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(Time)   How to make your man cave, pillow fort or tree house spy-proof   (nation.time.com) divider line 34
    More: Interesting, SCI, finished work, Security Environment Threat List, random samples, Top Secret, disk storage  
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12051 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Jan 2013 at 8:55 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



34 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-01-06 08:45:45 AM
How about an article on how to eliminate stupid words from the lexicon. First up: man cave.
 
2013-01-06 09:02:03 AM
SCIF finish work (work that includes closing up wall structures; installing, floating, taping and sealing wallboards; installing trim, chair rail, molding, and floorboards; painting; etc.) in Category I and II countries shall be accomplished by TOP SECRET-cleared, U.S. personnel.

fark. Where the hell am I going to find TOP SECRET-cleared U.S. personnel?
 
2013-01-06 09:05:13 AM
I read that as: How to make your man cave, pillow fort or tree house spy roof

I was seriously bummed when it wasn't a DIY article.
 
2013-01-06 09:05:37 AM
Forget spy-proof. Wife proof. That's where the big market is.
 
2013-01-06 09:06:06 AM

dugitman: How about an article on how to eliminate stupid words from the lexicon. First up: man cave.


But then, where would bromance blossom?
 
2013-01-06 09:07:52 AM
- The ability of a SCIF structure to retain sound within the perimeter is rated using a descriptive value, the Sound Transmission Class (STC). To satisfy the normal security standards of SCIFs, the following transmission attenuation groups have been established:
...Sound Group 3 - STC 45 or better. Loud speech from within the SCIF can be faintly heard but not understood outside of the SCIF. Normal speech is unintelligible with the unaided human ear.
...Sound Group 4 - STC 50 or better. Very loud sounds within the SCIF, such as loud singing, brass music, or a radio at full volume, can be heard with the human ear faintly or not at all outside of the SCIF.
...Sound Group 5 - STC 55 or better. Ultra loud sounds within the SCIF, such as belching, farting, or other toilet-shattering emanations are rendered as a light breeze of the wind to all outside of the SCIF.


Ok, THAT'S what my man shame-cave needs!
 
2013-01-06 09:08:31 AM
As I understand it, the best way to make a man cave is to withold sex from him.
Works on me.
 
2013-01-06 09:09:38 AM

AverageAmericanGuy: SCIF finish work (work that includes closing up wall structures; installing, floating, taping and sealing wallboards; installing trim, chair rail, molding, and floorboards; painting; etc.) in Category I and II countries shall be accomplished by TOP SECRET-cleared, U.S. personnel.

fark. Where the hell am I going to find TOP SECRET-cleared U.S. personnel?


I know, all I can find are guys at the 7-11.

/maybe they can pass a lifestyle poly
 
2013-01-06 09:10:55 AM
www.wouldyoubelieve.com
 
2013-01-06 09:18:58 AM
A mil-spec consultant named Cofer
He once had a government chauffeur
Posted a doc, marked up
Didn't think he'd farked up
Now he's looking for work as a gofer

//DNR all 161 pages, but surprised if no one gets blamed for classifying this releasable
 
2013-01-06 09:24:55 AM
It's all good until someone goes to a bar and starts to mumble.
 
2013-01-06 09:26:57 AM

4tehsnowflakes: A mil-spec consultant named Cofer
He once had a government chauffeur
Posted a doc, marked up
Didn't think he'd farked up
Now he's looking for work as a gofer

//DNR all 161 pages, but surprised if no one gets blamed for classifying this releasable


Meh, Working in a data center we have varying degrees of stuff on this list.
 
2013-01-06 09:43:08 AM
But what if the spy is using the dead ringer?
 
2013-01-06 09:45:02 AM
Windows shall be non-opening

Done and done.

regmedia.co.uk
 
2013-01-06 09:45:48 AM
And remember to remove one number from the building's address sign thus utterly confusing any would be spy.

i264.photobucket.com
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2013-01-06 09:47:31 AM
When expanding existing SCIF space into areas not controlled at the SECRET level, maximum demolition of the new SCIF area is required.

Anybody else want this job?
 
2013-01-06 10:06:57 AM
Looking for DogFort.  Leaving thread disappointed.
 
2013-01-06 10:18:33 AM

AverageAmericanGuy: SCIF finish work (work that includes closing up wall structures; installing, floating, taping and sealing wallboards; installing trim, chair rail, molding, and floorboards; painting; etc.) in Category I and II countries shall be accomplished by TOP SECRET-cleared, U.S. personnel.

fark. Where the hell am I going to find TOP SECRET-cleared U.S. personnel?


Check Angie's List?

Also:
2. When the lock is taken out of service, it will be reset to 50-25-50.

Now I know the first combination to try should I need to open any government combination locks.
 
2013-01-06 10:23:06 AM

kokomo61: Forget spy-proof. Wife proof. That's where the big market is.


Divorce works wonders. I enjoy countless hours of uninterrupted me time in my pillow forts since I got one. You should try it!
 
2013-01-06 10:25:12 AM

dugitman: How about an article on how to eliminate stupid words from the lexicon. First up: man cave.


That's two words....

/derp
 
2013-01-06 10:34:42 AM

LordOfThePings: Windows shall be non-opening

Done and done.

[regmedia.co.uk image 425x425]


*GOLF CLAP*

But does it have CHAIR RAILS?!?!?!
 
2013-01-06 11:06:58 AM

kokomo61: Forget spy-proof. Wife proof. That's where the big market is.


bbsimg.ngfiles.com
 
2013-01-06 11:24:32 AM
This is not a "how to".
It's a specification. This is what the contractor building the thing gets.
How to accomplish all those things is the contractor's problem.

Also, the navy apparently uses invalid security certificates. That or it's a fake.
Given probability of stupidity > probability of malice, I'd say the former.
A security specification on a site with an invalid security certificate...
There used to be a word for that, but it's been crapped on so much we need a new word.
 
2013-01-06 11:38:02 AM

AverageAmericanGuy: SCIF finish work (work that includes closing up wall structures; installing, floating, taping and sealing wallboards; installing trim, chair rail, molding, and floorboards; painting; etc.) in Category I and II countries shall be accomplished by TOP SECRET-cleared, U.S. personnel.

fark. Where the hell am I going to find TOP SECRET-cleared U.S. personnel?


They are out there - the real question is finding guys with TS that can also sheet rock. Come to think of it, most of the scifs I've been in had pretty shoddy finish work, but that was 30 years ago. There's a lot more to it than in TFA. Most scifs would make great recording studios. Probably your best bet would be to do a little research; find ex-military with the MOS job classifications that require TS through the employment office. On the downside you might need to go to every state's office, on the upside most offices have a veterans rep. It's a fair guess no one you find will have much experience framing and mudding, but you'll find they all have the ability to learn very quickly. Wish someone would have approached me years ago - it was tough translating my ASA experience to the civilian job market. The tough part will be you getting the clearance; they go back to everyplace you've ever lived and find two people that knew you. Old friends might not tell you, they just think you are being investigated for something bad - if you are a sheetrocker it probably wouldn't surprise them though.
 
2013-01-06 12:07:27 PM
Reminds me of the time I was in a SCIF and the technician working in there was listening to his radio. Something told me the eloectromagnetic integrity of the room hadn't been checked recently.
 
2013-01-06 12:14:48 PM
Don't use russian steel.
 
2013-01-06 12:23:18 PM

karlandtanya: This is not a "how to".
It's a specification. This is what the contractor building the thing gets.
How to accomplish all those things is the contractor's problem.

Also, the navy apparently uses invalid security certificates. That or it's a fake.
Given probability of stupidity > probability of malice, I'd say the former.
A security specification on a site with an invalid security certificate...
There used to be a word for that, but it's been crapped on so much we need a new word.


For 'how-to' watch Burn Notice.
 
2013-01-06 12:51:40 PM

Louisiana_Sitar_Club: dugitman: How about an article on how to eliminate stupid words from the lexicon. First up: man cave.

But then, where would bromance blossom?


Yeah, he's just jelly.
 
2013-01-06 01:15:41 PM

kokomo61: Forget spy-proof. Wife proof. That's where the big market is.


Or just marry someone you don't hate being around.
 
2013-01-06 01:51:12 PM

Louisiana_Sitar_Club: dugitman: How about an article on how to eliminate stupid words from the lexicon. First up: man cave.

But then, where would bromance blossom?


Love can bloom even on the battlefield! Snake told me so!
 
2013-01-06 02:09:49 PM

SDRR: kokomo61: Forget spy-proof. Wife proof. That's where the big market is.

Divorce works wonders. I enjoy countless hours of uninterrupted me time in my pillow forts since I got one. You should try it!


That's one of my New Years' resolutions.
 
2013-01-06 02:48:10 PM

jjorsett: Reminds me of the time I was in a SCIF and the technician working in there was listening to his radio. Something told me the eloectromagnetic integrity of the room hadn't been checked recently.


It's not so much about not getting in, but getting out. On the plus side you never have to do homework.
 
2013-01-06 02:53:13 PM
"2. When the lock is taken out of service, it will be reset to 50-25-50."

Now that could come in handy.
 
2013-01-07 09:01:22 AM

rick42: [www.wouldyoubelieve.com image 600x400]


WHAT?!??
 
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