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(Las Vegas Review Journal)   PSA: If you lose your cellphone, don't go to this guy's house. HE DOESN'T HAVE IT   (lvrj.com) divider line 33
    More: Strange, dobson, PSA, North Las Vegas, David Pogue  
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19951 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Jan 2013 at 5:13 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2013-01-13 05:25:20 PM  
7 votes:
That dude should ask the local Mormons to hang out near his place.

"Why, no, this fine man doesn't have your phone, but have you taken a moment to consider your eternal soul?"
2013-01-13 05:24:48 PM  
7 votes:
So you could say that he's the triangulation man, triangulation man, does whatever triangulation can.
2013-01-13 05:54:11 PM  
5 votes:
FTA: "They might as well have said, 'Give me my horse back.'"

Seriously, though, the girl hadn't finished that year in college. She needed that horse.
2013-01-13 05:23:38 PM  
4 votes:

serial_crusher: CSB: I had a situation when I first moved to Austin.  Looked up a bar on Google Maps, but the address only came up as "Austin, TX".  So, iPhone gave me directions to the geographical center of Austin, which was like 10 miles from where the actual bar was.


That wasn't a cool story. That was worse than a story about a bridge.
2013-01-13 09:51:56 PM  
3 votes:

Jument: Or maybe he's a cellphone kleptomaniac and he has every single one of them!


I picture him opening the secret trapdoor in his floor, performing a swan dive into the massive hidden basement filled with stolen phones and swimming around in them like Scrooge McDuck.
2013-01-13 07:39:42 PM  
3 votes:
Frankenstorm:

I know a Wayne Dobson. I just sent him this link. Thanks, submitter.

So now they'll look each other up on Facebook and fall madly in love. "We have the same name!"

I used to know a Patrick Somebody who only got involved with women named Patricia. Over & over. for YEARS. You'd go "Hey Pat!" and they'd both answer: you had to call them "Patrick" and "Patty" or "Boy" and "Girl" or whatever.

All things being equal I'd rather date a guy named Jonathan (like in the Bible, y'know?) or a woman named Amy which also means "Beloved." And my personal history contains several women named Michelle and several whose middle name is Lynn (but no Michelle Lynns). And there is a locally famous photographer with the same first and last names and the same middle initial.

None of which has anything to do with anything in this thread of course, it's just that I'm still sober enough to type with one finger.
2013-01-13 07:15:36 PM  
3 votes:
i.imgur.com

These are not the phones you're seeking.
2013-01-13 05:38:06 PM  
3 votes:
so at this point the dude could steal all the phones and he wanted and the police would just ignore it.

1. have sprint use your house as stolen phone starting point
2. start stealing phones
3. profit
2013-01-14 05:57:17 AM  
2 votes:

mmonnens: So, if you call 911 from a cell phone, know where the Fark you are when you make the call.


Yeah, only have emergencies in places where you are familiar with the address!

Geez, people. Go get mugged in your part of town.

Anyway, this guy should start collecting old cell phones - I mean get a shiatload of them and fill up a couple of big trashcans with them. When these people knock on his door, point them in the direction of the trashcans and let them sort through a few thousand dead phones which aren't theirs trying to find their own.
2013-01-13 09:09:31 PM  
2 votes:
img808.imageshack.us
2013-01-13 08:48:32 PM  
2 votes:

Satanic_Hamster: Smgth: /srrsly tho, some crazy person shows up at my house at zero dark thirty ranting and raving, There Will Be Blood
//I will drink their milkshake!

Dunno about blood, but I guarantee you that I wouldn't answer the door at 2 am without a gun.

Arthur Jumbles: Six words: Motion activated water sprinkler with timer. Set it up outside the front door to activate between the hours from 11pm to 6am. Anybody who comes by between those hours will get drenched.

This is a good one.


If it is not a felony to own a sprinkler in Clark County... it should be.
2013-01-13 07:57:46 PM  
2 votes:
I'd answer the door with my Bushmaster AR15 Newtown model.
2013-01-13 06:59:27 PM  
2 votes:
Had a fun problem like that. A little solder splash in the Gardena Central Office caused every long distant call to a Marine Electronics store to ring my home phone.

It only took two years to find and fix it.

And I worked for Pacific Telephone at the time too.
2013-01-13 06:41:26 PM  
2 votes:
Or maybe he's a cellphone kleptomaniac and he has every single one of them!
2013-01-13 06:06:40 PM  
2 votes:
Six words: Motion activated water sprinkler with timer. Set it up outside the front door to activate between the hours from 11pm to 6am. Anybody who comes by between those hours will get drenched.
2013-01-13 05:54:08 PM  
2 votes:
I know a Wayne Dobson. I just sent him this link. Thanks, submitter.
2013-01-13 05:42:51 PM  
2 votes:

Spasticus Autisticus: Wonder how he might profit from this?


put small mail slot in door-> add sign that says deposit $20 or I will not answer the door. (or whatever amount)
2013-01-13 05:38:38 PM  
2 votes:

Spasticus Autisticus: Wonder how he might profit from this?


Start stealing cell phones?
2013-01-13 11:00:26 PM  
1 votes:

sandbar67: I had a phone number for a long time that was this close to a chinese food place in the ghetto. Finally, I just started taking orders.

Link


I used to have a phone number that was one digit different from a drive-in movie theatre in Detroit. We would get probably thirty calls a night on weekends. We started answering the phone "East Side Drive In" and when they asked what movie was playing we'd make up movie names, and when they'd ask the cost of admission we'd tell them we have a special and it was one dollar per car no matter how many people were in the car. I figured a lot of pissed off people showed up at that place.
2013-01-13 08:36:57 PM  
1 votes:
I had a phone number for a long time that was this close to a chinese food place in the ghetto. Finally, I just started taking orders.

Link
2013-01-13 08:05:35 PM  
1 votes:
i47.photobucket.com

i wonder if his neighbors have seen this story
2013-01-13 08:04:24 PM  
1 votes:
I have Sprint and anytime I am at home connected to my wireless router my location shows I am at the Luxor in Las Vegas even though I am hundreds of miles away. It gives me a reason to check in using Google Plus.
2013-01-13 06:52:28 PM  
1 votes:

Spasticus Autisticus: Wonder how he might profit from this?



Open a used cellphone boutique in his house?
2013-01-13 06:03:58 PM  
1 votes:
My cat is a Luddite so I guess I'm in the clear.
2013-01-13 06:03:58 PM  
1 votes:
Never EVAR stay in room 1212 when in NYC or greater NY area. Too many dumb mofos forgetting to dial '9' first.
2013-01-13 05:49:28 PM  
1 votes:

EngineerAU: Anal Tobacco Furnace: Are you trying to troll?

This does happen. I used to work for one of the biggest retailers in the country during a huge expansion phase. One of my jobs was to correct the placement of stores on our website. We were using MapQuest as out backend and if it couldn't find the address in its database, it would place the store in the population weighted center of the zip code... or if the zip code wasn't in the database, the population center of the city. Because most of our new stores were on the suburban fringe, quite often the streets didn't even exist in MapQuest's database. One time it placed a store on an airport runway. Another time in a lake. Most of the time it just showed up on the wrong street several miles away.

/The stores in Quebec were the worst because I couldn't call anyone at the store to ask where they were located
//Workers at other stores got a laugh out of someone from headquarters calling to ask for help in placing their store on the map


Are you trying to troll?
2013-01-13 05:44:29 PM  
1 votes:

Anal Tobacco Furnace: Are you trying to troll?


This does happen. I used to work for one of the biggest retailers in the country during a huge expansion phase. One of my jobs was to correct the placement of stores on our website. We were using MapQuest as out backend and if it couldn't find the address in its database, it would place the store in the population weighted center of the zip code... or if the zip code wasn't in the database, the population center of the city. Because most of our new stores were on the suburban fringe, quite often the streets didn't even exist in MapQuest's database. One time it placed a store on an airport runway. Another time in a lake. Most of the time it just showed up on the wrong street several miles away.

/The stores in Quebec were the worst because I couldn't call anyone at the store to ask where they were located
//Workers at other stores got a laugh out of someone from headquarters calling to ask for help in placing their store on the map
2013-01-13 05:35:45 PM  
1 votes:
What the cell?
2013-01-13 05:34:37 PM  
1 votes:
Sounds like somebody is using Apple Maps.
2013-01-13 05:32:11 PM  
1 votes:

jaflasvegas: I_Hate_Iowa: Sue Sprint for every time someone shows up at his house after midnight or any time the cops show up. Every one of those could be argued as some sort of emotional distress bullshiat. I wouldn't care if I won as long as Sprint got the message each time it happened. If Sprint fixes the problem then the lawsuit problem also goes away.

I saw this on the news this morning. The problem here is that the city of north las vegas put the address of the tower at his house. It is a block away. Now they have to change the map which isnt easy with red tape. Sprint had nothing to do with it.


or it could been even stupider than I originally thought. GIGO strikes again
2013-01-13 05:29:23 PM  
1 votes:
Isn't there some lawyer who can shove this problem up the communication company's ass so hard it leaks 100's of thousands of dollars into the hands of that poor gentleman?
2013-01-13 05:22:41 PM  
1 votes:
A lot of so-called "GPS enabled" phones don't actually have GPS antennas in them. They use a less accurate tracking system that either triangulates between cell phone towers or uses the information provided by a WiFi router (if the phone was connecting to the Internet through WiFi). I'm betting the cell phone thieves live very close to this guy's house.
2013-01-13 05:22:33 PM  
1 votes:
CSB: I had a situation when I first moved to Austin.  Looked up a bar on Google Maps, but the address only came up as "Austin, TX".  So, iPhone gave me directions to the geographical center of Austin, which was like 10 miles from where the actual bar was.
 
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