Well that's progress

/up until now I've had to depend on my passengers for those

Claim 6 of the patent explains who the real market is: fleet owners. That claim says the device can phone home to tattle on drivers. Some lawyer out there thinks this was not obvious as of the 2010 filing date.

The severity of the collision is calculated based on vehicle mass. If you're driving a semi and approaching a motorcycle, you're going to die because you have 40 tons behind you. If you're driving a motorcycle and approaching a semi, no big deal because your vehicle weighs a tenth as much as a car. Not much kinetic energy there.

I don't see anything in there to account for other vehicle speed. The assumption seems to be that the vehicle ahead will instantly slow to zero speed. Since braking distance to a stop is greater than normal following distance this device will constantly alert whenever you are in traffic.  But as I said you aren't buying it for yourself. The fleet owner is buying it because a salesman said it would help track unsafe driving.

cool. can they also have the car sense when people are farking in the back seat and remind teens why they should use condoms?

"You would die if you crashed right now"
Oh, we'll that changes those plans then. Note to self: don't crash
Thanks guys!

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Deep Contact: How would you hear it over Metallica?

If you're listening to Metallica, you're dead already.

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: Deep Contact: How would you hear it over Metallica?

If you're listening to Metallica, you're dead already.

And you owe Lars Ulrich a shiatload of money right now for using the name of the band without his permission.... because he is NOT rich enough.

Deep Contact: How would you hear it over Metallica?

Look out for that farmer's market, grampa.

"Pffft, bring it on, meat-bag"

gja: "Pffft, bring it on, meat-bag"

FTA: Their patent-pending system uses the battery of radar, ultrasound sonar and laser sensors found in modern cars and trucks to work out the current kinetic energy of a vehicle

KE = 1/2*m*v^2

m = mass
v = velocity

KE is a scalar quantity, it doesn't have direction like velocity has. You don't need freakin lasers to determine KE.

"Wow, so you smoke weed every time you drive? We're only going to the store. Who are you, Snoop Dogg? Naw, if you were Snoop dog then you would have had to money to get that pinging sound that I am making checked out. When is payday, again?"

Kibbler: It would make the people who drive at 80 go 90 instead.

I sometimes drive at 70.  In daylight, with dry roads, perfect visibility, and light traffic.  Otherwise 55.  Because I understand the (enormous) difference between a crash at 55 and a crash at 70.



/Obscure?

All this thing has to do in order to make accurate calculations is weight the balls of whoever is driving. Females of course, as most everyone knows, do not have balls but that is exactly the baseline the algorithm needs. The more balls you have when driving over the speed limit, the less warning you receive.

*sigh* so much for ever wanting to buy a new car again... thankfully, my finances won't allow it anyway.

Does this come in a model for the elderly?

"You completed the lane change five minutes ago. Turn off your blinker or you may become the victim of road rage."

"Farmer's market ahead. Now entering 'cull the herd' mode..."

"The woman in the passenger seat is not your wife. She will kill you if she finds out."