.

Of course on the other side of the coin is; greater salaries,  undeserved promotions, more lenient sentences, ugh, lets stop the list there.....

I wonder why your article didnt mention how your husband deals with your attractiveness?

Fark you. Attractive women are not the only women who deal with farkupitude from guys. I got the same crap this woman got, either of the same type, or worse, the same experience not tempered by a pretty face. If you're female, you're fair game, out there in the world of assholes.

And her husband? Really?

Go EABOD.


I've had "that moment"

favorited
 
2013-01-19 09:39:39 AM  

medieval: I would like to ask all the mouth-breathers who got from this article "I'm so pretty guys won't leave me alone" whether they're admitting to not reading the article, or whether they're admitting to being functionally illiterate. It has to be one of those two things.


Only Fark newbies or realy bored Farkers at work read the articles. Welcome To The Internet.
 
2013-01-19 09:40:17 AM  

Lehk: WhippingBoy: 1. There's a subtle suggestion that this type of harassment and/or unwanted attention NEVER happens to men

no, the suggestion is that women have to deal with that shiat every DAY and men might deal with it a couple times a year.


I'm not suggesting what you said isn't true, but how do you know that? I mean really know that?

I have no idea what it's like to be a woman; why do women always seem to "know" how wonderful it is to be a man?
 
2013-01-19 09:40:46 AM  
10 years from now:

i.dailymail.co.uk

"I wish somebody would holler at me like they did before. I feel so ugly and old. Where the hell is that Long Island iced tea I ordered?"
 
2013-01-19 09:41:05 AM  

someonelse: letrole: Sexual harrassment is the wrong man noticing your tits.

You can't troll a thread where the most blatantly ignorant opinions are already being expressed in earnest, dude. You can't make a sh*thouse smell worse.


It's true. It's The Onion's problem. When Republicans elected to the Federal Government are lamenting the dearth of rights we give Rapists over the women they've raped, how can you satirize life?
 
2013-01-19 09:41:21 AM  

DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: ExperianScaresCthulhu:

I see what you're saying, and agree with it. Again, leads back to the ho doth protest too much. She's not really, she's bragging. See also: hos who make a point of pointing out their BMI when it's on the low end.

We raise our daughters to be doctors, lawyers, and citizens, but then some people treat these women like walking sex toys, and when the young women point this out because they discover how frightening and frustrating it gets, they can't POSSIBLY be serious.


Gee, with women spending billions and billions of dollars on clothing, hair styling, salons, manicures, pedicures, make-up, fashion magazines, Cosmo, etc., etc., to compete with each other, I don't understand why,

The problem is perpetuated by women.

This is a case of people outside of the bell curve realizing they were born on the wrong planet. It's like an atheist wondering why religious people are religious.
 
2013-01-19 09:42:56 AM  

someonelse: letrole: Sexual harrassment is the wrong man noticing your tits.

You can't troll a thread where the most blatantly ignorant opinions are already being expressed in earnest, dude. You can't make a sh*thouse smell worse.


I'm in a commited relationship with a woman 8 years older than me. He's not trolling, it's true. She's old enough that she fears not being attractive on a regular basis. She's real enough that she'll flat out admit that she doesn't want gross dudes oggling her. If an attractive man checks her out or compliments her, it makes her feel great because it means (on a genetic level at least) that she's viable. Basic programming at it's finest.
 
2013-01-19 09:43:02 AM  

jimmajim: jimmajim: WhippingBoy: jimmajim: So the consensus in this thread is that the guys described in TFA did nothing wrong? There's no point in criticizing their behavior, boys will be boys, right? wink wink nudge nudge.

Who said that? Be specific.

No one did -- my point is that there's plenty of criticism in here of TFA's author, but, strangely, no criticism of the behavior that she describes.

D'oh, double post. Oh well, it's probably worth saying twice.


Perhaps people feel that it's so obvious that it's not worth mentioning.

In any case, the man in the article engaged in oppressive, privileged, and unacceptable behaviour; no question about that.
 
2013-01-19 09:43:16 AM  

weltallica: [i.imgur.com image 625x1250]

Go on...


i read a quote once where a woman said her burqa was liberating and "western" women were the ones imprisoned by freedom (and the pressure) to display
 
2013-01-19 09:43:58 AM  

PanicMan: I didn't know Saturday morning was "sexist asshole" time here. Good to know.


Yeah Im gonna mark it on my calendar from now on.

Bored Horde: WhippingBoy: DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: DrPainMD: Don't worry DNWPG. If your real-life personality is anything like your Fark personality, they'll leave you alone as soon as they get to know you.

Yea, because the last guy who groped my ass in a crowded subway car wanted to know what I thought of the dual Higgs discovery, you moron.

Do you think that this doesn't happen to men? When I was younger, I had my ass groped (without my consent) a number of times. I imagine that men who are more attractive then me have experienced this even more.

Groping a woman carries the implicit threat of rape in a way that a woman groping a man doesn't. However uncomfortable you felt being groped, remember that women are taught that it's their fault they got groped, that all men are groping raping monsters and it's the woman's fault if they let them get close.

For you, it was the simple act of violation of your body. For women, it's that AND a reminder that their body's positive assets belong to society.


While I agree with you completely you are assuming it was a woman who groped him. However the point still stands that far more women get raped then men and it is a much bigger threat getting your ass grabbed.

The thing is every single woman I know has had to deal with the potential for sexual harassment as an ongoing part of her daily life. And even though I have reached the supposedly "invisible" age I still have to deal with that shiat. And I assure you I am thoroughly average in appearance. OTOH my hubby who is very tall and very handsome has never ever been sexually harassed.
 
2013-01-19 09:44:06 AM  
God, the male butthurt comments in this thread are really pathetic. I look forward to the day when your 14 year old daughter get the shiat scared out of her by some 30 year old stranger who thinks it's his right to comment on her ass. Make sure she understands that she shouldn't dress so slutty or be so attractive.Tell her to get used to it,she's got many years of strangers with a bizarre sense of entitlement judging her attire and figure.
 
2013-01-19 09:44:17 AM  

Bored Horde: medieval: I would like to ask all the mouth-breathers who got from this article "I'm so pretty guys won't leave me alone" whether they're admitting to not reading the article, or whether they're admitting to being functionally illiterate. It has to be one of those two things.

Only Fark newbies or realy bored Farkers at work read the articles. Welcome To The Internet.


Yes, Robert. Welcome to the internet.
 
2013-01-19 09:47:39 AM  

WhippingBoy: DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: DrPainMD: Don't worry DNWPG. If your real-life personality is anything like your Fark personality, they'll leave you alone as soon as they get to know you.

Yea, because the last guy who groped my ass in a crowded subway car wanted to know what I thought of the dual Higgs discovery, you moron.

Do you think that this doesn't happen to men? When I was younger, I had my ass groped (without my consent) a number of times. I imagine that men who are more attractive then me have experienced this even more.


It was your yoga pants.
 
2013-01-19 09:48:43 AM  

WhippingBoy: Lehk: WhippingBoy: 1. There's a subtle suggestion that this type of harassment and/or unwanted attention NEVER happens to men

no, the suggestion is that women have to deal with that shiat every DAY and men might deal with it a couple times a year.

I'm not suggesting what you said isn't true, but how do you know that? I mean really know that?

I have no idea what it's like to be a woman; why do women always seem to "know" how wonderful it is to be a man?


Why are people so continually surprised by research that was done decades ago that has been a media staple since?
 
2013-01-19 09:48:50 AM  

shastacola: God, the male butthurt comments in this thread are really pathetic. I look forward to the day when your 14 year old daughter get the shiat scared out of her by some 30 year old stranger who thinks it's his right to comment on her ass. Make sure she understands that she shouldn't dress so slutty or be so attractive.Tell her to get used to it,she's got many years of strangers with a bizarre sense of entitlement judging her attire and figure.


Yeah.

Women never judge each other on these things.
 
2013-01-19 09:49:09 AM  

WhippingBoy: Do you think that this doesn't happen to men? When I was younger, I had my ass groped (without my consent) a number of times.


Never happend to me even once. Stop wearing tight jeans, you slut, and women will stop harassing you.
 
2013-01-19 09:49:50 AM  
I wonder how many people in this thread would have the courage to make their comments in person.  I wonder whether they actually conduct themselves in this barbaric way, or if it's just the Internet Misogyny Brigade.

I have  never treated women -or anyone else- as depicted in tfa, but I've certainly had to deal with the effects  of their foolishness.  And, with rare exceptions, if someone is behaving with all the civility of a gutter snipe it is a man doing it.  I really dislike having to prove that those jackasses don't represent my gender, and threads like this do not help.
 
2013-01-19 09:50:01 AM  

Billy Bathsalt: I work in construction, and my crew takes some pride in being pleasant to passers-by. We were on a job downtown, and lots of women would walk by on their way to work. Of course we would notice them, and got to the point where we were exchanging "good mornings" with the friendlier ones. Then the electricians arrived, including a punk kid who spent a lot of time harassing women walking by. After that, most of the women crossed the street or took a different route to work.
Jerks who act like the ones the author describes are ruining things for men as well as women.


That punk kid would be kicked off my site and would never be allowed back. I do a lot of construction work on college campuses and we are surrounded by young ladies all day. I make it very clear to my guys that they are not to talk to anyone that isn't working in our job even if they are spoken to first. I understand that if an attractive girl walks by the guys are going to look but if it is more than a couple seconds they will be getting a warning or asked to pick up their tools. If I or my bosses get so much as one harassment complaint it could mean that we are not allowed back and that is a potential loss of millions of dollars.
 
2013-01-19 09:50:01 AM  

medius: and the day comes when they stop looking


No it doesn't. A woman is always prey regardless of her age. You watched too many bad TV shows. My 92 year old grandma got hit on by her neighbor last year. He was creepy about it too.
 
2013-01-19 09:50:16 AM  
Well Princess, who put a pea under your mattress?
 
2013-01-19 09:50:23 AM  

Bored Horde: WhippingBoy: Lehk: WhippingBoy: 1. There's a subtle suggestion that this type of harassment and/or unwanted attention NEVER happens to men

no, the suggestion is that women have to deal with that shiat every DAY and men might deal with it a couple times a year.

I'm not suggesting what you said isn't true, but how do you know that? I mean really know that?

I have no idea what it's like to be a woman; why do women always seem to "know" how wonderful it is to be a man?

Why are people so continually surprised by research that was done decades ago that has been a media staple since?


i212.photobucket.com
 
2013-01-19 09:51:03 AM  

Lenny_da_Hog: shastacola: God, the male butthurt comments in this thread are really pathetic. I look forward to the day when your 14 year old daughter get the shiat scared out of her by some 30 year old stranger who thinks it's his right to comment on her ass. Make sure she understands that she shouldn't dress so slutty or be so attractive.Tell her to get used to it,she's got many years of strangers with a bizarre sense of entitlement judging her attire and figure.

Yeah.

Women never judge each other on these things.


There's a difference between silently judging someone's looks and having complete strangers commenting on your "taco".but I bet you knew that.
 
2013-01-19 09:51:28 AM  

TiiiMMMaHHH: jimmajim: So the consensus in this thread is that the guys described in TFA did nothing wrong? There's no point in criticizing their behavior, boys will be boys, right? wink wink nudge nudge.

Actually, it's a sign of a much larger social problem. Susan Faludi describes it well in her book "backlash". Basically, when boys don't have men in their lives, and their mothers are checked out (usually fallout from a bad marriage) they turn to a peer-based family. When immature, stupid boys get together, they do ALL kinds of crazy shiat to get laughs and prove alpha status in the pack. It's like that joke about the one white boy with a group of blacks. You KNOW he did something crazy to earn their respect.

I'm not justifying poor behavior, just pointing out that it's not going anywhere. We would need to stabilize families, and their incomes. THEN we'd need a generation, or two, or three of that stability to remove the stink from the genes and family tree.

Considering our politicians actively legislate AGAINST an entire society of strong nuclear families, this will never happen. We need to put a 20%+ tariff on all imports, open our textile mills again, create even more blue collar jobs on top of that. THEN we can start the 3 generation plus process of reteaching our children how to be morally strong, ethically brave. Instead, our 'leaders' are cutting budgets to social services, convincing children that bad people are everywhere, and the only way to stop them is to take away our society's access to firearms.

SIMPLY PUT: broken, impovershed families are great breeding grounds for future consumers, soldiers and derps. And we need those stupid women just as much as those stupid men. How else are we going to keep america stocked with fodder for it's armies and advertisements?

/Rant
//29 yr old man, sick of the shiat.


Feminists will still blame the 'patriarchy', even though all these bad behaving boys had no fathers, who typically teach their sons to be better than that.
 
2013-01-19 09:51:32 AM  

cabbyman: [slowfacts.files.wordpress.com image 600x367]


Holy crap, that's a beautiful revolver. It's like anti-steampunk.

Want.

/sadly, it's probably heinously expensive
 
2013-01-19 09:51:33 AM  

DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: DrPainMD: Don't worry DNWPG. If your real-life personality is anything like your Fark personality, they'll leave you alone as soon as they get to know you.

Yea, because the last guy who groped my ass in a crowded subway car wanted to know what I thought of the dual Higgs discovery, you moron.


It couldn't be both?
 
2013-01-19 09:51:40 AM  

shastacola: God, the male butthurt comments in this thread are really pathetic. I look forward to the day when your 14 year old daughter get the shiat scared out of her by some 30 year old stranger who thinks it's his right to comment on her ass. Make sure she understands that she shouldn't dress so slutty or be so attractive.Tell her to get used to it,she's got many years of strangers with a bizarre sense of entitlement judging her attire and figure.


Really? That would make you happy?

Why is it that men are never allowed to defend themselves or express their own opinions based on their experiences?

For what it's worth, my daughter has FASD; I'm terrified of the day when men start to notice her. You should be happy about that, I guess.
 
2013-01-19 09:51:41 AM  

Lenny_da_Hog: shastacola: God, the male butthurt comments in this thread are really pathetic. I look forward to the day when your 14 year old daughter get the shiat scared out of her by some 30 year old stranger who thinks it's his right to comment on her ass. Make sure she understands that she shouldn't dress so slutty or be so attractive.Tell her to get used to it,she's got many years of strangers with a bizarre sense of entitlement judging her attire and figure.

Yeah.

Women never judge each other on these things.


Being biatchy is not the same thing as being predatory.
 
2013-01-19 09:52:12 AM  

Bored Horde: omeganuepsilon: That level of paranoia is not normal. That is what she is describing, there's a world of difference between due vigilance and the paranoia of a simpleton. Just maybe, it's a case of the victim gravitating towards them.(AW as people above documented).

That kind of cat-calling is, by and large, a regional thing, the only attainable solution is to move to someplace that activities like that aren't common. I get a kick out of at the bottom of the article it says she loves Chicago. That's an obvious lie if half the populace is like that.

Who needs an app to see what they're doing wrong? It's not that society at large does not think it's wrong, it's that the perpetrators of such behavior DO NOT CARE.

Men's hair gets pointed out well enough, The Donald for a great example, or Nicholas Cage's. So *drumroll* that argument is irrelevant.

Two examples of celebrities.

In the business world, if you're a man, as long as your hair is short and under control, everyone ignores it. It's a check box item. Women's hair gets graded. Men's clothing is the same - it's pass/fail, either the suit is clean, pressed, and fits or it's bad. Women's clothing gets graded for appearance, fashion, and riding the thin line between dowdy and slutty.

If you don't understand this then you're not ready to participate in a discussion about the matter - go read some farking books.


Men are graded on their height. Women can control all of the above. Men can not control their height.
 
2013-01-19 09:53:07 AM  
 
2013-01-19 09:53:22 AM  
I don't know why women keep trying to tell men what it's like, because men are never going to get it. Ever. No matter what a woman says about this, no matter how many analogies she makes, no matter how she says it, men will respond with... pretty much everything in this thread. They will continue to act like untrained dogs around women they want to fark and shiat all over women they deem too old or too ugly to fark.
 
2013-01-19 09:53:25 AM  
I was riding my bike up a hill the other day, and a carful of women paced right up next to me...they were all "Oooh...lookit dat!"

Finally, one yelled "nice ass!" Then they sped away screaming in laughter.

Still not sure if they were serious...but sure made my day. I gained about 5 mph the rest of the ride.
 
2013-01-19 09:53:36 AM  
The author sounds like a narcissist.
 
2013-01-19 09:53:42 AM  
Everywhere I go, people hassle me for my massive dong. Why, just the other day I was in Target, idly browsing the aisles, when an 8 yr old girl grabbed her mom's hand and went "Mommy, look at that man's peeeeeeeeennnnnniiiiiisssss." Mommy's face got embarrased, and I watched her eyes track down to my crotch where they got very wide. "Oh my" she said. Still staring at my crotch she said "that's some equipment you got there." Her daughter put in "Mommy, his balls are huge too".

I cannot tell you how angry this makes me, as it happens everywhere I go. Women point and whisper to each other. They'll come up and ask me "is that thing real?" They'll stare obviously at my crotch when I trying to complete a simple farking transaction with them. Some of them get bold, and ask if they can touch it, and some just reach out and grab it. They catcall all the time.

My friends have told me that if I want to stop being harassed and looked at, I should stop wearing skintight pants and my bulge enhancing underwear, and I should not go out of house wearing nothing but leggings.

But I maintain that it is the fault of society. I have a right to wear whatever I want, deem comfortable or fashionable, and I take it as a woman's responsibility to control herself and not stare at my junk. I didn't give you permission to look or comment, so you don't have that right, ladies.

/jailbreak the matriarchy
//amidoingitrite?
 
2013-01-19 09:53:52 AM  
Well, she could give burqas a try. That way she would be dressed the same as every other woman, and nobody would be able to treat her based on how she looks.
 
2013-01-19 09:54:11 AM  

Bored Horde: WhippingBoy: Lehk: WhippingBoy: 1. There's a subtle suggestion that this type of harassment and/or unwanted attention NEVER happens to men

no, the suggestion is that women have to deal with that shiat every DAY and men might deal with it a couple times a year.

I'm not suggesting what you said isn't true, but how do you know that? I mean really know that?

I have no idea what it's like to be a woman; why do women always seem to "know" how wonderful it is to be a man?

Why are people so continually surprised by research that was done decades ago that has been a media staple since?


Perhaps an individuals life experiences can't be neatly summed up or categorized into old research. I dunno.
 
2013-01-19 09:55:06 AM  

Bored Horde: WhippingBoy: Lehk: WhippingBoy: 1. There's a subtle suggestion that this type of harassment and/or unwanted attention NEVER happens to men

no, the suggestion is that women have to deal with that shiat every DAY and men might deal with it a couple times a year.

I'm not suggesting what you said isn't true, but how do you know that? I mean really know that?

I have no idea what it's like to be a woman; why do women always seem to "know" how wonderful it is to be a man?

Why are people so continually surprised by research that was done decades ago that has been a media staple since?


I know right? This is freshman media studies/sociology/psych level stuff. There are entire bookshelves devoted to the subject matter in any college library and any decent bookstore. Studies going back to the 70s ffs.
 
2013-01-19 09:55:21 AM  

ReverendJasen: WhippingBoy: Do you think that this doesn't happen to men? When I was younger, I had my ass groped (without my consent) a number of times.

Never happend to me even once. Stop wearing tight jeans, you slut, and women will stop harassing you.


It wasn't just women...
 
2013-01-19 09:55:51 AM  

shastacola: Lenny_da_Hog: shastacola: God, the male butthurt comments in this thread are really pathetic. I look forward to the day when your 14 year old daughter get the shiat scared out of her by some 30 year old stranger who thinks it's his right to comment on her ass. Make sure she understands that she shouldn't dress so slutty or be so attractive.Tell her to get used to it,she's got many years of strangers with a bizarre sense of entitlement judging her attire and figure.

Yeah.

Women never judge each other on these things.

There's a difference between silently judging someone's looks and having complete strangers commenting on your "taco".but I bet you knew that.


Yeah. And it's funny that all the attractive women are only friends with other attractive women, and feel entitled to tell the others how ugly they are.

Have you never been in a high school, college campus, church, or bar?
 
2013-01-19 09:56:12 AM  

WhippingBoy: Perhaps an individuals life experiences can't be neatly summed up or categorized into old research. I dunno.


Dont go to college. You will fail.
 
2013-01-19 09:56:48 AM  

Lenny_da_Hog: Have you never been in a high school, college campus, church, or bar?


Have you ever been to college?
 
2013-01-19 09:57:17 AM  

quickdraw: WhippingBoy: Perhaps an individuals life experiences can't be neatly summed up or categorized into old research. I dunno.

Dont go to college. You will fail.


I went. I didn't.
 
2013-01-19 09:57:23 AM  
If you don't want attention, wear sweatpants without "juicy" printed on the back. Or mom jeans. I have years of experience in looking unattractive.

I wish this were a valid strategy, but creepers gon' creep regardless of clothing. I cannot tell you how many times I have gone out looking like absolute death in sweatpants, sweatshirt, hair in a pony tail, no makeup, visibly ill etc. and have been harassed by dbags, and I can't think of a single female friend who hasn't also experienced this. It's definitely befuddling because common sense would dictate that looking as if you just rolled out of bed with the plague would deter creeps but no, for some reason it doesn't.

/I'm not some great beauty either, I'm a solid 4 on a good day with effort put in
//also, once you pass a certain cup size, no matter how covered up you are, creeps will still take notice
 
2013-01-19 09:58:38 AM  

Smock Pot: I don't know why women keep trying to tell men what it's like, because men are never going to get it. Ever. No matter what a woman says about this, no matter how many analogies she makes, no matter how she says it, men will respond with... pretty much everything in this thread. They will continue to act like untrained dogs around women they want to fark and shiat all over women they deem too old or too ugly to fark.


Yep, this is true.
 
2013-01-19 09:58:50 AM  

Lenny_da_Hog: DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: ExperianScaresCthulhu:

I see what you're saying, and agree with it. Again, leads back to the ho doth protest too much. She's not really, she's bragging. See also: hos who make a point of pointing out their BMI when it's on the low end.

We raise our daughters to be doctors, lawyers, and citizens, but then some people treat these women like walking sex toys, and when the young women point this out because they discover how frightening and frustrating it gets, they can't POSSIBLY be serious.

Gee, with women spending billions and billions of dollars on clothing, hair styling, salons, manicures, pedicures, make-up, fashion magazines, Cosmo, etc., etc., to compete with each other, I don't understand why,

The problem is perpetuated by women.

This is a case of people outside of the bell curve realizing they were born on the wrong planet. It's like an atheist wondering why religious people are religious.


Over and over again, bad behavior is being excused away, this time its women's fault for the fashion industry, because only the right shade of toenail polish can prevent harassment.
 
2013-01-19 09:59:15 AM  
Maybe guys would stop acting like this if women stopped rewarding them by sleeping with them while they are young and pretty and then marrying the nice guy when she's old and used up....
 
2013-01-19 09:59:24 AM  

TiiiMMMaHHH: someonelse: letrole: Sexual harrassment is the wrong man noticing your tits.

You can't troll a thread where the most blatantly ignorant opinions are already being expressed in earnest, dude. You can't make a sh*thouse smell worse.

I'm in a commited relationship with a woman 8 years older than me. He's not trolling, it's true. She's old enough that she fears not being attractive on a regular basis. She's real enough that she'll flat out admit that she doesn't want gross dudes oggling her. If an attractive man checks her out or compliments her, it makes her feel great because it means (on a genetic level at least) that she's viable. Basic programming at it's finest.


His/her name is The Troll, and he is always and forever trolling. You know this, or ought to.

Nothing in your second paragraph is particularly relevant. Your girlfriend likes being complimented, therefore what? What basic logic are you using?
 
2013-01-19 09:59:40 AM  
The "just wait 20 years from now when no one will look at you" comments here seem to be made with a fair amount of indignance and hurt feelings. I get the impression that anyone who would say that has been the man catcalling some woman on the street and doesn't like that anyone would view this behavior negatively, and/or has felt pretty burned in the past/present when any of their attentions (regardless of politeness level) have been rebuffed because they weren't attractive enough to the other person.

Just a thought.
 
2013-01-19 09:59:41 AM  

Lenny_da_Hog: shastacola: Lenny_da_Hog: shastacola: God, the male butthurt comments in this thread are really pathetic. I look forward to the day when your 14 year old daughter get the shiat scared out of her by some 30 year old stranger who thinks it's his right to comment on her ass. Make sure she understands that she shouldn't dress so slutty or be so attractive.Tell her to get used to it,she's got many years of strangers with a bizarre sense of entitlement judging her attire and figure.

Yeah.

Women never judge each other on these things.

There's a difference between silently judging someone's looks and having complete strangers commenting on your "taco".but I bet you knew that.

Yeah. And it's funny that all the attractive women are only friends with other attractive women, and feel entitled to tell the others how ugly they are.

Have you never been in a high school, college campus, church, or bar?


Which has what to do with strangers making sexually suggestive comments to women? Is your argument that some women can be mean to each other so women deserve to have their vaginas,asses,legs,breasts,etc. publicly and loudly judged?
 
2013-01-19 10:00:28 AM  
i379.photobucket.com

this is why men dont respect you


/not saying its right,
 
2013-01-19 10:01:01 AM  

WhippingBoy: Why is it that men are never allowed to defend themselves or express their own opinions based on their experiences?


What are you defending? Are you one of the predatory jerks that harass women? If not, stop defending them. It's just like when "good" cops defend their asshole brethren who do bad things. It makes them all look bad.

All the men in here defending the assholes who harass women are making all of us look bad.
 
2013-01-19 10:01:16 AM  
Many women seem to be like internet trolls... they do everything they can to get attention, and if you ignore them, they go around the bend trying to make sure they get your attention.
 
2013-01-19 10:02:35 AM  

WhippingBoy: Smock Pot: I don't know why women keep trying to tell men what it's like, because men are never going to get it. Ever. No matter what a woman says about this, no matter how many analogies she makes, no matter how she says it, men will respond with... pretty much everything in this thread. They will continue to act like untrained dogs around women they want to fark and shiat all over women they deem too old or too ugly to fark.

Yep, this is true.


No, it's bullshiat. Not all men are like that, especially not the ones like me who have daughters they want to see succeed. Quit lumping us all together.
 
2013-01-19 10:02:40 AM  
Sounds fat.
 
2013-01-19 10:02:50 AM  

Onkel Buck: [i379.photobucket.com image 500x375]

this is why men dont respect you


/not saying its right,


Well, true.

So many women seem to slink back to obviously abusive relationships not reluctantly, but willingly and gleefully.

Why should men respect women when they can't even respect themselves?
 
2013-01-19 10:02:50 AM  

ReverendJasen: WhippingBoy: Why is it that men are never allowed to defend themselves or express their own opinions based on their experiences?

What are you defending? Are you one of the predatory jerks that harass women? If not, stop defending them. It's just like when "good" cops defend their asshole brethren who do bad things. It makes them all look bad.

All the men in here defending the assholes who harass women are making all of us look bad.


Of course not. I'm defending "men" in general. Just because some men are jerks doesn't mean that all men are jerks. That's all I'm trying to say.
 
2013-01-19 10:03:01 AM  

ExperianScaresCthulhu: Men are graded on their height. Women can control all of the above. Men can not control their height.


So your point is that you are judged on one physical attribute and women are judged on dozens of them - some of which they can control? And your using that to show how mens lives are just the same as womens?
 
2013-01-19 10:03:50 AM  
Who lit the fuse on her tampon?
 
2013-01-19 10:03:52 AM  

quickdraw: PanicMan: I didn't know Saturday morning was "sexist asshole" time here. Good to know.

Yeah Im gonna mark it on my calendar from now on.

Bored Horde: WhippingBoy: DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: DrPainMD: Don't worry DNWPG. If your real-life personality is anything like your Fark personality, they'll leave you alone as soon as they get to know you.

Yea, because the last guy who groped my ass in a crowded subway car wanted to know what I thought of the dual Higgs discovery, you moron.

Do you think that this doesn't happen to men? When I was younger, I had my ass groped (without my consent) a number of times. I imagine that men who are more attractive then me have experienced this even more.

Groping a woman carries the implicit threat of rape in a way that a woman groping a man doesn't. However uncomfortable you felt being groped, remember that women are taught that it's their fault they got groped, that all men are groping raping monsters and it's the woman's fault if they let them get close.

For you, it was the simple act of violation of your body. For women, it's that AND a reminder that their body's positive assets belong to society.

While I agree with you completely you are assuming it was a woman who groped him. However the point still stands that far more women get raped then men and it is a much bigger threat getting your ass grabbed.

The thing is every single woman I know has had to deal with the potential for sexual harassment as an ongoing part of her daily life. And even though I have reached the supposedly "invisible" age I still have to deal with that shiat. And I assure you I am thoroughly average in appearance. OTOH my hubby who is very tall and very handsome has never ever been sexually harassed.


Are you sure he'd tell you if he was?
 
2013-01-19 10:04:21 AM  
Wow.  Been a Farker for a long time.  Seldom see such near universal mouth-breathing, male douchebaggery so early and often in a thread.  TFA's author was completely reasonable and 90% of the comments from you assclowns is "hurrr get me a sammich durr be glad dudes are even looking at you hurrr she needs to get laid."

So glad I don't have a daughter.
 
2013-01-19 10:04:53 AM  

WhippingBoy: I'm defending "men" in general.


Why?
 
2013-01-19 10:05:06 AM  

SnarfVader: WhippingBoy: Smock Pot: I don't know why women keep trying to tell men what it's like, because men are never going to get it. Ever. No matter what a woman says about this, no matter how many analogies she makes, no matter how she says it, men will respond with... pretty much everything in this thread. They will continue to act like untrained dogs around women they want to fark and shiat all over women they deem too old or too ugly to fark.

Yep, this is true.

No, it's bullshiat. Not all men are like that, especially not the ones like me who have daughters they want to see succeed. Quit lumping us all together.


You missed the point. Of course not all men are like that. But the ones that are certainly don't care about what a woman experiences, so it's somewhat futile to keep trying to explain it to them.
 
2013-01-19 10:05:10 AM  

DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: Lenny_da_Hog: DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: ExperianScaresCthulhu:

I see what you're saying, and agree with it. Again, leads back to the ho doth protest too much. She's not really, she's bragging. See also: hos who make a point of pointing out their BMI when it's on the low end.

We raise our daughters to be doctors, lawyers, and citizens, but then some people treat these women like walking sex toys, and when the young women point this out because they discover how frightening and frustrating it gets, they can't POSSIBLY be serious.

Gee, with women spending billions and billions of dollars on clothing, hair styling, salons, manicures, pedicures, make-up, fashion magazines, Cosmo, etc., etc., to compete with each other, I don't understand why,

The problem is perpetuated by women.

This is a case of people outside of the bell curve realizing they were born on the wrong planet. It's like an atheist wondering why religious people are religious.

Over and over again, bad behavior is being excused away, this time its women's fault for the fashion industry, because only the right shade of toenail polish can prevent harassment.


It's not being explained away. It's a fact of culture that isn't going to change no matter how much you biatch about it. Women compete with each other on the basis of sexual attraction, and enjoy doing it. A loud few are offended by that same behavior, but even in the 60s and 70s when this conversation was at its peak, women were still competing with clothing and make-up.

Religionists drive me up a wall. They're always coming to my door and telling me what an asshole I am for not being them. They infiltrate schools, politics, and anywhere else they can slime through the cracks.

It's the way the world is. You're not going to change it, any more than I'm going to change the minds of people who think they're going to live forever in the clouds. The best you're going to be able to do is to find and hang out with people who share your own values.
 
2013-01-19 10:05:32 AM  

SnarfVader: WhippingBoy: Smock Pot: I don't know why women keep trying to tell men what it's like, because men are never going to get it. Ever. No matter what a woman says about this, no matter how many analogies she makes, no matter how she says it, men will respond with... pretty much everything in this thread. They will continue to act like untrained dogs around women they want to fark and shiat all over women they deem too old or too ugly to fark.

Yep, this is true.

No, it's bullshiat. Not all men are like that, especially not the ones like me who have daughters they want to see succeed. Quit lumping us all together.


There are two options here:

Women and men together deem that not all men are aholes, and not all women are attention grabbing whores, and that there is some truth in the complaints on both sides

OR

We get really angry and demonize everyone on the other side.

I bet I know which one fark is going to go with this morning, how about you?
 
2013-01-19 10:05:36 AM  

DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: ExperianScaresCthulhu:

I see what you're saying, and agree with it. Again, leads back to the ho doth protest too much. She's not really, she's bragging. See also: hos who make a point of pointing out their BMI when it's on the low end.

We raise our daughters to be doctors, lawyers, and citizens, but then some people treat these women like walking sex toys, and when the young women point this out because they discover how frightening and frustrating it gets, they can't POSSIBLY be serious.


It depends on whether someone is bragging, or sending mixed signals. If someone is complaining about attention, while seeking attention (especially when they use the attention to climb higher), then no, no one should take them seriously.

But yes, unwanted attention sucks ass, because of the power plays you mentioned in your earlier posts. The fear is about the fifth panel in weltallica's comic, the 'Fk you, then!' that follows rejection, the implicit 'I'll make you pay for rejecting me'. Right? (There's also not a little 'men being men instead of women; if men found ways to do all that looking good crap like women want it done, there'd be less fear and more acceptance -- see also Billy Bathsalt's construction story.)
 
2013-01-19 10:05:37 AM  

Head_Shot: quickdraw: PanicMan: I didn't know Saturday morning was "sexist asshole" time here. Good to know.

Yeah Im gonna mark it on my calendar from now on.

Bored Horde: WhippingBoy: DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: DrPainMD: Don't worry DNWPG. If your real-life personality is anything like your Fark personality, they'll leave you alone as soon as they get to know you.

Yea, because the last guy who groped my ass in a crowded subway car wanted to know what I thought of the dual Higgs discovery, you moron.

Do you think that this doesn't happen to men? When I was younger, I had my ass groped (without my consent) a number of times. I imagine that men who are more attractive then me have experienced this even more.

Groping a woman carries the implicit threat of rape in a way that a woman groping a man doesn't. However uncomfortable you felt being groped, remember that women are taught that it's their fault they got groped, that all men are groping raping monsters and it's the woman's fault if they let them get close.

For you, it was the simple act of violation of your body. For women, it's that AND a reminder that their body's positive assets belong to society.

While I agree with you completely you are assuming it was a woman who groped him. However the point still stands that far more women get raped then men and it is a much bigger threat getting your ass grabbed.

The thing is every single woman I know has had to deal with the potential for sexual harassment as an ongoing part of her daily life. And even though I have reached the supposedly "invisible" age I still have to deal with that shiat. And I assure you I am thoroughly average in appearance. OTOH my hubby who is very tall and very handsome has never ever been sexually harassed.

Are you sure he'd tell you if he was?


And if he did, how many months of "ZOMG YOU'RE CHEATING ON ME WITH A PRETTIER WOMAN" insecurity drama would he have to endure for mentioning someone made unwanted remarks to him?
 
2013-01-19 10:07:22 AM  

Howie Spankowitz: Wow.  Been a Farker for a long time.  Seldom see such near universal mouth-breathing, male douchebaggery so early and often in a thread.  TFA's author was completely reasonable and 90% of the comments from you assclowns is "hurrr get me a sammich durr be glad dudes are even looking at you hurrr she needs to get laid."

So glad I don't have a daughter.


The article lost me with the "Jailbreak the Patriarchy" app.
 
2013-01-19 10:08:06 AM  
She seems to think she is more attractive than she really is, I can tell she used to be overweight and now is a cute chubby, but those complexes that develop during the fat years tend to run deep through an ex fatties life.  So while they want to be the cheerleader, they become pseudo hipsters and even worse, bloggers.   And no man is then good looking enough for them, and they hate the really pretty girls.

Here are some bits from her other ramblings, cause you know they never seen a white chick in India, and there are no hot women in Spain which forces Spaniards to hit on sandal wearing hostel dwellers.

" Sometimes, I go to countries where the presence of a wandering single white woman is an attraction in and of itself. There are probably at least a hundred Indians with surreptitious cell phone pictures of me; apparently I was just that photogenic ."


"He approached me, and said something in Catalan I didn't understand. I responded in Spanish, telling him to have a good night, and waving him away. For a block, he hovered just a few feet over my shoulder. He approached again, lightly grabbing my elbow. Though the precise language of his proposition was lost on me, the gist was clear: American girls all have a price, what was mine? "



grassroots.groupon.com

www.womensadventuremagazine.com
 
2013-01-19 10:08:13 AM  
I bet this chick has nice cans.
 
2013-01-19 10:08:20 AM  

someonelse: TiiiMMMaHHH: someonelse: letrole: Sexual harrassment is the wrong man noticing your tits.

You can't troll a thread where the most blatantly ignorant opinions are already being expressed in earnest, dude. You can't make a sh*thouse smell worse.

I'm in a commited relationship with a woman 8 years older than me. He's not trolling, it's true. She's old enough that she fears not being attractive on a regular basis. She's real enough that she'll flat out admit that she doesn't want gross dudes oggling her. If an attractive man checks her out or compliments her, it makes her feel great because it means (on a genetic level at least) that she's viable. Basic programming at it's finest.

His/her name is The Troll, and he is always and forever trolling. You know this, or ought to.

Nothing in your second paragraph is particularly relevant. Your girlfriend likes being complimented, therefore what? What basic logic are you using?


That an HONEST woman will tell you: When ugly guys hit on me, I wince. When cute guys hit on me, I think for a second "I'd hit it. He has good genes". WOMEN LIE ABOUT THIS FACTOR ALL THE TIME.

Difference usually being; a mature woman values her partner more than her orgasms.
 
2013-01-19 10:09:07 AM  

Head_Shot: quickdraw: PanicMan: I didn't know Saturday morning was "sexist asshole" time here. Good to know.

Yeah Im gonna mark it on my calendar from now on.

Bored Horde: WhippingBoy: DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: DrPainMD: Don't worry DNWPG. If your real-life personality is anything like your Fark personality, they'll leave you alone as soon as they get to know you.

Yea, because the last guy who groped my ass in a crowded subway car wanted to know what I thought of the dual Higgs discovery, you moron.

Do you think that this doesn't happen to men? When I was younger, I had my ass groped (without my consent) a number of times. I imagine that men who are more attractive then me have experienced this even more.

Groping a woman carries the implicit threat of rape in a way that a woman groping a man doesn't. However uncomfortable you felt being groped, remember that women are taught that it's their fault they got groped, that all men are groping raping monsters and it's the woman's fault if they let them get close.

For you, it was the simple act of violation of your body. For women, it's that AND a reminder that their body's positive assets belong to society.

While I agree with you completely you are assuming it was a woman who groped him. However the point still stands that far more women get raped then men and it is a much bigger threat getting your ass grabbed.

The thing is every single woman I know has had to deal with the potential for sexual harassment as an ongoing part of her daily life. And even though I have reached the supposedly "invisible" age I still have to deal with that shiat. And I assure you I am thoroughly average in appearance. OTOH my hubby who is very tall and very handsome has never ever been sexually harassed.

Are you sure he'd tell you if he was?


Why wouldnt he? Were both adults. *shrug*
 
2013-01-19 10:09:18 AM  

PanicMan: I didn't know Saturday morning was "sexist asshole" time here. Good to know.


Right? I'm trying to enjoy my morning screwdriver with a smile.
 
2013-01-19 10:09:25 AM  

WhippingBoy: SnarfVader: WhippingBoy: Smock Pot: I don't know why women keep trying to tell men what it's like, because men are never going to get it. Ever. No matter what a woman says about this, no matter how many analogies she makes, no matter how she says it, men will respond with... pretty much everything in this thread. They will continue to act like untrained dogs around women they want to fark and shiat all over women they deem too old or too ugly to fark.

Yep, this is true.

No, it's bullshiat. Not all men are like that, especially not the ones like me who have daughters they want to see succeed. Quit lumping us all together.

You missed the point. Of course not all men are like that. But the ones that are certainly don't care about what a woman experiences, so it's somewhat futile to keep trying to explain it to them.


I know...right?!  Women...just shut up and let it happen.  Men will never learn, so don't even try.  WhippingBoy has spoken.
 
2013-01-19 10:09:27 AM  

Howie Spankowitz: Wow.  Been a Farker for a long time.  Seldom see such near universal mouth-breathing, male douchebaggery so early and often in a thread.  TFA's author was completely reasonable and 90% of the comments from you assclowns is "hurrr get me a sammich durr be glad dudes are even looking at you hurrr she needs to get laid."

So glad I don't have a daughter.


It's the main page, it's the weekend, and it's gender-related. That's like a perfect storm of moronic HERP and misogynist DERP.
 
2013-01-19 10:09:45 AM  

quickdraw: WhippingBoy: I'm defending "men" in general.

Why?


Why? I dunno... because there just might be some men out there who are decent human beings?
 
2013-01-19 10:10:12 AM  

Parmenius: I wonder how many people in this thread would have the courage to make their comments in person.  I wonder whether they actually conduct themselves in this barbaric way, or if it's just the Internet Misogyny Brigade.

I have  never treated women -or anyone else- as depicted in tfa, but I've certainly had to deal with the effects  of their foolishness.   And, with rare exceptions, if someone is behaving with all the civility of a gutter snipe it is a man doing it.  I really dislike having to prove that those jackasses don't represent my gender, and threads like this do not help.


You've never worked in all-female offices as the lone man, have you ;) (anyway, I still see what you're saying.)
 
2013-01-19 10:10:13 AM  
You mean... we live in a society that objectifies women?

Look at the magazines that cater to men, and women. What do you see?

Women being chastised for being too big or too bony.... too tall or too short... not curvy or too curvy... too independent or too devoted... dressed well enough dressed 'too' well... not sexy enough or too sexy etc. And that's the publications that are targeted AT WOMEN. And the best part... if you don't 'love yourself', that's your own fault.

Men's magazines? Here's some cool shiat, some interesting shiat, and some sexy women.

And a csb moment... friend of the gf reads Men's Health rather than the women-oriented alternative. The articles are less banal, and the recipes are easier to make into reality.
 
2013-01-19 10:10:51 AM  

Honest Bender: Don't worry. Some day you'll hit that right age where you become invisible to men. Then it's fun to watch women freak out that they can't get attention anymore.


This is about the time they get implants and start banging their personal trainer.

/seen it happen
 
2013-01-19 10:10:54 AM  

shastacola: Which has what to do with strangers making sexually suggestive comments to women? Is your argument that some women can be mean to each other so women deserve to have their vaginas,asses,legs,breasts,etc. publicly and loudly judged?


It has the same thing to do with me walking into a bar and having someone judge me on my ability to fight, or starting a fight with me because they don't like my clothing. I hate that, but it's going to happen. And there are always women who love to see violent men.

People compete sexually, women and men alike. Call them jerks, move on, and find people who share your values.
 
2013-01-19 10:11:25 AM  

ElectricPeterTork: Howie Spankowitz: Wow.  Been a Farker for a long time.  Seldom see such near universal mouth-breathing, male douchebaggery so early and often in a thread.  TFA's author was completely reasonable and 90% of the comments from you assclowns is "hurrr get me a sammich durr be glad dudes are even looking at you hurrr she needs to get laid."

So glad I don't have a daughter.

The article lost me with the "Jailbreak the Patriarchy" app.


If you allow something trivial like that to cause you to dismiss a well-articulated and reasonable argument, then you're probably someone who wouldn't understand her point to begin with.
 
2013-01-19 10:11:52 AM  

ElectricPeterTork: And if he did, how many months of "ZOMG YOU'RE CHEATING ON ME WITH A PRETTIER WOMAN" insecurity drama would he have to endure for mentioning someone made unwanted remarks to him?


lol - none. We're adults.
 
2013-01-19 10:12:47 AM  

SnarfVader: WhippingBoy: Smock Pot: I don't know why women keep trying to tell men what it's like, because men are never going to get it. Ever. No matter what a woman says about this, no matter how many analogies she makes, no matter how she says it, men will respond with... pretty much everything in this thread. They will continue to act like untrained dogs around women they want to fark and shiat all over women they deem too old or too ugly to fark.

Yep, this is true.

No, it's bullshiat. Not all men are like that, especially not the ones like me who have daughters they want to see succeed. Quit lumping us all together.


Favorited, just because you sound like an awesome dad.
 
2013-01-19 10:13:01 AM  
Your blog REALLY sucks
 
2013-01-19 10:13:29 AM  

someonelse: Howie Spankowitz: Wow.  Been a Farker for a long time.  Seldom see such near universal mouth-breathing, male douchebaggery so early and often in a thread.  TFA's author was completely reasonable and 90% of the comments from you assclowns is "hurrr get me a sammich durr be glad dudes are even looking at you hurrr she needs to get laid."

So glad I don't have a daughter.

It's the main page, it's the weekend, and it's gender-related. That's like a perfect storm of moronic HERP and misogynist DERP.


True. Don't even know why I waded in here.  Bored this morning.
 
2013-01-19 10:13:33 AM  
Wow. There's a lot of biatches in here that must have had an especially long walk of shame this morning.
 
2013-01-19 10:14:07 AM  

TiiiMMMaHHH: someonelse: TiiiMMMaHHH: someonelse: letrole: Sexual harrassment is the wrong man noticing your tits.

You can't troll a thread where the most blatantly ignorant opinions are already being expressed in earnest, dude. You can't make a sh*thouse smell worse.

I'm in a commited relationship with a woman 8 years older than me. He's not trolling, it's true. She's old enough that she fears not being attractive on a regular basis. She's real enough that she'll flat out admit that she doesn't want gross dudes oggling her. If an attractive man checks her out or compliments her, it makes her feel great because it means (on a genetic level at least) that she's viable. Basic programming at it's finest.

His/her name is The Troll, and he is always and forever trolling. You know this, or ought to.

Nothing in your second paragraph is particularly relevant. Your girlfriend likes being complimented, therefore what? What basic logic are you using?

That an HONEST woman will tell you: When ugly guys hit on me, I wince. When cute guys hit on me, I think for a second "I'd hit it. He has good genes". WOMEN LIE ABOUT THIS FACTOR ALL THE TIME.

Difference usually being; a mature woman values her partner more than her orgasms.


ALL CAPS DOES NOT MAKE YOUR GIRLFRIEND'S ANECDOTES ANY MORE IMPORTANT OR REVEALING.

I am sorry about her orgasms, though.
 
2013-01-19 10:14:58 AM  

WhippingBoy: quickdraw: WhippingBoy: I'm defending "men" in general.

Why?

Why? I dunno... because there just might be some men out there who are decent human beings?


Nowhere in that article does it imply there are no good men. FFS just because a women says lots of men act like assholes doesnt mean all men do. If I said the Olive Garden sucks would you feel the need to defend all Italian restaurants?
 
2013-01-19 10:15:05 AM  

Elegy: SnarfVader: WhippingBoy: Smock Pot: I don't know why women keep trying to tell men what it's like, because men are never going to get it. Ever. No matter what a woman says about this, no matter how many analogies she makes, no matter how she says it, men will respond with... pretty much everything in this thread. They will continue to act like untrained dogs around women they want to fark and shiat all over women they deem too old or too ugly to fark.

Yep, this is true.

No, it's bullshiat. Not all men are like that, especially not the ones like me who have daughters they want to see succeed. Quit lumping us all together.

There are two options here:

Women and men together deem that not all men are aholes, and not all women are attention grabbing whores, and that there is some truth in the complaints on both sides

OR

We get really angry and demonize everyone on the other side.

I bet I know which one fark is going to go with this morning, how about you?


Good point. I've already been called bigoted in this thread (by another guy) for asking that male bashing end too. We men are all stupid neanderthals according to the advertising media.
 
2013-01-19 10:15:17 AM  

Howie Spankowitz: ElectricPeterTork: Howie Spankowitz: Wow.  Been a Farker for a long time.  Seldom see such near universal mouth-breathing, male douchebaggery so early and often in a thread.  TFA's author was completely reasonable and 90% of the comments from you assclowns is "hurrr get me a sammich durr be glad dudes are even looking at you hurrr she needs to get laid."

So glad I don't have a daughter.

The article lost me with the "Jailbreak the Patriarchy" app.

If you allow something trivial like that to cause you to dismiss a well-articulated and reasonable argument, then you're probably someone who wouldn't understand her point to begin with.


No, it makes me think "Hm... she has an agenda she's pushing, and pushing hard", and I tend to doubt anything written after discovering the author is, basically, a shill.

It's like if someone had written what seems like a fairly intelligent article about the 2012 election, and cited the eye-opening polling information they read at Unskewed Polls.
 
2013-01-19 10:15:19 AM  
thefamily.com
 
2013-01-19 10:15:50 AM  

Howie Spankowitz: I know...right?!  Women...just shut up and let it happen.  Men will never learn, so don't even try.  WhippingBoy has spoken.


You're missing the point. And your painting with a very broad brush.
 
2013-01-19 10:16:12 AM  
My perspective changed when I had a daughter. For the first time ever I saw the world from the eyes of a girl. And the view was not pretty. Now I fully support my wife's insistence on single sex education. Boys are animals and belong in cages.
 
2013-01-19 10:16:22 AM  

Onkel Buck: [i379.photobucket.com image 500x375]

this is why men dont respect you

/not saying its right,


Rihanna's a known size (and drama) queen, and Chris Brown has (photographic proof of) the size.
 
2013-01-19 10:17:09 AM  

WhippingBoy: Howie Spankowitz: I know...right?!  Women...just shut up and let it happen.  Men will never learn, so don't even try.  WhippingBoy has spoken.

You're missing the point. And your painting with a very broad brush.


SEXIST! MISOGYNISTIC!
 
2013-01-19 10:17:12 AM  
I want to hear about the "almost rape" on Barcelona. Did a foreigner make eye contact? Smile at her? Buy her a drink? Poor, poor attractive lady.
 
2013-01-19 10:17:18 AM  

quickdraw: WhippingBoy: quickdraw: WhippingBoy: I'm defending "men" in general.

Why?

Why? I dunno... because there just might be some men out there who are decent human beings?

Nowhere in that article does it imply there are no good men. FFS just because a women says lots of men act like assholes doesnt mean all men do. If I said the Olive Garden sucks would you feel the need to defend all Italian restaurants?


Yes, exactly, that's entirely my point. I'm not sure what we're arguing about.
 
2013-01-19 10:18:07 AM  

TiiiMMMaHHH: jimmajim: So the consensus in this thread is that the guys described in TFA did nothing wrong? There's no point in criticizing their behavior, boys will be boys, right? wink wink nudge nudge.

Actually, it's a sign of a much larger social problem. Susan Faludi describes it well in her book "backlash". Basically, when boys don't have men in their lives, and their mothers are checked out (usually fallout from a bad marriage) they turn to a peer-based family. When immature, stupid boys get together, they do ALL kinds of crazy shiat to get laughs and prove alpha status in the pack. It's like that joke about the one white boy with a group of blacks. You KNOW he did something crazy to earn their respect.

I'm not justifying poor behavior, just pointing out that it's not going anywhere. We would need to stabilize families, and their incomes. THEN we'd need a generation, or two, or three of that stability to remove the stink from the genes and family tree.

Considering our politicians actively legislate AGAINST an entire society of strong nuclear families, this will never happen. We need to put a 20%+ tariff on all imports, open our textile mills again, create even more blue collar jobs on top of that. THEN we can start the 3 generation plus process of reteaching our children how to be morally strong, ethically brave. Instead, our 'leaders' are cutting budgets to social services, convincing children that bad people are everywhere, and the only way to stop them is to take away our society's access to firearms.

SIMPLY PUT: broken, impovershed families are great breeding grounds for future consumers, soldiers and derps. And we need those stupid women just as much as those stupid men. How else are we going to keep america stocked with fodder for it's armies and advertisements?

/Rant
//29 yr old man, sick of the shiat.


I know it makes me a douche, but this comment needs to be brought out from underneath all the derp it's buried under. America has many problems, and they all trace back to one common thread: The destruction of the nuclear family. If that common thread doesn't bother you, than how do you have the right to complain about the subsequent fallout?? If we all play armchair Dr. Phil, but the end result is a bunch of mutual masturbation on a fark thread, then what's the point? Tomorrow is going to look a lot like today at this rate..

/soapbox away, continue on with your oh so clever humor that has NEVER been used before.
 
2013-01-19 10:18:54 AM  

WhippingBoy: quickdraw: WhippingBoy: quickdraw: WhippingBoy: I'm defending "men" in general.

Why?

Why? I dunno... because there just might be some men out there who are decent human beings?

Nowhere in that article does it imply there are no good men. FFS just because a women says lots of men act like assholes doesnt mean all men do. If I said the Olive Garden sucks would you feel the need to defend all Italian restaurants?

Yes, exactly, that's entirely my point. I'm not sure what we're arguing about.


So you sympathize with the author?
 
2013-01-19 10:20:25 AM  

Howie Spankowitz: Wow.  Been a Farker for a long time.  Seldom see such near universal mouth-breathing, male douchebaggery so early and often in a thread.  TFA's author was completely reasonable and 90% of the comments from you assclowns is "hurrr get me a sammich durr be glad dudes are even looking at you hurrr she needs to get laid."

So glad I don't have a daughter.


I read the article expecting to roll my eyes, but found it to be reasonable. The comments in TFA were also reasonable and not too "you go girl!!", then I clicked on these comments and wondered why I come to Fark (Is it always like this? did I miss that?)
Glad to see your comment.

/last time I was "cat-called" was NYE and a guy in his 20s said to me as I walked past "You look very nice tonight." Now that's a compliment!
 
2013-01-19 10:22:20 AM  
Reminds me of the article about an attractive woman who, because of her looks, deserved a rich man and an apartment with views of Central Park.

It was one of those advice columns or something like that. Anyhow, a stock broker responded with calling her a depreciating asset.

He described this depreciating asset as one that will never get better with age and brings nothing else but looks and high maintenance costs to the investment. There are no long term gains and the investment loses in the long (or maybe short) term.

I think this woman would complain if we lived in a country that required burqas. Hey, maybe that should be her solution (of course not forced, like in other countries). Dress up in a black burqa. She wouldn't have those comments about her.
 
2013-01-19 10:22:24 AM  

quickdraw: ExperianScaresCthulhu: Men are graded on their height. Women can control all of the above. Men can not control their height.

So your point is that you are judged on one physical attribute and women are judged on dozens of them - some of which they can control? And your using that to show how mens lives are just the same as womens?


Women can control those 'dozens of things'. Men cannot. Bottom line. Women have it easier than men when it comes to using the softer skills to get what they want. Also bottom line.

Shorter men are screwed in ways the 'nice guys' look at, shake their heads and sigh saying 'there but for the grace of God..' You're right that no, men's lives and women's lives are not the same. But it's not like men don't face their own kinds of harassments, rejections, and attempts by others to overpower them on the daily. Shorter men are going to experience it more than taller men. And, unlike women, they have no social outlets and no social sympathy for fighting against it. Shrug.
 
2013-01-19 10:22:57 AM  

cabbyman: [thefamily.com image 360x190]


or this

3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-01-19 10:23:31 AM  

WhippingBoy: Howie Spankowitz: I know...right?!  Women...just shut up and let it happen.  Men will never learn, so don't even try.  WhippingBoy has spoken.

You're missing the point. And your painting with a very broad brush.


I don't think I'm doing either.  I think it was pretty clear you were making the argument that this behavior is inevitable so women should just stop complaining about it.  Please disabuse me of this if you can.  Perhaps I missed some of your posts where you clarified it.

ElectricPeterTork: Howie Spankowitz: ElectricPeterTork: Howie Spankowitz: Wow.  Been a Farker for a long time.  Seldom see such near universal mouth-breathing, male douchebaggery so early and often in a thread.  TFA's author was completely reasonable and 90% of the comments from you assclowns is "hurrr get me a sammich durr be glad dudes are even looking at you hurrr she needs to get laid."

So glad I don't have a daughter.

The article lost me with the "Jailbreak the Patriarchy" app.

If you allow something trivial like that to cause you to dismiss a well-articulated and reasonable argument, then you're probably someone who wouldn't understand her point to begin with.

No, it makes me think "Hm... she has an agenda she's pushing, and pushing hard", and I tend to doubt anything written after discovering the author is, basically, a shill.

It's like if someone had written what seems like a fairly intelligent article about the 2012 election, and cited the eye-opening polling information they read at Unskewed Polls.


That analogy makes no sense at all.  You should feel bad for making it.  And of course she has an agenda.  She wrote an opinion piece, implying that she has a strong point of view on a subject matter.  Neither promoting the app nor having an agenda make her point invalid.
 
2013-01-19 10:25:11 AM  

quickdraw: WhippingBoy: quickdraw: WhippingBoy: quickdraw: WhippingBoy: I'm defending "men" in general.

Why?

Why? I dunno... because there just might be some men out there who are decent human beings?

Nowhere in that article does it imply there are no good men. FFS just because a women says lots of men act like assholes doesnt mean all men do. If I said the Olive Garden sucks would you feel the need to defend all Italian restaurants?

Yes, exactly, that's entirely my point. I'm not sure what we're arguing about.

So you sympathize with the author?


I think she's overly dramatic, self-centred, narcissistic, and pushing an agenda, but yes, I do sympathize with her.
What I have a problem with is the use of the all-encompassing word "men", as if all men participated and/or condoned in such behaviour. If I met a woman (or women) who exhibited stereotypical "biatchy" behaviour, would it be fair of me to say that "women are biatches"? Of course not.
 
2013-01-19 10:26:36 AM  

SnarfVader: WhippingBoy: Smock Pot: I don't know why women keep trying to tell men what it's like, because men are never going to get it. Ever. No matter what a woman says about this, no matter how many analogies she makes, no matter how she says it, men will respond with... pretty much everything in this thread. They will continue to act like untrained dogs around women they want to fark and shiat all over women they deem too old or too ugly to fark.

Yep, this is true.

No, it's bullshiat. Not all men are like that, especially not the ones like me who have daughters they want to see succeed. Quit lumping us all together.


If you aren't like the men described in the article, great. Be an example and stand up for women when you see this shiat.

Just understand that as a man, you're still never gonna get it.
 
2013-01-19 10:26:39 AM  

ExperianScaresCthulhu: quickdraw: ExperianScaresCthulhu: Men are graded on their height. Women can control all of the above. Men can not control their height.

So your point is that you are judged on one physical attribute and women are judged on dozens of them - some of which they can control? And your using that to show how mens lives are just the same as womens?

Women can control those 'dozens of things'. Men cannot. Bottom line. Women have it easier than men when it comes to using the softer skills to get what they want. Also bottom line.

Shorter men are screwed in ways the 'nice guys' look at, shake their heads and sigh saying 'there but for the grace of God..' You're right that no, men's lives and women's lives are not the same. But it's not like men don't face their own kinds of harassments, rejections, and attempts by others to overpower them on the daily. Shorter men are going to experience it more than taller men. And, unlike women, they have no social outlets and no social sympathy for fighting against it. Shrug.


I get it yes - it sucks to be a short guy. What does that have to do with never feeling safe when you leave the house just because of your gender? Do people openly mock you for your height as an adult? Do they yell about how youre the perfect height to suck their dick? Because those are the things that happen to short women.
 
2013-01-19 10:26:44 AM  
Maybe the first time someone comments on your ass in public you'll take it as a compliment, but what about the next 12 times?

I'd become confident that I had a nice ass and the more women compliment it, the more I'll feel like I'm doing a good job of maintaining it.
 
2013-01-19 10:28:01 AM  

TiiiMMMaHHH: someonelse: TiiiMMMaHHH: someonelse: letrole: Sexual harrassment is the wrong man noticing your tits.

You can't troll a thread where the most blatantly ignorant opinions are already being expressed in earnest, dude. You can't make a sh*thouse smell worse.

I'm in a commited relationship with a woman 8 years older than me. He's not trolling, it's true. She's old enough that she fears not being attractive on a regular basis. She's real enough that she'll flat out admit that she doesn't want gross dudes oggling her. If an attractive man checks her out or compliments her, it makes her feel great because it means (on a genetic level at least) that she's viable. Basic programming at it's finest.

His/her name is The Troll, and he is always and forever trolling. You know this, or ought to.

Nothing in your second paragraph is particularly relevant. Your girlfriend likes being complimented, therefore what? What basic logic are you using?

That an HONEST woman will tell you: When ugly guys hit on me, I wince. When cute guys hit on me, I think for a second "I'd hit it. He has good genes". WOMEN LIE ABOUT THIS FACTOR ALL THE TIME.

Difference usually being; a mature woman values her partner more than her orgasms.


And the other side of that difference being, the mature man values his orgasms more than his partner? Is that where all the 'I love my wife but she won't fk me anymore so I'll get some on the side and it'll be cool because I gotta nut but that doesn't mean I don't love my wife when I nut in some other broad' stuff comes from?
 
2013-01-19 10:28:06 AM  

Bedstead Polisher: Howie Spankowitz: Wow.  Been a Farker for a long time.  Seldom see such near universal mouth-breathing, male douchebaggery so early and often in a thread.  TFA's author was completely reasonable and 90% of the comments from you assclowns is "hurrr get me a sammich durr be glad dudes are even looking at you hurrr she needs to get laid."

So glad I don't have a daughter.

I read the article expecting to roll my eyes, but found it to be reasonable. The comments in TFA were also reasonable and not too "you go girl!!", then I clicked on these comments and wondered why I come to Fark (Is it always like this? did I miss that?)
Glad to see your comment.

/last time I was "cat-called" was NYE and a guy in his 20s said to me as I walked past "You look very nice tonight." Now that's a compliment!


It used to be referred to as "gentlemanly behavior."  I have never seen a woman react negatively to a nice, appropriate comment offered in a non-threatening manner, without hip thrusts, catcalls, unwanted touching or following.  But the consensus in this thread from my enlightened brethren is that you should just be happy that you are receiving any attention at all, given that, you know, someday your boobs might sag and all.
 
2013-01-19 10:28:38 AM  
I'm guessing another fattie, crying on the interweb.

/dnrta
 
2013-01-19 10:28:53 AM  

WhippingBoy: quickdraw: WhippingBoy: quickdraw: WhippingBoy: quickdraw: WhippingBoy: I'm defending "men" in general.

Why?

Why? I dunno... because there just might be some men out there who are decent human beings?

Nowhere in that article does it imply there are no good men. FFS just because a women says lots of men act like assholes doesnt mean all men do. If I said the Olive Garden sucks would you feel the need to defend all Italian restaurants?

Yes, exactly, that's entirely my point. I'm not sure what we're arguing about.

So you sympathize with the author?

I think she's overly dramatic, self-centred, narcissistic, and pushing an agenda, but yes, I do sympathize with her.
What I have a problem with is the use of the all-encompassing word "men", as if all men participated and/or condoned in such behaviour. If I met a woman (or women) who exhibited stereotypical "biatchy" behaviour, would it be fair of me to say that "women are biatches"? Of course not.


No, using one woman's behavior to paint the entirety of womanhood as biatchy is bad, wrong, evil, and MISOGYNY!

But using one man's behavior to paint all men as evil rapists, well, hey, they're just men. They deserve it.
 
2013-01-19 10:29:02 AM  

phillyguy1547: To the author:

I'm a dude. I'm a 5'10" 190 lb dude. I still sometimes walk to the other side of the street if someone who looks like bad news is coming toward me. I'd still get a cab rather than stand at a bus stop with someone who gives me the creeps. It's called common sense.

Quit assuming that you're unfairly forced to have some common sense because you're pretty and a girl.

As to the rude comments. Words only have power if you let them. Ignore them.

Keep doing what you're doing - i.e. taking the smart steps to keep your self safe.... but just lose the "poor pretty me" attitude about doing it.


Thank you for being the first. This behaviour can happen at any time, any where, to any one. Be aware of your surroundings at all times. It can save your life.
 
2013-01-19 10:29:04 AM  
I just wonder, who is the target audience for this article?

I'm pretty sure it's not men who creep on women.
 
2013-01-19 10:29:10 AM  

WhippingBoy: quickdraw: WhippingBoy: quickdraw: WhippingBoy: quickdraw: WhippingBoy: I'm defending "men" in general.

Why?

Why? I dunno... because there just might be some men out there who are decent human beings?

Nowhere in that article does it imply there are no good men. FFS just because a women says lots of men act like assholes doesnt mean all men do. If I said the Olive Garden sucks would you feel the need to defend all Italian restaurants?

Yes, exactly, that's entirely my point. I'm not sure what we're arguing about.

So you sympathize with the author?

I think she's overly dramatic, self-centred, narcissistic, and pushing an agenda, but yes, I do sympathize with her.
What I have a problem with is the use of the all-encompassing word "men", as if all men participated and/or condoned in such behaviour. If I met a woman (or women) who exhibited stereotypical "biatchy" behaviour, would it be fair of me to say that "women are biatches"? Of course not.


No one is saying all men are assholes. No one.

/cripes. white guys sure know how to nurse a persecution complex
 
2013-01-19 10:29:46 AM  
Men will not make cat calls at women if they perceive they will be shot-down. Men will indeed make cat calls if they think they have a chance of some sort. This is why slutty-hot girls at bars get many drinks for free, but women with poise and natural beauty get passed up as "fridgid biatches".

The apparent-ease-of-farking factor is what mostly decides who gets cat-called.
 
2013-01-19 10:29:53 AM  
Seriously though, yoga pants.
 
2013-01-19 10:30:31 AM  

Smock Pot: If you aren't like the men described in the article, great. Be an example and stand up for women when you see this shiat.


Why did you feel the need to tell him this? He's already proved that he'll "stand up for women" if the situation warrants.
 
2013-01-19 10:31:07 AM  

breadprincess: If you don't want attention, wear sweatpants without "juicy" printed on the back. Or mom jeans. I have years of experience in looking unattractive.

I wish this were a valid strategy, but creepers gon' creep regardless of clothing. I cannot tell you how many times I have gone out looking like absolute death in sweatpants, sweatshirt, hair in a pony tail, no makeup, visibly ill etc. and have been harassed by dbags, and I can't think of a single female friend who hasn't also experienced this. It's definitely befuddling because common sense would dictate that looking as if you just rolled out of bed with the plague would deter creeps but no, for some reason it doesn't.

/I'm not some great beauty either, I'm a solid 4 on a good day with effort put in
//also, once you pass a certain cup size, no matter how covered up you are, creeps will still take notice


Yeah, but if you go too far into decrepit...men might think you'll do anything for meth/crack money.
 
2013-01-19 10:31:21 AM  

quickdraw: ExperianScaresCthulhu: quickdraw: ExperianScaresCthulhu: Men are graded on their height. Women can control all of the above. Men can not control their height.

So your point is that you are judged on one physical attribute and women are judged on dozens of them - some of which they can control? And your using that to show how mens lives are just the same as womens?

Women can control those 'dozens of things'. Men cannot. Bottom line. Women have it easier than men when it comes to using the softer skills to get what they want. Also bottom line.

Shorter men are screwed in ways the 'nice guys' look at, shake their heads and sigh saying 'there but for the grace of God..' You're right that no, men's lives and women's lives are not the same. But it's not like men don't face their own kinds of harassments, rejections, and attempts by others to overpower them on the daily. Shorter men are going to experience it more than taller men. And, unlike women, they have no social outlets and no social sympathy for fighting against it. Shrug.

I get it yes - it sucks to be a short guy. What does that have to do with never feeling safe when you leave the house just because of your gender? Do people openly mock you for your height as an adult? Do they yell about how youre the perfect height to suck their dick? Because those are the things that happen to short women.


I am a short guy, and I held the door open for a shorter girl in a bar and she said loudly "sorry honey you have to be a least six feet to ride this"

A woman at my office constantly comments on my package "you must have steel belted underwear to hold that thing in check"

Also big guys with inferiority complexes tend to bump into you, call your shorty, buddy, big guy chief, and condescend.

But I ain't complaining I have always had good looking girlfriends, have a hot wife, and banged a lot of tall guys old ladies.
 
2013-01-19 10:31:29 AM  

StoPPeRmobile: I'm guessing another fattie, crying on the interweb.

/dnrta


And that's exactly what it is, as far as you know.

Those last five words can be safely applied to almost any uninformed claim you care to make, by the way. So have at it.
 
2013-01-19 10:32:05 AM  

Smock Pot: SnarfVader: WhippingBoy: Smock Pot: I don't know why women keep trying to tell men what it's like, because men are never going to get it. Ever. No matter what a woman says about this, no matter how many analogies she makes, no matter how she says it, men will respond with... pretty much everything in this thread. They will continue to act like untrained dogs around women they want to fark and shiat all over women they deem too old or too ugly to fark.

Yep, this is true.

No, it's bullshiat. Not all men are like that, especially not the ones like me who have daughters they want to see succeed. Quit lumping us all together.

If you aren't like the men described in the article, great. Be an example and stand up for women when you see this shiat.

Just understand that as a man, you're still never gonna get it.


I *never* see men act like this, which is why I think the article is bullshiat.
 
2013-01-19 10:32:10 AM  

WhippingBoy: Smock Pot: If you aren't like the men described in the article, great. Be an example and stand up for women when you see this shiat.

Why did you feel the need to tell him this? He's already proved that he'll "stand up for women" if the situation warrants.


Late to thread, just coming off a graveyard shift, sick with a cold - take your pick.
 
2013-01-19 10:32:14 AM  

quickdraw: Bored Horde: WhippingBoy: Lehk: WhippingBoy: 1. There's a subtle suggestion that this type of harassment and/or unwanted attention NEVER happens to men

no, the suggestion is that women have to deal with that shiat every DAY and men might deal with it a couple times a year.

I'm not suggesting what you said isn't true, but how do you know that? I mean really know that?

I have no idea what it's like to be a woman; why do women always seem to "know" how wonderful it is to be a man?

Why are people so continually surprised by research that was done decades ago that has been a media staple since?

I know right? This is freshman media studies/sociology/psych level stuff. There are entire bookshelves devoted to the subject matter in any college library and any decent bookstore. Studies going back to the 70s ffs.


it sure is a good thing nothing has changed since the seventies right?
 
2013-01-19 10:32:26 AM  

KiwDaWabbit: I just wonder, who is the target audience for this article?

I'm pretty sure it's not men who creep on women.


Yes. She says that in the article. So she is most likely trying to reach those people who dont think they condone this behavior but who enable it by pretending it doesnt exist.

Plenty of examples of which apparently read fark on Saturday morning.
 
2013-01-19 10:33:31 AM  

Pandar: The "just wait 20 years from now when no one will look at you" comments here seem to be made with a fair amount of indignance and hurt feelings. I get the impression that anyone who would say that has been the man catcalling some woman on the street


Actually, I'm the guy who's gotten laid a whole lot more now than I did years ago because of woman around 40. When I was younger I never ever could have conceived of dating someone more than about a year older than me. Lately I find I'm the one getting asked out far more often and it's almost always by a woman a few years older than me. It's not a bad thing, I met some great women, had a lot of sex and some good friendships come out of things.

I've also got woman as friends who are around that age and have heard more complaints about being invisible than anything else. The hard truth is woman are scared of being invisible and spend billions of dollars every year to avoid it. I'm not defending the guys who are jerks are grope woman's butts, but let's be real and not try to define the exception as the rule. That would be like me thinking all women are cheating liars just because my ex-wife was.

I've also never cat called a woman in my life, it always struck me as a sure way to get a woman to /not/ want to have sex with you.
 
2013-01-19 10:34:06 AM  

Lenny_da_Hog: shastacola: Lenny_da_Hog: shastacola: God, the male butthurt comments in this thread are really pathetic. I look forward to the day when your 14 year old daughter get the shiat scared out of her by some 30 year old stranger who thinks it's his right to comment on her ass. Make sure she understands that she shouldn't dress so slutty or be so attractive.Tell her to get used to it,she's got many years of strangers with a bizarre sense of entitlement judging her attire and figure.

Yeah.

Women never judge each other on these things.

There's a difference between silently judging someone's looks and having complete strangers commenting on your "taco".but I bet you knew that.

Yeah. And it's funny that all the attractive women are only friends with other attractive women, and feel entitled to tell the others how ugly they are.

Have you never been in a high school, college campus, church, or bar?


False.

Attractive women always keep at least one fat/ugly girl around for comparative purposes.
 
2013-01-19 10:34:36 AM  
2013-01-19 09:24:57 AM
DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: DrPainMD: Don't worry DNWPG. If your real-life personality is anything like your Fark personality, they'll leave you alone as soon as they get to know you.

Yea, because the last guy who groped my ass in a crowded subway car wanted to know what I thought of the dual Higgs discovery, you moron.

You sound fat.
 
2013-01-19 10:35:09 AM  
FEMALE LIFE PLAN:
0-15 force men to give you attention by getting in their faces
15-30 complain about too much attention from men
30-100 force men to give you attention by getting in their faces
 
2013-01-19 10:35:51 AM  
TFA: "I am reasonably attractive and was at a bar and some guy hit on me. I was in yoga pants another time and some guy stopped and looked at me and even said something!

Poor repressed me. Stop the patriarchy!"
 
2013-01-19 10:37:50 AM  

gilgigamesh: Smock Pot: SnarfVader: WhippingBoy: Smock Pot: I don't know why women keep trying to tell men what it's like, because men are never going to get it. Ever. No matter what a woman says about this, no matter how many analogies she makes, no matter how she says it, men will respond with... pretty much everything in this thread. They will continue to act like untrained dogs around women they want to fark and shiat all over women they deem too old or too ugly to fark.

Yep, this is true.

No, it's bullshiat. Not all men are like that, especially not the ones like me who have daughters they want to see succeed. Quit lumping us all together.

If you aren't like the men described in the article, great. Be an example and stand up for women when you see this shiat.

Just understand that as a man, you're still never gonna get it.

I *never* see men act like this, which is why I think the article is bullshiat.


Maybe that's the real issue. I wonder if cat calls are a rural vs urban thing. I just can't imagine myself or anybody I know doing this or groping women on the subway. I guess I really can't relate.
 
2013-01-19 10:38:06 AM  

theflatline: I am a short guy, and I held the door open for a shorter girl in a bar and she said loudly "sorry honey you have to be a least six feet to ride this"

A woman at my office constantly comments on my package "you must have steel belted underwear to hold that thing in check"

Also big guys with inferiority complexes tend to bump into you, call your shorty, buddy, big guy chief, and condescend.


ok - so one chick was rude, the woman in your office should be brought up on harassment charges and yes there are bullies in the world. Life isnt fair. But what does any of that have to do with the writer's concerns? She isnt writing about the difficulties of being a short guy. You can do that on your blog if you want.

This is an article about the difficulties of being female in our culture. Just because you're not happy in your skin has nothing to do with the very real problems women face every day from harassment.
 
2013-01-19 10:38:20 AM  
Much thanks to my benefactor for the TF subscription!
 
2013-01-19 10:38:21 AM  

Howie Spankowitz: Wow.  Been a Farker for a long time.  Seldom see such near universal mouth-breathing, male douchebaggery so early and often in a thread.  TFA's author was completely reasonable and 90% of the comments from you assclowns is "hurrr get me a sammich durr be glad dudes are even looking at you hurrr she needs to get laid."

So glad I don't have a daughter.


Wow, indeed. I've just made a lot of inductions into my Douchebag list.
 
2013-01-19 10:38:22 AM  

THE GREAT NAME: FEMALE LIFE PLAN:
0-15 force men to give you attention by getting in their faces
15-30 complain about too much attention from men
30-100 force men to give you attention by getting in their faces


I know, right? 18-month-old girls are the worst. Always demanding attention. Feed me, change my diaper, feed me again. It's awful.
 
2013-01-19 10:38:43 AM  
Wow, are really greenlighting crappy feminist blogs now??

Your blog sucks.
 
2013-01-19 10:39:45 AM  

quickdraw: WhippingBoy: quickdraw: WhippingBoy: I'm defending "men" in general.

Why?

Why? I dunno... because there just might be some men out there who are decent human beings?

Nowhere in that article does it imply there are no good men. FFS just because a women says lots of men act like assholes doesnt mean all men do. If I said the Olive Garden sucks would you feel the need to defend all Italian restaurants?


Blacks have to. Why not generic racial-not-specific men?
 
2013-01-19 10:40:03 AM  

SnarfVader: gilgigamesh: Smock Pot: SnarfVader: WhippingBoy: Smock Pot: I don't know why women keep trying to tell men what it's like, because men are never going to get it. Ever. No matter what a woman says about this, no matter how many analogies she makes, no matter how she says it, men will respond with... pretty much everything in this thread. They will continue to act like untrained dogs around women they want to fark and shiat all over women they deem too old or too ugly to fark.

Yep, this is true.

No, it's bullshiat. Not all men are like that, especially not the ones like me who have daughters they want to see succeed. Quit lumping us all together.

If you aren't like the men described in the article, great. Be an example and stand up for women when you see this shiat.

Just understand that as a man, you're still never gonna get it.

I *never* see men act like this, which is why I think the article is bullshiat.

Maybe that's the real issue. I wonder if cat calls are a rural vs urban thing. I just can't imagine myself or anybody I know doing this or groping women on the subway. I guess I really can't relate.


This is definitely big city behavior. Small town harassment is of a different kind.
 
2013-01-19 10:40:07 AM  
The social convention is that men approach women, and not the other way around. So men deal with rejection, and women deal with unwanted advances. The unintended consequence appears to be that women find themselves victims of men who take the "approach women" part to the extreme. The complaint in the article is one about drunks, bros, teens, drug addicts, etc - all people who have poor judgment. If the tables were turned and women were expected to approach men, the "psycho hose-beast" stories would be norm.

I'd imagine women would feel less threatened than insulted if this country took rape seriously, but there's a particular political party that seems hellbent on making sure that doesn't happen.

/I like your yoga pants.
//But I'm not going to hang out of the side of a car and tell you that.
 
2013-01-19 10:40:40 AM  

quickdraw: Head_Shot: quickdraw: PanicMan: I didn't know Saturday morning was "sexist asshole" time here. Good to know.

Yeah Im gonna mark it on my calendar from now on.

Bored Horde: WhippingBoy: DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: DrPainMD: Don't worry DNWPG. If your real-life personality is anything like your Fark personality, they'll leave you alone as soon as they get to know you.

Yea, because the last guy who groped my ass in a crowded subway car wanted to know what I thought of the dual Higgs discovery, you moron.

Do you think that this doesn't happen to men? When I was younger, I had my ass groped (without my consent) a number of times. I imagine that men who are more attractive then me have experienced this even more.

Groping a woman carries the implicit threat of rape in a way that a woman groping a man doesn't. However uncomfortable you felt being groped, remember that women are taught that it's their fault they got groped, that all men are groping raping monsters and it's the woman's fault if they let them get close.

For you, it was the simple act of violation of your body. For women, it's that AND a reminder that their body's positive assets belong to society.

While I agree with you completely you are assuming it was a woman who groped him. However the point still stands that far more women get raped then men and it is a much bigger threat getting your ass grabbed.

The thing is every single woman I know has had to deal with the potential for sexual harassment as an ongoing part of her daily life. And even though I have reached the supposedly "invisible" age I still have to deal with that shiat. And I assure you I am thoroughly average in appearance. OTOH my hubby who is very tall and very handsome has never ever been sexually harassed.

Are you sure he'd tell you if he was?

Why wouldnt he? Were both adults. *shrug*


That's pretty naive.
 
2013-01-19 10:41:01 AM  

THE GREAT NAME: FEMALE LIFE PLAN:
0-15 force men to give you attention by getting in their faces
15-30 complain about too much attention from men
30-100 force men to give you attention by getting in their faces


^^^^
This, by the way, is what actual misogyny looks like.
 
2013-01-19 10:41:02 AM  

ExperianScaresCthulhu: quickdraw: WhippingBoy: quickdraw: WhippingBoy: I'm defending "men" in general.

Why?

Why? I dunno... because there just might be some men out there who are decent human beings?

Nowhere in that article does it imply there are no good men. FFS just because a women says lots of men act like assholes doesnt mean all men do. If I said the Olive Garden sucks would you feel the need to defend all Italian restaurants?

Blacks have to. Why not generic racial-not-specific men?


Blacks have to what? Eat at Olive Garden? Really not sure what youre getting at here...
 
2013-01-19 10:41:11 AM  

Bedstead Polisher: Howie Spankowitz: Wow.  Been a Farker for a long time.  Seldom see such near universal mouth-breathing, male douchebaggery so early and often in a thread.  TFA's author was completely reasonable and 90% of the comments from you assclowns is "hurrr get me a sammich durr be glad dudes are even looking at you hurrr she needs to get laid."

So glad I don't have a daughter.

I read the article expecting to roll my eyes, but found it to be reasonable. The comments in TFA were also reasonable and not too "you go girl!!", then I clicked on these comments and wondered why I come to Fark (Is it always like this? did I miss that?)
Glad to see your comment.

/last time I was "cat-called" was NYE and a guy in his 20s said to me as I walked past "You look very nice tonight." Now that's a compliment!


Maybe everyone's periods are synching up.
 
2013-01-19 10:41:40 AM  

Ooba Tooba: I want to hear about the "almost rape" on Barcelona. Did a foreigner make eye contact? Smile at her? Buy her a drink? Poor, poor attractive lady.


upload.wikimedia.org
Some pedastals take longer than others to disintegrate.
 
2013-01-19 10:42:52 AM  
From the comments:

Bear Lisa • a month ago −
That's why I carry a knife. If I'm walking home at night time that motherfarker is in my hot little hand just waiting....

Her hot little hand intrigues me.
 
2013-01-19 10:43:00 AM  

Head_Shot: quickdraw: Head_Shot: quickdraw: PanicMan: I didn't know Saturday morning was "sexist asshole" time here. Good to know.

Yeah Im gonna mark it on my calendar from now on.

Bored Horde: WhippingBoy: DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: DrPainMD: Don't worry DNWPG. If your real-life personality is anything like your Fark personality, they'll leave you alone as soon as they get to know you.

Yea, because the last guy who groped my ass in a crowded subway car wanted to know what I thought of the dual Higgs discovery, you moron.

Do you think that this doesn't happen to men? When I was younger, I had my ass groped (without my consent) a number of times. I imagine that men who are more attractive then me have experienced this even more.

Groping a woman carries the implicit threat of rape in a way that a woman groping a man doesn't. However uncomfortable you felt being groped, remember that women are taught that it's their fault they got groped, that all men are groping raping monsters and it's the woman's fault if they let them get close.

For you, it was the simple act of violation of your body. For women, it's that AND a reminder that their body's positive assets belong to society.

While I agree with you completely you are assuming it was a woman who groped him. However the point still stands that far more women get raped then men and it is a much bigger threat getting your ass grabbed.

The thing is every single woman I know has had to deal with the potential for sexual harassment as an ongoing part of her daily life. And even though I have reached the supposedly "invisible" age I still have to deal with that shiat. And I assure you I am thoroughly average in appearance. OTOH my hubby who is very tall and very handsome has never ever been sexually harassed.

Are you sure he'd tell you if he was?

Why wouldnt he? Were both adults. *shrug*

That's pretty naive.


LOL! Youre hilarious. Alright lets say hes terrified to tell me if some guy groped his ass at a trade show or something. Why wouldnt he tell me if he had been harassed before I met him?
 
2013-01-19 10:43:10 AM  

someonelse: THE GREAT NAME: FEMALE LIFE PLAN:
0-15 force men to give you attention by getting in their faces
15-30 complain about too much attention from men
30-100 force men to give you attention by getting in their faces

^^^^
This, by the way, is what actual misogyny looks like.


Well apparently you haven't had to push your way through a group of 100 year old women on the street, getting in your face for attention. It's degrading and humiliating, and it doesn't smell all that great.
 
2013-01-19 10:43:25 AM  

halfof33: Wow, are really greenlighting crappy feminist blogs now??

Your blog sucks.


As opposed to, say, jammiewearingfool or the unskewed polls guy or any number of other crap blogs that FARK links to all the time? You're shocked, shocked!
 
2013-01-19 10:44:46 AM  
Jerks and b*tches do have one thing in common. Jerks don't like each other, either and neither do b*tches. They also think somebody "wins". This is not a modern phenomenon. As far as "the patriarchy", by all means, replace whatever is left of that with something that works better. For everybody. It might mean you don't win, though. *sigh* Now you go home, and you decent people. Be decent.
 
2013-01-19 10:45:02 AM  
I read this as, "I've got a huge ass and black guys like to comment on it."

Jailbreak the patriarchy! lol
 
2013-01-19 10:45:03 AM  
Here's a fun game: Replace the word "men" in feminist articles with the word "blacks" and see how the article reads.
 
2013-01-19 10:46:22 AM  

LouDobbsAwaaaay: someonelse: THE GREAT NAME: FEMALE LIFE PLAN:
0-15 force men to give you attention by getting in their faces
15-30 complain about too much attention from men
30-100 force men to give you attention by getting in their faces

^^^^
This, by the way, is what actual misogyny looks like.

Well apparently you haven't had to push your way through a group of 100 year old women on the street, getting in your face for attention. It's degrading and humiliating, and it doesn't smell all that great.


True, but I've never been to Florida. I've heard tell of their notorious old lady gangs down there. Downright threatening, I'm told.
 
2013-01-19 10:46:54 AM  
The world is not a perfect Candyland custom tailored for you and only you. Jerks and biatches both exist.


dealwithit.jpg
 
2013-01-19 10:46:59 AM  

quickdraw: ExperianScaresCthulhu: quickdraw: ExperianScaresCthulhu: Men are graded on their height. Women can control all of the above. Men can not control their height.

So your point is that you are judged on one physical attribute and women are judged on dozens of them - some of which they can control? And your using that to show how mens lives are just the same as womens?

Women can control those 'dozens of things'. Men cannot. Bottom line. Women have it easier than men when it comes to using the softer skills to get what they want. Also bottom line.

Shorter men are screwed in ways the 'nice guys' look at, shake their heads and sigh saying 'there but for the grace of God..' You're right that no, men's lives and women's lives are not the same. But it's not like men don't face their own kinds of harassments, rejections, and attempts by others to overpower them on the daily. Shorter men are going to experience it more than taller men. And, unlike women, they have no social outlets and no social sympathy for fighting against it. Shrug.

I get it yes - it sucks to be a short guy. What does that have to do with never feeling safe when you leave the house just because of your gender? Do people openly mock you for your height as an adult? Do they yell about how youre the perfect height to suck their dick? Because those are the things that happen to short women.


Shorter men can be rendered invisible in the presence of taller men. Women render shorter men invisible in the presence of taller men. Women can subconsciously socially castrate shorter men while in the pursuit of taller men. Is it worse to be openly mocked in words, better to be mocked by actions?

Nobody's blues are the same, but they're still the blues. That's all.
 
2013-01-19 10:47:04 AM  

SnarfVader: gilgigamesh: Smock Pot: SnarfVader: WhippingBoy: Smock Pot: I don't know why women keep trying to tell men what it's like, because men are never going to get it. Ever. No matter what a woman says about this, no matter how many analogies she makes, no matter how she says it, men will respond with... pretty much everything in this thread. They will continue to act like untrained dogs around women they want to fark and shiat all over women they deem too old or too ugly to fark.

Yep, this is true.

No, it's bullshiat. Not all men are like that, especially not the ones like me who have daughters they want to see succeed. Quit lumping us all together.

If you aren't like the men described in the article, great. Be an example and stand up for women when you see this shiat.

Just understand that as a man, you're still never gonna get it.

I *never* see men act like this, which is why I think the article is bullshiat.

Maybe that's the real issue. I wonder if cat calls are a rural vs urban thing. I just can't imagine myself or anybody I know doing this or groping women on the subway. I guess I really can't relate.


It may be regional.  I live in the South.  There's a certain gentility factor: women who work in my office have the door held open for them, men wait for them to exit the elevator before exiting themselves, that sort of thing.  There is a sexism at work there, but only the passive kind only your most angry feminists get worked up about.

I can only imagine that some lout who groped a woman exiting an elevator would probably find himself leaving the elevator with a few broken fingers.
 
2013-01-19 10:47:27 AM  
Holy shiatcakes, it's rare to see 200+ comments of so many people JUST NOT GETTING IT.

Your intrusion into my life is not welcome. Keep it to yourself!
 
2013-01-19 10:47:32 AM  
Well to fix this you need women to change how dating works. Guys only do this because they are the one with the onus to approach women, if women would come up and ask out guys, this would turn everything around.
 
2013-01-19 10:47:45 AM  

someonelse: halfof33: Wow, are really greenlighting crappy feminist blogs now??

Your blog sucks.

As opposed to, say, jammiewearingfool or the unskewed polls guy or any number of other crap blogs that FARK links to all the time? You're shocked, shocked!


As long as we are on the same page that this blog sucks, I'm down with your post, fembro.

She proved that the plural of anecdote is "anec-data!"
 
2013-01-19 10:48:15 AM  
Does it disturb you that we think like this? That we have to think like this?

I do find it disturbing that the author thinks like that. She does not have to. She talks about the things she does to protect herself because she's sure she's hurtling towards her rape moment, then notes that when her rape moment came she didn't get raped.
If rape didn't exist, would she (or anyone at all, male or female) no longer need to concern themselves with assault? Would she stop being afraid of men if they were only capable of beating the crap out of her but not raping her?
As long as she carries the mindset that every man is Schrodinger's rapist (yes, I've read that ridiculous essay, too) then the only acceptable behavior from any man is to pretend they don't see her.
I don't suggest that she, or any woman, should have to put up with unwanted advances or aggressive behavior, or worse, from men. I just don't subscribe to the idea that being convinced she's eventually going to be raped makes all men guilty of causing her to feel that way.
 
2013-01-19 10:48:29 AM  

ExperianScaresCthulhu: Nobody's blues are the same, but they're still the blues. That's all.


Thank you. This is all I've been trying to say.
 
2013-01-19 10:49:57 AM  
But I ain't complaining I have always had good looking girlfriends, have a hot wife, and banged a lot of tall guys old ladies.

Oh no, it looks like you omitted a punctuation mark.
It should be "banged a lot of tall guys, old ladies." or "banged a lot of tall guys and old ladies."
 
2013-01-19 10:50:05 AM  
Poor Emmet Till. He never did anything to deserve being dragged into such a tiresome conversation.
 
2013-01-19 10:50:19 AM  
That wasn't an article. That was one big long question.
54 question marks on the whole page.
 
2013-01-19 10:50:45 AM  

Easy Reader: Also published as "A Morning's Stroll In Italy".


Oh so THIS

Backpacked around europe a few times, and had several "Italy girlfriends" - girl backpackers who'd pair up with guys to travel with, because what TFA describes is nothing. That guy "pelvic thrusting" in Chicago? He'd have been rubbing up against you and grabbing a tit in Rome.
 
2013-01-19 10:51:49 AM  

Mister Peejay: cabbyman: [slowfacts.files.wordpress.com image 600x367]

Holy crap, that's a beautiful revolver. It's like anti-steampunk.

Want.

/sadly, it's probably heinously expensive


It kind of looks like a Chiappa Rhino (ChiappaFirearms.com), with the barrel line up with the bottom chamber...but no top strap over the cylinder? :-o Funky-looking. Anyway, Rhinos aren't cheap, but they can be found sub-$1,000.
 
2013-01-19 10:52:15 AM  

quickdraw: Why wouldnt he tell me if he had been harassed before I met him?


Sexual Assault/harassment for males is generally harder to report and more Than likely under reported. Men may feel less than a man if they report it or feel it'll be ignored by society since "it doesn't happen to men'. Studies show that men are, however, likely to report it to an unknown individual (say a hotline resource) than a loved one for they would fear being judged
 
2013-01-19 10:52:53 AM  
Asking

lackadaisicalfreakshow: Holy shiatcakes, it's rare to see 200+ comments of so many people JUST NOT GETTING IT.

Your intrusion into my life is not welcome. Keep it to yourself!


You seem perplexed that a large population of emotionally stunted male Farkers would struggle with empathy for this lady blogger.
 
2013-01-19 10:53:13 AM  
The an article written by a provocateur feminist, a staple article full of truths from both side to get debating juices flow.

Just curious, has she ever picked up a tab on a first date with a guy?

/Sexist cultural assumptions, you starting pulling the thread on them and pretty soon you have four fingers pointing back at you.
 
2013-01-19 10:54:05 AM  

someonelse: THE GREAT NAME: FEMALE LIFE PLAN:
0-15 force men to give you attention by getting in their faces
15-30 complain about too much attention from men
30-100 force men to give you attention by getting in their faces

^^^^
This, by the way, is what actual misogyny looks like.


Two replies! Are you under-age or over the hill?
 
2013-01-19 10:54:33 AM  
m.wsj.net

Problem solved?
 
2013-01-19 10:54:42 AM  

WhippingBoy: quickdraw: WhippingBoy: I'm defending "men" in general.

Why?

Why? I dunno... because there just might be some men out there who are decent human beings?


Was there one named in the article?
 
2013-01-19 10:54:51 AM  
All property is theft, all sex is rape, all commerce is oppression. And other overwrought and painstakingly delineated college theses that stack up to f*ck all in the real world. Did we really come up with brave and empowering new world when we decided that being ladies and gentlemen was "old hat". That old hat was a pretty useful ledge in our climb out of the social primordial goo, y'all. And so far, we haven't exactly been farting rainbows on each other by declaring it irrelevant.
 
2013-01-19 10:55:11 AM  

WhippingBoy: Here's a fun game: Replace the word "men" in feminist articles with the word "blacks" and see how the article reads.


Here's another fun game:  Try to spot the false equivalency fallacy in WhippingBoy's posts.  Oh...game over.  I win!
 
2013-01-19 10:55:36 AM  

ExperianScaresCthulhu: quickdraw: ExperianScaresCthulhu: quickdraw: ExperianScaresCthulhu: Men are graded on their height. Women can control all of the above. Men can not control their height.

So your point is that you are judged on one physical attribute and women are judged on dozens of them - some of which they can control? And your using that to show how mens lives are just the same as womens?

Women can control those 'dozens of things'. Men cannot. Bottom line. Women have it easier than men when it comes to using the softer skills to get what they want. Also bottom line.

Shorter men are screwed in ways the 'nice guys' look at, shake their heads and sigh saying 'there but for the grace of God..' You're right that no, men's lives and women's lives are not the same. But it's not like men don't face their own kinds of harassments, rejections, and attempts by others to overpower them on the daily. Shorter men are going to experience it more than taller men. And, unlike women, they have no social outlets and no social sympathy for fighting against it. Shrug.

I get it yes - it sucks to be a short guy. What does that have to do with never feeling safe when you leave the house just because of your gender? Do people openly mock you for your height as an adult? Do they yell about how youre the perfect height to suck their dick? Because those are the things that happen to short women.

Shorter men can be rendered invisible in the presence of taller men. Women render shorter men invisible in the presence of taller men. Women can subconsciously socially castrate shorter men while in the pursuit of taller men. Is it worse to be openly mocked in words, better to be mocked by actions?

Nobody's blues are the same, but they're still the blues. That's all.


So you go into every thread about a serious issue of widespread social injustice to complain about how it sucks to be you because youre a short white guy with a job? Your life sucks because you are ridiculously self-obsessed - not because you are short.
 
2013-01-19 10:56:23 AM  

DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: Frederick: So being really attractive is a two sided coin, eh?  Who woulda thought.

Of course on the other side of the coin is; greater salaries,  undeserved promotions, more lenient sentences, ugh, lets stop the list there.....

I wonder why your article didnt mention how your husband deals with your attractiveness?

Fark you. Attractive women are not the only women who deal with farkupitude from guys. I got the same crap this woman got, either of the same type, or worse, the same experience not tempered by a pretty face. If you're female, you're fair game, out there in the world of assholes.

And her husband? Really?

Go EABOD.


I expect to hear from some pretty defensive guys, but I wasn't expecting it right from the beginning.

/Now let's see if I managed to avoid filter pwnage.
 
2013-01-19 10:56:37 AM  

quickdraw: ExperianScaresCthulhu: quickdraw: WhippingBoy: quickdraw: WhippingBoy: I'm defending "men" in general.

Why?

Why? I dunno... because there just might be some men out there who are decent human beings?

Nowhere in that article does it imply there are no good men. FFS just because a women says lots of men act like assholes doesnt mean all men do. If I said the Olive Garden sucks would you feel the need to defend all Italian restaurants?

Blacks have to. Why not generic racial-not-specific men?

Blacks have to what? Eat at Olive Garden? Really not sure what youre getting at here...


"just because a non-black says lots of blacks act like assholes doesn't mean all blacks do. if I said blacks suck would you feel the need to defend all blacks?" -- that's where I was going with it. and the reason why i did so is because i'd rather blacks stood up against it, than turned turtle and pretended 'well what someone says about all blacks doesn't pertain to me because i'm an individual' when seeing shiat like that in a public setting. it doens't come across as being an individual, it comes across as agreement, like 'see, even other blacks think blacks are assholes'.

in this case, if men don't stand up for themselves when there is the appearance of painting all men with the 'rapist' brush, then it doesn't come across as dudes being individuals, it comes across as agreement. I'm still probably not saying this right. I apologize. Working two projects this morning without breakfast. i need a BLT but don't want to head to the store.
 
2013-01-19 10:56:56 AM  

medieval: I would like to ask all the mouth-breathers who got from this article "I'm so pretty guys won't leave me alone" whether they're admitting to not reading the article, or whether they're admitting to being functionally illiterate. It has to be one of those two things.


Not really. It could be both. Not that there's anything wrong with either. Not everybody's literate, and it's not illegal to comment in a thread without having read the article.
 
2013-01-19 10:56:56 AM  

Frederick: Hmmm. I read the article as I'm-so-pretty-guys-wont-leave-me-alone and apparently you read the article as all-men-are-rapists-in-waiting.


Those two are not mutually exclusive.
 
2013-01-19 10:57:06 AM  
Serious question: if "men" suddenly stopped giving the writer of the article attention, would she be more happy or less happy? Be honest.

I'm speaking strictly about the writer of the article, not women in general.
 
2013-01-19 10:57:43 AM  
My opinion as a formerly not-bad looking chick with a great rack is that this lady needs to lighten the hell up. I went from wolf whistles and catcalls to people i don't know driving by and making fun of me for being fat. I'd much rather the wolf whistles and nice rack comments. At least those made me feel good about my body.

Also needs to stop being so damned paranoid. I used to live in Edmonton, AB, and walked home from work at night without all these paranoid delusions about people waiting in the shadows to rape me. I was more worried about the whores who would try to attack me if i didn't give them a cigarette
 
2013-01-19 10:57:47 AM  

quickdraw: ElectricPeterTork: And if he did, how many months of "ZOMG YOU'RE CHEATING ON ME WITH A PRETTIER WOMAN" insecurity drama would he have to endure for mentioning someone made unwanted remarks to him?

lol - none. We're adults.


Naive.

Your brains aren't tethered together via ethernet.

Yet.

/workin' on it.
 
2013-01-19 10:58:10 AM  
farm7.staticflickr.com
 
2013-01-19 10:58:18 AM  

Aar1012: quickdraw: Why wouldnt he tell me if he had been harassed before I met him?

Sexual Assault/harassment for males is generally harder to report and more Than likely under reported. Men may feel less than a man if they report it or feel it'll be ignored by society since "it doesn't happen to men'. Studies show that men are, however, likely to report it to an unknown individual (say a hotline resource) than a loved one for they would fear being judged


I can assure we have discussed much much more potentially shame inducing incidents in both our lives. After being in love for 13 years you tend to get around to talking about everything.
 
2013-01-19 10:58:46 AM  
Man.......after putting up with that redhead screaming and biatching for two hours in Zero Dark Thirty last night, reading that crappy blog, and quickdraw's screeds, I'm going to  down a couple of mimosas and go back to bed. Wake me up for the Flyers game though.
 
2013-01-19 10:58:53 AM  
I don't know a single man who acts like that. While I'm not saying that those assholes don't exist, as far I can tell it's a low percentage of the population, and us regular guys don't respect them.
 
2013-01-19 10:59:02 AM  

Howie Spankowitz: WhippingBoy: Here's a fun game: Replace the word "men" in feminist articles with the word "blacks" and see how the article reads.

Here's another fun game:  Try to spot the false equivalency fallacy in WhippingBoy's posts.  Oh...game over.  I win!


I'm not trying to suggest the two are equal. It's merely intended as a thought exercise.
 
2013-01-19 11:00:08 AM  
Instead of writing a blog, why doesn't she turn to the rude people and say, "You're rude and never going to meet anyone worthwhile that way."
 
2013-01-19 11:00:45 AM  

Zarquon's Flat Tire: I don't know a single man who acts like that. While I'm not saying that those assholes don't exist, as far I can tell it's a low percentage of the population, and us regular guys don't respect them.


Ssshhh, you'll give away the secrets of the patriarchy.
 
2013-01-19 11:01:15 AM  

gilgigamesh: "Sexual harrassment is the wrong man noticing your tits."

Or specifically, as the author described, "middle aged".

Its funny, she lacks the perspective to realize that she falls right into the same role of objectification she seems to think all men are guilty of.



I'm middle-aged but I'm aware that chasing a woman below a certain age isn't just unrealistic, it's icky.

I don't have a problem accepting tfa's author's view that this behavior's frightening and insulting to her and other women as well. I can only imagine that for women who aren't as easily frightened and insulted, this behavior still gets tiresome from time to time. But no matter who she is, the old dude/younger woman thing only adds a big layer of creepy.


Parmenius: I really dislike having to prove that those jackasses don't represent my gender, and threads like this do not help.



This.
 
2013-01-19 11:01:38 AM  

ExperianScaresCthulhu: TiiiMMMaHHH: someonelse: TiiiMMMaHHH: someonelse: letrole: Sexual harrassment is the wrong man noticing your tits.

You can't troll a thread where the most blatantly ignorant opinions are already being expressed in earnest, dude. You can't make a sh*thouse smell worse.

I'm in a commited relationship with a woman 8 years older than me. He's not trolling, it's true. She's old enough that she fears not being attractive on a regular basis. She's real enough that she'll flat out admit that she doesn't want gross dudes oggling her. If an attractive man checks her out or compliments her, it makes her feel great because it means (on a genetic level at least) that she's viable. Basic programming at it's finest.

His/her name is The Troll, and he is always and forever trolling. You know this, or ought to.

Nothing in your second paragraph is particularly relevant. Your girlfriend likes being complimented, therefore what? What basic logic are you using?

That an HONEST woman will tell you: When ugly guys hit on me, I wince. When cute guys hit on me, I think for a second "I'd hit it. He has good genes". WOMEN LIE ABOUT THIS FACTOR ALL THE TIME.

Difference usually being; a mature woman values her partner more than her orgasms.

And the other side of that difference being, the mature man values his orgasms more than his partner? Is that where all the 'I love my wife but she won't fk me anymore so I'll get some on the side and it'll be cool because I gotta nut but that doesn't mean I don't love my wife when I nut in some other broad' stuff comes from?


I would say that that is spot on, yes. I differ to my original post/argument though. Broken families create broken individuals. And that was BEFORE social media platforms made it vogue to be perpetually adolescent. Whores and masogynistic D-Bags are great consumers of the corporate-industrial complex. And the beat goes on...
 
2013-01-19 11:01:55 AM  

ExperianScaresCthulhu: quickdraw: ExperianScaresCthulhu: quickdraw: WhippingBoy: quickdraw: WhippingBoy: I'm defending "men" in general.

Why?

Why? I dunno... because there just might be some men out there who are decent human beings?

Nowhere in that article does it imply there are no good men. FFS just because a women says lots of men act like assholes doesnt mean all men do. If I said the Olive Garden sucks would you feel the need to defend all Italian restaurants?

Blacks have to. Why not generic racial-not-specific men?

Blacks have to what? Eat at Olive Garden? Really not sure what youre getting at here...

"just because a non-black says lots of blacks act like assholes doesn't mean all blacks do. if I said blacks suck would you feel the need to defend all blacks?" -- that's where I was going with it. and the reason why i did so is because i'd rather blacks stood up against it, than turned turtle and pretended 'well what someone says about all blacks doesn't pertain to me because i'm an individual' when seeing shiat like that in a public setting. it doens't come across as being an individual, it comes across as agreement, like 'see, even other blacks think blacks are assholes'.

in this case, if men don't stand up for themselves when there is the appearance of painting all men with the 'rapist' brush, then it doesn't come across as dudes being individuals, it comes across as agreement. I'm still probably not saying this right. I apologize. Working two projects this morning without breakfast. i need a BLT but don't want to head to the store.


Where in the article does it say "All men are rapists?" I'll tell you. No where. The article describes her experiences of being harrassed.  Its not like shes advocating castration. You can put your lance down. The male population doesnt need your white-knighting.
 
2013-01-19 11:01:58 AM  

Lenny_da_Hog: Instead of writing a blog, why doesn't she turn to the rude people and say, "You're rude and never going to meet anyone worthwhile that way."


because they are drunk, high or teenagers?
 
2013-01-19 11:02:14 AM  
I clearly remember the first time I saw people acting like what she describes in the article. I was absolutely flabbergasted that it was real. But then I grew up in a small town and was pretty sheltered.

When I went to a bigger city as an undergrad and worked at a grocery store it was insane, out of control, and no one appeared to care. It was bad enough it made me uncomfortable, and I wasn't even the object of the behavior. But it made me hyper-aware of it, made me see it everywhere.

Now where I see it, it seems to cut across lines of education and social stratum. At the company where I work, it doesn't happen, at least not as I understand it from some of my teammates. It's still plainly visible at the grocery store a few blocks away.

It is sad that we have got to the point where we are willing to just accept this as normal and belittle anyone who complains about it.
 
2013-01-19 11:03:04 AM  

Red Shirt Blues: Man.......after putting up with that redhead screaming and biatching for two hours in Zero Dark Thirty last night, reading that crappy blog, and quickdraw's screeds, I'm going to  down a couple of mimosas and go back to bed. Wake me up for the Flyers game though.


Isnt it nice when simple logic can show you what a ludicrous position you are defending? You're welcome.
 
2013-01-19 11:03:24 AM  

Howie Spankowitz: WhippingBoy: Here's a fun game: Replace the word "men" in feminist articles with the word "blacks" and see how the article reads.

Here's another fun game:  Try to spot the false equivalency fallacy in WhippingBoy's posts.  Oh...game over.  I win!


Howie: why is it false?
 
2013-01-19 11:03:25 AM  

lolpix: Poor Emmet Till. He never did anything to deserve being dragged into such a tiresome conversation.


The lady made comments about brown men and her being a white woman, in a blog about unwanted sexual attention.

Emmit got killed cuz some white biatch let her community punish a child for (allegedly) daring to consider her sexually.

The pedestal is that some women are above other men's league, how dare those men (allegedly) consider her sexually, how intriguing, how complimentary if only they were in the woman's league, but they are not therefore it's unwanted and insulting.

You know what I mean? (BLT where are you? fk this.. ugh)
 
2013-01-19 11:03:50 AM  
Where the fark does this lady live that that's 'normal' for her? I have never, in my life, seen that shiat. Not at bus stops or clubs, not once.

And the 'omg stranger who doesn't speak my language grabbed my arm! He was calling me a whore!' uh, lady, he could have just thought you were pretty and wanted to get your attention.

I've only skimmed here, because, uh, wow, lots of male butthurt and female butthurt all conflicting and screaming insults at each other and not much else, but I have a question: in American society, the male has to be the pursuer.

Women operate on a much higher frequency, language wise; they run 5-10 conversations at once, and men run one, maybe two (verbal and limited body). Women also typically have a pick of who or whatever they want, and men have to be aggressive to even get the attention of a woman most times. Isn't this simply an extension of how society as a whole functions? Sure, in a relationship, women have much more to lose (pregnancy, child, health risks, etc.), but again, society forces a man to chase a woman. If he's a 'perfect gentleman' like in the books, would he even get the attention of a woman now? Or would she assume he's uninterested and/or gay?

And, again, where the fark does this woman live? I have never seen people act like that, on college campuses, in NOLA, in Houston, or Dallas, or any sort of 'party in the desert'.
 
2013-01-19 11:04:09 AM  
Men are what they are and all of these guys are that AND stupid clowns.

The sooner women realize that all men share some traits and some men take it too far, you're going to be very unhappy.

In other news no one ever blames mothers for raising them like that in the first place.

I know better because that's how I was raised. My Mom didn't tolerate any kind of that talk. not that I did, she would kill me and I knew that.

We're typically picky about bodies and women are typically picky about how much money men make. We all know no woman would ever vocally would return up her nose to a guy with the wrong clothes or shoes or car.

Scumbags are scumbags.
 
2013-01-19 11:04:26 AM  

quickdraw: Where in the article does it say "All men are rapists?" I'll tell you. No where. The article describes her experiences of being harrassed.  Its not like shes advocating castration. You can put your lance down. The male population doesnt need your white-knighting.


Oh ffs, are you seriously saying that the "all men are potential rapists" undertone is absent from the article?
 
2013-01-19 11:04:34 AM  
Meh, try and live as a man for some time. You'll find out that a lot of men make similar comments and crude jokes to each other. It is not always because men are sexist that they do this, it is often because they have an in-group in which that sort of behaviour towards each other is normal and they simply extend that behaviour to others.

When men do it to other men they get to hear that they should just suck it up. If they do it to a woman they get complaints about sexism. Just remember this womenfolk: you do not want to be treated the way men treat each other. That would be how you get treated now and then some.
 
2013-01-19 11:04:47 AM  

Lenny_da_Hog: Instead of writing a blog, why doesn't she turn to the rude people and say, "You're rude and never going to meet anyone worthwhile that way."


Because it is dangerous to do so.
 
2013-01-19 11:06:09 AM  

WhippingBoy: quickdraw: Where in the article does it say "All men are rapists?" I'll tell you. No where. The article describes her experiences of being harrassed.  Its not like shes advocating castration. You can put your lance down. The male population doesnt need your white-knighting.

Oh ffs, are you seriously saying that the "all men are potential rapists" undertone is absent from the article?


Yes I am. And that you are reading that into it says much more about you than it does about her.
 
2013-01-19 11:06:27 AM  

quickdraw: Aar1012: quickdraw: Why wouldnt he tell me if he had been harassed before I met him?

Sexual Assault/harassment for males is generally harder to report and more Than likely under reported. Men may feel less than a man if they report it or feel it'll be ignored by society since "it doesn't happen to men'. Studies show that men are, however, likely to report it to an unknown individual (say a hotline resource) than a loved one for they would fear being judged

I can assure we have discussed much much more potentially shame inducing incidents in both our lives. After being in love for 13 years you tend to get around to talking about everything.


I'm just pointing out why you shouldn't be surprised if he hasn't told you. Sexual assault/harassment, as a whole, is terrible. It annoys me, however, when I have had discussions of reported male sexual assaults with people that work to prevent sexual assault and they just dismiss it.

Is it worse for women? Yes.

Does that mean it doesn't happen to men? No
 
2013-01-19 11:06:43 AM  

quickdraw: KiwDaWabbit: I just wonder, who is the target audience for this article?

I'm pretty sure it's not men who creep on women.

Yes. She says that in the article. So she is most likely trying to reach those people who dont think they condone this behavior but who enable it by pretending it doesnt exist.


You mean like people who enable woman-on-mad domestic violence by pretending it doesn't exist? Or discrimination against boys in state schools? Or women who sue for childcare when they're clearly better off then the husband? Or female child abusers? Or women who make false rape claims?
 
2013-01-19 11:07:27 AM  

DerAppie: Meh, try and live as a man for some time. You'll find out that a lot of men make similar comments and crude jokes to each other. It is not always because men are sexist that they do this, it is often because they have an in-group in which that sort of behaviour towards each other is normal and they simply extend that behaviour to others.

When men do it to other men they get to hear that they should just suck it up. If they do it to a woman they get complaints about sexism. Just remember this womenfolk: you do not want to be treated the way men treat each other. That would be how you get treated now and then some.


So your position is that women are discriminated against because of their gender?
 
2013-01-19 11:08:59 AM  
Well, if you haven't found it, I guess it's not in the kitchen.
 
2013-01-19 11:09:16 AM  

quickdraw: Your life sucks because you are ridiculously self-obsessed


Pot meet kettle.
 
2013-01-19 11:09:21 AM  

THE GREAT NAME: quickdraw: KiwDaWabbit: I just wonder, who is the target audience for this article?

I'm pretty sure it's not men who creep on women.

Yes. She says that in the article. So she is most likely trying to reach those people who dont think they condone this behavior but who enable it by pretending it doesnt exist.

You mean like people who enable woman-on-mad domestic violence by pretending it doesn't exist? Or discrimination against boys in state schools? Or women who sue for childcare when they're clearly better off then the husband? Or female child abusers? Or women who make false rape claims?


Yep. Just like that. And we have had Fark threads about all those topics. This thread is about sexual harassment against women in an urban setting.
 
2013-01-19 11:10:51 AM  
I never in my life have given unwanted attention to a woman wether she was attractive or not. If I see men do it in my prescence I call them out as the bullies that they are because I am big enough to stand up to them, hate bullies in all forms and in fact take pleasure in publicly humiliating them, and find this bad behaviour by some men makes it much harder for a nice, well mannered person like myself to approach women either irl or on a dating site.

That being said, this article is pretty much full of misandry and was written solely for feminist man-haters like the disgusting examples we have heard barking in this thread. Ladies, you are making things worse for yourselves by saying stupid things like "you're a man and therefore you cannot understand". You really can't tell another human being they are incapable of insight or empathy due to gender, you are the one incapable of empathy at this point but maybe if you question yourself on occasion instead of narcissitically knowing you are always right you may become wiser.

Short guy explaining how you don't have short man syndrome and then bragging about how many tall guys' wives you've slept with... you have short man syndrome. I'm sorry you feel the way you do but the problem isn't related to size, it's related to perception. You are no less a man than me because you are shorter than me but if other people try and make you feel thusly they are bullies and you should give them a good hard knee in the groin.
 
2013-01-19 11:10:52 AM  

Red Shirt Blues: quickdraw: Your life sucks because you are ridiculously self-obsessed

Pot meet kettle.


So wait are you saying you are self-obsessed? Because I didnt get that from you - a little dense maybe.
 
2013-01-19 11:11:15 AM  

quickdraw:
So you go into every thread about a serious issue of widespread social injustice to complain about how it sucks to be you because youre a short white guy with a job? Your life sucks because you are ridiculously self-obsesse ...


I notice from your profile that you are a liberal. As such, you think all white males have it easy, and everybody else in the world is some sort of brave hero fighting insurmountable odds. Liberals really see the world in such ridiculous terms.
 
2013-01-19 11:11:23 AM  
In one of the authors other pieces, she admits to being a fatty...
http://www.rolereboot.org/life/details/2012-08-can-i-have-fat-pride-w i thout-throwing-thin-women-und

Hate to break it to you and your "curves," but I'm pretty sure the cat-calls were for the girl walking with you...
 
2013-01-19 11:13:15 AM  

THE GREAT NAME: I notice from your profile that you are a liberal. As such, you think


Thanks for telling all of us what we think, Republican.
 
2013-01-19 11:13:25 AM  

quickdraw: So your position is that women are discriminated against because of their gender?


Yes.
 
2013-01-19 11:13:37 AM  

quickdraw: Lenny_da_Hog: Instead of writing a blog, why doesn't she turn to the rude people and say, "You're rude and never going to meet anyone worthwhile that way."

Because it is dangerous to do so.


Uh-huh. Every guy in the world is just waiting to beat the shiat out of women. I guess women are just that weak. No wonder they seek out violent, beefy men.
 
2013-01-19 11:14:37 AM  

quickdraw: medius: and the day comes when they stop looking

No it doesn't. A woman is always prey regardless of her age. You watched too many bad TV shows. My 92 year old grandma got hit on by her neighbor last year. He was creepy about it too.


i guess this is a case of

point What does it feel like to be a hot girl who gets old?

counterpoint
cdn.shopify.com
 
2013-01-19 11:14:38 AM  
This thread is telling from the responses.

Most of you making negative comments about the writer have no problem posting a response in a thread to someone who is being an asswipe in print. So for the benefit of society, do it in real life.

I'm not a feminist, I just think people should treat each other with respect until the time when someone does something to lose that respect.

Two women walking down the sidewalk should be able to walk and converse without some idiot chasing them asking for their "taco". Next time you see something like this, call the dude out on it, make him realize he is being an asshole.

I've done this usually when it my friends who are being the asshole but I've done it to strangers as well.

Put yourself in your wife, or sister or daughter's position as some 220 lb man is following them down the street asking for their taco. Lets try to curb this behavior and call an asshole an asshole so that maybe next time he won't do it.
 
2013-01-19 11:15:01 AM  
Ever notice that the worst thing you can call a man is a woman, and the worst thing you can cal a woman is "just like your mother"? Our culture has no specific coming of age rituals wherein you get to hang up your pimple cream and you get the privileges and responsibilities of not being able to get away with being a jagoff. Shame, that. It's still this wildly romantic and often ridiculous notion that we can just toss a line out there and the universe will bend our way. Bit f*cking silly, innit? There's a lot of jerks. Not all of them have testicle. The problem isn't gender or hormones. We know how those work. The problem is a broken culture where were taught that "getting away with something" is an achievement.
 
2013-01-19 11:15:06 AM  

THE GREAT NAME: quickdraw:
So you go into every thread about a serious issue of widespread social injustice to complain about how it sucks to be you because youre a short white guy with a job? Your life sucks because you are ridiculously self-obsesse ...

I notice from your profile that you are a liberal. As such, you think all white males have it easy, and everybody else in the world is some sort of brave hero fighting insurmountable odds. Liberals really see the world in such ridiculous terms.


Aw what a cute little troll.

Heres a cookie now run along and play scamp.

kookykitsch.com
 
2013-01-19 11:15:09 AM  
I'm not going to the guys in the article. I will ask: when did it become ok for girls to wear just tights to work instead of pants? Jesus Christ it's incredibly distracting. These things leave nothing to the imagination.

/I guess it's my fault for looking
//though I have no idea how I can physically stop myself from looking
 
2013-01-19 11:15:26 AM  

someonelse: LouDobbsAwaaaay: someonelse: THE GREAT NAME: FEMALE LIFE PLAN:
0-15 force men to give you attention by getting in their faces
15-30 complain about too much attention from men
30-100 force men to give you attention by getting in their faces

^^^^
This, by the way, is what actual misogyny looks like.

Well apparently you haven't had to push your way through a group of 100 year old women on the street, getting in your face for attention. It's degrading and humiliating, and it doesn't smell all that great.

True, but I've never been to Florida. I've heard tell of their notorious old lady gangs down there. Downright threatening, I'm told.


They occupy the left lane and the alert each other by using their turn signal. They will run you off the road.

Dementia!
 
2013-01-19 11:16:06 AM  

quickdraw: So you go into every thread about a serious issue of widespread social injustice to complain about how it sucks to be you because youre a short white guy with a job? Your life sucks because you are ridiculously self-obsessed - not because you are short.


I'm still learning to embrace my Bitterness (tm). I still get my ass kicked about not being humble about being A Hater and Proud. There are issues with sexual harassment which do need to be dealt with. Flipping the switch (script, whatever) doesnt work, though, because men and women think differently, interact towards one another differently, interact within the group differently.

Men are being honest when they don't see the big deal as it pertains to themselves. They only see the big deal when it pertains to their posessions (the women in their lives), so you get all kind of dudes who don't do the worst stuff not because they don't want it and wouldn't want it to happen to them, but because they don't want it to happen to the women in their lives. They mean well.

If women want to really flip it, they have to aim for the shiat that affects men as men, the shiat that personally offends men, the shiat that society pushes to make men feel lesser, weaker, less in control, less sure about themselves. So, what are those things?

Height's an easy one, because it's continually overlooked (just like men's issues can be overlooked). Again, unlike all the very superficial shiat named for women, height is something a man cannot control. He doesn't have to face catcalls from construction crews; his obstacle course is different, but it can still grind down on the soul.

Those who fail become Napoleonic (just like women who fail become Bitter) as a defense mechanism. You know what I mean?
 
2013-01-19 11:16:52 AM  

DrPainMD: The author, and most of the commenters, needs to grow a pair.


And you need to grow up.
 
2013-01-19 11:17:43 AM  

quickdraw: Alright lets say hes terrified to tell me if some guy groped his ass at a trade show or something. Why wouldnt he tell me if he had been harassed before I met him?


Interesting how you assume that the harassment would be from a man.
 
2013-01-19 11:17:44 AM  
Link

[A critical component of a victim's perception of harassment is the undesirability of the sexual advance.

In their 1994 study, Sheets and Braver gave more than 200 college students--80 percent had part-time jobs, and about 30 percent reported encountering sexual harassment in the workplace--a vignette describing a workplace interaction between male and female coworkers in a law firm. The man was described as either a lawyer, research assistant, or courier, and as married or single. Photos of the men, prerated for attractiveness, were included with the story.

The women were asked to rate the degree to which they felt sexually harassed.

Attractive, single men were least likely to be accused of sexual harassment. Although the team expected that people with higher status would be more desirable as a potential date or mate--and so less likely to be seen as harassing--social status didn't seem to affect the subjects' perceptions of harassment.

The victim's marital status may play a role, according to Braver. "If you're married, advances are seen as more harassing. And people involved in a committed relationship are even more likely than married people to find advances harassing. At this point, I can only speculate that's because they're in less committed, and less secure, relationships."]


Let's try and not confuse the interactions of people who are just bad at the "mating game" with real sexual predators and rape. Crying wolf only makes it worse for real victims of assault, and not just people who can't handle the jerks and biatches in life.

In the case of a woman on the street, part of what makes the guy unattractive is that he's a stranger who is yelling at her on the street. It may also be how he's dressed, what she's been taught to "look out for", or something similar.

He is acting like inappropriate asshole, and she is potentially putting too much stock in her own perceived "right" to walk through life as both attractive and unapproached by anyone she hasn't pre-approved.

As has been mentioned, men have this problem at times but usually blow it off. We have our own set of obstacles in life, and some do biatch about them more than others, just like some women do.
 
2013-01-19 11:19:58 AM  

WhippingBoy: quickdraw: Where in the article does it say "All men are rapists?" I'll tell you. No where. The article describes her experiences of being harrassed.  Its not like shes advocating castration. You can put your lance down. The male population doesnt need your white-knighting.

Oh ffs, are you seriously saying that the "all men are potential rapists" undertone is absent from the article?


quickdraw is a socialist. She sees what she wants to see.
 
2013-01-19 11:20:13 AM  

Lenny_da_Hog: Instead of writing a blog, why doesn't she turn to the rude people and say, "You're rude and never going to meet anyone worthwhile that way."


You haven't been paying attention.

Face to face confrontation is not socially acceptable these days. All confrontation must occur with a computing device in between the opposing parties.

It's a law or something.
 
2013-01-19 11:20:33 AM  
Y'all are talking about the what.. but not the why. So many commenters, thinking they have insight or answers. You cannot run around putting out fires when you haven't figured out how to control the flame. It's truly the definition of futility.

Maybe I'm being WAY TOO serious for fark (of course i am), but speaking as a neglected child from a joke of a household, I came VERY close to becoming 'that guy'.

As I was caring for our flock of chickens in between posting to this oh-so-philisophical thread, it dawned on me as I watched one of our little polish caps, who gets picked on all the time, start pecking the shiat out of one of the younger, newer chickens:

THE PECKED BECOME THE PECKERS


/if you are a cynic like me, get some chickens. They really put it all in an intellectual perspective.
//PSA
 
2013-01-19 11:20:36 AM  

Red Shirt Blues: Man.......after putting up with that redhead screaming and biatching for two hours in Zero Dark Thirty last night, reading that crappy blog, and quickdraw's screeds, I'm going to  down a couple of mimosas and go back to bed. Wake me up for the Flyers game though.


You're a Philly fan? I thought Philly Fan was the king (and queen) of not giving a fk, dishing out the abuse and taking it, too (reads your profile) ah, Florida, nevermind. You got four hours before the game, man, it's too nice outside to sleep, if you ain't got work to do. Enjoy that sun.
 
2013-01-19 11:20:57 AM  

ExperianScaresCthulhu:
I see what you're saying, and agree with it. Again, leads back to the ho doth protest too much. She's not really, she's bragging. See also: hos who make a point of pointing out their BMI when it's on the low end.


I'm guessing you don't have any female friends.
 
2013-01-19 11:21:35 AM  

TiiiMMMaHHH: THE PECKED BECOME THE PECKERS


my ePecker is bigger
 
2013-01-19 11:21:35 AM  

quickdraw: ExperianScaresCthulhu: quickdraw: ExperianScaresCthulhu: quickdraw: WhippingBoy: quickdraw: WhippingBoy: I'm defending "men" in general.

Why?

Why? I dunno... because there just might be some men out there who are decent human beings?

Nowhere in that article does it imply there are no good men. FFS just because a women says lots of men act like assholes doesnt mean all men do. If I said the Olive Garden sucks would you feel the need to defend all Italian restaurants?

Blacks have to. Why not generic racial-not-specific men?

Blacks have to what? Eat at Olive Garden? Really not sure what youre getting at here...

"just because a non-black says lots of blacks act like assholes doesn't mean all blacks do. if I said blacks suck would you feel the need to defend all blacks?" -- that's where I was going with it. and the reason why i did so is because i'd rather blacks stood up against it, than turned turtle and pretended 'well what someone says about all blacks doesn't pertain to me because i'm an individual' when seeing shiat like that in a public setting. it doens't come across as being an individual, it comes across as agreement, like 'see, even other blacks think blacks are assholes'.

in this case, if men don't stand up for themselves when there is the appearance of painting all men with the 'rapist' brush, then it doesn't come across as dudes being individuals, it comes across as agreement. I'm still probably not saying this right. I apologize. Working two projects this morning without breakfast. i need a BLT but don't want to head to the store.

Where in the article does it say "All men are rapists?" I'll tell you. No where. The article describes her experiences of being harrassed.  Its not like shes advocating castration. You can put your lance down. The male population doesnt need your white-knighting.


Aiight. Hat tip to ya, ma'am.
 
2013-01-19 11:21:47 AM  

Lenny_da_Hog: quickdraw: Lenny_da_Hog: Instead of writing a blog, why doesn't she turn to the rude people and say, "You're rude and never going to meet anyone worthwhile that way."

Because it is dangerous to do so.

Uh-huh. Every guy in the world is just waiting to beat the shiat out of women. I guess women are just that weak. No wonder they seek out violent, beefy men.


Seriously? Cant you do better than that? Its like watching somebody box an imaginary opponent.

Ok fine Ill indulge you. This is how it works. Every person we come across has the potential to be friend or foe. When out in a setting where we could be physically vulnerable (no matter who you are) we have to size up people we meet. If a drunk obnoxious idiot is saying rude things to you its generally not wise to call them on it or insult them.

If the person may not be drunk but is larger than you, or is driving a vehicle, or holding something that looks like they might use it as a weapon then you have to think very carefully before you respond to them.

If they are a boss or coworker you have to consider whether it is worth losing your job over.

What is it about the concept of "power deferential" that you dont get?
 
2013-01-19 11:22:53 AM  

bunner: Ever notice that the worst thing you can call a man is a woman, and the worst thing you can cal a woman is "just like your mother"?


Did they change the Fark filter for the C-bomb again ?
 
2013-01-19 11:25:13 AM  

bunner: There's a lot of jerks. Not all of them have testicle.


Indeed. Not all jerks are, in fact, Lance Armstrong.

/sorry
 
2013-01-19 11:25:14 AM  

LouDobbsAwaaaay: THE GREAT NAME: I notice from your profile that you are a liberal. As such, you think

Thanks for telling all of us what we think, Republican.


Nice try. But NAME is not from USA and is an atheist.
 
2013-01-19 11:25:57 AM  

DerAppie: Meh, try and live as a man for some time. You'll find out that a lot of men make similar comments and crude jokes to each other. It is not always because men are sexist that they do this, it is often because they have an in-group in which that sort of behaviour towards each other is normal and they simply extend that behaviour to others.

When men do it to other men they get to hear that they should just suck it up. If they do it to a woman they get complaints about sexism. Just remember this womenfolk: you do not want to be treated the way men treat each other. That would be how you get treated now and then some.

 
2013-01-19 11:26:13 AM  
As long as those same "creeper" guys are the ones more likely to get rewarded with sex, it is going to be harder for "nice guys" to empathize with your problem.

All men are rapists, all women are whores, let's all be robots, the robolution comes!
 
2013-01-19 11:27:07 AM  
non-ironic use of "patriarchy" = whining entitled biatch who has no idea how much progress has been made.

i don't know how many times i've read this exact same article.

you're sad that what you wear effects how people treat you? oh boo farking hoo. that's true for everyone, it's just that young women are coddled and their victimhood complex is respected and encouraged as a way to further demean them.

everytime i hear some bullshiat "switch the pronouns" argument by someone purporting to be in the service of feminism, I have the very real and inescapable feeling that they have no idea what they are talking about when it comes to "equality" among the "genders".

mandatory draft of all fighting age females at the exclusion of males, the inequity and oppression of history must be reversed!! onward patriot! forward soviet!
 
2013-01-19 11:28:03 AM  

THE GREAT NAME: Nice try. But NAME is not from USA and is an atheist.


And talks about himself in the third person, apparently. As much as I'd like it to be otherwise, the Jersey shore is, in actuality, part of the USA.
 
2013-01-19 11:28:24 AM  

gilgigamesh: "Sexual harrassment is the wrong man noticing your tits."

Or specifically, as the author described, "middle aged".

Its funny, she lacks the perspective to realize that she falls right into the same role of objectification she seems to think all men are guilty of.


When the author specified "middle aged," I assumed she was making a point that some of these men are old enough to know better.

I guess our dual interpretations say a lot: the men of Fark read it and think it's all about them. Is it about you, fellas? Do you behave like this? Then WTF are you wetting your pants about?
 
2013-01-19 11:28:52 AM  

LouDobbsAwaaaay: bunner: There's a lot of jerks. Not all of them have testicle.

Indeed. Not all jerks are, in fact, Lance Armstrong.

/sorry


I bet some of them can type, though *sigh*
 
2013-01-19 11:29:13 AM  

quickdraw: Lenny_da_Hog: quickdraw: Lenny_da_Hog: Instead of writing a blog, why doesn't she turn to the rude people and say, "You're rude and never going to meet anyone worthwhile that way."

Because it is dangerous to do so.

Uh-huh. Every guy in the world is just waiting to beat the shiat out of women. I guess women are just that weak. No wonder they seek out violent, beefy men.

Seriously? Cant you do better than that? Its like watching somebody box an imaginary opponent.

Ok fine Ill indulge you. This is how it works. Every person we come across has the potential to be friend or foe. When out in a setting where we could be physically vulnerable (no matter who you are) we have to size up people we meet. If a drunk obnoxious idiot is saying rude things to you its generally not wise to call them on it or insult them.

If the person may not be drunk but is larger than you, or is driving a vehicle, or holding something that looks like they might use it as a weapon then you have to think very carefully before you respond to them.

If they are a boss or coworker you have to consider whether it is worth losing your job over.

What is it about the concept of "power deferential" that you dont get?


Then any reaction she has, including the one she took -- walking down the street -- is just as much of a threat. It's still a rebuke.

I'm 6' tall and 130 pounds. I have no chest. I *will* get my ass kicked in a fight. Yet I've never gotten into one in all of my years, and have still managed to stand up for myself when people say rude things to me. Sometimes it's clear that the goal is violence, so I just walk away -- but not everyone who is rude is going to be violent as well.

That's a cop-out.
 
2013-01-19 11:30:04 AM  
Sounds like she's not tough enough to live in the Big City.

In a smaller city men don't pull that shiat (very often). Maybe frat-bro types. But who hangs out with dude-bros?
 
2013-01-19 11:30:42 AM  

ExperianScaresCthulhu: If women want to really flip it, they have to aim for the shiat that affects men as men, the shiat that personally offends men, the shiat that society pushes to make men feel lesser, weaker, less in control, less sure about themselves. So, what are those things?

Height's an easy one, because it's continually overlooked (just like men's issues can be overlooked). Again, unlike all the very superficial shiat named for women, height is something a man cannot control. He doesn't have to face catcalls from construction crews; his obstacle course is different, but it can still grind down on the soul.

Those who fail become Napoleonic (just like women who fail become Bitter) as a defense mechanism. You know what I mean?


Alright now we are discussing the article. Thank you. Yes there are many ways in which the "flip it" strategy fails. But its just one of many strategies being tried to address a global issue. FWIW shes saying it worked for her to help her get it in her own head when there is gender discrimination at work.

Gender discrimination is something we are raised with - all of us - so its very hard to break.

When I was an undergrad studying architecture my very militant lesbian child development teacher asked me if I was going into architecture because thats what my father does.  I said no. he's an economist. and then asked her if she went into child dev because thats what her father does.

I have used the "flip it" technique on myself (although that was before it had a fancy name and a website) to help me figure out whether I need to modify my own behavior. So its not a perfect tool but its one of several that can be helpful in spotting gender discrimination.
 
2013-01-19 11:31:11 AM  

lordjupiter: The women were asked to rate the degree to which they felt sexually harassed.


And this is where everything breaks down.


Ten Politically Incorrect Truths About Human Nature
Alan S. Miller Ph.D., Satoshi Kanazawa Ph.D.

Men sexually harass women because they are not sexist

An unfortunate consequence of the ever-growing number of women joining the labor force and working side by side with men is the increasing number of sexual harassment cases. Why must sexual harassment be a necessary consequence of the sexual integration of the workplace?

Psychologist Kingsley R. Browne identifies two types of sexual harassment cases: the quid pro quo ("You must sleep with me if you want to keep your job or be promoted") and the "hostile environment" (the workplace is deemed too sexualized for workers to feel safe and comfortable). While feminists and social scientists tend to explain sexual harassment in terms of "patriarchy" and other ideologies, Browne locates the ultimate cause of both types of sexual harassment in sex differences in mating strategies.

Studies demonstrate unequivocally that men are far more interested in short-term casual sex than women. In one now-classic study, 75 percent of undergraduate men approached by an attractive female stranger agreed to have sex with her; none of the women approached by an attractive male stranger did. Many men who would not date the stranger nonetheless agreed to have sex with her.

The quid pro quo types of harassment are manifestations of men's greater desire for short-term casual sex and their willingness to use any available means to achieve that goal. Feminists often claim that sexual harassment is "not about sex but about power;" Browne contends it is both-men using power to get sex. "To say that it is only about power makes no more sense than saying that bank robbery is only about guns, not about money."

Sexual harassment cases of the hostile-environment variety result from sex differences in what men and women perceive as "overly sexual" or "hostile" behavior. Many women legitimately complain that they have been subjected to abusive, intimidating, and degrading treatment by their male coworkers. Browne points out that long before women entered the labor force, men subjected each other to such abusive, intimidating, and degrading treatment.

Abuse, intimidation, and degradation are all part of men's repertoire of tactics employed in competitive situations. In other words, men are not treating women differently from men-the definition of discrimination, under which sexual harassment legally falls-but the opposite: Men harass women precisely because they are not discriminating between men and women.

 
2013-01-19 11:31:35 AM  

Smock Pot: I don't know why women keep trying to tell men what it's like, because men are never going to get it. Ever. No matter what a woman says about this, no matter how many analogies she makes, no matter how she says it, men will respond with... pretty much everything in this thread. They will continue to act like untrained dogs around women they want to fark and shiat all over women they deem too old or too ugly to fark.


Generalization much? You're doing the same thing the article writer does. Do you see her mention the nice respectful guys she knows? No, but I can assure you, they DO EXIST. For every jackass out there that acts like that, there are many more respectfully going about their lives.
 
2013-01-19 11:32:50 AM  
What a twat, she needs a good dicking to set her straight.


Oh and nobody mentions Joe Bidens hair because he obviously had bad hair transplants, that alone should have killed Obama's win. If he can't be honest with him about how stupid it looks then you know he's lying to us!!! "You...you know that those little surgical corn rows your got look ridiculous, right?"
 
2013-01-19 11:33:15 AM  

Lenny_da_Hog: quickdraw: Lenny_da_Hog: quickdraw: Lenny_da_Hog: Instead of writing a blog, why doesn't she turn to the rude people and say, "You're rude and never going to meet anyone worthwhile that way."

Because it is dangerous to do so.

Uh-huh. Every guy in the world is just waiting to beat the shiat out of women. I guess women are just that weak. No wonder they seek out violent, beefy men.

Seriously? Cant you do better than that? Its like watching somebody box an imaginary opponent.

Ok fine Ill indulge you. This is how it works. Every person we come across has the potential to be friend or foe. When out in a setting where we could be physically vulnerable (no matter who you are) we have to size up people we meet. If a drunk obnoxious idiot is saying rude things to you its generally not wise to call them on it or insult them.

If the person may not be drunk but is larger than you, or is driving a vehicle, or holding something that looks like they might use it as a weapon then you have to think very carefully before you respond to them.

If they are a boss or coworker you have to consider whether it is worth losing your job over.

What is it about the concept of "power deferential" that you dont get?

Then any reaction she has, including the one she took -- walking down the street -- is just as much of a threat. It's still a rebuke.

I'm 6' tall and 130 pounds. I have no chest. I *will* get my ass kicked in a fight. Yet I've never gotten into one in all of my years, and have still managed to stand up for myself when people say rude things to me. Sometimes it's clear that the goal is violence, so I just walk away -- but not everyone who is rude is going to be violent as well.

That's a cop-out.


And so what you are using as your closing argument is that you, as a 6' tall man, feel safe confronting rude behavior but women dont' and so we should all behave like 6' men do?
 
2013-01-19 11:33:16 AM  
Oh boy, more postmodernist scum to put on my ignore list.
 
2013-01-19 11:33:26 AM  
Sounds like she's not tough enough to live in the Big City. You get the pros of a megalopolis, you also get the cons. The sweet with the sour.

In a smaller city men don't pull that shiat (very often). Maybe frat-bro types. But who hangs out with those dude-bros?

In a smaller city there's a distinct lack of gutter trash hanging out on street corners. Well there's a lack of people on street corners in general. Hence the awesomeness.
 
2013-01-19 11:33:53 AM  
That button is on the top of the can of pepper spray.
 
2013-01-19 11:35:09 AM  
quickdraw
ok - so one chick was rude, the woman in your office should be brought up on harassment charges and yes there are bullies in the world. Life isnt fair. But what does any of that have to do with the writer's concerns? She isnt writing about the difficulties of being a short guy. You can do that on your blog if you want.


One rule of essay writing I learned in school: if you've several arguments for your position, put the strongest one or the one that you want to stick with people at the end.
Look at the last paragraph of that article, the one mentioning rape culture and Ask your female friends, if you have any, if they've ever..
followed by a list of things that you don't even have to ask female friends about, because even as a guy built like an NFL linesman you've done those things or at least had them on your mind.
That's the thing that will stick the most with people, be the aftertaste, when they come back here after reading the article.

It's pretty obvious to me where those comments coming from if one focuses on the last paragraph - the listed things might be worse for but they're not unique to being a woman.
No wonder that ending an article about "seeing things from the other side" with something like that is rubbing some people the other way.
 
2013-01-19 11:35:54 AM  
This is stupid. Being a girl is fantastic.
 
2013-01-19 11:36:09 AM  

Buffalo77: Two women walking down the sidewalk should be able to walk and converse without some idiot chasing them asking for their "taco". Next time you see something like this, call the dude out on it, make him realize he is being an asshole.


We're already doing that. What next?
 
2013-01-19 11:37:06 AM  

Whodat: The author sounds like a narcissist.


And you sound like a clueless ass.

I love threads like this. They're such good asshole bait. As the troglodytes come slithering out, I can give the ignore button a good workout, and for the next few months the threads I follow become relatively idiot-free.

And I get a few folks worth adding to the favorites list as a bonus. Win/Win!
 
2013-01-19 11:37:09 AM  

gilgigamesh: It may be regional. I live in the South. There's a certain gentility factor: women who work in my office have the door held open for them, men wait for them to exit the elevator before exiting themselves, that sort of thing. There is a sexism at work there, but only the passive kind only your most angry feminists get worked up about.

I can only imagine that some lout who groped a woman exiting an elevator would probably find himself leaving the elevator with a few broken fingers.


This is my experience exactly. I asked my wife, who can dress up to a solid 8-9, if she gets shiat like the author describes all the time, or ever. She laughed and said she'll sometimes get a creepy old patient at work who is just subtlety off putting, and very rarely a stupid cat call that is extremely non threatening. We've lived in a few of the "bigger' cities in LA and MS, and that's been the case in all of them. The other women I know, including my sister, relate similar things. I just don't see that behavior around here, so it's hard for us to relate.
 
2013-01-19 11:37:24 AM  

DerAppie: When men do it to other men they get to hear that they should just suck it up


Yep.

A woman can get angry at a sexually suggestive comment from a man, and she is empowered and liberated. But if a man gets angry at a sexually suggestive comment from another man, he is a "homophobic" jerk. The author even talks about shoving a guy for making a comment. Is it okay for a guy to shove a guy just for making sexually suggestive comments? No. The outrage would be epic.

Please note - I think neither party should get angry in this situation. I am NOT being anti gay, I am being anti-double standard.

My own preference would be that everyone relax and stop being so uptight. But if I say that to a woman in this situation, I am a "patriarchal misogynistic chauvinist". Yet, amazingly, if I reacted like this woman does in this same situation (which I don't), I am a "homophobic intolerant bigot".
 
2013-01-19 11:37:25 AM  

megarian: This is stupid. Being a girl is fantastic.


At the risk of sounding oppressive and patriarchal, the Lord was kind to you, sis.

/Not fishing
//Old enough to be your dad.
///Rowr.
 
2013-01-19 11:37:40 AM  
Comedian Ever Mainard sums up this mindset in her excellent bit about the fact that women are constantly aware that "their rape" could happen at any time. She says, "The problem is that every woman has that one moment when you think, here's my rape!

Just asked my wife about this. At just over 40 she's had two of these moments that she can recall. That sucks.
 
2013-01-19 11:38:15 AM  

megarian: This is stupid. Being a girl is fantastic.


You don't seem the least bit real.
 
2013-01-19 11:38:29 AM  

It's Me Bender: quickdraw: Alright lets say hes terrified to tell me if some guy groped his ass at a trade show or something. Why wouldnt he tell me if he had been harassed before I met him?

Interesting how you assume that the harassment would be from a man.


quickdraw is a misandrist who thinks only men can do bad things.
 
2013-01-19 11:38:48 AM  

ExperianScaresCthulhu: quickdraw: So you go into every thread about a serious issue of widespread social injustice to complain about how it sucks to be you because youre a short white guy with a job? Your life sucks because you are ridiculously self-obsessed - not because you are short.

I'm still learning to embrace my Bitterness (tm). I still get my ass kicked about not being humble about being A Hater and Proud. There are issues with sexual harassment which do need to be dealt with. Flipping the switch (script, whatever) doesnt work, though, because men and women think differently, interact towards one another differently, interact within the group differently.

Men are being honest when they don't see the big deal as it pertains to themselves. They only see the big deal when it pertains to their posessions (the women in their lives), so you get all kind of dudes who don't do the worst stuff not because they don't want it and wouldn't want it to happen to them, but because they don't want it to happen to the women in their lives. They mean well.

If women want to really flip it, they have to aim for the shiat that affects men as men, the shiat that personally offends men, the shiat that society pushes to make men feel lesser, weaker, less in control, less sure about themselves. So, what are those things?

Height's an easy one, because it's continually overlooked (just like men's issues can be overlooked). Again, unlike all the very superficial shiat named for women, height is something a man cannot control. He doesn't have to face catcalls from construction crews; his obstacle course is different, but it can still grind down on the soul.

Those who fail become Napoleonic (just like women who fail become Bitter) as a defense mechanism. You know what I mean?


Yeah... cops.
 
2013-01-19 11:39:09 AM  

dopekitty74: My opinion as a formerly not-bad looking chick with a great rack is that this lady needs to lighten the hell up. I went from wolf whistles and catcalls to people i don't know driving by and making fun of me for being fat. I'd much rather the wolf whistles and nice rack comments. At least those made me feel good about my body.

Also needs to stop being so damned paranoid. I used to live in Edmonton, AB, and walked home from work at night without all these paranoid delusions about people waiting in the shadows to rape me. I was more worried about the whores who would try to attack me if i didn't give them a cigarette


really? you needed a bunch of mouth breathers yelling out of cars to make you feel good about your body? you make me embarrassed to be a fellow Albertan. Jesus.

It isn't just the cat calls and wolf whistles. it's walking down the street with one guy trailing you 10 feet behind, while his buddies cruise beside you in the car... as you try to figure out which house looks safe enough to run to. \this was when i was 14.
it's crying into your pillow because the guy you didn't want to fark just finished...but you were stupid enough to believe the line "it's ok, we'll just cuddle..."
it's standing in line at the farking SUBWAY sandwich shop while the guy behind you trails his finger down your ass. You turn to glare, and he licks his lips and says he'd rather eat you...

I am STILL not done with this crap. 43, and i still have to put up with guys feeling like it's ok to do this...

don't you understand that that kind of behaviour, and your attitude about it, that perpetuates the behaviour? Would you want your daughter to have to be subjected to it? i know i don't want mine to be.

you know what's really sickening? that this is in Canada. and the Canadian "rape culture" is a tiny fraction of what it is in the States. I can only imagine what it is like for women in the States, where there is 30 times the number of reported rapes, compared to here. So please... just because YOU never got raped after being stupid enough to walk down a deserted street at night, doesn't mean we are all wrong, and that you were not in legitimate danger.
 
2013-01-19 11:39:56 AM  

jimmajim: WhippingBoy: jimmajim: So the consensus in this thread is that the guys described in TFA did nothing wrong? There's no point in criticizing their behavior, boys will be boys, right? wink wink nudge nudge.

Who said that? Be specific.

No one did -- my point is that there's plenty of criticism in here of TFA's author, but, strangely, no criticism of the behavior that she describes.


Right. We're just supposed to feel guilty over the actions of some guys that we've never met and have no control over. I'm sure you wouldn't be jumping all over the author if it were a man complaining about "women" either. Go fark yourself.
 
2013-01-19 11:40:15 AM  

Bored Horde: Two examples of celebrities.

In the business world, if you're a man, as long as your hair is short and under control, everyone ignores it. It's a check box item. Women's hair gets graded. Men's clothing is the same - it's pass/fail, either the suit is clean, pressed, and fits or it's bad. Women's clothing gets graded for appearance, fashion, and riding the thin line between dowdy and slutty.

If you don't understand this then you're not ready to participate in a discussion about the matter - go read some farking books.


FTA:
with coverage of female politicians and ask yourself whether anyone would spend this much time discussing Joe Biden's hairstyles.

My reference to the article was about celebrity, not common joe/jolene and their hair.

If you didn't understand that, get help, you have issues with reality and context.
 
2013-01-19 11:40:27 AM  

RassilonsExWife: Whodat: The author sounds like a narcissist.

And you sound like a clueless ass.

I love threads like this. They're such good asshole bait. As the troglodytes come slithering out, I can give the ignore button a good workout, and for the next few months the threads I follow become relatively idiot-free.

And I get a few folks worth adding to the favorites list as a bonus. Win/Win!


Rather than bragging about how outraged you are, how about contributing something meaningful to the discussion?
 
2013-01-19 11:41:12 AM  

The Voice of Doom: quickdraw
ok - so one chick was rude, the woman in your office should be brought up on harassment charges and yes there are bullies in the world. Life isnt fair. But what does any of that have to do with the writer's concerns? She isnt writing about the difficulties of being a short guy. You can do that on your blog if you want.

One rule of essay writing I learned in school: if you've several arguments for your position, put the strongest one or the one that you want to stick with people at the end.
Look at the last paragraph of that article, the one mentioning rape culture and Ask your female friends, if you have any, if they've ever..
followed by a list of things that you don't even have to ask female friends about, because even as a guy built like an NFL linesman you've done those things or at least had them on your mind.
That's the thing that will stick the most with people, be the aftertaste, when they come back here after reading the article.

It's pretty obvious to me where those comments coming from if one focuses on the last paragraph - the listed things might be worse for but they're not unique to being a woman.
No wonder that ending an article about "seeing things from the other side" with something like that is rubbing some people the other way.


I would agree with you except these are the same exact comments that come up every time an article like this is linked. You get whole posse' of guys loaded with false equivocations - whining about how tough men have it and how not all men are bad.

Actually though I am much heartened by the way Fark has evolved over the years. It used to be those kinds "Help I'm a white male being oppressed by women who dont like to be harassed" comments were 90% of a thread. Now they are only 60%.

Progress!
 
2013-01-19 11:41:30 AM  

noitsnot: megarian: This is stupid. Being a girl is fantastic.

You don't seem the least bit real.


I'm not. At all. Smoke and mirrors?
 
2013-01-19 11:41:47 AM  

gilgigamesh: "Sexual harrassment is the wrong man noticing your tits."

Or specifically, as the author described, "middle aged".


That was one example.
 
2013-01-19 11:41:50 AM  

ThrobblefootSpectre: DerAppie: When men do it to other men they get to hear that they should just suck it up

Yep.

A woman can get angry at a sexually suggestive comment from a man, and she is empowered and liberated. But if a man gets angry at a sexually suggestive comment from another man, he is a "homophobic" jerk. The author even talks about shoving a guy for making a comment. Is it okay for a guy to shove a guy just for making sexually suggestive comments? No. The outrage would be epic.

Please note - I think neither party should get angry in this situation. I am NOT being anti gay, I am being anti-double standard.

My own preference would be that everyone relax and stop being so uptight. But if I say that to a woman in this situation, I am a "patriarchal misogynistic chauvinist". Yet, amazingly, if I reacted like this woman does in this same situation (which I don't), I am a "homophobic intolerant bigot".


A gay guy gave me a compliment once. I was just flattered that someone found me attractive in any way.
 
2013-01-19 11:42:52 AM  

quickdraw: And so what you are using as your closing argument is that you, as a 6' tall man, feel safe confronting rude behavior but women dont' and so we should all behave like 6' men do?


Picture 6' and 130 lbs. Just picture it in your head. No-one is physically intimidated by me, yet I still find ways to get my point across in face-to-face interaction.

All the women friends I have are able to do that -- I've seen it in action -- and I've never seen any of them get into fisticuffs with men or women. Usually the offender just shuts up and wanders to the other side of the bar.
 
2013-01-19 11:43:34 AM  

Bored Horde: Women have to be average to slightly-above-average looking, thin but not too thin, fashionable without being slutty or dowdy, done up without going too far - women live on a razor's edge that doesn't exist for men. Everything a woman does is open for judgement, in a way that isn't true for men. Go farking talk to some women. Ask them how stressful buying a skirt is - is it fashionable or slutty to have a hemline 2 inches above their knees? What if they're self-conscious about their knees and want to wear a below-the-knees skirt - will people subconsciously regard them as too conservative and pass them over for big projects or management positions?


Funny thing is that most of the judgement is coming from women against other women.
 
2013-01-19 11:43:38 AM  

AJisaff: this is in Canada. and the Canadian "rape culture" is a tiny fraction of what it is in the States.


There is no "rape culture". There's criminal culture. And as soon as we get back to stringing up that faction of it and tossing them in lime pits and quit acting like dime store criminals, pirate bankers and thugs are some kind of rock stars, we'll all be safer.
 
2013-01-19 11:43:45 AM  

megarian: noitsnot: megarian: This is stupid. Being a girl is fantastic.

You don't seem the least bit real.

I'm not. At all. Smoke and mirrors?


Like Lindsay Lohan. Except she's more the cocaine on the mirrors than the mirrors themselves.
 
2013-01-19 11:44:03 AM  
Also, thanks to some helpful Farkers in the thread for helping me understand that yoga pants are now included in the set of things I can't wear unless I want to be Asking For It.

Jeezus... Some of you are embarrassing.
 
2013-01-19 11:45:21 AM  

Lenny_da_Hog: Picture 6' and 130 lbs. Just picture it in your head. No-one is physically intimidated by me, yet I still find ways to get my point across in face-to-face interaction.

All the women friends I have are able to do that -- I've seen it in action -- and I've never seen any of them get into fisticuffs with men or women. Usually the offender just shuts up and wanders to the other side of the bar.


Usually being the operative word. I know a guy who had the same philosophy you have, until a homeless guy stabbed him with a pair of scissors.
 
2013-01-19 11:45:40 AM  

THE GREAT NAME: It's Me Bender: quickdraw: Alright lets say hes terrified to tell me if some guy groped his ass at a trade show or something. Why wouldnt he tell me if he had been harassed before I met him?

Interesting how you assume that the harassment would be from a man.

quickdraw is a misandrist who thinks only men can do bad things.


LOL! kisses!

mmmm bad things........

/brb gonna go give hubby his morning beej
 
2013-01-19 11:46:27 AM  

LouDobbsAwaaaay: megarian: noitsnot: megarian: This is stupid. Being a girl is fantastic.

You don't seem the least bit real.

I'm not. At all. Smoke and mirrors?

Like Lindsay Lohan. Except she's more the cocaine on the mirrors than the mirrors themselves.


I like to do my coke off of hookers. Their shame and body glitter gives the high that extra something special. I'm sure Lindsay can relate. Mirrors are overrated.
 
2013-01-19 11:46:28 AM  

Dansker: ExperianScaresCthulhu:
I see what you're saying, and agree with it. Again, leads back to the ho doth protest too much. She's not really, she's bragging. See also: hos who make a point of pointing out their BMI when it's on the low end.

I'm guessing you don't have any female friends.


Why? Women are just as likely to dislike asshat women as men are to dislike asshat men. The only difference is that asshat women use cultural weapons like feminism, rape-claims etc to intimidate everyone including other women. This makes it harder for women as a whole to self-police. But if we, as men, simply ignore the asshat women, we can get along with the rest of them just fine.
 
2013-01-19 11:47:46 AM  

KiwDaWabbit: A gay guy gave me a compliment once. I was just flattered that someone found me attractive in any way.


Yep, exactly. BINGO!

I was a barback in a sports bar for some 10 years until recently. Over the years I got hit on by a lot of guys. Ranging from flattering comments to my body (yes it's flattering, even from another guy), to rather rude requests to let them blow me. I never once shoved anyone, I never got angry, I never blogged about what a victim I was. My reaction ranged from being flattered, to a simple "No thanks" for the more forward propositions.
 
2013-01-19 11:47:56 AM  
ITT: A whole bunch of Farkers I thought were cool turn out to be troglodytes.
Screw this. It's saturday. I'm gonna get drunk and not shout at random women.
 
2013-01-19 11:48:00 AM  
A female acquaintance of mine wanted me to take her out to a local gay bar. When I asked why, she said, "So you can see what it's like being flirted with by people you don't want to have sex with."

I replied, "How about I *not* go to the gay bar, so I don't give any of the guys the impression that I'm looking for a one night stand."

/she never spoke to me again
//and died at the hands of her abusive boyfriend a year ago
 
2013-01-19 11:48:15 AM  

Parmenius: I have  never treated women -or anyone else- as depicted in tfa, but I've certainly had to deal with the effects  of their foolishness.  And, with rare exceptions, if someone is behaving with all the civility of a gutter snipe it is a man doing it.  I really dislike having to prove that those jackasses don't represent my gender, and threads like this do not help.


Neither have we, you idiot. Maybe, just maybe, that is why we get a tad fed up with constantly being accused of it.
 
2013-01-19 11:48:37 AM  

LouDobbsAwaaaay: Lenny_da_Hog: Picture 6' and 130 lbs. Just picture it in your head. No-one is physically intimidated by me, yet I still find ways to get my point across in face-to-face interaction.

All the women friends I have are able to do that -- I've seen it in action -- and I've never seen any of them get into fisticuffs with men or women. Usually the offender just shuts up and wanders to the other side of the bar.

Usually being the operative word. I know a guy who had the same philosophy you have, until a homeless guy stabbed him with a pair of scissors.


I'm sure the ensuing blog post made a lot of difference there, too.
 
2013-01-19 11:50:04 AM  

quickdraw: And so what you are using as your closing argument is that you, as a 6' tall man, feel safe confronting rude behavior but women dont' and so we should all behave like 6' men do?


Did you read the 130 lb part? Being average height and having your own penis doesn't make you a master of hand to hand combat.
 
2013-01-19 11:51:25 AM  

Tatterdemalian: A female acquaintance of mine wanted me to take her out to a local gay bar. When I asked why, she said, "So you can see what it's like being flirted with by people you don't want to have sex with."

I replied, "How about I *not* go to the gay bar, so I don't give any of the guys the impression that I'm looking for a one night stand."

/she never spoke to me again
//and died at the hands of her abusive boyfriend a year ago


Well you sure showed her didn't you Te'o
 
2013-01-19 11:51:37 AM  

ThrobblefootSpectre: KiwDaWabbit: A gay guy gave me a compliment once. I was just flattered that someone found me attractive in any way.

Yep, exactly. BINGO!

I was a barback in a sports bar for some 10 years until recently. Over the years I got hit on by a lot of guys. Ranging from flattering comments to my body (yes it's flattering, even from another guy), to rather rude requests to let them blow me. I never once shoved anyone, I never got angry, I never blogged about what a victim I was. My reaction ranged from being flattered, to a simple "No thanks" for the more forward propositions.


Well, you were working in a sports bar that I'm guessing probably catered to men, so I'm not exactly surprised you'd get hit on a lot. Now if you are getting the same thing from complete strangers while walking down the street at night that might be a little different.
 
2013-01-19 11:52:00 AM  

RassilonsExWife: Whodat: The author sounds like a narcissist.

And you sound like a clueless ass.

I love threads like this. They're such good asshole bait. As the troglodytes come slithering out, I can give the ignore button a good workout, and for the next few months the threads I follow become relatively idiot-free.


So you seek out opportunities to put people on ignore? Why would you go looking for comments that you would then prevent yourself from being able to read?

You're the sort of person who strikes up conversations with strangers in the street, only to turn them into arguments, having driven your friends, family and everyone who ever loved you away years ago.
 
2013-01-19 11:52:36 AM  

ExperianScaresCthulhu: Parmenius: I wonder how many people in this thread would have the courage to make their comments in person.  I wonder whether they actually conduct themselves in this barbaric way, or if it's just the Internet Misogyny Brigade.

I have  never treated women -or anyone else- as depicted in tfa, but I've certainly had to deal with the effects  of their foolishness.   And, with rare exceptions, if someone is behaving with all the civility of a gutter snipe it is a man doing it.  I really dislike having to prove that those jackasses don't represent my gender, and threads like this do not help.

You've never worked in all-female offices as the lone man, have you ;) (anyway, I still see what you're saying.)


Actually, my college job was in the personnel office at the college - only man with 25 or so female co-ops and 15 or so adult female staff.  I had attention, but not in a negative way...
 
2013-01-19 11:52:43 AM  
basically everyone sympathizes with the scared young female, but your self defense *gasp* is your farking responsibility, you are a creature, an animal, you are not special, you cannot magically alter and abate the laws of reality and nature because of your indoctrinated upbringing.

whining on the internet about how this shiat sucks is like a squirrel whining about the lack of nuts in farking winter.

grow up, grow a pair, be happy you live in this part of HIStory, and realize that shiat is going to get way farking worse in this country, sorry, there's not going to be any omniscient force looking out for you, deal with it.

when it all comes down you will be groveling at the feet of the local "patriarchy" begging to be let into a functional society.

this is a much bigger and more real issue than the prevalence of "rape culture"..
 
2013-01-19 11:52:46 AM  

umad: Parmenius: I have  never treated women -or anyone else- as depicted in tfa, but I've certainly had to deal with the effects  of their foolishness.  And, with rare exceptions, if someone is behaving with all the civility of a gutter snipe it is a man doing it.  I really dislike having to prove that those jackasses don't represent my gender, and threads like this do not help.

Neither have we, you idiot. Maybe, just maybe, that is why we get a tad fed up with constantly being accused of it.


Don't you dare try to defend yourself, you minsogynst troglodyte!
 
2013-01-19 11:52:56 AM  

bunner: AJisaff: this is in Canada. and the Canadian "rape culture" is a tiny fraction of what it is in the States.

There is no "rape culture". There's criminal culture. And as soon as we get back to stringing up that faction of it and tossing them in lime pits and quit acting like dime store criminals, pirate bankers and thugs are some kind of rock stars, we'll all be safer.


ok, i totally agree with you... and favorited you too...

good point.
 
2013-01-19 11:53:07 AM  

Pincy: Well, you were working in a sports bar that I'm guessing probably catered to men, so I'm not exactly surprised you'd get hit on a lot. Now if you are getting the same thing from complete strangers while walking down the street at night that might be a little different.


And is it okay for a guy on the street to get angry (or even start shoving) over a suggestive comment from another guy?
 
2013-01-19 11:53:54 AM  

Lenny_da_Hog: I'm sure the ensuing blog post made a lot of difference there, too.


Funny. This looks like a response, yet it actually contains nothing at all in reference to what it was responding to.
 
2013-01-19 11:54:50 AM  

One Bad Apple: Well you sure showed her didn't you Te'o


What cheap bag of dogsh*t you left on that guy's porch. Guess you told him.

There's nothing quite as scary as women who need to take the metrics of THEIR sh*tty relationship and start demanding answers from people who aren't in it, regardless of who is on which side of that.

The answer is on the other side of the bed. Not in some random friend guy who you think has some 'splainin to do. And she didn't notice that. And was murdered.

And he lost a friend and all you can do is bite your lip and giggle at your endlessly witty remark. *click*
 
2013-01-19 11:55:53 AM  

Pincy: Comedian Ever Mainard sums up this mindset in her excellent bit about the fact that women are constantly aware that "their rape" could happen at any time. She says, "The problem is that every woman has that one moment when you think, here's my rape!

Just asked my wife about this. At just over 40 she's had two of these moments that she can recall. That sucks.


So now a woman doesn't even have to be raped to be a victim of rape? Get real. Things happen that scare us sometimes.
 
2013-01-19 11:55:58 AM  

THE GREAT NAME: So you seek out opportunities to put people on ignore? Why would you go looking for comments that you would then prevent yourself from being able to read?


Confirmation bias. A lot of people flock to these types of threads in order to reinforce their world view.

Men are misogynistic troglodytes. See? This Fark thread proves it.
 
2013-01-19 11:56:07 AM  

AJisaff: ok, i totally agree with you... and favorited you too...


Well, bless your heart. : )
 
2013-01-19 11:56:07 AM  

umad: Parmenius: I have  never treated women -or anyone else- as depicted in tfa, but I've certainly had to deal with the effects  of their foolishness.  And, with rare exceptions, if someone is behaving with all the civility of a gutter snipe it is a man doing it.  I really dislike having to prove that those jackasses don't represent my gender, and threads like this do not help.

Neither have we, you idiot. Maybe, just maybe, that is why we get a tad fed up with constantly being accused of it.


I'm not sure who the "we" is here.  As of my post, you hadn't been in this thread, at least not with that login.
 
2013-01-19 11:56:55 AM  

bunner: AJisaff: ok, i totally agree with you... and favorited you too...

Well, bless your heart. : )


Ditto.
 
2013-01-19 11:57:40 AM  

Bored Horde: Frederick: So being really attractive is a two sided coin, eh?  Who woulda thought.

Of course on the other side of the coin is; greater salaries,  undeserved promotions, more lenient sentences, ugh, lets stop the list there.....

I wonder why your article didnt mention how your husband deals with your attractiveness?

Good looking men get more money and raise through the ranks faster. Good looking women get sidelined into pretty-face positions.

Women have to be average to slightly-above-average looking, thin but not too thin, fashionable without being slutty or dowdy, done up without going too far - women live on a razor's edge that doesn't exist for men. Everything a woman does is open for judgement, in a way that isn't true for men. Go farking talk to some women. Ask them how stressful buying a skirt is - is it fashionable or slutty to have a hemline 2 inches above their knees? What if they're self-conscious about their knees and want to wear a below-the-knees skirt - will people subconsciously regard them as too conservative and pass them over for big projects or management positions?

Talk to women. Check your assumptions, and listen with an open mind. Remember that all the problems they list - obsessing over being taken seriously, obsessing over avoiding or feeling guilty about inviting unwanted attention, obsessing over their appearance - these are all on top of the normal life stresses. Being a woman doesn't let you off the hook from your health, paying the bills, keeping your car in good working order, and all the other annoyances of life.

If you're not interested in doing this then just recognize that you don't have the perspective and knowledge to empathize with being a woman. You should just consider that many attractive women who age feel relief (and guilt over that relief) when they become "invisible" and are no longer subject to all that extra special attention. Some also feel crushed because most of their male friends were just in it to bump bits for a few minutes, and years of companionship and shared experience were apparently for naught.


No guy notices those small details and makes grand assumptions about the person wearing it. That's firmly and absolutely an issue created and perpetuated by other women.
 
2013-01-19 11:57:52 AM  

ThrobblefootSpectre: Pincy: Well, you were working in a sports bar that I'm guessing probably catered to men, so I'm not exactly surprised you'd get hit on a lot. Now if you are getting the same thing from complete strangers while walking down the street at night that might be a little different.

And is it okay for a guy on the street to get angry (or even start shoving) over a suggestive comment from another guy?


Only if you were trying to find the proper equivalency which- in this case-- would be a female being subject to unwanted comments out on the street by other females.

I don't think guys tend to get as bunched up about unsolicited comments from females as females seem to.
 
2013-01-19 11:58:16 AM  

cabbyman: [slowfacts.files.wordpress.com image 600x367]


You need a companion one showing a crying, battered woman with the caption "Your elected representatives wanted to disarm her rapist. The NRA said no."
 
2013-01-19 11:58:20 AM  

ThrobblefootSpectre: Pincy: Well, you were working in a sports bar that I'm guessing probably catered to men, so I'm not exactly surprised you'd get hit on a lot. Now if you are getting the same thing from complete strangers while walking down the street at night that might be a little different.

And is it okay for a guy on the street to get angry (or even start shoving) over a suggestive comment from another guy?


I don't think it's okay, or advisable, for anyone to do that. But it does not mean the original behavior is okay. Do you agree?
 
2013-01-19 11:59:09 AM  
Don't fret your poor head about it little girl, you're on Fark now so everything's gonna get better for you.
 
2013-01-19 11:59:51 AM  

quickdraw: And so what you are using as your closing argument is that you, as a 6' tall man, feel safe confronting rude behavior but women dont' and so we should all behave like 6' men do?


It's weird that you focus only on the height, and don't look at the weight he mentions.

Just so you know, there's generally more to intimidation than height. You may not realize how skinny 6' tall and 130lbs is-I do, because I'm in that same weight and height range.

That is "Ribs are visible if shirt is off" skinny. "Ribcage is jutting out slightly BEFORE you inhale" skinny. If you inhale all the way, you sort of start looking like skeletor.

It is "You look like some sort of raggedy monkey twigman" skinny. Generally comes with reaaallllyyy gangly arms and legs.

Now, while this DOES turn your elbows into deadly, deadly, boney protrusions of doom, it is generally not very intimidating looking, at least not to those that might be looking for violence/looking to do harm (which is who the Weenerser was *talking* about.)

There really wasn't any need to imply "Oh you big brave SIX FOOT TALL MAN, it's easy for you!" when he basically pointed out that, due to his weight, a large number of people could *bench press him*. Especially those who one would have need to be afraid off due to violence.
 
2013-01-19 11:59:54 AM  

bunner:


What cheap bag of dogsh*t you left on that guy's porch. Guess you told him.

There's nothing quite as scary as women who need to take the metrics of THEIR sh*tty relationship and start demanding answers from people who aren't in it, regardless of who is on which side of that.

The answer is on the other side of the bed. Not in some random friend guy who you think has some 'splainin to do. And she didn't notice that. And was murdered.

And he lost a friend and all you can do is bite your lip and giggle at your endlessly witty remark. *click*



You're right. How can I be so insensitive at the death of an imaginary girl at the hands of her fake abusive boyfriend. I hope they lock me up in the same sham prison that he went to.


For the record the bag of flaming poo trick works better with a ziplock baggie filled with gasoline or rubbing alcohol depending on lighting conditions.
 
2013-01-19 12:00:21 PM  

clowncar on fire: Only if you were trying to find the proper equivalency which- in this case-- would be a female being subject to unwanted comments out on the street by other females.


The subject is sexual advances from men. It happens to women, and it happens to men.
 
2013-01-19 12:00:47 PM  

tirob: I do not recall my ever uttering any of the kinds of things the writer mentions to any woman or girl anywhere, at any time, nor do I recall any of my buddies ever having done so.

A good bit of what the writer describes in TFA would be classified as disorderly conduct here. May I suggest, ladies, that you all look up the relevant statutes where you are and that, if you are sufficiently alarmed by this kind of thing, you call a cop the next time it happens.

/I sense that the writer is bragging just a little bit....


Actually, what she can do is select a different venue. One that is not patronized by the type of men she described.

Pro-tip 1: if you go to a dive bar, you are going to run into people who go to dive bars.
Pro-tip 2: if you go to a meat market bar/club, expect to get "looked at" by people looking to pick up a piece of meat as you just put yourself into the display case.

Bottom line is, take responsibility for your own actions and choices.
 
2013-01-19 12:00:57 PM  

THE GREAT NAME: Pincy: Comedian Ever Mainard sums up this mindset in her excellent bit about the fact that women are constantly aware that "their rape" could happen at any time. She says, "The problem is that every woman has that one moment when you think, here's my rape!

Just asked my wife about this. At just over 40 she's had two of these moments that she can recall. That sucks.

So now a woman doesn't even have to be raped to be a victim of rape? Get real. Things happen that scare us sometimes.


Did I say she was a victim of rape? NO. I said she thought she was going to be raped. One if definitely worse than the other but it still sucks that women have to constantly be on their guard.

As a man, I can honestly say that I have never once thought to myself "I think I'm going to be raped". My guess is the percentage of men who have never had this feeling is much much higher than the percentage of women. To pretend otherwise is ridiculous.
 
2013-01-19 12:01:27 PM  

ThrobblefootSpectre: KiwDaWabbit: A gay guy gave me a compliment once. I was just flattered that someone found me attractive in any way.

Yep, exactly. BINGO!

I was a barback in a sports bar for some 10 years until recently. Over the years I got hit on by a lot of guys. Ranging from flattering comments to my body (yes it's flattering, even from another guy), to rather rude requests to let them blow me. I never once shoved anyone, I never got angry, I never blogged about what a victim I was. My reaction ranged from being flattered, to a simple "No thanks" for the more forward propositions.


Last couple of Halloween my female friends all want to go to these bars in Boytown in Chicago. Polite to crude come ons all night.... never felt offended. Now..... this is just one night a year.... I can see how this type of behavior would be annoying if it was 365 days a year of gay guys grabbing my ass. However, if it was women I'd be in heaven and that's the disconnect that women don't get.
 
2013-01-19 12:02:09 PM  

Polyhazard: Also, thanks to some helpful Farkers in the thread for helping me understand that yoga pants are now included in the set of things I can't wear unless I want to be Asking For It.

Jeezus... Some of you are embarrassing.


You're cherry picking comments in order to rationalize your feelings of "outrage".
Why else would you give credence to the opinion of a single anonymous poster on the internet?
 
2013-01-19 12:02:52 PM  
 
2013-01-19 12:03:25 PM  

clowncar on fire: ThrobblefootSpectre: Pincy: Well, you were working in a sports bar that I'm guessing probably catered to men, so I'm not exactly surprised you'd get hit on a lot. Now if you are getting the same thing from complete strangers while walking down the street at night that might be a little different.

And is it okay for a guy on the street to get angry (or even start shoving) over a suggestive comment from another guy?

Only if you were trying to find the proper equivalency which- in this case-- would be a female being subject to unwanted comments out on the street by other females.

I don't think guys tend to get as bunched up about unsolicited comments from females as females seem to.


Ya, probably not, since very rarely is a woman going to rape a guy. It's easy for guys to laugh it off or take it as a compliment when the thought of being raped never crosses their mind.
 
2013-01-19 12:03:27 PM  

Arthur Jumbles: Bored Horde: Women have to be average to slightly-above-average looking, thin but not too thin, fashionable without being slutty or dowdy, done up without going too far - women live on a razor's edge that doesn't exist for men. Everything a woman does is open for judgement, in a way that isn't true for men. Go farking talk to some women. Ask them how stressful buying a skirt is - is it fashionable or slutty to have a hemline 2 inches above their knees? What if they're self-conscious about their knees and want to wear a below-the-knees skirt - will people subconsciously regard them as too conservative and pass them over for big projects or management positions?

Funny thing is that most of the judgement is coming from women against other women.


Agree. Women are judged more, but they're also more judgemental. Most of the judging is girl-on-girl. It's only thanks to socialists and their evil plan to split society into "perpetrator" and "survivor" groups that people attribute any of this to men.

Women who work in genuinely male-dominated places get to wear what they want. When evil leftists like quickdraw come along and stuff the place with lazy maternity-seeking women with rubber-stamped qualifications is when things get biatchy.
 
2013-01-19 12:05:37 PM  

bunner: AJisaff: ok, i totally agree with you... and favorited you too...

Well, bless your heart. : )


you're welcome
 
2013-01-19 12:05:53 PM  
Besides, you're out at a bar and you happened across a pair of lovely birds carrying on about what type of meat they wish to stuff in their tocos- this is truly the fodder of comic legend that any guy with a sense of humor would be obligated to not chip in and comment on.

"Let me get this right- she was lying there on the couch, partially nude and begging for it and you did what again? Thanked her for the coffee and politely left?!" Yeah. Like one of those type of situations.
 
2013-01-19 12:05:56 PM  

theflatline: She seems to think she is more attractive than she really is, I can tell she used to be overweight and now is a cute chubby, but those complexes that develop during the fat years tend to run deep through an ex fatties life.  So while they want to be the cheerleader, they become pseudo hipsters and even worse, bloggers.   And no man is then good looking enough for them, and they hate the really pretty girls.

Here are some bits from her other ramblings, cause you know they never seen a white chick in India, and there are no hot women in Spain which forces Spaniards to hit on sandal wearing hostel dwellers.

" Sometimes, I go to countries where the presence of a wandering single white woman is an attraction in and of itself. There are probably at least a hundred Indians with surreptitious cell phone pictures of me; apparently I was just that photogenic ."


"He approached me, and said something in Catalan I didn't understand. I responded in Spanish, telling him to have a good night, and waving him away. For a block, he hovered just a few feet over my shoulder. He approached again, lightly grabbing my elbow. Though the precise language of his proposition was lost on me, the gist was clear: American girls all have a price, what was mine? "


[grassroots.groupon.com image 260x300]

[www.womensadventuremagazine.com image 336x448]


When you stop with the vaganiamony or the by me stuff and i rub my tits on you
Mybe you get treated better the common whores
 
2013-01-19 12:05:58 PM  

DerAppie: lordjupiter: The women were asked to rate the degree to which they felt sexually harassed.

And this is where everything breaks down.


Ten Politically Incorrect Truths About Human Nature
Alan S. Miller Ph.D., Satoshi Kanazawa Ph.D.

Men sexually harass women because they are not sexist

An unfortunate consequence of the ever-growing number of women joining the labor force and working side by side with men is the increasing number of sexual harassment cases. Why must sexual harassment be a necessary consequence of the sexual integration of the workplace?

Psychologist Kingsley R. Browne identifies two types of sexual harassment cases: the quid pro quo ("You must sleep with me if you want to keep your job or be promoted") and the "hostile environment" (the workplace is deemed too sexualized for workers to feel safe and comfortable). While feminists and social scientists tend to explain sexual harassment in terms of "patriarchy" and other ideologies, Browne locates the ultimate cause of both types of sexual harassment in sex differences in mating strategies.

Studies demonstrate unequivocally that men are far more interested in short-term casual sex than women. In one now-classic study, 75 percent of undergraduate men approached by an attractive female stranger agreed to have sex with her; none of the women approached by an attractive male stranger did. Many men who would not date the stranger nonetheless agreed to have sex with her.

The quid pro quo types of harassment are manifestations of men's greater desire for short-term casual sex and their willingness to use any available means to achieve that goal. Feminists often claim that sexual harassment is "not about sex but about power;" Browne contends it is both-men using power to get sex. "To say that it is only about power makes no more sense than saying that bank robbery is only about guns, not about money."

Sexual harassment cases of the hostile-environment variety result from sex ...



This is kind of half-baked in that it seems to be trying to divide "sexual harassment" into two terms that can be reduced to something other than what the actual term means. If men are just after sex via power and not the other way around, then they are NOT treating women in the workplace the same as men, as the author contends.

Maybe cracking jokes in the presence of women and treating them like "one of the guys" is indeed an attempt at "equality", but that doesn't lead to the conclusion that "men sexually harass women because they are not sexist". That's absurd.
 
2013-01-19 12:06:08 PM  

WhippingBoy: You're cherry picking comments in order to rationalize your feelings of "outrage".
Why else would you give credence to the opinion of a single anonymous poster on the internet?


She doesn't have to cherry pick comments. There are a shiatload of comments in this thread to find the "misogynistic troglodytes" as you tried to ironically call them. Sad thing is, it's not ironic. And you're one of the worst offenders by far. Glad you gave yourself your own farkie for me.
 
2013-01-19 12:06:17 PM  

Zarquon's Flat Tire: Being average height and having your own penis doesn't make you a master of hand to hand combat.


Average man's height in the US is 5'10".

Someone who is 6 feet tall is almost a standard deviation to the right, i.e. tall. The story above by a farker who was told he must be "6 foot tall to ride the ride" kind of illustrates the issue that "short" men have. That woman is immediately ruling out 60-70% of men. Idiotic, but the attitude remains.

/5'11" in the morning before the weight of the world drags me down
 
2013-01-19 12:08:10 PM  
Didn't happen. None of it.
 
2013-01-19 12:08:28 PM  

WhippingBoy: While I sympathize somewhat, I have a couple of problems with articles like this:

1. There's a subtle suggestion that this type of harassment and/or unwanted attention NEVER happens to men
2. There's a underlying belief that "men" (in general) condone these types of actions
3. The "outrage" seems to be for the express purpose of generating blog hits

There's jerks in life; we encounter them every day. To attribute an given individual's jerky behaviour to any conveniently defined "group" is intellectually dishonest. If I were to put blinders on and conveniently ignore those instances where persons of my gender were jerks to me (and instead focused only on those instances where person of the opposite gender were jerks to me), I could become a social justice crusader.


Stop being rational on Fark.

That kind of behavior isn't looked upon very kindly 'round these parts.
 
2013-01-19 12:08:41 PM  

Pincy: clowncar on fire: ThrobblefootSpectre: Pincy: Well, you were working in a sports bar that I'm guessing probably catered to men, so I'm not exactly surprised you'd get hit on a lot. Now if you are getting the same thing from complete strangers while walking down the street at night that might be a little different.

And is it okay for a guy on the street to get angry (or even start shoving) over a suggestive comment from another guy?

Only if you were trying to find the proper equivalency which- in this case-- would be a female being subject to unwanted comments out on the street by other females.

I don't think guys tend to get as bunched up about unsolicited comments from females as females seem to.

Ya, probably not, since very rarely is a woman going to rape a guy. It's easy for guys to laugh it off or take it as a compliment when the thought of being raped never crosses their mind.


And you actually believe that all unsolicited comments end in rapey rape?
 
2013-01-19 12:08:48 PM  

WhippingBoy: Polyhazard: Also, thanks to some helpful Farkers in the thread for helping me understand that yoga pants are now included in the set of things I can't wear unless I want to be Asking For It.

Jeezus... Some of you are embarrassing.

You're cherry picking comments in order to rationalize your feelings of "outrage".
Why else would you give credence to the opinion of a single anonymous poster on the internet?


Hey look, it's someone else who sees some creeps being called out and takes it upon himself to universalize it and take it personally.
 
2013-01-19 12:09:12 PM  
Wow. The amount of sexism and "what about the few men this happens to!" in the first page alone already makes me want to vomit. The world is such a mean place to all you fragile, sad, pathetic men of Fark.
 
2013-01-19 12:09:24 PM  

Arthur Jumbles: I can see how this type of behavior would be annoying if it was 365 days a year of gay guys grabbing my ass.


Okay, well, just to clarify....it wasn't 365/24/7. I didn't mean to give that impression. More like once every couple of months. And only very rarely (maybe twice) in 10 years was it unsolicited ass-grabbing.
 
2013-01-19 12:09:53 PM  

Arthur Jumbles: However, if it was women I'd be in heaven and that's the disconnect that women don't get.


So you aren't a woman yet you think you can speak for women?
 
2013-01-19 12:10:14 PM  

Pincy: clowncar on fire: ThrobblefootSpectre: Pincy: Well, you were working in a sports bar that I'm guessing probably catered to men, so I'm not exactly surprised you'd get hit on a lot. Now if you are getting the same thing from complete strangers while walking down the street at night that might be a little different.

And is it okay for a guy on the street to get angry (or even start shoving) over a suggestive comment from another guy?

Only if you were trying to find the proper equivalency which- in this case-- would be a female being subject to unwanted comments out on the street by other females.

I don't think guys tend to get as bunched up about unsolicited comments from females as females seem to.

Ya, probably not, since very rarely is a woman going to rape a guy. It's easy for guys to laugh it off or take it as a compliment when the thought of being raped never crosses their mind.


yup. statistically, 86% of rape victims are female, and 99% of rapists are male.

Recently, a 15 year old girl with 5 other teenage and early adult males were charged with rape in Prince George, BC. they lured two young teenage boys into an apartment, beat the shiat out of them and raped them.

What kind of upbringing do you have to have to do this? What the fark can we do to fix a society that has produced children like this???
 
2013-01-19 12:10:29 PM  
ITT: Guys who would be cool with watching their sisters, daughters, wives, mothers, etc be harassed by a group of drunk men and would tell their sisters, daughters, wives, mothers, etc that if they don't want to be treated that way they should stop dressing like sluts and expecting to get free stuff because of how they look.
 
2013-01-19 12:10:32 PM  
Wow. Just read the first page of comments. It forces you to remember how many of those were written from Mom's basement.
 
2013-01-19 12:10:47 PM  

meat0918: We've come so far, haven't we?


The fact that we can look back and notice that we have come up - to a degree, out of the primordial goo means that we haven't come far enough and we already know how to climb the rest of the way. Men AND women. But we don't. We still think somebody wins and that having a snarky story for our BFFs is more important than honest love and respect. No, women aren't just baby ovens. And guess what, ladies? Men aren't practice mannequins. I got an idea. How about we ALL cut the sh*t and try holding hands at the movies, again?
 
2013-01-19 12:12:10 PM  

One Bad Apple: Tatterdemalian: A female acquaintance of mine wanted me to take her out to a local gay bar. When I asked why, she said, "So you can see what it's like being flirted with by people you don't want to have sex with."

I replied, "How about I *not* go to the gay bar, so I don't give any of the guys the impression that I'm looking for a one night stand."

/she never spoke to me again
//and died at the hands of her abusive boyfriend a year ago

Well you sure showed her didn't you Te'o


We all pretend to be sad when a biatch like that dies. But the worst anyone really feels is inconvenienced. Woman who think they're getting away with it should take note,
 
2013-01-19 12:12:41 PM  

miscreant: WhippingBoy: You're cherry picking comments in order to rationalize your feelings of "outrage".
Why else would you give credence to the opinion of a single anonymous poster on the internet?

She doesn't have to cherry pick comments. There are a shiatload of comments in this thread to find the "misogynistic troglodytes" as you tried to ironically call them. Sad thing is, it's not ironic. And you're one of the worst offenders by far. Glad you gave yourself your own farkie for me.


I'm sorry you feel that way. I realize that my posts are rather bumbling and inarticulate, but I'm sincerely trying to make an honest, valid, and fair point. Could you please give me an example of where you felt I was being a "misogynistic troglodyte"? (This is a sincere request, I'm not trying to be "ironic" or trick you). I'd like to re-examine it, and will certainly agree with you if I think it's warranted.
 
2013-01-19 12:13:44 PM  

THE GREAT NAME: We all pretend to be sad when a biatch like that dies. But the worst anyone really feels is inconvenienced. Woman who think they're getting away with it should take note,


: /

: \

8 |


*click*
 
2013-01-19 12:13:57 PM  

T.M.S.: My perspective changed when I had a daughter. For the first time ever I saw the world from the eyes of a girl. And the view was not pretty. Now I fully support my wife's insistence on single sex education. Boys are animals and belong in cages.


Seconded!
 
2013-01-19 12:15:53 PM  

TheFark5000: Wow. The amount of sexism and "what about the few men this happens to!" in the first page alone already makes me want to vomit. The world is such a mean place to all you fragile, sad, pathetic men of Fark.


That's right. Men have no issues or problems of their own, and should feel ashamed for suggesting that they do. The life of every man is filled with constant wine (I mean "whine" - amirite??) and roses.
 
2013-01-19 12:16:05 PM  

Target Builder: ITT: Guys who would be cool with watching their sisters, daughters, wives, mothers, etc be harassed by a group of drunk men and would tell their sisters, daughters, wives, mothers, etc that if they don't want to be treated that way they should stop dressing like sluts and expecting to get free stuff because of how they look.


I've actually tried this tactic before (though only in broad daylight.) Some dude starts harassing you on street, turn around, look them dead in the eye and say "what would you do if someone was doing this to your mother right now?"

It really shocks them, mostly because they do it in the first place because they expect no response. And I did get a couple of "shut up biatch" comments, but more than one apology. I kinda hope it sticks with some of these guys for next time.
 
2013-01-19 12:16:47 PM  

bunner: One Bad Apple: Well you sure showed her didn't you Te'o

What cheap bag of dogsh*t you left on that guy's porch. Guess you told him.

There's nothing quite as scary as women who need to take the metrics of THEIR sh*tty relationship and start demanding answers from people who aren't in it, regardless of who is on which side of that.

The answer is on the other side of the bed. Not in some random friend guy who you think has some 'splainin to do. And she didn't notice that. And was murdered.

And he lost a friend and all you can do is bite your lip and giggle at your endlessly witty remark. *click*


I only found out what happened to her a little while after I checked out this thread... it reminded me of that conversation, and I looked her name up on Google out of curiosity. I recognized her murderer's name too... he's still in prison, and probably will be for life.

/and any more personal details nobody gets from me
//so FARKers can go ahead and call bullshiat all they like, it actually makes me feel safer knowing they don't know anything about my real life
 
2013-01-19 12:16:54 PM  

clowncar on fire: Pincy: clowncar on fire: ThrobblefootSpectre: Pincy: Well, you were working in a sports bar that I'm guessing probably catered to men, so I'm not exactly surprised you'd get hit on a lot. Now if you are getting the same thing from complete strangers while walking down the street at night that might be a little different.

And is it okay for a guy on the street to get angry (or even start shoving) over a suggestive comment from another guy?

Only if you were trying to find the proper equivalency which- in this case-- would be a female being subject to unwanted comments out on the street by other females.

I don't think guys tend to get as bunched up about unsolicited comments from females as females seem to.

Ya, probably not, since very rarely is a woman going to rape a guy. It's easy for guys to laugh it off or take it as a compliment when the thought of being raped never crosses their mind.

And you actually believe that all unsolicited comments end in rapey rape?


Strawman? Did I say that? Reread what I said. Men never think that there is a possibility of being raped by a woman. For women, it is a possibility. Doesn't mean it is going to happen, but it is a possibility. Depending on the circumstances, that possibility may be very small or much greater. The point is that men don't have to live with that constant fear and thus how we view "attention" from women is different from how women view "attention" from men.

The sooner we men can admit that the better.
 
2013-01-19 12:18:13 PM  
I thought that as a lazy Saturday morning thread, we'd have more a focus on taco's and magic buttons and a lot less straight out misogyny. Guess a lot of frustrated dudes are posting today.
 
2013-01-19 12:18:38 PM  
Settle in, men; misandry is here to stay for a while.

For at least the next several generations there will be some women who want to make up for thousands of years of real (but mostly imagined) male oppression. Most will just be pissed off temporarily, and probably justifiably so, but a few will be sincere, maniacal (sorry, 'womaniacal') outrage queens with political influence.
 
2013-01-19 12:18:49 PM  

quickdraw: cabbyman: [thefamily.com image 360x190]

or this

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 400x400]


I'm 5'5" and would do anything for an extra inch or two.

/Of height, that is.
//Actually, now that I think of it...


No, really though, I think we all (women and men) bear some of the responsibility for the way that parts of society has devolved into basically a living internet comments thread. While no one can be blamed for being harassed or assaulted, it pays to know your surroundings and plan appropriately. It's a shiatty culture we have become, but that's the way the world is. We can lament it, howl at the wind, or blog about it; or we can focus on raising our kids in a way that doesn't perpetuate it. Come to think of it, why can't we do a little of both? I know why, because everything will eventually be derailed by someone saying something horrible, and all the responses thereafter.

I'm focusing on my family, and I'm not going to go out of my way to try to push for some categorical societal shift. I'll do my part by not being a douchebaggerous ogre, you can do me the favor of not throwing those who are in my face and telling me to do something about it.
 
2013-01-19 12:18:54 PM  

AJisaff: yup. statistically, 86% of rape victims are female, and 99% of rapists are male.


Perhaps because women don't get charged with rape in equal situations. Guy's drunk and horny woman starts tugging at his pants? - oh, that's acceptable, not a crime.

Did you see the article yesterday about the teacher attempting rape on an unwilling boy? She got zero (0) days prison, and no sex offender registry. I humbly suggest that sentencing disparity between genders accounts for a large part of that statistic you just mentioned.
 
2013-01-19 12:19:20 PM  
everyone's a victim, these days
 
2013-01-19 12:19:51 PM  

Maestro1701: T.M.S.: My perspective changed when I had a daughter. For the first time ever I saw the world from the eyes of a girl. And the view was not pretty. Now I fully support my wife's insistence on single sex education. Boys are animals and belong in cages.

Seconded!


ok, segregation, but not gender based education, right\? not that "oh geez, maths is hard, so we'll just dumb it down for the girlies" shiat they are trying out in Alabama, right?

/please Gawd... not that...

unfortunately when you daughter leaves the school, and goes out in the real world, how is she going to handle sexually based interraction? our world isn't segregated...
 
2013-01-19 12:20:30 PM  
I have been on Fark for almost 6 years now, and although I don't comment on things, I'm on here daily, reading articles and comments.

After reading the comments in this article, I'm done with this site.

I can't believe I was a (very small) part of this community.

I am disgusted, to the point of being physically sickened, by the majority of comments on this article.

For those of you who still have the stomach to stay and stand up for what's right against these 'people', thank you, but I just can't anymore.
 
2013-01-19 12:20:41 PM  

Pincy: THE GREAT NAME: Pincy: Comedian Ever Mainard sums up this mindset in her excellent bit about the fact that women are constantly aware that "their rape" could happen at any time. She says, "The problem is that every woman has that one moment when you think, here's my rape!

Just asked my wife about this. At just over 40 she's had two of these moments that she can recall. That sucks.

So now a woman doesn't even have to be raped to be a victim of rape? Get real. Things happen that scare us sometimes.

Did I say she was a victim of rape? NO. I said she thought she was going to be raped. One if definitely worse than the other but it still sucks that women have to constantly be on their guard.

As a man, I can honestly say that I have never once thought to myself "I think I'm going to be raped". My guess is the percentage of men who have never had this feeling is much much higher than the percentage of women. To pretend otherwise is ridiculous.


Men have to be constantly on guard about the thread of a false rape accusation. A successful false rape accusation is just as bad as a rape and so the fear is just as legitimate.
 
2013-01-19 12:20:56 PM  

Lernaeus: Settle in, men; misandry is here to stay for a while.

For at least the next several generations there will be some women who want to make up for thousands of years of real (but mostly imagined) male oppression. Most will just be pissed off temporarily, and probably justifiably so, but a few will be sincere, maniacal (sorry, 'womaniacal') outrage queens with political influence.


It sucks to be a man in the world today, doesn't it?
 
2013-01-19 12:21:20 PM  

AJisaff: What kind of upbringing do you have to have to do this? What the fark can we do to fix a society that has produced children like this???


I think that most of it has to do with environment (i.e., parenting). So many people are unfit to be parents, and they are the biggest influence on a child's development. When one or both are not fully engaged, that void is filled somewhere else.
 
2013-01-19 12:21:29 PM  
latimesblogs.latimes.com
This was a just a simple misunderstanding!
 
2013-01-19 12:22:17 PM  

WhippingBoy: TheFark5000: Wow. The amount of sexism and "what about the few men this happens to!" in the first page alone already makes me want to vomit. The world is such a mean place to all you fragile, sad, pathetic men of Fark.

That's right. Men have no issues or problems of their own, and should feel ashamed for suggesting that they do. The life of every man is filled with constant wine (I mean "whine" - amirite??) and roses.


Don't be (pretend to) be stupid. No one is saying guys don't have problems. But you have to wonder why a thread about a woman trying to get men to see things from her point of view devolves into an instant wail-fest about the shiat men have to deal with, as if placing it on a scale will somehow erase the point this woman was making about her own experience.
 
2013-01-19 12:22:34 PM  

Polyhazard: Target Builder: ITT: Guys who would be cool with watching their sisters, daughters, wives, mothers, etc be harassed by a group of drunk men and would tell their sisters, daughters, wives, mothers, etc that if they don't want to be treated that way they should stop dressing like sluts and expecting to get free stuff because of how they look.

I've actually tried this tactic before (though only in broad daylight.) Some dude starts harassing you on street, turn around, look them dead in the eye and say "what would you do if someone was doing this to your mother right now?"

It really shocks them, mostly because they do it in the first place because they expect no response. And I did get a couple of "shut up biatch" comments, but more than one apology. I kinda hope it sticks with some of these guys for next time.


Wow, congrats for standing up. Takes a lot more guts than most people have. I hope it makes a difference, even a small one.
 
2013-01-19 12:22:39 PM  

THE GREAT NAME: Pincy: THE GREAT NAME: Pincy: Comedian Ever Mainard sums up this mindset in her excellent bit about the fact that women are constantly aware that "their rape" could happen at any time. She says, "The problem is that every woman has that one moment when you think, here's my rape!

Just asked my wife about this. At just over 40 she's had two of these moments that she can recall. That sucks.

So now a woman doesn't even have to be raped to be a victim of rape? Get real. Things happen that scare us sometimes.

Did I say she was a victim of rape? NO. I said she thought she was going to be raped. One if definitely worse than the other but it still sucks that women have to constantly be on their guard.

As a man, I can honestly say that I have never once thought to myself "I think I'm going to be raped". My guess is the percentage of men who have never had this feeling is much much higher than the percentage of women. To pretend otherwise is ridiculous.

Men have to be constantly on guard about the thread of a false rape accusation. A successful false rape accusation is just as bad as a rape and so the fear is just as legitimate.


Ya, I know when I'm walking down the street at night I'm constantly on my guard for roving packs of women accusing me of raping them.
 
2013-01-19 12:23:13 PM  

Pincy: Lernaeus: Settle in, men; misandry is here to stay for a while.

For at least the next several generations there will be some women who want to make up for thousands of years of real (but mostly imagined) male oppression. Most will just be pissed off temporarily, and probably justifiably so, but a few will be sincere, maniacal (sorry, 'womaniacal') outrage queens with political influence.

It sucks to be a man in the world today, doesn't it?


Halp, I'm being oppressed!!
 
2013-01-19 12:23:14 PM  

angela_mna: I have been on Fark for almost 6 years now, and although I don't comment on things, I'm on here daily, reading articles and comments.

After reading the comments in this article, I'm done with this site.

I can't believe I was a (very small) part of this community.

I am disgusted, to the point of being physically sickened, by the majority of comments on this article.

For those of you who still have the stomach to stay and stand up for what's right against these 'people', thank you, but I just can't anymore.


And you're going to make this same post in the next dozen threads on this topic, aren't you?
 
2013-01-19 12:23:19 PM  

Polyhazard: WhippingBoy: TheFark5000: Wow. The amount of sexism and "what about the few men this happens to!" in the first page alone already makes me want to vomit. The world is such a mean place to all you fragile, sad, pathetic men of Fark.

That's right. Men have no issues or problems of their own, and should feel ashamed for suggesting that they do. The life of every man is filled with constant wine (I mean "whine" - amirite??) and roses.

Don't be (pretend to) be stupid. No one is saying guys don't have problems. But you have to wonder why a thread about a woman trying to get men to see things from her point of view devolves into an instant wail-fest about the shiat men have to deal with, as if placing it on a scale will somehow erase the point this woman was making about her own experience.


BINGO!
 
2013-01-19 12:24:20 PM  

bunner: meat0918: We've come so far, haven't we?

The fact that we can look back and notice that we have come up - to a degree, out of the primordial goo means that we haven't come far enough and we already know how to climb the rest of the way. Men AND women. But we don't. We still think somebody wins and that having a snarky story for our BFFs is more important than honest love and respect. No, women aren't just baby ovens. And guess what, ladies? Men aren't practice mannequins. I got an idea. How about we ALL cut the sh*t and try holding hands at the movies, again?


Admirable sentiment, but I think you are giving young people too much credit. They're just using trial and error to figure out how to interact with the opposite sex - they don't intelligently consider strategies and choose one. We have castrated all the social structures that would give them rules to follow and strategies to use, so they just do whatever their hindbrains urge them to do, and then see what happens.
 
2013-01-19 12:25:11 PM  

AJisaff: What kind of upbringing do you have to have to do this? What the fark can we do to fix a society that has produced children like this???


Things with no direction only stop when they hit a wall. But, "FOR GOD'S SAKE, NEVER DISCIPLINE OUR CHILDREN OR I WILL HAVE THE LAW ON YOUR ASS AND TAKE YOU FOR EVERYTHING YOU HAVE!" Anybody see a cyclical pattern emerging here. Life has consequences for actions. Sh*t, that not even society, that's physics, ffs. But let's keep omitting that, lest our snowflakes give pause and consider that the sun just might not be shining out of the crack of their ass. Self esteem, you know. Vanity and hubris still stink of something left out of the fridge for too long. And instead of trying to rise above it, we let disingenuous old men turn them into industries. Stop buying every flavor of smoke that's blown up your ass about "what really matters" and for god's sake, don't sell the same smoke to your kids.
 
2013-01-19 12:25:24 PM  

TheFark5000: Wow. The amount of sexism and "what about the few men this happens to!" in the first page alone already makes me want to vomit. The world is such a mean place to all you fragile, sad, pathetic men of Fark.


If somebody raped you, I would not shed a tear.
 
2013-01-19 12:25:42 PM  

AJisaff: you know what's really sickening? that this is in Canada. and the Canadian "rape culture" is a tiny fraction of what it is in the States. I can only imagine what it is like for women in the States


Insane paranoia isn't fun anywhere
 
2013-01-19 12:26:25 PM  

daveUSMC: I'm 5'5" and would do anything for an extra inch or two.


The day that science comes up with a pill or surgery (that doesn't leave you crippled for months) to increase a man's height is the day that a whoooole bunch of guys stop talking shiat about cosmetic procedures. It'd be the male boob job, nearly ubiquitous and frequently taken to the extreme, with easily visible results that get the patient tons of attention and self esteem.
 
2013-01-19 12:26:52 PM  

angela_mna: I have been on Fark for almost 6 years now, and although I don't comment on things, I'm on here daily, reading articles and comments.

After reading the comments in this article, I'm done with this site.

I can't believe I was a (very small) part of this community.

I am disgusted, to the point of being physically sickened, by the majority of comments on this article.

For those of you who still have the stomach to stay and stand up for what's right against these 'people', thank you, but I just can't anymore.


Well, bye.
 
2013-01-19 12:27:10 PM  

THE GREAT NAME: TheFark5000: Wow. The amount of sexism and "what about the few men this happens to!" in the first page alone already makes me want to vomit. The world is such a mean place to all you fragile, sad, pathetic men of Fark.

If somebody raped you, I would not shed a tear.


You don't say? That sentiment goes against everything else you've posted in this thread. I don't know how I read you so wrong.
 
2013-01-19 12:27:30 PM  

Polyhazard: WhippingBoy: TheFark5000: Wow. The amount of sexism and "what about the few men this happens to!" in the first page alone already makes me want to vomit. The world is such a mean place to all you fragile, sad, pathetic men of Fark.

That's right. Men have no issues or problems of their own, and should feel ashamed for suggesting that they do. The life of every man is filled with constant wine (I mean "whine" - amirite??) and roses.

Don't be (pretend to) be stupid. No one is saying guys don't have problems. But you have to wonder why a thread about a woman trying to get men to see things from her point of view devolves into an instant wail-fest about the shiat men have to deal with, as if placing it on a scale will somehow erase the point this woman was making about her own experience.


Speaking strictly for myself, I was sincerely trying to offer a counterpoint by trying to get people to see things from my (a man's) point of view.
 
2013-01-19 12:29:00 PM  

AJisaff: Pincy: clowncar on fire: ThrobblefootSpectre: Pincy: Well, you were working in a sports bar that I'm guessing probably catered to men, so I'm not exactly surprised you'd get hit on a lot. Now if you are getting the same thing from complete strangers while walking down the street at night that might be a little different.

And is it okay for a guy on the street to get angry (or even start shoving) over a suggestive comment from another guy?

Only if you were trying to find the proper equivalency which- in this case-- would be a female being subject to unwanted comments out on the street by other females.

I don't think guys tend to get as bunched up about unsolicited comments from females as females seem to.

Ya, probably not, since very rarely is a woman going to rape a guy. It's easy for guys to laugh it off or take it as a compliment when the thought of being raped never crosses their mind.

yup. statistically, 86% of rape victims are female, and 99% of rapists are male.

Recently, a 15 year old girl with 5 other teenage and early adult males were charged with rape in Prince George, BC. they lured two young teenage boys into an apartment, beat the shiat out of them and raped them.

What kind of upbringing do you have to have to do this? What the fark can we do to fix a society that has produced children like this???


So, when a women commits a rape, it's suddenly the fault of her upbringing? Do women not have to accept responsibility for the bad things they do? Are you saying women are too pathetic for responsibility?
 
2013-01-19 12:29:51 PM  

Occam's Disposable Razor: daveUSMC: I'm 5'5" and would do anything for an extra inch or two.

The day that science comes up with a pill or surgery (that doesn't leave you crippled for months) to increase a man's height is the day that a whoooole bunch of guys stop talking shiat about cosmetic procedures. It'd be the male boob job, nearly ubiquitous and frequently taken to the extreme, with easily visible results that get the patient tons of attention and self esteem.


Don't they already do this in Japan and South Korea, where you can actually be denied a job for your height? Thought I read something awful about shin-breaking surgery that would give you a couple inches. *shudder*
 
2013-01-19 12:30:40 PM  

angela_mna: I have been on Fark for almost 6 years now, and although I don't comment on things, I'm on here daily, reading articles and comments.

After reading the comments in this article, I'm done with this site.

I can't believe I was a (very small) part of this community.

I am disgusted, to the point of being physically sickened, by the majority of comments on this article.

For those of you who still have the stomach to stay and stand up for what's right against these 'people', thank you, but I just can't anymore.


Forgive my obvious ignorance, but what exactly was so incredibly objectionable? I can understand feeling frustrated, but I don't see what makes this thread so different from any other Fark threads on similar subjects.
 
2013-01-19 12:31:06 PM  
img685.imageshack.us

Jesus farking christ I am SO TIRED of women complaining all the time about everything. If you're an attractive woman you are like a celebrity, and celebrities have to deal with getting harassed in public. Period. On the other hand, you are also A FARKING CELEBRITY, which has a plethora of perks.

This is how life goes, there are upsides and downsides to everything. Incessantly complaining about the negative aspects, especially while ignoring the positives, just makes you look like a whiny, spoiled, and naive 12 year old. Grow the fark up.

/life is hard
//welcome to the real world
///rich white people problems ftl
 
2013-01-19 12:31:27 PM  

Polyhazard: Occam's Disposable Razor: daveUSMC: I'm 5'5" and would do anything for an extra inch or two.

The day that science comes up with a pill or surgery (that doesn't leave you crippled for months) to increase a man's height is the day that a whoooole bunch of guys stop talking shiat about cosmetic procedures. It'd be the male boob job, nearly ubiquitous and frequently taken to the extreme, with easily visible results that get the patient tons of attention and self esteem.

Don't they already do this in Japan and South Korea, where you can actually be denied a job for your height? Thought I read something awful about shin-breaking surgery that would give you a couple inches. *shudder*


Some dwarves go through a whole weird, torturous regimen of having their legs broken and rebroken in order to be stretched.
 
2013-01-19 12:32:08 PM  

Pincy: Comedian Ever Mainard sums up this mindset in her excellent bit about the fact that women are constantly aware that "their rape" could happen at any time. She says, "The problem is that every woman has that one moment when you think, here's my rape!

Just asked my wife about this. At just over 40 she's had two of these moments that she can recall. That sucks.


Thanks, was just about to give up on this thread.

Guys, she can't read your mind. She doesn't know what you want. "she should take it as a compliment" is *your* interpretation based on your context; maybe she agrees, maybe not. It's not about boy/girl, it's basic empathy and interpersonal skills.
 
2013-01-19 12:32:57 PM  

noitsnot: Admirable sentiment, but I think you are giving young people too much credit.


I give the more base aspects of the way people behave not a whit of credit, but if they can read and see the freely available map of every grand and every stupid idea - and their rewards and consequences - laid out in the vast and mind panorama of history, and do not invest the time, I not only do not give them credit, I'm pretty sure their cash isn't worth much, either.
 
2013-01-19 12:33:41 PM  

bunner: All property is theft, all sex is rape, all commerce is oppression. And other overwrought and painstakingly delineated college theses that stack up to f*ck all in the real world. Did we really come up with brave and empowering new world when we decided that being ladies and gentlemen was "old hat". That old hat was a pretty useful ledge in our climb out of the social primordial goo, y'all. And so far, we haven't exactly been farting rainbows on each other by declaring it irrelevant.


I would agree with the civility that being "ladies and gentlemen" implies. What I don't agree with is the monetary aspect of that relationship. When women can't own property, or earn a decent wage, or invest or do any of the other aspects of society that allows her to eat or have a home with out a husband, then "the civility" of our previous mores creates all sorts of social implications that are harmful to our species.

We will figure out how to handle this in time. It's just that such a change on such a massive scale takes time.
 
2013-01-19 12:33:55 PM  

WhippingBoy: Polyhazard: WhippingBoy: TheFark5000: Wow. The amount of sexism and "what about the few men this happens to!" in the first page alone already makes me want to vomit. The world is such a mean place to all you fragile, sad, pathetic men of Fark.

That's right. Men have no issues or problems of their own, and should feel ashamed for suggesting that they do. The life of every man is filled with constant wine (I mean "whine" - amirite??) and roses.

Don't be (pretend to) be stupid. No one is saying guys don't have problems. But you have to wonder why a thread about a woman trying to get men to see things from her point of view devolves into an instant wail-fest about the shiat men have to deal with, as if placing it on a scale will somehow erase the point this woman was making about her own experience.

Speaking strictly for myself, I was sincerely trying to offer a counterpoint by trying to get people to see things from my (a man's) point of view.


And what, exactly, was your counterpoint? Because I missed it. All I see you saying is "guys have been groped." How is that a counterpoint?
 
2013-01-19 12:34:32 PM  
I see Fark wasted absolutely zero time in blaming the author for being harassed. Yeah, you all really can fark off and EABOD.

/I wonder what your wives would say
//oh wait...
 
2013-01-19 12:35:01 PM  

Polyhazard: WhippingBoy: TheFark5000: Wow. The amount of sexism and "what about the few men this happens to!" in the first page alone already makes me want to vomit. The world is such a mean place to all you fragile, sad, pathetic men of Fark.

That's right. Men have no issues or problems of their own, and should feel ashamed for suggesting that they do. The life of every man is filled with constant wine (I mean "whine" - amirite??) and roses.

Don't be (pretend to) be stupid. No one is saying guys don't have problems. But you have to wonder why a thread about a woman trying to get men to see things from her point of view devolves into an instant wail-fest about the shiat men have to deal with, as if placing it on a scale will somehow erase the point this woman was making about her own experience.


Well, it's not like rationally pointing out that filtering out "losers" who fail their tests, which can only be passed by having psychic and/or precognitive superpowers, has convinced anyone that they're really selecting for men who will lie to them, and probably go on to lie to them about remaining faithful while they bang all the other women running up to get a piece of the man that some other woman thought was relationship material.

/drama and misogyny is what people want, not reason
//anonymous, and FARK, delivers
 
2013-01-19 12:35:07 PM  

Polyhazard: Target Builder: ITT: Guys who would be cool with watching their sisters, daughters, wives, mothers, etc be harassed by a group of drunk men and would tell their sisters, daughters, wives, mothers, etc that if they don't want to be treated that way they should stop dressing like sluts and expecting to get free stuff because of how they look.

I've actually tried this tactic before (though only in broad daylight.) Some dude starts harassing you on street, turn around, look them dead in the eye and say "what would you do if someone was doing this to your mother right now?"

It really shocks them, mostly because they do it in the first place because they expect no response. And I did get a couple of "shut up biatch" comments, but more than one apology. I kinda hope it sticks with some of these guys for next time.



And the one time you piss off some psycho with mommy issues, who interprets confrontation and eye contact viscerally in the lower brain as a dog might, since he's already acting based on his more primitive instincts and hormones, you're going to be in deep shiat if you're not ready to defend yourself.

My wife is a lot like you, and she's highly trained in self-defense. But I know that's not a guarantee, or a license to go around snapping "you got a problem?!" at strangers whose gazes linger a bit longer than is comfortable. She doesn't do that as much as she did in her 20s, which is when women really seem to get fed up with it and start looking to complain about it or challenge it.

What's wrong with ignoring it and getting out of there? Men have to make this decision all the time, too. If a guy whips around to some group of guys calling him a "fa%%ot" or something, and tries to "teach them a lesson" by "shocking" them with some verbal challenge (however rational), he KNOWS he'd better be prepared to be in a fight and maybe get knifed or shot. Especially if you pull this shiat in the city streets, where it's most likely to happen.

I hope women understand this is how it works for men, and some men don't care that you're female and will treat you like men treat each other, meaning they will try to beat the shiat out of you. Many young women get their boyfriends into fights because they lip off to assholes who are verbally broadcasting their need for cheap thrills of some sort, and the females don't understand that the vast majority of the time the men will go after the men in the other group, because that's how it is in nature and because they perceive the male to be the bigger threat that must be dealt with first ("control your biatch" mentality).

In other words, be careful because your tactic may backfire one day. If you want equality on the streets, you may get it. I hope you're a badass, and I hope they're not armed.
 
2013-01-19 12:35:08 PM  

The My Little Pony Killer: I see Fark wasted absolutely zero time in blaming the author for being harassed. Yeah, you all really can fark off and EABOD.

/I wonder what your wives would say
//oh wait...


Where did that occur?
 
2013-01-19 12:35:19 PM  

Polyhazard: Target Builder: ITT: Guys who would be cool with watching their sisters, daughters, wives, mothers, etc be harassed by a group of drunk men and would tell their sisters, daughters, wives, mothers, etc that if they don't want to be treated that way they should stop dressing like sluts and expecting to get free stuff because of how they look.

I've actually tried this tactic before (though only in broad daylight.) Some dude starts harassing you on street, turn around, look them dead in the eye and say "what would you do if someone was doing this to your mother right now?"

It really shocks them, mostly because they do it in the first place because they expect no response. And I did get a couple of "shut up biatch" comments, but more than one apology. I kinda hope it sticks with some of these guys for next time.


That's a good idea. By the same logic, next time some biatch gets ranty, gobby and pushy with NAME, I'll go and do the exact same thing to her mother. HA! See how she likes THAT!
 
2013-01-19 12:37:23 PM  

THE GREAT NAME: A successful false rape accusation is just as bad as a rape and so the fear is just as legitimate.


Hahahaha no. Try again, with a little less butthurt this time.
 
2013-01-19 12:37:26 PM  

THE GREAT NAME: AJisaff: Pincy: clowncar on fire: ThrobblefootSpectre: Pincy: Well, you were working in a sports bar that I'm guessing probably catered to men, so I'm not exactly surprised you'd get hit on a lot. Now if you are getting the same thing from complete strangers while walking down the street at night that might be a little different.

And is it okay for a guy on the street to get angry (or even start shoving) over a suggestive comment from another guy?

Only if you were trying to find the proper equivalency which- in this case-- would be a female being subject to unwanted comments out on the street by other females.

I don't think guys tend to get as bunched up about unsolicited comments from females as females seem to.

Ya, probably not, since very rarely is a woman going to rape a guy. It's easy for guys to laugh it off or take it as a compliment when the thought of being raped never crosses their mind.

yup. statistically, 86% of rape victims are female, and 99% of rapists are male.

Recently, a 15 year old girl with 5 other teenage and early adult males were charged with rape in Prince George, BC. they lured two young teenage boys into an apartment, beat the shiat out of them and raped them.

What kind of upbringing do you have to have to do this? What the fark can we do to fix a society that has produced children like this???

So, when a women commits a rape, it's suddenly the fault of her upbringing? Do women not have to accept responsibility for the bad things they do? Are you saying women are too pathetic for responsibility?


no, my comment is about the fact that all of the people involved in this case are CHILDREN. you must have missed my post about believing that women convicted of rape should get the exact same punishment as men. but thanks for trolling.
 
2013-01-19 12:38:22 PM  

lordjupiter: Polyhazard: Target Builder: ITT: Guys who would be cool with watching their sisters, daughters, wives, mothers, etc be harassed by a group of drunk men and would tell their sisters, daughters, wives, mothers, etc that if they don't want to be treated that way they should stop dressing like sluts and expecting to get free stuff because of how they look.

I've actually tried this tactic before (though only in broad daylight.) Some dude starts harassing you on street, turn around, look them dead in the eye and say "what would you do if someone was doing this to your mother right now?"

It really shocks them, mostly because they do it in the first place because they expect no response. And I did get a couple of "shut up biatch" comments, but more than one apology. I kinda hope it sticks with some of these guys for next time.


And the one time you piss off some psycho with mommy issues, who interprets confrontation and eye contact viscerally in the lower brain as a dog might, since he's already acting based on his more primitive instincts and hormones, you're going to be in deep shiat if you're not ready to defend yourself.

My wife is a lot like you, and she's highly trained in self-defense. But I know that's not a guarantee, or a license to go around snapping "you got a problem?!" at strangers whose gazes linger a bit longer than is comfortable. She doesn't do that as much as she did in her 20s, which is when women really seem to get fed up with it and start looking to complain about it or challenge it.

What's wrong with ignoring it and getting out of there? Men have to make this decision all the time, too. If a guy whips around to some group of guys calling him a "fa%%ot" or something, and tries to "teach them a lesson" by "shocking" them with some verbal challenge (however rational), he KNOWS he'd better be prepared to be in a fight and maybe get knifed or shot. Especially if you pull this shiat in the city streets, where it's most likely to happen.

I hope wo ...


I think the bigger point here is that it's not up to women to teach men how to behave, it's up to men.
 
2013-01-19 12:38:27 PM  

lordjupiter: This is kind of half-baked in that it seems to be trying to divide "sexual harassment" into two terms that can be reduced to something other than what the actual term means. If men are just after sex via power and not the other way around, then they are NOT treating women in the workplace the same as men, as the author contends.

Maybe cracking jokes in the presence of women and treating them like "one of the guys" is indeed an attempt at "equality", but that doesn't lead to the conclusion that "men sexually harass women because they are not sexist". That's absurd.


The sex by means of power has nothing to do with similar treatment in the work environment. Separate cases, just reread it. Sex by means of power probably hasn't got anything to do with workplace either, that is just coincidental because that is where the power is.

But the part where we are talking about a hostile work environment is probably spot on. It just goes further than just jokes. It goes on to mocking ideas, crude remarks, commenting on physical attributes etc. Just try it for yourself, after you see a male colleague placating the boss you tell him he still has a white stain near his mouth. See what happens. Now try it with a female colleague. Or when you see a male colleague walking about all high and mighty you tell him that he should hit the gym if he is trying to be impress anyone. no try that with a woman.

I have done that a lot with male colleagues. We get a laugh and we know that turn about is fair play. I have never done that with female colleagues. I have seen people getting written up for things that would get waved away if it was between two men instead of a man and a woman.
 
2013-01-19 12:38:34 PM  

Lernaeus: Settle in, men; misandry is here to stay for a while.

For at least the next several generations there will be some women who want to make up for thousands of years of real (but mostly imagined) male oppression. Most will just be pissed off temporarily, and probably justifiably so, but a few will be sincere, maniacal (sorry, 'womaniacal') outrage queens with political influence.


Rubbish. Those women aren't punishing men for what men did in the past. They're punishing men because they are ugly, right now.
 
2013-01-19 12:38:49 PM  

Tatterdemalian: Polyhazard: WhippingBoy: TheFark5000: Wow. The amount of sexism and "what about the few men this happens to!" in the first page alone already makes me want to vomit. The world is such a mean place to all you fragile, sad, pathetic men of Fark.

That's right. Men have no issues or problems of their own, and should feel ashamed for suggesting that they do. The life of every man is filled with constant wine (I mean "whine" - amirite??) and roses.

Don't be (pretend to) be stupid. No one is saying guys don't have problems. But you have to wonder why a thread about a woman trying to get men to see things from her point of view devolves into an instant wail-fest about the shiat men have to deal with, as if placing it on a scale will somehow erase the point this woman was making about her own experience.

Well, it's not like rationally pointing out that filtering out "losers" who fail their tests, which can only be passed by having psychic and/or precognitive superpowers, has convinced anyone that they're really selecting for men who will lie to them, and probably go on to lie to them about remaining faithful while they bang all the other women running up to get a piece of the man that some other woman thought was relationship material.

/drama and misogyny is what people want, not reason
//anonymous, and FARK, delivers


assets.diylol.com
 
2013-01-19 12:38:50 PM  

Polyhazard: WhippingBoy: TheFark5000: Wow. The amount of sexism and "what about the few men this happens to!" in the first page alone already makes me want to vomit. The world is such a mean place to all you fragile, sad, pathetic men of Fark.

That's right. Men have no issues or problems of their own, and should feel ashamed for suggesting that they do. The life of every man is filled with constant wine (I mean "whine" - amirite??) and roses.

Don't be (pretend to) be stupid. No one is saying guys don't have problems. But you have to wonder why a thread about a woman trying to get men to see things from her point of view devolves into an instant wail-fest about the shiat men have to deal with, as if placing it on a scale will somehow erase the point this woman was making about her own experience.


There's a dual-reason for the wailing.

To some extent, there really are posts where it feels like all men are being accused of, if not *performing* this behavior, at least not always being around to condemn it (because no one else around stepped in). Some feel like they're being expected to put on sackcloth's or hair shirts and wail about how evil they have been. Whether this perception is accurate or not can vary, but with some comments in the vein of "And the view was not pretty. Now I fully support my wife's insistence on single sex education. Boys are animals and belong in cages.", one can imagine how other men might get defensive.

And some feel frustrated that they feel like their concerns are, well, being called 'not important'. Not 'less important', or 'less numerous', but, as in, they shouldn't care at all. Like how females *don't* really get prosecuted for rape, or statutory rape... even in a situation where there's likely to be power abuse (teacher-on-student). That is, apparently, far less horrifying than male-on-female student... I guess because of our culture. But to some, it really feels like their concerns are, quite frankly, being *dismissed* entirely. That's frustrating as fark.

So some of it may just be sheer communication breakdown. When someone says "No, I'm not condemning all men!", but then says "Men can get away with X, men do X, etc etc.", it sends mixed messages, and makes the former statement feel... hollow? Even if the speaker doesn't MEAN 'all men', that's how it sometimes gets internalized by men listening/reading to it. And that can bring out the defensiveness in people, even, or perhaps ESPECIALLY, if they have not engaged in behavior X.

Some of the people complaining? Yeah, they probably are misogynists. But to assume all are, or to coyly imply that all are secretly just pissed they can't be misogynists, or some such, is, well, wrong, I would think. Maybe they're just being oversensitive, maybe there's a communication breakdown, but to sort of imply "Well you're a SEXIST if you bring these things up!" is just gonna fark stuff up further.

And if you wish to ask "Well where did I imply it?", this sentence

"But you have to wonder why a thread about a woman trying to get men to see things from her point of view devolves into an instant wail-fest about the shiat men have to deal with, as if placing it on a scale will somehow erase the point this woman was making about her own experience"

sort of implies that *ALL* those going bringing up issues are, in fact, secretly sexist or horrible people or some such. (At least, that's how it appears on this end of the screen.)
"
 
2013-01-19 12:39:14 PM  

THE GREAT NAME: TheFark5000: Wow. The amount of sexism and "what about the few men this happens to!" in the first page alone already makes me want to vomit. The world is such a mean place to all you fragile, sad, pathetic men of Fark.

If somebody raped you, I would not shed a tear.


And yet if somebody were to accuse you of rape, you would want the whole world to cry with you.
 
2013-01-19 12:39:30 PM  
There must be some real doozies in this thread- my ignore filter has blocked out almost half the comments. Am I missing anything?
 
2013-01-19 12:41:18 PM  

The My Little Pony Killer: THE GREAT NAME: A successful false rape accusation is just as bad as a rape and so the fear is just as legitimate.

Hahahaha no. Try again, with a little less butthurt this time.


That is a thoughtful response, and one that is sure to mark you as the thinker in the thread.

rolls eyes
 
2013-01-19 12:41:31 PM  

Pincy: THE GREAT NAME: Pincy: THE GREAT NAME: Pincy: Comedian Ever Mainard sums up this mindset in her excellent bit about the fact that women are constantly aware that "their rape" could happen at any time. She says, "The problem is that every woman has that one moment when you think, here's my rape!

Just asked my wife about this. At just over 40 she's had two of these moments that she can recall. That sucks.

So now a woman doesn't even have to be raped to be a victim of rape? Get real. Things happen that scare us sometimes.

Did I say she was a victim of rape? NO. I said she thought she was going to be raped. One if definitely worse than the other but it still sucks that women have to constantly be on their guard.

As a man, I can honestly say that I have never once thought to myself "I think I'm going to be raped". My guess is the percentage of men who have never had this feeling is much much higher than the percentage of women. To pretend otherwise is ridiculous.

Men have to be constantly on guard about the thread of a false rape accusation. A successful false rape accusation is just as bad as a rape and so the fear is just as legitimate.

Ya, I know when I'm walking down the street at night I'm constantly on my guard for roving packs of women accusing me of raping them.


False rape claims are real. 83% of rape claims are made up. Get your head out of the sand.
 
2013-01-19 12:41:32 PM  

lordjupiter: What's wrong with ignoring it and getting out of there?


It leaves the jackass to do it to other women.
 
2013-01-19 12:42:07 PM  
There is a serious lack of "what she may have been wearing" and what "asking for it" might look like photos.

I am disappoint.
 
2013-01-19 12:42:46 PM  

WhippingBoy: The My Little Pony Killer: I see Fark wasted absolutely zero time in blaming the author for being harassed. Yeah, you all really can fark off and EABOD.

/I wonder what your wives would say
//oh wait...

Where did that occur?


Did you skip over the entire front page? How about any number of comments blaming her for being attractive and/or a celebrity, so that just "comes with the territory?"

Or are you just being willfully ignorant?
 
2013-01-19 12:42:56 PM  

Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: There must be some real doozies in this thread- my ignore filter has blocked out almost half the comments. Am I missing anything?


Ever been to a Men's Rights Activist web page?
 
2013-01-19 12:43:10 PM  

lordjupiter: My wife is a lot like you, and she's highly trained in self-defense. But I know that's not a guarantee, or a license to go around snapping "you got a problem?!" at strangers whose gazes linger a bit longer than is comfortable. She doesn't do that as much as she did in her 20s, which is when women really seem to get fed up with it and start looking to complain about it or challenge it...


Thanks for the advice, I guess... but could you please give it without being disingenuous and minimizing the problem women are complaining about here? Don't you think that's a bit insulting?
 
2013-01-19 12:44:05 PM  

Pincy: THE GREAT NAME: TheFark5000: Wow. The amount of sexism and "what about the few men this happens to!" in the first page alone already makes me want to vomit. The world is such a mean place to all you fragile, sad, pathetic men of Fark.

If somebody raped you, I would not shed a tear.

You don't say? That sentiment goes against everything else you've posted in this thread. I don't know how I read you so wrong.


Yeah, and you support false rape accusations. And your wife boils bunnies.
 
2013-01-19 12:44:34 PM  

Polyhazard: And what, exactly, was your counterpoint? Because I missed it. All I see you saying is "guys have been groped." How is that a counterpoint?


Perspective. As a man, getting groped is no big deal to me. So if I hear an anecdote about a woman getting groped, my own experiences and feelings say "no big deal" and, on an emotional level, I don't see what all the fuss is about. I don't think this makes me a bad person (at least I hope it doesn't).

There seems to be a lot of anger because "I just don't get it". Well... you're right; I don't get it. I've never been a woman, and while I can cognitively understand the fear and frustration that being groped might cause, it just doesn't hit me on an emotional level, because these are emotions that I've never had to deal with.

On the other hand, people have no problem telling me how wonderful and problem free my life must be because I'm a man, even though they themselves have absolutely no clue what being a man is like. To top it off, I'm supposed to feel ashamed if I even mention that I have problems and issues of my own to deal with.

I apologize if my comments have offended anyone; my intent was sincere (but perhaps misguided); I'm just trying to keep things honest...
 
2013-01-19 12:44:43 PM  

Zombie Butler: I would agree with the civility that being "ladies and gentlemen" implies. What I don't agree with is the monetary aspect of that relationship. When women can't own property, or earn a decent wage, or invest or do any of the other aspects of society that allows her to eat or have a home with out a husband, then "the civility" of our previous mores creates all sorts of social implications that are harmful to our species.


That IS the party line, but a glimpse history at will show that, overall, many women in different circumstances did quite well alone, opened businesses, owned properties, amassed wealth and provided employment. Mostly the same way men did. Finding an opportunity and busting their ass, being born with it or having a great blessing bestowed upon them. In the humdrum lives of the regular Blokes and Bettys, that was a bit more accurate but it's a false equivalency to assign decent behavior with drudgery and disenfranchisement. You don't have to be a complete f*ckstick to do well with money. And almost ALL marriages, regardless of who is the more dominant partner, manage to decide financial matters on their own. Sometimes to no great evident wisdom or useful result. But saying "If you have a uterus, you couldn't afford to be a pleasant person or you'd have nothing" is a tidy bit of kool aid leftover from days of feminism as a reading comprehension disorder days when misandry got it's first nice hat and went to town.
 
2013-01-19 12:47:09 PM  

Felgraf: Polyhazard: WhippingBoy: TheFark5000: Wow. The amount of sexism and "what about the few men this happens to!" in the first page alone already makes me want to vomit. The world is such a mean place to all you fragile, sad, pathetic men of Fark.

That's right. Men have no issues or problems of their own, and should feel ashamed for suggesting that they do. The life of every man is filled with constant wine (I mean "whine" - amirite??) and roses.

Don't be (pretend to) be stupid. No one is saying guys don't have problems. But you have to wonder why a thread about a woman trying to get men to see things from her point of view devolves into an instant wail-fest about the shiat men have to deal with, as if placing it on a scale will somehow erase the point this woman was making about her own experience.

There's a dual-reason for the wailing.

To some extent, there really are posts where it feels like all men are being accused of, if not *performing* this behavior, at least not always being around to condemn it (because no one else around stepped in). Some feel like they're being expected to put on sackcloth's or hair shirts and wail about how evil they have been. Whether this perception is accurate or not can vary, but with some comments in the vein of "And the view was not pretty. Now I fully support my wife's insistence on single sex education. Boys are animals and belong in cages.", one can imagine how other men might get defensive.

And some feel frustrated that they feel like their concerns are, well, being called 'not important'. Not 'less important', or 'less numerous', but, as in, they shouldn't care at all. Like how females *don't* really get prosecuted for rape, or statutory rape... even in a situation where there's likely to be power abuse (teacher-on-student). That is, apparently, far less horrifying than male-on-female student... I guess because of our culture. But to some, it really feels like their concerns are, quite frankly, being *dismissed* entirely. ...


What he said.
 
2013-01-19 12:47:22 PM  

Polyhazard: [assets.diylol.com image 510x381]


Just call it misogynist, and put me on ignore. It's easier than thinking, and less likely to lead to dissent.

/if I can't be a member of the Inner Party, I'd rather be a prole than an Outer Party member
//only proles and animals are free
 
2013-01-19 12:47:58 PM  

Pincy: Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: There must be some real doozies in this thread- my ignore filter has blocked out almost half the comments. Am I missing anything?

Ever been to a Men's Rights Activist web page?


Can't say that I have. Well, carry on then.
 
2013-01-19 12:48:24 PM  

The My Little Pony Killer: WhippingBoy: The My Little Pony Killer: I see Fark wasted absolutely zero time in blaming the author for being harassed. Yeah, you all really can fark off and EABOD.

/I wonder what your wives would say
//oh wait...

Where did that occur?

Did you skip over the entire front page? How about any number of comments blaming her for being attractive and/or a celebrity, so that just "comes with the territory?"

Or are you just being willfully ignorant?


While those comments do exist, I don't feel that they reflect the general tone of the thread.
 
2013-01-19 12:48:38 PM  
Fark readership is a bunch of assholes. This should come as no surprise to anybody.

Good article.
 
2013-01-19 12:48:55 PM  

toomuchmarisa: [img685.imageshack.us image 300x391]

Jesus farking christ I am SO TIRED of women complaining all the time about everything. If you're an attractive woman you are like a celebrity, and celebrities have to deal with getting harassed in public. Period. On the other hand, you are also A FARKING CELEBRITY, which has a plethora of perks.

This is how life goes, there are upsides and downsides to everything. Incessantly complaining about the negative aspects, especially while ignoring the positives, just makes you look like a whiny, spoiled, and naive 12 year old. Grow the fark up.

/life is hard
//welcome to the real world
///rich white people problems ftl


Feminists like Pincy ensure women have no challenges in life, and hence no reason to grow up. At least until it is too late. Feminism's gift to women is a poisoned chalice.
 
2013-01-19 12:48:56 PM  

WhippingBoy: Polyhazard: And what, exactly, was your counterpoint? Because I missed it. All I see you saying is "guys have been groped." How is that a counterpoint?

Perspective. As a man, getting groped is no big deal to me. So if I hear an anecdote about a woman getting groped, my own experiences and feelings say "no big deal" and, on an emotional level, I don't see what all the fuss is about. I don't think this makes me a bad person (at least I hope it doesn't).

There seems to be a lot of anger because "I just don't get it". Well... you're right; I don't get it. I've never been a woman, and while I can cognitively understand the fear and frustration that being groped might cause, it just doesn't hit me on an emotional level, because these are emotions that I've never had to deal with.

On the other hand, people have no problem telling me how wonderful and problem free my life must be because I'm a man, even though they themselves have absolutely no clue what being a man is like. To top it off, I'm supposed to feel ashamed if I even mention that I have problems and issues of my own to deal with.

I apologize if my comments have offended anyone; my intent was sincere (but perhaps misguided); I'm just trying to keep things honest...


OK, it sounds like you are being honest here, so don't take these questions the wrong way because I'm not trying to accuse you of anything.

Are you constantly being groped by other men or is this just a once in a blue moon thing?

Have you ever thought to yourself "that man is going to rape me?"
 
2013-01-19 12:50:02 PM  

Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: There must be some real doozies in this thread- my ignore filter has blocked out almost half the comments. Am I missing anything?


Assuming I'm not already on your ignore list, if this thread is that objectionable that you've got half the comments blocked out, why wouldn't you just leave instead of wasting your time posting?
 
2013-01-19 12:50:10 PM  

The My Little Pony Killer: lordjupiter: What's wrong with ignoring it and getting out of there?

It leaves the jackass to do it to other women.


I hope you read more than just that one sentence.
 
2013-01-19 12:50:16 PM  

The My Little Pony Killer: THE GREAT NAME: A successful false rape accusation is just as bad as a rape and so the fear is just as legitimate.

Hahahaha no. Try again, with a little less butthurt this time.


Actually, it sort of is. If a woman accuses you of rape and you didn't commit any rape, your life - even if exonerated - in that community is OVER. Punkt. Fullstop. Period. Of course, if it's not false and you did rape the woman, I hope they find you in a ditch, but, um, false rape accusations DO exist and they are levied by the sort of women who see sex as a weapon, and would likely be the sort of vermin the woman in TFA complained about if they WERE men.
 
2013-01-19 12:51:03 PM  

Tatterdemalian: Polyhazard: [assets.diylol.com image 510x381]

Just call it misogynist, and put me on ignore. It's easier than thinking, and less likely to lead to dissent.

/if I can't be a member of the Inner Party, I'd rather be a prole than an Outer Party member
//only proles and animals are free


Dude, I'm all ears... er... eyes... I just have no idea WTH you are saying. Perhaps you could try running a different script.

/no ignore list
 
2013-01-19 12:51:10 PM  

howdoibegin: Fark readership is a bunch of assholes. This should come as no surprise to anybody.


Don't be so hard on yourself. See how that works?
 
2013-01-19 12:51:42 PM  

GRCooper: Pincy: Comedian Ever Mainard sums up this mindset in her excellent bit about the fact that women are constantly aware that "their rape" could happen at any time. She says, "The problem is that every woman has that one moment when you think, here's my rape!

Just asked my wife about this. At just over 40 she's had two of these moments that she can recall. That sucks.

Thanks, was just about to give up on this thread.

Guys, she can't read your mind. She doesn't know what you want. "she should take it as a compliment" is *your* interpretation based on your context; maybe she agrees, maybe not. It's not about boy/girl, it's basic empathy and interpersonal skills.


You can't just say that the recipient of a comment can interpret it however they want. Otherwise people could take every single thing they hear as offensive and/or a subtle threat of rape.

Come to think of it I know somebody who does that. Not what I would call the happiest woman I have met. Hopefully she'll suicide soon.
 
2013-01-19 12:52:27 PM  

THE GREAT NAME: toomuchmarisa: [img685.imageshack.us image 300x391]

Jesus farking christ I am SO TIRED of women complaining all the time about everything. If you're an attractive woman you are like a celebrity, and celebrities have to deal with getting harassed in public. Period. On the other hand, you are also A FARKING CELEBRITY, which has a plethora of perks.

This is how life goes, there are upsides and downsides to everything. Incessantly complaining about the negative aspects, especially while ignoring the positives, just makes you look like a whiny, spoiled, and naive 12 year old. Grow the fark up.

/life is hard
//welcome to the real world
///rich white people problems ftl

Feminists like Pincy ensure women have no challenges in life, and hence no reason to grow up. At least until it is too late. Feminism's gift to women is a poisoned chalice.


I take it you are implying that being called a feminist is a bad thing?

And yes, in a perfect world, I don't think women should have to have the "challenge" of trying not to be raped. If that makes me a bad person then so be it.
 
2013-01-19 12:52:35 PM  

Polyhazard: lordjupiter: My wife is a lot like you, and she's highly trained in self-defense. But I know that's not a guarantee, or a license to go around snapping "you got a problem?!" at strangers whose gazes linger a bit longer than is comfortable. She doesn't do that as much as she did in her 20s, which is when women really seem to get fed up with it and start looking to complain about it or challenge it...

Thanks for the advice, I guess... but could you please give it without being disingenuous and minimizing the problem women are complaining about here? Don't you think that's a bit insulting?



Could you please take advice without reading into it or being overly sensitive? Maybe you could read without thinking everyone is talking about you, or women in general, because of an actual anecdote?
 
2013-01-19 12:53:28 PM  

bunner: noitsnot: Admirable sentiment, but I think you are giving young people too much credit.

I give the more base aspects of the way people behave not a whit of credit, but if they can read and see the freely available map of every grand and every stupid idea - and their rewards and consequences - laid out in the vast and mind panorama of history, and do not invest the time, I not only do not give them credit, I'm pretty sure their cash isn't worth much, either.


Their cash is worth as much as anybody else's. That's how cash works, you idiot.
 
2013-01-19 12:53:40 PM  
So many crosses, and I'm fresh out of nails.
 
2013-01-19 12:55:13 PM  

Polyhazard: Thanks for the advice, I guess... but could you please give it without being disingenuous and minimizing the problem women are complaining about here? Don't you think that's a bit insulting?


It is insulting to do, yeah.

It's also one of the reasons (again, replying to your earlier comment) why some men get frustrated when some topics are brought up: Because it sometimes feels like their experiences, or the inequalities and unfairness they see (among others, aforementioned imbalance when it comes to the justice system with regard to female rapists, statutory or otherwise), are being minimized, or people are being disingenuous when replying to them, or discussing them. Not that "There are a lot of things we need to fix, some things other than that may have to get first", but sometimes what feels like outright dismissal. Like their experiences, or their encounters, do not matter and should never be considered. And it IS insulting.

Again, whether this is rational or not for some people to feel that their concerns are being dismissed is not for me to judge, but that IS where a good chunk of the frustration is coming from.

/In my opinion.
//I am not psychic, mind, so I could very well be wrong.
 
2013-01-19 12:55:21 PM  
A guy find a girl attractive and she rants on about how its rape. Good lord - is blogging all about being overly dramatic in every day situations?
 
2013-01-19 12:56:00 PM  

quickdraw: cabbyman: [thefamily.com image 360x190]

or this

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 400x400]


If that kick connected, she'd have at least 2 broken toes. She's doing it wrong.
 
2013-01-19 12:56:16 PM  

Benjimin_Dover: tirob: I do not recall my ever uttering any of the kinds of things the writer mentions to any woman or girl anywhere, at any time, nor do I recall any of my buddies ever having done so.

A good bit of what the writer describes in TFA would be classified as disorderly conduct here. May I suggest, ladies, that you all look up the relevant statutes where you are and that, if you are sufficiently alarmed by this kind of thing, you call a cop the next time it happens.

/I sense that the writer is bragging just a little bit....

Actually, what she can do is select a different venue. One that is not patronized by the type of men she described.

Pro-tip 1: if you go to a dive bar, you are going to run into people who go to dive bars.
Pro-tip 2: if you go to a meat market bar/club, expect to get "looked at" by people looking to pick up a piece of meat as you just put yourself into the display case.

Bottom line is, take responsibility for your own actions and choices.


No question that it is always all right for a man to look from a suitable distance.

However, taking responsibility for your own actions also applies to men who intentionally alarm women with obscene comments. I don't know what you call that where you are, but where I am it is called disorderly conduct and it is illegal everywhere, including dive bars and meat market clubs. If a man does this he can be arrested for it, and imprisoned if convicted for it.

I would advise any woman to stay away from dive bars and meat market clubs. But if that woman rejects my advice, she's still entitled to sit there and have a drink without being come on to in a gross manner.
 
2013-01-19 12:57:37 PM  
Let me state this flatly as a point of fact.

I FULLY SUPPORT THE DEATH PENALTY FOR RAPISTS.

That being said, it is a crime of violence and aggression meant to humiliate and demean.

But I do not equate it with being an ill bathed, greasy sh*tbag making sucking noises at women on the corner. That's called a free sideshow,.
 
2013-01-19 12:58:10 PM  

themasterdebater: A guy find a girl attractive and she rants on about how its rape. Good lord - is blogging all about being overly dramatic in every day situations?


Yeah, I'm pretty sure that the entire point of the practice of blogging.
 
2013-01-19 12:58:36 PM  

The My Little Pony Killer: THE GREAT NAME: A successful false rape accusation is just as bad as a rape and so the fear is just as legitimate.

Hahahaha no. Try again, with a little less butthurt this time.


Yes it is. If is successful it results in a long prison sentence, reduced employment prospects and stigma. Rape takes 3-9 years to recover emotionally. The prison sentence for the innocent man can be 5 to 20 years, which is longer. You can laugh if you need to, to try and make yourself feel more certain. But the fact is a false rape accusation is as bad as a rape.
 
2013-01-19 12:59:41 PM  

Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: There must be some real doozies in this thread- my ignore filter has blocked out almost half the comments. Am I missing anything?


Ha, I seem to be missing a lot of comments too. Isn't it funny how all the farkers who HATE women always show up in any thread that's about women to complain about women? You'd think that since they hate us--they're so over us that they can't even articulate it, how over us they are--they'd ignore the subject and go find some other way to spend their time. But no, I always find them puking and mewling in any thread about women and/or relationships.

/the ignore list is the greatest thing on Fark
 
2013-01-19 12:59:59 PM  

Felgraf: Polyhazard: Thanks for the advice, I guess... but could you please give it without being disingenuous and minimizing the problem women are complaining about here? Don't you think that's a bit insulting?

It is insulting to do, yeah.

It's also one of the reasons (again, replying to your earlier comment) why some men get frustrated when some topics are brought up: Because it sometimes feels like their experiences, or the inequalities and unfairness they see (among others, aforementioned imbalance when it comes to the justice system with regard to female rapists, statutory or otherwise), are being minimized, or people are being disingenuous when replying to them, or discussing them. Not that "There are a lot of things we need to fix, some things other than that may have to get first", but sometimes what feels like outright dismissal. Like their experiences, or their encounters, do not matter and should never be considered. And it IS insulting.

Again, whether this is rational or not for some people to feel that their concerns are being dismissed is not for me to judge, but that IS where a good chunk of the frustration is coming from.

/In my opinion.
//I am not psychic, mind, so I could very well be wrong.


How, exactly, does a person come away from a piece in which the author writes about her own experience as a female person, and how that experience is difficult to imagine from the point of view of a male person, suddenly add up to "the male experience is being dismissed?"

That's what's baffling to me. It almost seems like certain dudes simply can't stomach to idea of discussing a woman's experience without making it about making sure there's "equal time" for talking about men. What, exactly, in this article, is giving people the idea that this is about saying men don't matter?
 
2013-01-19 01:01:06 PM  

Pincy: I think the bigger point here is that it's not up to women to teach men how to behave,


I wish you would tell that to some of the women on here. Amirite?
 
2013-01-19 01:01:08 PM  

Pincy: WhippingBoy: Polyhazard: And what, exactly, was your counterpoint? Because I missed it. All I see you saying is "guys have been groped." How is that a counterpoint?

Perspective. As a man, getting groped is no big deal to me. So if I hear an anecdote about a woman getting groped, my own experiences and feelings say "no big deal" and, on an emotional level, I don't see what all the fuss is about. I don't think this makes me a bad person (at least I hope it doesn't).

There seems to be a lot of anger because "I just don't get it". Well... you're right; I don't get it. I've never been a woman, and while I can cognitively understand the fear and frustration that being groped might cause, it just doesn't hit me on an emotional level, because these are emotions that I've never had to deal with.

On the other hand, people have no problem telling me how wonderful and problem free my life must be because I'm a man, even though they themselves have absolutely no clue what being a man is like. To top it off, I'm supposed to feel ashamed if I even mention that I have problems and issues of my own to deal with.

I apologize if my comments have offended anyone; my intent was sincere (but perhaps misguided); I'm just trying to keep things honest...

OK, it sounds like you are being honest here, so don't take these questions the wrong way because I'm not trying to accuse you of anything.

Are you constantly being groped by other men or is this just a once in a blue moon thing?

Have you ever thought to yourself "that man is going to rape me?"


No, I'm not constantly being groped. Are you implying that constant groping is something most women have to deal with?
One of my "groping" incidents was by a group of three men. While I can't honestly claim that I thought I was about to get raped, the possibility did indeed cross my mind.

Do you see my point? I'm labeled as a misogynstic troglodyte because my I can't empathize on an emotional level in regards to these feelings because I've never experienced them. If I say "getting groped is no big deal", it's because I honestly feel that getting groped is no big deal (e.g. I'm not condoning the behaviour or writing it off as "boys will be boys", it's just that in my world, it truly is no big deal).
 
2013-01-19 01:01:16 PM  
Why is my beauty such a curse?
 
2013-01-19 01:02:04 PM  

THE GREAT NAME: The My Little Pony Killer: THE GREAT NAME: A successful false rape accusation is just as bad as a rape and so the fear is just as legitimate.

Hahahaha no. Try again, with a little less butthurt this time.