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(Canoe)   Pirates or the Caribbean fans rejoice - the new film is being written by the guy who gave us Speed 2: Cruise Control   (blogs.canoe.ca) divider line 34
    More: Fail, Pirates of the Caribbean, Caribbean, pirates, Gore Verbinski, Johnny Depp, Ty Burrell, Brad Bird, Lone Ranger  
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779 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 16 Jan 2013 at 8:54 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-01-16 08:56:42 AM
Well, I'm a real fan of the Caribbean, but being a Pirate would be cool, so I'm conflicted over which way to rejoice.
 
2013-01-16 08:59:51 AM
Still haven't seen the last one.

Thought the first one was awesome. The next 2 were a mess with occasional fun bits.
 
2013-01-16 09:01:49 AM
There are fans?
 
2013-01-16 09:09:58 AM
Can't wait for Johnny Drop to drive his boat three miles inland
 
2013-01-16 09:12:25 AM
Alan Smithee?
 
2013-01-16 09:20:23 AM
Pirates.
No wait, the Caribbean.
No, pirates.
Yes, I rejoice due to the pirates.
No wait, the Caribbean.
 
2013-01-16 09:44:50 AM

moothemagiccow: There are fans?


I looked up the gross of the last film and it is $1,043,871,802, so apparently there are.
 
2013-01-16 10:09:10 AM
The first film was novel and fun. From the second one on it felt like they were shot without a script, given way more money than they needed, and did everything they could to spend every last dime of the bloated budget.
 
2013-01-16 10:23:44 AM
so three more hours of Johnny Depp sword fighting Legolas while desperately spewing phrases they hope will become a viral catch phrase
 
2013-01-16 10:24:50 AM
Saw a preview for "Lone Ranger." There was Jack Sparrow, wearing some kind of native disguise..
 
2013-01-16 10:30:00 AM

Cheron: so three more hours of Johnny Depp sword fighting Legolas while desperately spewing phrases they hope will become a viral catch phrase


Except Legolas wasn't in the last movie. Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley have made it clear for years that they don't want to come back to the series. So, yeah, way to keep up.
 
2013-01-16 10:39:16 AM
I didn't see the last one, but the first three Pirates were pretty good. Naturally the first two were more enjoyable but that's the consensus opinion on anything.

FTFA: "...but the film will be penned by Jeff Nathanson, who helped give the world Speed 2: Cruise Control."
That's canoe for you. Tongue in cheek honesty. I consider this their warning.
 
2013-01-16 10:45:55 AM
If this pirate ship goes slower than 10 knots, Johnny Depp's hat will explode!
 
2013-01-16 10:53:39 AM
Shouldn't that be "Pirates or the Caribbean fan?"

/I mean at this point...
 
2013-01-16 11:02:16 AM
Loved the first one, the second one was boring and felt like they were making it up as they went. That was the last one I bothered to watch.
 
2013-01-16 11:13:18 AM
If this galleon drops to lower than 3 knots, we all die!
 
2013-01-16 11:13:45 AM

devilEther: moothemagiccow: There are fans?

I looked up the gross of the last film and it is $1,043,871,802, so apparently there are.


That's insane. The last one was really really bad. I mean it was so bad that even the awesomeness of Ian McShane couldn't save it. I really really hope that dude spent the money he made on something awesome because I felt kind of bad for him for being in that movie.
 
2013-01-16 11:19:45 AM
Too bad, 1st three were some decent movies, but the last one was just "WTF am I watching" bad.
 
2013-01-16 11:27:54 AM
To be fair, Ian McShane couldn't save the last one because:
1. The character was horribly written
2. Ian McShane, for what I think is the first time ever, totally phoned it in
 
2013-01-16 11:52:42 AM
I was a fan of the first movie. The rest suck.
 
2013-01-16 11:56:43 AM
Have made several attempts to watch the last Pirates movie. It's the only thing in my 43 years of life that I've failed in; except for failing, of course.
 
2013-01-16 12:03:07 PM
Oh shiat
 
2013-01-16 12:55:21 PM
When i saw the second one, I couldn't help thinking of 'Freddie Got Fingered' towards the end when someone held up a sign that said "Won't This Movie Ever farkING end?"

I think there were two swordfights on top of giant wheels/balls in that movie. It's a puzzler right up there with the Star Wars movie where the big fish eats the little fish twice in the same couple minutes.
 
2013-01-16 12:56:29 PM

TeddyRooseveltsMustache: I was a fan of the first movie. The rest suck.

 
2013-01-16 01:13:54 PM

Pants_Optional: To be fair, Ian McShane couldn't save the last one because:
1. The character was horribly written
2. Ian McShane, for what I think is the first time ever, totally phoned it in


Nah, it is just that the last movie should really have been a farking trilogy. The movie had to move fast to introduce Isebella, Black Beard, the preacher and the mermaid. Plus the capture of the Pearl and all the rest. Too fast. Not enough time to develop any one character let alone all of them.

Hopefully they plan this as a trilogy or at least don't try to introduce too many new characters into one movie.
 
2013-01-16 02:19:36 PM
I see people piling on PC II-VI. Keep in mind those movies were made with a target audience that is younger than 18.....way outside the Fark demographic. The target audience loved those movies as demonstrated by their monster box office.
 
2013-01-16 02:34:21 PM
I love the Pirates movies. They're fun and entertaining. They got rid of the two weakest links in the last one (Bloom and Knightley) and put more light on the two strongest links (Rush and Depp), and they cast a great actor to play a heartless villain. I have no problem with how they move forward from here.

/When can I get a goddamn Barbossa spin-off movie?!
//Barbossa and Human Davy Jones vs. the entire Spanish Armada
///Make it happen, Hollywood!
 
2013-01-16 03:06:06 PM
A script? Well, that's already an improvement over the last 3 films.
 
2013-01-16 03:49:13 PM

mooseyfate: I love the Pirates movies. They're fun and entertaining. They got rid of the two weakest links in the last one (Bloom and Knightley) and put more light on the two strongest links (Rush and Depp), and they cast a great actor to play a heartless villain. I have no problem with how they move forward from here.

/When can I get a goddamn Barbossa spin-off movie?!
//Barbossa and Human Davy Jones vs. the entire Spanish Armada
///Make it happen, Hollywood!


This
Love the Pirates movies. Got the set for Christmas too :)
 
2013-01-16 04:24:22 PM
Opinions on whether the 2nd and 3rd films were good vary, for sure. I think the 2nd film was better than the first, or third, much like the Spider-man trilogy. That being said, Davy Jones was one awesome character in the movie from a technological standpoint to great writing and acting by Bill NIghy.
 
2013-01-16 05:22:13 PM
At least there's some good news coming out of hollywood. Like the Shadow of the Colossus film is no longer being written by the man that gave us Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun Li...
 
2013-01-16 07:16:28 PM

mooseyfate: I love the Pirates movies. They're fun and entertaining. They got rid of the two weakest links in the last one (Bloom and Knightley) and put more light on the two strongest links (Rush and Depp), and they cast a great actor to play a heartless villain. I have no problem with how they move forward from here.

/When can I get a goddamn Barbossa spin-off movie?!
//Barbossa and Human Davy Jones vs. the entire Spanish Armada
///Make it happen, Hollywood!


I enjoyed them too, but Bloom and Knightley were not weak links, sorry. Some of the best exchanges were between Depp and Knightly. Also, the last film sorely, sorely missed the two bumbling British soldiers (that became pirates) and the two bumbling pirates as well.
 
2013-01-17 02:27:03 AM
I love the first one, and can enjoy the second and third for Davy Jones at the very least. I think it was in a commentary for the second one that the 'writers' admit they didn't have a plan for a sequel, the studio demanded it, and they were essentially writing it as it was filmed.

The last one was adapted from a mediocre book that happened to have pirates and sea vessels. That one was just jumping from throwaway character to throwaway character offering perfect information on exactly where this mystical treasure that no one has discovered but everyone knows how to get to is. Swearengen knew it was poorly written by a bunch of cocksuckers.
 
2013-01-17 12:46:31 PM

chewielouie: mooseyfate: I love the Pirates movies. They're fun and entertaining. They got rid of the two weakest links in the last one (Bloom and Knightley) and put more light on the two strongest links (Rush and Depp), and they cast a great actor to play a heartless villain. I have no problem with how they move forward from here.

/When can I get a goddamn Barbossa spin-off movie?!
//Barbossa and Human Davy Jones vs. the entire Spanish Armada
///Make it happen, Hollywood!

I enjoyed them too, but Bloom and Knightley were not weak links, sorry. Some of the best exchanges were between Depp and Knightly. Also, the last film sorely, sorely missed the two bumbling British soldiers (that became pirates) and the two bumbling pirates as well.


I would have given Knightley a pass but unfortunately the movies only offer her character as a package deal with Bloom's. If Orlando Bloom was a gangrenous finger, Knightly was the hand they amputated to save the whole arm.
 
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