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(Huffington Post)   Ex-gay porn star claims that gay men anally give birth to the devil after a hard night of pounding the ring of fire   (huffingtonpost.com) divider line 134
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14026 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Jan 2013 at 9:20 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-01-04 09:22:56 AM  
Santorum is the devil?
 
2013-01-04 09:22:56 AM  
When I have anal sex with other men, I always wear a condom.
 
2013-01-04 09:23:08 AM  
"Ex gay."

Reminds me of a guy who Howard Stern interviewed. He is / was apparently one of the biggest names in gay porn, as of like 5 or 6 years ago when the interview was, anyway.

His whole thing was "I'm not gay since I only fark other guys and never take it." Claimed he was completely straight. Might be on Youtube somewhere.
 
2013-01-04 09:23:15 AM  
Mental illness. Why can't we just call it what it is? Religion gets a free pass?
 
2013-01-04 09:23:27 AM  
Not just for homosexuals...
www.vh1.com
 
2013-01-04 09:27:07 AM  
I had anal sex with my bf last night. I'm about to hit the can in a minute. Will let you guys know what happens.
 
2013-01-04 09:27:43 AM  
Don't they?
 
2013-01-04 09:27:48 AM  
You can take the gay out of the man, but you can't take the gay fashion off the man.
 
2013-01-04 09:28:08 AM  
Omg the religious right was correct!!!!
 
2013-01-04 09:28:11 AM  
Same problem after a night of spicy Indian food. Just keep a extra roll of tolet paper handy. No need to make a federal case out of it.
 
2013-01-04 09:28:35 AM  

topcon: "Ex gay."

Reminds me of a guy who Howard Stern interviewed. He is / was apparently one of the biggest names in gay porn, as of like 5 or 6 years ago when the interview was, anyway.

His whole thing was "I'm not gay since I only fark other guys and never take it." Claimed he was completely straight. Might be on Youtube somewhere.


I hear that's a common rationale in the Middle East too.
 
2013-01-04 09:28:39 AM  
In addition to his numerous videos on the subject of gay sex and Christianity, Sciambra has also been keeping a blog called "How Our Lord Jesus Christ Saved Me From Homosexuality, Pornography, and the Occult."

bender_irony.jpg
 
2013-01-04 09:30:32 AM  

Buttknuckle: I had anal sex with my bf last night. I'm about to hit the can in a minute. Will let you guys know what happens.


I suggest flushing with holy water.
 
2013-01-04 09:30:33 AM  
I thought evil sprang from the hearts of greedy, violent old men.

agitprop.typepad.com

Unless they're packing a pacemaker.
 
2013-01-04 09:32:50 AM  
Paging RugbyJock to thread #7517232...
 
2013-01-04 09:33:49 AM  
I usually anally give birth to the devil after drinking Hamm's and eating Taco Burrito King.
 
2013-01-04 09:35:48 AM  

fozziewazzi: topcon: "Ex gay."

Reminds me of a guy who Howard Stern interviewed. He is / was apparently one of the biggest names in gay porn, as of like 5 or 6 years ago when the interview was, anyway.

His whole thing was "I'm not gay since I only fark other guys and never take it." Claimed he was completely straight. Might be on Youtube somewhere.

I hear that's a common rationale in the Middle East too.


Same rationale with a lot of "macho" populations who still like the gay sex.
 
2013-01-04 09:36:12 AM  
Gay men eat at Taco Bell??

I would think that would be counter-productive, but whatever heats your hot dog I guess.
 
Slu
2013-01-04 09:36:42 AM  
Obvious tag out to lunch?

In all seriousness, why is everyone a porn "star"? Nobody is just a porn actor. If nobody knows you are, you are not a star. There have been like 5 real porn stars.
 
2013-01-04 09:37:36 AM  
Was this the answer to a question? Who asked it? Why? WHY?
 
2013-01-04 09:37:38 AM  
Yep, still lisping.
 
2013-01-04 09:38:09 AM  
I'll say this, I'm buying the stitched up part.

The devil thing, not so much....
 
2013-01-04 09:39:13 AM  

wellreadneck: Yep, still lisping.


What is that, like a gay accent?
 
2013-01-04 09:39:33 AM  
Easy, just call Bob Larson to perform a Gay Demon Exorcism(tm).
Warning: this video is disturbing, as in 'can lower your IQ' disturbing.
 
2013-01-04 09:41:11 AM  
Porn stars who find Jeebus are always the funniest to me. "Sure I spent ten years getting pounded like a roofing nail and made a damn good living off it, but deep down I always knew it was evil."
 
2013-01-04 09:41:29 AM  

Buttknuckle: I had anal sex with my bf last night. I'm about to hit the can in a minute. Will let you guys know what happens.


He hasn't reported back!

SATAN LIVES!
 
2013-01-04 09:42:14 AM  
So what do us queer girls who take it in the butt from their gf's strap-on give birth to?

He did specifically call out the penis-- he said nothing about strap-ons, various produce...

I'm only asking because I think a demon or two could really spice up my home decor.
 
2013-01-04 09:44:20 AM  

Snort: Buttknuckle: I had anal sex with my bf last night. I'm about to hit the can in a minute. Will let you guys know what happens.

He hasn't reported back!



It's only been 20 minutes! Birthing the Devil takes time.
 
2013-01-04 09:44:25 AM  

vudukungfu: wellreadneck: Yep, still lisping.

What is that, like a gay accent?


Yeth.
 
2013-01-04 09:44:34 AM  
So when a guy asks for anal and says "come on, baby, you'll learn to like it", is that the devil speaking?
 
2013-01-04 09:45:26 AM  

Transpogue: So what do us queer girls who take it in the butt from their gf's strap-on give birth to?


Rainbows, puppies, and goodness... especially if the proceedings are videotaped and disseminated across teh intertubes.
 
2013-01-04 09:47:21 AM  

Snort: Buttknuckle: I had anal sex with my bf last night. I'm about to hit the can in a minute. Will let you guys know what happens.

He hasn't reported back!

SATAN LIVES!


Sorry it took so long. Had a hostage situation in there. However...
It was only poop! No demons for me.
 
2013-01-04 09:50:09 AM  
Man, this thread has put me right off my Heinz Curry Beans, couscous, falafel, tandoor bread and ice cold Coke. The breakfast of fat champions.
 
2013-01-04 09:50:28 AM  

Buttknuckle: Snort: Buttknuckle: I had anal sex with my bf last night. I'm about to hit the can in a minute. Will let you guys know what happens.

He hasn't reported back!

SATAN LIVES!

Sorry it took so long. Had a hostage situation in there. However...
It was only poop! No demons for me.


Damn sodomy demons... they always try to get you when you least expect it.
 
2013-01-04 09:50:29 AM  

Buttknuckle: Snort: Buttknuckle: I had anal sex with my bf last night. I'm about to hit the can in a minute. Will let you guys know what happens.

He hasn't reported back!

SATAN LIVES!

Sorry it took so long. Had a hostage situation in there. However...
It was only poop! No demons for me.


How do you know the poop itself wasn't a demon?
 
2013-01-04 09:50:53 AM  

Transpogue: So what do us queer girls who take it in the butt from their gf's strap-on give birth to?

He did specifically call out the penis-- he said nothing about strap-ons, various produce...

I'm only asking because I think a demon or two could really spice up my home decor.


how you doin' ?
 
2013-01-04 09:50:57 AM  
He used to be the Boy Named Sue.
 
2013-01-04 09:52:48 AM  

AntonChigger: Buttknuckle: Snort: Buttknuckle: I had anal sex with my bf last night. I'm about to hit the can in a minute. Will let you guys know what happens.

He hasn't reported back!

SATAN LIVES!

Sorry it took so long. Had a hostage situation in there. However...
It was only poop! No demons for me.

How do you know the poop itself wasn't a demon?


i212.photobucket.com
 
2013-01-04 09:55:04 AM  

Transpogue: So what do us queer girls who take it in the butt from their gf's strap-on give birth to?

He did specifically call out the penis-- he said nothing about strap-ons, various produce...

I'm only asking because I think a demon or two could really spice up my home decor.


Wait! Where was lesbian butt sex on "Will and Grace"? Did I miss an episode?
 
2013-01-04 09:55:42 AM  

Slu: In all seriousness, why is everyone a porn "star"? Nobody is just a porn actor. If nobody knows you are, you are not a star. There have been like 5 real porn stars.


I can name 5 porn stars:

Aldebaran (popular with size queens), Sirius (who can turn down some hot twin action), Arcturus (the S&M star.... she wears kinky booties), Regulus (gay for pay), and PSR J0437-4715.
 
2013-01-04 09:56:11 AM  

topcon: fozziewazzi: topcon: "Ex gay."

Reminds me of a guy who Howard Stern interviewed. He is / was apparently one of the biggest names in gay porn, as of like 5 or 6 years ago when the interview was, anyway.

His whole thing was "I'm not gay since I only fark other guys and never take it." Claimed he was completely straight. Might be on Youtube somewhere.

I hear that's a common rationale in the Middle East too.

Same rationale with a lot of "macho" populations who still like the gay sex.


I always thought giving it would be MORE gay since you have to keep your dick hard looking at a hairy male ass, that alone would kill it for me and the fact men, for the most part do not smell as pretty as women.

I guess the whole hair thing is irrelevant since razors have gotten better or waxing......
 
2013-01-04 09:56:36 AM  

Buttknuckle: Snort: Buttknuckle: I had anal sex with my bf last night. I'm about to hit the can in a minute. Will let you guys know what happens.

He hasn't reported back!

SATAN LIVES!

Sorry it took so long. Had a hostage situation in there. However...
It was only poop! No demons for me.


Those are lies made by the homosexual agenda. Pay no attention, people!
The devil just ran away before he could snap a pic.
 
2013-01-04 09:56:42 AM  

FirstNationalBastard: Transpogue: So what do us queer girls who take it in the butt from their gf's strap-on give birth to?

Rainbows, puppies, and goodness... especially if the proceedings are videotaped and disseminated across teh intertubes.


Haha, you said seminated.
 
2013-01-04 09:58:11 AM  
Not born. shiat into existence.
 
2013-01-04 09:58:20 AM  
Yeah, the eye and hand twitches and the speech patterns kind of go with the delusions. Anyone with a diagnosed schizophrenic relative should recognize the pattern.
 
2013-01-04 09:58:53 AM  

Transpogue: So what do us queer girls who take it in the butt from their gf's strap-on give birth to?

He did specifically call out the penis-- he said nothing about strap-ons, various produce...

I'm only asking because I think a demon or two could really spice up my home decor.


Pffffft crazy lesbians, thinking they are equal even if they don't have a man, the male genome is always better!
 
2013-01-04 10:00:06 AM  
Oddly enough I know a guy who was in a Catholic seminary, decided he was having a crisis of faith from partying and drinking, and decided to become a priest.

Anyway he was talking to his priest mentor and the priest told he he had a demon inside of him and the only way to get it out was through his anus, and since the priest had experience with exorcisms he would make the great sacrifice to put his priestly penis in this young acolytes anus, and fark the devil out of him.  It was the only way.

My friend went back to drinking and whoring.
 
2013-01-04 10:02:15 AM  

Transpogue: So what do us queer girls who take it in the butt from their gf's strap-on give birth to?

He did specifically call out the penis-- he said nothing about strap-ons, various produce...

I'm only asking because I think a demon or two could really spice up my home decor.


Fapping.
 
2013-01-04 10:03:23 AM  

theflatline: Oddly enough I know a guy who was in a Catholic seminary, decided he was having a crisis of faith from partying and drinking, and decided to become a priest.

Anyway he was talking to his priest mentor and the priest told he he had a demon inside of him and the only way to get it out was through his anus, and since the priest had experience with exorcisms he would make the great sacrifice to put his priestly penis in this young acolytes anus, and fark the devil out of him.  It was the only way.

My friend went back to drinking and whoring.


Not a Catholic, and I know 99% of Catholics aren't like this, but what the fark man
 
2013-01-04 10:05:51 AM  
Satan's Sodomy Baby

/obscure?
 
2013-01-04 10:06:20 AM  

Transpogue: So what do us queer girls who take it in the butt from their gf's strap-on give birth to?

He did specifically call out the penis-- he said nothing about strap-ons, various produce...

I'm only asking because I think a demon or two could really spice up my home decor.


kithfans.com
 
2013-01-04 10:10:48 AM  
What does a slutty gym sock give birth to? I need to know how to set up the nursery room.
 
2013-01-04 10:12:19 AM  

Devolving_Spud: What does a slutty gym sock give birth to? I need to know how to set up the nursery room.


i6.photobucket.com
 
2013-01-04 10:12:26 AM  
anal sex is filthy
 
2013-01-04 10:13:00 AM  

soakitincider: anal sex is filthy


Not if you clean yourself out first.
 
2013-01-04 10:14:24 AM  
Good sex can make your whole week

Good anal sex can make your hole weak

hahahaha

At least the guy is not afraid to bend down to get the soap...
 
2013-01-04 10:14:30 AM  
What's he got to say about cream pies?
 
2013-01-04 10:14:53 AM  
Oh lordy, the guy's blog, linked to in TFA, is a riot.
 
2013-01-04 10:18:26 AM  
Recently introduced to a guy, London
who also does teh ghey pron
he says he's straight, the movies say otherwise.
I don't get the gay fer pay stuff. If you enjoy a flounder and some box, yer bi.
Nothing wrong with it.

My lass really likes the vid of two ts seduction gals lacing into him.
and I dig anything that makes her sassy
 
2013-01-04 10:19:42 AM  

Buttknuckle: Snort: Buttknuckle: I had anal sex with my bf last night. I'm about to hit the can in a minute. Will let you guys know what happens.

He hasn't reported back!

SATAN LIVES!

Sorry it took so long. Had a hostage situation in there. However...
It was only poop! No demons for me.


So you take a poop after a night of vicious butt pounding....
Did it look like this?
blogs.miaminewtimes.com
 
2013-01-04 10:20:15 AM  

Transpogue: So what do us queer girls who take it in the butt from their gf's strap-on give birth to?

He did specifically call out the penis-- he said nothing about strap-ons, various produce...

I'm only asking because I think a demon or two could really spice up my home decor.


Probably just a fallen angel, since you're not wasting any sacred, holy, life-giving semen.

If you're really looking for a demon try having a gay guy put on headphones and face the wall while you and your GF go all out, and you might be able to trick God into putting a demon in one of your lower intestines with his proximity.
Or try smashing samples from a sperm bank against the wall....or...something?

/How do religious people envisage this happening anyway?
 
2013-01-04 10:21:41 AM  

AntonChigger: theflatline: Oddly enough I know a guy who was in a Catholic seminary, decided he was having a crisis of faith from partying and drinking, and decided to become a priest.

Anyway he was talking to his priest mentor and the priest told he he had a demon inside of him and the only way to get it out was through his anus, and since the priest had experience with exorcisms he would make the great sacrifice to put his priestly penis in this young acolytes anus, and fark the devil out of him.  It was the only way.

My friend went back to drinking and whoring.

Not a Catholic, and I know 99% of Catholics aren't like this, but what the fark man


Hahahaha.  Catholics sin, then go to confession, clean slate it and sin again.  Church is the best place to meet sluts.
 
2013-01-04 10:21:52 AM  

soakitincider: anal sex is filthy


Fortunately for you, about half of sexually active gay men agree with you and don't participate in it. So you should have no problem finding suckbuddies.
 
2013-01-04 10:22:22 AM  
Only watched the video to see what the scuttlebutt was about. I said wut, wut?
 
2013-01-04 10:23:38 AM  
it smelt like i gave birth to the devil earlier this morning.
 
2013-01-04 10:24:45 AM  

natas6.0: Recently introduced to a guy, London
who also does teh ghey pron
he says he's straight, the movies say otherwise.
I don't get the gay fer pay stuff. If you enjoy a flounder and some box, yer bi.
Nothing wrong with it.

My lass really likes the vid of two ts seduction gals lacing into him.
and I dig anything that makes her sassy


That post seems to be in English, yet, remains largely incomprehensible.
 
2013-01-04 10:24:46 AM  

MythDragon: Buttknuckle: Snort: Buttknuckle: I had anal sex with my bf last night. I'm about to hit the can in a minute. Will let you guys know what happens.

He hasn't reported back!

SATAN LIVES!

Sorry it took so long. Had a hostage situation in there. However...
It was only poop! No demons for me.

So you take a poop after a night of vicious butt pounding....
Did it look like this?
[blogs.miaminewtimes.com image 500x375]


dude, how about a nsfw next time
 
2013-01-04 10:25:38 AM  
Just keep three tiger cubs around to preform the abortion.

southparkstudios.mtvnimages.com
 
2013-01-04 10:30:10 AM  

ObscureNameHere: natas6.0: Recently introduced to a guy, London
who also does teh ghey pron
he says he's straight, the movies say otherwise.
I don't get the gay fer pay stuff. If you enjoy a flounder and some box, yer bi.
Nothing wrong with it.

My lass really likes the vid of two ts seduction gals lacing into him.
and I dig anything that makes her sassy

That post seems to be in English, yet, remains largely incomprehensible.


Makes sense, gay guys denying the fact they're gay.

Saw a documentary about the porn industry which had gay porn with self described "straight" men, the GF and I agreed that if you take, receive, suck then at the least you're BI. But all these guys insisted they're 100% straight and only doing it for the money, what's even weirder their GFs were on the set saying the same thing.
 
2013-01-04 10:33:25 AM  
i141.photobucket.com

Foul demon!
 
2013-01-04 10:34:08 AM  
Peter North?
 
2013-01-04 10:35:05 AM  

WTF Indeed: You can take the gay out of the man, but you can't take the gay fashion off the man.


At least give them a heads up!
image8.spreadshirt.com
 
2013-01-04 10:43:17 AM  

Slu: Obvious tag out to lunch?

In all seriousness, why is everyone a porn "star"? Nobody is just a porn actor. If nobody knows you are, you are not a star. There have been like 5 real porn stars.


Hmm. Real female porn stars:

Marilyn Chambers
Nina Hartley
Ginger Lynn
Jenna Jameson
Sasha Grey

Real male porn stars:

Ron Jeremy
John Holmes
 
2013-01-04 10:44:50 AM  

steamingpile: ObscureNameHere: natas6.0: Recently introduced to a guy, London
who also does teh ghey pron
he says he's straight, the movies say otherwise.
I don't get the gay fer pay stuff. If you enjoy a flounder and some box, yer bi.
Nothing wrong with it.

My lass really likes the vid of two ts seduction gals lacing into him.
and I dig anything that makes her sassy

That post seems to be in English, yet, remains largely incomprehensible.

Makes sense, gay guys denying the fact they're gay.

Saw a documentary about the porn industry which had gay porn with self described "straight" men, the GF and I agreed that if you take, receive, suck then at the least you're BI. But all these guys insisted they're 100% straight and only doing it for the money, what's even weirder their GFs were on the set saying the same thing.


Pfft. I've seen Tom Cruise kiss lots of women in movies. He ain't foolin me

/acting!
 
2013-01-04 10:47:52 AM  
Looks like somebody farked his brains out
 
2013-01-04 11:08:19 AM  
It's pretty easy to tell who is easily deluded, twisted by the world.

This guy in TFA is example #1. I used to be surprised and amazed by these people, and intrigued by how they came to be who they are. Now, I just thank my lucky stars I'm nothing like them. I would ignore them, if they were weren't so dangerous to OTHER easily deluded people.
 
2013-01-04 11:08:41 AM  

HailRobonia: Slu: In all seriousness, why is everyone a porn "star"? Nobody is just a porn actor. If nobody knows you are, you are not a star. There have been like 5 real porn stars.

I can name 5 porn stars:

Aldebaran (popular with size queens), Sirius (who can turn down some hot twin action), Arcturus (the S&M star.... she wears kinky booties), Regulus (gay for pay), and PSR J0437-4715.


cache.ohinternet.com
 
2013-01-04 11:09:16 AM  

Lawnchair: soakitincider: anal sex is filthy

Fortunately for you, about half of sexually active gay men agree with you and don't participate in it. So you should have no problem finding suckbuddies.


Really? Half? This is news to me...
 
2013-01-04 11:14:08 AM  

FirstNationalBastard: Devolving_Spud: What does a slutty gym sock give birth to? I need to know how to set up the nursery room.

[i6.photobucket.com image 609x359]


That hand's dad had the heavyweight belt last year, he's practically royalty.

Tyrone Slothrop: Slu: Obvious tag out to lunch?

In all seriousness, why is everyone a porn "star"? Nobody is just a porn actor. If nobody knows you are, you are not a star. There have been like 5 real porn stars.

Hmm. Real female porn stars:

Marilyn Chambers
Nina Hartley
Ginger Lynn
Jenna Jameson
Sasha Grey

Real male porn stars:

Ron Jeremy
John Holmes


Lex Steele? Mandingo? Brothas don't get no love (hell of a lot more sex than myself though)
 
2013-01-04 11:16:13 AM  
So is he formerly gay or formerly a porn star?
 
2013-01-04 11:17:19 AM  
It's actually just as good as any other myth on the creation of gods or demons.
 
2013-01-04 11:19:40 AM  
Sounds like he's doing gay all wrong.
 
2013-01-04 11:27:53 AM  
He's a "porn star" the same way half the girls in junior high were in 1998. Like how wearing a Flash t-shirt makes you the fastest man alive.

/I don't think that came out right.
 
2013-01-04 11:28:59 AM  

Neverhood9: Really? Half? This is news to me...


About three-in-four gay men have tried anal sex (one side or the other), but only about 55% or so do so regularly (within the last year). Being gay and not terribly liking buttsex is not uncommon, anyway.
 
2013-01-04 11:30:37 AM  

hockeychick: Transpogue: So what do us queer girls who take it in the butt from their gf's strap-on give birth to?

He did specifically call out the penis-- he said nothing about strap-ons, various produce...

I'm only asking because I think a demon or two could really spice up my home decor.

[kithfans.com image 507x333]


Any reference to Kids in the Hall is auto fav on Fark.
 
2013-01-04 11:39:55 AM  

Lawnchair

Neverhood9: Really? Half? This is news to me...

About three-in-four gay men have tried anal sex (one side or the other), but only about 55% or so do so regularly (within the last year). Being gay and not terribly liking buttsex is not uncommon, anyway.



Seems if I were a gay man I would feel the same about this as a girl who doesn't do oral.
 
2013-01-04 11:42:58 AM  

Transpogue: He did specifically call out the penis-- he said nothing about strap-ons, various produce...


ecx.images-amazon.com
 
2013-01-04 11:46:58 AM  

Lawnchair: soakitincider: anal sex is filthy

Fortunately for you, about half of sexually active gay men agree with you and don't participate in it. So you should have no problem finding suckbuddies.


Yeah, and a lot of the gay guys who do participate in that don't do so frequently. It's not analogousness to vaginal sex with straight people.
 
2013-01-04 11:47:52 AM  

TeddyRooseveltsMustache: So is he formerly gay or formerly a porn star?


Actually, both (so he claims). So, the headline is correct whichever way you decide to interpret it.
 
2013-01-04 11:52:29 AM  
He goes on to claim that doing gay porn resulted in having to have his "sphincters almost stitched shut."

Was he was screwing gay horses 6 days a week? I know there's a limit to how much a sphincter can stretch and return to its former shape, but geez.
 
2013-01-04 11:54:33 AM  

miss diminutive: He goes on to claim that doing gay porn resulted in having to have his "sphincters almost stitched shut."

Was he was screwing gay horses 6 days a week? I know there's a limit to how much a sphincter can stretch and return to its former shape, but geez.


His act may have involved spinning on a traffic cone.
 
2013-01-04 12:04:09 PM  

steamingpile: Saw a documentary about the porn industry which had gay porn with self described "straight" men, the GF and I agreed that if you take, receive, suck then at the least you're BI. But all these guys insisted they're 100% straight and only doing it for the money, what's even weirder their GFs were on the set saying the same thing.


Not that I don't believe them and all, but surely there's got to be an easier way to make $200? I mean, are you really that pressed for time that 2 hours of getting pounded in the butt by another man is preferable to, say, an 8 hour shift waiting tables?
 
2013-01-04 12:05:37 PM  
I'll just drop this here....

Gerbil Rocket

(1997 - 1998) "In retrospect, lighting the match was my big mistake. But I was only trying to save the gerbil," Eric Tomaszewski told the bemused doctors in the Severe Burns Unit of Salt Lake City Hospital. Tomaszewski and his homosexual partner, Andrew "Kiki" Farnum, had been admitted for emergency treatment after a felching session had gone seriously wrong.

"I pushed a cardboard toilet paper tube up his rectum and slipped Ragout, our gerbil, in," he explained. "As usual, Kiki shouted out 'Armageddon,' my cue that he'd had reached nirvana, so to speak. I tried to retrieve Raggot but he simply would not come out, so I peered into the tube and struck a match, thinking the light might attract him."

At a hushed press conference, a hospital spokesman desribed what happened next.

"The match ignited a pocket of intestinal methane gas in Kiki's colon. Flames shot out the tube, ignited Mr. Tomaszewski's hair and severely burning his face. It also set fire to the gerbil's fur and whiskers, causing it to scurry further up Kiki's colon, which in turn ignited a larger pocket of gas further up the intestine, propelling the rodent out of the cardboard tube like a cannonball."

Tomaszewski suffered second degree burns and a broken nose from the impact of the gerbil, while Farnum suffered first and second degree burns to his anus and lower intestinal tract.

Sadly, Ragout the gerbil did not survive the incident.
 
2013-01-04 12:08:03 PM  
Yeah, I remember reading about demonic birth via the anus in a recent New England Journal of Medicine.

It's science, people.
 
2013-01-04 12:08:19 PM  
Was this Demon's name Proteus?

/how is that for obscure?
 
2013-01-04 12:08:28 PM  

Just Another OC Homeless Guy: I'll just drop this here....

Gerbil Rocket

(1997 - 1998) "In retrospect, lighting the match was my big mistake. But I was only trying to save the gerbil," Eric Tomaszewski told the bemused doctors in the Severe Burns Unit of Salt Lake City Hospital. Tomaszewski and his homosexual partner, Andrew "Kiki" Farnum, had been admitted for emergency treatment after a felching session had gone seriously wrong.

"I pushed a cardboard toilet paper tube up his rectum and slipped Ragout, our gerbil, in," he explained. "As usual, Kiki shouted out 'Armageddon,' my cue that he'd had reached nirvana, so to speak. I tried to retrieve Raggot but he simply would not come out, so I peered into the tube and struck a match, thinking the light might attract him."

At a hushed press conference, a hospital spokesman desribed what happened next.

"The match ignited a pocket of intestinal methane gas in Kiki's colon. Flames shot out the tube, ignited Mr. Tomaszewski's hair and severely burning his face. It also set fire to the gerbil's fur and whiskers, causing it to scurry further up Kiki's colon, which in turn ignited a larger pocket of gas further up the intestine, propelling the rodent out of the cardboard tube like a cannonball."

Tomaszewski suffered second degree burns and a broken nose from the impact of the gerbil, while Farnum suffered first and second degree burns to his anus and lower intestinal tract.

Sadly, Ragout the gerbil did not survive the incident.


So... always remember to use a flashlight, not matches, when peering into the anus of a loved one?
 
2013-01-04 12:10:53 PM  

FirstNationalBastard: TeddyRooseveltsMustache: So is he formerly gay or formerly a porn star?

Actually, both (so he claims). So, the headline is correct whichever way you decide to interpret it.


So it should be "ex-gay, ex-porn star."

Because he's totally not gay anymore. Flushed that demon right down. Loves him some women now, especially Liza Minnelli.
 
2013-01-04 12:18:29 PM  

Transpogue: So what do us queer girls who take it in the butt from their gf's strap-on give birth to?

He did specifically call out the penis-- he said nothing about strap-ons, various produce...

I'm only asking because I think a demon or two could really spice up my home decor.


I'm pretty sure that lesbo buttsecks is demon-free (sorry!) but the queefs resulting from girl on girl fisting materialize into those evil shadow spirity things that you see taking away the corporate asshole at the end of the movie Ghost.
 
2013-01-04 12:57:24 PM  
www.wnd.com

Approves.
 
2013-01-04 01:08:32 PM  
Sooo ... that's what the Araba have been up to all this time.....
 
2013-01-04 01:16:25 PM  

gilatrout: Santorum is the devil?


You have won all the Intenets! Please send Fark an address to which the mods can deliver your prize. Your prize includes not only the regular www, but www1, www2, www 3, the Deep Web and the triple x porn-only internet. It does not include the unreleased movies and live blacked-out sport events web. That costs extra.
 
2013-01-04 01:37:18 PM  

Lawnchair: Yeah, the eye and hand twitches and the speech patterns kind of go with the delusions. Anyone with a diagnosed schizophrenic relative should recognize the pattern.


...Hunh. I didn't watch the vid and thought someone just paid him to be an idiot. But damn, that sucks, I hope he gets treatment. :(
 
2013-01-04 01:39:50 PM  
Giving birth to Satan due to sodomy? If that were true we would be overrun with little baby Satans, abandoned on the streets & filling our shelters. Thorazine- the guy merely needs thorazine
 
2013-01-04 01:44:12 PM  
When I was a child I attended a Pentecostal Sunday School because my liberal church had no Sunday School and my parents insisted on getting us kids out of the house for a couple of hours for some reason.

Pentecostals practice public confession.

Prize confessions were rock 'n' roll, alcoholism, and dabbling in the Satanic Arts of Ouiji and comic books, etc. In other words, being a normal working class or lower middle class teenager. Being only a small, poor congregation, they could only afford the occasional Converted Satanist.

This Worn Out Pron Star would be a prize catch and could make a good living out of doing the rubber-necking Tent Revival circuit or as the prize Repetent Sinner of a larger suburban church or Mega-Church Inc.

His ridiculous claim (that the Devil is born via the anuses of fornicating homosexuals--and heterosexuals?) sounds just like the article in question. His claim that he had to have his ripped anus sewn up is plausible and also very probable. I expect it is the main reason he gave up acting, that and visibly hitting 40.

Any hoo, I can't think of public confession without thinking of Jean-Paul Sartre's quip in Les Mouches (The Flies) about the dangers of inquiring after the sins that Protestant sinners do NOT confess publically.

For example, even when I was eight years old I was not ignorant or dumb enough to realize that the guy who was making a show of confessing his drinking and smoking was leaving out the well-known fact that his pickup truck was parked in a neighbour's drive way when the neighbour was out of town.

Alcoholism, being a pecadillo and almost universal failing among Pentecostal converts and many born Pentecostals and evangelicals of all stripes, is fair game for confession and self-flagillation, but adultery is, as Jean-Paul Sartre might put it, autrement sérieux.

This is why homosexuality and satanism are so vital to the Fire and Brimstone preacher. They have scarcity value and they put bums on seats better than anything a fundamentalist or evangelical will admit to doing, even when charged and convicted, with film at eleven.

It is no accident that popular religion continues to promote Doomsday, Hell and the Bogey Man of human sexuality. Without these, popular religion's business plan falls to pieces and they'd have to get real jobs in some field other than religio-political showbiz. Take away the BS and you are left with a struggling mainstream church with a mortgage and a moribund congregation.

The liberal Protestant Church is now boarded up. The Roman Catholic Church has, much to the relief of the parish priest, been closed. The town's main industry was killed by mismanagement and thievery. Only the Pentecostal Church and a declining population remains.

That little world is dying but it lives on in hundreds of thousands of small towns, villages and suburbs across the Bible Belts of Canada and America.

Even my parents sold the "cottage" to out-of-towners while the going was good.

Fundamentalism is an expression of the envy, hatred and ressentiment of the lower classes. Evangelicalism is the kinder, gentler version (most older congregrations that have an established population and budgets) that appeals to the better-footed portions of the industrious upper working and small business classes. Mainstream religion is just the older, better-established sects left over from earlier Great Revivals, plus some of the Established Churches (Anglican, Lutheran, etc.) of Old Europe.

In America (including Canada and other outlying territories), religion is a business and business is the civil religion.

The meek, clutching their guns and their Bibles, shall inherit the Earth. And then over the next few generations, turn into Liberals, just as many methodists, baptists, Presbyterians, Lutherans, and Episcopalians did before them.

And when the end comes, there will be nothing but elderly Unitarians and Quakers and such like, tending the old, empty meeting houses until the New Religion comes along, and taking care of their "poor" and other charities. Kindly, liberal, old people. The gentle, kindly salt of the Earth, unlike their saltier but brimstone-stinking ancestors with pews to fill and a building fund to complete.
 
2013-01-04 01:44:59 PM  

Lawnchair: soakitincider: anal sex is filthy

Fortunately for you, about half of sexually active gay men agree with you and don't participate in it. So you should have no problem finding suckbuddies.


fortunately for me, i'm not attracted to men, and my wife does a sufficient job of that anyhow.
 
2013-01-04 01:48:36 PM  
CORRECTION
For example, even when I was eight years old I was not ignorant or dumb enough to fail to realize that the guy who was making a show of confessing his drinking and smoking was leaving out the well-known fact that his pickup truck was parked in a neighbour's drive way when the neighbour was out of town.
 
2013-01-04 01:49:32 PM  

TappingTheVein: Easy, just call Bob Larson to perform a Gay Demon Exorcism(tm).
Warning: this video is disturbing, as in 'can lower your IQ' disturbing.


Disturbing?  That video was hysterical!
 
2013-01-04 01:53:45 PM  

Snort: Buttknuckle: I had anal sex with my bf last night. I'm about to hit the can in a minute. Will let you guys know what happens.

He hasn't reported back!

SATAN LIVES!


According to the toaster anyway

25.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-01-04 01:55:59 PM  

relaxitsjustme: TappingTheVein: Easy, just call Bob Larson to perform a Gay Demon Exorcism(tm).
Warning: this video is disturbing, as in 'can lower your IQ' disturbing.

Disturbing?  That video was hysterical!


I was a little disappointed. That demon didn't put up much of a fight. Where was the foaming at the mouth, the convulsions and the speaking in tongues?
 
2013-01-04 01:59:05 PM  
It's still not as bad as Chipotle.
 
2013-01-04 02:06:59 PM  

Tyrone Slothrop: Slu: Obvious tag out to lunch?

In all seriousness, why is everyone a porn "star"? Nobody is just a porn actor. If nobody knows you are, you are not a star. There have been like 5 real porn stars.

Hmm. Real female porn stars:

Marilyn Chambers
Nina Hartley
Ginger Lynn
Jenna Jameson
Sasha Grey

Real male porn stars:

Ron Jeremy
John Holmes


Don't forget Christy Canyons...she was in a LOT of those movies (you've kind of dated yourself I'm at the same place). And Peter North...he seemed to be popular with the kids.
 
2013-01-04 02:38:42 PM  

Z-clipped: steamingpile: Saw a documentary about the porn industry which had gay porn with self described "straight" men, the GF and I agreed that if you take, receive, suck then at the least you're BI. But all these guys insisted they're 100% straight and only doing it for the money, what's even weirder their GFs were on the set saying the same thing.

Not that I don't believe them and all, but surely there's got to be an easier way to make $200? I mean, are you really that pressed for time that 2 hours of getting pounded in the butt by another man is preferable to, say, an 8 hour shift waiting tables?


very crazy.........unless....your on meth.
 
2013-01-04 02:47:21 PM  
Has anyone been able to find an actual porn that he was in? Google doesn't seem to know of any.

I'd think that would be a minimum requirement before you can claim the title of "porn star".
 
2013-01-04 03:04:14 PM  

JeffDenver: Has anyone been able to find an actual porn that he was in? Google doesn't seem to know of any.

I'd think that would be a minimum requirement before you can claim the title of "porn star".


I wondered about that, too. I call shenanigans here. Normally (under practically any other circumstance) I wouldn't think any guy would actually try to deceive you into thinking he had done gay porn. However, this is a crazy evangelical Christian trying to push his anti-gay ministry by means of making himself seem like the worst gay ever who was redeemed and healed. That would give his ministry a lot of cred.

/and just for good measure, he through the occult in there, too!
 
2013-01-04 03:04:30 PM  

HailRobonia: Slu: In all seriousness, why is everyone a porn "star"? Nobody is just a porn actor. If nobody knows you are, you are not a star. There have been like 5 real porn stars.

I can name 5 porn stars:

Aldebaran (popular with size queens), Sirius (who can turn down some hot twin action), Arcturus (the S&M star.... she wears kinky booties), Regulus (gay for pay), and PSR J0437-4715.


imageshack.us
 
2013-01-04 03:12:47 PM  

Diogenes: Buttknuckle: I had anal sex with my bf last night. I'm about to hit the can in a minute. Will let you guys know what happens.

I suggest flushing with holy water.


You've got to have a pretty teensy butt to fit it in that little container they hang off the wall, and you might have to push a choirboy out of the way first.
 
2013-01-04 03:14:28 PM  

Transpogue: So what do us queer girls who take it in the butt from their gf's strap-on give birth to?


Straight male fantasies would be my guess.
 
2013-01-04 03:25:05 PM  

Just Another OC Homeless Guy: I'll just drop this here....

Gerbil Rocket

(1997 - 1998) "In retrospect, lighting the match was my big mistake. But I was only trying to save the gerbil," Eric Tomaszewski told the bemused doctors in the Severe Burns Unit of Salt Lake City Hospital. Tomaszewski and his homosexual partner, Andrew "Kiki" Farnum, had been admitted for emergency treatment after a felching session had gone seriously wrong.

"I pushed a cardboard toilet paper tube up his rectum and slipped Ragout, our gerbil, in," he explained. "As usual, Kiki shouted out 'Armageddon,' my cue that he'd had reached nirvana, so to speak. I tried to retrieve Raggot but he simply would not come out, so I peered into the tube and struck a match, thinking the light might attract him."

At a hushed press conference, a hospital spokesman desribed what happened next.

"The match ignited a pocket of intestinal methane gas in Kiki's colon. Flames shot out the tube, ignited Mr. Tomaszewski's hair and severely burning his face. It also set fire to the gerbil's fur and whiskers, causing it to scurry further up Kiki's colon, which in turn ignited a larger pocket of gas further up the intestine, propelling the rodent out of the cardboard tube like a cannonball."

Tomaszewski suffered second degree burns and a broken nose from the impact of the gerbil, while Farnum suffered first and second degree burns to his anus and lower intestinal tract.

Sadly, Ragout the gerbil did not survive the incident.


I guarantee that most religious people do not date the commencement of the End Times to this event, despite it clearly being the culmination of man's long descent from the trees.
 
2013-01-04 03:54:59 PM  

hockeychick: Transpogue: So what do us queer girls who take it in the butt from their gf's strap-on give birth to?

He did specifically call out the penis-- he said nothing about strap-ons, various produce...

I'm only asking because I think a demon or two could really spice up my home decor.

[kithfans.com image 507x333]


Wow, a chick who's into hockey and Kids in the Hall? I never thought I'd see the day. Maybe I need to hang out in Canada more.
 
2013-01-04 05:42:24 PM  

Armand Tanzarian: hockeychick: Transpogue: So what do us queer girls who take it in the butt from their gf's strap-on give birth to?

He did specifically call out the penis-- he said nothing about strap-ons, various produce...

I'm only asking because I think a demon or two could really spice up my home decor.

[kithfans.com image 507x333]

Wow, a chick who's into hockey and Kids in the Hall? I never thought I'd see the day. Maybe I need to hang out in Canada more.


I'm not Canadian. And I happen to like Formula 1 and crochet as a hobby.
 
2013-01-04 06:26:56 PM  
I used to have a gay anal devil baby that I birthed from my butt. I named him Tobey after Tobey Maguire, who was all the rage those days (long before Spiderman 3) and I saved him in a pickle jar that I kept on the fire place mantle.

Unfortunately, I lost Tobey a few years back during a move to a new home. I was coming out of the closet with a box of my larger sized dildos and tripped on one of my chihuahuas. The box of dildos smashed into Tobey. It was so bad that bits of him were stuck to the ceiling.

After that, I never worked up the nerve to try for another gay anal devil baby. One day I'll meet the right man. I've already picked out a name.
 
2013-01-04 07:01:58 PM  
Brantgoose

Farking brilliant. I love it!
 
2013-01-04 07:02:31 PM  
Neville?
 
2013-01-04 07:29:36 PM  

MrHappyRotter: After that, I never worked up the nerve to try for another gay anal devil baby.


Our gay anal devil baby is the joy of our lives! But it was so hard to find a daycare center (we both work) that would take little Cornelius. He kept getting into mischief. There was a nasty little kid that would pull his tail during finger-painting time, and Cornelius boiled off his flesh. At the next place, Corny would get called names by the others, so he would levitate them into busy intersections and, well, that didn't end well. The third place had a bible-thumper worker who always made him stand in the corner, so Corny put a pox on her cattle. Turns out she actually had cattle, and they all died after a week of projectile diarrhea.. For now, we found a sweet little Wiccan undergrad (Theological Administration) who adores him and can babysit on a flexible schedule.
 
2013-01-04 09:02:33 PM  

Transpogue: So what do us queer girls who take it in the butt from their gf's strap-on give birth to?

He did specifically call out the penis-- he said nothing about strap-ons, various produce...

I'm only asking because I think a demon or two could really spice up my home decor.


That is extremely selfish of you. Think of those poor demons, ripped away from their homes by a physically-generated spell creating a intermittent hyperspacially-contiguous locus between the nether regions and Earth. Seriously! Do you REALLY think those demons WANT to come here? Especially without warning that they should pack their winter clothing? PLEASE, think of the demons!
 
2013-01-04 09:04:23 PM  

Just Another OC Homeless Guy: I'll just drop this here....

Gerbil Rocket

(1997 - 1998) "In retrospect, lighting the match was my big mistake. But I was only trying to save the gerbil," Eric Tomaszewski told the bemused doctors in the Severe Burns Unit of Salt Lake City Hospital. Tomaszewski and his homosexual partner, Andrew "Kiki" Farnum, had been admitted for emergency treatment after a felching session had gone seriously wrong.

"I pushed a cardboard toilet paper tube up his rectum and slipped Ragout, our gerbil, in," he explained. "As usual, Kiki shouted out 'Armageddon,' my cue that he'd had reached nirvana, so to speak. I tried to retrieve Raggot but he simply would not come out, so I peered into the tube and struck a match, thinking the light might attract him."

At a hushed press conference, a hospital spokesman desribed what happened next.

"The match ignited a pocket of intestinal methane gas in Kiki's colon. Flames shot out the tube, ignited Mr. Tomaszewski's hair and severely burning his face. It also set fire to the gerbil's fur and whiskers, causing it to scurry further up Kiki's colon, which in turn ignited a larger pocket of gas further up the intestine, propelling the rodent out of the cardboard tube like a cannonball."

Tomaszewski suffered second degree burns and a broken nose from the impact of the gerbil, while Farnum suffered first and second degree burns to his anus and lower intestinal tract.

Sadly, Ragout the gerbil did not survive the incident.


http://www.snopes.com/risque/homosex/gerbil.asp
 
2013-01-04 09:04:42 PM  

MrHappyRotter: I used to have a gay anal devil baby that I birthed from my butt. I named him Tobey after Tobey Maguire, who was all the rage those days (long before Spiderman 3) and I saved him in a pickle jar that I kept on the fire place mantle.

Unfortunately, I lost Tobey a few years back during a move to a new home. I was coming out of the closet with a box of my larger sized dildos and tripped on one of my chihuahuas. The box of dildos smashed into Tobey. It was so bad that bits of him were stuck to the ceiling.

After that, I never worked up the nerve to try for another gay anal devil baby. One day I'll meet the right man. I've already picked out a name.


Absolutely tits name for a band.
 
2013-01-04 09:09:51 PM  

lemonysprite: Just Another OC Homeless Guy: I'll just drop this here....

Gerbil Rocket

(1997 - 1998) "In retrospect, lighting the match was my big mistake. But I was only trying to save the gerbil," Eric Tomaszewski told the bemused doctors in the Severe Burns Unit of Salt Lake City Hospital. Tomaszewski and his homosexual partner, Andrew "Kiki" Farnum, had been admitted for emergency treatment after a felching session had gone seriously wrong.

"I pushed a cardboard toilet paper tube up his rectum and slipped Ragout, our gerbil, in," he explained. "As usual, Kiki shouted out 'Armageddon,' my cue that he'd had reached nirvana, so to speak. I tried to retrieve Raggot but he simply would not come out, so I peered into the tube and struck a match, thinking the light might attract him."

At a hushed press conference, a hospital spokesman desribed what happened next.

"The match ignited a pocket of intestinal methane gas in Kiki's colon. Flames shot out the tube, ignited Mr. Tomaszewski's hair and severely burning his face. It also set fire to the gerbil's fur and whiskers, causing it to scurry further up Kiki's colon, which in turn ignited a larger pocket of gas further up the intestine, propelling the rodent out of the cardboard tube like a cannonball."

Tomaszewski suffered second degree burns and a broken nose from the impact of the gerbil, while Farnum suffered first and second degree burns to his anus and lower intestinal tract.

Sadly, Ragout the gerbil did not survive the incident.

http://www.snopes.com/risque/homosex/gerbil.asp


Seriously. EVERYONE knows that is a made up story (but a funnier than hell one). For one thing, no hospital in existence would have a farking press conference making public the names of the patients and the circumstances of their injuries. Second, if it had actually happened, a crazed PETA leadership would probably have paid for hits on Tomaszewski and Farnum, and that would be well known. So: why did you obviously feel the need to research it and print the Snopes link? Sandy vagina?
 
2013-01-04 09:25:09 PM  

hockeychick: Armand Tanzarian: hockeychick: Transpogue: So what do us queer girls who take it in the butt from their gf's strap-on give birth to?

He did specifically call out the penis-- he said nothing about strap-ons, various produce...

I'm only asking because I think a demon or two could really spice up my home decor.

[kithfans.com image 507x333]

Wow, a chick who's into hockey and Kids in the Hall? I never thought I'd see the day. Maybe I need to hang out in Canada more.

I'm not Canadian. And I happen to like Formula 1 and crochet as a hobby.


Hey Stig, how can pine trees and Sundays piss you off?
 
2013-01-04 09:33:58 PM  
img.photobucket.com

Also makes me think of the story of some pre-medieval French king (Lothaire maybe?) Apparently his motive was his wife wasn't producing babies but his mistress was, so he was trying to get the church to allow him a divorce or kill his wife or something... he claimed that she was having anal sex (gasp!) with her brother (gasp) then using witchcraft to get pregnant from this (gasp!) and then for some reason also aborting the ass babies (gasp?) Maybe that last part is where he went too far -- the Pope ended up just excommunicating the wife, king and mistress all together.
 
2013-01-04 11:00:37 PM  
His "sphincters" (plural)? How many of those bad boys has he got? If he's got more than two, no wonder he was a gay porn star.
 
2013-01-05 01:39:48 AM  

Just Another OC Homeless Guy: lemonysprite: Just Another OC Homeless Guy: I'll just drop this here....

Gerbil Rocket

(1997 - 1998) "In retrospect, lighting the match was my big mistake. But I was only trying to save the gerbil," Eric Tomaszewski told the bemused doctors in the Severe Burns Unit of Salt Lake City Hospital. Tomaszewski and his homosexual partner, Andrew "Kiki" Farnum, had been admitted for emergency treatment after a felching session had gone seriously wrong.

"I pushed a cardboard toilet paper tube up his rectum and slipped Ragout, our gerbil, in," he explained. "As usual, Kiki shouted out 'Armageddon,' my cue that he'd had reached nirvana, so to speak. I tried to retrieve Raggot but he simply would not come out, so I peered into the tube and struck a match, thinking the light might attract him."

At a hushed press conference, a hospital spokesman desribed what happened next.

"The match ignited a pocket of intestinal methane gas in Kiki's colon. Flames shot out the tube, ignited Mr. Tomaszewski's hair and severely burning his face. It also set fire to the gerbil's fur and whiskers, causing it to scurry further up Kiki's colon, which in turn ignited a larger pocket of gas further up the intestine, propelling the rodent out of the cardboard tube like a cannonball."

Tomaszewski suffered second degree burns and a broken nose from the impact of the gerbil, while Farnum suffered first and second degree burns to his anus and lower intestinal tract.

Sadly, Ragout the gerbil did not survive the incident.

http://www.snopes.com/risque/homosex/gerbil.asp

Seriously. EVERYONE knows that is a made up story (but a funnier than hell one). For one thing, no hospital in existence would have a farking press conference making public the names of the patients and the circumstances of their injuries. Second, if it had actually happened, a crazed PETA leadership would probably have paid for hits on Tomaszewski and Farnum, and that would be well known. So: why did you obviously feel the need to re ...


Sounds like "sandy vagina" describes you more than me. Get some new material or at least a better burn.
 
2013-01-05 08:39:04 AM  

kid_icarus: JeffDenver: Has anyone been able to find an actual porn that he was in? Google doesn't seem to know of any.

I'd think that would be a minimum requirement before you can claim the title of "porn star".

I wondered about that, too. I call shenanigans here. Normally (under practically any other circumstance) I wouldn't think any guy would actually try to deceive you into thinking he had done gay porn. However, this is a crazy evangelical Christian trying to push his anti-gay ministry by means of making himself seem like the worst gay ever who was redeemed and healed. That would give his ministry a lot of cred.

/and just for good measure, he through the occult in there, too!


I think he's a fake
http://www.josephsciambra.com/2012/10/my-former-gay-life-in-porn.html

A poster in that comments section asks him what his porn name was and he replies:

"While I appreciate your interest in my story, I have decided not to release my porn name. I have a family, and I would rather that stuff stay buried. Anyway, as we all know porn moves at lighting speed; stuff that's a week old is already relegated to the bargain bins. Most of my porn films have disappeared."

Sooo, you are willing to be public with the idea that you were a gay porn "star" despite the fact you "have a family" but just don't want to give your name.

Yea, that makes sense
 
2013-01-05 09:54:19 AM  

lemonysprite: Just Another OC Homeless Guy: lemonysprite: Just Another OC Homeless Guy: I'll just drop this here....

Gerbil Rocket

(1997 - 1998) "In retrospect, lighting the match was my big mistake. But I was only trying to save the gerbil," Eric Tomaszewski told the bemused doctors in the Severe Burns Unit of Salt Lake City Hospital. Tomaszewski and his homosexual partner, Andrew "Kiki" Farnum, had been admitted for emergency treatment after a felching session had gone seriously wrong.

"I pushed a cardboard toilet paper tube up his rectum and slipped Ragout, our gerbil, in," he explained. "As usual, Kiki shouted out 'Armageddon,' my cue that he'd had reached nirvana, so to speak. I tried to retrieve Raggot but he simply would not come out, so I peered into the tube and struck a match, thinking the light might attract him."

At a hushed press conference, a hospital spokesman desribed what happened next.

"The match ignited a pocket of intestinal methane gas in Kiki's colon. Flames shot out the tube, ignited Mr. Tomaszewski's hair and severely burning his face. It also set fire to the gerbil's fur and whiskers, causing it to scurry further up Kiki's colon, which in turn ignited a larger pocket of gas further up the intestine, propelling the rodent out of the cardboard tube like a cannonball."

Tomaszewski suffered second degree burns and a broken nose from the impact of the gerbil, while Farnum suffered first and second degree burns to his anus and lower intestinal tract.

Sadly, Ragout the gerbil did not survive the incident.

http://www.snopes.com/risque/homosex/gerbil.asp

Seriously. EVERYONE knows that is a made up story (but a funnier than hell one). For one thing, no hospital in existence would have a farking press conference making public the names of the patients and the circumstances of their injuries. Second, if it had actually happened, a crazed PETA leadership would probably have paid for hits on Tomaszewski and Farnum, and that would be well known. Second, if it had actually happened, a crazed PETA leadership would probably have paid for hits on Tomaszewski and Farnum, and that would be well known. So: why did you obviously feel the need to research it and print the Snopes link? Sandy vagina?

Sounds like "sandy vagina" describes you more than me. Get some new material or at least a better burn.


??? Whatever, dude. Stay safe. Remember to have your friends wear condoms.
And make sure your vet gives your gerbil a clean bill of health.
 
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