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(The Raw Story)   The United States is in the middle of three epidemics right now - flu, whooping cough and 'winter vomiting disease'   (rawstory.com) divider line 15
    More: Scary, norovirus, United States, whooping cough, stomach virus, epidemics, infectious diseases, Anthony Fauci, winter vomiting  
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7797 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Jan 2013 at 3:00 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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2013-01-12 04:42:13 AM  
4 votes:

ChewbaccaJones: Crazy bug: it hits within a couple of hours; makes it so you can't stand or even sit up without using all your energy; fever, spewing out of every orifice...seriously: the shiattiest I remember feeling in the past few years.


I'll just repeat my post from the last flu thread about Norovirus:

-------------------------------------------------------
I got Norovirus two years ago when it was going around Northern Virginia.  It's an illness so insidious I simultaneously threw up and shiat my pants in a Metro station and I had to be carried out on a gurney.

It is terrifying to be so sick you can't prevent yourself from shiatting your pants.  I prided myself up until that point that in my entire adult life, I had never vomited where I didn't want to, and I had never shiat my pants.  Then in one terrifying day, both records were shattered.  I felt fine in the morning and I was in the hospital that night.

I'd also like to eternally thank the group of teenagers who took pictures of me collapsed on the floor of the metro station, covered in puke, while helpfully pointing out "Dawg shiat himself!  Got shiat all over!"  That was helpful.  I really appreciate it.
2013-01-12 03:14:25 AM  
3 votes:
i.imgur.com

/It isn't serious until you've shat a weasel.
2013-01-12 01:13:47 AM  
2 votes:
I haven't had a jab in years, as long as Mom sends the cheese sandwiches downstairs on time, I'm immune.
2013-01-12 12:27:37 AM  
2 votes:
And people laugh at the basement dwellers!
2013-01-12 05:59:40 AM  
1 votes:
I'd also like to eternally thank the group of teenagers who took pictures of me collapsed on the floor of the metro station, covered in puke, while helpfully pointing out "Dawg shiat himself!  Got shiat all over!"  That was helpful.  I really appreciate it.

On nice thought is that anyone likely to be close enough to take photos has a very high chance of catching the virus too.
2013-01-12 03:27:11 AM  
1 votes:
I've been a bit stuffy, and have had a stuff neck, which happens to me when I'm getting sick. But I just consider that par for winter, really.

I don't want that vomiting shiat, flu is doable.

/you too have awoken at least once with your head stuck in the taco eating position.
2013-01-12 03:27:02 AM  
1 votes:
Flu: get vaccinated. Reduces risk >60%
Whooping cough: get vaccinated. Reduces risk >80%
Norovirus:ffffffark (I teach and live with 3 kids who go to 3 different schools. It's a rare winter day when someone ISN'T coughing, sneezing, fevering and/or vomiting.)
2013-01-12 03:19:32 AM  
1 votes:

BronyMedic: The My Little Pony Killer: The last time I had the flu, it was nine hours of explosions followed by a day and a half of being sore and fatigued. Bring it.

Are you sure you're not mistaking playing Ace Combat 6?


Quite sure. And if I ever find the idiot who decided to cart around her sick infant (who I caught it from) I'm going to give her a good hard punch to the uterus.
2013-01-12 03:17:34 AM  
1 votes:

The My Little Pony Killer: The last time I had the flu, it was nine hours of explosions followed by a day and a half of being sore and fatigued. Bring it.


Are you sure you're not mistaking playing Ace Combat 6?
2013-01-12 03:13:38 AM  
1 votes:
I've got an ear infection. Constantly bucking the trends, that's me.

/I had whooping cough before it was an epidemic.
//And some other stuff but you probably haven't heard of any of them.
2013-01-12 03:12:55 AM  
1 votes:

BronyMedic: Jenny McCarthy won it in 2008 for being a crank.


As a longtime fan of Randi: How the fark have I never heard about the Pigasus Awards before now? HAH. Excellent.
2013-01-12 03:09:22 AM  
1 votes:

Fluorescent Testicle: No, wait, not a Nobel Prize, what's that other one..


upload.wikimedia.org 


Jenny McCarthy won it in 2008 for being a crank.
2013-01-12 03:07:39 AM  
1 votes:
Jenny McCarthy deserves a Nobel Prize for this.

No, wait, not a Nobel Prize, what's that other one... Oh yeah, a punch to the face.
2013-01-12 01:53:47 AM  
1 votes:
No captain tripps yet.  I just got over....something  What they call it doesn't matter  It was eight days of I don't like food and why does it sound like I'm peeing while I poop.  Hope this word picture takes you back to that toilet bowl nightmare you hoped to forget.
2013-01-12 12:21:59 AM  
1 votes:
zombies man, it's the start of zombie apocalypse!
 
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