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(Fox 40 Sacramento)   Don't bite the dentist, and other important rules from a child's actual rule book   (fox40.com ) divider line
    More: Cool, Citrus Heights, dentists, snacks  
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4023 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Jan 2013 at 12:07 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



23 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-01-15 12:09:23 PM  
Don't paint your sister.
 
2013-01-15 12:11:37 PM  
Arts and crafts must be done when supervised by an adult...

www.dailyhaggis.com
 
2013-01-15 12:14:01 PM  
Don't raise an anti-dentite child.
 
2013-01-15 12:14:48 PM  
Years later, the child changed his name to Skippy and joined the military.

/obscure?
 
2013-01-15 12:22:12 PM  
"No saying "ew" when someone farts."
That is epic.
 
2013-01-15 12:24:03 PM  

Millennium: Years later, the child changed his name to Skippy and joined the military.

/obscure?


Nope.
 
2013-01-15 12:25:17 PM  
Pick up your feet. Take it like a man. Be nice to your sister. Don't mix beer and wine, ever. Oh yeah: Don't drive on the railroad track.
 
2013-01-15 12:25:17 PM  
You know who else had a big book of rules???...
 
2013-01-15 12:27:04 PM  
www.danhausertrek.com

Also approves (link)
 
2013-01-15 12:32:30 PM  
Don't stick your finger up a cat's butthole. They don't like that and will claw you.

Seriously. don't do it. Had a friend's kid do that and after the crying died down and we made sure the kid was ok, we all laughed. The cat never was in the same room with that kid again.
 
2013-01-15 12:33:53 PM  

dv-ous: [www.danhausertrek.com image 239x324]

Also approves (link)


When did Lefler become a Lieutenant? I thought she was an Ensign.
 
2013-01-15 12:45:51 PM  
Never snicker at the judge

Never look the queen up and down and say "How much?"
 
2013-01-15 12:45:52 PM  
I bit the dentist
But I didn't bite no dental aide, oh no!
 
2013-01-15 12:52:54 PM  
When I was 9 my dentist was going to give me a shot. I hit his hand away and the needle went into his other hand. All numbed up, yelling at my father to get that little b**tard out of here was somehow poetic justice to my preteen brain. Poor guy had to cancel all of his Saturday appointments because I was first up. He didn't give me a rule book!
 
2013-01-15 12:58:15 PM  
As a kid, I had a small mouth I guess. And didn't get that you had to brush the top AND back of your teeth (seriously, just brushed the front, I was an idiot. An even bigger one). So lots of dentist time with the family dentist.

Mom took me to a place that 'specialized' in kids once. Despite our warnings they gassed me (makes me violently projectile vomit, I have big stickers and stamps on charts), which sucked, and then the dock used these mouth jacks to crank my mouth open and keep me from biting.

We never went back there, even if he DID have complimentary sore throat cream he applied from a tube. Must have been in the freezer or something, he sure did have to rub the applicator a lot.
 
2013-01-15 01:09:54 PM  
Don't tug on Superman's cape. Don't spit into the wind. Don't pull the mask off that old Lone Ranger.

And don't mess around with Jim Slim.
 
2013-01-15 01:10:43 PM  

lawsucks: When I was 9 my dentist was going to give me a shot. I hit his hand away and the needle went into his other hand. All numbed up, yelling at my father to get that little b**tard out of here was somehow poetic justice to my preteen brain. Poor guy had to cancel all of his Saturday appointments because I was first up. He didn't give me a rule book!


Tim Conway handled it much better that this jerk.
 
2013-01-15 02:20:16 PM  
I did bite my childhood dentist. Also puked on him once. I considered it a victory on my part. He had crappy toys in the Treasure Chest.

It took me years to get over my fear of the dentist. I needed gas and Xanax just to get a cleaning when i was a teenager. Now, it's no big whoop. I have a great dentist now and actually enjoy getting a cleaning.
 
2013-01-15 03:09:33 PM  
It probably belonged to some Autistic kid. When I was teaching special education it was standard equipment for many tards. Like an owner's manual as it were.

We used a lot of PECs too (these were our picture words for the non-reader/non-verbal tards.


Most of the time the kids would just eat their books though.
 
2013-01-15 03:59:17 PM  
George Washington approves.

"Let your Countenance be pleasant but in Serious Matters Somewhat grave." "Wear not your Cloths, foul, unript or Dusty." "When Another speaks be attentive your Self." "Reprehend not the imperfections of others for that belongs to Parents Masters and Superiours." In 1747, an eager and ambitious George Washington, at the green age of fifteen, was already concentrating on making his way in the world. Meticulously, he copied a list of 110 exacting rules of conduct and civility from the English translation of a French seventeenth-century manual on good manners, the equivalent of a modern self-help book, a kind of How to Be a Gentleman in One Hundred and Ten Easy Lessons.

http://www.commandposts.com/2011/02/george-washington/
 
2013-01-15 04:12:27 PM  

ReverendJynxed: It probably belonged to some Autistic kid. When I was teaching special education it was standard equipment for many tards. Like an owner's manual as it were.

We used a lot of PECs too (these were our picture words for the non-reader/non-verbal tards.


Most of the time the kids would just eat their books though


DIAF
 
2013-01-15 08:40:22 PM  

kaylward: ReverendJynxed: It probably belonged to some Autistic kid. When I was teaching special education it was standard equipment for many tards. Like an owner's manual as it were.

We used a lot of PECs too (these were our picture words for the non-reader/non-verbal tards.


Most of the time the kids would just eat their books though

DIAF


Seconded
 
2013-01-16 01:11:47 AM  

Archimedes' Principal: Don't tug on Superman's cape. Don't spit into the wind. Don't pull the mask off that old Lone Ranger.

And don't mess around with Jim Slim.


Timmy goes in front of the class to read the class his assignment. Tell us a family story with a moral. Timmy starts. This is a story about my uncle jack. He was a pilot in WWII on the pacific. One day he got shot down and had to jump out of the plane. One the way down he pulled a whiskey bottle out of his bag and drank half of it. Well then he landed in the jungle on top of a crocodile. He killed it with his bare hands. Then the Japs showed up and started shooting at him. Uncle Jack pulled out his machine gun and shot them all. Then more Japs showed up and uncle Jack was out of ammo. So he went after them with his knife and killed most of them until his knife broke. He strangled the last two one in each hand. The end.

The teacher blanching says, what.. what is the moral of that story Timmy. Timmy says... Oh! Never fark with Uncle Jack when he drunk.
 
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