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(NESN)   AJ McCarron's life expectancy dramatically shortens after he tells Darnell Dockett to back off from his girlfriend   (nesn.com) divider line 54
    More: Amusing, Darnell Dockett, AJ McCarron, McCarron, BCS National Championship Game, Nationals, Brent Musburger, Aaron Murray, Arizona Cardinals  
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2447 clicks; posted to Sports » on 09 Jan 2013 at 9:34 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-01-09 09:38:23 AM
AJ McCarron uses the word "homie". Lame white guy alert.

Who the hell is Darnell Dockett?
 
2013-01-09 09:38:44 AM
wtf is a wingstop? wtf did I just read.. some of that was english I think
 
2013-01-09 09:40:57 AM

WhiskeySticks: AJ McCarron uses the word "homie". Lame white guy alert.

Who the hell is Darnell Dockett?


sitracking.files.wordpress.com

That is a Dockett. There is no way in hell I would call him "homie".
 
2013-01-09 09:43:09 AM
Who is this man Dockett? He claims to play professional football, but I knew he was lying when he claimed to play a defensive position for the Arizona Cardinals.
 
2013-01-09 09:44:54 AM
She's not the brightest tool in the shed:
pbs.twimg.com
 
2013-01-09 09:48:44 AM

WTF Indeed: She's not the brightest tool in the shed:
[pbs.twimg.com image 640x960]


Haha -- she sure showed him.
 
2013-01-09 10:01:07 AM

jankyboy: WTF Indeed: She's not the brightest tool in the shed:
[pbs.twimg.com image 640x960]

Haha -- she sure showed him.


She showed me.  What she looks like going down on a guy.
 
2013-01-09 10:06:04 AM

jankyboy: WTF Indeed: She's not the brightest tool in the shed:
[pbs.twimg.com image 640x960]

Haha -- she sure showed him.


She's too young to understand The Streisand Effect.
 
2013-01-09 10:07:54 AM
Men really do this sort of macho posturing bullshiat in real life?  Can't Miss Webb take care of herself?  Being a beauty queen, you'd think she would be very proficient in rejecting hopeful suitors.
 
2013-01-09 10:11:07 AM
i258.photobucket.com
 
2013-01-09 10:11:53 AM
The worst thing that could have happened to AJ McCarron was to have his GF become well known. Sure, he's a bigshot because he's the QB at Alabama, but she'll be beautiful a lot longer than he'll be a quarterback.
 
2013-01-09 10:18:56 AM

Yanks_RSJ: but she'll be beautiful a lot longer than he'll be a quarterback.


Ehh, I don't know..seems like boobs and QB skills decline at about the same rate... add in the fact that he will probably be a clipboard holder (backup) and he may spend some years in the NFL.
 
2013-01-09 10:20:20 AM
ok, i'm not usual one to biatch about this, but i think we've had enough stories about this stupidity. yeah, she's farkable. yeah, the announcers drooled over her. year, dockett offered her a night of wings and strip clubs (way to woo the ladies, dd). yeah, there's a photo of her sucking an invisible dick. but come on can we please move on the next stupid worthless non-story already?

/also, aj will be fine. it's not like he told rae carruth or oj to back off.
 
2013-01-09 10:23:21 AM

moefuggenbrew: Yanks_RSJ: but she'll be beautiful a lot longer than he'll be a quarterback.

Ehh, I don't know..seems like boobs and QB skills decline at about the same rate... add in the fact that he will probably be a clipboard holder (backup) and he may spend some years in the NFL.


She went from a virtual unknown on Monday to the Today Show this morning. She doesn't need to be the Bama QBs girlfriend anymore.
 
2013-01-09 10:25:05 AM

EyeballKid: Who is this man Dockett? He claims to play professional football, but I knew he was lying when he claimed to play a defensive position for the Arizona Cardinals.


You are aware that the cardinals have one of the leagues better defenses, no?
 
2013-01-09 10:28:20 AM
an article reporting on farking tweets. fark me i hate twitter.
 
2013-01-09 10:36:52 AM
What language was all that in, Luther? Didn't understand a word.
 
2013-01-09 10:40:51 AM

MyRandomName: EyeballKid: Who is this man Dockett? He claims to play professional football, but I knew he was lying when he claimed to play a defensive position for the Arizona Cardinals.

You are aware that the cardinals have one of the leagues better defenses, no?


17th by points, 12th by total yards. Seems pretty mediocre to me.
 
2013-01-09 10:41:06 AM
Lucky for McCarron that he'll never be more than a clipboard holder in the NFL so he won't have to worry about seeing Dockett on the field.
 
2013-01-09 10:44:18 AM
McCarron needs to hire Greg Jones as his bodyguard. After all Greg did knock DD the &$$& out as a freshman at FSU.
 
2013-01-09 10:44:34 AM
That about cuts it....
 
2013-01-09 10:45:33 AM

flak attack: 17th by points, 12th by total yards. Seems pretty mediocre to me.


Ah, you still use Cro-Magnon levels of measuring sticks for effectiveness in the NFL. Try 6th in DVOA. 6th in CHFF's Defensive Hog Index.
 
2013-01-09 10:50:50 AM

flak attack: MyRandomName: EyeballKid: Who is this man Dockett? He claims to play professional football, but I knew he was lying when he claimed to play a defensive position for the Arizona Cardinals.

You are aware that the cardinals have one of the leagues better defenses, no?

17th by points, 12th by total yards. Seems pretty mediocre to me.


If your offense is going 3 and out (or less) every single drive, you wear down by the 4th quarter and give up more points.  It is highly likely that defense is being sabotaged by a historically inept offense.  http://espn.go.com/nfl/statistics/team/_/stat/total/seasontype/2

Last in total offense.  So there you go.  If they got a better offense, I'd wager they have top 10 talent.  Adrian Wilson, Patrick Peterson, Dockett, ect.  Lots of talent on that side of the ball.
 
2013-01-09 10:51:45 AM

IAmRight: flak attack: 17th by points, 12th by total yards. Seems pretty mediocre to me.

Ah, you still use Cro-Magnon levels of measuring sticks for effectiveness in the NFL. Try 6th in DVOA. 6th in CHFF's Defensive Hog Index.


And first in Unicorn pancakes!

/Sorry, Broncos.
 
2013-01-09 10:54:51 AM

IAmRight: flak attack: 17th by points, 12th by total yards. Seems pretty mediocre to me.

Ah, you still use Cro-Magnon levels of measuring sticks for effectiveness in the NFL. Try 6th in DVOA. 6th in CHFF's Defensive Hog Index.


Arizona's offense is last in the league by that metric, too.
 
2013-01-09 10:57:07 AM

Tell Me How My Blog Tastes: Arizona's offense is last in the league by that metric, too.


Arizona's offense is the worst in virtually everything.
 
2013-01-09 10:59:26 AM

OfficeLife: McCarron needs to hire Greg Jones as his bodyguard. After all Greg did knock DD the &$$& out as a freshman at FSU.


And, as an FSU grad who's always loved Greg and hated Dockett, this still brings a smile to my face.

Now, in all fairness, Greg Jones was really good at knocking people out. I think Dexter Reid may still have a Ridell emblem imprinted on his jaw.
 
2013-01-09 10:59:32 AM

Tell Me How My Blog Tastes: If your offense is going 3 and out (or less) every single drive, you wear down by the 4th quarter and give up more points. It is highly likely that defense is being sabotaged by a historically inept offense. http://espn.go.com/nfl/statistics/team/_/stat/total/seasontype/2

Last in total offense. So there you go. If they got a better offense, I'd wager they have top 10 talent. Adrian Wilson, Patrick Peterson, Dockett, ect. Lots of talent on that side of the ball.


IAmRight: Ah, you still use Cro-Magnon levels of measuring sticks for effectiveness in the NFL. Try 6th in DVOA. 6th in CHFF's Defensive Hog Index.


Rams 17 Cardinals 3
49ers 24 Cardinals 3
Packers 31 Cardinals 17
Rams 31 Cardinals 17
Seahawks 58 Cardinals 0
Bears 28 Cardinals 13
49ers 27 Cardinals 13

Yep, looks like a solid defensive powerhouse right there. Maybe the Tillman family would allow the Cardinals to prop Pat's corpse in formation, he could probably grab a few more tackles than they regularly would.
 
2013-01-09 11:06:38 AM

EyeballKid: Rams 17 Cardinals 3
49ers 24 Cardinals 3
Packers 31 Cardinals 17
Rams 31 Cardinals 17
Seahawks 58 Cardinals 0
Bears 28 Cardinals 13
49ers 27 Cardinals 13


17 points would be among the best defenses in the league, so that's a stupid example.
Rams defense scored 14 of those points on INT TDs - again, 17 is not a bad number of points to give up
8 turnovers. EIGHT! (also, another 14 defensive points)
14 points scored by the Bears defense as well. 14 points is not a bad number for the defense to give up.

The Packers and 49ers are two of the best teams in the NFL and were a problem for them.
 
2013-01-09 11:10:20 AM
Wait - she's Miss Alabama and her boyfriend is the qb for the football team?

Beard.
 
2013-01-09 11:13:08 AM

EyeballKid: Yep, looks like a solid defensive powerhouse right there.


It's almost as if having an offense that can rarely sustain drives and keep your defensive units rested, and also turns the ball over a lot and puts your defense in terrible positions may have an affect on your points allowed.
 
2013-01-09 11:19:25 AM

IAmRight: 17 points would be among the best defenses in the league, so that's a stupid example.
Rams defense scored 14 of those points on INT TDs - again, 17 is not a bad number of points to give up
8 turnovers. EIGHT! (also, another 14 defensive points)
14 points scored by the Bears defense as well. 14 points is not a bad number for the defense to give up.

The Packers and 49ers are two of the best teams in the NFL and were a problem for them.


Killer Cars: It's almost as if having an offense that can rarely sustain drives and keep your defensive units rested, and also turns the ball over a lot and puts your defense in terrible positions may have an affect on your points allowed.


Fine. Their defense is good. It must be what's kept them in the playoffs up to this point.
 
2013-01-09 11:21:06 AM

EyeballKid: Fine. Their defense is good. It must be what's kept them in the playoffs up to this point.


Talk about missing the point. Good God.
 
2013-01-09 11:24:20 AM

Killer Cars: It's almost as if having an offense that can rarely sustain drives and keep your defensive units rested, and also turns the ball over a lot and puts your defense in terrible positions may have an affect on your points allowed.


Or literally gives up 14 points/game on its own.
 
2013-01-09 11:25:21 AM
Leave it to fark to derail a hot girl thread into an argument about how good or bad the cardinals defense is.
 
2013-01-09 11:25:25 AM

EyeballKid: Fine. Their defense is good. It must be what's kept them in the playoffs up to this point.


We get it, you're a moron.

Next time just append that to the end of your initial foray into the thread, and we'll all save time.
 
2013-01-09 11:30:26 AM

Yanks_RSJ: EyeballKid: Fine. Their defense is good. It must be what's kept them in the playoffs up to this point.

Talk about missing the point. Good God.


Stunning, really. I mean, it was a pretty solid defense that was often put in bad situations by a historically shiatty offense. Nobody's saying that they're the '85 Bears, just that you need to look beyond the yards and points for context.
 
2013-01-09 11:35:16 AM

VvonderJesus: Leave it to fark to derail a hot girl thread into an argument about how good or bad the cardinals defense is.


Meh, you can find hot girls to look at anywhere. Somewhat-advanced football discussions? Not so much.
 
2013-01-09 12:37:38 PM

WTF Indeed: She's not the brightest tool in the shed:
[pbs.twimg.com image 640x960]


Not to go all studman, but does she look old to anyone else? Like MILF or TV anchor with a lot of makeup (and some touchup surgery), as opposed to college age?
 
2013-01-09 12:43:03 PM
Meanwhile, Brent Musberger has taken Kate away to his ranch in Montana......"look who I'm wit', suckas"
 
2013-01-09 12:57:59 PM

WTF Indeed: She's not the brightest tool in the shed:
[pbs.twimg.com image 640x960]


MWAHAHAHAHAH...nice~!
 
2013-01-09 01:06:27 PM
I like his mom
 
2013-01-09 01:16:43 PM
CSB - Darnell Dockett was hilarious in college. He was so over-the-top, so unapologetically dickish, he almost had a Warren Sapp-type reverse charisma thing going. I saw him a few times and he was always loud and boisterous. We played in the same intramural basketball league one season and he threatened to beat the farking shiat out of me if I didn't keep banging on him in the post. I was 6'2, 165 lbs. (and not even playing that physical), so I laughed uncomfortably, sure that he had to be joking. He replies with "I'm going to drop you, for real." Now I was pretty sure he was serious, but I still laughed (because I had to make sure no one possibly thought my anorexic pasty ass was afraid of a 270lbs defensive tackle).

Next series down, I put my forearm in his back to try to keep him out of the paint. He turned around and shoved me so hard I fell down and thought I cracked a rib. He gets t'd up and sits out the rest of the game.

Three weeks later I see him on a crowded bus on campus. "Hey Slim, come back here a sec". It took a little bit to realize he was talking to me, so I walk back there. Everyone's looking and I feel like this is some ridiculous John Hughes high school movie or something and I'm about to get my ass kicked. He says he feels bad and knows a girl that a "real fine head doctor" that likes white boys and he'll hook me up. Again, I laughed uncomfortably, unsure if he was serious. He gave me her number and we did a clumsy dap. "We straight". I never called, and, regrettably, threw away the slip of paper.
 
2013-01-09 01:19:02 PM
I farking love having Nine-Oh on the Cards, the dude is always awesome when he gets in the spotlight.

And he's a really good football player.
 
2013-01-09 01:29:39 PM

FLMountainMan: I never called.


You had me until that part.
 
2013-01-09 01:50:46 PM
I don't know what's worse or more embarrassing.
Having an entire nation see your girlfriend is way to hot to be with you.
Or arguing over a thing called "Twitter" at a real football player for hitting on your girl.
 
2013-01-09 02:08:13 PM

FLMountainMan: CSB - Darnell Dockett was hilarious in college. He was so over-the-top, so unapologetically dickish, he almost had a Warren Sapp-type reverse charisma thing going. I saw him a few times and he was always loud and boisterous. We played in the same intramural basketball league one season and he threatened to beat the farking shiat out of me if I didn't keep banging on him in the post. I was 6'2, 165 lbs. (and not even playing that physical), so I laughed uncomfortably, sure that he had to be joking. He replies with "I'm going to drop you, for real." Now I was pretty sure he was serious, but I still laughed (because I had to make sure no one possibly thought my anorexic pasty ass was afraid of a 270lbs defensive tackle).

Next series down, I put my forearm in his back to try to keep him out of the paint. He turned around and shoved me so hard I fell down and thought I cracked a rib. He gets t'd up and sits out the rest of the game.

Three weeks later I see him on a crowded bus on campus. "Hey Slim, come back here a sec". It took a little bit to realize he was talking to me, so I walk back there. Everyone's looking and I feel like this is some ridiculous John Hughes high school movie or something and I'm about to get my ass kicked. He says he feels bad and knows a girl that a "real fine head doctor" that likes white boys and he'll hook me up. Again, I laughed uncomfortably, unsure if he was serious. He gave me her number and we did a clumsy dap. "We straight". I never called, and, regrettably, threw away the slip of paper.


My best CSB run in with an athlete in college was when my girlfirend (now wife) turned down what appeared to be a very high Brad Miller's offer to sleep with her - at that time at Purdue Brad was basically the guy, so I did what any guy in my situation would have done - not a damn thing. I maybe have pride, but starting a fight, in a crowded bar, with a guy over a foot taller than me who happened to be the face of the schools athletic program was not something that seemed like a good plan.
 
2013-01-09 02:13:58 PM

p the boiler: My best CSB run in with an athlete in college was when my girlfirend (now wife) turned down what appeared to be a very high Brad Miller's offer to sleep with her - at that time at Purdue Brad was basically the guy, so I did what any guy in my situation would have done - not a damn thing. I maybe have pride, but starting a fight, in a crowded bar, with a guy over a foot taller than me who happened to be the face of the schools athletic program was not something that seemed like a good plan.


So, you were dating the pretty girl at Purdue?
 
2013-01-09 02:16:45 PM

The Muthaship: p the boiler: My best CSB run in with an athlete in college was when my girlfirend (now wife) turned down what appeared to be a very high Brad Miller's offer to sleep with her - at that time at Purdue Brad was basically the guy, so I did what any guy in my situation would have done - not a damn thing. I maybe have pride, but starting a fight, in a crowded bar, with a guy over a foot taller than me who happened to be the face of the schools athletic program was not something that seemed like a good plan.

So, you were dating the pretty girl at Purdue?


1 guess... IU?
 
2013-01-09 02:18:26 PM

p the boiler: 1 guess... IU?


Where I went to school? Miami of Ohio.

But, visited Purdue a couple times.

*shudder*

You poor bastards.
 
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