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(The Sun)   Ex-Madam with a heart of gold for the disabled plans to open a brothel for them   (thesun.co.uk) divider line 108
    More: Spiffy, home counties, sexual contact, Old English  
•       •       •

11088 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Jan 2013 at 6:23 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



108 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread
 
2013-01-06 02:54:24 PM  
The two-roomed establishment, called Para Doxies from the old English word for prostitues, will be sufficient for two sex workers, carers and staff to assist clients with their day-to-day needs, says Becky.

24.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-01-06 02:54:28 PM  
Madam opens the door and on the porch is man with no arms or legs.

He says, " Bring me a women. "

Madam says, " What are you going to do with a woman? "

He says, " I rang the doorbell, didn't I . . . "
 
2013-01-06 03:10:54 PM  
Gimps need nubbin to.
 
2013-01-06 03:14:35 PM  
So you've got a room full of leather, steel, and rubber. But enough about the wheelchair storage...
 
2013-01-06 03:23:52 PM  
That's a hard 44.
 
2013-01-06 03:26:40 PM  
Will there also be handicapped hookers provided for those who like Meals on Wheels?
 
2013-01-06 03:44:31 PM  

unyon: That's a hard 44.


44 going on 65.
 
2013-01-06 03:50:04 PM  
tangledcostumes.com
 
2013-01-06 04:00:39 PM  
Dad will be so proud that little Becky finally found a job.
 
2013-01-06 04:14:02 PM  
Approves:

fuelsoffaith.com
 
MBK [TotalFark]
2013-01-06 04:38:10 PM  
Wait, the hookers will be disabled, the customers, or both?
 
2013-01-06 05:51:16 PM  
Why would anyone give disabled people gold hearts? What are they going to do with them?
 
2013-01-06 05:54:47 PM  
Freaky retard sex for everyone!

/Don't judge me
 
2013-01-06 06:26:43 PM  
Jim Jeffries would be very happy about this

Link
 
2013-01-06 06:27:19 PM  
I can see from her forehead and temple that she will also be catering to the blind.
 
2013-01-06 06:29:31 PM  
Why not a Hero tag?
 
2013-01-06 06:30:10 PM  

unyon: That's a hard 44.


This. She looks old enough to be my mother and I am 46.
 
2013-01-06 06:30:16 PM  
Cool....I'm handicapped and going to England.
 
2013-01-06 06:31:01 PM  
She deserves a hero tag. For those disabled folks who are not exactly likely to obtain some good ole fashioned lovin the way the rest of us do, or who simply dont have the time or resources to dedicate to chasing it, a pro should be an option. It gives them a chance to experience something they might not otherwise get to. The disabled deserve sex every bit as much as the rest of us.
 
2013-01-06 06:33:00 PM  
I'll bet she was a hottie during WW2.
 
2013-01-06 06:36:37 PM  
FTA: In Holland disabled people can receive public money in order to pay for sexual relations up to 12 times a year.

I'm picturing the number of heads that would explode if we tried something like this here in the US.
 
2013-01-06 06:37:27 PM  
Cane and Able? Hey, that's just how they roll.
 
2013-01-06 06:37:50 PM  
Reminds me, this year's Found Footage Festival has a tutorial video for teaching mentally handicapped people to masturbate.

Yes, it's just as uncomfortable as it sounds.
 
2013-01-06 06:38:42 PM  
Wasn't this an episode of Secret Diary of a Call Girl?
 
2013-01-06 06:40:41 PM  
Set up like a drive-thru, perhaps?
 
2013-01-06 06:43:26 PM  

Ima4nic8or: She deserves a hero tag. For those disabled folks who are not exactly likely to obtain some good ole fashioned lovin the way the rest of us do, or who simply dont have the time or resources to dedicate to chasing it, a pro should be an option. It gives them a chance to experience something they might not otherwise get to. The disabled deserve sex every bit as much as the rest of us.


This.

As long as there's protections in place for the girls and everyone is safe, knock yourselves out.
 
2013-01-06 06:44:45 PM  

OtherLittleGuy: Approves:

[fuelsoffaith.com image 461x426]


cf.drafthouse.com

Wants ones who don't taste like cigarettes.
 
2013-01-06 06:45:34 PM  
How does she qualify to be called an ex-madam?
 
2013-01-06 06:49:20 PM  

red5ish: How does she qualify to be called an ex-madam?


She had an Addadicktomie.
 
2013-01-06 06:49:59 PM  
How much for a Handi-job?
 
2013-01-06 06:50:33 PM  
Becky Adams says "Everyone deserves to experience and enjoy sexual contact"

There is hope for us Farkers!
 
2013-01-06 06:50:52 PM  

tomo12144: Jim Jeffries would be very happy about this

Link


I hear he really knows his way around a lady's tubes.
 
2013-01-06 06:51:27 PM  
Who wants handicapped hookers?
 
2013-01-06 06:53:09 PM  

the_chief: Who wants handicapped hookers?


Sounds like a Golfing term.
 
2013-01-06 06:54:01 PM  
HEADLINE NEWS

Charlie Sheen has been spotted in the UK... in a wheelchair.
 
2013-01-06 06:54:52 PM  
Disabled only? In the UK? What if someone who isn't disabled wants to go there, will they be turned away so they can sue for discrimination?
 
2013-01-06 06:56:43 PM  
When I read the headline, I thought she was opening a brothel for disabled prostitutes.
 
2013-01-06 07:01:52 PM  
Her business model is obvious: find older uglier hookers, who can't get much money in most places, and charge the same rate as the fancier establishments to guys who are just happy to be touched. The welfare system that pays for it just proves she will have steady clientele. Her motto: 'You don't like what you see, you can go to the next brothel. Oh wait, they don't have a wheelchair ramp.'
 
2013-01-06 07:03:07 PM  
Pimps for Gimps.
 
2013-01-06 07:17:41 PM  
Do you honestly think a man with a foot & a half could satisfy her?
 
2013-01-06 07:20:58 PM  

fusillade762: Why would anyone give disabled people gold hearts? What are they going to do with them?


To power infinite improbability drives, duh.
 
2013-01-06 07:23:25 PM  

tomo12144: Jim Jeffries would be very happy about this

Link


Came here to link this, glad you got it covered.

"Nine inches of disabled misery!"
 
2013-01-06 07:29:55 PM  
Apparently you can't teach an old dog new tricks.
 
2013-01-06 07:40:37 PM  

Famous Thamas: FTA: In Holland disabled people can receive public money in order to pay for sexual relations up to 12 times a year.

I'm picturing the number of heads that would explode if we tried something like this here in the US.


www.shadowlocked.com

I'm an able-bodied man and I haven't had a conjugal visit in 6 months.
 
2013-01-06 07:41:38 PM  
Like the chick above said... 44? I'm older than the Madame and all of a sudden have great confidence! Additionally, I think that this is wonderful and I wish them all the best!
/I really mean it
//don't begrudge a brother
 
2013-01-06 07:43:42 PM  
There's a good documentary here about a similar sex worker in Australia (sorry, Canada only, might try it on PBS if you're in the US though).
 
mjg
2013-01-06 07:44:21 PM  
southparkstudios.mtvnimages.com

Timmay!
 
2013-01-06 07:48:48 PM  
mentally disabled people need lovin', too. seriously, the mentally retarded have exactly the same urges as others, and are often very frustrated in this regard. or their roommates in the group home help them out, with varying degrees of willingness, even tho same-sex encounters might seem as unappealing to them as they do to some of us.

so where's the 'tard brothel? i recommend stocking it with norms and 'tards, rather than just allowing them as clients, and allowing people with or without disability as clients for anyone.

also, the world needs 'tard porn. there's opportunities for profit while helping out disabled people here, people!
 
2013-01-06 07:49:59 PM  
So, basically the playboy mansion at this point?

//ba dmm tssh
 
2013-01-06 08:01:05 PM  
Wow. That's a great idea. Good for her.
 
2013-01-06 08:03:15 PM  

Nothing To See Here: the_chief: Who wants handicapped hookers?

Sounds like a Golfing term.


I want to join a golf team just to get that t-shirt
 
2013-01-06 08:07:40 PM  
The only sad part about this is thinking that cripples and retards have been getting turned away from brothels all this time.
 
2013-01-06 08:18:14 PM  

zato_ichi: How much for a Handi-job?


Parkinson's or non?
 
2013-01-06 08:19:48 PM  
It's Malory Archer.
 
2013-01-06 08:33:48 PM  
I had a similar idea years ago, it was going to be focused on amputees . The place was going to be named "Stumps and Humps"
 
2013-01-06 08:34:58 PM  
img.thesun.co.uk
tunc.biz
/Twin Hatchlings?
 
2013-01-06 08:37:49 PM  

lack of warmth: Her business model is obvious: find older uglier hookers, who can't get much money in most places, and charge the same rate as the fancier establishments to guys who are just happy to be touched. The welfare system that pays for it just proves she will have steady clientele. Her motto: 'You don't like what you see, you can go to the next brothel. Oh wait, they don't have a wheelchair ramp.'


Actually, I could see girls wanting to work here. Customers that truly appreciate the service.
 
2013-01-06 08:42:56 PM  
I don't like this because its too easy to trick the blind.
 
2013-01-06 08:50:50 PM  
FTA: Becky argues the Para Doxies team will simply "educate and facilitate disabled people in their sexuality, with third parties acting as aides, performing functions disabled clients themselves cannot".

And that's the sound of a lot of mom's basement dwelling Farkers beating feet to the nearest travel agency, looking to go overseas for an interview.

It's their best chance at getting anything that resembles poosy in years.
 
2013-01-06 08:54:09 PM  

tomo12144: Jim Jeffries would be very happy about this

Link


That was highly relevant! Thanks!

Where is the rest? I...I think...I think I want to hear about disabled John/hooker sex.
 
2013-01-06 08:54:45 PM  

Tumunga: FTA: Becky argues the Para Doxies team will simply "educate and facilitate disabled people in their sexuality, with third parties acting as aides, performing functions disabled clients themselves cannot".


These people are heroes but the less I know about this, the better.
 
2013-01-06 08:55:17 PM  

lack of warmth: Her business model is obvious: find older uglier hookers, who can't get much money in most places, and charge the same rate as the fancier establishments to guys who are just happy to be touched. The welfare system that pays for it just proves she will have steady clientele. Her motto: 'You don't like what you see, you can go to the next brothel. Oh wait, they don't have a wheelchair ramp.'


I'm willing to bet that, if she turns a proffit, the next brothel over damn well will have a ramp in a week.

And the girls might be thrilled to work there. If the guy gets cheeky, they just get up and walk away.
 
2013-01-06 08:55:22 PM  
That was a thing in "Born on the Fourth of July."
 
2013-01-06 08:57:20 PM  
I have the weirdest boner right now.

/because of the muscular dystrophy
 
2013-01-06 09:04:04 PM  
If a light sleeper sleeps with a light on
What does a hard sleeper sleep with?
Discuss.................
 
2013-01-06 09:07:26 PM  

Badgers: [img.thesun.co.uk image 620x895]
[tunc.biz image 505x458]
/Twin Hatchlings?


tunc.biz

SOON
 
2013-01-06 09:09:09 PM  
She should just make sure the prostis are STI free.
 
2013-01-06 09:09:28 PM  

Badgers: [img.thesun.co.uk image 620x895]
[tunc.biz image 505x458]
/Twin Hatchlings?


Well, Callista does sleep with a gimp...
 
R3
2013-01-06 09:13:42 PM  

White_Scarf_Syndrome: tomo12144: Jim Jeffries would be very happy about this

Link

That was highly relevant! Thanks!

Where is the rest? I...I think...I think I want to hear about disabled John/hooker sex.


IIRC, the stand-up gig where he covered this was called Alcoholocaust...look it up on imdb/torrent provider near you for more details.
Good stuff all around, btw.
 
2013-01-06 09:13:59 PM  
I'm going to open a wheelchair rental business right next door
 
2013-01-06 09:15:17 PM  

Gyrfalcon: The only sad part about this is thinking that cripples and retards have been getting turned away from brothels all this time.


Console yourself by asking, have these cripples and retards had at least a ten-spot in their wallets? See, they were fine.
 
2013-01-06 09:15:39 PM  
Just like there are no ex-Marines, there are no ex-madams.
 
2013-01-06 09:15:58 PM  
Sounds like Letters to Penthouse material.
 
2013-01-06 09:17:09 PM  
i50.tinypic.com
 
2013-01-06 09:17:11 PM  

Keys dude: That was a thing in "Born on the Fourth of July."


Let's be fair. It also comes up in Fight Club.
 
2013-01-06 09:17:44 PM  

R3: White_Scarf_Syndrome: tomo12144: Jim Jeffries would be very happy about this

Link

That was highly relevant! Thanks!

Where is the rest? I...I think...I think I want to hear about disabled John/hooker sex.

IIRC, the stand-up gig where he covered this was called Alcoholocaust...look it up on imdb/torrent provider near you for more details.
Good stuff all around, btw.


Cool, thanks.

Alcoholocaust. I am not sure why that phrase hasn't come earlier. Very, very good.
 
2013-01-06 09:29:49 PM  

Tentacle: I'm going to open a wheelchair rental business right next door


www.7sem.ru
BRILLIANT!
 
2013-01-06 09:38:40 PM  
Reminds me of this service in Japan. (NSFW LINK)
Link
 
2013-01-06 10:02:37 PM  
Presumably there'll be a place for disabled Peeping Toms to watch from
images.fineartamerica.com
 
2013-01-06 10:13:51 PM  

Badgers: [img.thesun.co.uk image 620x895]
[tunc.biz image 505x458]
/Twin Hatchlings?


The Brit has better teeth, less plastic abuse, and is using her urges for good, not evil.
 
2013-01-06 10:22:29 PM  
Fark, you're slipping.

www.beertripper.com
 
2013-01-06 10:26:28 PM  

Another Government Employee: lack of warmth: Her business model is obvious: find older uglier hookers, who can't get much money in most places, and charge the same rate as the fancier establishments to guys who are just happy to be touched. The welfare system that pays for it just proves she will have steady clientele. Her motto: 'You don't like what you see, you can go to the next brothel. Oh wait, they don't have a wheelchair ramp.'

Actually, I could see girls wanting to work here. Customers that truly appreciate the service.


We are talking about a british brothel, so don't expect high quality. Also, I am picturing the clients like a coworker of mine that has mds. He struggles with walking, however by far not his worse handicap. He is so mentally screwed up that he argues with himself in two voices and needs help figuring out time. He does not have a mental handicap, instead his parents controlled his life till he is left with no real skills. He can't get any woman to take him seriously, so his parents buy him hookers. I know people with mds that have normal relationships, marriages and children. Other than driving, this guy doesn't have better life skills than an eight year old. I don't see this as a positive thing. It is possible for handicap people to find real love and enjoy sex with someone who cares about their sexual desires. Anyone who turns down the idea of loving someone based on physical challenges have their own issues to work on.
 
2013-01-06 11:17:46 PM  

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: [i50.tinypic.com image 620x895]


That is just awesomely creepy. I won't be sleeping well tonight. Nicely done.
 
2013-01-06 11:25:18 PM  
FINALLY ! ! !

Now I can boink a stumpy.
 
2013-01-06 11:48:20 PM  
So...crippled whores or crippled johns? both?
 
2013-01-06 11:52:09 PM  
No Hero tag?
 
2013-01-07 12:07:14 AM  

gmpathfinder: Fark, you're slipping.

[www.beertripper.com image 620x642]


...Jesus H. Fark tap-dancing on a cracker, does that woman play  any non-creepy roles.

/Had to resist the urge to call her 'Princess Amanda' in Xena
//Because that is one typecast woman.
 
2013-01-07 12:26:50 AM  
the801:
"mentally disabled people need lovin', too. seriously, the mentally retarded have exactly the same urges as others, and are often very frustrated in this regard. or their roommates in the group home help them out, with varying degrees of willingness, even tho same-sex encounters might seem as unappealing to them as they do to some of us.

so where's the 'tard brothel? i recommend stocking it with norms and 'tards, rather than just allowing them as clients, and allowing people with or without disability as clients for anyone."

Um, no. That would be essentially boning a child.

You seem a bit mentally disabled yourself...
 
2013-01-07 12:28:41 AM  

gmpathfinder: Fark, you're slipping.


Came here for this. Better to be satisfied late than never.
 
2013-01-07 12:36:26 AM  

PsiChick: gmpathfinder: Fark, you're slipping.

[www.beertripper.com image 620x642]

...Jesus H. Fark tap-dancing on a cracker, does that woman play  any non-creepy roles.


I wouldn't call her role there "creepy". I have a lot of other words for it, though.
 
2013-01-07 12:51:33 AM  

Badgers: /Twin Hatchlings?


I was just thinking Callista was looking a bit rough!
 
2013-01-07 12:57:29 AM  
The Madam was known to query, " Is that a wooden leg, or are just happy to see me? "
 
2013-01-07 01:04:17 AM  
In some respects, this is a good thing. But there is one potential issue that I see.

Imagine if they can only afford this 10 times a year or less. What if they experience it for the first time and want it more? Is it worse to have never experienced something or to have experienced something and then go without?
 
2013-01-07 01:35:37 AM  
FTFA: And Becky, who ran illegal brothels in the Home Counties for 20 years before retiring in 2010

Has Britain legalized brothels in the last couple of years?
 
2013-01-07 03:03:51 AM  

fusillade762: PsiChick: gmpathfinder: Fark, you're slipping.

[www.beertripper.com image 620x642]

...Jesus H. Fark tap-dancing on a cracker, does that woman play  any non-creepy roles.

I wouldn't call her role there "creepy". I have a lot of other words for it, though.


Hunh, I figured from the expression it was a creeper role. What's the movie title?
 
2013-01-07 03:14:04 AM  

PsiChick: fusillade762: PsiChick: gmpathfinder: Fark, you're slipping.

[www.beertripper.com image 620x642]

...Jesus H. Fark tap-dancing on a cracker, does that woman play  any non-creepy roles.

I wouldn't call her role there "creepy". I have a lot of other words for it, though.

Hunh, I figured from the expression it was a creeper role. What's the movie title?


Firefly, the episode titled "Heart of Gold".
 
2013-01-07 06:16:05 AM  

Bucky Katt: FTFA: And Becky, who ran illegal brothels in the Home Counties for 20 years before retiring in 2010

Has Britain legalized brothels in the last couple of years?


Brothels, per se, are illegal, - the definition being 'more than one prostitute working in a single domicile'
IIRC, the official title is 'A Bawdy House'

if you use a looser defintion...... a domicile with only one prostitute working the premises at any one time, then that is fully Legal

prostitution, per se, is legal

soliciting is illegal
living off of immoral earning (being a Pimp) is illegal
 
2013-01-07 09:10:23 AM  
I'm not sure which comments is better.

Hey she looks like Hillary Clinton's (evil twin) sister

or

I always wanted to do a one legged hooker, so I am so there dude
 
2013-01-07 09:18:00 AM  
Finally I can make all my Katawa Shojou fantasies come true! Dibs on the burn victim!
 
2013-01-07 10:21:50 AM  

FarkLordOfTheSith: PsiChick: fusillade762: PsiChick: gmpathfinder: Fark, you're slipping.

[www.beertripper.com image 620x642]

...Jesus H. Fark tap-dancing on a cracker, does that woman play  any non-creepy roles.

I wouldn't call her role there "creepy". I have a lot of other words for it, though.

Hunh, I figured from the expression it was a creeper role. What's the movie title?

Firefly, the episode titled "Heart of Gold".


Never aired.
 
2013-01-07 11:05:08 AM  

the801: also, the world needs 'tard porn.


What, you never saw the Paris Hilton video??
 
2013-01-07 11:22:17 AM  

lack of warmth: Anyone who turns down the idea of loving someone based on physical challenges have their own issues to work on.


most people won't even date outside their own race.

you REALLY think that people that don't want to have sex with misshappen or retarded lumps of human flesh have ISSUES?

It is one thing to be in love and to stay in love after something horrible happens to your loved one.

It is quite another for a normal to find love with the handicapped. Usually that involves fetishes or other outside the norm bullcrap.
 
2013-01-07 11:59:49 AM  

calbert: [tangledcostumes.com image 724x407]


I didn't get around to seeing that one but I heard it was pretty good and have it saved on my Netflix queue already.
 
2013-01-07 12:49:24 PM  

FarkLordOfTheSith: PsiChick: fusillade762: PsiChick: gmpathfinder: Fark, you're slipping.

[www.beertripper.com image 620x642]

...Jesus H. Fark tap-dancing on a cracker, does that woman play  any non-creepy roles.

I wouldn't call her role there "creepy". I have a lot of other words for it, though.

Hunh, I figured from the expression it was a creeper role. What's the movie title?

Firefly, the episode titled "Heart of Gold".


Ah, thank you. On to teh interwebs!

...Hunh. That actually isn't an entirely creepy role. I'm really impressed. Seriously screwed up, but (supposedly) not creepy.
 
2013-01-07 01:11:41 PM  
HERO
 
2013-01-07 01:43:54 PM  
I wonder if she will have men that will service gay disabled men or will service disabled women?

I work with the disabled (primarily cerebral palsy) and they get very lonely
:(

Not that it's legal here. Guess they could make a trip to canada.

/do have a client who a gay male porn star sees for free. Nice of him .
 
2013-01-07 03:48:59 PM  

KatjaMouse: calbert: [tangledcostumes.com image 724x407]

I didn't get around to seeing that one but I heard it was pretty good and have it saved on my Netflix queue already.


once you get over the uncomfortableness of the subject, it was done incredibly well and I hope to see it get some Oscar nods for actor, actress, and supporting actor.
 
2013-01-07 06:43:43 PM  
In Holland disabled people can receive public money in order to pay for sexual relations up to 12 times a year.


WTH??? dang.. what other benefits do disable folks get over there?
 
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