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(The Onion)   The Six best dresses at the Golden Globes. Warning: Slideshow   (theonion.com) divider line 93
    More: Ironic, Golden Globes  
•       •       •

12434 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 15 Jan 2013 at 3:01 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



93 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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2013-01-15 02:18:35 PM
I don't get it.
 
2013-01-15 02:35:33 PM

Popcorn Johnny: I don't get it.


There's more newsworthy stories than who wore what dress at the Golden Globes....unless, of course, one of those dresses is really revealing and/or see-through.  Then that trumps all...
 
2013-01-15 02:52:27 PM
There is such violence and inhumanity. It makes me feel mean and small to ever have clicked on a "best dressed at the awards" link. Now fark off.
 
2013-01-15 02:55:55 PM
There's not going to be a lot of hits there, I don't think there are enough gay guys on Fark.....oh, it's an Onion article so it must be terribly clever and satirical. Nevermind.
 
2013-01-15 03:01:00 PM

Mugato: There's not going to be a lot of hits there, I don't think there are enough gay guys on Fark.....oh, it's an Onion article so it must be terribly clever and satirical. Nevermind.


Don't talk about me like I'm not here! *runs out of thread crying*
 
2013-01-15 03:06:47 PM
Poignant political commentary in my Onion?
 
2013-01-15 03:08:26 PM
Brilliant.
 
2013-01-15 03:09:25 PM
i104.photobucket.com
 
2013-01-15 03:09:37 PM
Because it is impossible to simultaneously be interested in fashion and world events at the same time. Our minds are too simple to process more than one thing, so it is our duty to focus only on the most terrible.
 
2013-01-15 03:10:48 PM
Gonna have to pass on this Onion article.. It's delving way too much into serious political agenda territory.   They're usually good at dancing around this sort of thing and making it all about a cheap laugh.  This just sucks.
 
2013-01-15 03:13:36 PM
doh! blocked at work. is it worth pursuing at home?
 
2013-01-15 03:14:54 PM

sedric: doh! blocked at work. is it worth pursuing at home?


No.
 
2013-01-15 03:16:23 PM

UberDave: Popcorn Johnny: I don't get it.

There's more newsworthy stories than who wore what dress at the Golden Globes....unless, of course, one of those dresses is really revealing and/or see-through.  Then that trumps all...


I thought number 2 was really smokin' hot.
 
2013-01-15 03:17:13 PM
Oh, I forgot, this is FARK, where really smart people can come up with better things than this, but instead of doing that, they decide to complain about it. Eat some shiat.
 
2013-01-15 03:17:37 PM

styckx: Gonna have to pass on this Onion article.. It's delving way too much into serious political agenda territory.   They're usually good at dancing around this sort of thing and making it all about a cheap laugh.  This just sucks.


The Onion has been trending that way for quite a while. I think the major problem is that it's honestly hard to separate some of their headlines from the more bizarre things coming out of Washington these days. Other headlines ("2012 Was Once Considered Hottest Year On Record, Man In 2024 Remembers Wistfully" and "Gorilla Sales Skyrocket After Latest Gorilla Attack" come to mind) are such perfect mirrors of what's going on they almost aren't satire anymore, much like the Daily Show has become the best news program out there despite the high fart joke percentage.

Today's "Ten Percent Of U.S. High School Students Graduating Without Basic Object Permanence Skills" story is farking brilliant however.
 
2013-01-15 03:19:18 PM
I for one think this is an excellent critique of America's hollywood-obsessed culture.

meddleRPI: Because it is impossible to simultaneously be interested in fashion and world events at the same time. Our minds are too simple to process more than one thing, so it is our duty to focus only on the most terrible.


I don't think the point is that people can't focus on the two things at once, I think it's pointing out the absurdity that anyone gives a flying crap about Hollywood, Hollywood awards shows, or the insanely expensive clothes that said hollywood idiots wear to said hollywood shows.
 
2013-01-15 03:19:21 PM

KatjaMouse: [i104.photobucket.com image 500x371]


*clap* *clap* clap*

I had a feeling the Onion had some sort of trick up their sleeve, because that was just too standard a headline.
 
2013-01-15 03:20:09 PM
This. Is. farking. Awesome.
 
2013-01-15 03:21:47 PM

Brentmeister General: Oh, I forgot, this is FARK, where really smart people can come up with better things than this, but instead of doing that, they decide to complain about it. Eat some shiat.


I'm guessing you are into more subtle humor like the Three Stooges then?
 
2013-01-15 03:27:33 PM

meddleRPI: Because it is impossible to simultaneously be interested in fashion and world events at the same time. Our minds are too simple to process more than one thing, so it is our duty to focus only on the most terrible.


The point that you are missing is that fashion should only be front-page news in a fashion magazine or website, and never anywhere else, because fashion can never be that important.
 
2013-01-15 03:32:18 PM

meddleRPI: Because it is impossible to simultaneously be interested in fashion and world events at the same time. Our minds are too simple to process more than one thing, so it is our duty to focus only on the most terrible.


love the onion.. have every book they ever made and still peruse them daily.

but i completely agree with you, they can do better then this.
 
2013-01-15 03:32:51 PM
I laughed, but then I felt kind of depressed.
 
2013-01-15 03:33:52 PM

Bukharin: thought number 2 was really smokin' hot.


It's ok, but number 5 has obvious nip slippage.  Besides, I'm a huge fan of side-boob.
 
2013-01-15 03:34:55 PM
Great use of ironic since the Onion has never tackled a serious issue head on either.

/still like the Onion
 
2013-01-15 03:35:05 PM
Sex-ee!
 
2013-01-15 03:39:21 PM
There are a lot of Farkers who seem mad at having to fap to images of war.
 
2013-01-15 03:39:50 PM
Clap.

Clap.

Clap.

Beautiful.
 
2013-01-15 03:45:35 PM
The Onion has just cancelled all shore leave. They've just had an unhappy love affair, so they don't see why anyone else should have a good time.
 
2013-01-15 03:48:39 PM
Warning: Golden Globes
 
2013-01-15 04:01:01 PM

space1999: meddleRPI: Because it is impossible to simultaneously be interested in fashion and world events at the same time. Our minds are too simple to process more than one thing, so it is our duty to focus only on the most terrible.

The point that you are missing is that fashion should only be front-page news in a fashion magazine or website, and never anywhere else, because fashion can never be that important.


It's usually a sidebar link, or rotating header. I agree that that's probably too much, and that many people care too much about what celebrities do and wear than current events, but let's stop pretending like it's not a part of our culture anymore.

It exists, it's popular art, and it has some widespread cultural relevance. Realize that, move on, and if you care enough, figure out a way to leverage it to bring attention to other events.
 
2013-01-15 04:08:38 PM

Tyrone Slothrop: The Onion has just cancelled all shore leave. They've just had an unhappy love affair, so they don't see why anyone else should have a good time.


That's about it. I hate fashion shows and the Today Show babbling over what some D-list celebrity said last night as much as the next guy. But this is just cheap "Please think of the children!" pandering to people already pre-disposed to hate red carpets and lights.

Make it about Pitchfork jabbering about Bon Iver or the AV Club comparing Community to the third act of Hamlet, and we'll have humor with a hint of edge.
 
2013-01-15 04:10:35 PM
Perfectly brilliant.
 
2013-01-15 04:19:45 PM

halfof33: Brentmeister General: Oh, I forgot, this is FARK, where really smart people can come up with better things than this, but instead of doing that, they decide to complain about it. Eat some shiat.

I'm guessing you are into more subtle humor like the Three Stooges then?


Way to miss the point. I'd ask if you are new here but we all know you aren't.

Glockenspiel Hero: "Gorilla Sales Skyrocket After Latest Gorilla Attack" come to mind


That one approached "Modest Proposal" level satire in my book.
 
2013-01-15 04:21:19 PM

meddleRPI: Because it is impossible to simultaneously be interested in fashion and world events at the same time. Our minds are too simple to process more than one thing, so it is our duty to focus only on the most terrible.


In all fairness it's making the statement that too many people pay attention to the former and not the latter.
 
2013-01-15 04:21:45 PM
I don't even know how this made the list. The red head piece totally clashes with and defeats the purpose of the overall Camo theme. The judges must have had a gun to their head to include this.

o.onionstatic.com
 
2013-01-15 04:24:08 PM
I dunno... Claire Danes was on fire, but that dress made her look kind of rectangular.
 
2013-01-15 04:25:52 PM

factoryconnection: Way to miss the point. I'd ask if you are new here but we all know you aren't.


Way to miss the point, area man. That Onion article made a sledgehammer to the cranium look understated by comparison. Maybe you'll like this one!

Knock knock!
Who's there?
Golden Globes!
Golden globes who?
Golden globes ignore the immense physical and emotional pain and death in Darfur!

HA!
 
2013-01-15 04:28:38 PM
Dumb, did not meet eye candy expectations
 
2013-01-15 04:30:28 PM
Yeah, I get it.  And yes, fashion is stupid and unimportant.

But if we spend our time actually focused on all the mayhem, violence, death and evil in the world we'd all be farking insane.

I don't suppose anyone at the Onion watches any football games, or tv shows, or reads a book, or exercises...all of which are not as important in the big picture as the horrific things happening around the world.

Swing and a miss for this Onion this time.  They usually don't hit you over the head when trying to make a point.  I expect more cleverness and bite from them.  Their reaction to Sandy Hook was letter perfect, for example.
 
2013-01-15 04:36:01 PM
Here's a howler!

Policeman: Knock, knock.
Woman: Who's there?
Policeman: The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your husband has been killed in Syria. There was nothing we could do because the United Nations has refused to heed the anguished cries for help from that deeply troubled region.

lolz.
 
2013-01-15 04:42:00 PM
At first I was like "THOSE AREN'T DRESSES!?" Then I was like "Oooh."
 
2013-01-15 04:48:29 PM

Brentmeister General: Oh, I forgot, this is FARK, where really smart people can come up with better things than this, but instead of doing that, they decide to complain about it. Eat some shiat.


Hey now, hold your horses!
Welcome to Fark.
 
2013-01-15 05:01:15 PM

Brick-House: I don't even know how this made the list. The red head piece totally clashes with and defeats the purpose of the overall Camo theme. The judges must have had a gun to their head to include this.

[o.onionstatic.com image 850x477]


The Russian-made weapon juxtaposed against the Korean-made truck is the point of the (you should pardon the pun) shot; the red hounds tooth schmatta is merely window dressing. It's Vera Wang - just go with it.
 
2013-01-15 05:01:32 PM
Dear Syrians,

Kill each other all you want.
Very few farks will be given.

xoxoxo

The World
 
2013-01-15 05:07:37 PM
The slideshow, idealized:

wallpaper.celebritypc.com

www.whitegadget.com

www.99wallpaper.com

i.imgur.com

www.moviesera.com

www.my-wallpapers.org

On the topic of the slideshow: I get it. There are starving children in the world and wars going on. But if I spent every waking hour concerned about it, I'd be a manic depressive. From time to time, I like to take time out from caring and look at attractive women, and so does most of America. I love The Onion, but occasionally it can be a tad pretentious.
 
2013-01-15 05:09:30 PM

Brick-House: I don't even know how this made the list. The red head piece totally clashes with and defeats the purpose of the overall Camo theme. The judges must have had a gun to their head to include this.

[o.onionstatic.com image 850x477]


On the positive side, it does take balls to arrive at the Golden Globes in a piece of shiat Daewoo.
 
2013-01-15 05:18:05 PM
i dont get it either.
 
2013-01-15 05:21:44 PM

Brentmeister General: Oh, I forgot, this is FARK, where really smart people can come up with better things than this, but instead of doing that, they decide to complain about it. Eat some shiat.


The Onion has been at the top of it's game in the last few months. Fark and farkers never have.
 
2013-01-15 05:25:04 PM
Love the dress that was blood red.
 
2013-01-15 05:26:10 PM
LOL at those arabs killing themselves.
 
2013-01-15 05:33:10 PM
Blood all over your shirt is sooo last season.
 
2013-01-15 05:45:42 PM
There's nothing like pointing out the insincerity or lack of empathy in our media by showing the real problems in the world and making jokes about it.
 
2013-01-15 05:54:18 PM
Sweet delicious irony
 
2013-01-15 06:09:02 PM
My experience with the Onion is hit and miss. About 15% of the time I think it's funny, the rest of the time not so much.
15% is not really a bad success rate for internet comedy.
 
2013-01-15 06:20:49 PM
Needs more side boob

impose.vaesite.net
 
2013-01-15 06:49:04 PM

wildcardjack: Needs more side boob


Hey, anybody got the original of that pic?
 
2013-01-15 06:53:01 PM

AdolfOliverPanties: Yeah, I get it.  And yes, fashion is stupid and unimportant.

But if we spend our time actually focused on all the mayhem, violence, death and evil in the world we'd all be farking insane.

I don't suppose anyone at the Onion watches any football games, or tv shows, or reads a book, or exercises...all of which are not as important in the big picture as the horrific things happening around the world.

Swing and a miss for this Onion this time.  They usually don't hit you over the head when trying to make a point.  I expect more cleverness and bite from them.  Their reaction to Sandy Hook was letter perfect, for example.


The nightly news is between 19 and 22 minutes long. When they talk about the golden globes for 3 minutes and don't mention what is going on in Syria or Pakistan yes there is a problem with news and it deserve ridicule
 
2013-01-15 07:00:13 PM

csi_yellowknife: Tyrone Slothrop: The Onion has just cancelled all shore leave. They've just had an unhappy love affair, so they don't see why anyone else should have a good time.

That's about it. I hate fashion shows and the Today Show babbling over what some D-list celebrity said last night as much as the next guy. But this is just cheap "Please think of the children!" pandering to people already pre-disposed to hate red carpets and lights.

Make it about Pitchfork jabbering about Bon Iver or the AV Club comparing Community to the third act of Hamlet, and we'll have humor with a hint of edge.


so this.
 
2013-01-15 07:18:50 PM
Don't worry - at the rate we're racing to throw away everything that's made America safe and prosperous, we'll be looking like those slides before long.
 
2013-01-15 07:39:55 PM

elvindeath: Don't worry - at the rate we're racing to throw away everything that's made America safe and prosperous, we'll be looking like those slides before long.


I wonder if America ever did have international goodwill, or we all just feared you more than we hated you.
 
2013-01-15 07:40:55 PM

Carth: The nightly news is between 19 and 22 minutes long. When they talk about the golden globes for 3 minutes and don't mention what is going on in Syria or Pakistan yes there is a problem with news and it deserve ridicule


Good god, what cable service do you subscribe to?
 
2013-01-15 07:43:21 PM
news flash: no one cares about brown people

especially those of moohammed
 
2013-01-15 08:14:34 PM

red5ish: Carth: The nightly news is between 19 and 22 minutes long. When they talk about the golden globes for 3 minutes and don't mention what is going on in Syria or Pakistan yes there is a problem with news and it deserve ridicule

Good god, what cable service do you subscribe to?


None?
/not everyone needs 500 channels
 
2013-01-15 08:14:36 PM

thisiszombocom: news flash: no one cares about brown people

especially those of moohammed


There were tons of them on the show! Is Hollywood trying to appease the Mooslims/ dark brown people or trying to celebrate its multiculturist/ religious acceptance/ tolerance?!

As an 'Murican, I demand white Christian supremacist representations. Daniel Day-Lewis? Farking Brit should be deported. 1778, 'Murcans. Never forget.
 
2013-01-15 08:16:30 PM

TalenLee: elvindeath: Don't worry - at the rate we're racing to throw away everything that's made America safe and prosperous, we'll be looking like those slides before long.

I wonder if America ever did have international goodwill, or we all just feared you more than we hated you.


Who gives a crap if America has international goodwill ? The "international community" sucks the wang of every two bit dictator and maniac on the planet. Jefferson was right - let the rest of the cesspool of a planet live however they want, just refuse to be brought down by them. What I'm talking about is America's recent excitement at destroying the "rugged individualist" spirit that put us at the top of the heap so we can join the ranks of the failed Euro welfare states sitting on our collective ass waiting for someone else (government, bigger government, or - when that all fails - some other America) to come fix our problems.
 
2013-01-15 08:25:05 PM
Fark Syria
 
2013-01-15 08:30:06 PM
C'est la Vie


or "I demand that all war must stop and pay attention to fashion wear of celebrities!!!!"


See, that works just as well...
 
2013-01-15 08:31:59 PM

red5ish: Carth: The nightly news is between 19 and 22 minutes long. When they talk about the golden globes for 3 minutes and don't mention what is going on in Syria or Pakistan yes there is a problem with news and it deserve ridicule

Good god, what cable service do you subscribe to?


Do cable channels do the nightly news? I thought it was just ABC, CBS and NBC.
 
2013-01-15 08:32:45 PM

styckx: Gonna have to pass on this Onion article.. It's delving way too much into serious political agenda territory.   They're usually good at dancing around this sort of thing and making it all about a cheap laugh.  This just sucks.


The Onion has been doing commentary about people's fixation on pop culture since the beginning. This one came out right after 9/11.

http://www.theonion.com/articles/a-shattered-nation-longs-to-care-abo u t-stupid-bull,216/

media.theonion.com

But today's article is about Syria, so, not interested.
 
2013-01-15 08:52:48 PM

Zul the Magnificent: wildcardjack: Needs more side boob

Hey, anybody got the original of that pic?


danielsfunny.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-01-15 08:55:24 PM
Wow.... you mean to tell me that things aside from War are occurring on planet earth, and that people actually take an interest in it? The travesty...
 
2013-01-15 09:55:23 PM

Carth: The nightly news is between 19 and 22 minutes long. When they talk about the golden globes for 3 minutes and don't mention what is going on in Syria or Pakistan yes there is a problem with news and it deserve ridicule


Oh please. When a third of every local newscast is devoted to the Golden Globes instead of sports you'll have a gripe.
 
2013-01-15 10:06:45 PM

Sock Ruh Tease: Zul the Magnificent: wildcardjack: Needs more side boob

Hey, anybody got the original of that pic?

[danielsfunny.files.wordpress.com image 300x400]


hehehehe, nice twist on a classic, hat's off to both of you.
 
2013-01-15 10:11:21 PM
Young Sally Field - yes, please!

i.imgur.com
 
2013-01-15 10:37:08 PM
Princess Di is wearing a new dress.

/obscure?
 
2013-01-15 10:39:27 PM
Don't get too preachy, Onion. That's available everywhere already!
 
2013-01-15 10:44:52 PM

T.rex: Wow.... you mean to tell me that things aside from War are occurring on planet earth, and that people actually take an interest in it? The travesty...


Yeah, I'm forced to say this. Some terrible things happen in this world, but they do not invalidate the non-terrible things that also happen from time to time. The world is not, and should not be portrayed as, one giant scream.
 
2013-01-15 10:59:15 PM
Looks like quite a few Farkers ITT are getting their panties in a bunch over a silly little Onion article. Must have hit a little bit close to home.

/first world problems
 
2013-01-15 10:59:53 PM

Brick-House: I don't even know how this made the list. The red head piece totally clashes with and defeats the purpose of the overall Camo theme. The judges must have had a gun to their head to include this.

[o.onionstatic.com image 850x477]


My god. I know daewoo makes some crappy stuff but that kid went over the line to show his displeasure at their quality controls.
 
2013-01-15 11:32:31 PM

Glockenspiel Hero: styckx: Gonna have to pass on this Onion article.. It's delving way too much into serious political agenda territory.   They're usually good at dancing around this sort of thing and making it all about a cheap laugh.  This just sucks.

The Onion has been trending that way for quite a while. I think the major problem is that it's honestly hard to separate some of their headlines from the more bizarre things coming out of Washington these days. Other headlines ("2012 Was Once Considered Hottest Year On Record, Man In 2024 Remembers Wistfully" and "Gorilla Sales Skyrocket After Latest Gorilla Attack" come to mind) are such perfect mirrors of what's going on they almost aren't satire anymore, much like the Daily Show has become the best news program out there despite the high fart joke percentage.

Today's "Ten Percent Of U.S. High School Students Graduating Without Basic Object Permanence Skills" story is farking brilliant however.


So, basically, it's going the Daily Show route post-Kilborn
 
2013-01-15 11:49:04 PM
I bet someone at The Onion listens to Depeche Mode. They've got a song on their Black Celebration album with pretty much the exact same idea, titled New Dress. The lyrics are a bit dated, though, referring to news of Princess Di wearing a new dress.
 
2013-01-15 11:53:17 PM

Jackpot777: Princess Di is wearing a new dress.

/obscure?


Huh, how did I miss this comment?

Oh yeah, the picture of young Sally Field above it. I had no idea she was a blond.
 
2013-01-15 11:58:17 PM

Brick-House: I don't even know how this made the list. The red head piece totally clashes with and defeats the purpose of the overall Camo theme. The judges must have had a gun to their head to include this.

[o.onionstatic.com image 850x477]


He still looks better than Lena Dunham.
 
2013-01-16 12:11:43 AM

Popcorn Johnny: I don't get it.


That's right. You don't get it.
 
2013-01-16 12:39:05 AM

I Like Bread: red5ish: Carth: The nightly news is between 19 and 22 minutes long. When they talk about the golden globes for 3 minutes and don't mention what is going on in Syria or Pakistan yes there is a problem with news and it deserve ridicule

Good god, what cable service do you subscribe to?

None?
/not everyone needs 500 channels


Only 500 channels? Good god, what cable service...oh, none?
Good god, what reality TV show has trapped you in a house without cable?
 
2013-01-16 01:24:43 AM

TalenLee: elvindeath: Don't worry - at the rate we're racing to throw away everything that's made America safe and prosperous, we'll be looking like those slides before long.

I wonder if America ever did have international goodwill, or we all just feared you more than we hated you.


Eh, there were about 6 months after WWII when the Europeans felt grateful for american efforts. Before and after that america has been a nation that all others pretend to tolerate.

Granted, all those nations are filled with assholes.
 
2013-01-16 01:28:21 AM
 
2013-01-16 01:59:58 AM
Obvious, clunky and juvenile.
 
2013-01-16 06:09:58 AM
Strangely enough, this stuff would be funnier if it wasn't under an Onion URL.
I think they should change the layout for articles and link to them with bit.ly.
 
2013-01-16 08:42:54 AM
There must be someone older helming the Onion or a young kid that read a lot of his brother's zines and Re/Search.
 
2013-01-16 11:45:29 AM
So writing and posting juvenile parodies is an ok way to spend time but looking at pictures from the Golden globes is not. Good to know.
 
2013-01-16 01:05:54 PM
Yes, way too heavy-handed. I'm choosing to give them the benefit of the doubt and assume part of the joke is along the lines of their "we are a serious newspaper that is just ridiculously incompetent" premise, Zweibel-style. Meaning, part of the joke is that some incompetent staffer posted the wrong pics for the wrong slide-show. And yeah, that's being generous on my part, I realize.
 
2013-01-16 01:55:18 PM

meddleRPI: Because it is impossible to simultaneously be interested in fashion and world events at the same time. Our minds are too simple to process more than one thing, so it is our duty to focus only on the most terrible.


That's right. When I told people I volunteered at an animal shelter, they'd screech about how I should spend my time on their personal issue, which they had no time to volunteer for but thought I did.
 
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