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(AZCentral)   You've been officially banned from all Walmarts. Do you: A) Shop at Target? B) Shop at Kmart? C) Go into a Walmart and steal a bucket of chicken?   (azcentral.com) divider line 51
    More: Strange, Wal-Mart  
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5007 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Jan 2013 at 7:05 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-01-09 07:08:48 AM  
Well that depends. Are you: A) Rich, white and snobby B) White trash C) Black?
 
2013-01-09 07:09:56 AM  
What? I can get a bucket of chicken?

Think about that. Where's the nearest Walmart?
 
2013-01-09 07:10:12 AM  
Christ, how the hell do you get banned from ALL Wal-Marts?
 
2013-01-09 07:10:36 AM  

taurusowner: Well that depends. Are you: A) Rich, white and snobby B) White trash C) Black?


Or D, after reading the article, some punk white kid with an arson record.
 
2013-01-09 07:10:54 AM  
Interesting. I would have thought that a person who would steal/eat a bucket of chicken from Walmart would be their core demographic. Way to treat your customers Walmart.
 
2013-01-09 07:10:55 AM  
I didn't know WalMart sold buckets of chicken.
 
2013-01-09 07:11:02 AM  
img405.imageshack.us
 
2013-01-09 07:11:11 AM  

LordJiro: Christ, how the hell do you get banned from ALL Wal-Marts?


And where does one sign up?
 
2013-01-09 07:15:10 AM  
True story...

I was grocery shopping with a friend at a Rainbow late night when we encountered a very, very obnoxious couple. The guy kinda looked like Dizzy Gillespie with a goatee and beret, but he was maybe 500 pounds at the least. The woman with him was so repulsive she could turn guys gay. They were deliberately following me and my friend around--we were the only other customers--and being very annoying. They were arguing constantly and getting in our way and doing just about every passive-aggressive thing short of actually meriting calling the police. They ended up in front of us during checkout and did everything possible to annoy the clerk like returning stuff to shelves, arguing about prices, maybe 20 minutes for a 2-minute checkout. Really, these pathetic folks apparently got their jollies out of annoying total strangers in public places. I was half-tempted to follow them out to the parking lot and beat the shiat out of them with a tire iron, but risking prison over a couple of losers isn't worth it...
 
2013-01-09 07:15:10 AM  

AbbeySomeone: I didn't know WalMart sold buckets of chicken.


It's "bouquet"!
 
2013-01-09 07:15:25 AM  
www.supertopo.com
Stay out of the walmarts!!!
 
2013-01-09 07:16:33 AM  
t0.gstatic.com
"And stay out of the Walmarts!"
 
2013-01-09 07:17:38 AM  
Dammit to hell! I had this one but the first image wouldn't link!
*shakes tiny fist*
 
2013-01-09 07:17:42 AM  
media.monstersandcritics.com

welcome to woolworths, i love you.
 
2013-01-09 07:19:01 AM  

AbbeySomeone: I didn't know WalMart sold buckets of chicken.


They don't. You have to steal them.
 
2013-01-09 07:21:07 AM  
I bet Mr. Gaytan took a lot of crap in elementary school.
 
2013-01-09 07:21:10 AM  
Far more interesting is the story on the sidebar about the former pornstar turned mom link
 
2013-01-09 07:24:00 AM  
How would you punish a homeless person humanely, anyway?
 
2013-01-09 07:27:11 AM  
Think about how low you have sunk when even farking Wal Mart says they don't want you ...
 
2013-01-09 07:30:01 AM  
I got banned from calling Toshiba.
/I will leave out the cool story, bro
 
2013-01-09 07:34:14 AM  
came for the 'O Brother Where Art Thou reference. Glad to see there are some people here with the capability of abstract thought.
 
2013-01-09 07:35:35 AM  
taurusowner Well that depends. Are you: A) Rich, white and snobby B) White trash C) Black?

encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com
Schance Buis

Hey, unfair! It's supposed to always be C). Buzzzttttttt. -1 Fark points for you. Despite the black sounding name, it's a white guy.
 
2013-01-09 07:36:09 AM  
I work in a grocery store. Bans mean nothing, apparently as we keep letting them back in. Ugh.
 
2013-01-09 07:37:04 AM  

varmitydog: Despite the black sounding name


Really? I thought white all the way on this one.
 
2013-01-09 07:38:29 AM  

Happy Hours: It's "bouquet"!


Nothing is obscure on Fark. Nothing.
 
2013-01-09 07:43:20 AM  
Officially banned? Did he get a plaque or something?
 
2013-01-09 07:52:19 AM  
And now for something completely different.

i.ytimg.com
 
2013-01-09 07:53:21 AM  

taurusowner: taurusowner: Well that depends. Are you: A) Rich, white and snobby B) White trash C) Black?

Or D, after reading the article, some punk white kid with an arson record.


"Fark: Come for the snark, stay for the racism!"
 
2013-01-09 07:56:23 AM  

Just another Heartland Weirdass: I got banned from calling Toshiba.
/I will leave out the cool story, bro


You will do no such thing. Regale us with your tale, brethren.
 
2013-01-09 08:17:47 AM  
I read that as "ALL the Walmarts!". thought of the meme and giggled

/csb

Oh by the way:

whipbambucket: [www.supertopo.com image 475x231]
Stay out of the walmarts!!!


MythDragon: [t0.gstatic.com image 334x151]
"And stay out of the Walmarts!"


The All-Powerful Atheismo: And now for something completely different.

[i.ytimg.com image 480x360]


The movie, if you please? I can find video of the joke itself if I know where to start.
 
2013-01-09 08:29:22 AM  
Jim from Saint Paul: The movie, if you please? I can find video of the joke itself if I know where to start.

It's from "O Brother Where Art Thou" Link and the line from the movie was "and stay out of the Woolworths"
 
2013-01-09 08:54:48 AM  

varmitydog: taurusowner Well that depends. Are you: A) Rich, white and snobby B) White trash C) Black?

[encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com image 201x251]
Schance Buis

Hey, unfair! It's supposed to always be C). Buzzzttttttt. -1 Fark points for you. Despite the black sounding name, it's a white guy.


And a typically moronic looking one at that. I would have expected him to be running out to his primer black Civic with a coffee can muffler.
 
2013-01-09 08:56:28 AM  

varmitydog: Jim from Saint Paul: The movie, if you please? I can find video of the joke itself if I know where to start.

It's from "O Brother Where Art Thou" Link and the line from the movie was "and stay out of the Woolworths"


And we was beat up by a bible salesman and banished from Wolworths. I don't know, Everett. Was it the one branch or all of them?
 
TWX
2013-01-09 09:22:55 AM  

LordJiro: Christ, how the hell do you get banned from ALL Wal-Marts?


I was wondering that too, especially given what we've seen on the "People of Walmart" website...
 
2013-01-09 09:31:11 AM  
There might be some rural towns where Wal-Mart has driven all other grocery stores and pharmacies out of business and being banned from all Wal-Marts would be de facto exile.
 
2013-01-09 09:34:16 AM  
What is the proper pronunciation of his first name and if you've been banned from all WalMarts at 18, what do you do with the rest of your life?
 
2013-01-09 10:12:17 AM  
But for god's sake, don't eat the chicken.
 
2013-01-09 10:13:01 AM  

taurusowner: Well that depends. Are you: A) Rich, white and snobby B) White trash C) Black?


i would bet dollars to donuts he was an Obama Voter
 
2013-01-09 10:23:18 AM  
He should have ate the chicken while wandering around the store.

Then dumped the empty bucket and left.

Eating chicken in Walmart sucks, but if his alternative was eating it in the parking lot, then why not.
 
2013-01-09 10:30:37 AM  

clane: i would bet dollars to donuts he was an Obama Voter


I'll cover it. There's no way he voted.
 
2013-01-09 10:33:43 AM  
I know some people already said this, but how could you be banned from all the Wal-Marts? How would employees know? Sounds kind of ridiculous to me when it is all of them. One particular store-yes but not all of them. Definitely qualifies for People of Wal-Mart to me.
 
2013-01-09 10:49:53 AM  

spawn73: He should have ate the chicken while wandering around the store.

Then dumped the empty bucket and left.

Eating chicken in Walmart sucks, but if his alternative was eating it in the parking lot, then why not.


This.

You see people slowly "stealing" grapes as they go about their shopping all the time. The deli employee thought nothing of giving him the bucket, so he probably wouldn't been stopped if he pushed a cart with a few items around for a little while.
 
2013-01-09 10:51:49 AM  

kdawg7736: I know some people already said this, but how could you be banned from all the Wal-Marts? How would employees know? Sounds kind of ridiculous to me when it is all of them. One particular store-yes but not all of them. Definitely qualifies for People of Wal-Mart to me.


It's meaningless. I live in North Walmartistan, Arkansas. There are probably eight or ten supercenters in the area, plus all of the neighborhood markets. No one could know who was banned from where.
 
2013-01-09 10:56:52 AM  

Nem Wan: There might be some rural towns where Wal-Mart has driven all other grocery stores and pharmacies out of business and being banned from all Wal-Marts would be de facto exile.



I'm from a place like that.

And it's true. No friggin' Walmart, nowhere to go at all.
 
2013-01-09 11:06:26 AM  

AbbeySomeone: I didn't know WalMart sold buckets of chicken.


The one's in the South do. I'm from Long Island, so I was shocked at how much more shiat Walmart sells in NC. Popcorn Chicken, fried chicken, rotisserie chicken etc.

It's a black man's paradise
 
2013-01-09 11:15:04 AM  

jdcgonzalez: kdawg7736: I know some people already said this, but how could you be banned from all the Wal-Marts? How would employees know? Sounds kind of ridiculous to me when it is all of them. One particular store-yes but not all of them. Definitely qualifies for People of Wal-Mart to me.

It's meaningless. I live in North Walmartistan, Arkansas. There are probably eight or ten supercenters in the area, plus all of the neighborhood markets. No one could know who was banned from where.


They can't check everyone's ID's either to see if it is a banned person. It only means something for a bar or a private club like the Moose I belong at.
 
2013-01-09 12:32:02 PM  

aintsobad: Far more interesting is the story on the sidebar about the former pornstar turned mom link


"Madison Scott" has done some really kinky shiat.
 
2013-01-09 12:40:45 PM  
A bucket of chicken, yes, but was it fried? Grilled? Rotisserie?

Curse you, Arizona Republic, for not telling a fat man the important facts he needs to know.
 
2013-01-09 02:45:04 PM  
Ever notice those buckets never fit as many pieces as you might think?
 
2013-01-09 09:46:03 PM  

hbk72777: AbbeySomeone: I didn't know WalMart sold buckets of chicken.

The one's in the South do. I'm from Long Island, so I was shocked at how much more shiat Walmart sells in NC. Popcorn Chicken, fried chicken, rotisserie chicken etc.

It's a black man's paradise


Cue thatsracistjpg.

I guess he'll have to hit up a SCOTS concert for his eight piece box.

farm4.staticflickr.com
 
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