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(Vanity Fair)   In addition to determining if your boyfriend/husband is an asshole, Vanity Fair now has a quiz to help you decided whether or not you have the flu   (vanityfair.com ) divider line
    More: Silly, Vanity Fair, flu  
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1928 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Jan 2013 at 9:02 AM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



14 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-01-11 09:05:27 AM  
Wow... I'm kinda pissed off at VF right now...

They're making it seem like one of the worst flu seasons in recent history is really just an excuse for people to take off work.

I'm picturing an editor making this quiz... one who is annoyed by the fact that all his/her employees have called in sick. Meanwhile, the employees have never seen things of that color or shape being coughed up from their lungs...
 
2013-01-11 09:05:48 AM  
I think subby is thinking of Cosmopolitan. Vanity Fair actually has some good reporting/articles.
 
2013-01-11 09:06:33 AM  
1. Are you pooping?

2. Are you puking?

3. Are you roasting?

If the answers to all three questions is "I want to die. Kill me now.", then you probably have the flu.
 
2013-01-11 09:07:52 AM  
This sounds like it is written by a very pissed off republican
 
2013-01-11 09:12:26 AM  
I have decided because I am the decideder!
 
2013-01-11 09:14:19 AM  

drongozone: I think subby is thinking of Cosmopolitan. Vanity Fair actually has some good reporting/articles.

 
2013-01-11 09:34:25 AM  
I dunno, is there a good video game release today? I may have the flu.
 
2013-01-11 10:27:56 AM  
Normally I would insert a tasteless, sexist joke, but I don't think I have to do so here. Thank you Vanity Fair. You've actually made my life easier...if only four ad long as it took to wow this post...which I wouldn't be doing I'd you hadn't written that quiz.

DAMN YOU, VANITY FAIR!
 
2013-01-11 10:29:33 AM  

joestoes: Normally I would insert a tasteless, sexist joke, but I don't think I have to do so here. Thank you Vanity Fair. You've actually made my life easier...if only four ad long as it took to wow this post...which I wouldn't be doing I'd you hadn't written that quiz.

DAMN YOU, VANITY FAIR!


*for
*as
*as
*write

Stupid Swype. I admit failure.
 
2013-01-11 10:43:59 AM  
I'm so sick of people not knowing what the flu is. It is a respiratory illness not a gastrointestinal illness. If you're shiatting or puking you do not have the flu(you have a tummy bug). If you spike a fever, very sore throat/cough, chills and extreme fatigue, then congratulations you're a winner and you have the flu. Low grade fever,snotty and/or mild cough; that's a cold.You have been schooled.
 
2013-01-11 11:55:53 AM  

Boudica's War Tampon: 1. Are you pooping?

2. Are you puking?

3. Are you roasting?

If the answers to all three questions is "I want to die. Kill me now.", then you probably have the flu.


Stomach flu != influenza
 
2013-01-11 12:06:19 PM  

Skirl Hutsenreiter: Boudica's War Tampon: 1. Are you pooping?

2. Are you puking?

3. Are you roasting?

If the answers to all three questions is "I want to die. Kill me now.", then you probably have the flu.

Stomach flu != influenza


Quoted from the CDC:

Influenza Symptoms

Influenza (also known as the flu) is a contagious respiratory illness caused by flu viruses. It can cause mild to severe illness, and at times can lead to death. The flu is different from a cold. The flu usually comes on suddenly. People who have the flu often feel some or all of these symptoms:

Fever* or feeling feverish/chills
Cough
Sore throat
Runny or stuffy nose
Muscle or body aches
Headaches
Fatigue (tiredness)
Some people may have vomiting and diarrhea, though this is more common in children than adults.

I guess I picked the wrong day to joke about flu symptoms. Even if my humor was reality-based.
 
2013-01-11 12:31:01 PM  
Oops. Since I'm distributing factual material from the CDC, I left off this little gem:

* It's important to note that not everyone with flu will have a fever.
 
2013-01-11 11:43:07 PM  

Boudica's War Tampon: Oops. Since I'm distributing factual material from the CDC, I left off this little gem:

* It's important to note that not everyone with flu will have a fever.


This.

I have a sneaking feeling that I might have gotten the latest iteration of...well, I've been very, very hesitant to call it ManBirdPig Flu 2.0, except I've had most of the symptoms except the usual 100+ degree fever I get with Actual Honest-To-Porky Flu (and pretty much the ONLY stuff I EVER have run fevers that high on involves flu; with other cruds including confirmed bacterial bronchitis I RARELY ever go past even 99.0). In addition, it's generally been very rare I get true flu (up until the past two years, anyways)--I'll get every other goddamn upper respiratory plague known to man, but not proper flu (I expect this is because I either got the flu a lot as a kid and got largely immune until the new ManBirdPig Flu stuff started coming out, or because that's the one viral plague my body actually knows how to FIGHT properly.)

If this stuff isn't making folks run fevers, it might be flu. For now, I'm chalking down what I'm slowly (ever...so...slowly) recovering from as some Unidentified Child-Transmitted Crud. (And no, folks aren't kidding about the "wow, I never realised something that shape and that colour could come out of my bronchial tubes in inconvenient quart-sized amounts at a time" with this stuff, either. Yes, there's a reason that my doc had me on pretty much every form of antiasthmatic steroid known to man including (and this is a first for me) an actual prednisone shot in the office. O_o)
 
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