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22859 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Jan 2013 at 8:07 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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Archived thread
2013-01-14 08:14:42 PM
13 votes:
So he:

1) cheated.
2) covered up that he cheated.
3) lied about cheating.
4) lied about covering up that he cheated.
5) Got caught.
6) Continued to lie.
7) Got caught again.
8) Realized he couldn't lie his way out of it.
9) Got banned and expunged from the record books, so he had nothing left to lose.
10) Decided to admit to everything in a final cash grab.

Do I have that right?  One hell of a ten step program there, Mr. Armstrong.
2013-01-14 08:10:14 PM
6 votes:
Well, if everyone else was doping too, then whatever because he still won.
2013-01-14 08:19:17 PM
5 votes:

The Muthaship: Warthog: So he:

1) cheated.
2) covered up that he cheated.
3) lied about cheating.
4) lied about covering up that he cheated.
5) Got caught.
6) Continued to lie.
7) Got caught again.
8) Realized he couldn't lie his way out of it.
9) Got banned and expunged from the record books, so he had nothing left to lose.
10) Decided to admit to everything in a final cash grab.

Do I have that right?  One hell of a ten step program there, Mr. Armstrong.

You left out that he received money from people he sued because they said he cheated when he was cheating, but lied well enough in court to convince the jury that his accusers were lying, and he's keeping the money.


Shoot, you're right.   I hereby nominate Lance Armstrong as Biggest Douche in the History of Sports.  Anyone have someone to one-up him?
2013-01-14 08:08:04 PM
4 votes:
When are they going to realize that no one cares?
2013-01-15 11:34:16 AM
3 votes:
You should be thanking Lance Armstrong and Livestrong. Most of you wouldn't even know about cancer had it not been for his foundation raising awareness of cancer. So what if they didn't raise money for treatment, research, or prevention. That pales in comparison to raising awareness that cancer exists. Before Lance it was often debated like global warming or Jesus. But Lance proved cancer was real and could be defeated! Livestrong!
2013-01-14 08:26:51 PM
3 votes:
1.bp.blogspot.com

Of course, everyone else did it too, and he still won, so that's something.
2013-01-14 08:16:45 PM
3 votes:

Warthog: So he:

1) cheated.
2) covered up that he cheated.
3) lied about cheating.
4) lied about covering up that he cheated.
5) Got caught.
6) Continued to lie.
7) Got caught again.
8) Realized he couldn't lie his way out of it.
9) Got banned and expunged from the record books, so he had nothing left to lose.
10) Decided to admit to everything in a final cash grab.

Do I have that right?  One hell of a ten step program there, Mr. Armstrong.


You left out that he received money from people he sued because they said he cheated when he was cheating, but lied well enough in court to convince the jury that his accusers were lying, and he's keeping the money.
2013-01-14 08:12:28 PM
3 votes:
I'm sure I'll be overwhelmed with apologies from everyone who argued vehemently (sometimes violently) that he was clean... any minute now... annnny minnnute now....

/ you just can't lose one or more nuts and maintain a world-class athlete's physique without exogenous hormone manipulation
2013-01-14 08:08:19 PM
3 votes:
That took some ball to admit.
2013-01-14 09:26:02 PM
2 votes:

chumboobler: He did all that. I will not deny it. He will no longer deny it. His foundation has helped thousands of people. Do good deeds that bring a greater good not outdo a failure of the past? In spite of what the outcome now may be, for years his story has inspired many with cancer to fight. It has given hope to many. Yes he cheated to win at an ultra high level sporting event multiple times. That was wrong. Denying it was also wrong. The level of good his foundation has done should not be forgotten. His fame was based on cheating but he used that fame in the right way. He helped people with it. He helped himself too but he has helped thousands of cancer sufferers and their families. That should not be forgotten. Overall the effect has been a positive one for many many people. To deny that is not right.


Rob a bank, create a lucrative human trafficking, prostitution and drug ring with the funds, take your earnings and donate half of them to St. Jude's, and keep the other half and retire a millionaire. Yeah those first two things were bad, but look at the awesome cancer research being done with your illicit gains! Don't forget that! To deny that is not right. Not right, I tell you! Wear your Cheatstrong rubber band with pride.
2013-01-14 08:52:58 PM
2 votes:

After all this time, after he already got away with it, why the fark would he admit it now? Farking moran, if you're going to cheat, the at least be consistent about it.


xtupload.com

"Admitting he cheated at this point is like the Duke of Wellington admitting on his deathbed that he was going to lose to Napoleon at the Battle of Waterloo and the only reason he won was because he had the Prussian 4th corps to outflank General Lobau at Frichermont thus turning the tide of the whole battle and saving his ass."
2013-01-14 08:39:32 PM
2 votes:

thisispete: Palmer Eldritch: I've seen this question asked in several Lance threads, but I don't know if it ever got answered- does this expose him to legal action from the people he successfully sued for calling him a doper?

He certainly could face perjury charges after testifying in 2005 that he didn't dope.


Maybe not.  I'll preface this by saying I'm not admitted to practice in Texas, and that I know fark-all about Texas state law, but three minutes on the Google machine suggests that the statute of limitations in Texas for perjury may be somewhere between 2 and 5 years depending on how they classify the offense.  The testimony he gave was in 2005.  It's now 2013.

There are tolling theories and arguments about continuing to cover up a crime that sometimes may extend a statute of limitations, but my guess is he paid a lot of money to a lawyer to confirm for him that he's not going to jail for opening his mouth on Oprah before he did it.
2013-01-14 08:24:55 PM
2 votes:
The only reason he admitted it is because he wants to compete in some triathlons. He cannot compete unless the ban was lifted. This will only happen if he admits. I hope he gets a lot of money, because a ton of organizations and companies will sue him to the stone age.
2013-01-14 08:24:41 PM
2 votes:

cryinoutloud: I don't know, I'm kind of in the "well, if everybody doped, then he was still the best" camp.


Nah, cheating obviates any achievement. If two guys are racing and one guy skips 25% of the course and the other skips 50%, you don't award the guy who skipped 50% because he finished faster. You just give everyone a big fat DQ, and if anyone finished legitimately, they're the ones who won.

The sad thing is, there are probably entire decades where the actual winner of the Tour De France doesn't even know they won, because they're buried back in the 30th place or something behind a bunch of cheaters. Hell, they might not even be a professional cyclist.
2013-01-14 08:13:02 PM
2 votes:
And the number of f*cks given haven't changed.
2013-01-14 08:12:57 PM
2 votes:
I bet it comes out like him bragging about running 'the most sophisticated doping operation in the history of the sport".
2013-01-14 08:11:34 PM
2 votes:
The truth shall set you free.

Morpheus 1999
2013-01-14 08:09:48 PM
2 votes:

the_foo: When are they going to realize that no one cares?


When people stop taking the time to post how little they care in online discussion threads about it.
2013-01-14 08:09:17 PM
2 votes:
Otherwise known as every professional cyclist for at least the last 40 years....
2013-01-14 08:08:48 PM
2 votes:
Obvious tag busy getting a transfusion?
2013-01-15 12:09:17 PM
1 votes:
The man is a classic psychopath: Ruthless, doesn't care about social norms or morals, and is willing to use other peoples' willingness to believe in peoples' adherence to ethical behaviour as an edge.
2013-01-15 10:37:11 AM
1 votes:

Verzio: Postulate for a moment that he's innocent, and was banned unjustly. Just for a minute. He can't go back in time and give additional samples to test, right? If he's innocent, there's no actual way he can prove it, right? No matter how loudly he proclaims his innocence, he's stuck.

But, he wants to participate in triathlons. Which means he needs to get unbanned.

Well, the only way he can get unbanned is by making an apology. ...


Because integrity. I think that that's what's gotten me down in the last ten years or so -- people everywhere (particularly business leaders and politicians) seem to become outraged about the smallest things, but even then don't feel the need to display personal integrity themselves. If he was innocent, he should not say he was guilty just to be able to participate in triathlons. Admitting to that without being guilty would also show integrity.

He's a scumbag, and it's really great that he started a seeminglly effective charity, but in no way can that make up for the things he took that he didn't deserve. People look up to public figures, particularly those in sports, and his fans have to deal with having looked up to someone who turns out to be just another lying scumbag. Great -- contribute all of your ill-gotten gains and use your undeserved celebrity to convince others to contribute. Of course, now you've got hundreds of thousands of people who've worn stupid yellow bracelets for years as a badge that they looked up to a liar.

Fark him.
2013-01-15 09:33:17 AM
1 votes:
After the Barry Bond and Sammy Sosa thing,  I never watched baseball again.  But I learned my lesson :P
This, doesn't surprise me.  In fact, we all expected it.  Phelps is next.  If he's smart he'll "Retire" early before they start questioning him too much.
2013-01-15 04:23:19 AM
1 votes:
As a non-car-owning cyclist with tens of thousands on miles on the clock, professional cycling was one of the few sports I followed. Like sailing, which I also do, technological advances in cycling end up on the street, and the (clearly apparent) purity of seeing humans work a relatively simple machine to ascend mountains and maintain high speeds on the flats was inspiring to me.

Doping has pretty well killed that for me over the last 15 years or so, and Armstrong and his cowardly denials are at the front of that funeral march. Not to Godwin this up, but knowing that the good his cancer charity did was built on his artificially and duplictious achievements in sport, any excuse-making for his consistent betrayals sounds like "but Hitler liked dogs and built the Autobahn".

It entirely misses the point. I don't believe his admissions of doping are any more complete and accurate than his denials of doping were.

Bah. I hope the remaining nut falls off.
2013-01-15 01:04:36 AM
1 votes:

fatalvenom: whatshisname: fatalvenom: Hell, who gives 1/64th of a shiat about these idiots PERIOD?!?!!??

Watch the Tour de France next July.
There's more to life on Earth than what happens in the US.

It doesnt matter where it takes place. Road bike scum are one of the biggest piece of shiat demographics of human beings.

Get on one of these:



Get the fark off my roads. You twinks on your bikes dont pay taxes and licensing fees to use my roadways.

Go find a cock and somewhere else to ride and not piss off everyone else because you just happen to be a douchebag.


My bike doesn't tear up your roadways. And I drive, thus I do pay for them. Please step out of your vehicle and squat on a brat, dickbag.
2013-01-14 11:54:13 PM
1 votes:
Perhaps his performance-enhancing drugs caused the cancer.
2013-01-14 11:38:56 PM
1 votes:

whatshisname: Nothing To See Here: fatalvenom: hbk72777: So what?

There isn't a 100% clean sport today.


WNBA?

DMSO

Championship Darts?
Or is beer considered doping?


Not at all. Any sport where you can drink beer and calm your hand to make you a better athlete is pretty damn sweet.

/ I wish drinking vodka and banging chicks 15lbs overweight would be considered a sport.
2013-01-14 11:16:14 PM
1 votes:

whatshisname: fatalvenom: Hell, who gives 1/64th of a shiat about these idiots PERIOD?!?!!??

Watch the Tour de France next July.
There's more to life on Earth than what happens in the US.


It doesnt matter where it takes place. Road bike scum are one of the biggest piece of shiat demographics of human beings.

Get on one of these:

i1045.photobucket.com

Get the fark off my roads. You twinks on your bikes dont pay taxes and licensing fees to use my roadways.

Go find a cock and somewhere else to ride and not piss off everyone else because you just happen to be a douchebag.
2013-01-14 10:05:57 PM
1 votes:

HMS_Blinkin: Otherwise known as every professional cyclist for at least the last 40 years....


The cyclists not doping were called "bread and water" cyclists.  They had a name for them.  If a "bread and water" cyclist came 32nd in a race ahead of the other cyclists not doping, they were the best racer that day IMHO.
2013-01-14 09:54:35 PM
1 votes:

GAT_00: So what are all those people who claimed he was being persecuted for doing nothing wrong going to be saying?


That he was persecuted for doing nothing wrong. His violations were mere malum prohibitum, not malum in se. We should just acknowledge PEDs are going to be used and move on like adults, instead of playing "Gotcha!" games like toddlers.
2013-01-14 09:42:17 PM
1 votes:
According to the article, the cancer spread to his BRAINS...wait wut?
2013-01-14 09:31:27 PM
1 votes:
As a (former) fan, I was actually more outraged at him walking out on his family.
2013-01-14 09:18:36 PM
1 votes:

Warthog: Shoot, you're right.   I hereby nominate Lance Armstrong as Biggest Douche in the History of Sports.  Anyone have someone to one-up him?


Sandusky

/if we are comparing self delusional states here...
2013-01-14 09:16:54 PM
1 votes:
How many people were making sh*tloads of money because of his success? That's what leads to "passed" drug tests.
2013-01-14 08:57:23 PM
1 votes:
Who cares. We all knew cyclists were assholes already.
2013-01-14 08:46:16 PM
1 votes:
Stupid Roadies. . . Ned Overend and Hans Rey are my cycling heroes!
2013-01-14 08:40:28 PM
1 votes:

error 303: shiatty athlete and it sucks his charity will be harmed by this.

That is all.


I wouldn't say he's a shiatty athlete. He won the Tour de France 7 consecutive times against other athletes who were also doping. He was the dominant doper.

Is cheating really cheating if everyone's doing it?
2013-01-14 08:37:16 PM
1 votes:

cryinoutloud: I don't know, I'm kind of in the "well, if everybody doped, then he was still the best" camp.

I don't care much either way, though. It's sports. Very lucrative sports, but still just a game.


I get what you're saying, but when you play in a sport, you agree to the rules of the game. If you refuse to play by the rules, whatever the reason, you're just a lousy sport. Your victories are lies, and you don't deserve to be propped up as a role model. "Everyone else is doing it" is a lame excuse.
2013-01-14 08:25:09 PM
1 votes:

Palmer Eldritch: I've seen this question asked in several Lance threads, but I don't know if it ever got answered- does this expose him to legal action from the people he successfully sued for calling him a doper?


He certainly could face perjury charges after testifying in 2005 that he didn't dope.
2013-01-14 08:25:07 PM
1 votes:
Sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you dope.
2013-01-14 08:24:32 PM
1 votes:

velvet_fog: Solid State Vittles: Oprah probably forced him to eat some more Crow.

If the Marion Jones interview serves as precedent, I wouldn't count on it. Oprah is a softball interview, which is why Lance went with her instead of a reputable TV journalist on 60 Minutes, Dateline, 20/20, or the like.


I thought mitter was more angling for this?

cache.deadspin.com
/Thatsthejoke.jpg??
2013-01-14 08:23:21 PM
1 votes:
I've seen this question asked in several Lance threads, but I don't know if it ever got answered- does this expose him to legal action from the people he successfully sued for calling him a doper?
2013-01-14 08:21:19 PM
1 votes:
images4.wikia.nocookie.net
2013-01-14 08:20:38 PM
1 votes:

HMS_Blinkin: Otherwise known as every professional cyclist for at least the last 40 years....


This. Lance just got caught.
2013-01-14 08:19:43 PM
1 votes:
i dont care. its the pinnacle of bicycle racing, they all cheat, and so what. what Armstrong accomplished is still an amazing feat. as far as im concerned he still won all those Tour De Frances and Reggie Bush still won the Heisman. i think we've gone over the bend with trying to rewrite sports history. Also.. just to throw this in.. yeah ill say it.. the Sosa McGwire homerun battle was the best thing ever in baseball.
2013-01-14 08:16:12 PM
1 votes:
No one cares that he doped? There are probably some companies that are going to sue the shiat of him (or already in the process).
2013-01-14 08:15:59 PM
1 votes:

theorellior: So can we finally tell this 24kt attention whore to STFU and GBTW now that he's finally confirmed what everyone already knew? Geeze, you lose a testicle and win seven Tours against a field of dopers and you expect us to believe you're clean. Riiiiiiight.


I don't know, I'm kind of in the "well, if everybody doped, then he was still the best" camp.

I don't care much either way, though. It's sports. Very lucrative sports, but still just a game.
2013-01-14 08:11:24 PM
1 votes:
Newsflash? We all knew, long before he admitted it. Can this farker just go away already?
2013-01-14 08:11:21 PM
1 votes:
Don't care, never did.
2013-01-14 08:09:44 PM
1 votes:
So? Its not like they can take away his moon landing.
 
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