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(WKYC Cleveland)   The stripper who fell 15 feet while attempting a lap dance stunt has died. All of you who made fun of her may now feel badly   (wkyc.com ) divider line
    More: Followup, MetroHealth Medical Center  
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13918 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Jan 2013 at 3:08 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-01-09 03:29:31 PM  
Seriously.

Are there no pics of this chick available?
 
2013-01-09 03:29:42 PM  
Did the guy finish?
 
2013-01-09 03:31:01 PM  
If only there were an armed patron there to prevent this tragedy.
 
2013-01-09 03:31:47 PM  

kronicfeld: Badly is an adverb. So to say you feel badly would be saying that the mechanism which allows you to feel is broken.


Actually, I don't feel that bad about it.
So if subby thinks I should feel morose, then I guess I do feel badly
 
2013-01-09 03:32:37 PM  
What could she have been doing that caused her to fall over the rail? I figure the strippers usually keep their center of gravity, as it were, right on or close to the customer's center of gravity. Was there a Mafia! stripper act going on? Only time they don't have their center of gravity on mine during a lapdance is when they're simulating a BJ, or rubbing their tits in my face.

/years and years ago
//dive of a strip club, where most of the "dancers" went to die, the rest were locals with mooches/pimps for boyfriends
///couple cute ones, but the formaldehyde bath to clean them up wouldn't leave much
 
2013-01-09 03:34:46 PM  

propasaurus: Why was she doing a lap dance on a balcony?


i1.cpcache.com
 
2013-01-09 03:35:04 PM  

Minor_Inconvenience: Sofa King Smart: kronicfeld: Badly is an adverb. So to say you feel badly would be saying that the mechanism which allows you to feel is broken.

What, farkhead? Who taught you grammar? Badly's an adverb. Get out. Vanish.

/don't quit your gay job.

Damnit.


that movie has so many good lines in it... (oh I forgot to tell you the cowboy rode a blue horse...)
 
2013-01-09 03:35:24 PM  
Sorry to see her split
 
2013-01-09 03:35:33 PM  

kronicfeld: Badly is an adverb. So to say you feel badly would be saying that the mechanism which allows you to feel is broken.


Hmmm. I guess you are right. Most people underuse adverbs. I wonder how the phrase "feel badly" became an instance where an adverb is frequently used incorrectly.
 
2013-01-09 03:35:43 PM  

propasaurus: Why was she doing a lap dance on a balcony?


Having been to this club before Mrs. 6502 entered the environment, I can speak to this. There's the main floor downstairs, and upstairs, there's a balcony area where one can chill, watch the main stage, or get a more private dance. I would presume that she was performing a private dance upstairs and launched herself over the railing.
 
2013-01-09 03:36:08 PM  
localtvwjw.files.wordpress.com

RIP clumsy stripper girl.
 
2013-01-09 03:36:23 PM  

kronicfeld: Badly is an adverb. So to say you feel badly would be saying that the mechanism which allows you to feel is broken.


twscritic.files.wordpress.com
/hot
//very very hot
 
2013-01-09 03:36:57 PM  
supportyourlocalgunfighter.com

Should have stuck to her day job... being ogled by middle aged guys in the restaurant pretending to like the chicken wings.
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2013-01-09 03:37:53 PM  
If only there were an armed patron there to prevent this tragedy.

It could be like skeet shooting. Pull! Blam! Sorry, Bill, you just winged her. Only torso hits score.
 
2013-01-09 03:37:55 PM  

devilskware: She died doing what she loved.


Falling 15 feet off a balcony?
 
2013-01-09 03:38:48 PM  
supportyourlocalgunfighter.com

/hot unlike her corpse
 
2013-01-09 03:39:26 PM  

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: devilskware: She died doing what she loved.

Falling 15 feet off a balcony?


Diving.
 
2013-01-09 03:39:43 PM  
media.heavy.com

If only those air bags had deployed.
 
2013-01-09 03:40:45 PM  
I'd throw it off a 15 foot balcony! Twice.

supportyourlocalgunfighter.com

/Am I doing it right?
 
2013-01-09 03:41:04 PM  
supportyourlocalgunfighter.com

So, the result when an angry god hits it is that a stripper falls 15 feet?
 
2013-01-09 03:41:19 PM  
I'm going to take the approach as "the old man in the shack" from "Hitchhiker's Guide"...

How can I feel bad, when I don't have any proof she even existed?
 
2013-01-09 03:46:51 PM  
Lawsuit against the punter in 3...2...1...
 
2013-01-09 03:48:08 PM  

Richard Johnson: Darwin wins again.


"Death by misadventure" doesn't seem to be used on coroner's reports these days.
 
2013-01-09 03:48:28 PM  
FTA: "We know that she's in God's hands"

I though Ohio had no-touch laws...

-and-

"Calls to the club went unanswered Wednesday morning."

wait til later in the day when calling a titty bar

/yeah, im a jerk
 
2013-01-09 03:48:47 PM  
Here is where I would wish they would list the real cause of death in obituaries, we will get the obilgatory, "Lauren passed away this morning from injuries received in an accident January 2d."
 
2013-01-09 03:49:56 PM  

6502programmer: propasaurus: Why was she doing a lap dance on a balcony?

Having been to this club before Mrs. 6502 entered the environment, I can speak to this. There's the main floor downstairs, and upstairs, there's a balcony area where one can chill, watch the main stage, or get a more private dance. I would presume that she was performing a private dance upstairs and launched herself over the railing.


Just doesn't seem like it would be more 'private' if it's a balcony overlooking the main floor. I would prefer-- I mean, I would guess someone would prefer-- to get a lap dance in a dark private room.
And anyway, the picture in TFA made it seem like it was an outdoor balcony, which really doesn't make sense.
 
2013-01-09 03:52:23 PM  
I'm sure she's sliding down Saint Peter's Pole as we speak.

/or, she's in Hell, where fiery daemons poke her soul, and the agonies of the damned never cease.
//either way, she'll be missed.
 
2013-01-09 03:53:35 PM  
Were the hell is this place located?  By a coal mine??

www.wkyc.com
 
2013-01-09 03:54:28 PM  

2xcited: Here is where I would wish they would list the real cause of death in obituaries, we will get the obilgatory, "Lauren passed away this morning from injuries received in an accident January 2d."


Rare but awesome is the family willing to be proud of the seedy side of someone's life, and rarer still is the newspaper willing to print it.

/Skeletons are so much more awesome dancing in public than in the closet.
 
2013-01-09 03:57:09 PM  
In ten years they will make a biopic about her.  The premise will be the forbidden strip move that only so and so played by Demi Moore, completed in competition back in 1982.  Demi will come out of retirement to train the new talent and then...like a bullrider who got the wrong bull at the wrong time, the new perky talent will try to prove herself too early...and get bucked right over the edge.  But in the end, all the kind hearted strippers hold a fundraiser to save the bar from being closed.

I think Lindsay Lohan might play the chalk outline.
 
2013-01-09 03:57:21 PM  
Does the mortuary make her up all whorish and with glitter ? Because she would have wanted it that way.
 
2013-01-09 03:58:18 PM  
At least she got out of Cleveland
 
2013-01-09 03:59:09 PM  

blatz514: Were the hell is this place located?  By a coal mine??

[www.wkyc.com image 640x360]


There's a Carnivale reference here somewhere.
 
2013-01-09 04:01:10 PM  

Elegy: /that poor, poor customer


I disagree. He will always have the best drinking story when his friends try to one up each other.
 
2013-01-09 04:01:34 PM  

theesir: [supportyourlocalgunfighter.com image 305x524]
Should have stuck to her day job... being ogled by middle aged guys in the restaurant pretending to like the chicken wings.


Good lord, what a depressing existence. Hooters and a strip club. She probably jumped.
 
2013-01-09 04:01:43 PM  

Dejah: All the dancers will only go halfway up the pole today out of respect.


Damn. That's beautiful.

You will eleventy Internets.
 
2013-01-09 04:02:15 PM  
"15 feet"? That's one tall... "lap" she was dancing on.

/dnrta
 
2013-01-09 04:03:54 PM  
The case is being investigated by Officer Naughty. (my apologies to Ms. Block, she looks kinda cute)

i174.photobucket.com
 
2013-01-09 04:04:55 PM  

probesport: A lap dance  The sex is so much better when the stripper is dying


Fixed
 
2013-01-09 04:05:25 PM  

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: [localtvwjw.files.wordpress.com image 402x226]

RIP clumsy stripper girl.


localtvwjw.files.wordpress.com

She looks like Kendra.

/shudders
 
2013-01-09 04:05:36 PM  
Show some respect, she did die in the line of booty after all.
 
2013-01-09 04:05:38 PM  

MorePeasPlease: I always thought it would be interesting if we suddenly all got little slips of paper that told us the place and manner of our death.

Would you look?
Imagine if these folks had read theirs ... would they have believed them?

Norway-eaten by polar bear.

or

Maryland-asphyxiation in manure pit

or

Disneyland-Big Thunder Railroad, blunt force trauma.


A parachute not opening... that's a way to die. Getting caught in the gears of a combine... having your nuts bit off by a Laplander, that's the way I wanna go!
 
2013-01-09 04:06:22 PM  

Evil Mackerel: Show some respect, she did die in the line of booty after fall.


FTFM
 
2013-01-09 04:11:39 PM  
i48.tinypic.com
 
2013-01-09 04:13:53 PM  
She was an organ donor, so she has that going for her now.
 
2013-01-09 04:15:51 PM  
Article doesn't mention a kid. So I'll take that back.
But I'm standing by that she knew the risks going in and that she should have practiced more.

/feels bad for her and family though. 22 is too young.
 
2013-01-09 04:17:31 PM  

MythDragon: A parachute not opening... that's a way to die. Getting caught in the gears of a combine... having your nuts bit off by a Laplander, that's the way I wanna go!


A friend of mine's old man was a truck driver back in the good ol days when speed a necessity for truck drivers, and I'm not talking about going fast. He was your typical hard living, hard drinking good old boy. We were playing poker one night and question of how the best way to go would be. He said he wanted to be drunk, high and farking a hooker doggy style and have his heart explode out of his chest when he nuts and cover the hookers back in blood.
 
2013-01-09 04:18:45 PM  
kronicfeld:
Badly is an adverb. So to say you feel badly would be saying that the mechanism which allows you to feel is broken.

... or perhaps feeling with little skill. The main point is, however, that you should NOT be feeling up dead strippers in the first place.
 
2013-01-09 04:19:21 PM  

media.philly.com



NightOwl2255: A friend of mine's old man was a truck driver back in the good ol days when speed a necessity for truck drivers, and I'm not talking about going fast. He was your typical hard living, hard drinking good old boy. We were playing poker one night and question of how the best way to go would be. He said he wanted to be drunk, high and farking a hooker doggy style and have his heart explode out of his chest when he nuts and cover the hookers back in blood.


-Mark Twain

 
2013-01-09 04:19:30 PM  
Is there a link to the original FARK thread? I can't brain today.
 
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