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22858 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Jan 2013 at 8:07 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-01-14 08:08:04 PM
When are they going to realize that no one cares?
 
2013-01-14 08:08:19 PM
That took some ball to admit.
 
2013-01-14 08:08:22 PM
NSS!
 
2013-01-14 08:08:42 PM
Well, no shiat.
 
2013-01-14 08:08:48 PM
Obvious tag busy getting a transfusion?
 
2013-01-14 08:09:17 PM
Otherwise known as every professional cyclist for at least the last 40 years....
 
2013-01-14 08:09:25 PM
Apparently he'd give his left nut to win the Tour De France.
 
2013-01-14 08:09:44 PM
So? Its not like they can take away his moon landing.
 
2013-01-14 08:09:48 PM

the_foo: When are they going to realize that no one cares?


When people stop taking the time to post how little they care in online discussion threads about it.
 
2013-01-14 08:10:14 PM
Well, if everyone else was doping too, then whatever because he still won.
 
2013-01-14 08:10:27 PM
So can we finally tell this 24kt attention whore to STFU and GBTW now that he's finally confirmed what everyone already knew? Geeze, you lose a testicle and win seven Tours against a field of dopers and you expect us to believe you're clean. Riiiiiiight.
 
2013-01-14 08:10:53 PM

the_foo: When are they going to realize that no one cares?


This thread will completely fill up with excuses for the guy, so people do care.
 
2013-01-14 08:11:02 PM

the_foo: When are they going to realize that no one cares?


Never.
 
2013-01-14 08:11:21 PM
Don't care, never did.
 
2013-01-14 08:11:24 PM
Newsflash? We all knew, long before he admitted it. Can this farker just go away already?
 
2013-01-14 08:11:34 PM
The truth shall set you free.

Morpheus 1999
 
2013-01-14 08:12:10 PM
Oprah probably forced him to eat some more Crow.
 
2013-01-14 08:12:28 PM
I'm sure I'll be overwhelmed with apologies from everyone who argued vehemently (sometimes violently) that he was clean... any minute now... annnny minnnute now....

/ you just can't lose one or more nuts and maintain a world-class athlete's physique without exogenous hormone manipulation
 
2013-01-14 08:12:57 PM
I bet it comes out like him bragging about running 'the most sophisticated doping operation in the history of the sport".
 
2013-01-14 08:12:59 PM
No way! Next you're going to tell me Barry Bonds is on steroids!!
 
2013-01-14 08:13:02 PM
And the number of f*cks given haven't changed.
 
2013-01-14 08:14:28 PM

the_foo: When are they going to realize that no one cares?


I wonder what would be a good way to use farkcode to mangle that phrase?
 
2013-01-14 08:14:42 PM
So he:

1) cheated.
2) covered up that he cheated.
3) lied about cheating.
4) lied about covering up that he cheated.
5) Got caught.
6) Continued to lie.
7) Got caught again.
8) Realized he couldn't lie his way out of it.
9) Got banned and expunged from the record books, so he had nothing left to lose.
10) Decided to admit to everything in a final cash grab.

Do I have that right?  One hell of a ten step program there, Mr. Armstrong.
 
2013-01-14 08:15:04 PM

LessO2: That took some ball to admit.


I guess we're done here. Well played.
 
2013-01-14 08:15:06 PM

CokeBear: So? Its not like they can take away his moon landing.


Wrong Armstrong.  The guy who landed on the moon was Louis.
 
2013-01-14 08:15:07 PM

StormChaser: No way! Next you're going to tell me Barry Bonds is on steroids!!


I'm still farking pissed at that motherfarker. I've been a life-long giants fan, watching since the days of Will Clark. I know Bonds wasn't doping when he first got here. He got bigger and bigger but it was so slow that I didn't see it. In 2001 during his record year they had numerous promotional materials touting his "outstanding training and workout regimen". I believed it.

fark you, Barry. I'm glad you're not going to the hall.
 
2013-01-14 08:15:45 PM

aerojockey: CokeBear: So? Its not like they can take away his moon landing.

Wrong Armstrong.  The guy who landed on the moon was Louis.


No that was Apollo Creed.
 
2013-01-14 08:15:59 PM

theorellior: So can we finally tell this 24kt attention whore to STFU and GBTW now that he's finally confirmed what everyone already knew? Geeze, you lose a testicle and win seven Tours against a field of dopers and you expect us to believe you're clean. Riiiiiiight.


I don't know, I'm kind of in the "well, if everybody doped, then he was still the best" camp.

I don't care much either way, though. It's sports. Very lucrative sports, but still just a game.
 
2013-01-14 08:16:12 PM
No one cares that he doped? There are probably some companies that are going to sue the shiat of him (or already in the process).
 
2013-01-14 08:16:16 PM

caknuck: NSS!

 
2013-01-14 08:16:35 PM

Warthog: So he:

1) cheated.
2) covered up that he cheated.
3) lied about cheating.
4) lied about covering up that he cheated.
5) Got caught.
6) Continued to lie.
7) Got caught again.
8) Realized he couldn't lie his way out of it.
9) Got banned and expunged from the record books, so he had nothing left to lose.
10) Decided to admit to everything in a final cash grab.

Do I have that right?  One hell of a ten step program there, Mr. Armstrong.


yeah, thats about right. but nobody cares, because its men in tight pants on bicycles.
 
2013-01-14 08:16:45 PM

Warthog: So he:

1) cheated.
2) covered up that he cheated.
3) lied about cheating.
4) lied about covering up that he cheated.
5) Got caught.
6) Continued to lie.
7) Got caught again.
8) Realized he couldn't lie his way out of it.
9) Got banned and expunged from the record books, so he had nothing left to lose.
10) Decided to admit to everything in a final cash grab.

Do I have that right?  One hell of a ten step program there, Mr. Armstrong.


You left out that he received money from people he sued because they said he cheated when he was cheating, but lied well enough in court to convince the jury that his accusers were lying, and he's keeping the money.
 
2013-01-14 08:16:52 PM

Solid State Vittles: Oprah probably forced him to eat some more Crow.


If the Marion Jones interview serves as precedent, I wouldn't count on it. Oprah is a softball interview, which is why Lance went with her instead of a reputable TV journalist on 60 Minutes, Dateline, 20/20, or the like.
 
2013-01-14 08:17:41 PM
Oh great. Another cyclist with an axe to grind trying to ruin Lance's career. The man never tested positive! Let him have his wins!

/tee-hee
 
2013-01-14 08:18:15 PM

The All-Powerful Atheismo: aerojockey: CokeBear: So? Its not like they can take away his moon landing.

Wrong Armstrong.  The guy who landed on the moon was Louis.

No that was Apollo Creed.


With Buzz Lightyear.
 
2013-01-14 08:18:25 PM

Olympic Trolling Judge: Oh great. Another cyclist with an axe to grind trying to ruin Lance's career. The man never tested positive! Let him have his wins!

/tee-hee


shouldn't you be posting this under your "Cycling Trolling Judge" account?
 
2013-01-14 08:18:27 PM
I blame his father:

collider.com

/hot
 
2013-01-14 08:18:55 PM

The All-Powerful Atheismo: I'm still farking pissed at that motherfarker. I've been a life-long giants fan, watching since the days of Will Clark. I know Bonds wasn't doping when he first got here. He got bigger and bigger but it was so slow that I didn't see it. In 2001 during his record year they had numerous promotional materials touting his "outstanding training and workout regimen". I believed it.
fark you, Barry. I'm glad you're not going to the hall.


Haha, i remember seeing some pictures of him when he started playing baseball, and then pictures of him several years later when he was on steroids. Who did he think he was kidding?? He looked like Popeye.
 
2013-01-14 08:19:17 PM

The Muthaship: Warthog: So he:

1) cheated.
2) covered up that he cheated.
3) lied about cheating.
4) lied about covering up that he cheated.
5) Got caught.
6) Continued to lie.
7) Got caught again.
8) Realized he couldn't lie his way out of it.
9) Got banned and expunged from the record books, so he had nothing left to lose.
10) Decided to admit to everything in a final cash grab.

Do I have that right?  One hell of a ten step program there, Mr. Armstrong.

You left out that he received money from people he sued because they said he cheated when he was cheating, but lied well enough in court to convince the jury that his accusers were lying, and he's keeping the money.


Shoot, you're right.   I hereby nominate Lance Armstrong as Biggest Douche in the History of Sports.  Anyone have someone to one-up him?
 
2013-01-14 08:19:30 PM
collider.com

Available for sponsorship...
 
2013-01-14 08:19:43 PM
i dont care. its the pinnacle of bicycle racing, they all cheat, and so what. what Armstrong accomplished is still an amazing feat. as far as im concerned he still won all those Tour De Frances and Reggie Bush still won the Heisman. i think we've gone over the bend with trying to rewrite sports history. Also.. just to throw this in.. yeah ill say it.. the Sosa McGwire homerun battle was the best thing ever in baseball.
 
2013-01-14 08:20:08 PM

The Muthaship: Warthog: So he:

1) cheated.
2) covered up that he cheated.
3) lied about cheating.
4) lied about covering up that he cheated.
5) Got caught.
6) Continued to lie.
7) Got caught again.
8) Realized he couldn't lie his way out of it.
9) Got banned and expunged from the record books, so he had nothing left to lose.
10) Decided to admit to everything in a final cash grab.

Do I have that right?  One hell of a ten step program there, Mr. Armstrong.

You left out that he received money from people he sued because they said he cheated when he was cheating, but lied well enough in court to convince the jury that his accusers were lying, and he's keeping the money.


Good. No one likes a snitch. It's not like the people that ratted him out were any cleaner than him.

"But HE'S cheating too! Waaaaaaaaaaaaah!
 
2013-01-14 08:20:38 PM

HMS_Blinkin: Otherwise known as every professional cyclist for at least the last 40 years....


This. Lance just got caught.
 
2013-01-14 08:20:53 PM
....yawn.
 
2013-01-14 08:21:08 PM

cryinoutloud: The All-Powerful Atheismo: I'm still farking pissed at that motherfarker. I've been a life-long giants fan, watching since the days of Will Clark. I know Bonds wasn't doping when he first got here. He got bigger and bigger but it was so slow that I didn't see it. In 2001 during his record year they had numerous promotional materials touting his "outstanding training and workout regimen". I believed it.
fark you, Barry. I'm glad you're not going to the hall.

Haha, i remember seeing some pictures of him when he started playing baseball, and then pictures of him several years later when he was on steroids. Who did he think he was kidding?? He looked like Popeye.


What's bullshiat is that the effect was even more noticeable in Sammy Sosa and Mark McGwire and people didn't call them out nearly as much as they did Bonds
 
2013-01-14 08:21:16 PM

SFSailor:
/ you just can't lose one or more nuts and maintain a world-class athlete's physique without exogenous hormone manipulation


How so? I readily admit I have very little knowledge in this topic.
 
2013-01-14 08:21:19 PM
images4.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2013-01-14 08:21:22 PM
 
2013-01-14 08:22:37 PM
It's nice to see that he grew half a pair, and fessed up.
 
2013-01-14 08:23:21 PM
I've seen this question asked in several Lance threads, but I don't know if it ever got answered- does this expose him to legal action from the people he successfully sued for calling him a doper?
 
2013-01-14 08:23:39 PM
Wait a minute! Who cares about cycling?
 
2013-01-14 08:23:59 PM

Shenanigans!: the_foo: When are they going to realize that no one cares?

When people stop taking the time to post how little they care in online discussion threads about it.


I care about how much I have to see it or here about it, notsomuch the subject matter.
 
2013-01-14 08:24:27 PM

wholedamnshow: Good. No one likes a snitch. It's not like the people that ratted him out were any cleaner than him.

"But HE'S cheating too! Waaaaaaaaaaaaah!


The Sunday Times were doping?

Did the even win any races?

/It's nice Lance still has people to go to bat for him.
//You're doing God's work
 
2013-01-14 08:24:32 PM

velvet_fog: Solid State Vittles: Oprah probably forced him to eat some more Crow.

If the Marion Jones interview serves as precedent, I wouldn't count on it. Oprah is a softball interview, which is why Lance went with her instead of a reputable TV journalist on 60 Minutes, Dateline, 20/20, or the like.


I thought mitter was more angling for this?

cache.deadspin.com
/Thatsthejoke.jpg??
 
2013-01-14 08:24:41 PM

cryinoutloud: I don't know, I'm kind of in the "well, if everybody doped, then he was still the best" camp.


Nah, cheating obviates any achievement. If two guys are racing and one guy skips 25% of the course and the other skips 50%, you don't award the guy who skipped 50% because he finished faster. You just give everyone a big fat DQ, and if anyone finished legitimately, they're the ones who won.

The sad thing is, there are probably entire decades where the actual winner of the Tour De France doesn't even know they won, because they're buried back in the 30th place or something behind a bunch of cheaters. Hell, they might not even be a professional cyclist.
 
2013-01-14 08:24:55 PM
The only reason he admitted it is because he wants to compete in some triathlons. He cannot compete unless the ban was lifted. This will only happen if he admits. I hope he gets a lot of money, because a ton of organizations and companies will sue him to the stone age.
 
2013-01-14 08:25:07 PM
Sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you dope.
 
2013-01-14 08:25:09 PM

Palmer Eldritch: I've seen this question asked in several Lance threads, but I don't know if it ever got answered- does this expose him to legal action from the people he successfully sued for calling him a doper?


He certainly could face perjury charges after testifying in 2005 that he didn't dope.
 
2013-01-14 08:26:51 PM
1.bp.blogspot.com

Of course, everyone else did it too, and he still won, so that's something.
 
2013-01-14 08:27:08 PM
Moral of the story....cheaters never lose.
 
2013-01-14 08:27:12 PM

The All-Powerful Atheismo: StormChaser: No way! Next you're going to tell me Barry Bonds is on steroids!!

I'm still farking pissed at that motherfarker. I've been a life-long giants fan, watching since the days of Will Clark. I know Bonds wasn't doping when he first got here. He got bigger and bigger but it was so slow that I didn't see it. In 2001 during his record year they had numerous promotional materials touting his "outstanding training and workout regimen". I believed it.

fark you, Barry. I'm glad you're not going to the hall.


No offense, but there is no way you were paying attention. Same thing with McGwire across the bay. Dudes were literally walking cautionary tales in PED use.
 
2013-01-14 08:27:47 PM
No offense, but there is no way you were paying attention. Same thing with McGwire across the bay. Dudes were literally walking cautionary tales in PED use.
 
2013-01-14 08:28:11 PM

Palmer Eldritch: I've seen this question asked in several Lance threads, but I don't know if it ever got answered- does this expose him to legal action from the people he successfully sued for calling him a doper?


Lots of people and companies have been threatening to sue him. I'm sure some will try. I'd bet on Trek, USPS, Discovery, Landis, and I read something about The Sunday times in London calling for a lawsuit because he sued them for libel a while back and won.

I've seen a lot of livestrong gear for cheap on Craigslist. Nobody, even casual cyclists want shiat to do with him. I got into riding because of the attention he brought to the sport, soon after realized he's a douche and there are plenty of other aspects to cycling than the big names.

If you'll excuse me, I have to stuff both my nuts into some spandex now.
 
2013-01-14 08:29:15 PM
Millions of people are left wondering: where is Oprah's channel?
 
2013-01-14 08:29:19 PM

Zeppelininthesky: The only reason he admitted it is because he wants to compete in some triathlons. He cannot compete unless the ban was lifted. This will only happen if he admits. I hope he gets a lot of money, because a ton of organizations and companies will sue him to the stone age.


This.
 
2013-01-14 08:29:48 PM

MFAWG: The All-Powerful Atheismo: StormChaser: No way! Next you're going to tell me Barry Bonds is on steroids!!

I'm still farking pissed at that motherfarker. I've been a life-long giants fan, watching since the days of Will Clark. I know Bonds wasn't doping when he first got here. He got bigger and bigger but it was so slow that I didn't see it. In 2001 during his record year they had numerous promotional materials touting his "outstanding training and workout regimen". I believed it.

fark you, Barry. I'm glad you're not going to the hall.

No offense, but there is no way you were paying attention. Same thing with McGwire across the bay. Dudes were literally walking cautionary tales in PED use.


Well I was, so eat it. It IS possible to become that big through workout and the right insane diet. Not smart, but it's possible. Anyway my point was that it happened so slowly that I didn't notice.

Additionally, I wasn't able to catch many games on TV for a couple of years.
 
2013-01-14 08:30:29 PM

Olympic Trolling Judge: Oh great. Another cyclist with an axe to grind trying to ruin Lance's career. The man never tested positive! Let him have his wins!

/tee-hee


What is with the /tee-hee? It's a perfectly cromulent point of view.

One can look at the rules in a way that says if I do something in a way that they are not testing for and I pass their tests then I haven't actually broken the rules.

It's a game within a game and a change in the testing is just as much a change in the rules since the goal is to pass the test.

Wait, what does cromulent mean again?
 
2013-01-14 08:30:39 PM

wholedamnshow: Good. No one likes a snitch. It's not like the people that ratted him out were any cleaner than him.

"But HE'S cheating too! Waaaaaaaaaaaaah!


It's like Lonnegan from The Sting: "What was I supposed to do - call him for cheating better than me, in front of the others?"
 
2013-01-14 08:30:42 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aDRzS2qLDhk
 
2013-01-14 08:31:02 PM

ilikeracecars: Millions of people are left wondering: where is Oprah's channel?


Millions are wondering: that fat whore has her own channel?
 
2013-01-14 08:31:05 PM

Warthog: The Muthaship: Warthog: So he:

1) cheated.
2) covered up that he cheated.
3) lied about cheating.
4) lied about covering up that he cheated.
5) Got caught.
6) Continued to lie.
7) Got caught again.
8) Realized he couldn't lie his way out of it.
9) Got banned and expunged from the record books, so he had nothing left to lose.
10) Decided to admit to everything in a final cash grab.

Do I have that right?  One hell of a ten step program there, Mr. Armstrong.

You left out that he received money from people he sued because they said he cheated when he was cheating, but lied well enough in court to convince the jury that his accusers were lying, and he's keeping the money.

Shoot, you're right.   I hereby nominate Lance Armstrong as Biggest Douche in the History of Sports.  Anyone have someone to one-up him?


Michael Jordan, who actually in invited his high school coach to his HoF induction to denigrate that coach for cutting him 30 years ago.
 
2013-01-14 08:31:07 PM
BUT HE NEVER TESTED POSITIVE! THIS IS A WITCH HUNT! CIRCUMSTANTIAL EVIDENCE! HERESAY!


Anyone got the thread from when ADA brought the charges and the Lance nuthuggers were defending him?
 
2013-01-14 08:31:26 PM

Matrix Flavored Wasabi: Shenanigans!: the_foo: When are they going to realize that no one cares?

When people stop taking the time to post how little they care in online discussion threads about it.

I care about how much I have to see it or here about it, notsomuch the subject matter.


If you're tired of seeing things you're tired of seeing, I'm afraid you've come to the wrong place.
 
2013-01-14 08:32:21 PM
Does anyone know the exact regime of performancing enhancing boosters he was on?

/EIP
 
2013-01-14 08:32:37 PM

MFAWG: Michael Jordan, who actually in invited his high school coach to his HoF induction to denigrate that coach for cutting him 30 years ago


That was surreal.

I bet his HS coach left there actually feeling sorry for Jordan.
 
2013-01-14 08:32:40 PM
So he's basically admitting to shiat we already know?  After Jodie Foster basically told everyone she's a lesbian last night, which I don't think anyone questioned, who's going to admit to blatantly obvious facts next?
 
2013-01-14 08:33:03 PM

All_Farked_Up: ilikeracecars: Millions of people are left wondering: where is Oprah's channel?

Millions are wondering: that fat whore has her own channel?


The smart ones are anticipating Lance's new book.
 
2013-01-14 08:33:08 PM

Warthog: So he:

1) cheated.
2) covered up that he cheated.
3) lied about cheating.
4) lied about covering up that he cheated.
5) Got caught.
6) Continued to lie.
7) Got caught again.
8) Realized he couldn't lie his way out of it.
9) Got banned and expunged from the record books, so he had nothing left to lose.
10) Decided to admit to everything in a final cash grab.

Do I have that right?  One hell of a ten step program there, Mr. Armstrong.


He did all that. I will not deny it. He will no longer deny it. His foundation has helped thousands of people. Do good deeds that bring a greater good not outdo a failure of the past? In spite of what the outcome now may be, for years his story has inspired many with cancer to fight. It has given hope to many. Yes he cheated to win at an ultra high level sporting event multiple times. That was wrong. Denying it was also wrong. The level of good his foundation has done should not be forgotten. His fame was based on cheating but he used that fame in the right way. He helped people with it. He helped himself too but he has helped thousands of cancer sufferers and their families. That should not be forgotten. Overall the effect has been a positive one for many many people. To deny that is not right.
 
2013-01-14 08:34:00 PM

StormChaser: No way! Next you're going to tell me Barry Bonds is on steroids!!


GTFO! Barry Bonds, really?


Set sarcasm meters to zero
 
2013-01-14 08:34:03 PM
Hello Mr Armstrong? This is the US Postal Service. Now that you've admitted to doping, we're gonna need to you to give us back those millions of dollars we gave you. Have a nice day.
 
2013-01-14 08:34:05 PM
This would be huge if anyone gave a shiat.
 
2013-01-14 08:34:06 PM
So what are all those people who claimed he was being persecuted for doing nothing wrong going to be saying?
 
2013-01-14 08:34:22 PM

All_Farked_Up: ilikeracecars: Millions of people are left wondering: where is Oprah's channel?

Millions are wondering: that fat whore has her own channel?


Whoa dude, dial it down a notch.
 
2013-01-14 08:34:54 PM
shiatty athlete and it sucks his charity will be harmed by this.

That is all.
 
2013-01-14 08:35:08 PM
horrornews.net

"Win if you can, lose if you must, but always cheat!"
 
kab
2013-01-14 08:35:33 PM

Contrabulous Flabtraption: Wait a minute! Who cares about cycling?


You do, or you wouldn't be posting here.
 
2013-01-14 08:37:16 PM

cryinoutloud: I don't know, I'm kind of in the "well, if everybody doped, then he was still the best" camp.

I don't care much either way, though. It's sports. Very lucrative sports, but still just a game.


I get what you're saying, but when you play in a sport, you agree to the rules of the game. If you refuse to play by the rules, whatever the reason, you're just a lousy sport. Your victories are lies, and you don't deserve to be propped up as a role model. "Everyone else is doing it" is a lame excuse.
 
2013-01-14 08:37:59 PM

GAT_00: So what are all those people who claimed he was being persecuted for doing nothing wrong going to be saying?


"HE STILL RAISED MILLIONS FOR CANCER!!!!11one"

I mean, most Lance freaks I saw were pretty quick to accept he doped on some level (or at least admit to themselves there was a strong possibility), but that's been their fallback position.
 
2013-01-14 08:38:29 PM
USADA chief executive Travis Tygart labeled the doping regimen allegedly carried out by the U.S. Postal Service team that Armstrong once led, "The most sophisticated, professionalized and successful doping program that sport has ever seen."

He got caught. And somehow I think just maaaaaaaaaaybe there are a few doping cyclists out there who haven't been caught yet. Like, the guys who finished 21st and are temporarily retroactively the winners of all those Tours de France because they only tested the top 20, or some such thing.

So, sophisticated and professionalized maybe, but not the most successful.
 
2013-01-14 08:39:09 PM
Meh.
 
2013-01-14 08:39:12 PM
But, but , but, he never tested positive???!!! Where, indeed, are all of those who defended him?

machoprogrammer: Anyone got the thread from when ADA brought the charges and the Lance nuthuggers were defending him?


THIS
 
2013-01-14 08:39:32 PM

thisispete: Palmer Eldritch: I've seen this question asked in several Lance threads, but I don't know if it ever got answered- does this expose him to legal action from the people he successfully sued for calling him a doper?

He certainly could face perjury charges after testifying in 2005 that he didn't dope.


Maybe not.  I'll preface this by saying I'm not admitted to practice in Texas, and that I know fark-all about Texas state law, but three minutes on the Google machine suggests that the statute of limitations in Texas for perjury may be somewhere between 2 and 5 years depending on how they classify the offense.  The testimony he gave was in 2005.  It's now 2013.

There are tolling theories and arguments about continuing to cover up a crime that sometimes may extend a statute of limitations, but my guess is he paid a lot of money to a lawyer to confirm for him that he's not going to jail for opening his mouth on Oprah before he did it.
 
2013-01-14 08:39:42 PM
And he still was faster than everybody else who was cheating. Winner in my book.
 
2013-01-14 08:40:28 PM

error 303: shiatty athlete and it sucks his charity will be harmed by this.

That is all.


I wouldn't say he's a shiatty athlete. He won the Tour de France 7 consecutive times against other athletes who were also doping. He was the dominant doper.

Is cheating really cheating if everyone's doing it?
 
2013-01-14 08:40:36 PM
Too little, too late. 'Fessing up now -- and most likely, being paid to do so -- just makes him look like an even more despicable sleazebag.
 
2013-01-14 08:41:00 PM
wait does he know Oprah doesn't have a tv show any more

or is he stuck in 2006 and thinks this matters now
 
2013-01-14 08:41:17 PM

kab: Contrabulous Flabtraption: Wait a minute! Who cares about cycling?

You do, or you wouldn't be posting here.


LOL - you're too stupid to live
 
2013-01-14 08:41:50 PM
"News"? What happened subby, was the obvious tag suspended for doping?
 
2013-01-14 08:41:50 PM

Coco LaFemme: So he's basically admitting to shiat we already know?  After Jodie Foster basically told everyone she's a lesbian last night, which I don't think anyone questioned, who's going to admit to blatantly obvious facts next?


Will Tom Cruise finally jump on Oprah's couch in excitement over how gay he is?
 
2013-01-14 08:41:53 PM

crotchgrabber: If you'll excuse me, I have to stuff both my nuts into some spandex now.


excellent segue
 
2013-01-14 08:42:33 PM
More like duhstrong.
 
2013-01-14 08:43:11 PM

Solid State Vittles: Oprah probably forced him to eat some more Crow.


media.tumblr.com
 
2013-01-14 08:43:26 PM

Killer Cars: GAT_00: So what are all those people who claimed he was being persecuted for doing nothing wrong going to be saying?

"HE STILL RAISED MILLIONS FOR CANCER!!!!11one"

I mean, most Lance freaks I saw were pretty quick to accept he doped on some level (or at least admit to themselves there was a strong possibility), but that's been their fallback position.


So has Komen.  That doesn't make them good.
 
2013-01-14 08:43:48 PM

miss diminutive: Coco LaFemme: So he's basically admitting to shiat we already know?  After Jodie Foster basically told everyone she's a lesbian last night, which I don't think anyone questioned, who's going to admit to blatantly obvious facts next?

Will Tom Cruise finally jump on Oprah's couch in excitement over how gay he is?


Wayne LaPierre will reveal how small his phallus is?
 
2013-01-14 08:43:50 PM
Boy, Lance really dropped the ball this time. Now I can stop holding my breath waiting for the other ball to drop. Admitting what he did really took some brass ball. The constant lying must have drove him f*cking nut.
 
2013-01-14 08:44:06 PM
So when are they going to submit the "runner-up" in these races to this level of scrutiny? I'd be very surprised if the top 20 in a given race didn't dope at some point.
 
2013-01-14 08:44:41 PM
I care. We need to change the way our society views sports, thereby obviating the motivations athletes have for using PEDs.
 
2013-01-14 08:44:45 PM

aerojockey: CokeBear: So? Its not like they can take away his moon landing.

Wrong Armstrong.  The guy who landed on the moon was Louis.


So Neil sang "What a Wonderful World" before winning the Tour de France? I knew that guy was on something.
 
2013-01-14 08:45:17 PM

miss diminutive: Coco LaFemme: So he's basically admitting to shiat we already know?  After Jodie Foster basically told everyone she's a lesbian last night, which I don't think anyone questioned, who's going to admit to blatantly obvious facts next?

Will Tom Cruise finally jump on Oprah's couch in excitement over how gay he is?


I never thought Tom Cruise was gay.  John Travolta?  Gayer than Liza Minnelli performing in the Castro district with the ghost of Liberace on piano and Freddy Mercury doing backing vocals.
 
2013-01-14 08:45:24 PM

MemeSlave: [1.bp.blogspot.com image 400x303]

Of course, everyone else did it too, and he still won, so that's something.


The question is whether we define cheating as "breaking the rules" or "having an unfair advantage over your competitors." Lance, and every other contending cyclist, was unquestionably guilty of the former. But, because the cheating was SO widespread and systemic, it's hard to argue that any cyclist was guilty of the latter, since they were all "cheating" in the exact same way.
 
2013-01-14 08:45:44 PM

FuryOfFirestorm: Boy, Lance really dropped the ball this time. Now I can stop holding my breath waiting for the other ball to drop. Admitting what he did really took some brass ball. The constant lying must have drove him f*cking nut.


I know you had a ball typing that, but you came across one nut short of a fruitcake.
 
2013-01-14 08:46:16 PM
Stupid Roadies. . . Ned Overend and Hans Rey are my cycling heroes!
 
2013-01-14 08:46:30 PM
Is it weird that I'm actually angrier at him for coming clean than for doping in the first place?

Don't get me wrong, I found the doping allegations very easy to believe (why should he be the only halfway decent cyclist who wasn't doping?) and I really could not farking care less about Lance Armstrong, whether he's clean or dirty. I respect his ability to beat cancer and bang Sheryl Crow, but that's unrelated to my non-interest in his cycling career.

But given that he was the one super-famous cyclist of his era, and given that he very very very strenuously denied the allegations, I kind of feel like he owes it to the world to keep on lying. It doesn't matter if anyone believes you. But when you FINALLY come clean, after all that fuss and hullabaloo, it robs the credibility of some future scumbag who I actually want to believe is innocent of whatever he's charged with.
 
2013-01-14 08:48:03 PM
Barry Bonds cheated with a mechanical device as well.
 
2013-01-14 08:49:24 PM

Xexi: Does anyone know the exact regime of performancing enhancing boosters he was on?

What was he on?!? He was on his BIKE, six hours a day!

/heard it in a commercial so I know it's true

 
2013-01-14 08:49:59 PM

semiotix: Is it weird that I'm actually angrier at him for coming clean than for doping in the first place?


Depends...if he's asking for forgiveness, f*ck him. If, knowing his asshole-ish ways, he's just coming off like "yeah, fine I doped..whatever", I can sort of respect that although that would just be example 4,957 of him being a complete asshole.
 
2013-01-14 08:50:15 PM

The All-Powerful Atheismo: What's bullshiat is that the effect was even more noticeable in Sammy Sosa and Mark McGwire and people didn't call them out nearly as much as they did Bonds


This is because Sosa and McGwire aren't assholes, so the press cut them some slack.
 
2013-01-14 08:50:48 PM

gymin26minutes: Xexi: Does anyone know the exact regime of performancing enhancing boosters he was on?

What was he on?!? He was on his BIKE, six hours a day!

/heard it in a commercial so I know it's true


If all it took was drugs to win the Tour de France then Ozzy would be the 24 time world record champion.
 
2013-01-14 08:50:53 PM

Shenanigans!: get what you're saying, but when you play in a sport, you agree to the rules of the game. If you refuse to play by the rules, whatever the reason, you're just a lousy sport. Your victories are lies, and you don't deserve to be propped up as a role model. "Everyone else is doing it" is a lame excuse.


I'm not saying that "everybody's doing it" is a valid excuse. I'm saying that if everybody really was doing it, then maybe, objectively, he was still the best at the sport. Or he was the best at doping. So he's pretty good at something, if he never even got caught once.

Other than that, I don't care too much about this.
 
2013-01-14 08:51:07 PM

Supes: The All-Powerful Atheismo: What's bullshiat is that the effect was even more noticeable in Sammy Sosa and Mark McGwire and people didn't call them out nearly as much as they did Bonds

This is because Sosa and McGwire aren't assholes, so the press cut them some slack.


Which is bullshiat, even if true.
 
2013-01-14 08:51:58 PM

cryinoutloud: he never even got caught once.


What if he did, but bought off some people to keep it private, same result?
 
2013-01-14 08:52:58 PM

After all this time, after he already got away with it, why the fark would he admit it now? Farking moran, if you're going to cheat, the at least be consistent about it.


xtupload.com

"Admitting he cheated at this point is like the Duke of Wellington admitting on his deathbed that he was going to lose to Napoleon at the Battle of Waterloo and the only reason he won was because he had the Prussian 4th corps to outflank General Lobau at Frichermont thus turning the tide of the whole battle and saving his ass."
 
2013-01-14 08:53:07 PM

The All-Powerful Atheismo: Supes: The All-Powerful Atheismo: What's bullshiat is that the effect was even more noticeable in Sammy Sosa and Mark McGwire and people didn't call them out nearly as much as they did Bonds

This is because Sosa and McGwire aren't assholes, so the press cut them some slack.

Which is bullshiat, even if true.


Oh I agree with you, they should all be banned from all baseball involvement forever. But, even if not justified, that's still the reason why Bonds was called out so much more. Likability goes a long way in the court of public opinion.
 
2013-01-14 08:53:31 PM
so NOW can we have a comparison of his doping to everyone else's doping???

Volume
Levels
Quality
Type
Absorption
Body metabolization
Reaction
Cost


Then we can do a ratio to time after the race.
Maybe we'll get everyone's "real" time.
 
2013-01-14 08:53:32 PM

thisispete: Palmer Eldritch: I've seen this question asked in several Lance threads, but I don't know if it ever got answered- does this expose him to legal action from the people he successfully sued for calling him a doper?

He certainly could face perjury charges after testifying in 2005 that he didn't dope.


my understanding is that he could get sued in civil court but the statue of limitations has probably passed for criminal perjury charges
 
2013-01-14 08:53:38 PM

Indubitably: To crow?


I wonder if she knew the truth?
 
2013-01-14 08:54:40 PM
I just realized something: Obvious tag looks just like the News tag, when on dope.
 
2013-01-14 08:55:15 PM

Coco LaFemme: miss diminutive: Coco LaFemme: So he's basically admitting to shiat we already know?  After Jodie Foster basically told everyone she's a lesbian last night, which I don't think anyone questioned, who's going to admit to blatantly obvious facts next?

Will Tom Cruise finally jump on Oprah's couch in excitement over how gay he is?

I never thought Tom Cruise was gay.  John Travolta?  Gayer than Liza Minnelli performing in the Castro district with the ghost of Liberace on piano and Freddy Mercury doing backing vocals.


That's....pretty gay. Well over 3,000 Elton Johns on the gay-o-meter.
 
2013-01-14 08:55:49 PM

Jeng: gymin26minutes: Xexi: Does anyone know the exact regime of performancing enhancing boosters he was on?

What was he on?!? He was on his BIKE, six hours a day!

/heard it in a commercial so I know it's true

If all it took was drugs to win the Tour de France then Ozzy would be the 24 time world record champion.


I actually agree. He was a total bad ass on a bike and destroyed the field (a field which we know know contained more than a few dopers) Those tours had an excitement to them that hasn't been equaled since.
 
2013-01-14 08:56:29 PM
Eventually through a series of even more tragic professional and personal relationship collapses, Lance will find himself sharing support with a group of men with similar problems. This will eventually lead to an unfortunate mishap during a special project when he loses his own life and then becomes his old self again.

His name was Lance Armstrong.

His name was Lance Armstrong.

His name was Lance Armstrong.
 
2013-01-14 08:57:23 PM
Who cares. We all knew cyclists were assholes already.
 
2013-01-14 08:58:36 PM
Welp, somebody farked up the ratings for that show.
 
2013-01-14 09:00:28 PM
Another Tin God, exposed. Sorry to see this.
 
2013-01-14 09:01:01 PM

jehovahs witness protection: Who cares. We all knew cyclists were assholes already.


thank you...
 
2013-01-14 09:01:49 PM
 ♪♪ Shot through the heart
And you're to blame
Lancie you give DOPE a bad name   ♪♪
 
2013-01-14 09:01:59 PM

semiotix: Is it weird that I'm actually angrier at him for coming clean than for doping in the first place?

Don't get me wrong, I found the doping allegations very easy to believe (why should he be the only halfway decent cyclist who wasn't doping?) and I really could not farking care less about Lance Armstrong, whether he's clean or dirty. I respect his ability to beat cancer and bang Sheryl Crow, but that's unrelated to my non-interest in his cycling career.

But given that he was the one super-famous cyclist of his era, and given that he very very very strenuously denied the allegations, I kind of feel like he owes it to the world to keep on lying. It doesn't matter if anyone believes you. But when you FINALLY come clean, after all that fuss and hullabaloo, it robs the credibility of some future scumbag who I actually want to believe is innocent of whatever he's charged with.


If the system weren't rigged to give him an incentive to break the rules and a disincentive to be honest about it...

I wonder how much to blame lawyers are for these stupid anti-doping rules. What I mean is, the way it is now the athletes have to juice to stay competitive, but the sports organization can't be sued by anyone who didn't want to juice because everyone is told up front it's against the rules. If juicing were allowed, however, how long would it be before someone who didn't want to juice sued the organization, claiming their "rights" were somehow violated? Even if the plaintiff voluntarily joined when they knew doping was allowed, the way courts work now I can see a jury siding with them.
 
2013-01-14 09:03:00 PM

moothemagiccow: wait does he know Oprah doesn't have a tv show any more

or is he stuck in 2006 and thinks this matters now


She's going to air this the night of the Super Bowl.
 
2013-01-14 09:05:50 PM
I should have kidnapped Oprah today.
 
2013-01-14 09:06:33 PM

thisispete: He certainly could face perjury charges after testifying in 2005 that he didn't dope.


Statute of limitations is three years on aggrevated perjury.
 
2013-01-14 09:06:46 PM

The Muthaship: Warthog: So he:

1) cheated.
2) covered up that he cheated.
3) lied about cheating.
4) lied about covering up that he cheated.
5) Got caught.
6) Continued to lie.
7) Got caught again.
8) Realized he couldn't lie his way out of it.
9) Got banned and expunged from the record books, so he had nothing left to lose.
10) Decided to admit to everything in a final cash grab.

Do I have that right?  One hell of a ten step program there, Mr. Armstrong.

You left out that he received money from people he sued because they said he cheated when he was cheating, but lied well enough in court to convince the jury that his accusers were lying, and he's keeping the money.


Just like those cases where the rape victim lies about being raped, sues the guy into oblivion and gets him put in jail, and gets to keep the money despite being paid hundreds/thousands or millions.

/Hate those legal systems
 
2013-01-14 09:07:57 PM
The only thing the doping scandal accomplished was bring my attention to something I never knew existed until it was brought up. It also succeeded in making me want to dop, because I wan to have superpowers too. It's not fair.
 
2013-01-14 09:08:14 PM

xevian: Just like those cases where the rape victim lies about being raped, sues the guy into oblivion and gets him put in jail, and gets to keep the money despite being paid hundreds/thousands or millions.


Not doubting it's happened, but I can't think of one where they admitted it.
 
2013-01-14 09:09:31 PM
s1.ibtimes.com

-Was it worth it, Lance?

-Want to compare bank account balances?
 
2013-01-14 09:11:20 PM
Found the link

Here you go

Some juicy nuggets like:
If your proof of Lance doping starts with "I don't buy..... this or that" you should just shut up. You sound dumb. Evidence is cut and dry.

and

I dont understand why if their evidence is so cut and dry, the federal investigation was just dropped.

I thought they saved the B samples for years, shouldnt they be able to test them now and come up with more than, people saying they saw it happen, if a lack of technology was the issue then?

Everyone who says that no way you could get 26 people to all tell the same lie....havent they all already proved they could do exactly that for years?

I find it interesting that theyre making him out to be the guy pulling all the strings, wouldnt he need a chemistry degree or something to have a super advanced untrackable doping system that lets you pass 500 plus tests? He should really market that at walgreens to people who need to pass a drug test at work.
 
2013-01-14 09:12:39 PM
I forgive him and vote for giving him back all the tour wins.
 
2013-01-14 09:13:55 PM
Wow, is this all you have to do to get on Oprah?
 
2013-01-14 09:14:25 PM

Warthog: So he:

1) cheated.
2) covered up that he cheated.
3) lied about cheating.
4) lied about covering up that he cheated.
5) Got caught.
6) Continued to lie.
7) Got caught again.
8) Realized he couldn't lie his way out of it.
9) Got banned and expunged from the record books, so he had nothing left to lose.
10) Decided to admit to everything in a final cash grab.

Do I have that right?  One hell of a ten step program there, Mr. Armstrong.


You forgot one, he critized and destroyed the repretations and careers of everyone who even suggested that he doped.

I hope he plans to apologize to Greg LeMond.
 
2013-01-14 09:14:59 PM

machoprogrammer: Found the link

Here you go

Some juicy nuggets like:
If your proof of Lance doping starts with "I don't buy..... this or that" you should just shut up. You sound dumb. Evidence is cut and dry.

and

I dont understand why if their evidence is so cut and dry, the federal investigation was just dropped.

I thought they saved the B samples for years, shouldnt they be able to test them now and come up with more than, people saying they saw it happen, if a lack of technology was the issue then?

Everyone who says that no way you could get 26 people to all tell the same lie....havent they all already proved they could do exactly that for years?

I find it interesting that theyre making him out to be the guy pulling all the strings, wouldnt he need a chemistry degree or something to have a super advanced untrackable doping system that lets you pass 500 plus tests? He should really market that at walgreens to people who need to pass a drug test at work.


If you guys want to whole in and outs of it all, I suggest finding the Sports 60 Minutes program that aired a few days ago. They led with the Lance Armstrong story. Most likely why he's now making an appearance on Oprah. If anyone had any doubst before, watch the program...
 
2013-01-14 09:16:54 PM
How many people were making sh*tloads of money because of his success? That's what leads to "passed" drug tests.
 
2013-01-14 09:18:19 PM
I don't care that he's a doper, but I do care that he's a liar and a cheat and apparently a bully.

Bad human beings only deserve our mockery and disdain. Lance Armstrong will forever be remembered as a bad human being.
 
2013-01-14 09:18:36 PM

Warthog: Shoot, you're right.   I hereby nominate Lance Armstrong as Biggest Douche in the History of Sports.  Anyone have someone to one-up him?


Sandusky

/if we are comparing self delusional states here...
 
2013-01-14 09:18:42 PM

SN1987a goes boom: So when are they going to submit the "runner-up" in these races to this level of scrutiny? I'd be very surprised if the top 20 in a given race didn't dope at some point.


Did any of those other people make a bazillion dollars selling themselves as the American Dream personified?
 
2013-01-14 09:22:28 PM
Did he cry? Cuz I'm pretty sure that crying on Oprah's show is like a get out of jail free card for celebrities.

Disgraced televangelists cry to Jesus in front of their congregations. Disgraced celebrities cry to Oprah in front of a live studio audience.

For Lance's sake, I hope he cried.

/and YOU get absolution and YOU get absolution and YOU and YOU and YOU and YOU get absolution!
 
2013-01-14 09:23:10 PM
Why didn't he just say he was on hormone replacement treatment?
 
2013-01-14 09:23:11 PM
Goddamit Lance!!!  All my hopes and dreams dashed.  LOL
 
2013-01-14 09:23:35 PM

CokeBear: So? Its not like they can take away his moon landing.


No, no, he's the trumpet guy.
 
2013-01-14 09:26:02 PM

chumboobler: He did all that. I will not deny it. He will no longer deny it. His foundation has helped thousands of people. Do good deeds that bring a greater good not outdo a failure of the past? In spite of what the outcome now may be, for years his story has inspired many with cancer to fight. It has given hope to many. Yes he cheated to win at an ultra high level sporting event multiple times. That was wrong. Denying it was also wrong. The level of good his foundation has done should not be forgotten. His fame was based on cheating but he used that fame in the right way. He helped people with it. He helped himself too but he has helped thousands of cancer sufferers and their families. That should not be forgotten. Overall the effect has been a positive one for many many people. To deny that is not right.


Rob a bank, create a lucrative human trafficking, prostitution and drug ring with the funds, take your earnings and donate half of them to St. Jude's, and keep the other half and retire a millionaire. Yeah those first two things were bad, but look at the awesome cancer research being done with your illicit gains! Don't forget that! To deny that is not right. Not right, I tell you! Wear your Cheatstrong rubber band with pride.
 
2013-01-14 09:26:18 PM

Bill_Wick's_Friend: Did he cry? Cuz I'm pretty sure that crying on Oprah's show is only natural because she mists your face with sulfenic acid.

ftfy
 
2013-01-14 09:26:34 PM
First he loses his nutz, now he loses most everything else.

Payback can be a biatch buddy!

/Non-smoker who hates mothafarkers who want to raise taxes on cigarettes.
//Hates Rob Reiner most of all!
 
2013-01-14 09:28:26 PM
I wish I could go on Oprah every time I screw up.
 
2013-01-14 09:29:06 PM
I heard he said he would give his left nut for all this to go away.

/ i bet those spandex would fit a little more comfortable then.
 
2013-01-14 09:31:27 PM
As a (former) fan, I was actually more outraged at him walking out on his family.
 
2013-01-14 09:32:52 PM

Solid State Vittles: Oprah probably forced him to eat some more Crow.


Are you Armstrong enough to lick my clam?
 
2013-01-14 09:36:33 PM
Would these drugs make me awesomely strong and fit? If so, I'm not using my balls anyhow.
 
2013-01-14 09:36:48 PM
Three Sevens and a one two three four

/ No Cal Bay Area Joke
 
2013-01-14 09:37:29 PM

valkore: chumboobler: He did all that. I will not deny it. He will no longer deny it. His foundation has helped thousands of people. Do good deeds that bring a greater good not outdo a failure of the past? In spite of what the outcome now may be, for years his story has inspired many with cancer to fight. It has given hope to many. Yes he cheated to win at an ultra high level sporting event multiple times. That was wrong. Denying it was also wrong. The level of good his foundation has done should not be forgotten. His fame was based on cheating but he used that fame in the right way. He helped people with it. He helped himself too but he has helped thousands of cancer sufferers and their families. That should not be forgotten. Overall the effect has been a positive one for many many people. To deny that is not right.

Rob a bank, create a lucrative human trafficking, prostitution and drug ring with the funds, take your earnings and donate half of them to St. Jude's, and keep the other half and retire a millionaire. Yeah those first two things were bad, but look at the awesome cancer research being done with your illicit gains! Don't forget that! To deny that is not right. Not right, I tell you! Wear your Cheatstrong rubber band with pride.


not even close. What he did was good on the back end in respect to his charity, not prostitution or human trafficking. He never did that and to try and equate it lets me know you are drunk or stupid to bring that argument forth. His charity helped thousands and will continue to. He may have lost respect but he is a good person due to his good work. You can hate all you want but he has done good. He cheated and helped thousands.... Is that a fair trade? yep. Tell me how his charity helping cancer sufferers is bad... Tell me.... You can't. Did he do something bad? yep..... Did something awesome and good result? yep.... Sometimes good things can come from bad actions... It happens.
 
2013-01-14 09:40:43 PM
The way I see it is that he is still a rolemodel in the fact that he was once about done in with cancer then turned it around to complete one of the hardest endurance races there is for many years to follow.

Also, according to a lot of the cyclists they say the people that always pop up around the top 20 are all doping so I guess all it did was put all of those guys on the same playing field. The problem with Lance is that he got too greedy and power hungry to the point he became the one and only target.
 
2013-01-14 09:41:01 PM

Sherman Potter: As a (former) fan, I was actually more outraged at him walking out on his family.


Well, then...tomorrow, that vacuous cow Sheryl Crow sits down with Oprah to apologize for that, and for ripping off Kevin Gilbert and dumping him when she hit the big time.
 
2013-01-14 09:42:17 PM
According to the article, the cancer spread to his BRAINS...wait wut?
 
2013-01-14 09:43:17 PM
Where can I get some of that dope? Our modern super athletes seem to be suffering no ill effects
 
2013-01-14 09:43:51 PM

Gulper Eel: Sherman Potter: As a (former) fan, I was actually more outraged at him walking out on his family.

Well, then...tomorrow, that vacuous cow Sheryl Crow sits down with Oprah to apologize for that, and for ripping off Kevin Gilbert and dumping him when she hit the big time.


Oprah to have Denis Leary on confessing about taking Bill Hicks act.
 
2013-01-14 09:45:09 PM

Warthog: So he:

1) cheated.
2) covered up that he cheated.
3) lied about cheating.
4) lied about covering up that he cheated.
5) Got caught.
6) Continued to lie.
7) Got caught again.
8) Realized he couldn't lie his way out of it.
9) Got banned and expunged from the record books, so he had nothing left to lose.
10) Decided to admit to everything in a final cash grab.

Do I have that right?  One hell of a ten step program there, Mr. Armstrong.


Pete Rose, Part 2.

I'm genuinely bummed I defended the guy. This should finish professional cycling as a sport, though it probably won't.
 
2013-01-14 09:45:31 PM
 
2013-01-14 09:49:14 PM

Warthog: 10) Decided to admit to everything in a final cash grab.


Yep.

I'm sure he'll still have a cushion worth millions to land on after failing so pathetically.

/ unlike plebs like me
// ...who would wind up homeless if I did shiat like this...
 
2013-01-14 09:51:39 PM
Don't you know what this means? Massive amounts of steroids and exercise can help you beat cancer. The man is a medical genius!
 
2013-01-14 09:51:47 PM

The All-Powerful Atheismo: StormChaser: No way! Next you're going to tell me Barry Bonds is on steroids!!

I'm still farking pissed at that motherfarker. I've been a life-long giants fan, watching since the days of Will Clark. I know Bonds wasn't doping when he first got here. He got bigger and bigger but it was so slow that I didn't see it. In 2001 during his record year they had numerous promotional materials touting his "outstanding training and workout regimen". I believed it.

fark you, Barry. I'm glad you're not going to the hall.


I know exactly how you feel. I grew up idolizing Clark during the late 80's and I stopped watching baseball entirely for years because they let him go to free up Payroll for Bonds. It wasn't until after he stopped playing that I started following the Giants again.
 
2013-01-14 09:52:23 PM
So now we know how to fix up ball cancer survivors?
 
2013-01-14 09:54:29 PM

Hells_Nachos: I know exactly how you feel. I grew up idolizing Clark during the late 80's and I stopped watching baseball entirely for years because they let him go to free up Payroll for Bonds. It wasn't until after he stopped playing that I started following the Giants again.


Next thing you know, 10 years from now we'll find out the current Giants roster is guilty of beard-enhancing drugs. And that would break my heart
 
2013-01-14 09:54:35 PM

GAT_00: So what are all those people who claimed he was being persecuted for doing nothing wrong going to be saying?


That he was persecuted for doing nothing wrong. His violations were mere malum prohibitum, not malum in se. We should just acknowledge PEDs are going to be used and move on like adults, instead of playing "Gotcha!" games like toddlers.
 
2013-01-14 09:55:38 PM

GungFu: [s1.ibtimes.com image 660x334]

-Was it worth it, Lance?

-Want to compare bank account balances?


I hope to hell Oprah called him on that picture.  Arrogant asshole tweeted that picture the day after they stripped him of his wins, knowing that he doped to win them.

i2.cdn.turner.com
What were you thinking?
 
2013-01-14 09:57:31 PM

Gulper Eel: Well, then...tomorrow, that vacuous cow Sheryl Crow sits down with Oprah to apologize for that, and for ripping off Kevin Gilbert and dumping him when she hit the big time.


That would be bigger than Lance admitting doping, as far as I'm concerned.
 
2013-01-14 10:01:02 PM
Greg LeMond has a boner right now.
 
2013-01-14 10:01:47 PM
"Everyone was doing it. I just did it the best!"

I'm number one. I'm number one....
 
2013-01-14 10:02:08 PM

the_foo: When are they going to realize that no one cares?


I certainly don't care. If this were a sport where half of the guys were clean, I'd care, but I have no doubt in my mind that EVERY.SINGLE.RIDER. was/is dirty. As they're all on a level playing field, I really don't care.
 
2013-01-14 10:02:42 PM
He still couldn't hit a Fast Ball.
 
2013-01-14 10:02:57 PM
I love his arrogance and dickishness for some reason. He's such an asshole that it actual makes me like him more.
 
2013-01-14 10:03:57 PM
So, who gets his vacated titles? No one.

Oprah still has a show? Wtf?
 
2013-01-14 10:04:52 PM
YOU get an asterisk!   YOU get an asterisk!   YOU get an asterisk!
 
2013-01-14 10:05:36 PM

The Muthaship: How many people were making sh*tloads of money because of his success? That's what leads to "passed" drug tests.


Yeah well, not really.

During his career you couldn't test for EPO, that's why his tests were clean. Since they were retested, already in 2005, his B-samples were found to be positive.

Obviously for sanctions to take place, both the A and B sample has to be positive, so since the A samples had been tested with the old testing method, nothing official came of it. But everyone who followed the sport, ie. not Americans, new he was positive since 2005.
 
2013-01-14 10:05:57 PM

HMS_Blinkin: Otherwise known as every professional cyclist for at least the last 40 years....


The cyclists not doping were called "bread and water" cyclists.  They had a name for them.  If a "bread and water" cyclist came 32nd in a race ahead of the other cyclists not doping, they were the best racer that day IMHO.
 
2013-01-14 10:06:38 PM

Twitch Boy: YOU get an asterisk!   YOU get an asterisk!   YOU get an asterisk!


Bravo
/Vote for funniest now logged
 
2013-01-14 10:07:08 PM

HMS_Blinkin: Otherwise known as every professional cyclist for at least the last 40 years....


You mean every professional athlete.
 
2013-01-14 10:08:21 PM

the_foo: When are they going to realize that no one cares?


No one? There's at least you that cares.
 
2013-01-14 10:09:31 PM

moefuggenbrew: Don't care, never did.


You sound butthurt. Have you filled out the application?
 
2013-01-14 10:11:30 PM

hdhale:
I'm genuinely bummed I defended the guy. This should finish professional cycling as a sport, though it probably won't.


Why would it affect professional cycling?

What Americans can't understand is, apparently, that Armstrong was tested positive in 2005 using a test that can detect EPO. That's 8 years ago.

Who cares that he admits something that has been official for 8 years?

All riders have been tested with a test that /can/ detect EPO use since 2005. It's still possible to use EPO, but that hinges on not being tested. So, using EPO up to or during a race is out. You can use it during training, but that's dodgy as there's unannounced tests there as well, and you have to inform the doping agency of your whereabouts at all times.
 
2013-01-14 10:12:02 PM

The All-Powerful Atheismo: aerojockey: CokeBear: So? Its not like they can take away his moon landing.

Wrong Armstrong.  The guy who landed on the moon was Louis.

No that was Apollo Creed.


No, I think that was Creedence Clearwater Revival. At least I didn't lose that.

/better not be obscure
 
2013-01-14 10:15:37 PM

mrshowrules: HMS_Blinkin: Otherwise known as every professional cyclist for at least the last 40 years....

The cyclists not doping were called "bread and water" cyclists.  They had a name for them.  If a "bread and water" cyclist came 32nd in a race ahead of the other cyclists not doping, they were the best racer that day IMHO.


32nd? Dude, if you look at any Tour de France competition (especially during the years that Armstrong was competing), you'd have to go at least 100 riders down the list before you found someone who wasn't doped up to his eyeballs. Pretty much every pro rider, who was part of a major sponsored team, was (and likely still is) doping like crazy. There is a reason why the Tours that Armstrong won have not had the guy who came in 2nd moved up to 1st retroactively. They're leaving those races vacant of winners because they know it would take years and years to find a guy who 1) finished the race and 2) was demonstrably not doping.
 
2013-01-14 10:16:58 PM

spawn73: hdhale:
I'm genuinely bummed I defended the guy. This should finish professional cycling as a sport, though it probably won't.

Why would it affect professional cycling?

What Americans can't understand is, apparently, that Armstrong was tested positive in 2005 using a test that can detect EPO. That's 8 years ago.

Who cares that he admits something that has been official for 8 years?

All riders have been tested with a test that /can/ detect EPO use since 2005. It's still possible to use EPO, but that hinges on not being tested. So, using EPO up to or during a race is out. You can use it during training, but that's dodgy as there's unannounced tests there as well, and you have to inform the doping agency of your whereabouts at all times.


I am still betting guys are not clean. They are likely on something else now. HGH at the least, I would suspect
 
2013-01-14 10:18:24 PM
It's ironic that Lance Armstrong never took a single drug in his entire life until the World Anti-Doping Agency pumped his body with mind-altering drugs, which forced Armstrong to "admit he was a cheater".
 
2013-01-14 10:19:21 PM

Mark Ratner: Oprah still has a show? Wtf?


Dude, she has an entire channel.
 
2013-01-14 10:20:26 PM
I admire the guy's ability to achieve his goals.
 
2013-01-14 10:22:42 PM
I don't know why it all comes at such a surprise.

The guy liner, tattoos, groupies. He was a young punk when I first saw him.

The road must have taken its toll.

Well, finally it is in the open, he copped to it, he took Dope.

Good luck Billy Joe, stay strong.
 
2013-01-14 10:24:44 PM
Let MLK Jr. indict him:

"I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character. "

That is why Lance is not a white douchebag, he is just a douchebag.
 
2013-01-14 10:25:19 PM
Doprah
 
2013-01-14 10:33:00 PM

Confabulat: I don't care that he's a doper, but I do care that he's a liar and a cheat and apparently a bully.

Bad human beings only deserve our mockery and disdain. Lance Armstrong will forever be remembered as a bad human being.


Yep. Though it still doesn't mean saying "nobody could have done that without doping" is proper evidence, even if it did turn out to be correct this time.

/Lance knew he did it, and could have saved everyone the trouble of a full investigation
//he chose to fark around with the system instead, and ruined his friends' lives in the process
///fark him
 
2013-01-14 10:37:08 PM

The All-Powerful Atheismo: aerojockey: CokeBear: So? Its not like they can take away his moon landing.

Wrong Armstrong.  The guy who landed on the moon was Louis.

No that was Apollo Creed.


i
 
2013-01-14 10:38:14 PM
HAI GUIZE WHATS HAPPENING?

cdn.wl.uproxx.com
 
2013-01-14 10:40:53 PM
Miss NY was one of the few who was surprised.

Miss SC rumored to have simply muttered "You didn't know? Bless your heart, you naive little turd. Now put the crown on."

a.abcnews.com
 
2013-01-14 10:42:31 PM
I've really wanted to ask this question for a while now...who really gives 3/16ths of a flying fark about this knob??!?!??

Hell, who gives 1/64th of a shiat about these idiots PERIOD?!?!!??


Anyone who gives a shiat about a "sport" that most people who participate in were the ones who were told they weren't cool enough to play Magic: The Gathering should tell you all you need to know about it.
 
2013-01-14 10:45:30 PM
Sounds like he has an axe to grind. If he actually doped, where's the positive drug test?

No one cares Lance.You are faaaaar more than a day late and a dollar short. You're the little kid with crumbs on your shirt and chocolate all over your mouth - confessing now does you no good. You still have ti take your spanking.
 
2013-01-14 10:45:33 PM
"Of course I doped. Fame, chicks, and even though I got caught I still get to go home to my mansion and $100 million. The real mystery is: Why are people still so shocked that human beings respond to incentives?"
 
2013-01-14 10:45:52 PM

fatalvenom: Hell, who gives 1/64th of a shiat about these idiots PERIOD?!?!!??


Watch the Tour de France next July.
There's more to life on Earth than what happens in the US.
 
2013-01-14 10:45:54 PM
James Frey: "Lance.....call me....we'll compare notes. I got a great new bracelet idea too. Something for the ankle. Its never been thought of."

static.guim.co.uk
 
2013-01-14 10:48:05 PM
 
2013-01-14 10:50:13 PM

CokeBear: So? Its not like they can take away his moon landing.


Nor his total awesomeness for repeatedly kicking French as at their own sort. Rock on you uni-testicular slayer of French cyclists.
 
2013-01-14 10:50:26 PM
Oh, and lance, fark you. I don't even care about the doping. I do care that your conscience was absolutely fine with sending threatening text messages to women. What a low life loser.
 
2013-01-14 10:51:02 PM

GAT_00: So what are all those people who claimed he was being persecuted for doing nothing wrong going to be saying?


I am saying that I'm disappointed. I thought he was clean. But I admit I was wrong and I move on.
 
2013-01-14 10:51:30 PM
Like none of us took aspirin to get over a freakin' headache.
 
2013-01-14 10:51:53 PM

machoprogrammer: spawn73: hdhale:
I'm genuinely bummed I defended the guy. This should finish professional cycling as a sport, though it probably won't.

Why would it affect professional cycling?

What Americans can't understand is, apparently, that Armstrong was tested positive in 2005 using a test that can detect EPO. That's 8 years ago.

Who cares that he admits something that has been official for 8 years?

All riders have been tested with a test that /can/ detect EPO use since 2005. It's still possible to use EPO, but that hinges on not being tested. So, using EPO up to or during a race is out. You can use it during training, but that's dodgy as there's unannounced tests there as well, and you have to inform the doping agency of your whereabouts at all times.

I am still betting guys are not clean. They are likely on something else now. HGH at the least, I would suspect


Maybe, maybe not.

It's definetly very different now. Brian Holm put it quite good: "When I was riding, we talked about the riders who weren't doping. Now the riders discuss who might be doping, and those riders are very unpopular because they make the races harder for everyone".

Brian Holm is the sports director for Omega Pharma-Quick Step btw., and admitted to EPO use in 2007. He's a cancer survivour like Lance Armstrong.
 
2013-01-14 10:53:39 PM
Thank you to the person who sponsored me....you know who you are.
 
2013-01-14 10:55:21 PM

JohnBigBootay: Oh, and lance, fark you. I don't even care about the doping. I do care that your conscience was absolutely fine with sending threatening text messages to women. What a low life loser.


Instead of whining, let's ask your mom what she thought of his texts. She's a big girl and can speak for herself after all. Rumors are she was sort of intrigued.
 
2013-01-14 10:55:50 PM
Did it increase advertising revenue? Yes? Mission accomplished.

It's all they care about.

Don't deny it.
 
2013-01-14 10:56:10 PM
I'll be curious how he'll be received this year on the Xterra circuit.

Or is he still banned?
 
2013-01-14 10:57:40 PM

clowncar on fire: JohnBigBootay: Oh, and lance, fark you. I don't even care about the doping. I do care that your conscience was absolutely fine with sending threatening text messages to women. What a low life loser.

Instead of whining, let's ask your mom what she thought of his texts. She's a big girl and can speak for herself after all. Rumors are she was sort of intrigued.


He goes ball in.
 
2013-01-14 10:58:07 PM
Scauses for everyone!
 
2013-01-14 10:58:46 PM
Am I missing something here or didn't we used to have an "obvious tag to cover this sort of thing?
 
2013-01-14 10:59:19 PM

Confabulat: Mark Ratner: Oprah still has a show? Wtf?

Dude, she has an entire channel.


Dude, thank god I have basic cable. I'm paying 25 bucks a month not to watch her shiat.
 
2013-01-14 10:59:24 PM

UsikFark: clowncar on fire: JohnBigBootay: Oh, and lance, fark you. I don't even care about the doping. I do care that your conscience was absolutely fine with sending threatening text messages to women. What a low life loser.

Instead of whining, let's ask your mom what she thought of his texts. She's a big girl and can speak for herself after all. Rumors are she was sort of intrigued.

He goes ball in.


Ball to the wall as it were?
 
2013-01-14 11:01:19 PM

Mark Ratner: Confabulat: Mark Ratner: Oprah still has a show? Wtf?

Dude, she has an entire channel.

Dude, thank god I have basic cable. I'm paying 25 bucks a month not to watch her shiat.


Exactly why I dumped cable 2 years ago. Got off the wagon with a recent subscription to crackle and net flix. i feel so dirty.
 
2013-01-14 11:05:14 PM

Contrabulous Flabtraption: Wait a minute! Who cares about cycling?


Lot's of people watch that Iditarod thingy
 
2013-01-14 11:06:10 PM
Mmm that's good schadenfreude!

Pretty much everything that's happened in the last several months with Armstrong has confirmed the impression I've always had of him as an arrogant manipulative p.o.s.
 
2013-01-14 11:08:53 PM

clowncar on fire: UsikFark: clowncar on fire: JohnBigBootay: Oh, and lance, fark you. I don't even care about the doping. I do care that your conscience was absolutely fine with sending threatening text messages to women. What a low life loser.

Instead of whining, let's ask your mom what she thought of his texts. She's a big girl and can speak for herself after all. Rumors are she was sort of intrigued.

He goes ball in.

Ball to the wall as it were?


Ball in the Hall.
 
2013-01-14 11:11:55 PM
Strongbad?
 
2013-01-14 11:13:15 PM
Oprah Winfrey admitted on TV to Lance Armstrong that she has been eating large portions of food.
 
2013-01-14 11:15:50 PM

Mark Ratner: Confabulat: Mark Ratner: Oprah still has a show? Wtf?

Dude, she has an entire channel.

Dude, thank god I have basic cable. I'm paying 25 bucks a month not to watch her shiat.


I pay $10 / month for basic basic basic cable (the kind you have to call up for and ask specifically for, cause they won't sell it online) and I STILL get her channel.
 
2013-01-14 11:16:14 PM

whatshisname: fatalvenom: Hell, who gives 1/64th of a shiat about these idiots PERIOD?!?!!??

Watch the Tour de France next July.
There's more to life on Earth than what happens in the US.


It doesnt matter where it takes place. Road bike scum are one of the biggest piece of shiat demographics of human beings.

Get on one of these:

i1045.photobucket.com

Get the fark off my roads. You twinks on your bikes dont pay taxes and licensing fees to use my roadways.

Go find a cock and somewhere else to ride and not piss off everyone else because you just happen to be a douchebag.
 
2013-01-14 11:17:01 PM
You can follow the whole thing on www.oprah.com btw.

Dunno why Oprah is giving it away for free, but whatever.
 
2013-01-14 11:18:00 PM

spawn73: hdhale:
I'm genuinely bummed I defended the guy. This should finish professional cycling as a sport, though it probably won't.

Why would it affect professional cycling?

What Americans can't understand is, apparently, that Armstrong was tested positive in 2005 using a test that can detect EPO. That's 8 years ago.

Who cares that he admits something that has been official for 8 years?

All riders have been tested with a test that /can/ detect EPO use since 2005. It's still possible to use EPO, but that hinges on not being tested. So, using EPO up to or during a race is out. You can use it during training, but that's dodgy as there's unannounced tests there as well, and you have to inform the doping agency of your whereabouts at all times.


The perception here is that it's not who is cheating that is noteworthy, it's who is not cheating because they are so rare.

While PED detection technology has come a long way in the past several years, the fact is that PEDs have also advanced as well as the masking agents that help riders avoid detection. The guy that wins the Tour de France this year will have done so because he a) beat his fellow competitors; b) beat the course; c) beat the system.
 
2013-01-14 11:18:47 PM

fatalvenom: You twinks on your bikes dont pay taxes and licensing fees to use my roadways.


I don't ride a bike for fun, I ride one cause I can't afford to own a car and I avoid roads like the plague. I use sidewalks as much as possible. But then all the pedestrians get in a snit because I'm technically supposed to be on the road, but I'd much rather run into one of them than an SUV, so they can shove it.
 
2013-01-14 11:21:24 PM
So what?

There isn't a 100% clean sport today.
 
2013-01-14 11:26:17 PM

hbk72777: So what?

There isn't a 100% clean sport today.



WNBA?
 
2013-01-14 11:27:37 PM

fatalvenom: hbk72777: So what?

There isn't a 100% clean sport today.


WNBA?


DMSO
 
2013-01-14 11:29:28 PM

Nothing To See Here: fatalvenom: hbk72777: So what?

There isn't a 100% clean sport today.


WNBA?

DMSO


Championship Darts?
Or is beer considered doping?
 
2013-01-14 11:38:56 PM

whatshisname: Nothing To See Here: fatalvenom: hbk72777: So what?

There isn't a 100% clean sport today.


WNBA?

DMSO

Championship Darts?
Or is beer considered doping?


Not at all. Any sport where you can drink beer and calm your hand to make you a better athlete is pretty damn sweet.

/ I wish drinking vodka and banging chicks 15lbs overweight would be considered a sport.
 
2013-01-14 11:39:05 PM

fatalvenom: hbk72777: So what?

There isn't a 100% clean sport today.


WNBA?


I'm pretty sure some of those "female" players had, or have, a penis and testicles.
 
2013-01-14 11:54:13 PM
Perhaps his performance-enhancing drugs caused the cancer.
 
2013-01-14 11:56:14 PM
Armstrong, Bonds, Sosa, etc. It just makes the case for an Unlimited Class in professional sports. You could also throw in the guys who would undoubedly cut off their feet so that they could use the newest prosthetics.
 
2013-01-14 11:58:14 PM

semiotix: I respect his ability to beat cancer and bang Sheryl Crow


Not sure how he got Sheryl Crow, but you do know that Armstrong probably got cancer as a direct result of the performance-enhancing drugs he was taking?
 
2013-01-14 11:59:44 PM
So he doped up to beat a bunch of other dopers? Meh.
 
2013-01-15 12:05:16 AM

advex101: It just makes the case for an Unlimited Class in professional sports.


We already have that. It's called "Professional Cycling". It is the one sport where the percentage of dopers is so high that I don't even think you can consider doping cheating.
 
2013-01-15 12:13:11 AM
Well, that took balls.

/Really?  It took this long?  I'm ashamed of all of you.
 
2013-01-15 12:15:04 AM
Called it. And I was told "it was all circumstantial, he never failed a test!"
 
2013-01-15 12:15:20 AM
What a douchenozzle. If he were a man he would give back the 7 yellow jerseys.
 
2013-01-15 12:22:07 AM
My favorite argument was "Everyone else on his team had to dope just to keep up with him!"
 
2013-01-15 12:24:33 AM
It's ok to hte on Armstrong, given the fact He's vehemenly denied it for so long, then fesses up after he's made a boatload of cash Whoring him self out, then discreetly sayinghe may repay the USPS for some of their sponsorship money.
And for those myopic/uneducated folk, get the d*ck out of you ass/mouth/both, put down your closeout Walmart Camos, and get some exercise. I'm surprised a lot more of you haters don't get winded using the remotecontrol.
/Just bought a 29" mountain bike
//Don't ride anywhere near the miserable, hating, Homo fat farks.
///Doing a 7day,700 mile ride in Colorado come summer. Your Hoverround doesn't have the batteries to carry Hating, obese fat farks like you.
 
2013-01-15 12:25:44 AM
George Carlin said it best: 'fark Lance Armstrong.'
 
2013-01-15 12:35:52 AM

Benevolent Misanthrope: Well, that took balls.

/Really?  It took this long?  I'm ashamed of all of you.


Don't worry, I'm sure you will turn that shame inward when you read the third post.
 
2013-01-15 12:36:11 AM
Don't care if he doped. Don't care if any baseball, football or basketball player did. You want millions and are willing to trade your future health for it, have at it my friend. Just remember one thing. It's your choice. You can't blame anyone else later when the consequences come.
 
2013-01-15 12:42:06 AM
Confabulat

I don't care that he's a doper, but I do care that he's a liar and a cheat and apparently a bully.

Bad human beings only deserve our mockery and disdain. Lance Armstrong will forever be remembered as a bad human being.


Lance Armstrong is reportedly a massive douchebag in real life and incredibly arrogant. fark him. His charity may have helped people but was all to boost his image and bolster his ego, not because he's a good person.
 
2013-01-15 12:47:30 AM
Sounds like Lance finally shifted gears.
 
2013-01-15 12:49:04 AM
It's pretty easy to sit here and pass judgment on Lance for cheating but have you ever stopped and thought, I mean really thought, about what you would do if you were put in his situation? You are arguably one of the best in the world at something but as luck would have it everybody who is also one of the best at this same thing is cheating. So you have two choices. You either cheat and win massive amounts of fame and fortune or you stand by your principles and watch the best in the world get smaller and smaller as they ride away from you. If you really think about it it's not that easy of a question to answer.

Anybody who can say they wouldn't cheat in less than 10 minutes hasn't thought about it or has never been tested.
 
2013-01-15 12:50:03 AM
Keep Austin weird Lance
 
2013-01-15 12:50:10 AM

ilikeracecars: Benevolent Misanthrope: Well, that took balls.

/Really?  It took this long?  I'm ashamed of all of you.

Don't worry, I'm sure you will turn that shame inward when you read the third post.


I'm so ashamed.
 
2013-01-15 12:57:19 AM

WittyReference: Obvious tag busy getting a transfusion?

 
2013-01-15 12:58:14 AM
how sweet and honest of him.

Does this mean he is going to give back the 100 million he stole too?
 
2013-01-15 01:01:55 AM

crotchgrabber: Lots of people and companies have been threatening to sue him. I'm sure some will try. I'd bet on Trek, USPS, Discovery, Landis, and I read something about The Sunday times in London calling for a lawsuit because he sued them for libel a while back and won.


I don't know if it is still the case, but at least in the past, the truth of a claim was not defense against Libel in the UK.
 
2013-01-15 01:04:06 AM

All_Farked_Up: HMS_Blinkin: Otherwise known as every professional cyclist for at least the last 40 years....

This. Lance just got caught.


not sure if serious, but plenty of the riders got caught. lance was just the latest one.
 
2013-01-15 01:04:36 AM

fatalvenom: whatshisname: fatalvenom: Hell, who gives 1/64th of a shiat about these idiots PERIOD?!?!!??

Watch the Tour de France next July.
There's more to life on Earth than what happens in the US.

It doesnt matter where it takes place. Road bike scum are one of the biggest piece of shiat demographics of human beings.

Get on one of these:



Get the fark off my roads. You twinks on your bikes dont pay taxes and licensing fees to use my roadways.

Go find a cock and somewhere else to ride and not piss off everyone else because you just happen to be a douchebag.


My bike doesn't tear up your roadways. And I drive, thus I do pay for them. Please step out of your vehicle and squat on a brat, dickbag.
 
2013-01-15 01:10:30 AM
So why does the Tour de France even exist? If you have to cheat to even be remotely competitive, perhaps it's not a sport worthy of our attention at all. Maybe it should just die.
 
2013-01-15 01:17:11 AM

Warthog: The Muthaship: Warthog: So he:

1) cheated.
2) covered up that he cheated.
3) lied about cheating.
4) lied about covering up that he cheated.
5) Got caught.
6) Continued to lie.
7) Got caught again.
8) Realized he couldn't lie his way out of it.
9) Got banned and expunged from the record books, so he had nothing left to lose.
10) Decided to admit to everything in a final cash grab.

Do I have that right?  One hell of a ten step program there, Mr. Armstrong.

You left out that he received money from people he sued because they said he cheated when he was cheating, but lied well enough in court to convince the jury that his accusers were lying, and he's keeping the money.

Shoot, you're right.   I hereby nominate Lance Armstrong as Biggest Douche in the History of Sports.  Anyone have someone to one-up him?


This has probably been said before in this thread, but as an Austinite, Lance has been a douche to several people I've spoken too, especially restaurant waitstaff. Ask anyone who has had the 'pleasure' of serving him at Moonshine.
 
2013-01-15 01:23:26 AM
I still think that if he passed the tests of the day for the races in question under the test types available then he won the other part of the race. 1. Physical race 2. Mental 3. Political. That being said what do I know? He made his bed and now has to use the crusty sheets he made worshipping himself for all those years.

Knowing he walked out on his family made me have a distain for him. Seeing him walk right past his kid after a triathalon last year as she was screaming "daddy daddy" sealed the deal for me. DB
 
2013-01-15 01:23:32 AM
Newsflash: Athletes do drugs to boost performance.

Thanks Romerovision. I am now informed citizen.
 
2013-01-15 01:25:56 AM
7 Tour De France wins against a field of dopers, but he was clean.

That's what you dumbass Lance apologists believed.

You stupid f*cks.
 
2013-01-15 01:31:03 AM
I'm tempted to go back to older threads about this cheating asshole and post a list of all the people that were defending him as being clean.
 
2013-01-15 01:31:20 AM

Werepig: It's pretty easy to sit here and pass judgment on Lance for cheating but have you ever stopped and thought, I mean really thought, about what you would do if you were put in his situation? You are arguably one of the best in the world at something but as luck would have it everybody who is also one of the best at this same thing is cheating. So you have two choices. You either cheat and win massive amounts of fame and fortune or you stand by your principles and watch the best in the world get smaller and smaller as they ride away from you. If you really think about it it's not that easy of a question to answer.


Well, I know one thing; if you don't want the next guy to have to make that decision, you have to clean up the sport. You can't do that if you allow the accomplishments and records of the previous, doping generation to stand.
 
2013-01-15 01:34:27 AM

Popcorn Johnny: I'm tempted to go back to older threads about this cheating asshole and post a list of all the people that were defending him as being clean.


I fully support that.

It would be hilarious to look at the delusional morons defending this sh*t bag.

For 14 f*cking years.
 
2013-01-15 01:35:30 AM

Mitrovarr: Werepig: [snip]

Well, I know one thing; if you don't want the next guy to have to make that decision, you have to clean up the sport. You can't do that if you allow the accomplishments and records of the previous, doping generation to stand.


I don't think it can be cleaned up. Perhaps we should just ignore the sport into oblivion? I'm ok with this -- I'm never watching one again and will look down on anyone who does.
 
2013-01-15 01:57:39 AM
For her next trick, Oprah will persuade Jerry Sandusky to confess and apologize for humping little boys ...
 
2013-01-15 02:02:37 AM

moefuggenbrew: Don't care, never did.


Good thing you told us that, otherwise we wouldn't have known. This changes everything.
 
2013-01-15 02:14:59 AM
Rot in hell you cheating scumball.
 
2013-01-15 02:30:53 AM
Equally sad about this is that the man had testicular cancer and if I am not mistaken those male hormones he took stimulate testicular cells to grow. He may wind up with a heck of a lot more than he bargained for someday. He was an inspiration to my bike riding and so I feel very sad about all of this.......
 
2013-01-15 02:46:43 AM

SirGeorgeBurkelwitzIII: I love his arrogance and dickishness for some reason. He's such an asshole that it actual makes me like him more.


Sure; he's an alpha. If you're gonna do something, you gotta go all-out. Ball to the wall, so to speak. Be proud of how badly you can fark people in the Alps.
 
2013-01-15 02:55:09 AM
Does this mean I should tell my GF about the GoGo juice I used last night to rattle her cage ?

/Why can't secrets be secrets !?!
 
2013-01-15 03:00:13 AM
*looks around the room*

Any current or former pro athletes in here flipping out about the morality of PEDs? No?

Didn't think so.

Dumbass armchair nancy fans want their guy to do anything to win. Then they crucify him for it when he does.
 
2013-01-15 03:28:34 AM

joonyer: Dumbass armchair nancy fans want their guy to do anything to win.


Not many fans want "their guy" to lie and cheat his way to victory, dumbass.
 
2013-01-15 03:30:58 AM

The Southern Dandy: million


Tell me again how it cost $31 mil to sponsor a guy riding a bicycle...
 
2013-01-15 03:32:09 AM
So... Does this mean he will also help to repair the reputations and lives of people he ruined over knowledge of his doping? In particular the poor gentleman who had to move to another continent to get away from the vitriol spewing from Armstrong and his supporters?
 
2013-01-15 03:35:47 AM
Whoops, sorry, not a new continent, New Zealand.

Article if anyone wants a long refresher: Link
 
2013-01-15 03:45:58 AM
By the way, I'm pretty sure he did dope, but, you know, this confession probably shouldn't change anybody's mind. Seriously.

Postulate for a moment that he's innocent, and was banned unjustly. Just for a minute. He can't go back in time and give additional samples to test, right? If he's innocent, there's no actual way he can prove it, right? No matter how loudly he proclaims his innocence, he's stuck.

But, he wants to participate in triathlons. Which means he needs to get unbanned.

Well, the only way he can get unbanned is by making an apology. And the people who banned him aren't going to count "I'm sorry that you're wrong" as an apology, are they? They're going to demand he apologize for doping, whether he was really innocent or not. So, assuming he was 100% innocent, he'd still have to say he doped, in order to have a chance to get rid of the ban, right?

So all this stuff on OWN? Is proof that he wants to be unbanned. And nothing more.
 
2013-01-15 03:57:51 AM

Verzio: By the way, I'm pretty sure he did dope, but, you know, this confession probably shouldn't change anybody's mind. Seriously.

Postulate for a moment that he's innocent, and was banned unjustly. Just for a minute. He can't go back in time and give additional samples to test, right? If he's innocent, there's no actual way he can prove it, right? No matter how loudly he proclaims his innocence, he's stuck.

But, he wants to participate in triathlons. Which means he needs to get unbanned.

Well, the only way he can get unbanned is by making an apology. And the people who banned him aren't going to count "I'm sorry that you're wrong" as an apology, are they? They're going to demand he apologize for doping, whether he was really innocent or not. So, assuming he was 100% innocent, he'd still have to say he doped, in order to have a chance to get rid of the ban, right?

So all this stuff on OWN? Is proof that he wants to be unbanned. And nothing more.


He must REALLY farking want to do triathlons.
 
2013-01-15 04:00:26 AM
So when will he be paying out the people he's defamed and sued over the years for (correctly) calling him a doper?
 
2013-01-15 04:05:59 AM
i6.photobucket.com
 
2013-01-15 04:23:19 AM
As a non-car-owning cyclist with tens of thousands on miles on the clock, professional cycling was one of the few sports I followed. Like sailing, which I also do, technological advances in cycling end up on the street, and the (clearly apparent) purity of seeing humans work a relatively simple machine to ascend mountains and maintain high speeds on the flats was inspiring to me.

Doping has pretty well killed that for me over the last 15 years or so, and Armstrong and his cowardly denials are at the front of that funeral march. Not to Godwin this up, but knowing that the good his cancer charity did was built on his artificially and duplictious achievements in sport, any excuse-making for his consistent betrayals sounds like "but Hitler liked dogs and built the Autobahn".

It entirely misses the point. I don't believe his admissions of doping are any more complete and accurate than his denials of doping were.

Bah. I hope the remaining nut falls off.
 
2013-01-15 04:37:31 AM

Warthog: So he:

1) cheated.
2) covered up that he cheated.
3) lied about cheating.
4) lied about covering up that he cheated.
5) Got caught.
6) Continued to lie.
7) Got caught again.
8) Realized he couldn't lie his way out of it.
9) Got banned and expunged from the record books, so he had nothing left to lose.
10) Decided to admit to everything in a final cash grab.

Do I have that right?  One hell of a ten step program there, Mr. Armstrong.



you forgot "bullied, harrased, threatened and attempted to ruin/portray as crazy/jealous anyone who called him out"
 
2013-01-15 04:43:59 AM

chumboobler: Warthog: So he:

1) cheated.
2) covered up that he cheated.
3) lied about cheating.
4) lied about covering up that he cheated.
5) Got caught.
6) Continued to lie.
7) Got caught again.
8) Realized he couldn't lie his way out of it.
9) Got banned and expunged from the record books, so he had nothing left to lose.
10) Decided to admit to everything in a final cash grab.

Do I have that right?  One hell of a ten step program there, Mr. Armstrong.

He did all that. I will not deny it. He will no longer deny it. His foundation has helped thousands of people. Do good deeds that bring a greater good not outdo a failure of the past? In spite of what the outcome now may be, for years his story has inspired many with cancer to fight. It has given hope to many. Yes he cheated to win at an ultra high level sporting event multiple times. That was wrong. Denying it was also wrong. The level of good his foundation has done should not be forgotten. His fame was based on cheating but he used that fame in the right way. He helped people with it. He helped himself too but he has helped thousands of cancer sufferers and their families. That should not be forgotten. Overall the effect has been a positive one for many many people. To deny that is not right.


"You robbed a bank and terrorized people by holding them hostage. But at least you gave a portion to helping starving kids so you're okay in my books..."
 
2013-01-15 04:52:05 AM
As a legit question...wouldn't he have to take testosterone to make up for the fact he has one ball? Not for riding on a bike for but living a normal male life.
 
2013-01-15 04:53:36 AM
I can't believe people are calling him 'brave' or thinking this is somehow honorable.
 
2013-01-15 05:58:43 AM
IIRC, he never failed a drug test during his cycling career, which means he was somewhat better at cheating than all of the cyclists who keep failing drug tests.
 
2013-01-15 06:01:53 AM

Cybernetic: IIRC, he never failed a drug test during his cycling career, which means he was somewhat better at cheating than all of the cyclists who keep failing drug tests.


Yep, he had a sophisticated cheat system. Don't kid yourself, a lot of pro athletes. teams and olympic programs have "beat the system" cheats in place too.
 
2013-01-15 06:04:19 AM

Warthog: So he:

1) cheated.
2) covered up that he cheated.
3) lied about cheating.
4) lied about covering up that he cheated.
5) Got caught.
6) Continued to lie.
7) Got caught again.
8) Realized he couldn't lie his way out of it.
9) Got banned and expunged from the record books, so he had nothing left to lose.
10) Decided to admit to everything in a final cash grab.

Do I have that right?  One hell of a ten step program there, Mr. Armstrong.


It's 10 small steps for a man...
 
2013-01-15 06:33:13 AM

Popcorn Johnny: I'm tempted to go back to older threads about this cheating asshole and post a list of all the people that were defending him as being clean.


Yeah.

I wonder how they feel now. :D
 
2013-01-15 07:13:33 AM

Valiente: As a non-car-owning cyclist with tens of thousands on miles on the clock, professional cycling was one of the few sports I followed. Like sailing, which I also do, technological advances in cycling end up on the street, and the (clearly apparent) purity of seeing humans work a relatively simple machine to ascend mountains and maintain high speeds on the flats was inspiring to me.

Doping has pretty well killed that for me over the last 15 years or so, and Armstrong and his cowardly denials are at the front of that funeral march. Not to Godwin this up, but knowing that the good his cancer charity did was built on his artificially and duplictious achievements in sport, any excuse-making for his consistent betrayals sounds like "but Hitler liked dogs and built the Autobahn".

It entirely misses the point. I don't believe his admissions of doping are any more complete and accurate than his denials of doping were.

Bah. I hope the remaining nut falls off.


I always hated cyclists, and now I know why! Who measures miles with a clock?! Do you measure interstellar distances in parsecs?!
 
2013-01-15 07:17:11 AM

CokeBear: So? Its not like they can take away his moon landing.


Lance Armstrong didn't land on the moon, it was his brother Louis.
 
2013-01-15 08:21:16 AM
i farking shiat he cheated. everyone in sports does. not sure why everyone chooses to lie about it.
 
2013-01-15 08:34:32 AM

Popcorn Johnny: I'm tempted to go back to older threads about this cheating asshole and post a list of all the people that were defending him as being clean.


I wonder how many of them are now affecting world-weary "meh, everyone else cheated, too" attitudes.
 
2013-01-15 08:40:32 AM
But but but....butt cancer.
 
2013-01-15 08:48:31 AM

moefuggenbrew: Don't care, never did.


Wow. That means when you actually DO care about something the contributing comments will be of epic proportions! We eagerly await your bombshell retorts and please don't make us wait too much we can only stand the tingle for so long.
 
2013-01-15 08:51:39 AM
Havn't read TFA yet but $5 says his "admission" will come down to "I'm really sorry I doped BUT...".
 
2013-01-15 08:57:13 AM
Warthog: So he:

1) cheated.
2) covered up that he cheated.
3) lied about cheating.
4) lied about covering up that he cheated.
5) Got caught.
6) Continued to lie.
7) Got caught again.
8) Realized he couldn't lie his way out of it.
9) Got banned and expunged from the record books, so he had nothing left to lose.
10) Decided to admit to everything in a final cash grab.

Do I have that right? One hell of a ten step program there, Mr. Armstrong.



How about Ten steps for douche, Ten giant leaps for douchekind?
 
2013-01-15 09:22:17 AM

LessO2: That took some a ball to admit.

 
2013-01-15 09:33:17 AM
After the Barry Bond and Sammy Sosa thing,  I never watched baseball again.  But I learned my lesson :P
This, doesn't surprise me.  In fact, we all expected it.  Phelps is next.  If he's smart he'll "Retire" early before they start questioning him too much.
 
2013-01-15 09:53:10 AM
Cal Ripken Jr is just lucky he retired before all this shiat.
 
2013-01-15 10:34:03 AM

doubled99: Cal Ripken Jr is just lucky he retired before all this shiat.


No shiat, Bobby Fischer too for that matter.
 
2013-01-15 10:37:11 AM

Verzio: Postulate for a moment that he's innocent, and was banned unjustly. Just for a minute. He can't go back in time and give additional samples to test, right? If he's innocent, there's no actual way he can prove it, right? No matter how loudly he proclaims his innocence, he's stuck.

But, he wants to participate in triathlons. Which means he needs to get unbanned.

Well, the only way he can get unbanned is by making an apology. ...


Because integrity. I think that that's what's gotten me down in the last ten years or so -- people everywhere (particularly business leaders and politicians) seem to become outraged about the smallest things, but even then don't feel the need to display personal integrity themselves. If he was innocent, he should not say he was guilty just to be able to participate in triathlons. Admitting to that without being guilty would also show integrity.

He's a scumbag, and it's really great that he started a seeminglly effective charity, but in no way can that make up for the things he took that he didn't deserve. People look up to public figures, particularly those in sports, and his fans have to deal with having looked up to someone who turns out to be just another lying scumbag. Great -- contribute all of your ill-gotten gains and use your undeserved celebrity to convince others to contribute. Of course, now you've got hundreds of thousands of people who've worn stupid yellow bracelets for years as a badge that they looked up to a liar.

Fark him.
 
2013-01-15 10:38:39 AM

mofa: Admitting to that without being guilty would also show a lack of integrity.

 
2013-01-15 10:47:14 AM
Not buying this latest smeer campaign
Never failed a test
 
2013-01-15 11:00:20 AM
To summarize:
1) Cycling Hate.
2) Everyone else doped so he's still a winner to me.
3) I don't care about cycling, why should I care you should all read my posts in this thread.
4) Fark Lance.

Cycling Hate, get over it.

Not everyone else doped on every sponsored team, but a lot did, to the point that there may never will be a winner for these Tours. This is a very un-American concept to not have a winner, especially in a timed "individual" sport (which grands tours aren't,) but to make this work out in your mind just think USC football, or Michigan basketball vacated titles.

If you don't care, why are you in this thread.

As for Lance, screw him. He was an a-hole to his team, to other riders, to his now vindicated accusers, and should be a reminder to everyone that winning isn't everything.
 
2013-01-15 11:12:04 AM

Confabulat: joonyer: Dumbass armchair nancy fans want their guy to do anything to win.

Not many fans want "their guy" to lie and cheat his way to victory, dumbass.


Yeah, save that for the politics.
 
2013-01-15 11:16:18 AM

Warthog: So he:

1) cheated.
2) covered up that he cheated.
3) lied about cheating.
4) lied about covering up that he cheated.
5) Got caught.
6) Continued to lie.
7) Got caught again.
8) Realized he couldn't lie his way out of it.
9) Got banned and expunged from the record books, so he had nothing left to lose.
10) Decided to admit to everything in a final cash grab.

Do I have that right?  One hell of a ten step program there, Mr. Armstrong.


Considering there's pretty much nothing he can ever do to earn a living, and he's probably going to live another 35-40 years, he's got to make bank where he can and this might be his last payday for a good long while.
 
2013-01-15 11:30:46 AM

octopied: chumboobler: Warthog: So he:

1) cheated.
2) covered up that he cheated.
3) lied about cheating.
4) lied about covering up that he cheated.
5) Got caught.
6) Continued to lie.
7) Got caught again.
8) Realized he couldn't lie his way out of it.
9) Got banned and expunged from the record books, so he had nothing left to lose.
10) Decided to admit to everything in a final cash grab.

Do I have that right?  One hell of a ten step program there, Mr. Armstrong.

He did all that. I will not deny it. He will no longer deny it. His foundation has helped thousands of people. Do good deeds that bring a greater good not outdo a failure of the past? In spite of what the outcome now may be, for years his story has inspired many with cancer to fight. It has given hope to many. Yes he cheated to win at an ultra high level sporting event multiple times. That was wrong. Denying it was also wrong. The level of good his foundation has done should not be forgotten. His fame was based on cheating but he used that fame in the right way. He helped people with it. He helped himself too but he has helped thousands of cancer sufferers and their families. That should not be forgotten. Overall the effect has been a positive one for many many people. To deny that is not right.

"You robbed a bank and terrorized people by holding them hostage. But at least you gave a portion to helping starving kids so you're okay in my books..."


No, no, no, go big: Hey, you brutalized all of Europe and slaughtered millions, but you advanced the science of rocketry that resulted in man landing on the moon, advanced the development of modern mass-produced automobiles, and created the mechanized infrastructure we now know as the superhighway. Put Hugo Boss on the map, too.
 
2013-01-15 11:34:16 AM
You should be thanking Lance Armstrong and Livestrong. Most of you wouldn't even know about cancer had it not been for his foundation raising awareness of cancer. So what if they didn't raise money for treatment, research, or prevention. That pales in comparison to raising awareness that cancer exists. Before Lance it was often debated like global warming or Jesus. But Lance proved cancer was real and could be defeated! Livestrong!
 
2013-01-15 11:41:48 AM

Verzio: By the way, I'm pretty sure he did dope, but, you know, this confession probably shouldn't change anybody's mind. Seriously.

Postulate for a moment that he's innocent, and was banned unjustly. Just for a minute. He can't go back in time and give additional samples to test, right? If he's innocent, there's no actual way he can prove it, right? No matter how loudly he proclaims his innocence, he's stuck.

But, he wants to participate in triathlons. Which means he needs to get unbanned.

Well, the only way he can get unbanned is by making an apology. And the people who banned him aren't going to count "I'm sorry that you're wrong" as an apology, are they? They're going to demand he apologize for doping, whether he was really innocent or not. So, assuming he was 100% innocent, he'd still have to say he doped, in order to have a chance to get rid of the ban, right?

So all this stuff on OWN? Is proof that he wants to be unbanned. And nothing more.


Do you honestly believe that? I sure hope not
 
2013-01-15 11:45:12 AM
Oh bollock...
 
2013-01-15 12:02:55 PM
As if everyone didn't already know. He just put up a better fight than most to protect his fortune and charity.

I don't care in the least. PED's are everywhere in professional sports, and especially bad in cycling.

You have to be a great athlete and on PED's to win the tour once.
You have to be one of the greatest superior athletes and on PED's to win the tour 7 times in a row.

It's not like you can be an average Joe and take a few drugs and win the tour. You have to train for years and years to just qualify, then step up training to even compete, much less win.

Drugs or not, the guy has worked his ass off to get where he is today, and done more than anyone I can think of to support cancer victims.
/No love lost
 
2013-01-15 12:09:17 PM
The man is a classic psychopath: Ruthless, doesn't care about social norms or morals, and is willing to use other peoples' willingness to believe in peoples' adherence to ethical behaviour as an edge.
 
2013-01-15 12:15:51 PM
You know, I've spent more time reading this thread than watching him race.

What's bad for the world is good for FARK.

So, Farkstrong Lance, without you, the water cooler would be boring this week.
 
2013-01-15 12:39:52 PM
As Lewis Black said, this cancer survivor won seven Tour De France races, so the question isn't "Was he doping?", the question is "Why aren't we ALL doping?"
 
2013-01-15 01:00:20 PM
fark you Lance. fark you for what you did to Greg LeMond.
 
2013-01-15 01:05:06 PM
At last out long national nightmare is over. Everyone can sleep peacefully tonight.
 
2013-01-15 01:21:18 PM
And to this day, no one is concerned about the rampant use of performance-enhancing drugs in the PBA.
 
2013-01-15 01:39:20 PM

Ex-Texan: It's ok to hte on Armstrong, given the fact He's vehemenly denied it for so long, then fesses up after he's made a boatload of cash Whoring him self out, then discreetly sayinghe may repay the USPS for some of their sponsorship money.
And for those myopic/uneducated folk, get the d*ck out of you ass/mouth/both, put down your closeout Walmart Camos, and get some exercise. I'm surprised a lot more of you haters don't get winded using the remotecontrol.
/Just bought a 29" mountain bike
//Don't ride anywhere near the miserable, hating, Homo fat farks.
///Doing a 7day,700 mile ride in Colorado come summer. Your Hoverround doesn't have the batteries to carry Hating, obese fat farks like you.

i0.kym-cdn.com
 
2013-01-15 02:21:04 PM

octopied: Warthog: So he:

1) cheated.
2) covered up that he cheated.
3) lied about cheating.
4) lied about covering up that he cheated.
5) Got caught.
6) Continued to lie.
7) Got caught again.
8) Realized he couldn't lie his way out of it.
9) Got banned and expunged from the record books, so he had nothing left to lose.
10) Decided to admit to everything in a final cash grab.

Do I have that right?  One hell of a ten step program there, Mr. Armstrong.


you forgot "bullied, harrased, threatened and attempted to ruin/portray as crazy/jealous anyone who called him out"


And that's Armstrong's biggest problem. That he cheated in a sport that I don't watch where apparently everyone cheats doesn't cause me to lose much sleep. That he obtained libel judgments against people who he knew were telling the truth and launched well funded PR campaigns to ruin those who called him out is a sin of an entirely different magnitude.
 
2013-01-15 02:51:49 PM

octopied: Warthog: So he:

1) cheated.
2) covered up that he cheated.
3) lied about cheating.
4) lied about covering up that he cheated.
5) Got caught.
6) Continued to lie.
7) Got caught again.
8) Realized he couldn't lie his way out of it.
9) Got banned and expunged from the record books, so he had nothing left to lose.
10) Decided to admit to everything in a final cash grab.

Do I have that right?  One hell of a ten step program there, Mr. Armstrong.

you forgot "bullied, harrased, threatened and attempted to ruin/portray as crazy/jealous anyone who called him out"


He also supplied drugs to other riders on his team, and kicked riders off his team if they refused to dope. The guy wasn't just a doper, he was also in charge of a criminal enterprise to facilitate doping.
 
2013-01-15 04:35:34 PM

DiggidyDan: Stupid Roadies. . . Ned Overend and Hans Rey are my cycling heroes!


Rode with Hans Rey many years ago when he happened to be at mountain bike trail I frequented in South Florida. Super cool that he rode easy with us.

/end csb
 
2013-01-15 08:57:46 PM
Hey, my friend with benefits has just as many tour-de-france titles as Lance...

...but twice as many testicles!

/zing
 
2013-01-16 01:51:49 AM
I hope that a near-sighted, rabid weasel with dull teeth gnaws off his other nut.
 
2013-01-16 02:19:35 AM

machoprogrammer: Verzio: By the way, I'm pretty sure he did dope, but, you know, this confession probably shouldn't change anybody's mind. Seriously.

Postulate for a moment that he's innocent, and was banned unjustly. Just for a minute. He can't go back in time and give additional samples to test, right? If he's innocent, there's no actual way he can prove it, right? No matter how loudly he proclaims his innocence, he's stuck.

But, he wants to participate in triathlons. Which means he needs to get unbanned.

Well, the only way he can get unbanned is by making an apology. And the people who banned him aren't going to count "I'm sorry that you're wrong" as an apology, are they? They're going to demand he apologize for doping, whether he was really innocent or not. So, assuming he was 100% innocent, he'd still have to say he doped, in order to have a chance to get rid of the ban, right?

So all this stuff on OWN? Is proof that he wants to be unbanned. And nothing more.

Do you honestly believe that? I sure hope not


Which part do you hope I don't believe? That Armstrong did dope (now marked in bold), or that people will lie if it's to their advantage?
 
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