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(Slate)   Why do rich and famous women always seem to sunbathe topless? Short answer: because they can. Long answer... is actually pretty interesting and worth a read   (slate.com) divider line 140
    More: Interesting, Explainer, birds and the bees, University of South Alabama, Southern India, French Riviera, Cole Porter, Frenchmen, Princess Di  
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28458 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Jan 2013 at 9:29 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-01-10 10:02:42 AM  

Telos: riverwalk barfly: If you have never been to a clothing optional beach, do yourself a favor and do it. I mean do it full monty. then watch as the most hideous woman sits topless and some man will make his move. Men are pigs. me included. titties are like bacon.

So... titties are made from men?


metaphorically speaking. yes.
 
2013-01-10 10:04:21 AM  

Mark Ratner: [www.celebgossipz.com image 450x530]
donatella versace
/rich and famous
//now you people can stop complaining


Well I had to check out the uncensored pics. It's like that guy in Robocop and Senator Kelly had a baby and then broiled it.
 
2013-01-10 10:04:39 AM  
maybe because the rich ladies go to fancy or private beaches where they won't be accosted by douchebags everytime they take off their tops. i guess that was almost in the article (though, it also mentioned that poor people take off their tops around the douchebags).
 
2013-01-10 10:05:13 AM  

AbbeySomeone: SirDigbyChickenCaesar: The Jami Turman Fan Club: Why would queens do that?

They are always showing off their firm chests with tight shirts to attract eligible men...wait, which queens are we talking about?

The queens we use would excite you?


What are you using the queens for?
 
2013-01-10 10:06:23 AM  
disappointing.
 
2013-01-10 10:06:34 AM  

Stone Meadow: [my2wheels.com image 392x46]


+1 on that one.
 
2013-01-10 10:07:43 AM  

riverwalk barfly: Telos: riverwalk barfly: If you have never been to a clothing optional beach, do yourself a favor and do it. I mean do it full monty. then watch as the most hideous woman sits topless and some man will make his move. Men are pigs. me included. titties are like bacon.

So... titties are made from men?

metaphorically speaking. yes.


zoice.com

Back off ladies, he's mine!
/forget which Fark party this was taken at
 
2013-01-10 10:09:53 AM  

Another Pretentious Nickname: They didn't actually answer the question. They just gave a history of when women in various social classes did and didn't go topless.


Yeah, it was pretty lame. I'm going to go with variations on "I'm rich as fark and I do what I want."

-I'm rich as fark and that means I have the power to get naked outside without being seen by the public. (It's embarrassing when that fails.)
-I'm rich as fark and clothes at a beach are for poor people, like vaginal sex.
-My husband's rich as fark and he wants to see some titties
-I'm rich as fark and clothes are just so last season
 
2013-01-10 10:10:37 AM  

T-Servo: riverwalk barfly: Telos: riverwalk barfly: If you have never been to a clothing optional beach, do yourself a favor and do it. I mean do it full monty. then watch as the most hideous woman sits topless and some man will make his move. Men are pigs. me included. titties are like bacon.

So... titties are made from men?

metaphorically speaking. yes.

[zoice.com image 604x453]

Back off ladies, he's mine!
/forget which Fark party this was taken at


What has been seen cannot be unseen.
 
2013-01-10 10:10:45 AM  
Found picture of Russian princess naked on beach. (SFW)
 
2013-01-10 10:12:59 AM  
Regarding the Versace pic above, does a person have to actively not pick up anything over a pound for a long period of time to get that kind of lack of muscle?
 
2013-01-10 10:14:15 AM  

JustMatt: Regarding the Versace pic above, does a person have to actively not pick up anything over a pound for a long period of time to get that kind of lack of muscle?


It's Baron Harkonnen's grandmother.
 
2013-01-10 10:16:17 AM  
I'm not very witty, so I'll just go with a basic BIE? EIP.

Liked the Road Runner line, though.
 
2013-01-10 10:17:52 AM  

dgames: Words, words, words. Pics?


I'll help.

The No-Bra Tumblr (PNSFW)
 
2013-01-10 10:18:12 AM  

REO-Weedwagon: Found picture of Russian princess naked on beach. (SFW)


Saw the URL. Not clicking.
 
2013-01-10 10:18:29 AM  

REO-Weedwagon: Found picture of Russian princess naked on beach. (SFW)


encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com
 
2013-01-10 10:18:38 AM  
JustMatt


Regarding the Versace pic above, does a person have to actively not pick up anything over a pound for a long period of time to get that kind of lack of muscle?



You should see her vagina muscles - she has definitely been lifting some weights down there!
 
2013-01-10 10:19:14 AM  

REO-Weedwagon: Found picture of Russian princess naked on beach. (SFW)


http://www.herdaily.com/blogimg/Entertainment/fat/Gerard Depardieu.jpg

Not clicking.
0/10 for execution
 
2013-01-10 10:19:20 AM  

ZAZ: I would rather have an answer to when did humans discover that sex made babies.


According to "Sex At Dawn" primitive cultures had interesting ideas around this, like partible paternity: all of the men mom scrod during pregnancy were fathers of the baby, and all contributed to the baby's makeup.

According to Cracked (the best-researched dick jokes on the Internet) there was at least one culture who never quite got around to figuring out the connection (they had crappy fertility, so few sex acts resulted in pregnancies, so they came up with alternative theories).
 
2013-01-10 10:30:04 AM  
That was a very long article to explain something very simple. I didn't read the entire thing. I stopped around the point of the French Riveria.

Did they happen to mention that in Europe, generally, people aren't so f'n consumed with naked bewbs? They have advertisements in the newspapers with topless women. I really think this country (and the entire middle east) are the only ones that have a hang up about it.
 
2013-01-10 10:33:33 AM  
More to the question is why we get so upset when we see women's nipples, but not men's. I mean, it's not like it's secret. We both have them.
 
2013-01-10 10:35:50 AM  
I read that whole thing as "Status Symbol"

/Will be mentioning this to my more reserved white trash girlfriends.
//"Its what the Royals like Kate Middleton are doing!"
/// Boobiiiesss!!!! :-D
 
2013-01-10 10:36:20 AM  
Because of jerks like me.

Oh. Why can women sunbath topless. Never mind.
 
2013-01-10 10:38:51 AM  

dj_spanmaster: dgames: Words, words, words. Pics?

I'll help.

The No-Bra Tumblr (PNSFW)


Well, looks like I'm not getting a damned thing done at work today.

*walks over and closes office door*

/fap
 
2013-01-10 10:39:17 AM  

durbnpoisn: I really think this country (and the entire middle east) are the only ones that have a hang up about it.


That's because Jesus loves you.
 
2013-01-10 10:40:06 AM  

karnal: JustMatt


Regarding the Versace pic above, does a person have to actively not pick up anything over a pound for a long period of time to get that kind of lack of muscle?


You should see her vagina muscles - she has definitely been lifting some weights down there!



i171.photobucket.com
 
2013-01-10 10:40:22 AM  
Except for the "no bra" link, this thread is a flaming buttplug
 
2013-01-10 10:41:48 AM  
img22.fansshare.com
So close . . . so close . . .
 
2013-01-10 10:41:49 AM  
Back before she became a facelift addict and ended up looking like The Joker's great gramma, the Duchess of Alba possessed a legendary beauty that included an impressive pair of funbags. NSFW.
 
2013-01-10 10:44:20 AM  
I'll help...

acidcow.com
 
2013-01-10 10:44:35 AM  

Gaseous Anomaly: ZAZ: I would rather have an answer to when did humans discover that sex made babies.

According to "Sex At Dawn" primitive cultures had interesting ideas around this, like partible paternity: all of the men mom scrod during pregnancy were fathers of the baby, and all contributed to the baby's makeup.

According to Cracked (the best-researched dick jokes on the Internet) there was at least one culture who never quite got around to figuring out the connection (they had crappy fertility, so few sex acts resulted in pregnancies, so they came up with alternative theories).


Aforementioned piece of crack.

Personally, I'd like to know the answer to the other question: how long could a woman survive by drinking her own breast milk.
 
2013-01-10 10:45:12 AM  
Not helping...

www.celebgossipz.com
 
2013-01-10 10:45:20 AM  
OK, Duchess of Alba take 2. NSFW
 
2013-01-10 10:47:32 AM  
encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com
 
2013-01-10 10:49:31 AM  

blatz514: Not helping...

[www.celebgossipz.com image 450x333]


NSFW Link
 
2013-01-10 10:50:11 AM  

AbbeySomeone: SirDigbyChickenCaesar: The Jami Turman Fan Club: Why would queens do that?

They are always showing off their firm chests with tight shirts to attract eligible men...wait, which queens are we talking about?

The queens we use would excite you?


+eleventy.

/"I get my kicks above the waistline, sunshine" seems thoroughly appropriate here.
 
2013-01-10 10:52:21 AM  
Actually, that was interesting.
 
2013-01-10 10:52:51 AM  

MCStymie: AbbeySomeone: SirDigbyChickenCaesar: The Jami Turman Fan Club: Why would queens do that?

They are always showing off their firm chests with tight shirts to attract eligible men...wait, which queens are we talking about?

The queens we use would excite you?

+eleventy.

/"I get my kicks above the waistline, sunshine" seems thoroughly appropriate here.


Oh NOW I get it...
 
2013-01-10 10:54:50 AM  

ZAZ: I would rather have an answer to when did humans discover that sex made babies.


Wait a minute...sex makes BABIES!?!
 
2013-01-10 10:54:51 AM  

Mark Ratner: [www.celebgossipz.com image 450x530]
donatella versace
/rich and famous
//now you people can stop complaining


I'm going to laugh all day about this.
 
2013-01-10 10:57:19 AM  

H31N0US: durbnpoisn: I really think this country (and the entire middle east) are the only ones that have a hang up about it.

That's because Jesus loves you.


Then why doesn't he return my calls?
 
2013-01-10 10:57:44 AM  

abhorrent1: blatz514: Not helping...

[www.celebgossipz.com image 450x333]

NSFW Link


Sorta helping.
 
2013-01-10 10:59:52 AM  

fruitloop: You should see her vagina muscles - she has definitely been lifting some weights down there!


theinfosphere.org
 
2013-01-10 11:07:34 AM  
Shouldn't the question be, "Why do so many people put on opaque garments to sunbathe?" I don't have the ability to tan myself, but if I could, I wouldn't be half-assed about the sunbathing thing.
 
2013-01-10 11:08:08 AM  
What would you do if you found a necklace that would grant you power to command 50 percent of the population to do what you wanted instead of what they would normally want to do?

An attractive woman has that power every single day. Some decide to use it before they lose it, because power is exciting and fun and profitable.
 
2013-01-10 11:09:41 AM  
I should add that approximately 12 percent of all of the laws on planet Earth are designed to attempt to remove this power from the hands of young women and artificially place that power in the hands of old men.

It's never really fully worked.
 
2013-01-10 11:16:55 AM  
Yeah, Snookie and the rest of that crowd are making it so the rich and famous are beginning to sport pale, untanned skin.

Evidence
 
2013-01-10 11:18:43 AM  
mathildasanthropologyblog.files.wordpress.com
www.modeknit.com
/will take hammer for ancient art
 
2013-01-10 11:19:37 AM  

stevetherobot: JonnyG: Um, where the hell are the dozens of pictures I expected by now? We're like 5 posts in!

dgames: Words, words, words. Pics?

karnal: there weren't enough pictures for me to get through the entire article

[www.historytoday.com image 600x731]

There you go.


Wonder if there used to be woodcut artists who'd do a quick 'sketch' (as it were) of one...
Sorta like those artists that you find at various venues that'll do a quick $25 pastel caricature while-you-wait...
"Check out "Chippin' Charlie" over by the Haymarket...he did a really good woodcut of my cousin Anne last week.  Only took him 3 hours."
 
2013-01-10 11:24:30 AM  

fireclown: fruitloop: You should see her vagina muscles - she has definitely been lifting some weights down there!

[theinfosphere.org image 706x540]


I discovered that it's possible for a woman's kegels to be too strong. If she clenches on an out-stroke and stays clenched, you're not getting back in. If she then has a tendency to clench hard when she's really enjoying herself...well, let's just say that I'm glad I never sustained an injury.
 
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