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(Gawker)   How to not die of the flu   (gawker.com) divider line 148
    More: PSA, Purell, urgent care, flu  
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14859 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Jan 2013 at 9:33 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-01-12 09:35:28 PM
 
2013-01-12 09:36:07 PM
step 1: don't die the flu

step 2: don't die
 
2013-01-12 09:36:59 PM
FFff PREVIEW first you numbskull!

*don't GET the flu
 
2013-01-12 09:37:13 PM
Wash your hands prior to picking your nose.
 
2013-01-12 09:37:30 PM
1. Don't have kids

Those little farkers are breeders of disease
 
2013-01-12 09:37:50 PM
be polite to every health care provider you encounter

This will help if your health care provider has a gun.
 
2013-01-12 09:39:16 PM
For women: Drink semen.
 
2013-01-12 09:41:53 PM

AliceBToklasLives: Wash your hands prior to picking your nose.


...SHIAT!!!!
 
2013-01-12 09:42:52 PM
FTA: The following substances are not at all effective in treating or preventing the flu:
...
Elderberry
...


There was a doctor on national news last night, pretty sure it was ABC, telling people to grab some elderberry and turmeric.
 
2013-01-12 09:43:38 PM
fta The following substances are not at all effective in treating or preventing the flu:
Elderberry


Also, then you will smell of them and perhaps change your mother into a hamster
 
2013-01-12 09:45:27 PM
no suggestion of just being a hermit?
 
2013-01-12 09:45:56 PM
Is it just me or was that possibly the must useful article ever to emerge from Gawker?
 
2013-01-12 09:46:14 PM
Don't get it?
 
2013-01-12 09:47:05 PM
If you decide to not get vaccinated and you get a disease then please, please do not hang out with other people.
 
2013-01-12 09:47:19 PM

Harry_Seldon: 1. Don't have kids

Those little farkers are breeders of disease


THIS.

My freaking two nieces are insane germ factories. I and the rest of us have had:

Ear infections
Bronchitis
Numerous colds
Chicken Pox (age age 42, thanks to Dad, the nieces might get off this one)
Norovirus
Stomache Flu (ask how I Know the difference)
Pink Eye

It's one after the other after the other after the other.

No. Nope. Not. Non. Nicht. Noo. Desist.
 
2013-01-12 09:48:23 PM
Have a mother that's an RN so you get free vaccinations every fall.
 
2013-01-12 09:49:13 PM
Gawker, where I always go to get my informed medical decisions.
 
2013-01-12 09:49:42 PM

UsikFark: FTA: The following substances are not at all effective in treating or preventing the flu:
...
Elderberry
...

There was a doctor on national news last night, pretty sure it was ABC, telling people to grab some elderberry and turmeric.


What a topsy-turvy mixed-up world of craptastic media we live in when it falls to a gossip rag like the Gawker to provide rational medical advice that goes so far as to actively dismiss quackery rather than encourage it.
 
2013-01-12 09:50:45 PM
No thanks.

I'll take my chances.

yes I do believe in vaccines but not for every little thing.

Health and near middle aged and interact with few people directly. (not many people get close when you're welding)
 
2013-01-12 09:52:35 PM

Znuh: Harry_Seldon: 1. Don't have kids

Those little farkers are breeders of disease

THIS.

My freaking two nieces are insane germ factories. I and the rest of us have had:

Ear infections
Bronchitis
Numerous colds
Chicken Pox (age age 42, thanks to Dad, the nieces might get off this one)
Norovirus
Stomache Flu (ask how I Know the difference)
Pink Eye

It's one after the other after the other after the other.

No. Nope. Not. Non. Nicht. Noo. Desist.


You could stop sticking your fingers up your nose after you visit them. And try washing your hands before you eat anything.

Seriously. The best way to transmit cold & flu virus is to touch your nose and eyes--gives the little f*ckers a direct route into your mucus membranes. Keep your hands away from your eyes and nose and you lower your risk of catching anything. As to the GI viruses, well, they tell you to WASH YOUR HANDS after using the bathroom for a reason, dummy.

The chicken pox, that's a different story. You have my sympathy there.
 
2013-01-12 09:53:02 PM
1) Quit being crybabies and Get the damn flu.
2) Let your immune system handle it.
3) Be immune to that flu strain forever.
Worked for our ancestors for thousands and thousands of years.
 
2013-01-12 09:53:28 PM
It's easier to recompile your immunity with dead virus and get stronger, than brute-crack and kill a live, nasty and pissed off virus.

Plus you won't feel like dying.

Or dying for that matter.

/Fark Jenny McCarthy.
 
2013-01-12 09:54:21 PM

voltOhm: 1) Quit being crybabies and Get the damn flu.
2) Let your immune system handle it.
3) Be immune to that flu strain forever.
Worked for our ancestors for thousands and thousands of years.



Especially around 1918.
 
2013-01-12 09:55:10 PM

Znuh: It's easier to recompile your immunity with dead virus and get stronger, than brute-crack and kill a live, nasty and pissed off virus.

Plus you won't feel like dying.

Or dying for that matter.

/Fark Jenny McCarthy.


More of this.

/Science, it works
 
2013-01-12 09:56:19 PM

KentuckyBob: Gawker, where I always go to get my informed medical decisions.


s51.radikal.ru
 
2013-01-12 09:58:39 PM

Gyrfalcon: You could stop sticking your fingers up your nose after you visit them. And try washing your hands before you eat anything.


Sigh. I wish.

(No, I'm not advocating rampant nose-pickery).

Mom's a former RN, so I understand and implement the no eyes / face / mouth thing, and know to properly scrub for at least 30 seconds.

The thing is, when they visit (which is often) they get into everything. If you're not careful - wash and then use a towel they've used - bingo. Cutlery they've decided to play with, which is then put back in the drawer. It gets to the point where the vectors for infection are so omnipotent, you either have to boil, bleach and sterilize everything. At which point, they come back the next day and demolish the house again.

Don't get me wrong, they're kids, and I love them dearly. It's incredible to see just how pervasive disease can be.
 
2013-01-12 09:59:22 PM
I pity the flu!


What's my prediction if you catch the flu? Pain.

img402.imageshack.us

 
2013-01-12 09:59:35 PM
Having a nearly invincible immune system has its advantages. The allergies are annoying, though.

/as are debilitating migraines
 
2013-01-12 09:59:57 PM
2 step process to not dying of the flu:

-Drink water until the fluids ejecting from either of your evacuation holes is pale/clear. When you get there, do a glass an hour.

-If your temperature goes above 102F for more than an hour, or if you sustain a temperature over 99F for more than 24hours, go to the emergency room.
 
2013-01-12 10:00:30 PM
All I know is I am not getting vaccinated, so I encourage you folks to vaccinate up.

Sincerely and Thank you.
 
2013-01-12 10:01:21 PM

voltOhm: 1) Quit being crybabies and Get the damn flu.
2) Let your immune system handle it.
3) Be immune to that flu strain forever.
Worked for our ancestors for thousands and thousands of years.


1) Take your own advice.
2) Die.
3) Fark becomes just a little bit saner.
 
2013-01-12 10:01:31 PM
FTA: They're sorry about the size of the bill you're going to get in the mail in five weeks, too.


I doubt it. Judging from my experiences with people in health care, they probably don't have any better idea how money relates to the things they do than you do, and quite likely a worse one.

That goes double for the people who have to code procedures and send out bills. I'm not sure those people even understand what money or medicine are, let alone how the two interact.

/ In any other industry, billing being so consistently farked all to hell would be considered intolerable, and would get people fired and whole businesses shut down until shiat started working right.
 
2013-01-12 10:03:25 PM

voltOhm: 1) Quit being crybabies and Get the damn flu.
2) Let your immune system handle it.
3) Be immune to that flu strain forever.
Worked for our ancestors for thousands and thousands of years.


Too bad viruses evolve quickly, such that we need a new flu shot each year.
 
2013-01-12 10:04:01 PM
Why you layin' round without a single look, when you could just read this simple book?

"So You Have The Flu" by Sun Tzu.

blogs.laweekly.com
 
2013-01-12 10:07:07 PM

whatshisname: voltOhm: 1) Quit being crybabies and Get the damn flu.
2) Let your immune system handle it.
3) Be immune to that flu strain forever.
Worked for our ancestors for thousands and thousands of years.


Especially around 1918.


Fun fact: 2009's "swine flu" and the 1918 "Spanish flu" were both H1N1. The ancestor thing didn't work out too well.
 
2013-01-12 10:08:35 PM
I'm not an anti-vaxxer and for most of the vaccines I think that people absolutely should get them. That being said the Flu vaccines are, in my opinion, more harmful than helpful for most people (excluding the people most at risk of course). There are currently 4 active flu strain vaccines out there so that means that there's a 3 out of 4 chance that you got the wrong one. This leads to a lot of people walking around with a false sense of security that can lead to perhaps not taking the usual hygienic precautions that they should be taking (because after all, they are "protected" right? It just must be a cold and not the flu.).

Forget the Mercury or whatever else the loonies say is the problem. While it may be an issue for a very small portion of the population, the real problem is people walking around with a false sense of security. No flu shot means that you will (or at least should) be more aware of the people around you and allows you to take the proper precautions. Now then, if you're in a job that requires a lot of interpersonal contact with a lot of different people then by all means go get the shot but be aware that the odds are against you having the right flu shot and that you still need to always act like you didn't have one.
 
2013-01-12 10:09:04 PM
Anyone else read their comment section? Sounds like a lotta their readers are going to get the flue by being idiots.

There's not much herbal supplements can do. Sure many have been turned into prescription grade medications, but only after much refinement. Besides, back in the day when these were mainly the only things around, people had the immune systems of battleships -- at least those who managed to live beyond 4 yrs old.

Get the vaccinations and increase your chances of not getting the disease. Ignore the crap going around about them being a money making scheme, being full of Mercury or creating ADD or ADHD or whateverthef**k years down the road. It's all bullshiat.

Since the national population has tripled since the 50's, you stand a much greater chance of getting an airborne disease than your parents did. Science fact: increase the population and increase the incidents of disease.

Basically, eat healthier, knock back a few supplements, mainly B laden, add a few fruits, drink plenty of fluids and get rest. You should be fine. If you live in a small town, you have less of a chance of getting the bug. If you live in a major city like NYC, Chicago or Vegas, you have a much larger chance of being infected.

BTW, home made chicken soup is a good thing. Don't know why, but even physicians agree. So is V-8 vegetable juice. And wash your darn hands! Especially after using the can. With soap! That quick rinse under the running water doesn't do squat.
 
2013-01-12 10:11:15 PM
Sadly, I don't think they disclose which flavor of Flu Shot you're getting. I DJ for a living, so I'm surrounded by well, tons of people in clubs, and I travel through a lot of states on any given month. For example, the end of this month it's MD to ME and back, then next week, MD to RI.

I'm still going to go to Walgreens / Racket of Choice and get the shot they've got down here. I'm half tempted to get another shot when I'm further North in the hopes it's for a different variety of Flu.
 
2013-01-12 10:13:59 PM

Rik01: BTW, home made chicken soup is a good thing. Don't know why, but even physicians agree. So is V-8 vegetable juice. And wash your darn hands! Especially after using the can. With soap! That quick rinse under the running water doesn't do squat.


I think that chicken soup helps to reduce congestion by making your body want to hold on to white blood cells longer, or at least that's what I've heard.
 
2013-01-12 10:14:12 PM

mrlewish: No thanks.

I'll take my chances.

yes I do believe in vaccines but not for every little thing.

Health and near middle aged and interact with few people directly. (not many people get close when you're welding)


I hope you get swine flu. It nearly killed my father. He learned his lesson, maybe you'll learn yours.
 
2013-01-12 10:15:28 PM
Is this where I come to state how the flu vaccine is the biggest con since the bait and switch?
 
2013-01-12 10:15:35 PM

MurphyMurphy: 2 step process to not dying of the flu:

-Drink water until the fluids ejecting from either of your evacuation holes is pale/clear. When you get there, do a glass an hour.

-If your temperature goes above 102F for more than an hour, or if you sustain a temperature over 99F for more than 24hours, go to the emergency room.


Go to the emergency room? 99F is not even considered a fever. 102F is a moderate fever but a little Tylenol would knock that down. The emergency room?  Really?
 
2013-01-12 10:17:28 PM

Radioactive Ass: There are currently 4 active flu strain vaccines out there so that means that there's a 3 out of 4 chance that you got the wrong one.


Znuh: I don't think they disclose which flavor of Flu Shot you're getting.


The flu vaccine contains a mix of three strains. What bullshiat source is saying you get only one per shot?

There are three types, but the ONLY difference is the dose. Not the mix.
 
2013-01-12 10:20:59 PM

UsikFark: Radioactive Ass: There are currently 4 active flu strain vaccines out there so that means that there's a 3 out of 4 chance that you got the wrong one.

Znuh: I don't think they disclose which flavor of Flu Shot you're getting.

The flu vaccine contains a mix of three strains. What bullshiat source is saying you get only one per shot?

There are three types, but the ONLY difference is the dose. Not the mix.


Dude, thanks for clearing that up. Phew!
 
2013-01-12 10:21:23 PM

Znuh: Sadly, I don't think they disclose which flavor of Flu Shot you're getting. I DJ for a living, so I'm surrounded by well, tons of people in clubs, and I travel through a lot of states on any given month. For example, the end of this month it's MD to ME and back, then next week, MD to RI.

I'm still going to go to Walgreens / Racket of Choice and get the shot they've got down here. I'm half tempted to get another shot when I'm further North in the hopes it's for a different variety of Flu.


Don't waste your time getting the shot elsewhere; get your flu shot locally. There is only one shot for the season.

On February 23, 2012 the WHO recommended that the Northern Hemisphere's 2012-2013 seasonal influenza vaccine be made from the following three vaccine viruses:

an A/California/7/2009 (H1N1)pdm09-like virus;
an A/Victoria/361/2011 (H3N2)-like virus;
a B/Wisconsin/1/2010-like virus (from the B/Yamagata lineage of viruses).


Info from the CDC.
 
2013-01-12 10:22:10 PM

Radioactive Ass: I'm not an anti-vaxxer and for most of the vaccines I think that people absolutely should get them. That being said the Flu vaccines are, in my opinion, more harmful than helpful for most people (excluding the people most at risk of course). There are currently 4 active flu strain vaccines out there so that means that there's a 3 out of 4 chance that you got the wrong one. This leads to a lot of people walking around with a false sense of security that can lead to perhaps not taking the usual hygienic precautions that they should be taking (because after all, they are "protected" right? It just must be a cold and not the flu.).


The flu vaccine works against several strains. They pick the most common ones and bundle them into one shot. You are pretty much protected throughout the flu season once the shot did it's work.
 
2013-01-12 10:22:31 PM

UsikFark: whatshisname: voltOhm: 1) Quit being crybabies and Get the damn flu.
2) Let your immune system handle it.
3) Be immune to that flu strain forever.
Worked for our ancestors for thousands and thousands of years.


Especially around 1918.

Fun fact: 2009's "swine flu" and the 1918 "Spanish flu" were both H1N1. The ancestor thing didn't work out too well.


Actually, it did.

People who got the 1918 flu didn't die of the 2009.

H1N1 is bad for young people because of cytokine storms. But if you survive, you're good.
 
2013-01-12 10:22:58 PM

ruta: Don't waste your time getting the shot elsewhere; get your flu shot locally. There is only one shot for the season.


Many thanks, Ruta!
 
2013-01-12 10:23:02 PM

i_dig_chicks: Is this where I come to state how the flu vaccine is the biggest con since the bait and switch?


Yep.  Though you'll be sad to know someone in the Gawker comments already beat you to it.

I don't see "Wake up, sheeple!" in there, though.  You could still get that one if you want.
 
2013-01-12 10:24:16 PM

Radioactive Ass: There are currently 4 active flu strain vaccines out there so that means that there's a 3 out of 4 chance that you got the wrong one


The vaccine includes multiple strains.
 
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