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(College Humor)   Thirteen things you should stop doing in 2013. You mean people seek validation from the internet? Who knew?   (collegehumor.com) divider line 91
    More: Obvious, validation  
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9965 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Jan 2013 at 3:36 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-01-09 12:11:08 AM  
I submitted this with a better headline.
 
2013-01-09 12:28:12 AM  
I reply maybe when there is a pretty good chance I will be going, but I can't promise attending due to scheduling issues, AND if the event is something where money will need to be spent depending on the number of attendees.
 
2013-01-09 12:32:08 AM  
Tell this little guy sleeping on my chest with his head on my shoulder I'm not his Dad
 
2013-01-09 12:54:34 AM  
#Bacon
 
2013-01-09 01:08:18 AM  
The author sounds like she needs to be in the hospital hooked up to an IV full of Midol.
 
2013-01-09 01:11:28 AM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Tell this little guy sleeping on my chest with his head on my shoulder I'm not his Dad


At my vet, the reception desk will call back on an intercom when they have the paperwork done on a pet and are paging someone to come escort pet and owner to an exam room.  They always do it "Pet name" "Owner's surname," so when it's my turn I hear "Ozzie and Harriet [Surname] are ready to see Dr. Lindley"
 
2013-01-09 01:28:18 AM  
This was a surprisingly good list.
 
2013-01-09 01:38:30 AM  
If I don't get at least 10 "Funny" votes in this thread I'm going to kill myself!

*sniff*
 
2013-01-09 01:41:11 AM  
I never did any of that shiat.
 
2013-01-09 01:41:51 AM  

fusillade762: If I don't get at least 10 "Funny" votes in this thread I'm going to kill myself!

*sniff*


[Well_bye.jpg]
 
2013-01-09 01:54:24 AM  
....stop putting short lists on multiple pages
 
2013-01-09 02:55:53 AM  

PacManDreaming: The author sounds like she needs to be in the hospital hooked up to an IV full of Midol.


#14 was originally "stop writing whiny articles for second rate websites", but she quickly crossed that one out.
 
2013-01-09 03:40:53 AM  

fusillade762: If I don't get at least 10 "Funny" votes in this thread I'm going to kill myself!

*sniff*


*smart*
 
2013-01-09 03:42:02 AM  
your list was shiat. now go away.
 
2013-01-09 03:43:32 AM  
My dog would be heart broken if she knew I wasn't her mother. Finding out you're adopted is hard.
 
2013-01-09 03:46:30 AM  
other than the complaining about hipsters part, great list.
 
2013-01-09 03:51:49 AM  
Newsflash, shiatty humor Blogger, most of those things are likely going to happen anyway in 2013. Bacon has jumped the shark, Lohan will be dead by March, and the term "hipster" has lost all meaning.

And so what if people want to call themselves pet parents? I'm "daddy" to an adorable mini doxie who sleeps with her butt on my chin, and I like it that way.
 
2013-01-09 03:52:26 AM  
I hope everyone likes this reply.
 
2013-01-09 03:56:40 AM  
"Take a cue from the real hipsters and spend this year working hard not to give a fark."


No, stupid, hipsters give a LOT of farks about what EVERYONE thinks. It's a carefully crafted offbeat image.
 
2013-01-09 03:59:13 AM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Tell this little guy sleeping on my chest with his head on my shoulder I'm not his Dad


I refer to myself as "dad" all the time when talking about my pooch. Granted, it's usually something like, "Jesus you're a retard. Takes after his daddy." And make no mistake...my dog is retarded.
 
2013-01-09 04:06:28 AM  
If your kid is insulted that you refer to yourself as the Dad or Mom of a beloved pet, you're a pretty shiatty parent or you have a farked up kid.
 
2013-01-09 04:10:00 AM  

cowgirl toffee: My dog would be heart broken if she knew I wasn't her mother. Finding out you're adopted is hard.


We're still lovers, though, right?
 
2013-01-09 04:10:26 AM  
If you have to TRY to be quirky..You are not..This also applies to movies/tv/musicians that TRY to be quirky as a gimmick. Just stop..
 
2013-01-09 04:12:08 AM  
List fails without "Split article on internet across multiple pages unless it is gigantic".
 
2013-01-09 04:13:24 AM  
"Pet parent" takes the farking cake
 
2013-01-09 04:13:51 AM  

SnarfVader: If your kid is insulted that you refer to yourself as the Dad or Mom of a beloved pet, you're a pretty shiatty parent or you have a farked up kid.


But the kid should just stop being offended, see?

And you should stop liking pop, because that shiat is apparently mainstream.
 
2013-01-09 04:14:28 AM  

Jesda: It's a carefully crafted offbeat image.


Says the poser. Or is it 'poseur'? But that sounds french and gay. Which is great, for french gay people, but who really gives a fark in Brooklyn? You know? Luckily, I think both pronunciations are the same, so conversationally you needn't get into a debate at the next Bushwick art party about how to say p0zer, but I digress.

In any event, I spot a flaw in your premise. The image is as carefully crafted as can be from behind a fog of cheap beer and useless liberal arts degrees. It is careful in a way, but also the opposite of carefulness. You might even argue it is the height of lacadaisicality and NOT caring, trading the most shallow levels of thought and self-awareness for anything like intelligent thought and creative analysis. In essence, the total avoidance of effort.

I'd perhaps argue that 'carefully crafted' is overly generous to these mental midgets. These abortion-should-of-beens. It is, in fact, a lazily crafted image. And a thoroughly transparent.one at that. But some of those hipster broads are hot, so I've personally drank a lot more Pabst then I can really justify, intellectually.
 
2013-01-09 04:14:31 AM  

SnarfVader: If your kid is insulted that you refer to yourself as the Dad or Mom of a beloved pet, you're a pretty shiatty parent or you have a farked up kid.


This is my little cute-se, woot-se baby....

img543.imageshack.us

... and this is Robert.

img715.imageshack.us
 
2013-01-09 04:15:26 AM  

GranoblasticMan: cowgirl toffee: My dog would be heart broken if she knew I wasn't her mother. Finding out you're adopted is hard.

We're still lovers, though, right?


Yes. But you're still adopted. :P
 
2013-01-09 04:15:42 AM  
I'm with her on the FOX news bit,though.
 
2013-01-09 04:18:07 AM  

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: an adorable mini doxie who sleeps with her butt on my chin, and I like it that way.


There are special corners of the internet for people like you.
 
2013-01-09 04:23:49 AM  

Public Savant: SnarfVader: If your kid is insulted that you refer to yourself as the Dad or Mom of a beloved pet, you're a pretty shiatty parent or you have a farked up kid.

But the kid should just stop being offended, see?

And you should stop liking pop, because that shiat is apparently mainstream.


That's not what I said. I meant you should try taking an interest in your kid and possibly they wouldn't feel that way. Parenting requires attention.
 
2013-01-09 04:26:13 AM  

cowgirl toffee: SnarfVader: If your kid is insulted that you refer to yourself as the Dad or Mom of a beloved pet, you're a pretty shiatty parent or you have a farked up kid.

This is my little cute-se, woot-se baby....

[img543.imageshack.us image 320x320]




I think we've just found our new "Derp" photo.
 
2013-01-09 04:28:10 AM  
14. Posting pictures of an article's writer to make fun of him/her.
0.media.collegehumor.cvcdn.com
 
2013-01-09 04:28:42 AM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Tell this little guy sleeping on my chest with his head on my shoulder I'm not his Dad


My mom would always say that of my cats- that I'm their dad, to which I would respond with irritation (due to having to say it repeatedly) that I am their master.

At least, as much as one can be a master of house cats.
 
2013-01-09 04:29:33 AM  
I'm really sorry all this shiat is going to keep happening in 2013

//first world problems
 
2013-01-09 04:49:52 AM  
most of that list sucked
 
2013-01-09 04:53:53 AM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Tell this little guy sleeping on my chest with his head on my shoulder I'm not his Dad


------

Hey little guy, ask that nearly hairless creature claiming to be your dad if he can lick his own balls. If he can't, he's not a dog and therefore an imposter. Your REAL dad is probably off somewhere sniffing some other dogs butt and peeing on a tree.
 
2013-01-09 04:56:43 AM  

dalovindj: Jesda: It's a carefully crafted offbeat image.

Says the poser. Or is it 'poseur'? But that sounds french and gay. Which is great, for french gay people, but who really gives a fark in Brooklyn? You know? Luckily, I think both pronunciations are the same, so conversationally you needn't get into a debate at the next Bushwick art party about how to say p0zer, but I digress.

In any event, I spot a flaw in your premise. The image is as carefully crafted as can be from behind a fog of cheap beer and useless liberal arts degrees. It is careful in a way, but also the opposite of carefulness. You might even argue it is the height of lacadaisicality and NOT caring, trading the most shallow levels of thought and self-awareness for anything like intelligent thought and creative analysis. In essence, the total avoidance of effort.

I'd perhaps argue that 'carefully crafted' is overly generous to these mental midgets. These abortion-should-of-beens. It is, in fact, a lazily crafted image. And a thoroughly transparent.one at that. But some of those hipster broads are hot, so I've personally drank a lot more Pabst then I can really justify, intellectually.


HIPCEPTION
 
2013-01-09 04:59:06 AM  

fusillade762: If I don't get at least 10 "Funny" votes in this thread I'm going to kill myself!

*sniff*


I hear that's going around.
 
2013-01-09 05:00:16 AM  
I'd like to expand upon the last one and say that we should stop immediately blaming problems on racism by default.
 
2013-01-09 05:00:43 AM  

soundguy: MaudlinMutantMollusk: Tell this little guy sleeping on my chest with his head on my shoulder I'm not his Dad

------

Hey little guy, ask that nearly hairless creature claiming to be your dad if he can lick his own balls. If he can't, he's not a dog and therefore an imposter. Your REAL dad is probably off somewhere sniffing some other dogs butt and peeing on a tree.


If the nearly hairless creature claiming to be his dad COULD lick his own balls, he wouldn't have time to own a dog.
 
2013-01-09 05:11:15 AM  

FirstNationalBastard: If the nearly hairless creature claiming to be his dad COULD lick his own balls, he wouldn't have time to own a dog.


This has always been the bane of my existence, watching my dogs lick themselves. I mean, damn, *I* want to lick my own crotch. Why, lord, did you endow us with opposable thumbs and advanced intelligence but leave out the part about blowing myself? Man, you're an asshole.
 
2013-01-09 05:15:53 AM  

Eps05: MaudlinMutantMollusk: Tell this little guy sleeping on my chest with his head on my shoulder I'm not his Dad

My mom would always say that of my cats- that I'm their dad, to which I would respond with irritation (due to having to say it repeatedly) that I am their master.

At least, as much as one can be a master of house cats.


I'm the master of my Goldfish. But considering that my primary role in their life is flinging fish flakes into their tank, perhaps my role is better described as Master Baiter
 
2013-01-09 05:18:34 AM  
#somePeopleAreSOFussy!!
 
2013-01-09 05:28:20 AM  
making pointless lists is missing from the list
 
2013-01-09 05:28:53 AM  

drjekel_mrhyde: "Pet parent" takes the farking cake


Agreed. It's in the classification of disgustingly cutesy, like people that talk with a baby voice.
 
2013-01-09 05:34:54 AM  
#14. Stop clicking on College "Humor" links
 
2013-01-09 05:35:25 AM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Tell this little guy sleeping on my chest with his head on my shoulder I'm not his Dad


Same for this now 54 month old who still does this regularly

catoftheday.com
 
2013-01-09 05:36:05 AM  
Bacon will never stop being good
 
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