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(Jezebel)   Made for Fark headline - Unhappy with your gross vagina? Why not try "The Barbie"?   (jezebel.com) divider line 55
    More: Weird, Barbie, anesthesiologists, normal ranges, Journal of Sexual Medicine  
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19256 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Jan 2013 at 5:25 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2013-01-18 03:06:32 PM  
12 votes:
Ladies...No. Seriously. We love you just the way you are. Do not do this. You're beautiful and perfect and yummy. Good God.
2013-01-18 06:09:42 PM  
7 votes:

JonnyG: I'm just gonna come out and say it. There are some ladies who really need this. I've seen several less-than-beautiful vaginas. And can someone tell me why it is that they can't all be placed in the same spot? I swear, going from woman to woman is a pain in the ass just because of this. You learn the slide-in angle of one woman, move on to the next and all of a sudden the slide-in angle doesn't work and you're shattering bone.

Come on ladies. Please.


I'm just gonna come out and say it. There are some gentlemen out there who really need penis surgery. I've seen several less-than-beautiful cocks. And can someone tell me why it is that they all can't be bent the same way? I swear, going from man to man is a pain in the ass just because of this. You learn the specific curve of one penis, move on to the next and all of a sudden the angle doesn't work and you're getting your pelvis jabbed.

Come one guys. Please.
2013-01-18 05:46:30 PM  
7 votes:
I'm sad that anyone thinks this is necessary. I know it's an unpopular opinion around here, but it makes me ill that some women feel the need to mutilate themselves to feel beautiful. It is especially sad when women who are already beautiful do weird stuff like this. If any guy has a problem with the way your vagina looks, he doesn't deserve the privilege of using it.
2013-01-18 07:06:21 PM  
5 votes:
Here's how it all went. Japanese porn laws said, "No fur must show". So all the models, rather than covering that area, shaved. Two things came from that: The Japanese fascination with prepubescent schoolgirls and the Westerners all getting shaved. Now with that area all bare of fuzz, people are getting all sorts of opinions about how the newly exposed areas are supposed to look. Thanks again, porn. We all have to look like a small subset of the population (slender, a certain age, decorative in general).

Let me put it this way. If you are a woman and you want to impress a guy, ask yourself if you really want to be around guys who got their notions of female beauty from pornography. Men, if you are looking for someone who looks like a porn star, you're limiting the pool of women you can take your pants off with.
2013-01-18 07:42:46 PM  
3 votes:

Japonesa: Ewwwww, I didn't know the inside flippyflaps could get so large that they protrude beyond the outside flaps. I think I'd have mine hacked off too if they did that, that is just aesthetically unappealing.


Damn proud of my Mick Jagger lips. Think that's gross? Just picture the 8 lb human who entered into the world that-a-way. No complications. I'd tell you to kiss my saggy wrinkled boobs, but you're not worthy.
2013-01-18 07:24:47 PM  
3 votes:
don't do it, if someone says you should, punch them in the face and find a better someone
2013-01-18 05:41:15 PM  
3 votes:
So, without any hair or Labia Minora, won't a girl look just like a 12yo pre-pubescent kid?

That's revolting.
2013-01-18 05:38:38 PM  
3 votes:
How the hell am I supposed to get pussy juice all over the place if I don't have extra flaps to help spread it around?

/only saying it because you prudes won't
2013-01-18 03:27:53 PM  
3 votes:

alkhemy: As one of the comments says, it sound an awful lot like female circumcision...


It's done at the request of an adult, rational, woman who has agency.

Nothing in the article says it is done because of Patriarchy!

We know from other discussions that women get tattoos, wax their genitals, put on make-up, buy expensive shoes, worry about how they look when they go out, display cleavage, FOR THEMSELVES, AND FOR OTHER WOMEN, Not for men, who at any rate, should not be eyeing them and objectifying them.

Remember, feminism is the radical notion that men could hate women as much as women do.

So if a ton of women march into this guy's office and ask him for a barbie, I'm going to assume rational, adult women with agency have made their own decision and were not somehow brainwashed by an invisible sky demon.

Ask a contemporary feminist from Jezebel, if an adult woman wants a tattoo, should that be okay? Should adult women be able to decide on waxing their public hair, shaving their legs or underarms? Get piercings? Multiple piercings?

Is that patriarchal or empowering?

Ask any follower of body modification, if a man wants a circumcision, should he be allowed to have one? If a man wants to sever his penis or his tongue, should that be okay?

If an adult, rational, woman, with agency asks for a female circumcision, should that be okay?
2013-01-19 12:06:28 AM  
2 votes:

steerforth: Why am I not surprised that in a vagina thread, you two retards show up and start hating on women.


Heh. Okay, let's address those two bolded words separately. I'm not hating on anyone. No where close to it. I expressed amusement, and only amusement, at some self-contradictory bouts of vaguely directed anger from a website called Jezebel.

Second, angry feminists /= women. One is a very small subset of the other. Out of the many women I know, very few to none are bitter angry feminists. Even if I were to hate on them, which I didn't, that doesn't mean I'm hating on women in general.

Oh and relax, and lay off the "retard" stuff. You sound like you write for Jezebel or something.
2013-01-18 10:52:15 PM  
2 votes:
It really pisses me off when people refer to a vulva as a "vagina."

/That is all.
2013-01-18 09:52:06 PM  
2 votes:
Q: How do I make my vagina "pretty" and desirable?

A: Let some guy put his penis in it.

Lather. Rinse. repeat.
2013-01-18 09:34:57 PM  
2 votes:
The labia minora is usually longer than the labia majora. That's not weird it's normal. They are labeled minora and majora for anatomical reference not size. Also I read somewhere that there is a group of women from somewhere in Africa who genetically have very long labia minoras.
2013-01-18 09:34:25 PM  
2 votes:
i'm glad my fella likes me for more than one small, insignificant part of my body. by the way he's uncircumcised. imagine his horror if i told him to get snipped because i liked what the others before him looked like? he'd be right to get rid of me for my pointless focus on something as uninteresting as extra skin.
2013-01-18 09:16:45 PM  
2 votes:
This is incredibly disturbing. Also, there is nothing petite and athletic about mutilating a vulva. It's sad and insecure, and the results are about as appealing as Michael Jackson's nose.

This does seem like an inevitable end-point in a culture that obsesses over women's sexual desirability and then continually shames them for having typical characteristics of women's natural bodies.
2013-01-18 08:54:02 PM  
2 votes:

ThrobblefootSpectre: RoyBatty: [i.imgur.com image 599x1155]

So according to Jezebel - be angry if a man says are fine just the way you are. AND, be angry if there's something he would prefer different. Ooookay.


Gender Feminist Central Tautology:

Empirically we find

A. For every issue X, you can trivially find gender feminists that believe X is empowering, and gender feminists that believe X is oppressive.
B: For every issue X, you can trivially find gender feminists that believe X is empowering at time t, though in recent times near t, they believed it was oppressive.

This results in two lemmas:

Lemma of Feminist Empowerment: Women Now Empowered By Everything A Woman Does

Lemma of Feminist Outrage: Everything is a Feminist Outrage

These two lemmas form the basis of Girdle's Theorem of Completeness.

Girdle's Theorem of Completeness:

Any sufficiently gendered feminist theory capable of expressing outrage will not be both consistent and complete. In particular, for any consistent, effectively genderated feminist theory that assumes certain basic feminist truths, there is an infinite set of feminist outrages that are false, but always provable in the theory.

Combine the Feminist Central Tautology with the No True Feminist fallacy and you wind up

Conclusion: Gender Feminism has no principles. It stands for everything. It stands for nothing.
2013-01-18 08:37:46 PM  
2 votes:

To everyone stridently making assertions about women's right to agency:


1. Yes, adults have the right to make their own decisions as to body modification...

BUT...

2. That doesn't mean that every desire is a healthy one, or every idea a good one.

No, I don't think it is a good idea to have ones labia minora removed for cosmetic reasons any more than I think having toes removed to make expensive shoes fit is a good idea. Indeed, these are bad, stupid, ludicrous ideas.

/and if men want to do the equivalent, yeah, it's every bit as much a bad idea
2013-01-18 07:38:43 PM  
2 votes:
I've seen labia minora that extend further than any scrotum I've seen and I've seen equal numbers of both working in ORs. It's hilarious reading self righteous BS like this and then hearing the disparaging things women say about uncircumcised men and smegma. Women go apeshiat about smegma and say things that no man would I've ever heard say about thrush or menstrual bleeding.
2013-01-18 06:44:59 PM  
2 votes:

miss diminutive: JonnyG: I'm just gonna come out and say it. There are some ladies who really need this. I've seen several less-than-beautiful vaginas. And can someone tell me why it is that they can't all be placed in the same spot? I swear, going from woman to woman is a pain in the ass just because of this. You learn the slide-in angle of one woman, move on to the next and all of a sudden the slide-in angle doesn't work and you're shattering bone.

Come on ladies. Please.

I'm just gonna come out and say it. There are some gentlemen out there who really need penis surgery. I've seen several less-than-beautiful cocks. And can someone tell me why it is that they all can't be bent the same way? I swear, going from man to man is a pain in the ass just because of this. You learn the specific curve of one penis, move on to the next and all of a sudden the angle doesn't work and you're getting your pelvis jabbed.

Come one guys. Please.


Now that you've put pressure on me, I'm compelled to go get penis surgery because I can't think for myself or take responsibility for my feelings.

Someone out there doesn't like the shape of my penis. It's that person's fault if I go get penis surgery.

Seriously, are women *ever* to be held accountable for their own actions?
2013-01-18 06:27:34 PM  
2 votes:
Any woman who cares about what a man thinks of her down there to the point of obsessing about it has WAY more problems than a messed up cooter. This is someone men should be avoiding altogether so as not to perpetuate the retardation...
2013-01-18 06:19:39 PM  
2 votes:
When I express doubt at the end of the consultation, wondering aloud if I need the surgery, he shrugs his shoulders and smiles benevolently.

"Whatever makes you happy."


According to TFA, this is considered patronizing.

/wtf?
2013-01-18 05:28:53 PM  
2 votes:
FTA: " Blatt's website entices clients by stating that "Some women just want to look 'prettier' like the women they see in magazines or in films.""

Ugh, indeed. Fark society's standards
2013-01-19 12:03:50 AM  
1 votes:

steerforth: ThrobblefootSpectre: RoyBatty:

So according to Jezebel - be angry if a man says are fine just the way you are. AND, be angry if there's something he would prefer different. Ooookay.

Why am I not surprised that in a vagina thread, you two retards show up and start hating on women.


Hating on Jezebel is not hating on women, disagreeing with contemporary feminism is not hating on women, but thanks for playing.
2013-01-18 11:24:07 PM  
1 votes:
Ugh. I, for one, do not like the straight-line 'clamshell' vaginas. It looks all sealed up and there's nothing I find aesthetically pleasing about it.

I call 'em keyhole pussies, and no thanks.
2013-01-18 10:52:41 PM  
1 votes:

Skwach: So, maybe it's been asked already, but how is this different from male circumcision?


Only one is done to consenting adults, and has yet to have BS "it's healthier" claims attached to it.

/one son
//he has ALL his body parts, thankyouverymuch

WhippingBoy: bobbette: This does seem like an inevitable end-point in a culture that obsesses over women's sexual desirability and then continually shames them for having typical characteristics of women's natural bodies.

That's right! This is society's fault.

R.I.P. Personal responsibility


It's a bit silly to pretend that you can be in society but not of it. When it comes to beauty, much of what we claim to do of our own free will we do because of ingrained societal expectations. This goes for everything from teeth straightening to leg-shaving and beyond.

Still, I'm not going to blame this one on men. Women are harder on other women than men ever thought of being. I've never had a guy tell me my boobs are too big (though I'm sure they are for the taste of some men), but I've had women tell me that a few times. The hate starts back in junior high and never really quits.
2013-01-18 10:32:24 PM  
1 votes:

PillsHere: I'm sad that anyone thinks this is necessary. I know it's an unpopular opinion around here, but it makes me ill that some women feel the need to mutilate themselves to feel beautiful. It is especially sad when women who are already beautiful do weird stuff like this. If any guy has a problem with the way your vagina looks, he doesn't deserve the privilege of using it.


Why you think your opinion matters to someone doing something to their own body? It's nice you have an opinion and an asshole but people can also mind their own farking business. I notice you don't mention a word about any of the other dozens of cosmetic procedures women may and do have performed on themselves. And maybe these women are not out to impress you and your penis; plenty
of women prefer sex with women.

if a American woman looks in the mirrors and truly deeply hates the appearance of her mud flaps or breasts i say they should have access to these procedures free of charge. may happy big breasted women overrun the streets and malls of America. everyone benefits from beauty. i can't help being an art lover.

Outside of corrective plastic surgery that restores ones self esteem due to societies pressures or to help recover from abnormalities or accidents, the bulk of these procedures should not even be performed. All too often vanity procedures are performed on people in need of counseling, not surgery.
2013-01-18 10:19:27 PM  
1 votes:
This thread seriously made me appreciate my not-weird vagina.

I'll drink to that.
2013-01-18 10:19:07 PM  
1 votes:
2013-01-18 09:37:16 PM  
1 votes:

bobbette: This does seem like an inevitable end-point in a culture that obsesses over women's sexual desirability and then continually shames them for having typical characteristics of women's natural bodies.


That's right! This is society's fault.

R.I.P. Personal responsibility
2013-01-18 09:16:48 PM  
1 votes:

Japonesa: Ewwwww, I didn't know the inside flippyflaps could get so large that they protrude beyond the outside flaps. I think I'd have mine hacked off too if they did that, that is just aesthetically unappealing.


That can happen naturally if the guy you're with is any good at it. Some folks' labia are giant regardless of excitment, though.

Stupid to get it trimmed unless you're getting paid to be filmed in pornos.
2013-01-18 08:57:57 PM  
1 votes:

RoyBatty: Conclusion: Gender Feminism has no principles. It stands for everything. It stands for nothing.


It stands for whatever's most convenient and self-serving at any particular point in time.
2013-01-18 08:44:51 PM  
1 votes:

JonnyG: I'm just gonna come out and say it. There are some ladies who really need this. I've seen several less-than-beautiful vaginas. And can someone tell me why it is that they can't all be placed in the same spot? I swear, going from woman to woman is a pain in the ass just because of this. You learn the slide-in angle of one woman, move on to the next and all of a sudden the slide-in angle doesn't work and you're shattering bone.

Come on ladies. Please.


You really don't like women. That's ok. Why not give men a try? I think everyone involved would be happier.
2013-01-18 08:41:50 PM  
1 votes:

ms_lara_croft: When I first saw the words "the Barbie", I immediately thought of shrimp.

No, it's not like female circumcision. That said, it's sad that some women think their labia are so hideous that they feel they need to do this.


Actually, I would argue that this proceure IS like female circumcision but FGM, what is commonly called "female circumcision", isn't.

Calling FGM "female circumcision" is like calling a flogging a "spanking."
2013-01-18 08:32:18 PM  
1 votes:
I wonder how many people come in and request the Blue Waffle.
2013-01-18 08:27:51 PM  
1 votes:

RoyBatty: [i.imgur.com image 599x1155]


So according to Jezebel - be angry if a man says are fine just the way you are. AND, be angry if there's something he would prefer different. Ooookay.
2013-01-18 07:28:44 PM  
1 votes:
Much like being rail thin skinny the only people that really care are you and the magazine or gossip website trying to sell you something.

Unless your ladyparts hang down to your knees or something no guy really cares.
2013-01-18 07:25:45 PM  
1 votes:
trying to improve pussy. what have we become?
2013-01-18 07:06:36 PM  
1 votes:

Glancing Blow:
Type III (infibulation), removal of all or part of the inner and outer labia, and usually the clitoris, and the fusion of the wound, leaving a small hole for the passage of urine and menstrual blood-the fused wound is opened for intercourse and childbirth.
In the traditional manner by a circumciser using a knife, razor, or scissors


Jesus christ, people are vile.


It think I'm going to sign up for that one way trip to Mars.
2013-01-18 06:40:39 PM  
1 votes:
I have thought about getting this done and it is not because of how it looks. I find when having sex that they get in the way, which is something that did not happen before I had children. Time and child birth streched the buggers out and I would like to get them back to pre-birth days.
2013-01-18 06:37:42 PM  
1 votes:

RoyBatty: [i.imgur.com image 599x1155]


re: Jezebel hate-ical

It's too, too depressing.
2013-01-18 06:35:10 PM  
1 votes:

loonatic112358: HotWingConspiracy: Wake me when they perfect the horizontal slit.

That's easy, you just rotate the woman


My cousin told me oriental woman were that way naturally, when I was very young.  I wasn't all that disappointed to discover the truth a few years later...

On Topic, women, don't... Really don't.  Natural is better than fake every time.  Reconstruction is another matter,  and totally fine, otherwise be happy in your skin, some awesome someone will love you as you are.
2013-01-18 06:32:30 PM  
1 votes:
Labia minora and majora; those are the ones that are supposed to look like bears, right? I think the ancient people must have been tripping pretty hard cuz I never see that shiat when I look at the stars.
2013-01-18 06:25:30 PM  
1 votes:
i.imgur.com
2013-01-18 06:08:06 PM  
1 votes:
Have fun, ladies. *hurk* (Oh yes, NSFW)
2013-01-18 06:07:55 PM  
1 votes:
Sorry, but when I'm down there going at it I want something to actually work with and the more the better, IMO. The Barbie would be BORING!
2013-01-18 05:54:58 PM  
1 votes:
Nothing quite like eating a meat curtain cream pie. And ladies, try leaving a little fur done there. If I wanted the pussy to look like it was from a 12 year old, i'd get a 12 year old.
2013-01-18 05:53:07 PM  
1 votes:
I really, really don't get the appeal of this. And I think it's sad to consider just how awful a woman must feel about herself, that this sort of surgery would make her feel batter.
2013-01-18 05:51:57 PM  
1 votes:

JonnyG: Clearly some of you folks don't get laid enough. I wouldn't be surprised if a surprisingly high percentage of modern women shave completely clean. Especially single woman.


*twitch*
2013-01-18 05:48:27 PM  
1 votes:
144 vagina's would look weird.
2013-01-18 05:47:28 PM  
1 votes:
They had better add lighting and an iPod hookup.

I'm pretty sure my vagina can make it through the next 30 years without surgical assistance. Kthnx.
2013-01-18 05:41:59 PM  
1 votes:
Why is it always male doctors mutilating females? Are there any female doctors doing penis modifications that the media could interview?

/Ewww to all of the above.
2013-01-18 03:46:52 PM  
1 votes:
When I first saw the words "the Barbie", I immediately thought of shrimp.

No, it's not like female circumcision. That said, it's sad that some women think their labia are so hideous that they feel they need to do this.

Now I'm getting nostalgic for "Nip/Tuck"...
2013-01-18 03:28:51 PM  
1 votes:
Why is Jezebel slut-shaming these women?
2013-01-18 03:12:45 PM  
1 votes:
As one of the comments says, it sound an awful lot like female circumcision...
2013-01-18 02:55:04 PM  
1 votes:
Of course Barbie can look like that. Have you seen her boyfriend Ken, the penisless wonder?
 
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