Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Yahoo)   DHS advises everybody to disable Java immediately. Purple alert   (finance.yahoo.com ) divider line
    More: Scary, Department of Homeland Security, Java, DHS advises, computer users, hacking attacks, Redwood Shores, web application, Sun Microsystems  
•       •       •

24499 clicks; posted to Geek » on 11 Jan 2013 at 8:29 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



176 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2013-01-11 09:00:38 PM  
My browser runs much faster now. Thank you anonymous hacker benefactors!
 
2013-01-11 09:01:27 PM  
Another day, another Java zero day.
 
2013-01-11 09:01:54 PM  
Firefox + NoScript + AdBlock Plus + Ghostery is pretty secure.

After that, it's just a matter of doing a little research and having a little common sense. For example, don't click 'Yes' to everything on the web. Clicked 'Yes' to install a 'movie downloader?' You just got hacked. Opened up that 'penis enlargement' e-mail attachment? You just got hacked. Downloaded the first search result you found on P2P? You better believe you just got hacked.
 
2013-01-11 09:02:19 PM  

MrEricSir: Jon iz teh kewl: and anyone with an Android phone, throw them away

If you got an Oracle JVM to run on Android, I'd be impressed.


that's trivial. there's production apps out there if you're too nerfheaded to do it from scratch.
 
2013-01-11 09:02:43 PM  
more info :http://www.theregister.co.uk/2013/01/10/java_0day/1. go to this site - read and do according to your browser:   http://nakedsecurity.sophos.com/2012/08/30/how-turn-off-java-browser/ 2.You can confirm that Java is no longer installed by visiting http://java.com. Click "Do I have Java?" Click verify and confirm that it says "No working Java was detected on your system."3. don't install it until there is a patch
 
2013-01-11 09:03:25 PM  

Amos Quito: Done, long ago. (Firefox)

Sure, it's a bit of a PITA when I have to "allow" certain websites to view videos, features, etc, but pages load much more quickly, and coupled with adblock, I don't see 99% of the shiat.

Happy days.


Actually, not "JavaScript" per your link, but "Java", a different, but similarly-named beast:

http://www.kb.cert.org/vuls/id/625617

http://www.zdnet.com/homeland-security-warns-to-disable-java-amid-ze ro -day-flaw-7000009713/
 
2013-01-11 09:04:39 PM  
When I turn off Java I get this message from Fark
"Please turn on JavaScript for a better user experience"
No frickin security threat or the pissin DHS is going to keep me from having a better Farking user experience!

/also the nifty little reply button thingy don't work either
 
2013-01-11 09:04:46 PM  

davidphogan: How do you disable a province in Indonesia?


Tell them their shipment of dogs has arrived.
 
2013-01-11 09:06:40 PM  

DownDaRiver: When I turn off Java I get this message from Fark
"Please turn on JavaScript for a better user experience"
No frickin security threat or the pissin DHS is going to keep me from having a better Farking user experience!

/also the nifty little reply button thingy don't work either


Um... since when did DHS say anything about disabling Javascript?
 
2013-01-11 09:07:53 PM  

TEG24601: You only need to disable the browser Plugin, and not run software that you don't know and trust.


But that browser bar said if I installed it, I'd get 4% off every sixth sub at my local Sub Commander Sandwich Shoppe.
 
2013-01-11 09:07:56 PM  

This Face Left Blank: A security flaw in Java? Unpossible!


Talk to any dumbass Dev that turned into a Java whore and they'll swear up and down to you stupid unfounded sh*t like "the sandbox is secure" and other religious beliefs masquerading as science.
 
2013-01-11 09:08:37 PM  
Amos Quito: Done, long ago. (Firefox)

Sure, it's a bit of a PITA when I have to "allow" certain websites to view videos, features, etc, but pages load much more quickly, and coupled with adblock, I don't see 99% of the shiat.

Happy days.

JungleBoogie: Actually, not "JavaScript" per your link, but "Java", a different, but similarly-named beast:

http://www.kb.cert.org/vuls/id/625617

http://www.zdnet.com/homeland-security-warns-to-disable-java-amid-ze ro -day-flaw-7000009713/


Actually, I spoke too soon - apparently no-script does also disable Java from executing in the browser too:

"The NoScript Firefox extension provides extra protection for Firefox, Seamonkey and other mozilla-based browsers: this free, open source add-on allows JavaScript, Java, Flash and other plugins to be executed only by trusted web sites of your choice (e.g. your online bank)." -- from http://noscript.net/
 
2013-01-11 09:08:56 PM  

DownDaRiver: When I turn off Java I get this message from Fark
"Please turn on JavaScript for a better user experience"


You might notice that these words are different...
 
2013-01-11 09:09:29 PM  
Nee Java no badda
Nee chaade su goodie
 
2013-01-11 09:09:53 PM  
I'd rather just disable the DHS instead.
 
2013-01-11 09:11:46 PM  

MrEricSir: Um... since when did DHS say anything about disabling Javascript?


Company I worked for in the early 00's brought over a senior software engineer from India. Her resume was spectacular. She was going to revolutionize the way we wrote software. Turned out she was an idiot and lied on her resume to get sponsored and her expenses paid to come to the US. Her inability to understand that Java and Javascript are very different technologies was one of the first signs that someone made a huge mistake.

/Don't expect the average internet user to understand the difference
 
2013-01-11 09:12:15 PM  
As someone who works with government agencies (including DHS) who use Java applets on a daily basis, I'm getting a kick out of the idea that DHS is supposedly suggesting people disable their Java plugins.
 
2013-01-11 09:12:17 PM  
Meanwhile, .NET Framework wuvs you.
 
2013-01-11 09:13:35 PM  
shiat, I don't have java plugins or some java version under my installed applications. I guess I never installed it on this particular computer.

Interestingly enough, my next course in my degree track is likely either Java programming or C++.
 
2013-01-11 09:17:16 PM  

JungleBoogie: Amos Quito: Done, long ago. (Firefox)

Sure, it's a bit of a PITA when I have to "allow" certain websites to view videos, features, etc, but pages load much more quickly, and coupled with adblock, I don't see 99% of the shiat.

Happy days.

JungleBoogie: Actually, not "JavaScript" per your link, but "Java", a different, but similarly-named beast:

http://www.kb.cert.org/vuls/id/625617

http://www.zdnet.com/homeland-security-warns-to-disable-java-amid-ze ro -day-flaw-7000009713/

Actually, I spoke too soon - apparently no-script does also disable Java from executing in the browser too:

"The NoScript Firefox extension provides extra protection for Firefox, Seamonkey and other mozilla-based browsers: this free, open source add-on allows JavaScript, Java, Flash and other plugins to be executed only by trusted web sites of your choice (e.g. your online bank)." -- from http://noscript.net/


Thanks for the link. I might have to download firefox and try it.
 
2013-01-11 09:18:02 PM  

MrEricSir: DownDaRiver: When I turn off Java I get this message from Fark
"Please turn on JavaScript for a better user experience"
No frickin security threat or the pissin DHS is going to keep me from having a better Farking user experience!

/also the nifty little reply button thingy don't work either

Um... since when did DHS say anything about disabling Javascript?


Uh...it was supposed to be sorta a joke


/jackass
 
2013-01-11 09:18:17 PM  
To Sir
 
2013-01-11 09:19:35 PM  
Why in the hell should we trust  anything DHS says?
 
2013-01-11 09:22:32 PM  

Bleck: Went to check it- I never installed it when I reinstalled windows and didnt notice.


Same here...crisis averted!
 
2013-01-11 09:22:52 PM  
to do this in ff you need to click off js in options and disable the javas you find under the plugins part, too.
 
2013-01-11 09:24:06 PM  
I just threw my PC down the garbage disposal. Was that the correct course of action?
 
2013-01-11 09:24:59 PM  
HA! HA! I'm one step ahead, I'm using Chrome OS.
 
2013-01-11 09:25:14 PM  
The HTML assistant buttons require Javascript.
Turn on javascript (or enable it for Fark) for a better user experience.
 
2013-01-11 09:25:15 PM  
images1.wikia.nocookie.net

Shouldn't be too hard, he doesn't look like he's too quick on his feet.
 
2013-01-11 09:25:46 PM  

DownDaRiver: MrEricSir: DownDaRiver: When I turn off Java I get this message from Fark
"Please turn on JavaScript for a better user experience"
No frickin security threat or the pissin DHS is going to keep me from having a better Farking user experience!

/also the nifty little reply button thingy don't work either

Um... since when did DHS say anything about disabling Javascript?

Uh...it was supposed to be sorta a joke


/jackass


The thing about jokes is they have to be funny.
 
2013-01-11 09:27:21 PM  

Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: I just threw my PC down the garbage disposal. Was that the correct course of action?


Did you microwave it first? The heat kills all the viruses.
 
2013-01-11 09:27:26 PM  
What Larry Ellison's yacht, running Java, may look like.
i79.photobucket.com
 
2013-01-11 09:29:25 PM  

TEG24601: You only need to disable the browser Plugin, and not run software that you don't know and trust.


Haha ... good one....  I got a real chuckle over that ...
 
2013-01-11 09:34:58 PM  

tzzhc4: [kasei.us image 300x228]

Blackwatch plaid level threat?


upload.wikimedia.org

Worse
 
2013-01-11 09:35:44 PM  
DHS, another impotent government agency that can't prove they have ever stopped anything since its all secret.
 
2013-01-11 09:42:12 PM  
Dear God! The terrorists are going after the PR0N!!! O_O
 
2013-01-11 09:43:09 PM  
Wait - so, half the posters in this thread are ranting about the DHS because they indicated that Java is unsafe and exploitable? Really?
 
2013-01-11 09:45:19 PM  

MrEricSir: Who the hell is using Java applets anymore? What is this, 1996?


NASA would like to have a word with you.
 
2013-01-11 09:52:37 PM  

phamwaa: MrEricSir: Who the hell is using Java applets anymore? What is this, 1996?

NASA would like to have a word with you.


Having (unfortunately) worked at NASA in the past, I can assure you it's not 1996 there so much as it's 1969.
 
2013-01-11 09:53:52 PM  

MrEricSir: DownDaRiver: MrEricSir: DownDaRiver:

Uh...it was supposed to be sorta a joke


/jackass

The thing about jokes is they have to be funny.


You are absolutly right
Tell ya what, next time I think I have a joke, I'll send it off to you first. If it meets your approval I will then consider using it. Is that OK? I wouldn't want to do anythnig that would incure critcism from you.

/douche
 
2013-01-11 10:02:58 PM  
Should I block my Fark ads, too? They seem to s l o w the loading of pages. It might be a security risk, ya know?
 
2013-01-11 10:07:38 PM  

DownDaRiver: MrEricSir: DownDaRiver: MrEricSir: DownDaRiver:

Uh...it was supposed to be sorta a joke


/jackass

The thing about jokes is they have to be funny.

You are absolutly right
Tell ya what, next time I think I have a joke, I'll send it off to you first. If it meets your approval I will then consider using it. Is that OK? I wouldn't want to do anythnig that would incure critcism from you.

/douche


Are the half-assed insults intended to distract from your lack of understanding of humor? Or are you going for unintentional irony?
 
2013-01-11 10:16:08 PM  
Done in one.
 
2013-01-11 10:16:10 PM  
Java? Dangerous, unpatched exploit? Color me surprised...

I have had Java in the browser disabled via GP at work for months now.
 
2013-01-11 10:18:42 PM  

davidphogan: How do you disable a province in Indonesia?


-Xmx0M -Xms0M
 
2013-01-11 10:20:01 PM  
I unplugged my coffee machine.  Am I safe?
 
2013-01-11 10:21:04 PM  

Saberus Terras: Does this mean I can't play Minecraft?


You can always take your chances:

fc06.deviantart.net
 
2013-01-11 10:22:02 PM  

InternetSecurityGuard: I'd rather just disable the DHS instead.


Wave hello to the DHS agents watching you now because of that comment.
 
2013-01-11 10:25:17 PM  

MrEricSir: Who the hell is using Java applets anymore? What is this, 1996?


My guess is you don't work at any sort of tech field.

Jrun
Tomcat
Jetty
Jboss
GlassFish
WebSphere
iPlanet
WebLogic
etc

Pretty much any self contained portable software that runs on it's own web interface uses a java application server. Coldfusion / Railo / Blue Dragon webpages (cfm) and JSP pages are the big offenders, but there are other things as well.

Are you running an IBM, HP, or Dell server? Guess what, Open Manage, HP Integrated Lights-Out, HP SIM (and most Proliant Support Pack programs), and most other management/administration utilities are Java.

What's that you use IBM Tivoli for backup? Tivoli's backup storage manager client is Java base.
You use NetApp? Their management console is Java based
You use CommVault? Hey, what do ya know. More Java.
You hate Sharepoint so you use Alfresco? That's Java too.
Use BMC Remedy for a ticketing system for your help desk? That's built on Java.
Use Cherwell... I've got bad news for you.

Java isn't quite as dead as you think it is.
 
2013-01-11 10:34:12 PM  
I don't have to worry about this sort of thing. I have PC Matic. It keeps me protected.

/and makes my internet speeds faster
 
Displayed 50 of 176 comments


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Newest | Show all


View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter






In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report