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(Evansville Courier Press)   HOA president: You may not use our name in any article. Evansville Courier & Press: Stonecreek, Stonecreek, Stonecreek   (courierpress.com) divider line 65
    More: Dumbass, HOA, Vanderburgh County, common areas, small claims court, covenants, Evansville Courier, Roch Dupre  
•       •       •

27299 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Jan 2013 at 3:05 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2013-01-14 02:20:07 PM
14 votes:
1.bp.blogspot.com

STONECREEK! STONECREEK! STONECREEK! STONECREEK!
2013-01-14 01:45:32 PM
8 votes:
Step one: let the petty tyrants sue you.
Step two: seek attorneys fees when you bounce their frivolous suit right out of court.
Step three: record the judgment for attorneys fees and slap a lien on their house.
Step four: LOL.
2013-01-14 02:45:29 PM
6 votes:

CapeFearCadaver: GAT_00: CapeFearCadaver: Is Stephen Hess short? I'll bet he's shorter than a great dane.

[napoleonireland.com image 418x550]

Napoleon was actually 5'7", quite normal for that day.

Lighten up,[antspiderbee.net image 721x893]


Lighten up, bacon?  I don't get-....

Oh.
2013-01-14 02:39:11 PM
6 votes:
Who knew Dino MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMMMMMM Zaffina became a HOA President?
2013-01-14 03:28:32 PM
5 votes:
i171.photobucket.com
2013-01-14 03:27:43 PM
5 votes:
4.bp.blogspot.com
RIGHT.... who threw that?

"Well, he DID say 'Stonecreek'..."
2013-01-14 06:58:06 PM
4 votes:

Mr_Fabulous: I was the president of a condo HOA once. Didn't want the job, really... but I was already on the board as VP when the president of 12 years quit in a huff.

Some dumbass actually called me in the middle of the night because there was a raccoon on his back steps. I advised him to throw things at it and make loud noises.


You should have fined him for having an unauthorized pet.
2013-01-14 04:19:44 PM
4 votes:
Hey guys, HOA's can also provide security for your apartment complex or neighborhood.

2.bp.blogspot.com

By friendly residents in your community!!!!
2013-01-14 03:47:16 PM
4 votes:
I have a dream that one day I will buy the lot next to a planned community with a HOA. They will have white houses with black doors and mailboxes in the same shade of brown all 34.25 inches from the ground. My house will be painted two colors and the door will have large polka dots and the mailbox will be something I made while learning to weld. When they look at me the will see the freedom they can never taste
2013-01-14 02:44:05 PM
4 votes:

GAT_00: CapeFearCadaver: Is Stephen Hess short? I'll bet he's shorter than a great dane.

[napoleonireland.com image 418x550]

Napoleon was actually 5'7", quite normal for that day.


Lighten up,antspiderbee.net
2013-01-14 03:30:12 PM
3 votes:
2013-01-14 03:19:53 PM
3 votes:

CapeFearCadaver: Is Stephen Hess short? I'll bet he's shorter than a great dane.

[napoleonireland.com image 418x550]


blogs.laweekly.com
A contender appears!
2013-01-14 03:14:51 PM
3 votes:

Citrate1007: HoA's tend to be ran by Tea Party types that get off on their micro-fascist power trips.


Umm, no. HOAs are liberals, they want to control everything, tax everything, run everything.

Liberals LOVE HOAs. They want to turn the country into a giant HOA.
2013-01-14 03:10:55 PM
3 votes:
This needs to be made a proper meme. All nine of you that are on twitter need to hashtag everything #stonecreek
2013-01-14 07:03:18 PM
2 votes:

Rent Party: jst3p: Rent Party: jst3phark And Molly Ziegler: Rent Party: I am God. Prove I'm not.

Well, I believe you're God. Where do I send money?

I am a better God, I will let you eat pork. I accept pay pal. EiP.

Hey, you can do all of that with Me, too, and I'll even throw in a set of knives and a toaster!

God doesn't botch simple HTML. My children! Rise up and put the heathan imposter to death!

It was a test! Tie that HTML up and sacrifice it, or I will know you do not truly love Me.


My children! If you weigh Rent Party you will see he weighs the same as a duck! Don't be fooled!
2013-01-14 04:50:38 PM
2 votes:

jamesmusik: They put up a phone call with the guy. It's pure genius.

http://www.courierpress.com/videos/detail/a-conversation-with-stonec re ek-hoa-president-steph/


Best part was all the "if you write an article about us we'll sue you" interspersed with "you'd better put this information about us in your article!"
2013-01-14 03:35:22 PM
2 votes:
"Furthermore, this notice also requires you not to at any measure mention anything regarding my name, any resident of Stonecreek, NOR will we ALLOW any of your printing in any article regarding Stonecreek at any time in any publication," the message stated. "You will be held liable for any violations of this letter and notice/request in this email. If we find/discover you have mentioned Stonecreek in any legal matter their (sic) will be action toward yourself as well as any print paper you represent in the media article.

"You may contact any HOA in the County of Vanderburgh, the State of Indiana, but Stonecreek will not PERMIT OR ALLOW YOU our legal name in any future article."


assets.flavorwire.com

Truly, you have a dizzying intellect...

"violations of this letter"?? Since when has your letter been capable of establishing law?

I'll violate your letter. I'll tear off your letter's envelope and throw it to the ground, and ravish it over and over and....
2013-01-14 03:18:49 PM
2 votes:
The rule of Stone Creek is never talk about Stone Creek.
2013-01-14 03:09:46 PM
2 votes:
Stonecreek, Stonecreek, Streisand...er, Stonecreek.
2013-01-14 03:09:40 PM
2 votes:

scottydoesntknow: They sure pissed my mom off when she apparently didn't paint her mailbox an "approved color", but she was happy when they made the people down the street re-paint the trim of their house after deciding to go with a godawful pink color.


So your mom is a hypocrite?
2013-01-14 02:56:13 PM
2 votes:
I like how the news site's very next line after reprinting the "don't use the name Stonecreek" email was:

'A powerful tool'

LOL.
2013-01-14 02:26:58 PM
2 votes:
Hess, who identifies himself as president, treasurer and legal agent of the Stonecreek HOA

That seems like a conflict of interest...

My parent's HOA wasn't too bad. They sure pissed my mom off when she apparently didn't paint her mailbox an "approved color", but she was happy when they made the people down the street re-paint the trim of their house after deciding to go with a godawful pink color. And they also made the guy a couple streets down take down his Christmas decorations cause it was early April. Apprently his wife left him after the holidays or something and that was one of the few things that made him happy. But it was a little excessive (like 5 giant inflatables). He moved 'em into his garage and still inflates them.
2013-01-14 01:38:00 PM
2 votes:
It's showwwwwwwwwwwwtime!
2013-01-14 07:56:01 PM
1 votes:

jamesmusik: They put up a phone call with the guy. It's pure genius.

http://www.courierpress.com/videos/detail/a-conversation-with-stonec re ek-hoa-president-steph/


Lol apparently the paper is in "legal legal LEGAL" violation. I wonder if that's worse than double-secret legal violation.
2013-01-14 06:57:05 PM
1 votes:

Rent Party: jst3phark And Molly Ziegler: Rent Party: I am God. Prove I'm not.

Well, I believe you're God. Where do I send money?

I am a better God, I will let you eat pork. I accept pay pal. EiP.

Hey, you can do all of that with Me, too, and I'll even throw in a set of knives and a toaster!


God doesn't botch simple HTML. My children! Rise up and put the heathan imposter to death!
2013-01-14 06:50:31 PM
1 votes:

Huck And Molly Ziegler: Rent Party: I am God. Prove I'm not.

Well, I believe you're God. Where do I send money?


I am a better God, I will let you eat pork. I accept pay pal. EiP.
2013-01-14 05:59:48 PM
1 votes:
The only thing that would have made TFA better:

"Stonecreek HOA President Stephen Hess - whom we will refer to as Mister Nanny Nanny Boo-Boo - ... ... ..."
2013-01-14 05:13:21 PM
1 votes:

SpiderQueenDemon: ArgusRun: Yay. Phone call between the reporter and Hess:

Link

This is absolute comedy gold. Take a shot every time the HOA guy says 'sue' or gets a legal term wrong.


Most people would be dead within the first minute.
2013-01-14 05:12:50 PM
1 votes:
Meh, my house isn't in an HOA and I'm not bothered by anything my neighbors do.  Admittedly I'm more likely to be the person that bothers them,  though.

That shed on my property?  Yes, it's an eyesore.  No, I don't know what's in it.  I figure the termites will just finish it off in a few years, and then, hey, problem solved.
2013-01-14 04:52:33 PM
1 votes:

Endive Wombat: Apparently YEARS back when the set of track homes was being built, it was built against a large piece of property owned by a single owner. So this enterprising owner builds like 20 houses that look almost exactly the same as the adjacent track homes, but with bigger lots and not part of any HOA and sells off the homes.


Cash in on the new construction AND troll a HOA in one fell swoop? Brilliant.
2013-01-14 04:42:32 PM
1 votes:
HOAs and me are incompatible.

I like to weld, burn shiat and blow crap up.

If I could fire guns in my backyard I would.

I like to let my grass grow long sometimes for the hell of it.

My Christmas decorations were all UV based this year, it was creepy.

That Stonecreek dick can bite me.
2013-01-14 04:31:16 PM
1 votes:
I'm the current president of our building's HOA, and I've done damn near everything in my power to make sure the stupid stays out.

"Her drapes aren't the right color! The building front isn't uniform!"
"While we're on the subject ma'am, you're the only one who uses vertical blinds. If you want her to replace her drapes, I want you to replace yours."

"Her girlfriend parks out front! Overnight! It's not moral!"
"Her fiancee parks out front overnight. Just like yours did. Welcome to Iowa."

"The driveway is blocked! What are you going to do about it?"
"It's the middle of a blizzard. I think I'm doing it right now."
2013-01-14 04:28:55 PM
1 votes:
STONECREEK! Where the demons dwell
Where the banshees live and they do live well!
STONECREEK! Where a man is a man
And the children dance to the pipes of Pan!

And you my love, won't you take my hand?
We'll go back in time to that mystic land
Where assessments are due, and they're due right now
I will sue your ass, I will show you how!

And where are they now...the l'il children of STONECREEK?
And where would we be, if we were here...tonight?
2013-01-14 04:27:01 PM
1 votes:

LordJiro: Thunderpipes: Citrate1007: HoA's tend to be ran by Tea Party types that get off on their micro-fascist power trips.

Umm, no. HOAs are liberals, they want to control everything, tax everything, run everything.

Liberals LOVE HOAs. They want to turn the country into a giant HOA.

The word you both are looking for is 'Authoritarian'. Authoritarians can be on the right or left.


Every single thing doesn't have to be liberal or conservative. Although I find the idea of conservatives in the minority in HOAs laughable.

Property values!
2013-01-14 04:16:57 PM
1 votes:

Day_Old_Dutchie: Thudfark: Someone named Hess with delusions of grandeur and a penchant for the tyrannical? Colour me shocked.

At the risk of 'godwinning' this thread, I'd say he had the perfect name for an HOA president. (Along with Eichmann, Speer and Goebbels)


I'm waiting for him to steal a plane and fly to England in the hopes of negotiating an unofficial peace with the newspaper.
2013-01-14 04:04:28 PM
1 votes:
I'm the left-est most liberal of liberal of liberals. My heart bleeds blue. I worship Obama as the next coming of Jesus Christ. I'm an atheist, a tax-payer, and I love the gays.

I would never, ever live in a house that has an HOA.
2013-01-14 04:01:35 PM
1 votes:
Rob and Laura Approve...

www.geektress.com
/X-Files Arcadia
2013-01-14 03:57:26 PM
1 votes:
Tom_Slick:
A few years ago when people were making the switch to HD with Directv the installer came through and add the new dish to the homes that had it, they did not take down the old round dishes, we all got letters stating, "All Satellite Dishes not in use must be removed by X date the HOA will have a contractor in the area to remove the dish if the homeowner would like assistance on X date." I thought wow seems reasonable, but someone took them to court and apparently you can't force people to remove dishes not in use even when paying for the labor. They never tried again.

They should have tried the "honey" approach. I'm sure if they'd called the old dish removal a "free service courtesy your HOA" everyone would have taken them up on it. But that doesn't scream "Respect mah authoriteeeee."

Footnote to my story. When the HOA had the streets resurfaced they skipped over the segment in front of my house. I tell the pizza guy, "When the street suddenly goes to shiat, then you're here."
2013-01-14 03:50:31 PM
1 votes:
When you take title to the property, you take title subject to everything of record regarding that property, and those covenants and restrictions would be an item of record," Frank said. "Bylaws are voted on by lot owners, so if they already are implemented at the time you buy your lot, then you know there's an association and you can get a copy of those before you purchase it. It's just due diligence."

The information is available in the Recorder's Office in Room 231 of the Civic Center in Downtown Evansville.


You can't miss the room, it's a disused lavatory with a sign on the door reading "Beware of the leopard."
2013-01-14 03:49:30 PM
1 votes:

Elzar: I've lived in an HOA, it was an outrage! My property value didn't go down, my neighbors weren't allowed to park their broke down cars on the front lawn and I wasn't even able to call the cops on my neighbors for them not blasting music into the wee hours of the morning.


I don't pay an HOA, and that happens to me all the time. My property has appreciated, my neighbors are so quiet it's almost spooky, and if anyone can hear music, it's me.
2013-01-14 03:49:26 PM
1 votes:

Fano: Farkers that defend hoas typically tell you that if you don't have an hoa, all your neighbors will let the grass get ten feet tall, leave rusting cars and dead dogs on their front lawn, and paint their house plaid with a middle finger pointed at your bedroom window.


Hey, my grass only gets to about 1.5 feet tall at the most!

And that car isn't rusted, and it still runs, it just needs some work (actually trying to sell it).

Plus, it's not my fault the dogs want to drag deer carcasses into the front yard and chew on them. I use the bones to make totems to ward of evil spirits.

And I will fix my mailbox eventually, after I get my neighbor to admit that he hit it with his combine and pay for it!

/this is all true, except for the totems part, but I am thinking about using them in a Halloween costume next year. Other then that, I keep the place pretty tidy.
//has no visible neighbors
2013-01-14 03:47:41 PM
1 votes:
HOA. No. Farkin'. Way.

When I was house shopping early spring 2012, I (well, my realotor) did find a very reasonably priced, well kept, good neighborhood, etc etc home that I really, really REALLY liked. Made the appointment and went to look at it , and bless the seller, right there on the kitchen table was a copy of the HOA rules as they stood for 2012. I didn't even read them, didn't waste any more of the realtor's time, just an "I'm sorry I'm no longer interested". No HOA.


/purchased an adorable 2 bed/2 bath ranch for the cats
//I thought it was mine, but it's theirs really.
2013-01-14 03:44:41 PM
1 votes:

jamesmusik: They put up a phone call with the guy. It's pure genius.

http://www.courierpress.com/videos/detail/a-conversation-with-stonec re ek-hoa-president-steph/


Holy crap, I would have ripped into that idiot HOA guy after about 60 seconds of that crap. Or at least laughed at the idiot.
2013-01-14 03:42:47 PM
1 votes:
Someone named Hess with delusions of grandeur and a penchant for the tyrannical? Colour me shocked.
2013-01-14 03:41:18 PM
1 votes:
Hey, whats going on in.....hold on a sec

*runs outside, pees off the porch*

Sorry, had to run to the bathroom

/conserving water
//country livin'
2013-01-14 03:39:22 PM
1 votes:

nekom: ajgeek: And people BUY INTO IT!

That's the real puzzling part.  I don't get what the upshot is.  I suppose if you REALLY loved conformity and wanted to live in a neighborhood where the houses all look the same.  Can't really see why it would appeal to anyone.  I've got a pickup truck without plates in my yard just for driving around on my property, I've got two septic tanks still in the ground, I cut my grass when the mood strikes me.  I wouldn't last a week in an HOA environment.


Farkers that defend hoas typically tell you that if you don't have an hoa, all your neighbors will let the grass get ten feet tall, leave rusting cars and dead dogs on their front lawn, and paint their house plaid with a middle finger pointed at your bedroom window.
2013-01-14 03:31:37 PM
1 votes:
My HOA has taken me to court three times to get me to take down my "prohibited" DirecTV dish.  FCC law specifically prohibits homeowner's associations from banning DSS dishes.  HOA: "FCC laws do not apply to us."  Court: "Uhm, yes they do."

Well, long story short, I've won all three times, but can't get the court to award me legal fees. So, every couple of years, I'm out $3k in legal fees to keep my DirecTV dish.

//gotta have NFL Sunday Ticket
///go Steelers
////next year
2013-01-14 03:31:22 PM
1 votes:

Nabb1: Step one: let the petty tyrants sue you.
Step two: seek attorneys fees when you bounce their frivolous suit right out of court.
Step three: record the judgment for attorneys fees and slap a lien on their house.
Step four: LOL.


The website you got your law degree from, do they let you print the diploma from the site or do they email it to you?
2013-01-14 03:30:16 PM
1 votes:
"Furthermore, this notice also requires you not to at any measure mention anything regarding my name, any resident of Stonecreek, NOR will we ALLOW any of your printing in any article regarding Stonecreek at any time in any publication," the message stated. "You will be held liable for any violations of this letter and notice/request in this email. If we find/discover you have mentioned Stonecreek in any legal matter their (sic) will be action toward yourself as well as any print paper you represent in the media article.

Bite my ass and choke on it, you deranged control freak.

"You stop this article immediately, because I will sue you just like I sue the people who don't pay their dues," he said.
- HOA President and professional douchbag Stephen Hess, Stonecreek Arbors Homeowners Association.
2013-01-14 03:28:43 PM
1 votes:
the100.ru

♪♫ Stonecreek do what I pleasee
Stonecreek I can't stay
Stonecreek I got to I got to get away ♪♫
2013-01-14 03:25:37 PM
1 votes:

groppet: lil nazi


you live in IL?
Cause I HATE those lil il nazis.
2013-01-14 03:24:14 PM
1 votes:

MisterLoki: "Furthermore, this notice also requires you not to at any measure mention anything regarding my name, any resident of Stonecreek, NOR will we ALLOW any of your printing in any article regarding Stonecreek at any time in any publication,"

lol


He might as well just said "I'm a powerful tool in my own little HOA pond, and I think my perceived authority extends into the real world, so I'm going to issue silly orders to you."

Oh, and, Stonecreek, featuring what I believe to be the dulcet dictatorship of Stephen Heß...excuse me, Hess. Like this is the first time a Hess has issued silly orders.
2013-01-14 03:23:50 PM
1 votes:
FTA:

"You stop this article immediately, because I will sue you just like I sue the people who don't pay their dues," he said.

'A powerful tool'

assets.diylol.com
2013-01-14 03:23:00 PM
1 votes:
I just got done with a fight with my HOA. I get a letter from them telling me that my back gate (which I never use) is broken and to fix it. Now week prior to that the HOA had a big siding project where all the roofs and siding were replaced. Well the crew they hired left a mess in my yard and broke the fence which caused the hinges to bend and the door to fall off. I didnt really give 2 shiats about the door since the wood is mostly rotten anyways and I just propped it up since I never use it. There were lots of phone calls and letters exchanged. I did get an apology from them about the mess left in my yard (woopty doo), but I still had to rehang the door since I had no proof the contractors did it. I filled the screw holes with an epoxy and damn if it is holding better than before. Gotta find the lil nazi that keeps crying about this shiat.
2013-01-14 03:20:49 PM
1 votes:
i0.kym-cdn.com

Stonecreek, H.O.A.
Stonecreek, H.O.A.
Stonecreek, H.O.A.
Stonecreek, H.O.A.
Stonecreek, H.O.A.
Stonecreek, H.O.A.
Stonecreek, H.O.A.
Stonecreek, H.O.A.
Stonecreek, H.O.A.
Stonecreek, H.O.A.
Stonecreek, H.O.A.
Stonecreek, H.O.A.

2013-01-14 03:20:02 PM
1 votes:

Elzar: I've lived in an HOA, it was an outrage! My property value didn't go down, my neighbors weren't allowed to park their broke down cars on the front lawn and I wasn't even able to call the cops on my neighbors for them not blasting music into the wee hours of the morning.


I know I mean who wants to get to know their neighbors? To discuss with them like rational adults about neighborhood concerns like broken down cars and loud music. No better to sign away your rights and have other people enforce codes so you can continue to be the farking coward you are.
2013-01-14 03:18:46 PM
1 votes:
FTA: Homes are selling in Stonecreek for generally no more than $155,000, while it is not uncommon for homes at Keystone to sell for $200,000 or more.

Yeah, I'd consider paying a 30% surplus to live in a relaxed 'hood, too.
2013-01-14 03:17:43 PM
1 votes:
www.adnkronos.com
2013-01-14 03:11:49 PM
1 votes:
To do what I please.
To ride the breeze.
I can't stay,
Gotta gotta gotta get away
2013-01-14 03:07:09 PM
1 votes:
Stonecreek, H.O.A. Stonecreek, Hoa Stonecreek HOA
Stonecreek, H.O.A. Stonecreek, Hoa Stonecreek HOA
Stonecreek, H.O.A. Stonecreek, Hoa Stonecreek HOA
Stonecreek, H.O.A. Stonecreek, Hoa Stonecreek HOA
Stonecreek, H.O.A. Stonecreek, Hoa Stonecreek HOA
Stonecreek, H.O.A. Stonecreek, Hoa Stonecreek HOA
Stonecreek, H.O.A. Stonecreek, Hoa Stonecreek HOA
2013-01-14 02:41:21 PM
1 votes:
Looks like he graduated from the "You can make anything stick in court simply by declaring it to be so in writing!" school of law. He's perfect for an HOA president.
2013-01-14 02:39:24 PM
1 votes:
"You stop this article immediately, because I will sue you just like I sue the people who don't pay their dues," he said.

'A powerful tool'

Heh heh. Got the tool part right.
2013-01-14 02:33:06 PM
1 votes:
"You stop this article immediately, because I will sue you just like I sue the people who don't pay their dues," he said.

'A powerful tool'


Well, I don't know about powerful, but yes, pretty obviously a tool.
2013-01-14 02:00:27 PM
1 votes:
I've lived in an HOA, it was an outrage! My property value didn't go down, my neighbors weren't allowed to park their broke down cars on the front lawn and I wasn't even able to call the cops on my neighbors for them not blasting music into the wee hours of the morning.
2013-01-14 01:47:34 PM
1 votes:
I swear to god HOAs are lawyers collective attempt to become ruler of their own little country. And people BUY INTO IT!

/you could pay me to live in an HOA
//it would have to be a lot of money, but you could pay me.
 
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