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(Atlanta Journal Constitution)   Take my Walmart parking space? That's a rammin'   (ajc.com) divider line 131
    More: Stupid, Cartersville Walmart, SUV, parking spaces, Bartow County  
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10788 clicks; posted to Main » on 01 Jan 2013 at 1:28 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-01-01 05:29:20 PM
I like to walk down aisle, then when I notice a car following me, I cut over two lanes to where my car is parked.
 
2013-01-01 05:31:15 PM
 
2013-01-01 05:35:20 PM
CSB:

I parked my '96 Firebird, forest green with gold highlights, striping, trim, and interior (I take pride in my car and occasionally show it), in walmart one day and went to get some things.  When I came out, some blonde bimbo was standing there at the front and I was worried that she had hit me. Her minivan was about a yard back in the parking space, and my Firebird was a foot back from the line. While I was listening to her trying to point out the damage, an Aberdeen cop pulled up and we both tried see where it got hurt. In Washington, we have license plates up front. I have a gold chrome plate holder right at the point of the front bumper, there was no way she was gonna touch anything but that holder. In addition, the screws holding the thing to the car were covered with a plastic, chromy-looking caps. It wasn't long before the cop was huddled up with her, in the rain, as she pointed out several scratches on her bumper. I called the cops attention to the caps, they weren't scratched at all. The bumper on my 'Bird was untouched, and her minivan had the usual collection of dings and scratches that all grocery-getters acquire. The cop wasn't listening to me, mostly because the bimbo stayed down by the bumper trying to show the cop everything. I told the cop that the van wasn't there when I pulled up, and wasn't near my car when I got there, and he should check to see if she had run this scam before. He was still checking for bumps. At the end, she got $1200 from my insurance, and I got my insurance cancelled.

the moral of the story:  Don't park your shiny, well-tended vehicle in a Walmart Parking lot. It ain't just purse-snatchers out there.

/End CSB
//biatch done stole my insurance
///only Aberdeen pretty
 
2013-01-01 05:35:57 PM
a2.img.mobypicture.com
 
2013-01-01 05:40:48 PM
How many of you Farkers who are backing this woman for ramming the girl with her SUV  would NEVER shoot a burglar trying to steal stuff from their home.
 
2013-01-01 05:45:55 PM

Pud: [t2.gstatic.com image 256x144]

She just has better insurance.


Towanda!
 
2013-01-01 06:06:18 PM

Matthew Keene: [a2.img.mobypicture.com image 514x514]


the free box in the middle (someone oblivious to the fact that they are in your way)---I just assume that anywhere I go, not just WM. Even at farking work. Really? You're talking to someone while standing in the f*cking doorway? Jesus, people, have a sense of your surroundings. If not, at least glance around now and then so I don't look like the asshole for saying EXCUSE ME.
 
2013-01-01 06:11:14 PM

John Buck 41: Matthew Keene: [a2.img.mobypicture.com image 514x514]

the free box in the middle (someone oblivious to the fact that they are in your way)---I just assume that anywhere I go, not just WM. Even at farking work. Really? You're talking to someone while standing in the f*cking doorway? Jesus, people, have a sense of your surroundings. If not, at least glance around now and then so I don't look like the asshole for saying EXCUSE ME.


Don't ya just love the ones who stop right outside the door to dig out a cigarette and light it before moving on...
 
2013-01-01 06:27:55 PM

ZAZ: At a Trader Joe's near me the main parking lot is fed by a one lane, one way alley. Cars queue up in an orderly fashion (by physical necessity). If you pull into the main lot you're screwing yourself because you may be blocking a parked car from exiting. So it's usually calm. One car leaves, one car advances from alley into lot. Never seen a fight, nobody's pulled a gun. Sometimes a woman rams the building, but that's what women in parking lots do. An elegant layout for a more civilized age.

So I suggest Walmart employees should have to wear Hawaiian shirts and these parking problems will be solved.


To park at my post office (the only one in town now, thanks to budget cutbacks), you have to turn off a busy street into an alley which runs along the back of the ten or so spaces. If there are no spots available, you can continue about twenty feet further down the alley to the bank parking lot, which always has plenty of space available. But, somehow, that simple and elegant solution has never occurred to many of my fellow townsfolk.

If no spots are immediately available, they will stop in the alley and wait. This, of course, cuts off access to the bank parking lot, as well as the drive-up mailboxes. Even more annoying are those who discover they cannot turn into the alley because it's blocked by someone waiting for a space. So, instead of circling around the block, or parking in the massive, empty lot half-a-block up, they stop in the middle of the busy street, their blinker signaling their futile intentions, while the traffic piles up behind them, honking and swearing.
 
2013-01-01 06:28:57 PM

Mikeyworld: John Buck 41: Matthew Keene: [a2.img.mobypicture.com image 514x514]

the free box in the middle (someone oblivious to the fact that they are in your way)---I just assume that anywhere I go, not just WM. Even at farking work. Really? You're talking to someone while standing in the f*cking doorway? Jesus, people, have a sense of your surroundings. If not, at least glance around now and then so I don't look like the asshole for saying EXCUSE ME.

Don't ya just love the ones who stop right outside the door to dig out a cigarette and light it before moving on...


Well, I'm a smoker and have always been able to walk and light up at the same time, but yeah, I'd have a problem with that.
 
2013-01-01 06:33:26 PM
I would hate to see what she does to the school kids when they don't let her cut in front of them in while in the lunch line.
 
2013-01-01 06:34:39 PM

The Angry Hand of God: jayhawk88: There's just something about parking spaces that turns people crazy. My wife's like this: She'll want me to drive around the lot for 10 minutes, stalking people walking out of the store, rather than just going to park in the boonies and be done with it. "Oh look, those two are walking to their car, sit here and clog up this lane for 3 minutes while we wait for them to leave."

It's like, woman, do you know who I am? Are you familiar with my past works? If my foot had just been chopped off I wouldn't do that.

I pulled into a Wal-Mart parking lot the other day, and pulled into the first spot that was close enough that I wouldn't have to worry about turning around at the front of the store. My girlfriend acted like it was the worst thing I have ever done in my life.


Yes. It doesn't matter *where* you park in the lot, what matters is how long it will take you to get out. Because there is nothing worse than waiting on the slow walkers in Walmart, waiting in line behind someone buying 26 2-liters of mountain dew and a 4 roll pack of toilet paper, and then waiting for to try to turn onto the 'main drag' in front of Walmart to try to go home.

You don't hit someone with your car because they are doing something that is not clearly illegal. If there is nothing wrong with people grabbing 150 on-sale towels on Black Friday then there is nothing wrong with standing in a spot to save it. Walmart encourages this behavior. I don't like it, I don't shop there...

I have a bad habit of wanting to walk really fast everywhere I go because I am used to walking/running for exercise. SO sometimes when I'm in the grocery store or mall I will jog a bit until I realize I look like an insane shoplifter.
 
2013-01-01 07:06:47 PM
I park far out away from other cars and walk my fat ass. I love it when parking space stalkers start following me out and then peel away angry when they realize I don't have a prime spot.
 
2013-01-01 08:24:43 PM

BarkingUnicorn: Setitie: I like to, sometimes, walk back to my vehicle and see someone waiting for me to pull out and i just sit there and wait till they take off in frustration.

Or halt suddenly, snap your fingers like "Shiat, I forgot something," the turn around and head back towards the store.  They'll leave faster.


The point is to annoy them. If you did that after getting in the car it would be great.
 
2013-01-01 08:27:02 PM

dickfreckle: Pud: [t2.gstatic.com image 256x144]

She just has better insurance.

I should have known this joke would have been taken by the time my lazy ass got here.


Someone took your joke before you arrived? You should ram them.
 
2013-01-01 08:28:25 PM

lack of warmth: LemSkroob: just because you got knocked up, don't expect special privileges, or other people to bend to your will. Its on you to make arrangements needed so you can go about your day with your kid/fetus. Dont ask other people to have to bend for you.

Well, the new mom in question may have had a c-section and if you don't know a c-section is a surgery to the lower abdomen that leaves a wide scar. I do understand not making a woman who just had a c-section walk too far before borrowing a power cart once inside. I will say, if the 17 yro had a license or can move a vehicle safely, she should have dropped the new mom off and then park the car. They don't bother issuing handicap placards for outpatient surgeries. However when your lower stomach is held together by staples and bandages, walking can be a problem.

/have done this with my wife after two kids.


I missed the part where she needs to be inside the walmart when her friend is ostensibly there to help her. She can't do the shopping for the new mother?
 
2013-01-01 08:30:58 PM

Matthew Keene: [a2.img.mobypicture.com image 514x514]


While there are dumber things on there, "someone oblivious to the fac that they're in your way" is retarded. Not everyone has grocery-store telepathy. SAY SOMETHING TO THEM.

"Excuse me, I need to get to the peas." Even people who don't speak English know what "excuse me" means.
 
2013-01-01 08:33:54 PM

spidermilk: If there is nothing wrong with people grabbing 150 on-sale towels on Black Friday then there is nothing wrong with standing in a spot to save it. Walmart encourages this behavior.


Is there an outline of shoes spray-painted onto the primo parking spots that says 'D-bag Here?'
 
2013-01-01 09:14:38 PM
Every person involved is an idiot. But it's Wal Mart so that's to be expected.
 
2013-01-01 09:16:49 PM
This card missed "hickeys" and "black eye."

a2.img.mobypicture.com
 
2013-01-01 09:28:45 PM

Mikeyworld: CSB:

I parked my '96 Firebird, forest green with gold highlights, striping, trim, and interior (I take pride in my car and occasionally show it), in walmart one day and went to get some things.  When I came out, some blonde bimbo was standing there at the front and I was worried that she had hit me. Her minivan was about a yard back in the parking space, and my Firebird was a foot back from the line. While I was listening to her trying to point out the damage, an Aberdeen cop pulled up and we both tried see where it got hurt. In Washington, we have license plates up front. I have a gold chrome plate holder right at the point of the front bumper, there was no way she was gonna touch anything but that holder. In addition, the screws holding the thing to the car were covered with a plastic, chromy-looking caps. It wasn't long before the cop was huddled up with her, in the rain, as she pointed out several scratches on her bumper. I called the cops attention to the caps, they weren't scratched at all. The bumper on my 'Bird was untouched, and her minivan had the usual collection of dings and scratches that all grocery-getters acquire. The cop wasn't listening to me, mostly because the bimbo stayed down by the bumper trying to show the cop everything. I told the cop that the van wasn't there when I pulled up, and wasn't near my car when I got there, and he should check to see if she had run this scam before. He was still checking for bumps. At the end, she got $1200 from my insurance, and I got my insurance cancelled.

the moral of the story:  Don't park your shiny, well-tended vehicle in a Walmart Parking lot. It ain't just purse-snatchers out there.

/End CSB
//biatch done stole my insurance
///only Aberdeen pretty


I'm not sure who is the bigger idiot...you for not getting your insurance company to pay attention to the lack of damage to your vehicle and fighting the claim and/or having the worst insurance company in the world, or your insurance company for paying her damages and cancelling you as well. This isn't CSB, it's BS.
 
2013-01-01 10:18:59 PM
Was in a grocery store today with $90 worth of stuff in my carriage. I pull into the only open line that isn't 12 items or less behind some guy on the verge of being homeless looking. He doesn't put the separator bar behind his SINGLE 2 LITER OF COKE which rang up at $1.79. So I reluctantly hold back my "hey thanks for moving the bar" sarcasm, but anyways. This farking idiot waits until the cashier gives him the insurmountable total of a dollar seventy nine to complain that he thought it was on sale!!!! He makes the bagger go look at the display and the cashier open the latest flier to see if he can save 30 farking cents. 7 minutes later he's like" it wouldn't be the first time I've been wrong". Then he whips out a pile of small change, mostly nickels and dimes and spends another 5 minutes trying to count out the change. I was so close to just paying for this assholes coke just to leave but it felt better afterwards to see him look like an idiot. BTW this store had 4 open lanes where you scan your own stuff and an open 12 or less isle.
 
2013-01-01 10:26:42 PM

laid back w/bud light: 7 minutes later


You can make your point w/o exagerating.
 
2013-01-01 10:30:50 PM

laid back w/bud light: Was in a grocery store today with $90 worth of stuff in my carriage. I pull into the only open line that isn't 12 items or less behind some guy on the verge of being homeless looking. He doesn't put the separator bar behind his SINGLE 2 LITER OF COKE which rang up at $1.79. So I reluctantly hold back my "hey thanks for moving the bar" sarcasm, but anyways. This farking idiot waits until the cashier gives him the insurmountable total of a dollar seventy nine to complain that he thought it was on sale!!!! He makes the bagger go look at the display and the cashier open the latest flier to see if he can save 30 farking cents. 7 minutes later he's like" it wouldn't be the first time I've been wrong". Then he whips out a pile of small change, mostly nickels and dimes and spends another 5 minutes trying to count out the change. I was so close to just paying for this assholes coke just to leave but it felt better afterwards to see him look like an idiot. BTW this store had 4 open lanes where you scan your own stuff and an open 12 or less isle.


Yeah, par for the course in grocery stores around the world. He could have asked for cigs so the clerk had to go to customer service to get them and then come back saying they're out of that brand and another trip to customer service to get his second choice. What's your point? So you can't reach and place a separator bar yourself?
 
2013-01-01 11:57:10 PM

John Buck 41: Matthew Keene: [a2.img.mobypicture.com image 514x514]

the free box in the middle (someone oblivious to the fact that they are in your way)---I just assume that anywhere I go, not just WM. Even at farking work. Really? You're talking to someone while standing in the f*cking doorway? Jesus, people, have a sense of your surroundings. If not, at least glance around now and then so I don't look like the asshole for saying EXCUSE ME.


This is one of my personal least favorite dick moves that many people make. How can people be so damned clueless of their surroundings? I guess they really don't give a sh_t about others and don't care if you have to get by them. I was at the grocery store earlier today when to big beautiful black women decided to have a full conversation in the middle of the isle. Of course, it was complete with all of the stereotypical bullish_t you would expect in the conversation. I politely walked up to their two fatass_s and their carts and said, "excuse me". You would have thought that I just had put on a Klan hood and called them bad names by the reaction I received. Apparently, they thought that everyone would simply reverse down they damn aisle and go completely around the next aisles instead of "interfering" with their amazingly intellectual conversation about what D'Wande and D'Shandra had done at bingo the farking night before.
 
2013-01-02 09:05:44 AM

Gergesa: My mother and sister are like this. It is like the end of the world if they have to walk more than 10 feet. Holding up traffic for 10 minutes doesn't bother them. That spot near the front is theirs and they will have it even it requires blood sacrifice.


I wonder if this behavior is a side effect of wearing uncomfortable shoes. Even if they aren't in heels at the time, I could see how those who are prone to wear torture devices on their feet would default to always trying to get the closest parking space possible.
 
2013-01-02 09:57:29 AM

Big_Doofus: John Buck 41: Matthew Keene: [a2.img.mobypicture.com image 514x514]

the free box in the middle (someone oblivious to the fact that they are in your way)---I just assume that anywhere I go, not just WM. Even at farking work. Really? You're talking to someone while standing in the f*cking doorway? Jesus, people, have a sense of your surroundings. If not, at least glance around now and then so I don't look like the asshole for saying EXCUSE ME.

This is one of my personal least favorite dick moves that many people make. How can people be so damned clueless of their surroundings? I guess they really don't give a sh_t about others and don't care if you have to get by them. I was at the grocery store earlier today when to big beautiful black women decided to have a full conversation in the middle of the isle. Of course, it was complete with all of the stereotypical bullish_t you would expect in the conversation. I politely walked up to their two fatass_s and their carts and said, "excuse me". You would have thought that I just had put on a Klan hood and called them bad names by the reaction I received. Apparently, they thought that everyone would simply reverse down they damn aisle and go completely around the next aisles instead of "interfering" with their amazingly intellectual conversation about what D'Wande and D'Shandra had done at bingo the farking night before.


That's not just Walmart and not just black people either. Here in Florgia, If you walk into any sort of business establishment behind other people, you can expect that the oxygen thieves in front of you will stop in the entrance and look up at the bright lights like they've just been raptured. And because groups of people will automatically expand out to fill all available walking space (my friend calls it the Silverado formation, because they look like they're headed to a Wild West shootout), you don't have any good options for that situation.
 
2013-01-02 12:51:38 PM

martid4: This card missed "hickeys" and "black eye."

[a2.img.mobypicture.com image 514x514]


I do find this funny. I really do. But the spelling mistakes with "isle(aisle)" and "cloths(clothes)" are just too grating.

/modified mine from "rebel flag shirt" to Homeland Security aboriginal wear and "entire family wearing NASCAR apparel" to entire family wearing Toronto Maple Leafs jerseys out of season
//Ontario Edition
///THR33!
 
2013-01-02 01:56:46 PM
John Buck 41
you're from Maine so I can understand why you have nothing else to do but wait in line or split wood. It was no exaggeration.
 
2013-01-02 09:15:54 PM

laid back w/bud light: John Buck 41
you're from Maine so I can understand why you have nothing else to do but wait in line or split wood. It was no exaggeration.


After re-reading your original post, yeah, I guess it could've taken that long.

Pellet stove for the last 6 years. The hell with splitting wood.
 
2013-01-02 09:17:25 PM

laid back w/bud light: John Buck 41
you're from Maine so I can understand why you have nothing else to do but wait in line or split wood. It was no exaggeration.


Hey wait, you're from New Hampster; you're one to talk.
 
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