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(Oregon Public Broadcasting)   18-year-old posts to Facebook "Drivin drunk ... classsic ;) but to whoever's vehicle i hit i am sorry. :P" What could possibly go wrong?   (opb.org) divider line 115
    More: Dumbass, Facebook, drunk drivers, Astoria  
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18218 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Jan 2013 at 4:34 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-01-04 01:07:51 PM
meh, he'll get a lawyer and that charge will be dropped.  sure, the kid was a dumbass but...facebook posts alone don't prove criminal conduct.  now, if this idiot had posted a video of himself driving drunk and sideswiping a car...then his ass would be in serious trouble.
 
2013-01-04 01:25:02 PM

Weaver95: meh, he'll get a lawyer and that charge will be dropped.  sure, the kid was a dumbass but...facebook posts alone don't prove criminal conduct.  now, if this idiot had posted a video of himself driving drunk and sideswiping a car...then his ass would be in serious trouble.


Well, from TFA:  Deputy Chief Brad Johnston says Cox-Brown was charged with failure to perform the duties of a driver. He was not charged with drunken driving because the Facebook post is not sufficient evidence that he was intoxicated.

Seems like a rather vague charge, but I suspect it's akin to leaving the scene of an accident.  How in the world does a FB post professing to have hit a car prove that he in fact hit THAT car?  Seems like a good lawyer ought to be able to make this go away.
 
2013-01-04 01:29:25 PM
Cox-Brown has more than 650 Facebook friends.

Finally, news I can use.
 
2013-01-04 01:30:51 PM
nekom:

Seems like a rather vague charge, but I suspect it's akin to leaving the scene of an accident.  How in the world does a FB post professing to have hit a car prove that he in fact hit THAT car?  Seems like a good lawyer ought to be able to make this go away.

that's what I suspect will happen.  unless the cops have some sort of physical evidence to back up more serious charges...it'll end up being a paperwork drill and likely be dismissed.  there's no 'drunk driving' exception to the first amendment. if you want to go on FB and be a dumbass and say stupid things then well...go right ahead.  absent evidence of criminal activity, it's just facebook ranting and not criminal.
 
2013-01-04 01:38:38 PM
Facebook, like Florida, is now the domain of the demented and stupid.


Well done, Zuckerberg!
 
2013-01-04 01:43:42 PM
Jacob Cox-Brown

Poor kid...at least it's not "Brown-Cox"
 
Pud [TotalFark]
2013-01-04 01:46:47 PM

Weaver95: nekom:

Seems like a rather vague charge, but I suspect it's akin to leaving the scene of an accident.  How in the world does a FB post professing to have hit a car prove that he in fact hit THAT car?  Seems like a good lawyer ought to be able to make this go away.

that's what I suspect will happen.  unless the cops have some sort of physical evidence to back up more serious charges...it'll end up being a paperwork drill and likely be dismissed.  there's no 'drunk driving' exception to the first amendment. if you want to go on FB and be a dumbass and say stupid things then well...go right ahead.  absent evidence of criminal activity, it's just facebook ranting and not criminal.


I read in a different article that there was damage to his car with paint marks matching the 2 other cars he hit. So that'll probably be enough.
 
2013-01-04 01:51:45 PM

nekom: How in the world does a FB post professing to have hit a car prove that he in fact hit THAT car?


It doesn't, but it could put him near the scene at the right time, and then they could compare paint colors exchanged in the collision or match pieces of headlight glass from the ground to his car.

C'mon, man, don't you ever watch Forensic Files?
 
2013-01-04 01:54:50 PM

Lionel Mandrake: It doesn't, but it could put him near the scene at the right time, and then they could compare paint colors exchanged in the collision or match pieces of headlight glass from the ground to his car.

C'mon, man, don't you ever watch Forensic Files?


Actually, if the post is somehow geo-tagged, I suppose it could place him at the scene, if he posted it just after he had hit a car and the post recorded his location.  Even that's a fairly lame case for the prosecution.  And I suppose they COULD actually compare damage between the two vehicles and run some serious forensics on that, but that's the kind of stuff they save for murder cases, not so much pissant hit and run cases.
 
2013-01-04 01:55:46 PM
We really, really need the public stocks brought back. A weekend getting pelted with rotten cabbages would do a lot more to prevent future asspipery.
 
2013-01-04 02:11:00 PM
Kids! I don't know what's wrong with these kids today!
Kids! Why do they post everything they say?
Kids! They are disobedient, status oafs
Tweeting, bumping, insta-graming, loafers!
While we're on the subject:

Kids! You can text and poke till your thumb is blue!
Kids! But they still just post what they should not do!
Why can't they be like we were,
Perfect in every way?
What's the matter with kids today?

Kids! iPhone tried to raise him the best iPhone could
Kids! Kids!
Chatting, texting, liking, apping, morons!
And while we're on the subject!

Kids! They are just impossible to control!
Kids! With their F-M-L  and their L-O-L!

Why can't they dance like we did?
What's wrong with Michael Caine?

What's the matter with kids today!
 
2013-01-04 02:56:04 PM
As I was told in numerous "innocence of muslims" threads,  this is an impossibility.
 
2013-01-04 03:13:18 PM

Mr. Coffee Nerves: We really, really need the public stocks brought back. A weekend getting pelted with rotten cabbages would do a lot more to prevent future asspipery.


We do that digitally now and then said asspipe gets a book deal and a recording contract and a season on dancing with the stars.
 
2013-01-04 03:42:59 PM
I'm at least going to give the kid points for not including YOLO anywhere in his post.
 
2013-01-04 03:43:27 PM
Deputy Chief Brad Johnston says Cox-Brown was charged with failure to perform the duties of a driver. He was not charged with drunken driving because the Facebook post is not sufficient evidence that he was intoxicated.

so a facebook post is sufficient evidence that he sideswiped someone, but not sufficient evidence he was drunk?

Cox-Brown has more than 650 Facebook friends.

News sites are now reporting how many friends we have?  So in addition to charging me with a DUI, they get to embarrass me by divulging how much of a loser I am?
 
2013-01-04 03:45:22 PM
SlothB77:

News sites are now reporting how many friends we have?  So in addition to charging me with a DUI, they get to embarrass me by divulging how much of a loser I am?

I actively discourage people from friending me on facebook.  or following me on twitter.  hell, even from paying attention to me on fark.  even I don't think i've got anything important to say.
 
2013-01-04 04:00:06 PM
Astoria police say officers were investigating a hit and run involving a sideswiped car when two Facebook friends of Jacob Cox-Brown contacted authorities

Cox-Brown has more than 650 Facebook friends.


2 less now.
 
2013-01-04 04:06:19 PM

SlothB77: Deputy Chief Brad Johnston says Cox-Brown was charged with failure to perform the duties of a driver. He was not charged with drunken driving because the Facebook post is not sufficient evidence that he was intoxicated.

so a facebook post is sufficient evidence that he sideswiped someone, but not sufficient evidence he was drunk?

Cox-Brown has more than 650 Facebook friends.

News sites are now reporting how many friends we have?  So in addition to charging me with a DUI, they get to embarrass me by divulging how much of a loser I am?


Wait until your search history is part of every arrest record:
"Given that Mr. Nerves' most recent Google searches included 'Cloris Leachman upskirt,' 'Care Bear Fan Fiction,' 'loneliest man ever' and 'How long do you microwave a pumpkin before you fark it' his DUI arrest is understandable."
 
2013-01-04 04:29:56 PM
Astoria police say officers were investigating a hit and run involving a sideswiped car when two Facebook friends of Jacob Cox-Brown contacted authorities

Some friends you've got there, Brown Cock.
 
2013-01-04 04:33:58 PM

Mr. Coffee Nerves: SlothB77: Deputy Chief Brad Johnston says Cox-Brown was charged with failure to perform the duties of a driver. He was not charged with drunken driving because the Facebook post is not sufficient evidence that he was intoxicated.

so a facebook post is sufficient evidence that he sideswiped someone, but not sufficient evidence he was drunk?

Cox-Brown has more than 650 Facebook friends.

News sites are now reporting how many friends we have?  So in addition to charging me with a DUI, they get to embarrass me by divulging how much of a loser I am?

Wait until your search history is part of every arrest record:
"Given that Mr. Nerves' most recent Google searches included 'Cloris Leachman upskirt,' 'Care Bear Fan Fiction,' 'loneliest man ever' and 'How long do you microwave a pumpkin before you fark it' his DUI arrest is understandable."


In the future, anyone who buys something online between midnight and 4am has their license temporarily suspended for 8 hours.
 
2013-01-04 04:36:51 PM

SlothB77: Deputy Chief Brad Johnston says Cox-Brown was charged with failure to perform the duties of a driver. He was not charged with drunken driving because the Facebook post is not sufficient evidence that he was intoxicated.

so a facebook post is sufficient evidence that he sideswiped someone, but not sufficient evidence he was drunk?

Cox-Brown has more than 650 Facebook friends.

News sites are now reporting how many friends we have?  So in addition to charging me with a DUI, they get to embarrass me by divulging how much of a loser I am?


Just wait until the non-Facebook based news stories start saying "Mr. X had no Facebook account that we could find for more information."
 
2013-01-04 04:39:48 PM

tricycleracer: Astoria police say officers were investigating a hit and run involving a sideswiped car when two Facebook friends of Jacob Cox-Brown contacted authorities

Some friends you've got there, Brown Cock.


So you're saying that reporting someone for driving drunk is the wrong thing to do? I'd rather be friends with people that think drunk driving is wrong and needs to be stopped.
 
2013-01-04 04:40:53 PM
though not enough for a criminal conviction, this information can certainly be forwarded to his insurance and get his ass dropped.
 
2013-01-04 04:43:28 PM

nekom: Weaver95: meh, he'll get a lawyer and that charge will be dropped.  sure, the kid was a dumbass but...facebook posts alone don't prove criminal conduct.  now, if this idiot had posted a video of himself driving drunk and sideswiping a car...then his ass would be in serious trouble.

Well, from TFA:  Deputy Chief Brad Johnston says Cox-Brown was charged with failure to perform the duties of a driver. He was not charged with drunken driving because the Facebook post is not sufficient evidence that he was intoxicated.

Seems like a rather vague charge, but I suspect it's akin to leaving the scene of an accident.  How in the world does a FB post professing to have hit a car prove that he in fact hit THAT car?  Seems like a good lawyer ought to be able to make this go away.


They immediately show up at his house, take pictures, and paint samples of the damaged car, and compare them to the car that was hit and run.

That, indeed, would hold up in court, if need be.

As it stands, as long as his insurance company ponies up, that will likely be the end of it.
 
2013-01-04 04:43:41 PM

nekom: Weaver95: meh, he'll get a lawyer and that charge will be dropped.  sure, the kid was a dumbass but...facebook posts alone don't prove criminal conduct.  now, if this idiot had posted a video of himself driving drunk and sideswiping a car...then his ass would be in serious trouble.

Well, from TFA:  Deputy Chief Brad Johnston says Cox-Brown was charged with failure to perform the duties of a driver. He was not charged with drunken driving because the Facebook post is not sufficient evidence that he was intoxicated.

Seems like a rather vague charge, but I suspect it's akin to leaving the scene of an accident.  How in the world does a FB post professing to have hit a car prove that he in fact hit THAT car?  Seems like a good lawyer ought to be able to make this go away.


Well, you probably start with police reports of hit & runs that night.  Then you can probably track down the address of the kid that was outed to see if there was any damage to his vehicle suggesting that he was indeed in a collision.  Then you can attempt to match the patterns of damage on the cars, possibly see if matching paint chips were present.  Then you arrest him.  You know, classic police work.
 
2013-01-04 04:44:50 PM
Dude needs more friends like Carmelo Anthony - then there would be no snitchen
 
2013-01-04 04:47:24 PM
Ahhh the evils of drinking. Perhaps we should make drinking against the law, then this would never have happened.

Then again, neither would this:

ts1.mm.bing.net
 
2013-01-04 04:47:31 PM

SuperChuck: So you're saying that reporting someone for driving drunk is the wrong thing to do?


I'm saying that if people called the cops on me for every joke I made online regarding fictional illegal behavior, I'd never get to leave the interrogation room.
 
2013-01-04 04:47:38 PM
Finally, attention-whoring has begun to have consequences. As long as your "friends" rat you out.
 
2013-01-04 04:48:18 PM

Sybarite: I'm at least going to give the kid points for not including YOLO anywhere in his post.


Toats
 
2013-01-04 04:50:00 PM

BSABSVR: As I was told in numerous "innocence of muslims" threads,  this is an impossibility.


Wrong thread, I take it?
 
2013-01-04 04:51:02 PM
Well legal outcomes aside, at this rate the kid won't be long for this earth anyway.
 
2013-01-04 04:51:12 PM
First saw the post on Reddit in the face palm subreddit. Then a friend from Oregon forwarded the story. Now it's on Fark

It's the circle of life!
 
2013-01-04 04:51:46 PM
"You're under arrest!   :-o   :-P   ;-)  "
 
2013-01-04 04:54:10 PM

Pud: Weaver95: nekom:

Seems like a rather vague charge, but I suspect it's akin to leaving the scene of an accident.  How in the world does a FB post professing to have hit a car prove that he in fact hit THAT car?  Seems like a good lawyer ought to be able to make this go away.

that's what I suspect will happen.  unless the cops have some sort of physical evidence to back up more serious charges...it'll end up being a paperwork drill and likely be dismissed.  there's no 'drunk driving' exception to the first amendment. if you want to go on FB and be a dumbass and say stupid things then well...go right ahead.  absent evidence of criminal activity, it's just facebook ranting and not criminal.

I read in a different article that there was damage to his car with paint marks matching the 2 other cars he hit. So that'll probably be enough.


Yeah, I was figuring that.

I searched a parking lot of about 100 cars and found the one that hit my car then got the guys insurance to pay one time.

Yay.
 
2013-01-04 04:55:16 PM

SlothB77: Deputy Chief Brad Johnston says Cox-Brown was charged with failure to perform the duties of a driver. He was not charged with drunken driving because the Facebook post is not sufficient evidence that he was intoxicated.

so a facebook post is sufficient evidence that he sideswiped someone, but not sufficient evidence he was drunk?


Nope, not at all. A Feacebook post creates reasonable suspicion. An investigation into the crash - two struck cars, and damage and paint matching on his car - creates probable cause to arrest. There is no evidence to create probable cause for the DUI.
 
2013-01-04 04:56:18 PM

codenamewizard: Ahhh the evils of drinking. Perhaps we should make drinking against the law, then this would never have happened.

Then again, neither would this:


I love that pic.
 
2013-01-04 04:56:27 PM

Mr. Coffee Nerves: Mr. Nerves' most recent Google searches included 'Cloris Leachman upskirt,'


`O_0)
 
2013-01-04 04:58:42 PM
See, this it's why you don't drunk Facebook

/in fact, don't drunk anything, except pass out
 
2013-01-04 04:58:50 PM

ultraholland: though not enough for a criminal conviction, this information can certainly be forwarded to his insurance and get his ass dropped.


Also it ensures that any cop who tags for a moving violation in the near future won't cut him any slack. I know a dumb shiat who bragged about getting away with 50 in a 25 (in a residential area). Cops played it off like it was no big deal and they couldn't do anything. A month later after the moron felt secure he was back to speeding and when an unmarked unit popped his ass, there was no mercy.
 
2013-01-04 05:02:22 PM

PsiChick: BSABSVR: As I was told in numerous "innocence of muslims" threads,  this is an impossibility.

Wrong thread, I take it?


Xenophobia fits ANYWHERE!!!
 
2013-01-04 05:03:30 PM

ultraholland: though not enough for a criminal conviction, this information can certainly be forwarded to his insurance and get his ass dropped.


And having to deal with cops and lawyers for a while might just slow his drunk ass down. Probably not, but you never know.
 
2013-01-04 05:03:42 PM
NO NO NO. This cannot be allowed to stand. This sort of thing is a capital offense. When will people wake up and realized that this is NOT okay!?

It's "whomever".
 
2013-01-04 05:05:35 PM

Lionel Mandrake: Jacob Cox-Brown

Poor kid...at least it's not "Brown-Cox"


It will be when he drops the soap
 
2013-01-04 05:11:47 PM
Moved to Astoria 5 months ago, it's like 1987 here. I'm suprised the kid had facebook.
 
2013-01-04 05:14:45 PM

ha-ha-guy: ultraholland: though not enough for a criminal conviction, this information can certainly be forwarded to his insurance and get his ass dropped.

Also it ensures that any cop who tags for a moving violation in the near future won't cut him any slack. I know a dumb shiat who bragged about getting away with 50 in a 25 (in a residential area). Cops played it off like it was no big deal and they couldn't do anything. A month later after the moron felt secure he was back to speeding and when an unmarked unit popped his ass, there was no mercy.


There's this. Cops and judges have long memories and no sense of humor.

Also, this kid is 18 and probably still on daddy's insurance. If this info gets forwarded to DADDY'S insurance, and daddy's rates skyrocket, daddy may not find it too funny, either.
 
2013-01-04 05:14:46 PM
GIS for Cloris Leachman Upskirt

t3.gstatic.com

hot?
 
2013-01-04 05:16:28 PM
"Classic"?
 
2013-01-04 05:18:38 PM

Seacop: Moved to Astoria 5 months ago, it's like 1987 here. I'm suprised the kid had facebook.


More like 1985, am I right!?

Link
 
2013-01-04 05:19:53 PM

No Time To Explain: See, this it's why you don't drunk Facebook

/in fact, don't drunk anything, except pass out


Are you drunk now?  Drunkin' farking is where it's at!

/I don't mean actually being on Fark.
 
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