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(Jezebel)   Made for Fark headline - Unhappy with your gross vagina? Why not try "The Barbie"?   (jezebel.com ) divider line
    More: Weird, Barbie, anesthesiologists, normal ranges, Journal of Sexual Medicine  
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19280 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Jan 2013 at 5:25 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-01-18 08:05:38 PM  

Skwach: So, maybe it's been asked already, but how is this different from male circumcision?


Because Patriarchy!
 
2013-01-18 08:06:57 PM  
static.ddmcdn.com

Completely unnecessary.
If you tug on an older broad's piss flaps with just the right amount of force,
they retract just like an old window shade.
 
2013-01-18 08:07:39 PM  
Ed Grubermann: I'd have died during birth if that were true.
 
2013-01-18 08:08:24 PM  

WhippingBoy: Rindred: The article redeems itself by linking to Show Your Vagina on tumblr. I forgot what the article was about.

I looked at that site. Not quite as good as the name would suggest. Not even close.


Dude, it's like this. If I'm going to be lured to Jezebel to read an article about labia (and how magical and wonderful those who have them are), the very least they can do is link off to pictures of 20something, non-pornstar, exposed vaginas. Hairy, trimmed, or shaved; it doesn't matter. If I'm going to read the trash, they better show some gash.
 
2013-01-18 08:10:13 PM  

Quantum Apostrophe: Oldiron_79: The way I'm hung I'd need to buy three H2s.


So you need an international CXT
 
2013-01-18 08:10:41 PM  

Rindred: WhippingBoy: Rindred: The article redeems itself by linking to Show Your Vagina on tumblr. I forgot what the article was about.

I looked at that site. Not quite as good as the name would suggest. Not even close.

Dude, it's like this. If I'm going to be lured to Jezebel to read an article about labia (and how magical and wonderful those who have them are), the very least they can do is link off to pictures of 20something, non-pornstar, exposed vaginas. Hairy, trimmed, or shaved; it doesn't matter. If I'm going to read the trash, they better show some gash.


Yeah, but it's like looking at a medical textbook. They could at least include some sort of insertion or something to spice things up a bit.
 
2013-01-18 08:14:44 PM  

Contents Under Pressure: Here's how it all went. Japanese porn laws said, "No fur must show". So all the models, rather than covering that area, shaved. Two things came from that: The Japanese fascination with prepubescent schoolgirls and the Westerners all getting shaved. Now with that area all bare of fuzz, people are getting all sorts of opinions about how the newly exposed areas are supposed to look. Thanks again, porn. We all have to look like a small subset of the population (slender, a certain age, decorative in general).

Let me put it this way. If you are a woman and you want to impress a guy, ask yourself if you really want to be around guys who got their notions of female beauty from pornography. Men, if you are looking for someone who looks like a porn star, you're limiting the pool of women you can take your pants off with.


Heh...the pool of women I can take my pants off with is unlimited.

The trick is more than once, of course...
 
2013-01-18 08:15:33 PM  

WhippingBoy: Skwach: So, maybe it's been asked already, but how is this different from male circumcision?

Because Patriarchy!


My bad. I forgot.
 
2013-01-18 08:15:33 PM  

E5bie: Japonesa: Ewwwww, I didn't know the inside flippyflaps could get so large that they protrude beyond the outside flaps. I think I'd have mine hacked off too if they did that, that is just aesthetically unappealing.

Damn proud of my Mick Jagger lips. Think that's gross? Just picture the 8 lb human who entered into the world that-a-way. No complications. I'd tell you to kiss my saggy wrinkled boobs, but you're not worthy.


Ewwww, boobs get saggy and wrinkled as well??!?!? If that happened to me I'd hack them off along with the enlarged flippityflaps.
 
2013-01-18 08:15:56 PM  

megarian: They had better add lighting and an iPod hookup.


HA! +1
 
2013-01-18 08:17:49 PM  
Me: "Mrs. Fool, I don't like lipstick"
Mrs. Fool: "You don't like the way it looks?"
Me: "I don't like it on my lips when you kiss me!"

/(Talking about mouth lips!)
// I really hate lipstick, but she likes the way it looks on her.
///so she likes it, and I put up with it.
//"In the dark, all cats look grey" Benjamin Franklin
/No point, just like this article.
/SLASHIES
 
2013-01-18 08:27:51 PM  

RoyBatty: [i.imgur.com image 599x1155]


So according to Jezebel - be angry if a man says are fine just the way you are. AND, be angry if there's something he would prefer different. Ooookay.
 
2013-01-18 08:32:18 PM  
I wonder how many people come in and request the Blue Waffle.
 
2013-01-18 08:36:26 PM  

AgentKGB: Not work safe... probably not lunch safe


[sigh]

I never thought I'd say it, but I miss gor

TanSau: Gor?

 
2013-01-18 08:37:46 PM  

To everyone stridently making assertions about women's right to agency:


1. Yes, adults have the right to make their own decisions as to body modification...

BUT...

2. That doesn't mean that every desire is a healthy one, or every idea a good one.

No, I don't think it is a good idea to have ones labia minora removed for cosmetic reasons any more than I think having toes removed to make expensive shoes fit is a good idea. Indeed, these are bad, stupid, ludicrous ideas.

/and if men want to do the equivalent, yeah, it's every bit as much a bad idea
 
2013-01-18 08:39:19 PM  

ThrobblefootSpectre: RoyBatty: [i.imgur.com image 599x1155]

So according to Jezebel - be angry if a man says are fine just the way you are. AND, be angry if there's something he would prefer different. Ooookay.


Just be angry about everything, that makes you hip, emo, and progressive.

/and always wear your "I don't want to live on this planet anymore.jpg" shirts
//because Futurama references will never get old
///you will, but they won't
 
2013-01-18 08:41:50 PM  

ms_lara_croft: When I first saw the words "the Barbie", I immediately thought of shrimp.

No, it's not like female circumcision. That said, it's sad that some women think their labia are so hideous that they feel they need to do this.


Actually, I would argue that this proceure IS like female circumcision but FGM, what is commonly called "female circumcision", isn't.

Calling FGM "female circumcision" is like calling a flogging a "spanking."
 
2013-01-18 08:42:16 PM  
my vagina is perfect to start with, thanks for asking. Then again, I don't have loose flaps or skin or large clitoris like some gals.
 
2013-01-18 08:44:51 PM  

JonnyG: I'm just gonna come out and say it. There are some ladies who really need this. I've seen several less-than-beautiful vaginas. And can someone tell me why it is that they can't all be placed in the same spot? I swear, going from woman to woman is a pain in the ass just because of this. You learn the slide-in angle of one woman, move on to the next and all of a sudden the slide-in angle doesn't work and you're shattering bone.

Come on ladies. Please.


You really don't like women. That's ok. Why not give men a try? I think everyone involved would be happier.
 
2013-01-18 08:47:05 PM  

Glancing Blow: Brick-House: Nothing quite like eating a meat curtain cream pie. And ladies, try leaving a little fur done there. If I wanted the pussy to look like it was from a 12 year old, i'd get a 12 year old.

Why is it that so many are familiar with what a 12 year-old's genitals look like.

I do not have control over what I find visually appealing. I like the look of shaved pubic areas. I also find some women's genitals attractive and some not. I don't get a choice in this.

And the problem with 12 year-old girls is there are 12 of them.


/ftfy
 
2013-01-18 08:48:25 PM  

fickenchucker: There's someone for anyone--this might not be such a great idea to have enter the culture.

That said, I have broken up with girls who have stray hairs around the areolas or wellie flaps. They're not my cup of tea. If I see wizard sleeves in my online pron, I click the close button as fast as possible.

/And I'm sure girls have broken up with me for arbitrary reasons, too, so don't yell at me.


Each of those women should send you a yearly "Thank you!!!" note.
 
2013-01-18 08:48:35 PM  

octopied: my vagina is perfect to start with, thanks for asking. Then again, I don't have loose flaps or skin or large clitoris like some gals.


Prove it.
 
2013-01-18 08:54:02 PM  

ThrobblefootSpectre: RoyBatty: [i.imgur.com image 599x1155]

So according to Jezebel - be angry if a man says are fine just the way you are. AND, be angry if there's something he would prefer different. Ooookay.


Gender Feminist Central Tautology:

Empirically we find

A. For every issue X, you can trivially find gender feminists that believe X is empowering, and gender feminists that believe X is oppressive.
B: For every issue X, you can trivially find gender feminists that believe X is empowering at time t, though in recent times near t, they believed it was oppressive.

This results in two lemmas:

Lemma of Feminist Empowerment: Women Now Empowered By Everything A Woman Does

Lemma of Feminist Outrage: Everything is a Feminist Outrage

These two lemmas form the basis of Girdle's Theorem of Completeness.

Girdle's Theorem of Completeness:

Any sufficiently gendered feminist theory capable of expressing outrage will not be both consistent and complete. In particular, for any consistent, effectively genderated feminist theory that assumes certain basic feminist truths, there is an infinite set of feminist outrages that are false, but always provable in the theory.

Combine the Feminist Central Tautology with the No True Feminist fallacy and you wind up

Conclusion: Gender Feminism has no principles. It stands for everything. It stands for nothing.
 
2013-01-18 08:57:57 PM  

RoyBatty: Conclusion: Gender Feminism has no principles. It stands for everything. It stands for nothing.


It stands for whatever's most convenient and self-serving at any particular point in time.
 
2013-01-18 09:05:26 PM  

RoyBatty: Any sufficiently gendered feminist theory capable of expressing outrage will not be both consistent and complete. In particular, for any consistent, effectively genderated feminist theory that assumes certain basic feminist truths, there is an infinite set of feminist outrages that are false, but always provable in the theory.


lol, that's pretty good. i suppose some of the humor (truth?) of it would be lost if one wasn't at least passingly familiar with the mathematical concept of completeness.
 
2013-01-18 09:06:07 PM  

WhippingBoy: RoyBatty: Conclusion: Gender Feminism has no principles. It stands for everything. It stands for nothing.

It stands for whatever's most convenient and self-serving at any particular point in time.


Yes, thank you, I believe that's an almost direct corollary of the Feminist Central Tautology and Girdle's Theorem of Completeness.
 
2013-01-18 09:06:16 PM  

sno man: loonatic112358: HotWingConspiracy: Wake me when they perfect the horizontal slit.

That's easy, you just rotate the woman

My cousin told me oriental woman were that way naturally, when I was very young.  I wasn't all that disappointed to discover the truth a few years later...

On Topic, women, don't... Really don't.  Natural is better than fake every time.  Reconstruction is another matter,  and totally fine, otherwise be happy in your skin, some awesome someone will love you as you are.


I've known at least one doctor who said he had seen it streched to the woman's knees.
/No I don't know how or why it was like that and frankly I don't want to know.
 
2013-01-18 09:16:45 PM  
This is incredibly disturbing. Also, there is nothing petite and athletic about mutilating a vulva. It's sad and insecure, and the results are about as appealing as Michael Jackson's nose.

This does seem like an inevitable end-point in a culture that obsesses over women's sexual desirability and then continually shames them for having typical characteristics of women's natural bodies.
 
2013-01-18 09:16:48 PM  

Japonesa: Ewwwww, I didn't know the inside flippyflaps could get so large that they protrude beyond the outside flaps. I think I'd have mine hacked off too if they did that, that is just aesthetically unappealing.


That can happen naturally if the guy you're with is any good at it. Some folks' labia are giant regardless of excitment, though.

Stupid to get it trimmed unless you're getting paid to be filmed in pornos.
 
2013-01-18 09:21:55 PM  

thatboyoverthere: I've known at least one doctor who said he had seen it streched to the woman's knees.
/No I don't know how or why it was like that and frankly I don't want to know.


All those years of letting the kids swing from it, I guess.
 
2013-01-18 09:27:49 PM  

RoyBatty: WhippingBoy: RoyBatty: Conclusion: Gender Feminism has no principles. It stands for everything. It stands for nothing.

It stands for whatever's most convenient and self-serving at any particular point in time.

Yes, thank you, I believe that's an almost direct corollary of the Feminist Central Tautology and Girdle's Theorem of Completeness.


Girdles are annoying and uncomfortable.
 
2013-01-18 09:34:25 PM  
i'm glad my fella likes me for more than one small, insignificant part of my body. by the way he's uncircumcised. imagine his horror if i told him to get snipped because i liked what the others before him looked like? he'd be right to get rid of me for my pointless focus on something as uninteresting as extra skin.
 
2013-01-18 09:34:57 PM  
The labia minora is usually longer than the labia majora. That's not weird it's normal. They are labeled minora and majora for anatomical reference not size. Also I read somewhere that there is a group of women from somewhere in Africa who genetically have very long labia minoras.
 
2013-01-18 09:37:16 PM  

bobbette: This does seem like an inevitable end-point in a culture that obsesses over women's sexual desirability and then continually shames them for having typical characteristics of women's natural bodies.


That's right! This is society's fault.

R.I.P. Personal responsibility
 
2013-01-18 09:38:49 PM  

thatboyoverthere: sno man: loonatic112358: HotWingConspiracy: Wake me when they perfect the horizontal slit.

That's easy, you just rotate the woman

My cousin told me oriental woman were that way naturally, when I was very young.  I wasn't all that disappointed to discover the truth a few years later...

On Topic, women, don't... Really don't.  Natural is better than fake every time.  Reconstruction is another matter,  and totally fine, otherwise be happy in your skin, some awesome someone will love you as you are.

I've known at least one doctor who said he had seen it streched to the woman's knees.
/No I don't know how or why it was like that and frankly I don't want to know.


Pictures on the internet can delight or horrify, many will do one for some and the other for everyone else.
I've seen things you wouldn't believe...
 
2013-01-18 09:40:50 PM  

sno man: Pictures on the internet can delight or horrify, many will do one for some and the other for everyone else.
I've seen things you wouldn't believe...


Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion?
 
2013-01-18 09:46:32 PM  
Some of those are so flappy, it looks like they could be used as an emergency parachute.
 
2013-01-18 09:49:40 PM  

WhippingBoy: sno man: Pictures on the internet can delight or horrify, many will do one for some and the other for everyone else.
I've seen things you wouldn't believe...

Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion?


I watched c-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate.
 
2013-01-18 09:52:06 PM  
Q: How do I make my vagina "pretty" and desirable?

A: Let some guy put his penis in it.

Lather. Rinse. repeat.
 
2013-01-18 09:58:39 PM  
Mine was just kinda made that way. Not barbie like... but you know, the inside doesn't stick out of the outside. At all. In fact, the ins are so small that I couldn't even get them pierced. Had to settle for the hood piercing... poor me.
 
2013-01-18 10:06:14 PM  

Oldiron_79: international CXT


meh
/220hp 540 lb/ft rated lmao
//needs a newer engine, that's '90's tech, DT466 in Navistar speak
 
2013-01-18 10:11:01 PM  

poison_amy: Mine was just kinda made that way. Not barbie like... but you know, the inside doesn't stick out of the outside. At all. In fact, the ins are so small that I couldn't even get them pierced. Had to settle for the hood piercing... poor me.


It's almost like you need to be hard done by.
 
2013-01-18 10:12:16 PM  

wambu: Q: How do I make my vagina "pretty" and desirable?

A: Let some guy put his penis in it.

Lather. Rinse. repeat.


The lather and rinsing are important steps.
 
2013-01-18 10:19:07 PM  
 
2013-01-18 10:19:27 PM  
This thread seriously made me appreciate my not-weird vagina.

I'll drink to that.
 
2013-01-18 10:20:30 PM  

Krieghund: wambu: Q: How do I make my vagina "pretty" and desirable?

A: Let some guy put his penis in it.

Lather. Rinse. repeat.

The lather and rinsing are important steps.


particularly between different penises.
 
2013-01-18 10:22:34 PM  

tinfoil-hat maggie: Ahead of the curve .(May be NSFW)


A volume warning would have been polite
 
2013-01-18 10:32:24 PM  

PillsHere: I'm sad that anyone thinks this is necessary. I know it's an unpopular opinion around here, but it makes me ill that some women feel the need to mutilate themselves to feel beautiful. It is especially sad when women who are already beautiful do weird stuff like this. If any guy has a problem with the way your vagina looks, he doesn't deserve the privilege of using it.


Why you think your opinion matters to someone doing something to their own body? It's nice you have an opinion and an asshole but people can also mind their own farking business. I notice you don't mention a word about any of the other dozens of cosmetic procedures women may and do have performed on themselves. And maybe these women are not out to impress you and your penis; plenty
of women prefer sex with women.

if a American woman looks in the mirrors and truly deeply hates the appearance of her mud flaps or breasts i say they should have access to these procedures free of charge. may happy big breasted women overrun the streets and malls of America. everyone benefits from beauty. i can't help being an art lover.

Outside of corrective plastic surgery that restores ones self esteem due to societies pressures or to help recover from abnormalities or accidents, the bulk of these procedures should not even be performed. All too often vanity procedures are performed on people in need of counseling, not surgery.
 
2013-01-18 10:39:56 PM  

Elegy: tinfoil-hat maggie: Ahead of the curve .(May be NSFW)

A volume warning would have been polite


What do you never go to YouTube? My volume stays the same each time I go. Weird.
 
2013-01-18 10:40:41 PM  

megarian: This thread seriously made me appreciate my not-weird vagina.

I'll drink to that.


Pics or it didn't happen.

/was inevitable in this thread.

_________________________________

On a serious note in review of the article, vilifying the doctors is idiotic. People generally come into the office with problem X(perceived or actual, the "problem" is there before the doctor visit), they don't go and simply ask, "What should I get fixed?" (well, a rare few do treat their docs like a lifestyle guru...these people need therapists, not plastic surgeons )

If you want X done, whoever, more power to you.

If people really wanted to make a difference they would encourage people to see therapists, not plastic surgeons if they're depressed or have a poor self image or what have you. That's about the only legit form of public education/protest. As RoyBatty pointed out, faux-outrage of the moment is transparent, and imo, just as shallow as those that they're accusing.
 
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