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(GoComics)   How cyclists see their fellow humans   ( gocomics.com) divider line
    More: Amusing, swines  
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30075 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Jan 2013 at 2:04 PM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



468 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-01-13 12:16:47 PM  
This all went by in such a blur.
 
2013-01-13 01:22:50 PM  

Nothing To See Here: This all went by in such a blur.


It didn't even hand-signal or slow down, either.
 
2013-01-13 01:29:06 PM  
Yeah. That's about right.

Self identified cyclists are the lowest form of life on the road. Basically they're below possums and deed. At least there's 70lbs of good eatin' on a deer. You hit a cyclist, the best you can hope for is the police charging them for causing the accident. Too stringy for the cookpot.
 
2013-01-13 01:35:19 PM  
Jef had boobs. Is 'Jef' short for 'Jefercina,' or 'Jefelle'?
 
2013-01-13 01:36:23 PM  
Is that supposed to have been funny?
 
wee
2013-01-13 01:41:04 PM  

serial_crusher: Is that supposed to have been funny?


I think he was going for accurate more than funny.
 
2013-01-13 01:48:32 PM  

xanadian: Jef had boobs. Is 'Jef' short for 'Jefercina,' or 'Jefelle'?


I think it's a joke at Jef Mallett's  expense.
 
2013-01-13 02:09:41 PM  
If a bike weighs 3000 pounds and has 300 horsepower at its disposal, they might have a point. I have this thing called a brain. It allows me to understand my surroundings and plan my movements. I can stop on a dime. My bike weighs 13 pounds. At worst, someone will have a contusion.
/Proud red light runner since like forever
//Cyclists who smoke and wear headphones and text while cycling are the problem. (I've seen that)
///And don't get me started on Rascals and scooters on the bike path
 
2013-01-13 02:09:51 PM  
I always pack heat when I cycle, so that if a driver swerves and crushes my legs, I can shoot him in the dick afterwards.
 
2013-01-13 02:12:09 PM  
There's a difference between a two-ton steel vehicle powered by distilled petroleum and a twenty pound vehicle powered by oatmeal and sausage. Most of the present traffic laws were written when the top speed of both vehicles were around eighteen miles per hour. But keep complaining, I know it's terribly difficult to accelerate an automobile, you have to depress your right foot by about a centimeter, you might get a blister or something.
 
2013-01-13 02:12:56 PM  
Tip for bicyclists, if you are really hardcore, you buy the heaviest/crappiest bike available and wear normal clothes if you want to get the best workout.
 
2013-01-13 02:13:15 PM  

Quantum Apostrophe: If a bike weighs 3000 pounds and has 300 horsepower at its disposal, they might have a point. I have this thing called a brain. It allows me to understand my surroundings and plan my movements. I can stop on a dime. My bike weighs 13 pounds. At worst, someone will have a contusion.
/Proud red light runner since like forever
//Cyclists who smoke and wear headphones and text while cycling are the problem. (I've seen that)
///And don't get me started on Rascals and scooters on the bike path


Holy crap, we're in complete agreement.

I'm gonna go 3D print a beer in celebration.
 
2013-01-13 02:14:09 PM  

Quantum Apostrophe: /Proud red light runner since like forever


I'm looking forward to rinsing you out of my grill one day.
 
2013-01-13 02:14:52 PM  
theorellior: See what fun we can have together? Betcha if we met in real life we'd be best bum buddies like ever, in the whole universe.
 
2013-01-13 02:15:34 PM  

Quantum Apostrophe: If a bike weighs 3000 pounds and has 300 horsepower at its disposal, they might have a point. I have this thing called a brain. It allows me to understand my surroundings and plan my movements. I can stop on a dime. My bike weighs 13 pounds. At worst, someone will have a contusion.
/Proud red light runner since like forever
//Cyclists who smoke and wear headphones and text while cycling are the problem. (I've seen that)
///And don't get me started on Rascals and scooters on the bike path


Keep running those red lights and forever is gonna take a turn for the worse. And my sympathy will be with the poor soul who ends up smacking you because they will bear the burden of running into your stupidity.
 
2013-01-13 02:16:04 PM  

doyner: I'm looking forward to rinsing you out of my grill one day.


If a cyclist runs a red light and no motorist's right-of-way is infringed, does a driver still get butthurt?
 
2013-01-13 02:16:21 PM  

xanadian: Jef had boobs. Is 'Jef' short for 'Jefercina,' or 'Jefelle'?


Guest artist Rob Liefeld.
 
2013-01-13 02:16:38 PM  
As a daily bicycle commuter and model of good road cycling behavior (yes, I stop and sit there at red lights), nothing annoys me more than Jef-esque douches. Guess what, self-important cyclists of the Entitlement Generation: You're not helping the law-abiding, courteous, and Spandex-free road sharers. Just stay home if you can't behave.
 
2013-01-13 02:16:38 PM  
I just love when I heard from the cyclist in question who was followed by a cop for a bit in a downtown environment. When he was finally pulled over he was given three tickets for running three red lights. $124 per light.
 
2013-01-13 02:16:40 PM  

Quantum Apostrophe: theorellior: See what fun we can have together? Betcha if we met in real life we'd be best bum buddies like ever, in the whole universe.


Until our atoms wear down, at least.
 
2013-01-13 02:17:33 PM  
before the internet, cartoons had to be funny or else they didn't get published
 
2013-01-13 02:18:06 PM  

Quantum Apostrophe: At worst, someone will have a contusion.


Sutchi Hui begs to differ
I get it, it takes you a while to get up to speed and you don't want to have to stop at every red light, but seriously, if you use the road, the rules apply to you.
 
2013-01-13 02:18:40 PM  
I'm a cyclist and most of the motorists I come across drive reasonably. There are some idiots that cut you off or park in bike lanes or run red lights, but these people are in the minority. And I've seen plenty of cyclists do stupid things too. There is enough of that to go around for everyone.

On the other hand Pedos (Pedestrians) with their constant jaywalking slow things down for everyone as they stroll everywhere with their pedestrians-have-the-right-of-way bullshiat attitude.
 
2013-01-13 02:18:51 PM  

Hughlander: I just love when I heard from the cyclist in question who was followed by a cop for a bit in a downtown environment. When he was finally pulled over he was given three tickets for running three red lights. $124 per light.


I'm glad he did that, that cyclist could have bruised one or more pedestrians and maybe skinned a knee with such dangerous and reckless behavior. Plus the cop got his quota for the day! Win-win.
 
2013-01-13 02:18:51 PM  
This is why I dont feel bad for using cyclists for speed bumps. But they do a number on my tires.
 
2013-01-13 02:19:22 PM  

theorellior: doyner: I'm looking forward to rinsing you out of my grill one day.

If a cyclist runs a red light and no motorist's right-of-way is infringed, does a driver still get butthurt?


Not at all.  It's the motorist with a green light that has right-of-way and still has cross traffic because of pedal-powered assholes that gets "butthurt" as you call it.
 
2013-01-13 02:19:30 PM  
That's funny; as a downhill racer that's how I see road cyclists. Little effete bike riders with tiny bicycles and prissy pants.

/Buy they weally weally twy so hard and it's just so cuuuute.
 
2013-01-13 02:19:49 PM  

How bicyclists treat pedestrians:


1.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size


If I had the money I would pay off every state politician in Massachusetts to pass a law requiring all bicyclists to ride in the road only. I'm tired of the riders who act like they own the sidewalk.

 
2013-01-13 02:20:32 PM  
CSB: A little while ago I made a right hand turn out of a driveway on my bike. I didn't really look for oncoming traffic though and I ended up pulling out in front of a car. It was a campus road full of turns and speedbumps so it wasn't exactly a dangerous situation. At a shop sign down the road he rolled down his window and made a bit of a snarky comment. I said to him "I'm really sorry, I didn't see you there" and I said it with sincerity because I realized as I was pulling out in front of him that I was being a dick. I think my politeness caused his head to explode.

I run lights and stop signs but I do my very best to do it only when it's absolutely safe and non-dickish. If you get mad at cyclists blasting through reds and stops, watch any intersection for 5 minutes and count the drivers who make rolling stops and rolling turns on red.
 
2013-01-13 02:20:44 PM  

Quantum Apostrophe: If a bike weighs 3000 pounds and has 300 horsepower at its disposal, they might have a point. I have this thing called a brain. It allows me to understand my surroundings and plan my movements. I can stop on a dime. My bike weighs 13 pounds. At worst, someone will have a contusion.
/Proud red light runner since like forever
//Cyclists who smoke and wear headphones and text while cycling are the problem. (I've seen that)
///And don't get me started on Rascals and scooters on the bike path


So a driver has no right to expect you to behave as a vehicle? So they stop at the 4-way stop, expecting you to stop next. They go (all legal), you blow in front of them, they have to jam on the brakes. You think that's fine?

Traffic rules are there so that people know what to expect on the road. Random violations are so common by bikes that I assume they'll do the dumbest possible thing at any given moment, with no regard for their own safety. I don't care if the cyclist is 100% at fault and there's video evidence of it: I don't want to kill one. So stop being douchebags and follow the damned rules.
 
2013-01-13 02:20:45 PM  
In before... Ah crap. Nevermind.
 
2013-01-13 02:20:55 PM  
MrHelpful: That wasn't very helpful. People who obey the law can get killed as easily. I look where the hell I am going. Red wavelength photons emanating from a municipal structure are just a guideline for me. Far worse are the cyclists with headphones on, they are ignoring audio cues the entire time they are riding, I'm just running red lights once or twice.

That being said, I am in fairly good shape and have a decent bike. I also shift down when I brake so I can get back to speed easily. So I'm quite agile. When I go camping on my bike and have extra weight on my backpack and can't see as well, I slow down and obey traffic lights more, especially when I'm out of town.

Running red lights is a culture thing here in Montreal. Our drivers can barely master "right on green" so if I stopped at a red light that would be MORE dangerous as no one would expect it!
 
2013-01-13 02:21:15 PM  

doyner: Not at all. It's the motorist with a green light that has right-of-way and still has cross traffic because of pedal-powered assholes that gets "butthurt" as you call it.


It was a riff on the "tree falling in the forest with no one around making noise" bit. If I run a red light with no oncoming traffic, will you get butthurt just to keep the universe in balance?
 
2013-01-13 02:21:40 PM  
I remember a great cyclist moment.

Where I used to live, the road outside my house was a popular one for those huge long "trains" of 30 cyclists who ignore all traffic laws and in general act like total douchebags. I lived on the intersection of that road and a small road that went to a community behind my block. I've often almost been struck as a pedestrian by these asses. Well, one day, there was a big ol F-350000 huge honkin pick'up truck at the intersection, the light turned green, and he started into the intersection. Just as one of these douche-trains was in the process of ignoring their red light.

That "THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP sound that they made each smacking into the side of the pickup truck made my day. It was probably the most satisfying sound I've ever heard in my life.

/ #2 was afterwards, the shreeking and biatching and moaning from the lawbreaking cyclists picking up their twisted wrecked bikes, who were FURIOUS at the truck driver who dared to enter the intersection on a green light.
 
2013-01-13 02:22:10 PM  

theorellior: doyner: I'm looking forward to rinsing you out of my grill one day.

If a cyclist runs a red light and no motorist's right-of-way is infringed, does a driver still get butthurt?


What if a red light running cyclist mows down and kills a pedestrian?
 
2013-01-13 02:22:28 PM  
Did you hear about the blonde that wanted to trade her Menstruated Cylcle in for a Schwinn?
 
2013-01-13 02:22:28 PM  

Quantum Apostrophe: If a bike weighs 3000 pounds and has 300 horsepower at its disposal, they might have a point. I have this thing called a brain. It allows me to understand my surroundings and plan my movements. I can stop on a dime. My bike weighs 13 pounds. At worst, someone will have a contusion.


Only a contusion? Are you sure?
Link
Link
Link
 
2013-01-13 02:22:28 PM  
There's a reason we don't follow all the rules of the road; no one in a position of authority ever tells us not to. I've blown through red lights with a cop sitting right there watching. They never do anything, ever. You can call us arrogant if you want but if you knew cops wouldn't ticket you for running a red light I'm pretty sure you would do the same thing.

I think of it like this; considering all the crap cyclists have to deal with on a daily basis - getting cut off, cursed at, splashed with water, run into (happened to me a few weeks ago), etc. we deserve to run a few red lights. Don't like it? Too bad, get your own bike and join us.
 
2013-01-13 02:22:48 PM  

Fuggin Bizzy: I always pack heat when I cycle, so that if a driver swerves and crushes my legs, I can shoot him in the dick afterwards.


This.
 
2013-01-13 02:22:53 PM  

JohnAnnArbor: So a driver has no right to expect you to behave as a vehicle? So they stop at the 4-way stop, expecting you to stop next. They go (all legal), you blow in front of them, they have to jam on the brakes. You think that's fine?


No, I always respect the right-of-way of a vehicle if one is present. It wigs drivers out when I wave them through a stop sign, but there you go.
 
2013-01-13 02:23:03 PM  

skinink: How bicyclists treat pedestrians:
[1.bp.blogspot.com image 472x848]
If I had the money I would pay off every state politician in Massachusetts to pass a law requiring all bicyclists to ride in the road only. I'm tired of the riders who act like they own the sidewalk.


I don't want that. Just drive/ride according to conditions. That means slow down amongst pedestrians. Not a difficult concept.
 
2013-01-13 02:23:09 PM  
Quantum Apostrophe is also a bike douche; this explains much about his threadshiatting in space threads.
 
2013-01-13 02:23:42 PM  
Just returned form Europe. You see tons of bicycles - people ride them! To work. To the store. Few drive cars. They build roads with small bike lanes. Drivers respect them. Riders respect traffic laws.

Obviously not as evolved as us Amerikans.
 
2013-01-13 02:24:01 PM  

Soymilk: What if a red light running cyclist mows down and kills a pedestrian?


Then the cyclist goes to jail. Wow, that was easy, give me another.
 
2013-01-13 02:24:22 PM  
My cyclist husband pointed this comic out to me because I am constantly complaining about arrogant cyclists. Not only running red lights & stop signs but, my biggest complaint, riding 3,4 or 5 abreast when cars have to share the road.
 
2013-01-13 02:25:16 PM  

JasonOfOrillia: I'm a cyclist and most of the motorists I come across drive reasonably. There are some idiots that cut you off or park in bike lanes or run red lights, but these people are in the minority. And I've seen plenty of cyclists do stupid things too. There is enough of that to go around for everyone.

On the other hand Pedos (Pedestrians) with their constant jaywalking slow things down for everyone as they stroll everywhere with their pedestrians-have-the-right-of-way bullshiat attitude.


In defense of pedestrians, most cars are assholes at marked crosswalks that aren't enforced with a redlight. And I'm more surprised when cars at redlights HAVEN'T stopped with their car completely through the crosswalk. Also. At lights where a turn lane has to share with the crosswalk, drivers act like its the worst thing ever if you keep them from turning immediately because you're tyring to cross the frigging road when the light says you can.
 
2013-01-13 02:25:57 PM  

theorellior: JohnAnnArbor: So a driver has no right to expect you to behave as a vehicle? So they stop at the 4-way stop, expecting you to stop next. They go (all legal), you blow in front of them, they have to jam on the brakes. You think that's fine?

No, I always respect the right-of-way of a vehicle if one is present. It wigs drivers out when I wave them through a stop sign, but there you go.


Because if it's your turn, just GO. That goes for bikes or cars.
 
2013-01-13 02:26:09 PM  

theorellior: doyner: I'm looking forward to rinsing you out of my grill one day.

If a cyclist runs a red light and no motorist's right-of-way is infringed, does a driver still get butthurt?


Not necessarily, but the pedestrian trying to cross (legally, on their signal) gets pretty pissed off. You can stop on a dime. Try doing it sometime.
 
2013-01-13 02:26:14 PM  
Did you hear about the ginger that wanted to trade her Menstruated Cylcle in for a Pashley?

/English version
 
2013-01-13 02:26:17 PM  

theorellior: doyner: Not at all. It's the motorist with a green light that has right-of-way and still has cross traffic because of pedal-powered assholes that gets "butthurt" as you call it.

It was a riff on the "tree falling in the forest with no one around making noise" bit. If I run a red light with no oncoming traffic, will you get butthurt just to keep the universe in balance?


I'm in my house right now.  I don't give two farks what's going on outside on local roadways.  My "butthurt" is based on my first-person traffic experience.

Get over yourself.
 
2013-01-13 02:26:21 PM  
D-Bag cyclist about to zip past my car.

Open car door innocently.

*P-THUMP!*

Bask in the glory.

Then, get cyclist's name in order to have car door repaired by his insurance. Sue him if he doesn't have one. Further bask in greater glory.
 
2013-01-13 02:26:31 PM  

Quantum Apostrophe: If a bike weighs 3000 pounds and has 300 horsepower at its disposal, they might have a point. I have this thing called a brain. It allows me to understand my surroundings and plan my movements. I can stop on a dime. My bike weighs 13 pounds. At worst, someone will have a contusion.
/Proud red light runner since like forever
//Cyclists who smoke and wear headphones and text while cycling are the problem. (I've seen that)
///And don't get me started on Rascals and scooters on the bike path


Yeah, but no one else can predict what crazy-ass thing you're going to do. That's why we have these things called "traffic laws," and you're supposed to follow them.

//very tired of the "never been in an accident . . . but caused dozens" variety of self-absorption
 
2013-01-13 02:26:37 PM  

Quantum Apostrophe: MrHelpful: That wasn't very helpful. People who obey the law can get killed as easily. I look where the hell I am going. Red wavelength photons emanating from a municipal structure are just a guideline for me. Far worse are the cyclists with headphones on, they are ignoring audio cues the entire time they are riding, I'm just running red lights once or twice.

That being said, I am in fairly good shape and have a decent bike. I also shift down when I brake so I can get back to speed easily. So I'm quite agile. When I go camping on my bike and have extra weight on my backpack and can't see as well, I slow down and obey traffic lights more, especially when I'm out of town.

Running red lights is a culture thing here in Montreal. Our drivers can barely master "right on green" so if I stopped at a red light that would be MORE dangerous as no one would expect it!


Nice try but your bragging about blowing red lights is what makes my comment helpful. Everything else you said is just a rationalization for your dangerous and stupid behavior.
 
2013-01-13 02:27:06 PM  

Quantum Apostrophe: If a bike weighs 3000 pounds and has 300 horsepower at its disposal, they might have a point. I have this thing called a brain. It allows me to understand my surroundings and plan my movements. I can stop on a dime. My bike weighs 13 pounds. At worst, someone will have a contusion.
/Proud red light runner since like forever


Do you remember the discussion here about the blog post by Chris Bucchere (pronounced, I hope, "butcher") in which he wrote

The light turned yellow as I was approaching the intersection, but I was already way too committed to stop. The light turned red as I was cruising through the middle of the intersection and then, almost instantly, the southern crosswalk on Market and Castro filled up with people coming from both directions...I couldn't see a line through the crowd and I couldn't stop, so I laid it down and just plowed through the crowded crosswalk in the least-populated place I could find.
I remember seeing a RIVER of blood on the asphalt, but it wasn't mine. I really hope he ends up OK.


If so, you may recall that "he" didn't end up OK. "He", a 71 year old man called Sutchi Hui, died in hospital.

Except insofar as no man is an island, I'm not greatly disturbed by cyclists or car drivers who kill themselves doing stupid things. I'm much more bothered when they affect other people; either those they hit and injure or kill or those whom they involve in the accident. When you end up under the wheels of a car at one of those red light, mangled, broken and quite possibly dead, the car driver is going to feel terrible, even though it will be entirely your fault.
 
2013-01-13 02:28:50 PM  

theorellior: doyner: I'm looking forward to rinsing you out of my grill one day.

If a cyclist runs a red light and no motorist's right-of-way is infringed, does a driver still get butthurt?


Perhaps not, until the cyclist slams into the driver's car and then decides to sue.
 
2013-01-13 02:29:07 PM  

JasonOfOrillia: I'm a cyclist and most of the motorists I come across drive reasonably. There are some idiots that cut you off or park in bike lanes or run red lights, but these people are in the minority. And I've seen plenty of cyclists do stupid things too. There is enough of that to go around for everyone.

On the other hand Pedos (Pedestrians) with their constant jaywalking slow things down for everyone as they stroll everywhere with their pedestrians-have-the-right-of-way bullshiat attitude.


Hey fark you too buddy.

/pedestrian
//doesn't jaywalk

///seriously, equating people who jaywalk with people who are sexual predators of children? I'd invite you to stay classy but I'd have to believe you had any in the first place
 
2013-01-13 02:29:09 PM  
JohnAnnArbor : If there are no cars anywhere, why should I stop? If there are cars, I obey the lights. Simple, no?

HTApprovedChick: FTA: "a bicyclist who was trying to break a personal speed record". And that applies to every cyclist? I don't have twin GE afterburning turbofans on my bike, OK? And even if I were trying to break a speed record.... I'd still be looking ahead. This nutjob sounds like he was looking at his feet or something.
 
2013-01-13 02:29:27 PM  

skinink: If I had the money I would pay off every state politician in Massachusetts to pass a law requiring all bicyclists to ride in the road only. I'm tired of the riders who act like they own the sidewalk.


That's already the law in San Francisco. Doesn't help.
 
2013-01-13 02:31:21 PM  

Quantum Apostrophe: If a bike weighs 3000 pounds and has 300 horsepower at its disposal, they might have a point. I have this thing called a brain. It allows me to understand my surroundings and plan my movements. I can stop on a dime. My bike weighs 13 pounds. At worst, someone will have a contusion.
/Proud red light runner since like forever
//Cyclists who smoke and wear headphones and text while cycling are the problem. (I've seen that)
///And don't get me started on Rascals and scooters on the bike path


As someone who bikes to work regularly, let me assure you that you ARE the problem and you ARE breaking the law. I hope you get pulled over and fined.

I stop for red lights and stop signs.
 
2013-01-13 02:31:38 PM  

Any Pie Left: Quantum Apostrophe is also a bike douche; this explains much about his threadshiatting in space threads.


i'm also getting the "precious and unique snowflake" vibe.
 
2013-01-13 02:31:59 PM  

TV's Vinnie: [msnbcmedia.msn.com image 850x527]
Stare at it and enjoy, Farkers. Stare at it and enjoy.


Thanks, I was just about to post this one as well. One of my favorite cyclists vs cars images.
 
2013-01-13 02:32:00 PM  

stiletto_the_wise: I remember a great cyclist moment.

Where I used to live, the road outside my house was a popular one for those huge long "trains" of 30 cyclists who ignore all traffic laws and in general act like total douchebags. I lived on the intersection of that road and a small road that went to a community behind my block. I've often almost been struck as a pedestrian by these asses. Well, one day, there was a big ol F-350000 huge honkin pick'up truck at the intersection, the light turned green, and he started into the intersection. Just as one of these douche-trains was in the process of ignoring their red light.

That "THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP sound that they made each smacking into the side of the pickup truck made my day. It was probably the most satisfying sound I've ever heard in my life.

/ #2 was afterwards, the shreeking and biatching and moaning from the lawbreaking cyclists picking up their twisted wrecked bikes, who were FURIOUS at the truck driver who dared to enter the intersection on a green light.


How long did it take you to stop laughing at them? It would've taken me a few minutes.
 
2013-01-13 02:32:06 PM  

JohnAnnArbor: Because if it's your turn, just GO. That goes for bikes or cars.


No, I was referring to the concept that cars expect a bike to blow through the stop sign, so when I come to a stop and let them take their rightful turn, it blows their mind.
 
2013-01-13 02:32:50 PM  

Fuggin Bizzy: I always pack heat when I cycle, so that if a driver swerves and crushes my legs, I can shoot him in the dick afterwards.


I'll make sure after I've hit you the first time, I'll put it in reverse and take out your arms too.
 
2013-01-13 02:33:23 PM  
imageshack.usView Full Size


I am a cyclist and long time motorist, this is how I see my fellow humans. Actually I don't see many of them out here because they're too goddamn fat and lazy to do anything like top out on something with your bike. I have no illusion of superiority about it, I am just one less thing in your way and I'm not bothering anyone.
 
2013-01-13 02:34:33 PM  

TV's Vinnie: D-Bag cyclist about to zip past my car.

Open car door innocently.

*P-THUMP!*

Bask in the glory.

Then, get cyclist's name in order to have car door repaired by his insurance. Sue him if he doesn't have one. Further bask in greater glory.


That happened to a friend of mine who was riding in the bike lane. She needs surgery now and the cop found the dude liable, so his insurance will be covering it.

If you're intentionally a dick, the law probably won't be on your side.
 
2013-01-13 02:34:49 PM  

Raoul Eaton: Perhaps not, until the cyclist slams into the driver's car and then decides to sue.


That's the cyclist being an asshole. As QA said, I have eyes and ears and no steel shell protecting me. It's in my best interests to keep from doing something that will kill me. That includes crossing busy freeways, riding out into incoming traffic, slamming into pedestrians, or colliding with cars. No of those things will make my day if they happen. So I try my best to avoid them. But I won't sit at an empty intersection waiting for a red light to change, especially if the sensor isn't calibrated to pick up my frame.
 
2013-01-13 02:34:58 PM  

Tumunga: Fuggin Bizzy: I always pack heat when I cycle, so that if a driver swerves and crushes my legs, I can shoot him in the dick afterwards.

I'll make sure after I've hit you the first time, I'll put it in reverse and take out your arms too.


I would first check to see if one of the legs is severed, and then beat the person to death with the severed leg.
 
2013-01-13 02:35:01 PM  
Q. Why wasn't this joke funny?
A. It was two tired...
 
2013-01-13 02:35:28 PM  
PrivateCaboose: Please describe for who I am a problem when there is no one around?

Any Pie Left : Please describe your mental process to arrive at that conclusion. I'm sure Elon Musk will build private space bike paths on Mars when he starts sending 80000 people a month there.
 
2013-01-13 02:36:55 PM  

Quantum Apostrophe: PrivateCaboose: Please describe for who I am a problem when there is no one around?

Any Pie Left : Please describe your mental process to arrive at that conclusion. I'm sure Elon Musk will build private space bike paths on Mars when he starts sending 80000 people a month there.


As long as your state has motorcycle laws allowing you to cross when there is no one there, you're fine. If you're running reds during rush hour because the traffic is a ways off, you're a douchebag like most of the cyclists I see in DC.
 
2013-01-13 02:37:12 PM  

Quantum Apostrophe: PrivateCaboose: Please describe for who I am a problem when there is no one around?


Because we all have to follow traffic laws regardless to prevent collisions when there is someone else there we don't see.
 
2013-01-13 02:37:15 PM  

HTApprovedChick: Quantum Apostrophe: At worst, someone will have a contusion.

Sutchi Hui begs to differ
I get it, it takes you a while to get up to speed and you don't want to have to stop at every red light, but seriously, if you use the road, the rules apply to you.


You not only beat me to the reply, you put it perfectly.
 
2013-01-13 02:37:24 PM  

doyner: Get over yourself.


LOL. That's rich.
 
2013-01-13 02:37:50 PM  

PrivateCaboose: Quantum Apostrophe: PrivateCaboose: Please describe for who I am a problem when there is no one around?

Any Pie Left : Please describe your mental process to arrive at that conclusion. I'm sure Elon Musk will build private space bike paths on Mars when he starts sending 80000 people a month there.

As long as your state has motorcycle laws allowing you to cross when there is no one there, you're fine. If you're running reds during rush hour because the traffic is a ways off, you're a douchebag like most of the cyclists I see in DC.


Ah...  You're in DC too.  I feel your pain.
 
2013-01-13 02:38:47 PM  
Closest I've ever come to an accident was when a cyclist was going the wrong way down a one way street inches from where the street I was on met the street he was on. I stopped, looked to make sure that there was no traffic and started to pull out (remember one way street). I pulled out about three inches when a cyclists sped by the front of my car going well above the speed limit. Prick then had the audacity to give me a dirty look.

/Want to use the public road? Than obey the same damn traffic laws as everyone else, dammit.
 
2013-01-13 02:39:44 PM  

doyner: PrivateCaboose: Quantum Apostrophe: PrivateCaboose: Please describe for who I am a problem when there is no one around?

Any Pie Left : Please describe your mental process to arrive at that conclusion. I'm sure Elon Musk will build private space bike paths on Mars when he starts sending 80000 people a month there.

As long as your state has motorcycle laws allowing you to cross when there is no one there, you're fine. If you're running reds during rush hour because the traffic is a ways off, you're a douchebag like most of the cyclists I see in DC.

Ah...  You're in DC too.  I feel your pain.


I rarely drive here, because I don't own a car. But I'm often the only cyclist I see obeying the rules of the road. Also I hate the term cyclist. I just bike into work and back. 12 miles a day hardly feels like I should have a whole new term describing me.
 
2013-01-13 02:40:25 PM  

theorellior: doyner: Get over yourself.

LOL. That's rich.


Dude, I generally like you.  My whole point is that it is inherently dickish and dangerous to carve out your own set of traffic laws for your convenience.
 
2013-01-13 02:40:40 PM  
I'm learning so much from these exchanges, and to think all this time I thought all cyclists were smug a holes.
 
2013-01-13 02:40:50 PM  
I just feel bad for someone that accidentally kills a cyclist because they blew a red light or stop sign.
 
2013-01-13 02:41:08 PM  

PrivateCaboose: doyner: PrivateCaboose: Quantum Apostrophe: PrivateCaboose: Please describe for who I am a problem when there is no one around?

Any Pie Left : Please describe your mental process to arrive at that conclusion. I'm sure Elon Musk will build private space bike paths on Mars when he starts sending 80000 people a month there.

As long as your state has motorcycle laws allowing you to cross when there is no one there, you're fine. If you're running reds during rush hour because the traffic is a ways off, you're a douchebag like most of the cyclists I see in DC.

Ah...  You're in DC too.  I feel your pain.

I rarely drive here, because I don't own a car. But I'm often the only cyclist I see obeying the rules of the road. Also I hate the term cyclist. I just bike into work and back. 12 miles a day hardly feels like I should have a whole new term describing me.


I will say on 15th St I ride on the sidewalk. During rush hour, the route to 395 is filled with scary drivers.
 
2013-01-13 02:41:24 PM  

PrivateCaboose: I rarely drive here, because I don't own a car. But I'm often the only cyclist I see obeying the rules of the road. Also I hate the term cyclist. I just bike into work and back. 12 miles a day hardly feels like I should have a whole new term describing me.


This is why I will never hit you in traffic.
 
2013-01-13 02:41:28 PM  

letrole: before the internet, cartoons had to be funny or else they didn't get published


Ziggy
 
2013-01-13 02:44:24 PM  

Quantum Apostrophe: MrHelpful: That wasn't very helpful. People who obey the law can get killed as easily. I look where the hell I am going. Red wavelength photons emanating from a municipal structure are just a guideline for me. Far worse are the cyclists with headphones on, they are ignoring audio cues the entire time they are riding, I'm just running red lights once or twice.

That being said, I am in fairly good shape and have a decent bike. I also shift down when I brake so I can get back to speed easily. So I'm quite agile. When I go camping on my bike and have extra weight on my backpack and can't see as well, I slow down and obey traffic lights more, especially when I'm out of town.

Running red lights is a culture thing here in Montreal. Our drivers can barely master "right on green" so if I stopped at a red light that would be MORE dangerous as no one would expect it!


Dear cyclist,

RAMMING SPEED!

Sincerly,

Owns truck with cow catcher on the front

/ I keed; but, you've got to admit; it's not the best idea to run red lights. That's how you become a big stain on someone's windshield
 
2013-01-13 02:44:24 PM  
Why must we have to share the road with the uninsured, untaxed, and unlicensed vehicles?
 
2013-01-13 02:44:52 PM  
I'm going to bike in each and every one of your hometowns to run red lights this summer.
/Not really...
 
2013-01-13 02:45:35 PM  

special20: Why must we have to share the road with the uninsured, untaxed, and unlicensed vehicles?


For one thing, it reduces traffic congestion.
 
2013-01-13 02:45:48 PM  

The My Little Pony Killer: Hey fark you too buddy.

/pedestrian
//doesn't jaywalk

///seriously, equating people who jaywalk with people who are sexual predators of children? I'd invite you to stay classy but I'd have to believe you had any in the first place


The fact that you don't jaywalk is cool. That is the responsible thing to do. And "Pedo" is merely short for pedestrian. As for those sexual predators of children, I'm not sure someone who seems to advertise themselves and a fan of a children's show should be raising that issue at all.
 
2013-01-13 02:46:01 PM  
Not all cyclists are of the dickish sort who disobey traffic laws, and those that are make the rest of us look bad. It's a problem. Still, the dickish drivers that try to run me off the road, throw things at me, or think it's clever to honk just as they are going past are not helping. That's also a problem.

Or in other words, a lot of people are dickish. It's a problem.
 
2013-01-13 02:46:03 PM  

Sticky Hands: letrole: before the internet, cartoons had to be funny or else they didn't get published

Ziggy


Family Circle
 
2013-01-13 02:46:07 PM  
When I was in college we used to throw water bottles at cyclists who rode way to the left and wouldn't move over.
 
2013-01-13 02:46:31 PM  

TV's Vinnie: D-Bag cyclist about to zip past my car.

Open car door innocently.

*P-THUMP!*

Bask in the glory.

Then, get cyclist's name in order to have car door repaired by his insurance. Sue him if he doesn't have one. Further bask in greater glory.


I think you're usually expected to check for oncoming traffic before opening your door and stepping into a traffic lane.  So would probably be you paying for his funeral, not the other way around.
 
2013-01-13 02:46:36 PM  
Before this thread I had no opinion about bicyclists.

After this thread, I think they are douchebags and I hate them.

Mission accomplished?
 
2013-01-13 02:46:38 PM  

Mi-go amigo: Not all cyclists are of the dickish sort who disobey traffic laws, and those that are make the rest of us look bad. It's a problem. Still, the dickish drivers that try to run me off the road, throw things at me, or think it's clever to honk just as they are going past are not helping. That's also a problem.

Or in other words, a lot of people are dickish. It's a problem.


Fist bump.
 
2013-01-13 02:46:59 PM  

mesmer242: Sticky Hands: letrole: before the internet, cartoons had to be funny or else they didn't get published

Ziggy

Family Circle


Sorry, mistyped that. Family Circus. I'm sure Family Circle isn't funny either though.
 
2013-01-13 02:47:24 PM  

GORDON: Before this thread I had no opinion about bicyclists.

After this thread, I think they are douchebags and I hate them.

Mission accomplished?


I'm more of a douchenozzle than a douchebag...
 
2013-01-13 02:47:50 PM  
You cyclist haters sound fat. Maybe if you got off your rascals and got some cardio, you wouldn't be so bitter and out of shape.

/Cyclist
//I make my own rules
 
2013-01-13 02:48:18 PM  

special20: Why must we have to share the road with the uninsured, untaxed, and unlicensed vehicles?


Because we pay sales taxes too and don't damage the roadbed?
 
2013-01-13 02:49:26 PM  

theorellior: special20: Why must we have to share the road with the uninsured, untaxed, and unlicensed vehicles?

Because we pay sales taxes too and don't damage the roadbed?


In his defense, the car title my friend has to buy and emissions testing for her old car is about $900.
 
2013-01-13 02:49:28 PM  

doyner: Dude, I generally like you. My whole point is that it is inherently dickish and dangerous to carve out your own set of traffic laws for your convenience.


Well, we'll just have to agree to disagree.
 
2013-01-13 02:49:58 PM  

theorellior: Raoul Eaton: Perhaps not, until the cyclist slams into the driver's car and then decides to sue.

That's the cyclist being an asshole. As QA said, I have eyes and ears and no steel shell protecting me. It's in my best interests to keep from doing something that will kill me. That includes crossing busy freeways, riding out into incoming traffic, slamming into pedestrians, or colliding with cars. No of those things will make my day if they happen. So I try my best to avoid them. But I won't sit at an empty intersection waiting for a red light to change, especially if the sensor isn't calibrated to pick up my frame.


So. Cars should wait at that same intersection, but cyclists don't have to because they don't feel like it?

In a lot of states it is legal to run a red light if, for some reason, it won't change after you have stopped and waited a period of time at it.
 
2013-01-13 02:50:46 PM  

TV's Vinnie: D-Bag cyclist about to zip past my car.

Open car door innocently.

*P-THUMP!*

Bask in the glory.

Then, get cyclist's name in order to have car door repaired by his insurance. Sue him if he doesn't have one. Further bask in greater glory.


You realize that cyclists hugging the side of the street is due to cars whizzing by them of the left dangerously close. Excessive door prizing will only encourage cyclists to ride in the center of the lane which will slow everyone down.
 
2013-01-13 02:51:00 PM  
Beware of the Spoken Ones.
 
2013-01-13 02:51:49 PM  

Soymilk: theorellior: doyner: I'm looking forward to rinsing you out of my grill one day.

If a cyclist runs a red light and no motorist's right-of-way is infringed, does a driver still get butthurt?

What if a red light running cyclist mows down and kills a pedestrian?


We're about to find out here in San Francisco: Link.
 
2013-01-13 02:51:58 PM  

JasonOfOrillia: On the other hand Pedos (Pedestrians) with their constant jaywalking slow things down for everyone as they stroll everywhere with their pedestrians-have-the-right-of-way bullshiat attitude.


Dunno what the rules are there, but over here pedestrians do have the right of way.
 
2013-01-13 02:52:44 PM  

mesmer242: mesmer242: Sticky Hands: letrole: before the internet, cartoons had to be funny or else they didn't get published

Ziggy

Family Circle

Sorry, mistyped that. Family Circus. I'm sure Family Circle isn't funny either though.


It was frequently framed in a circle.
 
2013-01-13 02:53:06 PM  

Hamanu: That's funny; as a downhill racer that's how I see road cyclists. Little effete bike riders with tiny bicycles and prissy pants.

/Buy they weally weally twy so hard and it's just so cuuuute.


I don't have a tiny bicycle or prissy pants but you would impress me more if you raced up hills too.
 
2013-01-13 02:53:19 PM  
Meh. Dickhead bikers can lobby for changes tp the law until their spandex splits at the seams, but they can't change the laws of physics.

/rides a bike sometimes
//stays the fark out of everyone's way and obeys traffic laws
///doesn't own any spandex
 
2013-01-13 02:54:45 PM  

orbister: JasonOfOrillia: On the other hand Pedos (Pedestrians) with their constant jaywalking slow things down for everyone as they stroll everywhere with their pedestrians-have-the-right-of-way bullshiat attitude.

Dunno what the rules are there, but over here pedestrians do have the right of way.


Not outside of a crosswalk. Crossing a street outside a crosswalk in many places means if you're mowed down by a car, a cop will ticket you to prove the driver was not at fault.
 
2013-01-13 02:56:07 PM  

orbister: JasonOfOrillia: On the other hand Pedos (Pedestrians) with their constant jaywalking slow things down for everyone as they stroll everywhere with their pedestrians-have-the-right-of-way bullshiat attitude.

Dunno what the rules are there, but over here pedestrians do have the right of way.


Where I am all road users have an obligation to not hit pedestrians if they can help it. Folks take this to mean that pedestrians have the right of way however they could be charged with jaywalking if they don't cross a street at an intersection and with the lights if there are any. I cycle with an eye to the parked cars and pedestrians because a walker or a car door can pop in front of you at any moment.
 
2013-01-13 02:56:18 PM  

Dr Jack Badofsky: So. Cars should wait at that same intersection, but cyclists don't have to because they don't feel like it?


Okay, boys and girls, for all you pious drivers out there who sanctimoniously follow every gorram traffic law out there, I'm gonna laugh the next time there's a red light camera thread or a speeding thread and some of your are all puffing your chests out about how you ride the ass of every milquetoast driver who doesn't know the left lane is for Manly Drivers going 90.
 
2013-01-13 02:56:42 PM  

JasonOfOrillia: Hamanu: That's funny; as a downhill racer that's how I see road cyclists. Little effete bike riders with tiny bicycles and prissy pants.

/Buy they weally weally twy so hard and it's just so cuuuute.

I don't have a tiny bicycle or prissy pants but you would impress me more if you raced up hills too.


? I just have a bike I bought at Costco. It gets me to and from work, to the grocery store, etc.

I play rugby, I don't need to prove I'm bad ass with a bicycle.
 
2013-01-13 02:57:20 PM  

Watubi: Tip for bicyclists, if you are really hardcore, you buy the heaviest/crappiest bike available and wear normal clothes if you want to get the best workout.


...I barely even ride anymore, but buy the  crappiest bike? o.O Why would you do that? The fun is in being able to turn\stop\do tricks on a dime!
 
2013-01-13 02:58:14 PM  

Amishrabbit: As a daily bicycle commuter and model of good road cycling behavior (yes, I stop and sit there at red lights), nothing annoys me more than Jef-esque douches. Guess what, self-important cyclists of the Entitlement Generation: You're not helping the law-abiding, courteous, and Spandex-free road sharers. Just stay home if you can't behave.


This.

As a person who does all of my incity chores by bike, I am so sick of the pompous arrogance of the Lycra brigade as they blow through every law on the road. You want to know why people are so wary of bikes? Because they have no idea what you are going to do next and then they will have their insurance go up because of your dumbass.

/fark Critical Mass
 
2013-01-13 02:58:49 PM  
How drivers think cyclists see their fellow humans

I'm pretty sure that pyramid would work if the word drivers was on top, too.
And be a more accurate reflection of what's actually going on.
 
2013-01-13 02:59:19 PM  

kpaxoid: mesmer242: mesmer242: Sticky Hands: letrole: before the internet, cartoons had to be funny or else they didn't get published

Ziggy

Family Circle

Sorry, mistyped that. Family Circus. I'm sure Family Circle isn't funny either though.

It was frequently framed in a circle.


Apparently, my mistype was more correct than I thought, as it was The Family Circle before it was The Family Circus. Family Circle the magazine threatened a lawsuit and they changed the name.

/thanks wikipedia
 
2013-01-13 03:01:29 PM  

Fuggin Bizzy: I always pack heat when I cycle, so that if a driver swerves and crushes my legs, I can shoot him in the dick afterwards.


I always keep a gun in the car so if I hit a cyclist and only crush its legs, I can put the thing out of its misery.
 
2013-01-13 03:01:47 PM  
In other words, I will run a red or a stop sign for my convenience while on a bike, and I will travel faster than the posted speed limit for my convenience while in my car. DO any of you do any different?
 
2013-01-13 03:01:53 PM  
On a semi pleasant walk across the Golden Gate Bridge,
I noticed that instead of the annoying little bells to announce that a pedestrian has entered the scared grounds of the rider,
they just yell, " LOOK OUT ASSHOLE "

/keep it classy cyclists
//livestrong
///quit doing dope
 
2013-01-13 03:02:08 PM  

Too_many_Brians: Amishrabbit: As a daily bicycle commuter and model of good road cycling behavior (yes, I stop and sit there at red lights), nothing annoys me more than Jef-esque douches. Guess what, self-important cyclists of the Entitlement Generation: You're not helping the law-abiding, courteous, and Spandex-free road sharers. Just stay home if you can't behave.

This.

As a person who does all of my incity chores by bike, I am so sick of the pompous arrogance of the Lycra brigade as they blow through every law on the road. You want to know why people are so wary of bikes? Because they have no idea what you are going to do next and then they will have their insurance go up because of your dumbass.

/fark Critical Mass


Yep. This.
 
2013-01-13 03:02:16 PM  
I ride to work, and I can say that most motorist are decent human beings. The worst ones are the ones that don't seem to acknowledge your/pedestrians existence. IE: Blocking the cross walk when I have the legal right of way, and once some jerk nearly ran me over. He was going to run a red light, cross walk gave me the right of way and I expected him to stop but he kept on going and then yelled at me afterwards. As for running red lights, etc. I follow above all the rule of looking both ways before I cross the street. If nobody is coming in the direction of the cross walk that I hope to cross, I'm going to cross whether the light is red or not.

I also wave motorist through if they have the right of way, though its sometimes awkward when they wave me through and we both sit there for a moment wanting the other to go. I also sometimes ride on sidewalks, and guess what. I slow down as I approach people, announce myself, and when possible ride around them off the sidewalk.
 
2013-01-13 03:03:04 PM  

Hughlander: I just love when I heard from the cyclist in question who was followed by a cop for a bit in a downtown environment. When he was finally pulled over he was given three tickets for running three red lights. $124 per light.


If he was followed by the cop, then the cop must have run the lights too. I'd rather get hit by a cyclist than a (cop) car.

/of course, I'd rather not get hit at all
 
2013-01-13 03:03:17 PM  
Any problems would be solved if we all drove in Chinese cars and rode German bikes...

i.imgur.comView Full Size
 
2013-01-13 03:03:44 PM  

theorellior: In other words, I will run a red or a stop sign for my convenience while on a bike, and I will travel faster than the posted speed limit for my convenience while in my car. DO any of you do any different?


I don't run reds on my bike. I also rarely speed in a car. Since I drive infrequently, I am very wary of the high speeds.
 
2013-01-13 03:03:59 PM  

PrivateCaboose: JasonOfOrillia: Hamanu: That's funny; as a downhill racer that's how I see road cyclists. Little effete bike riders with tiny bicycles and prissy pants.

/Buy they weally weally twy so hard and it's just so cuuuute.

I don't have a tiny bicycle or prissy pants but you would impress me more if you raced up hills too.

? I just have a bike I bought at Costco. It gets me to and from work, to the grocery store, etc.

I play rugby, I don't need to prove I'm bad ass with a bicycle.


The rugby must explain your inability to read the comment train. He was talking about the downhill racer, not everyone else. Sheesh.

/feel dirty for defending a lycra rider.
 
2013-01-13 03:03:59 PM  

theorellior: Dr Jack Badofsky: So. Cars should wait at that same intersection, but cyclists don't have to because they don't feel like it?

Okay, boys and girls, for all you pious drivers out there who sanctimoniously follow every gorram traffic law out there, I'm gonna laugh the next time there's a red light camera thread or a speeding thread and some of your are all puffing your chests out about how you ride the ass of every milquetoast driver who doesn't know the left lane is for Manly Drivers going 90.


Okay, if you hit me while I'm driving and you kill me with your bike and I so happen to be breaking the law, no hard feelings. If, for some reason, I hit you and kill you while you're breaking the law, oh well. I'm pretty sure law enforcement will see it that way too.
 
2013-01-13 03:05:04 PM  

mesmer242: kpaxoid: mesmer242: mesmer242: Sticky Hands: letrole: before the internet, cartoons had to be funny or else they didn't get published

Ziggy

Family Circle

Sorry, mistyped that. Family Circus. I'm sure Family Circle isn't funny either though.

It was frequently framed in a circle.

Apparently, my mistype was more correct than I thought, as it was The Family Circle before it was The Family Circus. Family Circle the magazine threatened a lawsuit and they changed the name.

/thanks wikipedia


Family Circus is supposed to be a bit bland, but once in awhile they surprise on how much they actually pay attention to geeky details:

24.media.tumblr.comView Full Size


/unedited
/resume the rage
 
2013-01-13 03:05:49 PM  

Too_many_Brians: PrivateCaboose: JasonOfOrillia: Hamanu: That's funny; as a downhill racer that's how I see road cyclists. Little effete bike riders with tiny bicycles and prissy pants.

/Buy they weally weally twy so hard and it's just so cuuuute.

I don't have a tiny bicycle or prissy pants but you would impress me more if you raced up hills too.

? I just have a bike I bought at Costco. It gets me to and from work, to the grocery store, etc.

I play rugby, I don't need to prove I'm bad ass with a bicycle.

The rugby must explain your inability to read the comment train. He was talking about the downhill racer, not everyone else. Sheesh.

/feel dirty for defending a lycra rider.


It was in response to both. I'm on FarkMobile so I can't really respond to each individually.
 
2013-01-13 03:07:03 PM  
And its why we hate cyclists so much, in the city I have no issue but when I am on rural roads get the fark out of he way assholes.
 
2013-01-13 03:07:57 PM  

Watubi: Tip for bicyclists, if you are really hardcore, you buy the heaviest/crappiest bike available and wear normal clothes if you want to get the best workout.


i.imgur.comView Full Size


Don't forget about adding copious amounts of rolling friction.
 
2013-01-13 03:09:25 PM  

JesusJuice: When I was in college we used to throw water bottles at cyclists who rode way to the left and wouldn't move over.


That obviously makes you superior.
 
2013-01-13 03:10:01 PM  

Dr Jack Badofsky: Okay, if you hit me while I'm driving and you kill me with your bike and I so happen to be breaking the law, no hard feelings.


Remember my comment about 2000 lbs versus 20 lbs? I'm gonna go back to that.

Dr Jack Badofsky: If, for some reason, I hit you and kill you while you're breaking the law, oh well. I'm pretty sure law enforcement will see it that way too.


Motorists can kill cyclists any day of the week, up down and sideways, regardless of whether the cyclist is playing by the rules, so I don't give a rat's ass about laws. I care about riding like I have a target painted on my ass.
 
2013-01-13 03:10:26 PM  
Holy crap, this thread really makes me dislike cyclists.
 
2013-01-13 03:10:55 PM  

Quantum Apostrophe: My bike weighs 13 pounds.


upload.wikimedia.orgView Full Size


/my steel-frame MB weighs 31 pounds
 
2013-01-13 03:13:08 PM  

doyner: Quantum Apostrophe: /Proud red light runner since like forever

I'm looking forward to rinsing you out of my grill one day.


Got hit by a red light running bicyclist 2 years ago. I had the green, the cyclist blew the light and hit my left front fender. The sight of her cartwheeling over my hood and *splatting* down in the middle of the intersection is something I will never forget.

/barely dented the fender
//farked her up
 
2013-01-13 03:15:53 PM  

Skyd1v: doyner: Quantum Apostrophe: /Proud red light runner since like forever

I'm looking forward to rinsing you out of my grill one day.

Got hit by a red light running bicyclist 2 years ago. I had the green, the cyclist blew the light and hit my left front fender. The sight of her cartwheeling over my hood and *splatting* down in the middle of the intersection is something I will never forget.

/barely dented the fender
//farked her up


t2.gstatic.comView Full Size

SAME ROAD SAME RULES MOTHERFARKER, HOW DOES IT WORK?
 
2013-01-13 03:15:56 PM  
static.guim.co.ukView Full Size
 
2013-01-13 03:15:57 PM  

Skyd1v: doyner: Quantum Apostrophe: /Proud red light runner since like forever

I'm looking forward to rinsing you out of my grill one day.

Got hit by a red light running bicyclist 2 years ago. I had the green, the cyclist blew the light and hit my left front fender. The sight of her cartwheeling over my hood and *splatting* down in the middle of the intersection is something I will never forget.

/barely dented the fender
//farked her up


**shudder**
 
2013-01-13 03:17:22 PM  
I must be that rare breed. I stop (or at least slow down and look carefully) at stop lights and signs and generally act as if I were a car driver. Don't go on the sidewalk unless there is one, nobody is there and the road has potholes. Drivers are pretty good in my area about not getting in my way and I try to return the favor.
 
2013-01-13 03:17:42 PM  
Don't Troll Me Bro!:
i.imgur.comView Full Size


aytm.comView Full Size


/rides an old school MB 10-16 miles to work 9 months a year (depending on route)
//pussy during our 'winter'
///slashies for bicycles
 
2013-01-13 03:17:55 PM  
Law abiding cyclist here: No spandex, wears a helmet, three lights on my bike, ride in the bike lane whenever humanly possible and in the street, as per AZ law, when there is no bike lane, and stop at traffic signals/signs.

Sidewalk: Emergency use only, when person who doesn't like bicycles doesn't give me the law-required 3 foot berth and is a threat to my life. Hop on and off as quickly as possible.

Problem with sidewalks and roads: People who aren't on bicycles don't know the law. I've had to hop on the sidewalk before to avoid getting splattered, and had people yell at me to get off the sidewalk. I've ridden in bike lanes and had people actually slow down and tell me to "get the hell on the sidewalk."

No-win, no win. Ach.
 
2013-01-13 03:19:17 PM  

stiletto_the_wise: I remember a great cyclist moment.

Where I used to live, the road outside my house was a popular one for those huge long "trains" of 30 cyclists who ignore all traffic laws and in general act like total douchebags. I lived on the intersection of that road and a small road that went to a community behind my block. I've often almost been struck as a pedestrian by these asses. Well, one day, there was a big ol F-350000 huge honkin pick'up truck at the intersection, the light turned green, and he started into the intersection. Just as one of these douche-trains was in the process of ignoring their red light.

That "THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP sound that they made each smacking into the side of the pickup truck made my day. It was probably the most satisfying sound I've ever heard in my life.

/ #2 was afterwards, the shreeking and biatching and moaning from the lawbreaking cyclists picking up their twisted wrecked bikes, who were FURIOUS at the truck driver who dared to enter the intersection on a green light.


So much win.  I'm sure those cyclists looked and didn't see him in the intersection though.
 
2013-01-13 03:19:40 PM  
What burns me up is when I hit a cyclist, they wipe out, then they expect you to stop and help them.

I mean really, what am i, a Doctor?

Give me a break.
 
2013-01-13 03:20:03 PM  
Hmm, I notice the two photos of the car-on-bike-scrum crash scene disappeared from the thread.

I take it that photo is a no-no on Fark?
 
2013-01-13 03:20:53 PM  
I only have one problem with cyclists... not all of them are offenders but the ones that do this are pure evil.

DO NOT try to pass a car in the right lane on the right while that car is making a legal right hand turn. Drivers expect vehicles to follow the rules of the road, when you deviate from one of the most basic (don't pass a car during a turn on the side it's turning to) you will get clocked and you will have deserved it.
 
2013-01-13 03:21:11 PM  

Stone Meadow: Hmm, I notice the two photos of the car-on-bike-scrum crash scene disappeared from the thread.

I take it that photo is a no-no on Fark?


Very much so.  Time-out material.
 
2013-01-13 03:23:05 PM  

doyner: Stone Meadow: Hmm, I notice the two photos of the car-on-bike-scrum crash scene disappeared from the thread.

I take it that photo is a no-no on Fark?

Very much so.  Time-out material.


Thanks
 
2013-01-13 03:23:27 PM  
A sand bike? for zipping across the dunes?
 
2013-01-13 03:23:49 PM  

Quantum Apostrophe: If a bike weighs 3000 pounds and has 300 horsepower at its disposal, they might have a point. I have this thing called a brain. It allows me to understand my surroundings and plan my movements. I can stop on a dime. My bike weighs 13 pounds. At worst, someone will have a contusion.
/Proud red light runner since like forever
//Cyclists who smoke and wear headphones and text while cycling are the problem. (I've seen that)
///And don't get me started on Rascals and scooters on the bike path


You have to be trolling, or you're that cyclist in San Francisco that hit and killed a pedestrian then lamented about his helmet being broken. Cyclists on 13 pound bikes do kill pedestrians just as dead as cars do.
 
2013-01-13 03:28:10 PM  
 
2013-01-13 03:29:01 PM  

Glendale: Quantum Apostrophe: If a bike weighs 3000 pounds and has 300 horsepower at its disposal, they might have a point. I have this thing called a brain. It allows me to understand my surroundings and plan my movements. I can stop on a dime. My bike weighs 13 pounds. At worst, someone will have a contusion.
/Proud red light runner since like forever
//Cyclists who smoke and wear headphones and text while cycling are the problem. (I've seen that)
///And don't get me started on Rascals and scooters on the bike path

You have to be trolling, or you're that cyclist in San Francisco that hit and killed a pedestrian then lamented about his helmet being broken. Cyclists on 13 pound bikes do kill pedestrians just as dead as cars do.


The bike weighs 13lbs, but the momentum striking the pedestrian includes the 130-170 lb dickhead riding it.  Physics motherfarker, how does it work?
 
2013-01-13 03:29:01 PM  
Just decide if you are a vehicle or a pedestrian and it's all good.
 
2013-01-13 03:29:54 PM  

orbister: JasonOfOrillia: On the other hand Pedos (Pedestrians) with their constant jaywalking slow things down for everyone as they stroll everywhere with their pedestrians-have-the-right-of-way bullshiat attitude.

Dunno what the rules are there, but over here pedestrians do have the right of way.


In my state pedestrians can't just cross anywhere whenever and expect right of way. There's been plenty of pedestrian vs. car resulting in death of the pedestrian last year where the driver was never even cited because the pedestrian failed to yield to traffic (almost always crossing against a light at a controlled intersection or crossing outside of a crosswalk). The driver still has to live the knowledge of killing someone though.
 
2013-01-13 03:30:02 PM  

Nothing To See Here: What burns me up is when I hit a cyclist, they wipe out, then they expect you to stop and help them.

I mean really, what am i, a Doctor?

Give me a break.


Well, were you in the Police Box lane?
 
2013-01-13 03:30:58 PM  
This cartoon is spot on. Great submission.
 
2013-01-13 03:31:42 PM  

doyner: Glendale: Quantum Apostrophe: If a bike weighs 3000 pounds and has 300 horsepower at its disposal, they might have a point. I have this thing called a brain. It allows me to understand my surroundings and plan my movements. I can stop on a dime. My bike weighs 13 pounds. At worst, someone will have a contusion.
/Proud red light runner since like forever
//Cyclists who smoke and wear headphones and text while cycling are the problem. (I've seen that)
///And don't get me started on Rascals and scooters on the bike path

You have to be trolling, or you're that cyclist in San Francisco that hit and killed a pedestrian then lamented about his helmet being broken. Cyclists on 13 pound bikes do kill pedestrians just as dead as cars do.

The bike weighs 13lbs, but the momentum striking the pedestrian includes the 130-170 lb dickhead riding it.  Physics motherfarker, how does it work?


I know that. Tell the OP who claims otherwise.
 
2013-01-13 03:32:42 PM  
sad but true, i'm afraid.
 
2013-01-13 03:32:53 PM  

Glendale: I know that. Tell the OP who claims otherwise.


I was merely amplifying your statement...
 
2013-01-13 03:33:00 PM  

ElBarto79: There's a reason we don't follow all the rules of the road; no one in a position of authority ever tells us not to. I've blown through red lights with a cop sitting right there watching. They never do anything, ever. You can call us arrogant if you want but if you knew cops wouldn't ticket you for running a red light I'm pretty sure you would do the same thing.

I think of it like this; considering all the crap cyclists have to deal with on a daily basis - getting cut off, cursed at, splashed with water, run into (happened to me a few weeks ago), etc. we deserve to run a few red lights. Don't like it? Too bad, get your own bike and join us.


Moron. I don't stop at a red light because I might get a ticket if I don't. I stop at red lights to increase my chances of dying in bed.
 
2013-01-13 03:33:43 PM  

Too_many_Brians: As a person who does all of my incity chores by bike, I am so sick of the pompous arrogance of the Lycra brigade as they blow through every law on the road. You want to know why people are so wary of bikes? Because they have no idea what you are going to do next and then they will have their insurance go up because of your dumbass.


When I cycle, the behaviour of some car drivers leads me to despair. When I drive, the behaviour of some cyclists leads me to despair. Both sides really need to appreciate the others more: drivers need to know how incredibly vulnerable cyclists are and cyclists need to realise how very difficult it can be for cars to see them, particularly at night, and therefore how important it is to be visible and behave predictably.
 
2013-01-13 03:35:21 PM  

orbister: Too_many_Brians: As a person who does all of my incity chores by bike, I am so sick of the pompous arrogance of the Lycra brigade as they blow through every law on the road. You want to know why people are so wary of bikes? Because they have no idea what you are going to do next and then they will have their insurance go up because of your dumbass.

When I cycle, the behaviour of some car drivers leads me to despair. When I drive, the behaviour of some cyclists leads me to despair. Both sides really need to appreciate the others more: drivers need to know how incredibly vulnerable cyclists are and cyclists need to realise how very difficult it can be for cars to see them, particularly at night, and therefore how important it is to be visible and behave predictably.


THIS.

All I friggin' ask as a motorist.
 
2013-01-13 03:37:01 PM  
I like the local cyclists that change from riding on the sidewalk to the street and back multiple times in a single block, and who try to lane-share and go straight while I am in the midst of turning right.

/I'm on a motorbike, I have arms too.
 
2013-01-13 03:37:34 PM  
I read an article recently that pointed out that many countries in Europe have more cars per capita the USA.

Ha! ha!

Here's an older article in the Atlantic with graphs and everything. The USA now ranks 25th in terms of vehicles per capita. Nonetheless, Americans use a lot more petroleum per capita, which is probably the result of lower gasoline prices, lower taxes, and greater distances to travel, among other things.

In places where car use is relatively low, such as New York City, people use one third as much energy as they do in the rest of America. They are not quite as green perhaps as the frugal French and Germans, but compare well with a number of other countries.

Americans stand out in terms of consumption--even compared to Luxembourgeois, who are much richer per capita, being an industrious enclave of highly specialized, educated, multilingual and semi-socialist, ultra-capitalist go-getters with no natural resources to speak of in their tiny country, which is a sort of Super-Turbo-Charged Switzerland. But a lot of young Americans are no longer interested in the burbs, cars, or even real estate. They live for their cellphones, laptops and coffee.

Like me, they figure that most places that are worth visiting can be reached by walking or by flying, with maybe a bus trip or community car involved on occasion when absolutely necessary.

There are some caveats. The definition of a vehicle can be a catch because Americans have a lot of SUVs, pickups and Minivans which may or may not count, but if they do count, Americans are still no longer the Kings of Cars. They've outgrown that phase or can't afford to drive any more.
 
2013-01-13 03:38:13 PM  

doyner: Very much so.  Time-out material.


Why? Was it a fatal accident?
 
2013-01-13 03:38:20 PM  

doyner: The bike weighs 13lbs, but the momentum striking the pedestrian includes the 130-170 lb dickhead riding it.


Still a lot less than 2000 pounds, plus 200-300 pounds for the driver and another 200-300 for each passenger. ('Cuz people who drive everywhere are fat, donchaknow.)

Physics motherfarker, how does it work?

Indeed. 2000 pounds x 60mph > > > 200 pounds x 10mph
 
2013-01-13 03:38:30 PM  
This thread is full of Schwinn.
 
2013-01-13 03:38:37 PM  

BinderWoman: My cyclist husband pointed this comic out to me because I am constantly complaining about arrogant cyclists. Not only running red lights & stop signs but, my biggest complaint, riding 3,4 or 5 abreast when cars have to share the road.


And then they flip you off because you deign to drive around them in the other lane.
 
2013-01-13 03:38:59 PM  
tonyrogers.comView Full Size
 
2013-01-13 03:40:18 PM  

orbister: doyner: Very much so.  Time-out material.

Why? Was it a fatal accident?


Very.  Several killed.

fredklein: doyner: The bike weighs 13lbs, but the momentum striking the pedestrian includes the 130-170 lb dickhead riding it.

Still a lot less than 2000 pounds, plus 200-300 pounds for the driver and another 200-300 for each passenger. ('Cuz people who drive everywhere are fat, donchaknow.)

Physics motherfarker, how does it work?

Indeed. 2000 pounds x 60mph > > > 200 pounds x 10mph


That post was in response to the cyclist-hits-pedestrian-story.

Context motherfarker, how does it work?
t2.gstatic.comView Full Size
 
2013-01-13 03:40:20 PM  

Spanky McStupid: BinderWoman: My cyclist husband pointed this comic out to me because I am constantly complaining about arrogant cyclists. Not only running red lights & stop signs but, my biggest complaint, riding 3,4 or 5 abreast when cars have to share the road.

And then they flip you off because you deign to drive around them in the other lane.


I am tempted to ride my motorbike between bikes riding 2 abreast on 55 mph country roads almost every time I see them.
 
2013-01-13 03:40:40 PM  

orbister: cyclists need to realise how very difficult it can be for cars to see them


If it's difficult for you to see me, even at night, you are either not paying attention or you need to consult an optometrist.  I'm dressed head to toe in reflective clothing and have 4 blinking lights on my bike.

/ "Don't give me the finger, I didn't see you" is one of my favorite quotes from a lady who almost ran me down.  Oh, well, if you weren't paying attention, I guess that makes almost killing me totally ok...
 
2013-01-13 03:41:35 PM  

letrole: before the internet, cartoons had to be funny or else they didn't get published


Not so. A lot of the older comics in the 30s, 40s, and 50s, and probably earlier weren't so much humor as serial stories. Things like The Phantom, soap opera comics, crime detective, and so on. Humor is more common now. Or at least the attempt.
 
2013-01-13 03:41:51 PM  

doyner: Glendale: I know that. Tell the OP who claims otherwise.

I was merely amplifying your statement...


Ah, carry on.
 
2013-01-13 03:41:56 PM  

serial_crusher: orbister: cyclists need to realise how very difficult it can be for cars to see them

If it's difficult for you to see me, even at night, you are either not paying attention or you need to consult an optometrist.  I'm dressed head to toe in reflective clothing and have 4 blinking lights on my bike.

/ "Don't give me the finger, I didn't see you" is one of my favorite quotes from a lady who almost ran me down.  Oh, well, if you weren't paying attention, I guess that makes almost killing me totally ok...


If you die because a car didn't see you, you're still farking dead. Blame the driver if you want, but you're still dead.
 
2013-01-13 03:43:36 PM  

Chilimac: Law abiding cyclist here: No spandex, wears a helmet, three lights on my bike, ride in the bike lane whenever humanly possible and in the street, as per AZ law, when there is no bike lane, and stop at traffic signals/signs.

Sidewalk: Emergency use only, when person who doesn't like bicycles doesn't give me the law-required 3 foot berth and is a threat to my life. Hop on and off as quickly as possible.

Problem with sidewalks and roads: People who aren't on bicycles don't know the law. I've had to hop on the sidewalk before to avoid getting splattered, and had people yell at me to get off the sidewalk. I've ridden in bike lanes and had people actually slow down and tell me to "get the hell on the sidewalk."

No-win, no win. Ach.


Back in '84, I was commuting to work on my road bike one day (a 66 CM Casati, with a real mix of components). One of the streets I had to use was a two lane one way, with a bike lane on the right hand side. When I would turn left on to this street (from a left turn lane, only on the green arrow) I would stay in the left lane until the road was clear, then move over to the right, where the bike lane was. One morning I turned left, then looked back to see a car not very far behind. I continued on, looked back again, it's still there. Looked back again, it's a little closer, but still there. I'm beginning to get frustrated, as I would like to move over to the bike lane, and I'm waiting for this car to pass me so I can do so. The car finally catches up to me, and I look over to see a driver who bore an unfortunate resemblance to Jabba the Hut. "Why aren't you in the bike lane?" she asked as she slowly passed me (I was young and in shape, and this road was slightly down sloping, so without hammering it I was probably going twenty MPH, with her probably going twenty five in a thirty five).
 
2013-01-13 03:43:39 PM  

doyner: orbister: doyner: Very much so.  Time-out material.

Why? Was it a fatal accident?

Very.  Several killed.]


Thanks. I've never been able to work out precisely what the rules are, and the FAQ isn't much help. "Nobody actually dying" they say, but that picture of a Viet Cong chap shooting someone in the head seems fine.
 
2013-01-13 03:43:42 PM  
Did you hear about the Prostitute on a bike?

She used to pedal her ass on the road.
 
2013-01-13 03:44:22 PM  

Glendale: Cyclists on 13 pound bikes do kill pedestrians just as dead as cars do.


The number of pedestrians killed by cars is probably four orders of magnitude greater.
 
2013-01-13 03:45:35 PM  

theorellior: Glendale: Cyclists on 13 pound bikes do kill pedestrians just as dead as cars do.

The number of pedestrians killed by cars is probably four orders of magnitude greater.


And yet no one is defending dickhead drivers....
 
2013-01-13 03:48:25 PM  

serial_crusher: orbister: cyclists need to realise how very difficult it can be for cars to see them

If it's difficult for you to see me, even at night, you are either not paying attention or you need to consult an optometrist.  I'm dressed head to toe in reflective clothing and have 4 blinking lights on my bike.


You'll note that I wrote "how difficult it can be" in a comment about "some cyclists". You sound pretty visible, though I do hope you have at least one fixed light front and back as well. Flashing lights are good for drawing attention to yourself but very bad for actually establishing your position and velocity in a driver's mind. Fluorescent clothing is good in the day time and reflective stuff unbeatable at night.

My pet peeve in this area is (are?) the cyclists who wear one puny little white light at night on their helmets. They either don't care or don't realise that when they stop in the road to turn right (left, in US terms) and look down the road they are entering, they become invisible to oncoming traffic.

Sure, cover yourself and your bike with flashing lights, but have at least one BFO steady white light to the front and one BFO steady red lightto the back.
 
2013-01-13 03:48:55 PM  
knstrct.comView Full Size

Here in Canada, we go everywhere..brah.
 
2013-01-13 03:49:00 PM  

doyner: And yet no one is defending dickhead drivers....


I'm not defending dickhead cyclists. The last think I want to do is hit a pedestrian. It would really fark up my day, since I'm, you know, on a bike and not in a car.

I don't ride like a dick. I ride defensively. Cars can kill me just as look at me sideways. But just as drivers break laws for their own convenience every damn day without any repercussions, I'm gonna do the same on my bike.
 
2013-01-13 03:49:42 PM  
A bicycling thread... I like to think of these as the original gun threads. Lots of internet tough guys bragging how tough they like to injure other human beings.

The only easier troll is saying that you drive 55 in the passing lane.
 
2013-01-13 03:49:54 PM  

doyner: theorellior: Glendale: Cyclists on 13 pound bikes do kill pedestrians just as dead as cars do.

The number of pedestrians killed by cars is probably four orders of magnitude greater.

And yet no one is defending dickhead drivers....


cdn.ebaumsworld.comView Full Size
 
2013-01-13 03:51:02 PM  

doyner: orbister: doyner: Very much so.  Time-out material.

Why? Was it a fatal accident?

Very.  Several killed.


One, actually. Not that that makes it any better.

1 dead as car plows into Mexican bike race (NSFW...or Fark)
 
2013-01-13 03:51:04 PM  

serial_crusher: orbister: cyclists need to realise how very difficult it can be for cars to see them

If it's difficult for you to see me, even at night, you are either not paying attention or you need to consult an optometrist.  I'm dressed head to toe in reflective clothing and have 4 blinking lights on my bike.

/ "Don't give me the finger, I didn't see you" is one of my favorite quotes from a lady who almost ran me down.  Oh, well, if you weren't paying attention, I guess that makes almost killing me totally ok...


Was she old? My wife likes to tell the story of how her grandmother thought she (the grandmother) got better at driving. She said, "I must be getting better, other drivers have stopped flipping me off and cursing at me." To which my wife responded, "No, Granny, you just stopped seeing and hearing them."

Apparently, she routinely ran red lights and stop signs because she didn't notice them. Fortunately, she stopped driving not long after that, but she still technically had her license. Hell, she even passed the state exam to get it renewed. (new York, I think).

/scary, ain't it?
 
2013-01-13 03:51:26 PM  
If you think cyclists are bad.....let me introduce you to MYSELF! I'm a whole different (and worse) breed....

I started off as a 'cyclist' after moving to a new country. Without a car, or a license, or wanting to learn to drive on the other side of the road; I decided to use a bicycle to commute to work. I quickly learned that laws don't apply to cyclists. If a light is red and I can go, I go. Stop signs are optional. If it suits me I jump from the road to the side-walk.

But then I started reading about electric bicycles....

Now, traffic enforcement is a lot more lax here than in the US. I rarely ever see a car pulled over by a cop. But it is non-existent for bicycles. And, electric bicycles (or in my case, a kit added to a traditional bicycle) look just like bicycles. Under the law here, I can have up to a 250W motor and a top assist-speed of ~15mph.

That didn't sound very appealing. So I did some searching online and found an 'off-road' kit. It's completely not street legal but it looks indistinguishable from a legal kit. It's either 350w or 400w, I honestly don't remember - but it's basically a very crappy motorcycle.

Not only do I get to break all sorts of traffic laws, like going through red lights/stop signs and riding on the sidewalk; I can trivially keep pace with Lance Armstrong.
 
2013-01-13 03:51:56 PM  
Did she sue?

/l'm from NJ so that was my first thought.
 
2013-01-13 03:53:18 PM  

doyner: theorellior: Glendale: Cyclists on 13 pound bikes do kill pedestrians just as dead as cars do.

The number of pedestrians killed by cars is probably four orders of magnitude greater.

And yet no one is defending dickhead drivers....


Maybe not implicitly...
 
2013-01-13 03:53:29 PM  

Repo Man: Chilimac: Law abiding cyclist here: No spandex, wears a helmet, three lights on my bike, ride in the bike lane whenever humanly possible and in the street, as per AZ law, when there is no bike lane, and stop at traffic signals/signs.

Sidewalk: Emergency use only, when person who doesn't like bicycles doesn't give me the law-required 3 foot berth and is a threat to my life. Hop on and off as quickly as possible.

Problem with sidewalks and roads: People who aren't on bicycles don't know the law. I've had to hop on the sidewalk before to avoid getting splattered, and had people yell at me to get off the sidewalk. I've ridden in bike lanes and had people actually slow down and tell me to "get the hell on the sidewalk."

No-win, no win. Ach.

Back in '84, I was commuting to work on my road bike one day (a 66 CM Casati, with a real mix of components). One of the streets I had to use was a two lane one way, with a bike lane on the right hand side. When I would turn left on to this street (from a left turn lane, only on the green arrow) I would stay in the left lane until the road was clear, then move over to the right, where the bike lane was. One morning I turned left, then looked back to see a car not very far behind. I continued on, looked back again, it's still there. Looked back again, it's a little closer, but still there. I'm beginning to get frustrated, as I would like to move over to the bike lane, and I'm waiting for this car to pass me so I can do so. The car finally catches up to me, and I look over to see a driver who bore an unfortunate resemblance to Jabba the Hut. "Why aren't you in the bike lane?" she asked as she slowly passed me (I was young and in shape, and this road was slightly down sloping, so without hammering it I was probably going twenty MPH, with her probably going twenty five in a thirty five).


That doesn't compute to me.  Take your left turn straight into the bike lane.
Don't understand why you expected her to pass you on the right.
 
2013-01-13 03:53:29 PM  

Stone Meadow: doyner: orbister: doyner: Very much so.  Time-out material.

Why? Was it a fatal accident?

Very.  Several killed.

One, actually. Not that that makes it any better.

1 dead as car plows into Mexican bike race (NSFW...or Fark)


Ah.  I must be thinking of a different car-plows-through-gaggle-of-cyclists-story.  I do remember that the drivers were nabbed by Mexican police for it.
 
2013-01-13 03:53:43 PM  
I am a cyclist.

I stop at all stop signs.

I stop at all red lights. Under normal circumstances, I cross only when the signal is green. If I am unable to trigger a light change due to the absence of a crosswalk signal and an inability to trigger the pressure sensor, I will -- after verifying an absence of traffic in any direction -- dismount and walk across the intersection as a pedestrian.

I cycle only on roads, avoiding sidewalks. I yield to crossing pedestrians. I keep to the right side of the road and allow ample passing space, unless I am making an imminent left turn.

I use a front-mounted light, a rear light and a helmet light to maintain illumination at night. I also wear reflecting equipment on my legs and on my arms.

I have recently attached an air horn; its purpose is only to use as an audio signal to drivers who endanger my safety through their own violation of traffic laws such as a failure to yield appropriate right of way at a stop sign.

Is anyone able to explain how, exactly, I believe non-cyclists to be "scum" or how I am a "douche"?
 
2013-01-13 03:53:57 PM  
I don't worry about cyclists cutting me off. I have one of these:
images.canadianlisted.comView Full Size
 
2013-01-13 03:54:02 PM  

theorellior: Glendale: Cyclists on 13 pound bikes do kill pedestrians just as dead as cars do.

The number of pedestrians killed by cars is probably four orders of magnitude greater.


That doesn't change the fact that cyclists can kill pedestrians the same way cars can. I don't think cyclists should get a free pass at killing pedestrians just because it wasn't with a car, even if it is infrequent. But that's just like, my opinion, man.
 
2013-01-13 03:54:15 PM  

theorellior: doyner: And yet no one is defending dickhead drivers....

I'm not defending dickhead cyclists. The last think I want to do is hit a pedestrian. It would really fark up my day, since I'm, you know, on a bike and not in a car.

I don't ride like a dick. I ride defensively. Cars can kill me just as look at me sideways. But just as drivers break laws for their own convenience every damn day without any repercussions, I'm gonna do the same on my bike.


I haven't met many drivers who see blowing through red lights or randomly changing behavior from that of a motor vehicle to that of a pedestrian as not only okay, but their god-given right.

Cyclists, on the other hand...
 
2013-01-13 03:54:28 PM  

Mercutio74: I only have one problem with cyclists... not all of them are offenders but the ones that do this are pure evil.

DO NOT try to pass a car in the right lane on the right while that car is making a legal right hand turn. Drivers expect vehicles to follow the rules of the road, when you deviate from one of the most basic (don't pass a car during a turn on the side it's turning to) you will get clocked and you will have deserved it.


Matter of perception. I am riding my bike in the bike lane, which in on the right. A car comes up behind me in their right lane, which is to my left, and overtakes me in order to make a right turn. I smack into the car which has just cut me off.

You would not do this to a car. It would be insane.
 
2013-01-13 03:55:43 PM  

Dimensio: I am a cyclist.

I stop at all stop signs.

I stop at all red lights. Under normal circumstances, I cross only when the signal is green. If I am unable to trigger a light change due to the absence of a crosswalk signal and an inability to trigger the pressure sensor, I will -- after verifying an absence of traffic in any direction -- dismount and walk across the intersection as a pedestrian.

I cycle only on roads, avoiding sidewalks. I yield to crossing pedestrians. I keep to the right side of the road and allow ample passing space, unless I am making an imminent left turn.

I use a front-mounted light, a rear light and a helmet light to maintain illumination at night. I also wear reflecting equipment on my legs and on my arms.

I have recently attached an air horn; its purpose is only to use as an audio signal to drivers who endanger my safety through their own violation of traffic laws such as a failure to yield appropriate right of way at a stop sign.

Is anyone able to explain how, exactly, I believe non-cyclists to be "scum" or how I am a "douche"?


Ask the cartoonist in TFA.  You're fine in my book.
 
2013-01-13 03:55:47 PM  
I have to say the GoPro camera and their like have made cycling a lot more enjoyable. Every few weeks I hear about an asshole driver who was arrested because of video footage of hitting a cyclist and not stopping.
 
2013-01-13 03:56:54 PM  

Dimensio: Is anyone able to explain how, exactly, I believe non-cyclists to be "scum" or how I am a "douche"?


Like many groups, you as an individual get the resulting negative attitude fostered by the dick moves of other asshole cyclists.
 
2013-01-13 03:59:03 PM  

Chilimac: Mercutio74: I only have one problem with cyclists... not all of them are offenders but the ones that do this are pure evil.

DO NOT try to pass a car in the right lane on the right while that car is making a legal right hand turn. Drivers expect vehicles to follow the rules of the road, when you deviate from one of the most basic (don't pass a car during a turn on the side it's turning to) you will get clocked and you will have deserved it.

Matter of perception. I am riding my bike in the bike lane, which in on the right. A car comes up behind me in their right lane, which is to my left, and overtakes me in order to make a right turn. I smack into the car which has just cut me off.

You would not do this to a car. It would be insane.


I have had a cyclist come behind me and attempt this (I was slowed due to a traffic light) four times in the last two years. I have done this to a cyclist never times. Hell, I even wait for cyclists (and pedestrians) in my way to completely cross the street safely before I make a left or right turn from a side street, the way decent people should.
 
2013-01-13 04:02:26 PM  

Chilimac: Mercutio74: I only have one problem with cyclists... not all of them are offenders but the ones that do this are pure evil.

DO NOT try to pass a car in the right lane on the right while that car is making a legal right hand turn. Drivers expect vehicles to follow the rules of the road, when you deviate from one of the most basic (don't pass a car during a turn on the side it's turning to) you will get clocked and you will have deserved it.

Matter of perception. I am riding my bike in the bike lane, which in on the right. A car comes up behind me in their right lane, which is to my left, and overtakes me in order to make a right turn. I smack into the car which has just cut me off.

You would not do this to a car. It would be insane.


Yeah, I would like clarification from Mercutio74 on whether there was a bike lane there or not.  The right hook is one of the most frequent things motorists get wrong.
The proper thing to do is to <b>merge into the bike lane</b> before turning.  <b>Do not turn across the bike lane</b> , especially when it is occupied.
Also, get to be a better judge of other vehicles' speeds.  People usually think they have enough room to pass you, then all of a sudden turn right.  Keep in mind that when your car makes a 90 degree turn, it is effectively stopped, and now I'm heading towards it at 25-30mph.  There needs to be a lot of space for that to work out safely.  Merge behind me and sow down until I clear the intersection.  It will only take you 5 or 10 seconds longer than your life threatening alternative.
 
2013-01-13 04:03:57 PM  

serial_crusher: Chilimac: Mercutio74: I only have one problem with cyclists... not all of them are offenders but the ones that do this are pure evil.

DO NOT try to pass a car in the right lane on the right while that car is making a legal right hand turn. Drivers expect vehicles to follow the rules of the road, when you deviate from one of the most basic (don't pass a car during a turn on the side it's turning to) you will get clocked and you will have deserved it.

Matter of perception. I am riding my bike in the bike lane, which in on the right. A car comes up behind me in their right lane, which is to my left, and overtakes me in order to make a right turn. I smack into the car which has just cut me off.

You would not do this to a car. It would be insane.

Yeah, I would like clarification from Mercutio74 on whether there was a bike lane there or not.  The right hook is one of the most frequent things motorists get wrong.
The proper thing to do is to <b>merge into the bike lane</b> before turning.  <b>Do not turn across the bike lane</b> , especially when it is occupied.
Also, get to be a better judge of other vehicles' speeds.  People usually think they have enough room to pass you, then all of a sudden turn right.  Keep in mind that when your car makes a 90 degree turn, it is effectively stopped, and now I'm heading towards it at 25-30mph.  There needs to be a lot of space for that to work out safely.  Merge behind me and sow down until I clear the intersection.  It will only take you 5 or 10 seconds longer than your life threatening alternative.


I always yield when there is an occupied bike lane.

People try to ride right through me when there isn't a bike lane, I'm in mid-turn, and my turn signal has been on for over 30 seconds. What the fark are they thinking?
 
2013-01-13 04:04:39 PM  

Carth: I have to say the GoPro camera and their like have made cycling a lot more enjoyable. Every few weeks I hear about an asshole driver who was arrested because of video footage of hitting a cyclist and not stopping.


This.  It might be coincidence, but when I added a clearly visible camera to my helmet, car drivers around me seemed to start behaving themselves a lot better.
 
2013-01-13 04:04:58 PM  
How I see cyclist
i26.photobucket.comView Full Size
 
2013-01-13 04:06:13 PM  

serial_crusher: Repo Man: Chilimac: Law abiding cyclist here: No spandex, wears a helmet, three lights on my bike, ride in the bike lane whenever humanly possible and in the street, as per AZ law, when there is no bike lane, and stop at traffic signals/signs.

Sidewalk: Emergency use only, when person who doesn't like bicycles doesn't give me the law-required 3 foot berth and is a threat to my life. Hop on and off as quickly as possible.

Problem with sidewalks and roads: People who aren't on bicycles don't know the law. I've had to hop on the sidewalk before to avoid getting splattered, and had people yell at me to get off the sidewalk. I've ridden in bike lanes and had people actually slow down and tell me to "get the hell on the sidewalk."

No-win, no win. Ach.

Back in '84, I was commuting to work on my road bike one day (a 66 CM Casati, with a real mix of components). One of the streets I had to use was a two lane one way, with a bike lane on the right hand side. When I would turn left on to this street (from a left turn lane, only on the green arrow) I would stay in the left lane until the road was clear, then move over to the right, where the bike lane was. One morning I turned left, then looked back to see a car not very far behind. I continued on, looked back again, it's still there. Looked back again, it's a little closer, but still there. I'm beginning to get frustrated, as I would like to move over to the bike lane, and I'm waiting for this car to pass me so I can do so. The car finally catches up to me, and I look over to see a driver who bore an unfortunate resemblance to Jabba the Hut. "Why aren't you in the bike lane?" she asked as she slowly passed me (I was young and in shape, and this road was slightly down sloping, so without hammering it I was probably going twenty MPH, with her probably going twenty five in a thirty five).

That doesn't compute to me.  Take your left turn straight into the bike lane.
Don't understand why you expected her to pass you on the rig ...


Actually, now that I remember it, I wouldn't always wait for the green arrow; I was turning left onto a one way street, so I could legally turn left on a red. So long as the oncoming traffic was far enough back, that's exactly what I would do. In this case, oncoming traffic was far enough back so that I could turn onto the road, but close enough so that I would wait until they passed before moving over (and remember, it was a two lane road, so I would have to wait until both lanes were clear). This was fine with most people, but she was a bit confused.
 
2013-01-13 04:07:14 PM  

theorellior: special20: Why must we have to share the road with the uninsured, untaxed, and unlicensed vehicles?

Because we pay sales taxes too and don't damage the roadbed?


It costs money to remove the smear you left when you got creamed by a truck when you ran the red light.  A lot more than the sales tax you paid one time for your bike.  So shut the hell up.
 
2013-01-13 04:07:21 PM  

ph0rk: I haven't met many drivers who see blowing through red lights or randomly changing behavior from that of a motor vehicle to that of a pedestrian as not only okay, but their god-given right.


A bicycle is not a motor vehicle. It is a human-powered conveyance. It it not an automobile, and it is not a pedestrian. It is a conceit of the law that a bicycle is considered a motor vehicle, and most of the traffic laws were written when there wasn't much difference between the top speeds of a bicycle or a motorcar. As they're written, they're a joke for the present day. A 20-lb tube-build conveyance with a top speed of 20 mph has much more similarity to a pedestrian than to a 2000 lb enclosed conveyance with a top speed of 120 mph.
 
2013-01-13 04:07:24 PM  
So my office is moving, and between Palo Alto speed limits and the nearest parking being a half mile away, I'm considering buying a bike and biking to work.

Anything I should know, do, etc? Advice on what to look for in a bike?

/Last time I rode a bike, I was 16.
//Also, suburbs where riding in the street was a stupid idiot move (because of 45 MPH speed limits + no bike lanes), and riding on the sidewalk was legal. Not so much here.
 
2013-01-13 04:08:20 PM  

OgreMagi: It costs money to remove the smear you left when you got creamed by a truck when you ran the red light. A lot more than the sales tax you paid one time for your bike. So shut the hell up.


Sounds like that blister on your accelerator foot is acting up again. You might want to get more comfy driving shoes.
 
2013-01-13 04:09:34 PM  

Stone Meadow: Don't Troll Me Bro!: [i.imgur.com image 850x637]

[aytm.com image 556x413]

/rides an old school MB 10-16 miles to work 9 months a year (depending on route)
//pussy during our 'winter'
///slashies for bicycles


Not mine, coworker's. Rode it once. It's like riding on a cloud. I think he said there's 1.5 psi, so the tires ride like pillows, but so much rolling friction. Dude rides that to work every day in the winter. Even when we had that blizzard that dumped 18" a couple weeks back he rode that thing in. His quads look like he stole them from a speedskater.
 
2013-01-13 04:10:11 PM  

theorellior: Dr Jack Badofsky: So. Cars should wait at that same intersection, but cyclists don't have to because they don't feel like it?

Okay, boys and girls, for all you pious drivers out there who sanctimoniously follow every gorram traffic law out there, I'm gonna laugh the next time there's a red light camera thread or a speeding thread and some of your are all puffing your chests out about how you ride the ass of every milquetoast driver who doesn't know the left lane is for Manly Drivers going 90.


You obviously aren't paying attention to the red-light camera threads.  The complaint is they shorten the yellow to a dangerous level all too often when they install the cameras.  If the yellow was a reasonable length, people wouldn't be complaining about the cameras.
 
2013-01-13 04:11:17 PM  

Chilimac: Law abiding cyclist here: No spandex, wears a helmet, three lights on my bike, ride in the bike lane whenever humanly possible and in the street, as per AZ law, when there is no bike lane, and stop at traffic signals/signs.

Sidewalk: Emergency use only, when person who doesn't like bicycles doesn't give me the law-required 3 foot berth and is a threat to my life. Hop on and off as quickly as possible.

Problem with sidewalks and roads: People who aren't on bicycles don't know the law. I've had to hop on the sidewalk before to avoid getting splattered, and had people yell at me to get off the sidewalk. I've ridden in bike lanes and had people actually slow down and tell me to "get the hell on the sidewalk."

No-win, no win. Ach.



Several years ago my husband hit a college girl in Tempe as we were turning right to exit a parking lot. She was riding against traffic, on the sidewalk (no bike lane). Of course, he was looking more to the left for oncoming traffic & she came zooming up on the right. I was in the front passenger seat & didn't see her until the last second. Fortunately, we were going slowly & just hit her front wheel - knocked her off the bike but she only had scrapes. She didn't want us to call an ambulance or the police. She apologized & said she shouldn't have been riding where she was but it really shook us all up.
 
2013-01-13 04:12:18 PM  

Chilimac: Matter of perception. I am riding my bike in the bike lane, which in on the right. A car comes up behind me in their right lane, which is to my left, and overtakes me in order to make a right turn. I smack into the car which has just cut me off.


This nearly happened to me last November. I was riding in the bike lane when a person passed me in the right vehicle lane, slammed on the brakes and made an unsignaled right turn immediately in front of me. I in turn had to slam on the brakes to avoid the over-the-right-rear-fender collision.

When I'm riding 20 mph (my normal speed on that boulevard) I'm covering 30 feet per second. Drivers who think a one car length lead is enough to make a safe right turn in front of you are risking your life.
 
2013-01-13 04:12:29 PM  

serial_crusher: Carth: I have to say the GoPro camera and their like have made cycling a lot more enjoyable. Every few weeks I hear about an asshole driver who was arrested because of video footage of hitting a cyclist and not stopping.

This.  It might be coincidence, but when I added a clearly visible camera to my helmet, car drivers around me seemed to start behaving themselves a lot better.


That sure didn't seem to help this guy.
 
2013-01-13 04:15:08 PM  

Dimensio: I am a cyclist.

I stop at all stop signs.

I stop at all red lights. Under normal circumstances, I cross only when the signal is green. If I am unable to trigger a light change due to the absence of a crosswalk signal and an inability to trigger the pressure sensor, I will -- after verifying an absence of traffic in any direction -- dismount and walk across the intersection as a pedestrian.

I cycle only on roads, avoiding sidewalks. I yield to crossing pedestrians. I keep to the right side of the road and allow ample passing space, unless I am making an imminent left turn.

I use a front-mounted light, a rear light and a helmet light to maintain illumination at night. I also wear reflecting equipment on my legs and on my arms.

I have recently attached an air horn; its purpose is only to use as an audio signal to drivers who endanger my safety through their own violation of traffic laws such as a failure to yield appropriate right of way at a stop sign.

Is anyone able to explain how, exactly, I believe non-cyclists to be "scum" or how I am a "douche"?


If all cyclists acted as you do (and as I did when I rode) then no cyclists would be douches. Of course, we do then still have the issue of motorists who can't be as considerate or responsible.
 
2013-01-13 04:15:08 PM  

OgreMagi: You obviously aren't paying attention to the red-light camera threads. The complaint is they shorten the yellow to a dangerous level all too often when they install the cameras. If the yellow was a reasonable length, people wouldn't be complaining about the cameras.


They're still breaking the law for their own convenience, albeit the convenience of not coming to a shuddering halt halfway in the intersection.

Basically, it's the motes in the eyes of cyclists that cause the beams in driver's eyes to get all irritated, which explains all the butthurt.
 
2013-01-13 04:16:38 PM  
Wow, this thread has made me super happy with my informed decision to be a pedestrian. I can stroll, occasionally even strut. I can listen to an mp3 player while smoking a cigarette or blunt with one hand and eating a cheeseburger with the other. Nobody gives a shiat or even notices me unless I do something stupid and dangerous like cross against the light.

I totally win.
 
2013-01-13 04:17:23 PM  

Don't Troll Me Bro!: Not mine, coworker's. Rode it once. It's like riding on a cloud. I think he said there's 1.5 psi, so the tires ride like pillows, but so much rolling friction. Dude rides that to work every day in the winter. Even when we had that blizzard that dumped 18" a couple weeks back he rode that thing in. His quads look like he stole them from a speedskater.


Yeah, I can believe it. I use 2.5" MB tires with low pressure, but nothing like that. I have to admit I'm a wimp, though, and won't ride in the rain or when it's below about 50 degrees. My BiL rides 10 miles to work every day, though, rain or shine. Of course, we don't get snow, or even hardly ever freezing temps. Still, we get a bit of rain over the winter.
 
2013-01-13 04:18:53 PM  

doyner: Ask the cartoonist in TFA.  You're fine in my book.


The lycra brigades like to distinguish between "cyclists" (people like me) and "people on bikes" (people like them, and possibly like you), just as they like to distinguish between "bicycles" (what I ride) and "bicycle shaped objects" (what they ride, and possibly what you ride.

I used to live next to a bike shop which sold £6,000 (that's $10,000) bicycles. I suspect that the people buying them are the same sort of people who buy $10,000 stereo interconnects. Every hobby has its hierarchy.
 
2013-01-13 04:19:56 PM  
Also, there is no need for me to wear wicked gay lycra or reflectors, I don't have to pay tax or registration fees on my shoes, don't have to carry ID, and have absolutely zero fear that my own stupidity or inability to pay attention to a thousand things at once is going to get somebody hurt.

Being a pedestrian is the shiat!
 
2013-01-13 04:22:07 PM  

Repo Man: serial_crusher: Carth: I have to say the GoPro camera and their like have made cycling a lot more enjoyable. Every few weeks I hear about an asshole driver who was arrested because of video footage of hitting a cyclist and not stopping.

This.  It might be coincidence, but when I added a clearly visible camera to my helmet, car drivers around me seemed to start behaving themselves a lot better.

That sure didn't seem to help this guy.


Well, I do have my own youTube channel.
That guy's complaining about some pretty benign stuff though.

/Just noticed two of my best videos got deleted somehow.  Thanks, YouTube.
 
2013-01-13 04:22:28 PM  
I love the videos of bicyclists being run over.  I wish they had a channel for that on cable.
 
2013-01-13 04:23:52 PM  
I love to drive my car, and I love to ride my bike.

If you trick yourself into thinking that YOU are the most important thing on the road, it doesn't matter whether you're biking or driving. You're an asshole, and you'll have to live with people treating you like one.

On the other hand, you could think of other people and watch out for them, no matter what you're doing on the road, and people will respect that.

CSB Time:

Yesterday I was at Disney, which is like, a Mecca for rude people or something. Try walking there for more than 5 minutes, you'll be bumped, rammed, or (in my wife's case) pinched.

Anyway, we're getting off this ride, there's a good few people around us, and this kid, about 10 years old, comes running down the walkway behind us, just about bangs into my wife, shoves his way past her, and then proceeds to shove his way between three little girls farther down. No "Scuse me," no "pardon me."

He was too important in his own mind to worry about anybody else. I didn't mind it too much when he shoved past us, but I wanted to just grab his T-shirt and yank him back when I saw him push past someone smaller than him. "Clumsy AND rude is no way to go through life, son!" I yelled after him.

Moral of the story: just treat people decent no matter where you go, and maybe people won't think you're a dick.
 
2013-01-13 04:24:52 PM  
206 comments and not one about lane filtering or lane splitting?

The most hated thing about cyclists is the following: Cyclists lane filtering and causing backups. A cyclist backing up traffic in a one-lane because the same-direction-traffic can't pass at speed and must slow and wait for a passing opportunity. And then everyone gets to a light, and the cyclist lane filters to the front. So the same 20 cars have to slowly pass the cyclist again. Then 2 miles down the road, another light. Repeat.
 
2013-01-13 04:26:08 PM  

Jument: count the drivers who make rolling stops and rolling turns on red.


Does anybody have stats on how many fatalities are caused by this? I'm guessing it's resonable close to zero.
 
2013-01-13 04:27:05 PM  

nickerj1: The most hated thing about cyclists is the following: Cyclists lane filtering and causing backups. A cyclist backing up traffic in a one-lane because the same-direction-traffic can't pass at speed and must slow and wait for a passing opportunity. And then everyone gets to a light, and the cyclist lane filters to the front. So the same 20 cars have to slowly pass the cyclist again. Then 2 miles down the road, another light. Repeat.


Why do you hate a cyclist following the rules of the road as best he is able? Should he just jump on the sidewalk? Run the light so he can get ahead of the pack? Or just not ride his bike at all?
 
2013-01-13 04:29:40 PM  

radarlove: Wow, this thread has made me super happy with my informed decision to be a pedestrian. I can stroll, occasionally even strut. I can listen to an mp3 player while smoking a cigarette or blunt with one hand and eating a cheeseburger with the other. Nobody gives a shiat or even notices me unless I do something stupid and dangerous like cross against the light.

I totally win.


radarlove: Also, there is no need for me to wear wicked gay lycra or reflectors, I don't have to pay tax or registration fees on my shoes, don't have to carry ID, and have absolutely zero fear that my own stupidity or inability to pay attention to a thousand things at once is going to get somebody hurt.

Being a pedestrian is the shiat!


Sooo...how many DUIs did you get before they yanked your driver's license? ;^)
 
2013-01-13 04:30:39 PM  

radarlove: Being a pedestrian is the shiat!


Just don't become a jogger.
 
2013-01-13 04:31:00 PM  
*scans thread, notes some names*

I love this...expects tighter gun laws to save people's lives as people will obey those laws, brags about breaking laws that they don't feel are important.

/shakes head and makes a note to hit Quantum APostrophe if he ever has the chance.
 
2013-01-13 04:34:43 PM  

Kit Fister: I love this...expects tighter gun laws to save people's lives as people will obey those laws, brags about breaking laws that they don't feel are important.


You ever speed in your car?
 
2013-01-13 04:35:41 PM  

theorellior: doyner: I'm looking forward to rinsing you out of my grill one day.

If a cyclist runs a red light and no motorist's right-of-way is infringed, does a driver still get butthurt?


It seems it is so.
 
2013-01-13 04:36:11 PM  

Kit Fister: *scans thread, notes some names*

I love this...expects tighter gun laws to save people's lives as people will obey those laws, brags about breaking laws that they don't feel are important.

/shakes head and makes a note to hit Quantum APostrophe if he ever has the chance.


I love that logic "people don't follow all laws when biking, gun control is useless!"
 
2013-01-13 04:37:48 PM  

stirfrybry: theorellior: doyner: I'm looking forward to rinsing you out of my grill one day.

If a cyclist runs a red light and no motorist's right-of-way is infringed, does a driver still get butthurt?

It seems it is so.


If he's in my grill it's because right-of-way was infringed.
 
2013-01-13 04:37:57 PM  
Friend of mine, and cross country teammate in high school ran over and killed a cyclist like 2 weeks after getting his drivers license.  That really farked him up for a couple of years.  He refused to drive.

/spandexed out, power bar eatin', 9lb bike riding bro/douche had run a VERY red light and my buddies F-150 obliterated his ass - like he was spread out over the course of like 200'.  It was gruesome - he was dismembered as he was dragged under the truck.  I saw the aftermath.  Easily one of the most horrifying things I have ever seen.
//douchebag bike rider had been ticketed 4 times for running a red light in the previous year
///his family had the audacity to sue said 16 year old driver and had their asses handed to them by the judge, especially when the defense presented previous tickets for running a red light 4 times previously
 
2013-01-13 04:39:44 PM  
As a cyclist I'd just like to say how 'bout you drive the way you wanna drive and do your level best not to hit anything or anybody and me & my Trek 1500 will ditto mmmkay?

/I typed slow for you non cyclists, pffftt.
 
2013-01-13 04:40:04 PM  
Last week a cyclist, travelling at night with no lights and wearing dark clothing, blew off a red light and ran into my cousin's atation wagon. He walked away uninjured, acted like a douche and the cop  gave him several tickets. He keeps calling my cousin demanding she replace his bike.

/WTF?
 
2013-01-13 04:40:35 PM  
CSB: While walking downtown a few years ago I was approaching an intersection. A driver coming alongside me got to the four-way intersection and just kept rolling. At the same time an oblivious headphoned jogger reached the crosswalk and didn't even break stride - jogging right into the path of the vehicle. In the next moment, the driver accelerated and the jogger ended up on the hood.
I stopped to make sure she was ok, and both the driver and the jogger started yelling to me, "you saw what happened! She ran out in front of me!", "you saw what happened!! She didn't even stop at the stop sign".
I just said, "You're both right." and kept walking.
 
2013-01-13 04:40:48 PM  

doyner: stirfrybry: theorellior: doyner: I'm looking forward to rinsing you out of my grill one day.

If a cyclist runs a red light and no motorist's right-of-way is infringed, does a driver still get butthurt?

It seems it is so.

If he's in my grill it's because right-of-way was infringed.


So be it.
 
2013-01-13 04:41:16 PM  

theorellior: special20: Why must we have to share the road with the uninsured, untaxed, and unlicensed vehicles?

Because we pay sales taxes too and don't damage the roadbed?


You do when I run you over in my Hummer.
 
2013-01-13 04:41:45 PM  

Quantum Apostrophe: MrHelpful: That wasn't very helpful. People who obey the law can get killed as easily. I look where the hell I am going. Red wavelength photons emanating from a municipal structure are just a guideline for me. Far worse are the cyclists with headphones on, they are ignoring audio cues the entire time they are riding, I'm just running red lights once or twice.

That being said, I am in fairly good shape and have a decent bike. I also shift down when I brake so I can get back to speed easily. So I'm quite agile. When I go camping on my bike and have extra weight on my backpack and can't see as well, I slow down and obey traffic lights more, especially when I'm out of town.

Running red lights is a culture thing here in Montreal. Our drivers can barely master "right on green" so if I stopped at a red light that would be MORE dangerous as no one would expect it!


Best bike crash I ever saw was in Montreal, down by the Bell Center. We were walking around waiting for the Rush concert that evening. My kids were 9 and 13 at the time. The light at the end of the very steep street changed to red.
One of those ultralight bikes with the tires as thick as a pencil decided he was going to go through the red- as evidenced by his speed- and crossed from the leftmost portion of the lane to the right(so he could squeak by.)

The road was wet, his bike started to slip, he applied the brakes and lost control, nailing the small sedan that was at stopped at the light, and involuntarily somersaulted forward; leaving a dent in the trunk, a broken back windshield, and a very confused old guy staring at him when he landed on the hood. He'd vaulted over the roof, his front tire rim looked like pac-man, and the old man exited his car and began to quietly scold him.


The four of us looked at each other in wonder. Did that just happen twenty feet in front of us?
So hard not to laugh until we turned the corner.
 
2013-01-13 04:42:03 PM  
I just want someone to explain the outfits to me.
 
2013-01-13 04:42:07 PM  

Endive Wombat: Friend of mine, and cross country teammate in high school ran over and killed a cyclist like 2 weeks after getting his drivers license.  That really farked him up for a couple of years.  He refused to drive.

/spandexed out, power bar eatin', 9lb bike riding bro/douche had run a VERY red light and my buddies F-150 obliterated his ass - like he was spread out over the course of like 200'.  It was gruesome - he was dismembered as he was dragged under the truck.  I saw the aftermath.  Easily one of the most horrifying things I have ever seen.
//douchebag bike rider had been ticketed 4 times for running a red light in the previous year
///his family had the audacity to sue said 16 year old driver and had their asses handed to them by the judge, especially when the defense presented previous tickets for running a red light 4 times previously


At least he died doing what he loved...being a self-righteous, entitled douchebag.

I feel bad for your friend though.  Shiatty way to start your life as a motorist.
 
2013-01-13 04:42:59 PM  

RedVentrue: theorellior: special20: Why must we have to share the road with the uninsured, untaxed, and unlicensed vehicles?

Because we pay sales taxes too and don't damage the roadbed?

You do when I run you over in my Hummer.


Oooh, oooh, legitimate tough guy. I'll stay away from the roads you deign to share with the rest of us.
 
2013-01-13 04:43:47 PM  

wambu: Last week a cyclist, travelling at night with no lights and wearing dark clothing, blew off a red light and ran into my cousin's atation wagon. He walked away uninjured, acted like a douche and the cop  gave him several tickets. He keeps calling my cousin demanding she replace his bike.

/WTF?


Harassment's also illegal, right?  Glad to see those dickmagnets getting what's coming to them.
 
2013-01-13 04:43:54 PM  

theorellior: doyner: stirfrybry: theorellior: doyner: I'm looking forward to rinsing you out of my grill one day.

If a cyclist runs a red light and no motorist's right-of-way is infringed, does a driver still get butthurt?

It seems it is so.

If he's in my grill it's because right-of-way was infringed.

So be it.


We've agreed to disagree.  If I'm not on the road, I don't have a stake in what happens.  If I'm driving through a green light, I don't appreciate having my day/life disrupted because cyclists feel as though red lights don't apply to them.
 
2013-01-13 04:44:02 PM  
Also, I blame Strava for a lot of recent cycling related douchery. That site seems like it was created to encourage cyclists to drive as fast as possible and ignore all traffic laws.

Just think if there were a similar site for cars that tracks your GPS and encourages you to get from point A to point B faster than your fellow motorists and lets you compare your results to other people with similar cars and driving abilities.
 
2013-01-13 04:45:04 PM  

doyner: We've agreed to disagree. If I'm not on the road, I don't have a stake in what happens. If I'm driving through a green light, I don't appreciate having my day/life disrupted because cyclists feel as though red lights don't apply to them.


For whatever it's worth, I prefer to practice my cycling so that no one's day is disrupted at all.
 
2013-01-13 04:45:23 PM  

nickerj1: 206 comments and not one about lane filtering or lane splitting?

The most hated thing about cyclists is the following: Cyclists lane filtering and causing backups. A cyclist backing up traffic in a one-lane because the same-direction-traffic can't pass at speed and must slow and wait for a passing opportunity. And then everyone gets to a light, and the cyclist lane filters to the front. So the same 20 cars have to slowly pass the cyclist again. Then 2 miles down the road, another light. Repeat.


Such behaviour is inexcusable. When stopped at a red light, I remain behind any vehicles that were already in front of me at the stop.
 
2013-01-13 04:46:48 PM  

skinink: How bicyclists treat pedestrians:
[1.bp.blogspot.com image 472x848]
If I had the money I would pay off every state politician in Massachusetts to pass a law requiring all bicyclists to ride in the road only. I'm tired of the riders who act like they own the sidewalk.


As a city walker and cyclist, I'm in 100% agreement. I had one azzHOLE almost clip my son (three) while we were walking on our block. This was no kid, either, we're talking fully grown adult bum. I will maybe skate a half block or something if I need to, but the damned roads are there for traffic! Put down the cell phone, put on a helmet and act like a driver if you are going to drive that bike.
 
2013-01-13 04:50:54 PM  

TanSau: Don't Troll Me Bro!: Watubi: Tip for bicyclists, if you are really hardcore, you buy the heaviest/crappiest bike available and wear normal clothes if you want to get the best workout.

Don't forget about adding copious amounts of rolling friction.
[i.imgur.com image 730x548]


Don't forget your trainer.
 
2013-01-13 04:51:05 PM  

Stone Meadow: radarlove: Wow, this thread has made me super happy with my informed decision to be a pedestrian. I can stroll, occasionally even strut. I can listen to an mp3 player while smoking a cigarette or blunt with one hand and eating a cheeseburger with the other. Nobody gives a shiat or even notices me unless I do something stupid and dangerous like cross against the light.

I totally win.

radarlove: Also, there is no need for me to wear wicked gay lycra or reflectors, I don't have to pay tax or registration fees on my shoes, don't have to carry ID, and have absolutely zero fear that my own stupidity or inability to pay attention to a thousand things at once is going to get somebody hurt.

Being a pedestrian is the shiat!

Sooo...how many DUIs did you get before they yanked your driver's license? ;^)


Zero. I don't drink and drive (or really drink alcohol at all), I don't go over the speed limit, I signal every turn and lane change, and the only time I've ever been stopped by police was at a DUI checkpoint. I still have my drivers license and it is absolutely pristine. I just prefer to walk, mostly for the reasons stated above.

I was in an accident once though. I was 15 and riding my bike to my first day of work at McDonalds. Some bigass pickup truck decided that the bike lane would be better used as a right-turn lane and without looking to see if I was in it, he ran me over. Destroyed my bike and farked me up pretty badly and then just drove off. I was only a few blocks from work though so I picked up what was left of my bike and limped to McDonalds, where I was promptly fired by my manager who was pissed that I'd shown up to work covered in blood and asphalt.

/csb

theorellior: radarlove: Being a pedestrian is the shiat!

Just don't become a jogger.


I'm a smoker and a toker- no jogging = no problem.
 
2013-01-13 04:52:22 PM  

TV's Vinnie: D-Bag cyclist about to zip past my car.

Open car door innocently.

*P-THUMP!*

Bask in the glory.

Then, get cyclist's name in order to have car door repaired by his insurance. Sue him if he doesn't have one. Further bask in greater glory.


In my state (and in all others that I'm aware of), the car drivers are at fault in these situations, so this tactic of yours will fail.
 
2013-01-13 04:55:15 PM  

Endive Wombat: Friend of mine, and cross country teammate in high school ran over and killed a cyclist like 2 weeks after getting his drivers license.  That really farked him up for a couple of years.  He refused to drive.

/spandexed out, power bar eatin', 9lb bike riding bro/douche had run a VERY red light and my buddies F-150 obliterated his ass - like he was spread out over the course of like 200'.  It was gruesome - he was dismembered as he was dragged under the truck.  I saw the aftermath.  Easily one of the most horrifying things I have ever seen.
//douchebag bike rider had been ticketed 4 times for running a red light in the previous year
///his family had the audacity to sue said 16 year old driver and had their asses handed to them by the judge, especially when the defense presented previous tickets for running a red light 4 times previously


That's a real shame. It's a horrible experience for a young driver...or anyone for that matter. I almost hit a motorcyclist shortly after getting my license. It was a real world learning experience that I carry with me to this day. As a motorist you have to watch for more than just other cars...motorcycles, bikes, and pedestrians can be hard to see if you aren't ACTIVELY looking for them. As a current motorcyclist and former bicyclist I know that many other motorists have never learned that lesson.
 
2013-01-13 04:55:45 PM  

Smarshmallow: TV's Vinnie: D-Bag cyclist about to zip past my car.

Open car door innocently.

*P-THUMP!*

Bask in the glory.

Then, get cyclist's name in order to have car door repaired by his insurance. Sue him if he doesn't have one. Further bask in greater glory.

In my state (and in all others that I'm aware of), the car drivers are at fault in these situations, so this tactic of yours will fail.


Yeah.  You don't open your door when a car is coming, so why be a dick when a bike is hugging the right side of the outer lane?

Don't be a dick...whether in a car or on 2 wheels.  Why is this so hard?
 
2013-01-13 04:56:20 PM  

megarian: I just want someone to explain the outfits to me.


Do you wish an explanation for my jeans, for my T-shirt, for my windbreaker or for my fanny pack?
 
2013-01-13 04:57:10 PM  

Dimensio: megarian: I just want someone to explain the outfits to me.

Do you wish an explanation for my jeans, for my T-shirt, for my windbreaker or for my fanny pack?


Yes.  Explain yourself.
 
2013-01-13 04:57:15 PM  

doyner: Endive Wombat: Friend of mine, and cross country teammate in high school ran over and killed a cyclist like 2 weeks after getting his drivers license.  That really farked him up for a couple of years.  He refused to drive.

/spandexed out, power bar eatin', 9lb bike riding bro/douche had run a VERY red light and my buddies F-150 obliterated his ass - like he was spread out over the course of like 200'.  It was gruesome - he was dismembered as he was dragged under the truck.  I saw the aftermath.  Easily one of the most horrifying things I have ever seen.
//douchebag bike rider had been ticketed 4 times for running a red light in the previous year
///his family had the audacity to sue said 16 year old driver and had their asses handed to them by the judge, especially when the defense presented previous tickets for running a red light 4 times previously

At least he died doing what he loved...being a self-righteous, entitled douchebag.

I feel bad for your friend though.  Shiatty way to start your life as a motorist.


Yeah, it was shiatty all around.  But I learned a VERY important lesson that day.  No matter how entitled or even technically "right" you are as a cyclist, you still have to contend with objects that weigh many thousands of pounds and move faster than you will ever do so.  Therefore, while they should technically treat you as an equal (they don't), or at least something that is fragile (they don't)...you have a responsibility to yourself to be a good steward of the road and be on the defense on busy roads.  Your safety is your responsibility, and while righteous indignation may have a place in society at large, on the road, it does not matter, you as a cyclist lose against a car...be on the defense of your own safety and don't be a dick.
 
2013-01-13 04:58:35 PM  
Thistbreadagain.jpg
 
2013-01-13 04:59:34 PM  

theorellior: Kit Fister: I love this...expects tighter gun laws to save people's lives as people will obey those laws, brags about breaking laws that they don't feel are important.

You ever speed in your car?


I think the point of my statement was not that lawbreaking wouldn't happen or that I didn't do it. What I'm saying is that it's rather ironic to brag about breaking the law and turn around and demand more laws.
 
2013-01-13 05:02:16 PM  

radarlove: Stone Meadow: Sooo...how many DUIs did you get before they yanked your driver's license? ;^)

Zero. I don't drink and drive (or really drink alcohol at all), I don't go over the speed limit, I signal every turn and lane change, and the only time I've ever been stopped by police was at a DUI checkpoint. I still have my drivers license and it is absolutely pristine. I just prefer to walk, mostly for the reasons stated above.


Imma go with "he totally missed the winkie face" interpretation. ;^)
 
2013-01-13 05:03:40 PM  

doyner: Dimensio: megarian: I just want someone to explain the outfits to me.

Do you wish an explanation for my jeans, for my T-shirt, for my windbreaker or for my fanny pack?

Yes.  Explain yourself.


Right then. Jersies are grnarally technical fabrics that wick sweat away from your skin. They are cutclong so as not to ride up your back when riding, and have big pockets because its a convenient way to carry stuff. Shorts are tight so that loose fabric doesnt chafe your thighs to hell and gone.

Any further questions?
 
2013-01-13 05:04:38 PM  
Cyclist in the Bay Area.
Just Strava'd my morning ride about an hour ago.

This is how we view other humans, and the world in general (especially the Aussie guy in the vid).
Link  (Not safe for anyone)

Headphones at work recommended.
 
2013-01-13 05:07:10 PM  
phawker.comView Full Size
 
2013-01-13 05:07:20 PM  

Dimensio: megarian: I just want someone to explain the outfits to me.

Do you wish an explanation for my jeans, for my T-shirt, for my windbreaker or for my fanny pack?


The fanny pack would be a good start.

/I keed
//I still want to know about the outfits. I'm a girl and I don't think I own anything that tight.
///if you got it, flaunt it?
 
2013-01-13 05:07:29 PM  

fireclown: doyner: Dimensio: megarian: I just want someone to explain the outfits to me.

Do you wish an explanation for my jeans, for my T-shirt, for my windbreaker or for my fanny pack?

Yes.  Explain yourself.

Right then. Jersies are grnarally technical fabrics that wick sweat away from your skin. They are cutclong so as not to ride up your back when riding, and have big pockets because its a convenient way to carry stuff. Shorts are tight so that loose fabric doesnt chafe your thighs to hell and gone.

Any further questions?


I bolded fanny pack.  You aren't seriously defending those.
 
2013-01-13 05:08:06 PM  
Wow. I saw the PBS strip yesterday and thought, "This is to Fark as live chickens is to a pen full of Jack Russell terriers on crack"

Viola! Today's Bike Hate Thread (BHT)!

Having survived 18,000 miles of Philly bike commuting over the years, riding on the sidewalk, riding against traffic, running lights, stopsigns, getting shot with paintballs, having bottles thrown at me, etc., I have but one PRIMARY piece of advice for you:

ASSUME CARS WANT TO KILL YOU AND RIDE ACCORDINGLY

Ride against traffic so you can see and avoid them. Ride on the sidewalk to minimize your exposure to them. DON'T blindly blow through lights and stopsigns, for they may be lying in wait to get you. Scan completely before going through.

Don't ride like a dick on the sidewalk. Dive into the street when a group of people come down the sidewalk. Dive into the sidewalk when another biker comes down the bikelane going the "right" way. If they like getting it in the ass, they eventually will get their wish while riding with the traffic. Knew people killed like that.

I'm done with Philly bike commuting, since I'm retiring in the spring. In retirement, I will enjoy my new Cannondale Jekyll 4, given to me free by Cannondale (retails $3200) since I basically fatigued out my Cannondale Police Cruiser after 13,000 miles and the frame snapped. Gotta luv them lifetime warranties!

Don't wear goofy biker outfits. It attracts abuse. Dress like a south Philly dude who dun lost his license after a few too many DUI's. Someone you don't want to mess with.

Light up your bike. Front flashing light, back flashing light, even side flashing lights that plug into the ends of the handlebars. Plus reflectors, lots and lots of reflectors.....

Cute little bing-bing bell for gently warning peds you're behind them, plus frickin' LOUD airhorn for scaring cars...

You have no rights, no power, no influence. You are an opportunistic parasite in a high speed, high powered rush-rush society. You exploit the niches, the cracks, the little openings in the maelstrom. You bob and weave, shuckin' and jiving, almost cat like, as you thread your way through the mayhem.Never confront. Go around, flee, use the terrain and the parked cars, and poles, and curbs as your shields, your refuge.

It will make you stronger and more independent than the rage cagers can possibly imagine...
 
2013-01-13 05:09:00 PM  
Another Fark cycling thread.

let me sum up the whole thread-

cyclists- you can't be delayed 5 seconds?
Drivers- obey the laws of the road.
cyclists- Get over yourself drivers
Drivers- Spandex

How to solve every problem--
Don't be a d-bag in a car or on a bike.
 
2013-01-13 05:09:41 PM  
As long as bicyclists never affect the flow motorized traffic I have no problem with them.
 
2013-01-13 05:10:36 PM  

mark12A: Wow. I saw the PBS strip yesterday and thought, "This is to Fark as live chickens is to a pen full of Jack Russell terriers on crack"

Viola! Today'