FARK.com: (7536413) TV's James Kirk went where no man has gone before. Lynnwood's James Kirk led police on a bicycle chase wearing nothing but a helmet

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		TV's James Kirk went where no man has gone before. Lynnwood's James Kirk led police on a bicycle chase wearing nothing but a helmet (heraldnet.com)		35
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2648 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Jan 2013 at 1:20 PM | Favorite | share:

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35 Comments (+0 »)

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Ghastly		2013-01-15 12:50:07 PM

Oh for fark's sake J.J. Abrams, stop making Star Trek suck.

NowhereMon		2013-01-15 12:51:26 PM

Safety first!

MaudlinMutantMollusk		2013-01-15 12:59:22 PM

In Washington?

/to coldly go where no man has gone before

Jument		2013-01-15 01:22:40 PM

I'm not sure you want to survive that head injury if your entire body is one big road rash.

lakrfool		2013-01-15 01:26:39 PM

Going boldly,/i>

blatz514		2013-01-15 01:26:59 PM

James E. Kirk was clad only in a bike helmet during the fracas that led to his conviction on burglary and robbery charges.

Oh shiat, there was a fracas.

blatz514		2013-01-15 01:27:37 PM

lakrfool: Going boldly,/i>

Nope, your first one nailed it.

stupiddream		2013-01-15 01:28:35 PM

Jument: I'm not sure you want to survive that head injury if your entire body is one big road rash.

Ugh! I got a bad drop of adrenaline just thinking about that. Any road rash sux!

walrusonion		2013-01-15 01:31:05 PM

SAB-O-TAGE!

/You say "sabotage," I say "Sabataage"

//seriously, most useless scene in a movie ever. JJ to the Studio; "We have to show the audience Kirk is a bad-ass, before the scene where we show the audience Kirk is a bad-ass."

strangeluck		2013-01-15 01:32:50 PM

He committed assault and battery with a pillow...

I've always heard there were serious consequences from felony pillow fights. Just didn't believe it until now.

zerkalo		2013-01-15 01:37:29 PM

Did T.J. Hooker make the arrest?

MBooda		2013-01-15 01:39:09 PM

He khaaaaaaaan't be sirius.

lakrfool		2013-01-15 01:41:12 PM

zerkalo: Did T.J. Hooker make the arrest?

After he rode on the handlebars for 15 blocks trying to commandeer the bicycle.

/Then Adrian Zmed showed up 30 seconds after the fact

probesport		2013-01-15 01:41:30 PM

Prof. Frink		2013-01-15 01:47:26 PM

Where was he wearing it?

GRCooper		2013-01-15 01:47:29 PM

Trying to think of a Kobiashi Maru joke ....

Fark Rye For Many Whores		2013-01-15 01:52:15 PM

James Emperor Kirk

Boy Shatner's ego doesn't stop does it.

fc03.deviantart.net

theorellior		2013-01-15 01:52:31 PM

blatz514: Oh shiat, there was a fracas.

At least there wasn't a donnybrook or a rumpus.

theorellior		2013-01-15 01:53:41 PM

walrusonion: //seriously, most useless scene in a movie ever. JJ to the Studio; "We have to show the audience Kirk is a bad-ass, before the scene where we show the audience Kirk is a bad-ass."

Set in notoriously canyon-filled Iowa, no less.

WelldeadLink		2013-01-15 02:01:04 PM

Was it a Travelocycle?

Guuberre		2013-01-15 02:16:10 PM

Does his bike have a banana seat?

Day_Old_Dutchie		2013-01-15 02:24:06 PM

Eventually Kirk ditched the bike and broke into a house, where a woman was home alone. Kirk demanded clothes. He also threatened to kill the woman if she gave him trouble. The woman told police Kirk forced her into a guest bedroom, pushed her onto a bed and hit her with a pillow.

Did he have the stuffing all down one end?

img441.imageshack.us

Grand PBUH		2013-01-15 02:31:17 PM

I'm sorry Mr Kirk,
You better come down to the station house,
Your son is dead

walrusonion		2013-01-15 02:40:36 PM

theorellior: walrusonion: //seriously, most useless scene in a movie ever. JJ to the Studio; "We have to show the audience Kirk is a bad-ass, before the scene where we show the audience Kirk is a bad-ass."

Set in notoriously canyon-filled Iowa, no less.

puh-leeze son, Iowa is sooo full of canyons and chasms.

HoskerDude		2013-01-15 02:50:09 PM

Lynnwood girls are easy, although they tend to use way too much hair spray.

....am I right, or am I right...

ows		2013-01-15 02:50:30 PM

on his head?

little head?

safety first you know.

borg		2013-01-15 03:31:43 PM

Best bike chase scene ever starts about a minute in.

das_klaun		2013-01-15 03:38:29 PM

And FTR, Lynnwood is a suburb of Tacoma, the city that needs its own Fark tag.

Forbidden Doughnut		2013-01-15 05:30:28 PM

das_klaun: And FTR, Lynnwood is a suburb of Tacoma, the city that needs its own Fark tag.

I think Vancouver,WA has Tacoma beat, hands down, in that category...

/ may have to move back up there for work
// not getting a kick...etc...

rattchett		2013-01-15 06:51:52 PM

Was the helmet purple?

Mugato		2013-01-15 06:55:00 PM

Ghastly: Oh for fark's sake J.J. Abrams, stop making Star Trek suck.

I wouldn't say it sucked. It did have high production values and even though some of the characters were caricatures of their originals and there were plot holes almost as huge as those in "Generations"....oh, you weren't talking about that. Nevermind.

TastyEloi		2013-01-15 07:14:59 PM

The article states the guy is 50 years old. Good Lord, that must suck--he must have been taking crap for his name since he was ten years old. If I'd spent my whole life dealing with that, riding around on a bike naked would probably be the least of my problems.

I'd like to think no one after the mid-seventies would name their kid James Kirk, but I'm sure that's not the case.