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(Huffington Post)   16-foot, 3500-lb. shark named Mary Lee spotted in the surf off of Jacksonville. Fortunately, nobody in their right mind would live or vacation in Jacksonville, so there's no danger   (huffingtonpost.com) divider line 74
    More: Florida, Jacksonville Beach, Jacksonville, Ocearch, New York Aquarium, Florida Times-Union, Southern Mississippi, World Wildlife Fund, Galapagos National Park  
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8837 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Jan 2013 at 10:11 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-01-16 10:14:25 AM
I submitted this last week with a better headline. Not bad for this vicinity.
 
2013-01-16 10:15:10 AM
Someone is going to need a bigger boat.
 
2013-01-16 10:15:54 AM
cache.ohinternet.com
 
2013-01-16 10:18:11 AM
FTFA:"Not every floating structure is a 'vessel'," Breyer wrote for the majority. "To state the obvious, a wooden washtub, a plastic dishpan, a swimming platform on pontoons, a large fishing net, a door taken off its hinges, or Pinocchio (when inside the whale) are not 'vessels'."

I love judicial humor ... haha.
 
2013-01-16 10:19:48 AM
Good name: Here lies the body of Mary Lee, died at the age of 103. For 15 years she kept her virginity. Not a bad record for this vicinity.
 
2013-01-16 10:21:21 AM
johnnycat.files.wordpress.com

Here lies the body of Mary Lee
Died at the age of a hundred and three.
For fifteen years she kept her virginity;
not a bad record for this vicinity.
 
2013-01-16 10:22:29 AM
Ahh.... spend 90 seconds googling a pic and lose the bragging rights to the quote.
 
2013-01-16 10:34:10 AM
Here lies the body of-- Already? Crap.

Drink to your leg?
 
2013-01-16 10:37:33 AM

that was my nickname in highschool: Here lies the body of-- Already? Crap.

Drink to your leg?


I got that beat.
 
2013-01-16 10:38:39 AM
Jacksonville Beach, not Jacksonville. Lived in Jax in the 80s, the only place crappier was Jax Beach. On the plus side, Jax Beach was a good place to score weed.
 
2013-01-16 10:39:28 AM
Welp.  I've got the heavy fishing gear ready if they need the shark extracted.

/going to need a bigger boat
//or any boat at all
 
2013-01-16 10:40:24 AM

Musikslayer: Jacksonville Beach, not Jacksonville. Lived in Jax in the 80s, the only place crappier was Jax Beach. On the plus side, Jax Beach was a good place to score weed.


Orange Park would like a word.
 
2013-01-16 10:43:55 AM
Musikslayer Smartest
Funniest
2013-01-16 10:38:39 AM



Jacksonville Beach, not Jacksonville. Lived in Jax in the 80s, the only place crappier was Jax Beach. On the plus side, Jax Beach was a good place to score weed

Lived in Neptune Beach myself '83-'88...it and Ponte Vedra were pretty nice, Jax Beach was indeed pretty crappy.
 
2013-01-16 10:44:56 AM
Deputies in Florida searching for Mary Lee. Their advice: If you encounter this shark you should clap your hands and say, "Shark go home"
 
2013-01-16 10:47:09 AM
i1.ytimg.com
 
2013-01-16 10:47:16 AM

telejester: Musikslayer Smartest
Funniest
2013-01-16 10:38:39 AM


Jacksonville Beach, not Jacksonville. Lived in Jax in the 80s, the only place crappier was Jax Beach. On the plus side, Jax Beach was a good place to score weed

Lived in Neptune Beach myself '83-'88...it and Ponte Vedra were pretty nice, Jax Beach was indeed pretty crappy.


It's pretty nice now with the new ampitheater and buildings.

CSB: watched a midget on a full size bike collide with a guy with no legs in a wheelchair outside the old Crab Pot. Possibly the most awesome thing I have ever seen.
 
2013-01-16 10:51:53 AM
Farewell and adieu, to you fair J-Ville bathers,
farewell and adieu, you Florida chums!

For we've received orders, for to GTFO,
and so we leave you, you Jacksonville bums.
 
2013-01-16 10:55:39 AM
Hot Carl To Go Smartest
Funniest
2013-01-16 10:47:16 AM

telejester: Musikslayer Smartest
Funniest
2013-01-16 10:38:39 AM

Jacksonville Beach, not Jacksonville. Lived in Jax in the 80s, the only place crappier was Jax Beach. On the plus side, Jax Beach was a good place to score weed

Lived in Neptune Beach myself '83-'88...it and Ponte Vedra were pretty nice, Jax Beach was indeed pretty crappy.

It's pretty nice now with the new ampitheater and buildings.

CSB: watched a midget on a full size bike collide with a guy with no legs in a wheelchair outside the old Crab Pot. Possibly the most awesome thing I have ever seen.


It is Florida, after all.
 
2013-01-16 10:56:04 AM
seen one eat a rockin' chair one time...
 
2013-01-16 11:07:35 AM
The beach has been cleaned up and it's a pretty nice place to visit now. It's more adult oriented and the beach area has some nice places to eat and shop. The downtown area has a great wine bar and some really nice places to eat as well. In July I was almost exactly where that shark was.. Probably about 10 feet north and a little closer to the pier.
 
2013-01-16 11:08:40 AM

Hot Carl To Go:
CSB: watched a midget on a full size bike collide with a guy with no legs in a wheelchair outside the old Crab Pot. Possibly the most awesome thing I have ever seen.


I envy you and your great fortune.
 
2013-01-16 11:10:07 AM
However, Ocearch chairman Chris Fischer

Uh, I know that they're trying to be clever and combine "ocean" with "research", but how the hell do yo pronounce that company name?

Oh-see-urch?

Osh-arch?

Oak-arch?
 
2013-01-16 11:11:45 AM
Jax Beach has one good night club called the Shim Sham Room because it is owned by a couple from LA.

The rest of Jax beach is for drunks, rednecks, and navy wives out throwing their tails around while husbands are at sea.

Jax has a good urban scene with the Burrito Gallery, Dos Gatos, riverside and springfield.

Other wise the town is a hole, and you can score weed everywhere.
 
2013-01-16 11:12:08 AM
this shark, swallow you whole!

little shakin'

little tenderizin'

down you go!
 
2013-01-16 11:12:44 AM

xBIGxEASYx: Deputies in Florida searching for Mary Lee. Their advice: If you encounter this shark you should clap your hands and say, "Shark go home"


I Lol'd
 
2013-01-16 11:14:13 AM
That great white is hanging out in Florida now, but will be headed up to Rhode Island soon for the ten year reunion in February.
thekillershow.files.wordpress.com
Such is the life of a rock and roll star. I'm sure they'll put on another killer show.
 
2013-01-16 11:17:06 AM

theflatline: navy wives out throwing their tails around while husbands are at sea.


i55.tinypic.com
 
2013-01-16 11:22:16 AM

FlashHarry: theflatline: navy wives out throwing their tails around while husbands are at sea.

[i55.tinypic.com image 379x214]


Hmmm GISed .. not impressed.
 
2013-01-16 11:23:50 AM
I know a dude who lives in Jacksonville, and he likes it..........he's also an ex-con.
 
2013-01-16 11:25:22 AM
Since this is Florida I am expecting the followup article showing someone trying to ride the shark.
 
2013-01-16 11:26:56 AM

that was my nickname in highschool: Here lies the body of-- Already? Crap.

Drink to your leg?


Nobody doesn't like Mary Lee
 
2013-01-16 11:27:07 AM
Living in jax isn't as horrible as all that. I've lived in far worse places. But let's all act like your crap town is better! I'm sure your bikini girls look much better reclining on your beaches...

\paid less for my awesome house in Jax than D-bags pay for their import cars
\\season tix to an NFL team for $600 doesn't suck either
 
2013-01-16 11:28:36 AM
Have lived in the Jacksonville beaches area for 17+ years now, after living for a while in the hellhole known as Ohio. All those taking shots at Jax are either a) jealous, or b) severely retarded. The only real problem I've found is that as time goes on, more and more people move here instead of going to the Compton of the east coast, Miami. Gotta go now, it's 80 degrees and I'm riding my motorcycle to the beach. Haters gonna hate.
 
2013-01-16 11:31:45 AM

NCg8r: Living in jax isn't as horrible as all that. I've lived in far worse places. But let's all act like your crap town is better! I'm sure your bikini girls look much better reclining on your beaches...

\paid less for my awesome house in Jax than D-bags pay for their import cars
\\season tix to an NFL team for $600 doesn't suck either


Yeah, but the NFL team sucks. And having lifeguarded in Fernandina for a few years, I'd say the beach scene isn't so great. More whales than otters, if you know what I mean.
 
2013-01-16 11:39:54 AM

Matrix Flavored Wasabi: More whales than otters, if you know what I mean.


THERE ARE LOTS OF FAT CHICKS
 
2013-01-16 11:46:40 AM
My mother's name is Mary Lee...so I'm getting a kick and whatnot
 
2013-01-16 11:47:20 AM

logicalman: Have lived in the Jacksonville beaches area for 17+ years now, after living for a while in the hellhole known as Ohio. All those taking shots at Jax are either a) jealous, or b) severely retarded. The only real problem I've found is that as time goes on, more and more people move here instead of going to the Compton of the east coast, Miami. Gotta go now, it's 80 degrees and I'm riding my motorcycle to the beach. Haters gonna hate.


Agreed. Love Jacksonville -- been here six years, moved from dirty Jersey.
 
2013-01-16 11:48:51 AM
When Navy men go off to sea, is it just assumed that their wives are going to cheat on them?
 
2013-01-16 11:48:54 AM
I grew up in Atlantic Beach - fun childhood but once I hit high school I could not wait to get the fark out of there. Now that I only have to be there for holidays I appreciate its strange charms. I mean, what's not to love about getting hit on by 85 year old ex-cons at Pete's Bar on a Tuesday night?

Also the water there is usually really cloudy, so I stay out of it. If a 16-foot great white is going to eat me alive screaming I at least want to see it coming.
 
2013-01-16 11:59:21 AM
I enjoyed Jax while I lived there. If it weren't for Atlanta, it would be the biggest city in all of Georgia.
 
2013-01-16 12:01:47 PM
Coming soon: Sara Lee Shark Pies


i291.photobucket.com
 
2013-01-16 12:03:40 PM
Yes, this place it terrible. Please save yourselves the ignominy of living or visiting such a horrible locale. I'll suffer the pain of taking your place by riding my bike down 1st Street this afternoon in our horrible, horrible 80 degree weather. You're welcome.
 
2013-01-16 12:15:57 PM
Candygram?
 
2013-01-16 12:18:35 PM
That news chick would be an awesome screw.
 
2013-01-16 12:18:52 PM

logicalman: Have lived in the Jacksonville beaches area for 17+ years now, after living for a while in the hellhole known as Ohio. All those taking shots at Jax are either a) jealous, or b) severely retarded. The only real problem I've found is that as time goes on, more and more people move here instead of going to the Compton of the east coast, Miami. Gotta go now, it's 80 degrees and I'm riding my motorcycle to the beach. Haters gonna hate.


While I would never claim Jacksonville is nowhere close to heaven on earth, I would agree that its better than a lot of places.
 
2013-01-16 12:25:09 PM
That news chick would be an awesome screw. .
.
No matter how good she looks, some guy, somewhere, is tired of putting up with her crap.
 
2013-01-16 12:26:49 PM
From the video, Ocearch founder Chris Fischer:
16' 3500lbs... nothing to worry about. - Umm ok
 
2013-01-16 12:33:25 PM

flsprtsgod: Yes, this place it terrible. Please save yourselves the ignominy of living or visiting such a horrible locale. I'll suffer the pain of taking your place by riding my bike down 1st Street this afternoon in our horrible, horrible 80 degree weather. You're welcome.


I was just going to suggest the same thing. Terrible horrible place...
/looks north, tips cap,
 
2013-01-16 12:52:53 PM

H31N0US: Matrix Flavored Wasabi: More whales than otters, if you know what I mean.

THERE ARE LOTS OF FAT CHICKS


THAT IS THE JOKE BEN!
 
2013-01-16 12:57:36 PM

airsupport: When Navy men go off to sea, is it just assumed that their wives are going to cheat on them?


I grew up not far from the Navy base in Bremerton WA. On the night a ship would go out, the bars would be packed with slightly obese women. They were called the Bremalo. I think there is something in the Naval culture where you just kinda get a pass for messing around.
 
2013-01-16 01:03:28 PM
When Navy men go off to sea, is it just assumed that their wives are going to cheat on them?

Was a college student in Charleston, SC, in the 70's...I had a 3-month girlfriend whose hubbie was a Lieutenant (jg) on the blue crew of an SSBN. When the sub came home, it was over just as easily as it started.
 
2013-01-16 01:06:55 PM

Magnanimous_J: airsupport: When Navy men go off to sea, is it just assumed that their wives are going to cheat on them?

I grew up not far from the Navy base in Bremerton WA. On the night a ship would go out, the bars would be packed with slightly obese women. They were called the Bremalo. I think there is something in the Naval culture where you just kinda get a pass for messing around.


www.lyricsfreak.com
is familiar with the breed
 
2013-01-16 01:08:28 PM
I wonder when you Jacksonville haters have been here last? I heard it was pretty bad in the 80s, with the stinky papermill and all. But now, it's pretty great. We have a beautiful riverfront, excellent beaches (Yes, Jax Beach is full of goofs, but Ponte Vedra is unreal), an NFL team, a "major" golf tournament, glorious weather, the Mayo F'ing Clinic, a respectable downtown, etc. What more do you guys want?

/tough crowd
 
2013-01-16 01:15:03 PM

Hot Carl To Go: telejester: Musikslayer Smartest
Funniest
2013-01-16 10:38:39 AM


Jacksonville Beach, not Jacksonville. Lived in Jax in the 80s, the only place crappier was Jax Beach. On the plus side, Jax Beach was a good place to score weed

Lived in Neptune Beach myself '83-'88...it and Ponte Vedra were pretty nice, Jax Beach was indeed pretty crappy.

It's pretty nice now with the new ampitheater and buildings.

CSB: watched a midget on a full size bike collide with a guy with no legs in a wheelchair outside the old Crab Pot. Possibly the most awesome thing I have ever seen.


Hehe, this reminded me of the time I saw a dwarf chasing a half-naked guy around our high school locker room with a knife. Totally surreal.

/Dwarf was the little brother of a wrestler, and friends with the guy
//guy was in the middle of changing, had his pants aorund his ankles and was joking around, making short jokes when the dwarf pulled the knife
///it was all in good fun...I don't think he really wanted to cut him
//I don't know why they let him get away with carrying a knife around school though...I guess nobody wanted to make the guy feel even more defenseless/singled-out than he probably already did
/But I'll be damned if that image wasn't burned into my memory forever
 
2013-01-16 01:15:52 PM

grinding_journalist: However, Ocearch chairman Chris Fischer

Uh, I know that they're trying to be clever and combine "ocean" with "research", but how the hell do yo pronounce that company name?

Oh-see-urch?

Osh-arch?

Oak-arch?


Oh-shurch?
 
2013-01-16 01:16:58 PM
I called Jax Beach home for many years and would love to go back. I'm currently sitting through a cold and crappy winter waiting for a position in my specialty to open in the Jacksonville office of my company. I love that place, because even after 10 years of living far away the bartenders at Fly's Tie still know me by name.
 
2013-01-16 01:19:35 PM

logicalman: Have lived in the Jacksonville beaches area for 17+ years now, after living for a while in the hellhole known as Ohio. All those taking shots at Jax are either a) jealous, or b) severely retarded. The only real problem I've found is that as time goes on, more and more people move here instead of going to the Compton of the east coast, Miami. Gotta go now, it's 80 degrees and I'm riding my motorcycle to the beach. Haters gonna hate.


I haven't been there in over 25 years, I can only speak of 1985-87 Keep in mind that us Yanks at that time knew Florida from TV: Don Johnson, Ferraris, South Beach, Supermodels, maybe some Gloria Estefan. Jax was Skynyrd and good ol boys, with a hint of "Deliverance" thrown in for good measure. They didn't have the Pro Football team, the fancy symphony hall, the Landing was being built when I left. It was the worst smelling city I've ever been in: paper mills and Maxwell House coffee do not mix. It was another time...
 
2013-01-16 01:26:12 PM
And you Jax Beach haters make sure you stay away from Springing The Blues. A 3 day free blues concert on the beach totally sucks.
 
2013-01-16 01:27:43 PM

aninconvenienterection: Oh-shurch?


I hear a lot of women are on those.
 
2013-01-16 01:33:26 PM
Moved to Jacksonville from Austin last August. I'm liking it so far. Love the beach, honestly.
 
2013-01-16 01:36:13 PM
The headline presumes that there are people in their right mind who live in Florida
 
2013-01-16 01:38:06 PM

telejester: Hot Carl To Go Smartest
Funniest
2013-01-16 10:47:16 AM
telejester: Musikslayer Smartest
Funniest
2013-01-16 10:38:39 AM

Jacksonville Beach, not Jacksonville. Lived in Jax in the 80s, the only place crappier was Jax Beach. On the plus side, Jax Beach was a good place to score weed

Lived in Neptune Beach myself '83-'88...it and Ponte Vedra were pretty nice, Jax Beach was indeed pretty crappy.

It's pretty nice now with the new ampitheater and buildings.

CSB: watched a midget on a full size bike collide with a guy with no legs in a wheelchair outside the old Crab Pot. Possibly the most awesome thing I have ever seen.

It is Florida, after all.


Sounds like something that could happen here out west on Venice Beach.
 
2013-01-16 01:49:57 PM

runningesq: I wonder when you Jacksonville haters have been here last? I heard it was pretty bad in the 80s, with the stinky papermill and all. But now, it's pretty great. We have a beautiful riverfront, excellent beaches (Yes, Jax Beach is full of goofs, but Ponte Vedra is unreal), an NFL team, a "major" golf tournament, glorious weather, the Mayo F'ing Clinic, a respectable downtown, etc. What more do you guys want?

/tough crowd


I grew up a few hours down the coast (Vero) and my only experiencing with Jax would be battling traffic on my way to / from visiting family up north. From the early 90's to around 2009 I pretty much just flew, because I had moved up north and just flew to ORL or WPB to visit Vero. In 2009 I drove down, and was kind of impressed by how the city had changed. In appearance, anyway.

I'd live there for a while if I could. Vero is only 4 hours away, which is close enough for a weekend visit, and far enough to keep my Dad from showing up at my house all the time with some crazy agenda.
 
2013-01-16 02:30:02 PM

runningesq: I wonder when you Jacksonville haters have been here last? I heard it was pretty bad in the 80s, with the stinky papermill and all. But now, it's pretty great. We have a beautiful riverfront, excellent beaches (Yes, Jax Beach is full of goofs, but Ponte Vedra is unreal), an NFL team, a "major" golf tournament, glorious weather, the Mayo F'ing Clinic, a respectable downtown, etc. What more do you guys want?

/tough crowd


Hookers?
 
2013-01-16 04:03:24 PM

Barnstormer: Ahh.... spend 90 seconds googling a pic and lose the bragging rights to the quote.


The bragging rights to that were claimed in comment #1. But as I was coming here with hopes to do the same thing, take heart, you beat the rest of the us by a mile...
 
2013-01-16 04:14:14 PM

logicalman: Have lived in the Jacksonville beaches area for 17+ years now, after living for a while in the hellhole known as Ohio. All those taking shots at Jax are either a) jealous, or b) severely retarded. The only real problem I've found is that as time goes on, more and more people move here instead of going to the Compton of the east coast, Miami. Gotta go now, it's 80 degrees and I'm riding my motorcycle to the beach. Haters gonna hate.


farkin a. Well said. The rest of the country is digging out of a blizzard and its 80 degrees and sunny here. Also, the PGA tour is headquartered here and some of the worlds top golfers live here. But you're all correct, its shiat. So stay in Pawnee or Cincinnati or wherever the fark.
 
2013-01-16 04:53:00 PM

Musikslayer: Jacksonville Beach, not Jacksonville. Lived in Jax in the 80s, the only place crappier was Jax Beach. On the plus side, Jax Beach was a good place to score weed.


Lived in Jax Beach (the hill) in the late '80's. What a dump.

Jacksonville, worlds largest small town. Further proof that in Florida, the further north you go, the further south you get.

FREEBIRD!
 
2013-01-16 05:23:43 PM
Is Hurricane Hattie's still around? I had a great time with some fake racked lass in the parking lot there....
 
2013-01-16 06:03:02 PM
Aah, Jacksonville. It's like the Florida of Florida.
 
2013-01-16 07:27:31 PM

theflatline: The rest of Jax beach is for drunks, rednecks, and navy wives out throwing their tails around while husbands are at sea.


Hey, that's my mother yer talkin' bout, mister!

/navy brat, JAX 93-96
//eh, it was true
 
2013-01-16 10:29:55 PM
Big mature female? Huge tail?
I am so there, dude.
 
2013-01-17 12:23:53 AM
Cue Arthur Fonzarelli.

static.tvguide.com
 
2013-01-17 07:00:26 AM

Poundit Hardus: Is Hurricane Hattie's still around? I had a great time with some fake racked lass in the parking lot there....


Gone but not forgotten.
 
2013-01-17 07:05:17 AM

Bruce the Deuce: Musikslayer: Jacksonville Beach, not Jacksonville. Lived in Jax in the 80s, the only place crappier was Jax Beach. On the plus side, Jax Beach was a good place to score weed.

Lived in Jax Beach (the hill) in the late '80's. What a dump.

Jacksonville, worlds largest small town. Further proof that in Florida, the further north you go, the further south you get.

FREEBIRD!


Hey, guess what? We po white trash dun elected us a black feller fo Mayor. It's almost like we's made some o dat progress stuff theyz talk about on the picture box up north where all the smart peoples live.

/Still have a ways to go.
//Better now than when I moved here in '94.
///WAAAAAYYY better than when my extended family settled here in the mid-80s. I thought they were crazy then and I'm a native Floridian.
 
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