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(Daily Mail)   Thirty-two-year-old mother-of-two: I was almost killed by my unborn baby's fingernail (w/pics)   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 46
    More: Strange, prenatal development, fingernails  
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20183 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Jan 2013 at 5:02 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



46 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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2013-01-06 07:11:59 PM
Attractive, maybe.
Hot? Only if you're british.
 
2013-01-06 07:21:44 PM
I'd say cute.
 
2013-01-06 07:23:13 PM
She looks hittable for sure, but JESUS CHRIST what is with those kids eyes?
 
2013-01-06 07:31:01 PM
Fingernails and hairs aren't cells and they aren't what cause fluid embolism.
 
2013-01-06 07:43:35 PM
tulsa20something.files.wordpress.com

Approves.
 
2013-01-06 07:57:59 PM

nekom: She looks hittable for sure, but JESUS CHRIST what is with those kids eyes?


Somebody must be holding up a treat.
 
2013-01-06 08:27:32 PM
www.tvequals.com

"If at first you don't succeed..."
 
2013-01-06 09:21:39 PM
Innocent fetus, my ass.  I say fire up the ol' vacuum extractor.  Lock and load, baby.
 
2013-01-06 09:27:59 PM
Headline:  Thirty-two-year-old mother-of-two: I was almost killed by my unborn baby's fingernail (w/pics)
Article picture caption:  Happy family: Mrs Cottom with her husband Peter, four-year-old daughter Olivia and twins Amelie and Ava.

Subby fails at math.
 
2013-01-06 09:28:20 PM
What is the recurring nightmare a pregnant Megan Fox relates to Brian Austin Green, Alex?

/slinks out of thread
 
2013-01-06 09:49:23 PM
Love the URL.
 
2013-01-06 11:24:06 PM
They didn't say hot/cute, so it must be a good link (for once)
Still not clicking.

/we need Apos and his Homer Simpson GIF
 
2013-01-06 11:39:49 PM

DanZero: They didn't say hot/cute, so it must be a good link (for once)
Still not clicking.

/we need Apos and his Homer Simpson GIF



Say no more......

media.tumblr.com
 
2013-01-07 01:24:58 AM

nekom: She looks hittable for sure, but JESUS CHRIST what is with those kids eyes?


POOP IS COMING OUT
 
2013-01-07 01:45:15 AM
Well, any parent can tell you one thing..

Newborn baby fingernails are like freak scalpels. They'll cut you, the baby.. hell, they might even be able to split atoms if the baby moved fast enough.
 
2013-01-07 05:00:16 AM

Mr. Fuzzypaws: Love the URL.


I thought this too. Heheh.
 
2013-01-07 05:13:54 AM
That's peachy. Child tries to abort mother.
 
2013-01-07 05:36:20 AM
ts4.mm.bing.net


now what?
 
2013-01-07 06:00:15 AM
www.heelsandwheelsonline.com
 
2013-01-07 06:04:09 AM
Talk about a guilt trip later. Every mother likes to hold it over their kids' heads how hard the pregnancy was, but this one can literally use the line "I almost died carrying you" during their snotty teenage years.

/those babies are going to bust out the machine guns in the White House one day
 
2013-01-07 06:09:06 AM
Daddy better not use his fingers.
 
2013-01-07 06:13:36 AM
There isno such thing as an unborn baby.
 
2013-01-07 06:15:59 AM
The evil kid is the one on the left, who seems to be gazing directly into the camera as if to say "Just wait till I unleash my adult horrors into your world later!"
 
2013-01-07 07:00:22 AM
www.90smovies.net
 
2013-01-07 07:20:10 AM
www.hauntedstudios.com
 
2013-01-07 07:35:42 AM
Pregnancy is no cakewalk, and this one was a walk through Hell.
 
2013-01-07 07:52:17 AM
Shut up, Meg.

www.webanswers.com
 
2013-01-07 08:10:08 AM
Oh shiat no. Like I needed another reason to be terrified of getting knocked up.
 
2013-01-07 08:15:12 AM

fusillade762: [tulsa20something.files.wordpress.com image 732x407]

Approves.


niiiice,
 
2013-01-07 08:23:40 AM
Hmm, babies fingernails in utero almost kill a mom... well, I might have to check out a story like tha.... OH DEAR GOD THOSE EYES!!! KILL THEM WITH FIRE!!!!!
 
2013-01-07 08:24:17 AM
Why are they sitting on the floor?
 
2013-01-07 08:25:34 AM

Gig103: nekom: She looks hittable for sure, but JESUS CHRIST what is with those kids eyes?

POOP IS COMING OUT


Those eyes say "I will eat your soul!"
 
2013-01-07 08:27:38 AM

Shadow Blasko: Well, any parent can tell you one thing..

Newborn baby fingernails are like freak scalpels. They'll cut you, the baby.. hell, they might even be able to split atoms if the baby moved fast enough.


My infant daughter was on our sofa and I was sitting on the floor in front of her to keep her from accidentally falling off and she grabbed the back of my arm (triceps area) and pinched hard enough to leave a bruise that I had for two farking weeks. I know that part of your arm is pretty sensitive, but she was like 4 months old!
 
2013-01-07 09:03:31 AM

fusillade762: [tulsa20something.files.wordpress.com image 732x407]

Approves.


Came for the Juno reference, leaving satisfied.
 
2013-01-07 09:28:47 AM
Chucky!!
 
2013-01-07 09:34:06 AM
where did this happen?
 
2013-01-07 09:43:39 AM

Shadow Blasko: Well, any parent can tell you one thing..

Newborn baby fingernails are like freak scalpels. They'll cut you, the baby.. hell, they might even be able to split atoms if the baby moved fast enough.


It's true. Babies are tiny little violent knife artists.
 
2013-01-07 09:54:06 AM
nekom: "She looks hittable for sure, but JESUS CHRIST what is with those kids eyes?"

Yeah, they're destined for several horror movies.
Hell, they'd be great for the prequel/remake of THE SHINING.

/ sure, sure, they say 'prequel' these days
// but how is it different from how they do a remake?
 
2013-01-07 10:05:35 AM
/Engage nerd glasses...

upload.wikimedia.org
 
2013-01-07 10:06:40 AM
Stewie reference, check. Everything is in order in this thread.

But I don't get the Karl Pilkington reference. His head is perfectly egg-shaped. Should have been an easy birthing unless it was enormous at the time. Not much need for clucking if it was normal-sized. Pop. Out he comes.

Then again, maybe a long slow birth would explain a lot of things, such as his remarkable ability to misunderstand and muddle up things he reads.

A bonus point is awarded for the fickle finger of fate. Good lateral thinking.
 
2013-01-07 10:33:28 AM
Cells - such as a fingernail or hair
And the Daily Failure today is - biology!
 
2013-01-07 11:30:23 AM
Amniotic fluid embolisms used to be so rare many doctors had never even seen one, but with the increase in medical interventions breaking the barrier between fetus and mother, they've been on the rise. Women who have c-sections are much more likely to suffer from one because their abdominal cavity is flooded with amniotic fluid.
 
2013-01-07 12:26:59 PM
She's a teacher. We'll likely be hearing about her on fark again one day.
 
2013-01-07 02:31:42 PM
I read that as "unicorn baby".

That would have made a lot of sense.
 
2013-01-07 05:02:35 PM
well I guess we know whose is moms favorite
 
2013-01-08 01:55:12 AM
That's nothing. How about when an unborn baby's fingernails (and lips, and eye, and ear) almost kill his adolescent brother?

charnelhouse.tripod.com
 
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