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(CNN)   US Navy minesweepers are usually very good at identifying hazards lurking below the surface of the sea. Usually   ( divider line
    More: Dumbass, navy, environmental issues, World Heritage  
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15871 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Jan 2013 at 12:08 PM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2013-01-18 12:12:37 PM  
7 votes:
Obvious case of Reefer Madness.
2013-01-18 12:12:45 PM  
5 votes:
They captain had had enough.  He wanted out, but still had weeks to go in his current duty.  He had to do something or risk going crazy.  It was reef or madness.

/you're trying to hard, idiot weasel.
2013-01-18 11:27:59 AM  
5 votes:
On a positive note, at least they didn't hit a mine
2013-01-18 01:09:09 PM  
4 votes:
2013-01-18 12:41:02 PM  
4 votes:

blatz514: They use these as minesweepers now?

[ image 850x533]

2013-01-18 12:33:54 PM  
4 votes:
I thought it said MIME sweeper.
2013-01-18 12:30:47 PM  
3 votes:
Captain didn't get the message about Apple maps?
2013-01-18 12:17:28 PM  
3 votes:
The captain of that ship is sooooo grounded.
2013-01-18 12:15:51 PM  
3 votes:
This is a reef, your call.
2013-01-18 12:12:55 PM  
3 votes:
Good G'reef!
2013-01-18 12:11:10 PM  
3 votes:

Good luck.
2013-01-18 11:02:59 AM  
3 votes:
I thought you said "MImesweeper stuck on Shields and Yarnel."

/Shields and Yarnel have no comment
2013-01-18 01:34:20 PM  
2 votes:

treesloth: They should get rid of minesweepers. Any ship can be a minesweeper, once.

That reminds me of a CSB:

In college I needed to find a 4 credit class and decided to enroll in the NROTC surface warfare class (as any college student could and I'd been a Marine so I was curious to see how the squids lived). One of the navigation problems was you see a ship in a channel displaying the lights (three green IIRC) that shows it is engaged in mine sweeping. What do you?

All the squids go up there and start doing calculations for how to give proper clearance and avoid the area the mine sweeper is working in. When it is my turn I walk up there, draw a U-Turn on the board and say "fark that, I'm not finding out the hard way they missed one or were wrong about where the mines were." The instructor stands there looking disgusted and finally goes "Well fark me, the entire class is dumber than the Marine."
2013-01-18 12:27:01 PM  
2 votes:

you have pee hands: Sometimes there's hidden rocks that aren't on the charts and are really hard to see. Sometimes, there's this:

[ image 640x360]

"Ooooh, look at all the pretty, feathery white caps over there! Helmsman, set course zero-nine-potato so we can get a closer look! Yaaaaaay!"
2013-01-18 12:19:38 PM  
2 votes:
They use these as minesweepers now?
2013-01-18 12:18:32 PM  
2 votes:
There's an O-5 who won't make O-6.
2013-01-18 12:17:03 PM  
2 votes:
How the hell could he not sea that coming? Now the ship is going to have to be reefurbished, the marines will have even more of a reason to make fun of us, and we'll have even less semen to man boats next year!
2013-01-18 12:14:36 PM  
2 votes:

CygnusDarius: [ image 170x259]

Good luck.

Those are mines. You sposed to axe permission.
2013-01-18 12:13:20 PM  
2 votes:
"The site is an excellent example of a pristine coral reef with a spectacular 100-meter perpendicular wall, extensive lagoons and two coral islands,"

(best Clouseau voice)

...Not Anymore.
2013-01-18 11:32:51 AM  
2 votes:
Sometimes those last few zones are purely luck-based. =/
2013-01-18 11:24:10 AM  
2 votes:
Career fast track!
2013-01-18 02:30:21 PM  
1 vote:
Maud Dib

Once in WWII a destroyer, during exercises, accidentally fired a live torpedo at the USS Iowa (or maybe one of the Iowa's sister ships) while FDR was aboard. They sent the entire crew to the Aleutians for the rest of the war.

Holy shiatballs, it's true.


"The mishaps began in earnest with the mysterious order to escort the pride of the fleet, the big new battleship IOWA to north Africa. The night before it left Norfolk, Virginia, the W.D. Porter successfully demolished a nearby sister ship when she backed down along the other ship's side and, with her anchor, tore down railings, a life raft, the captain's gig and various other formerly valuable pieces of equipment. The Willie Dee suffered mearly a slightly scratched anchor, but her career of mayhem and destruction had begun."

jvl [BareFark]
2013-01-18 02:01:56 PM  
1 vote:

xevian: you have pee hands: Sometimes there's hidden rocks that aren't on the charts and are really hard to see. Sometimes, there's this:

[ image 640x360]

There's reasons why the waves are like that. Surprised no one spotted that beforehand.

Tides go up. Tides go down. You can't explain that.

Tide might have been inexplicably up when they hit, and the photo taken when the tide inexplicably went out. That would explain why the boat is so far out of water in the photo.
2013-01-18 01:49:49 PM  
1 vote:

FarkinHostile: The CO ALWAYS fries. I was on the USS Ingersoll (DD-990) in '92 when we got in a collision with an oil tanker in the Straits of Malakka. The CO was a good guy, ran a pretty tight ship, was in bed asleep when it happened and he was relieved of command as soon as we tied up in Singapore for repairs.

The price you pay for command is you are responsible for any and everything that happens.

She's into Malakka's Dino...
2013-01-18 01:39:21 PM  
1 vote:
The reef was free of mines though, so you have to give them a little credit.
2013-01-18 01:24:23 PM  
1 vote:
Ban large capacity mine sweepers!
2013-01-18 01:24:19 PM  
1 vote:

shiattynick: Unbelievably stupid. That was one of the worlds most pristine reefs, definitely it's most undisturbed.
All the more reason why America's budget cuts should focus on reducing the military budget and not feeling like we have to police the world when we can't sustain our own damn country at home.

The only pristine thing in that area is a 7yo girl who's faster than her brothers and uncles.
2013-01-18 12:56:29 PM  
1 vote:
FTFA:"The cause of the grounding was under investigation, the Navy said."

I'm going to go with "Hit Reef". I think I saved the tax payers a lot of money.
2013-01-18 12:50:04 PM  
1 vote:
I guess the captain has a future job working for Exxon....
2013-01-18 12:41:34 PM  
1 vote:
2013-01-18 12:39:47 PM  
1 vote:
Maybe the captain just wanted to impress his girlfriend and let her drive the boat.
2013-01-18 12:35:24 PM  
1 vote:
2013-01-18 12:31:26 PM  
1 vote:
"The site is an excellent example of a pristine coral reef with a spectacular 100-meter perpendicular wall, extensive lagoons and two coral islands," according to the UNESCO website.

The URL was amended later to read :
"The site was an excellent example of a pristine coral reef with a spectacular 100-meter perpendicular wall, extensive lagoons and two coral islands," according to the UNESCO website.
2013-01-18 12:17:26 PM  
1 vote:
This would never have happened if we hadn't banned dichlorodifluoromethane, farktards.
2013-01-18 12:16:07 PM  
1 vote:
"You see that flash of light in the corner of your eye? That's your career dissipation light. It just went into high gear."
2013-01-18 12:15:36 PM  
1 vote:
When asked for advice, Al Gore told them to wait it out. Sea level should be rising by 3 meters any day now.
2013-01-18 12:12:15 PM  
1 vote:
"Sorry, boys... It seems we've run out of ocean."
2013-01-18 12:09:50 PM  
1 vote:
Must have left-clicked by accident.
2013-01-18 12:01:23 PM  
1 vote:
Some environmental group sues U.S. for irreparable environmental damage and being a giant poopy-head with their boats and ships and military imperialism and all, in 10... 9... 8...
2013-01-18 11:02:48 AM  
1 vote:
No one is perfect.
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