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(WFAA Fort Worth)   Pastor speaking to congregation: "I have a confession to make, me and my ex-wife were into porn, booze, and drugs. And well, I'm a convicted sex offender... So we cool?"   (wfaa.com) divider line 81
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13225 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Jan 2013 at 8:08 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-01-07 09:30:34 AM

czetie: I can forgive everything except the expression "me and my wife"


I believe that is the reason for the "fail" tag.

/bad grammar is an unforgivable sin.
 
2013-01-07 09:31:46 AM
Good thing he wasn't a teacher - he'd be out of a job now.
 
2013-01-07 09:37:54 AM
Religion: Because the rewards of booze, sex and drugs are all waiting to be claimed by those who denounce them the loudest.
 
2013-01-07 09:38:09 AM
Ah! This is what they dream about. The good ole days.
www.medievalwarfare.info
 
2013-01-07 09:41:08 AM

Deep Contact: Ah! This is what they dream about. The good ole days.
[www.medievalwarfare.info image 300x228]


I think that says more about you than it does about them.

/you poor damaged soul
 
2013-01-07 09:45:46 AM
The reformed whore sings loudest in the church choir, or something.
All sinners are saints, etc.

/lack of surprise
 
2013-01-07 09:46:40 AM
Crewmannumber6: "Preach, brother"

That was the first thing that popped into my head on reading the headline.

/leaving satisfied
 
2013-01-07 09:46:54 AM
I can forgive the booze, the drugs and the porn. But it should be "my ex-wife and I...".

The grammar I cannot forgive.
 
2013-01-07 09:49:41 AM
So, how many underage girls in the congregation has he laid?
 
2013-01-07 09:54:02 AM
Dumbasses. Dude lied about his past to get elected and they still support him. The "We all have a past" lady looks like she spent some hard nights down at the bus station if you know what I mean.
 
2013-01-07 09:57:40 AM

Harry Freakstorm: [freethinker.co.uk image 500x307]

He was in Mustache Riders 1 and 3. Sadly, Mustache Riders 2 really wasn't about mustache riders. It was just a compilations of 8mm porno booth films converted to tape and sound dubbed in. They tried to market it as a follow on to MR1 but the real fans didn't buy it.


Thank goodness that someone on Fark always has the sources, pronto.
 
2013-01-07 09:58:56 AM

AverageAmericanGuy: So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.


Then a rock flew from the back of the crowd, hitting him in the mouth, and he said, "Don't be a smartass, Mom!"
 
2013-01-07 10:05:33 AM

GRCooper: Remember that article about how psychopathy was over represented among CEOs and politicians? I have no doubt that holds doubly so for religious leaders.


Probably because your don't remember what the article said or never read it.
 
2013-01-07 10:17:10 AM
YouBWrong

Dumbasses. Dude lied about his past to get elected and they still support him. The "We all have a past" lady looks like she spent some hard nights down at the bus station if you know what I mean.


Amen, brother.
3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-01-07 10:18:33 AM

Coffee Snob: computerguyUT: As long as he doesn't own any evil black scary guns, it's all good.

You can molest the children all you want, just don't shoot them.

What the fark do guns have to do with it? I swear, you farking gun nuts pretend to be persecuted almost as much as Christians do. We get it, you have a small dick and over compensate for it by carrying a gun. Now go back to jacking off to Guns and Ammo and let the grown ups talk.


Relax, friend. Its the topic of the day and shouty dingleberries are going to shout about it everywhere.

/snot like grabbers are innocent either. Plenty or unrelated threads with people hurrring about wild hogs.
 
2013-01-07 10:20:59 AM

safeinsane: I believe in the family
With my ever-loving wife beside me
She don't know about my girlfriend
Or the man I met last night
Do you believe in God
'Cause that is what I'm selling
And if you want to get to heaven
I'll see you right

/jesus he knows me
//get me $18M by the weekend
///in the name of jeee-sus


Hey, it's just the way they walk man
 
2013-01-07 11:43:05 AM
Looks like someone in the congregation found out about his past and advertised it... then he had to go public over the rumors. If he had previously told the church elders about it during the hiring process, I could see how it'd be a touchy issue and maybe not everyone's business. Hiring & ordination is a pretty long process. Our pastors have been with us for 3 & 4 years and are just now ordained.

In my denomination, the elders can fire the pastor if they have to. He'd have to have some sort of ongoing unrepentant sin, or be teaching something that was unsupportable. I'd feel like firing him if he went 'prosperity gospel' (leaving the congregation unprepared for when things go bad).

Not a pastor, but when they were considering me for jobs in the church, they compared my current behavior with the biblical prerequisites for that job. A lot of the congregation has heard my public testimony. Not all the titillating details, but enough to have a pretty accurate idea of what I've done. The guy who 'disciples' me has heard pretty much everything. He merely told them that I met the prerequisites.
 
2013-01-07 11:45:51 AM

retarded: I can forgive the booze, the drugs and the porn. But it should be "my ex-wife and I...".

The grammar I cannot forgive.


Not reading even the first seven comments before posting I cannot forgive.
 
2013-01-07 12:25:50 PM
"Me and my wife ..."

positiveoutlooksblog.files.wordpress.com

Thanks Pastor Woo-Woo. Too many people already associate Christians with jug eared inbreds. And then you went and confessed all the sewers you did the backstroke through ...
 
2013-01-07 12:38:22 PM
kregh99: I picked the wrong line of work. You can get away with anything doing the Jesus bit.

The problem is that you can never indulge the sinful lifestyle again after you get all Jesusified and stuff.


Sure you can. If you get caught you just play the "frail human being led astray by temptation" card.

Good thing he wasn't a teacher - he'd be out of a job now.

THIS
 
2013-01-07 01:20:37 PM

czetie: retarded: I can forgive the booze, the drugs and the porn. But it should be "my ex-wife and I...".

The grammar I cannot forgive.

Not reading even the first seven comments before posting I cannot forgive.


Being mad at me for posting a similar comment and also being too lazy to read comments before my own I can forgive.
 
2013-01-07 01:27:07 PM

retarded: czetie: retarded: I can forgive the booze, the drugs and the porn. But it should be "my ex-wife and I...".

The grammar I cannot forgive.

Not reading even the first seven comments before posting I cannot forgive.

Being mad at me for posting a similar comment and also being too lazy to read comments before my own I can forgive.


On reflection I realize I'm mad at myself. Having somebody else come up with exactly the same joke made me realize it wasn't nearly as witty as I thought. But I forgive me.
 
2013-01-07 02:12:42 PM

czetie: retarded: czetie: retarded: I can forgive the booze, the drugs and the porn. But it should be "my ex-wife and I...".

The grammar I cannot forgive.

Not reading even the first seven comments before posting I cannot forgive.

Being mad at me for posting a similar comment and also being too lazy to read comments before my own I can forgive.

On reflection I realize I'm mad at myself. Having somebody else come up with exactly the same joke made me realize it wasn't nearly as witty as I thought. But I forgive me.


I'm looking on the bright side and saying that were were independently witty. So there is nothing to forgive and really just compliments to be had.
 
2013-01-07 04:48:14 PM
Forgiveness? What kind of religion do you think this is?
 
2013-01-07 07:04:39 PM
Cool. They're people of the Bible - they'll appreciate it if we stone them to death for adultery....
 
2013-01-07 07:42:02 PM

Crewmannumber6: Deep Contact: Ah! This is what they dream about. The good ole days.
[www.medievalwarfare.info image 300x228]

I think that says more about you than it does about them.

/you poor damaged soul


There are no souls, just religious freaks who abuse kids.
 
2013-01-07 07:52:19 PM
my guess is that he was discovered and the news was already moving around.
 
2013-01-07 07:59:29 PM
Oh, good lord - I don't think I'da told that...
userserve-ak.last.fm
 
2013-01-08 01:56:43 AM
As long as he doesn't show everyone the beastiality sex film staring his wife and that procupine from the National Zoo.
 
2013-01-08 08:36:22 AM

Deep Contact: Crewmannumber6: Deep Contact: Ah! This is what they dream about. The good ole days.
[www.medievalwarfare.info image 300x228]

I think that says more about you than it does about them.

/you poor damaged soul

There are no souls, just religious freaks who abuse kids.


I didn't see anything in this article about kids so, again, I think you're telling us more about yourself than you're meaning to.
 
2013-01-10 11:16:58 PM

wildcardjack: convicted in 1993 for the sexual assault of his ex-wife

Not a kiddy diddler, so he's obviously not Catholic.

Ehh, I'm feeling off my game. I should have something more clever for this thread, but all the easy ones were already covered.


1993? He might have gotten a blow job or tried the backdoor in a Southern state. Sodomy laws were still enforced in some places against "undesirables" a lot later than most people think.
 
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