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(Gizmag)   Inexpensive card-sized device runs 50 blood tests in seconds. We're gonna figure out which one of us is human and which of us is the Thing   (gizmag.com) divider line 26
    More: Cool, glass plate, hydrogen peroxide, bar charts, spectrometers  
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2214 clicks; posted to Geek » on 01 Jan 2013 at 2:38 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



26 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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ZAZ [TotalFark]
2013-01-01 10:43:07 AM
A full vial of blood must be drawn, individual portions of which are then loaded into large, expensive machines such as mass spectrometers.

Technicians are programmed to draw a full vial of blood no matter how much the tests need.

A sample drop of blood or other bodily fluid is placed in another well, at one end of the V-chip.

I hope the chip blocks it. I'd hate for my blood to show up on TV.
 
2013-01-01 11:29:06 AM
We would have also accepted "Cylon", unless we're still pissed at the ending.
 
2013-01-01 12:05:23 PM
You could identify a lot of changelings with that.
 
NFA [TotalFark]
2013-01-01 01:08:20 PM
FTA-"and it costs about US$10. "

However, once the for profit hospitals get their hands on it, it will be a nice $10,000 addition to your bill.
 
2013-01-01 01:28:37 PM
watched this last night so getting a kick...
 
2013-01-01 01:48:27 PM
I'm pretty sure you can identify the thing by the orange rocky exterior, and the tendency to shout 'ITS CLOBBERIN' TIME!"
 
2013-01-01 02:45:51 PM
Oh, sorry peasants. I just bought the exclusive rights to this test. It will now cost you $28,000.
 
2013-01-01 02:50:08 PM
We should be more concerned with who among us is a cylon.
 
2013-01-01 02:56:15 PM
This is a wonderful feat of engineering but how many lab techs will eventually be put out of work? We keep making things so people don't need to work so hard to achieve results, and then wonder why the unemployment rates keep climbing higher and higher. And those people likely won't even get a job MAKING the v-chips because they'll be outsourced to china like everything else..
 
2013-01-01 03:02:18 PM
so gizmag is a new sponsor?
 
2013-01-01 03:02:35 PM

dopekitty74: This is a wonderful feat of engineering but how many lab techs will eventually be put out of work? We keep making things so people don't need to work so hard to achieve results, and then wonder why the unemployment rates keep climbing higher and higher. And those people likely won't even get a job MAKING the v-chips because they'll be outsourced to china like everything else..


It will take twenty years to get the OK for hospitals to use this
 
2013-01-01 03:23:37 PM

dopekitty74: This is a wonderful feat of engineering but how many lab techs will eventually be put out of work? We keep making things so people don't need to work so hard to achieve results, and then wonder why the unemployment rates keep climbing higher and higher. And those people likely won't even get a job MAKING the v-chips because they'll be outsourced to china like everything else..


People have been saying that sort of thing since the dawn of the industrial revolution. The printing press put people out of work too, but I hope we can all agree it was the right way to go, in hindsight? Why should we treat the labor-saving technologies of today any differently.
 
2013-01-01 03:29:12 PM

dopekitty74: This is a wonderful feat of engineering but how many lab techs will eventually be put out of work? We keep making things so people don't need to work so hard to achieve results, and then wonder why the unemployment rates keep climbing higher and higher. And those people likely won't even get a job MAKING the v-chips because they'll be outsourced to china like everything else..


it's called progress, honey. try learning something new
 
2013-01-01 03:46:51 PM
DNRTFA. But I thought of this.

www.infendo.com
 
2013-01-01 03:47:44 PM

dopekitty74: This is a wonderful feat of engineering but how many lab techs will eventually be put out of work? We keep making things so people don't need to work so hard to achieve results, and then wonder why the unemployment rates keep climbing higher and higher. And those people likely won't even get a job MAKING the v-chips because they'll be outsourced to china like everything else..


You're right. We should continue to beat the blood samples with rocks to figure out what's in them.
 
2013-01-01 04:22:14 PM

dopekitty74: This is a wonderful feat of engineering but how many lab techs will eventually be put out of work? We keep making things so people don't need to work so hard to achieve results, and then wonder why the unemployment rates keep climbing higher and higher. And those people likely won't even get a job MAKING the v-chips because they'll be outsourced to china like everything else..


You should hop in your horse and buggy and go protest somewhere.
 
2013-01-01 04:29:28 PM

Altair: watched this last night so getting a kick...


There was a scheduled broadcast so I think you aren't the only one.
 
2013-01-01 04:31:39 PM

dopekitty74: This is a wonderful feat of engineering but how many lab techs will eventually be put out of work? We keep making things so people don't need to work so hard to results, and then wonder why the unemployment rates keep climbing higher and higher. And those people likely won't even get a job MAKING the v-chips because they'll be outsourced to china like everything else..


1) They don't make buggy whips any more, either.

2) The U.S. is still the largest manufacturing nation in the world
 
2013-01-01 05:33:35 PM
Maybe the techs could use the new free time to tackle the years-long backlog of unprocessed rape kits and DNA evidence in storage at many police stations.
 
2013-01-01 05:34:55 PM
Wow, Maury's gonna have to look for a new schtick.
 
2013-01-01 06:52:34 PM
The more that technology approaches science fiction the more scared we should be. When it is easy and cheap to test someone's blood, why not do it when they clock in for work?
 
2013-01-01 07:01:25 PM
Oh boy, I can't wait for the religious right to declare this as a sure sign you're sinner! Imagine anyone being able to buy a cheap, easy to use STD test...sure it cuts down on infection rates and is a boon for public health but we can't have people out there fornicating without consequence!
 
2013-01-01 07:11:49 PM
Dang it, we just drove by the Thing, and once again completely forgot to stop and take a look.
 
2013-01-02 12:38:18 AM
I can do the same thing with a blowtorch and copper wire. Big whoop.
 
2013-01-02 05:45:31 AM
Barbara Streisand
 
2013-01-02 06:00:18 AM
That's fricking awesome.  I imagine it could scan for most STDs.  Imagine you hook up with a hottie at the bar.  You each have a vchip...prick of the finger...and then when all results are clear, you get busy.

It would be the beginning of the 2nd Sexual Revolution.
 
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