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(NBC News)   Kevin Smith says that "Clerks 3" will be his last effort as a director. That is if you count "Clerks" and "Clerks 2" as efforts   (entertainment.nbcnews.com ) divider line 129
    More: Followup, Kevin Smith, Chasing Amy, Silent Bob, high note  
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4190 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 31 Dec 2012 at 11:14 AM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-31 11:17:11 AM  
0/10
 
2012-12-31 11:18:49 AM  
He also said "Red State" was his last movie.
 
2012-12-31 11:19:29 AM  
What was the last good comedy Kevin Smith made? Dogma?
 
2012-12-31 11:21:19 AM  
Happy Scrappy Hero Pup!
 
2012-12-31 11:23:21 AM  

Carth: What was the last good comedy Kevin Smith made? Dogma?


Red State
 
2012-12-31 11:25:51 AM  
Clerks was okay but Clerks 2 was superfail. I love his speaking engagements, though, as he's a terrific orator. Just hearing the story of his attempts to get Superman remade and the morons he dealt with is worth it alone.
 
2012-12-31 11:27:35 AM  

Wadded Beef: Clerks was okay but Clerks 2 was superfail. I love his speaking engagements, though, as he's a terrific orator. Just hearing the story of his attempts to get Superman remade and the morons he dealt with is worth it alone.


Anne Frank and Helen Keller agree.

/Clerks 2 was incredibly offensive and totally awesome
 
2012-12-31 11:29:52 AM  
fark every single one of you who will hate on this. I say bring it on, I will watch it and hope to enjoy it!

/If it sucks, I'll hate it.
 
2012-12-31 11:30:33 AM  

Wadded Beef: Clerks was okay but Clerks 2 was superfail. I love his speaking engagements, though, as he's a terrific orator. Just hearing the story of his attempts to get Superman remade and the morons he dealt with is worth it alone.


Rosario Dawson dancing on the roof begs to differ.

/Porch monkey for life
 
2012-12-31 11:31:39 AM  
I've been a sometimes fan of Kevin Smith's stuff over the years, but never enough to be one of those View Askewniverse addicts. I liked Clerks for what it was back then, Mallrats was amusing, as was Dogma and Chasing Amy, but only once. And despite enjoying those movies I always got the feeling that I was always watching a well produced dorm-room home movie, basking in its own cleverness but seemingly disconnected from true maturity and wisdom. Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back is unwatchable, as is Zack and Miri Make a Porno and the several other submissions of Kevin Smith which well document his inability to grow the fark up. All I'm saying Kev is there's gotta be a reason you've spent the last decade or so being an ultra-defensive douche. Just ask Henry Rollins what that's like.
 
2012-12-31 11:32:51 AM  
What this guy needs to do is get a massive coronary
 
2012-12-31 11:33:32 AM  
Is he going to be collecting antiques full time?
i26.photobucket.com

/wish I had shop skills I would did a Jay and Silent Bob as the pickers
 
2012-12-31 11:33:56 AM  

theurge14: Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back is unwatchable


THIS. I haven't watched anything he's done since that turd hit the theater. He should reimburse anyone who paid to see that thing.
 
2012-12-31 11:34:32 AM  

Meethos: fark every single one of you who will hate on this. I say bring it on, I will watch it and hope to enjoy it!

/If it sucks, I'll hate it.


All you motherfarkers are gonna pay. You are the ones who are the ball-lickers. We're gonna fark your mothers while you watch and cry like little, whiny biatches. Once we get to Hollywood and find those Miramax farks who is makin' the movie... we're gonna make them eat our shiat, then shiat out our shiat, and then eat their shiat that's made up of our shiat that we made 'em eat. Then you're all you motherfarks are next. Love- Meethos
 
2012-12-31 11:37:27 AM  
imageshack.us
 
2012-12-31 11:41:21 AM  
He does look like the kind of guy who doesn't enjoy things that require effort.
 
2012-12-31 11:42:36 AM  

titwrench: Wadded Beef: Clerks was okay but Clerks 2 was superfail. I love his speaking engagements, though, as he's a terrific orator. Just hearing the story of his attempts to get Superman remade and the morons he dealt with is worth it alone.

Rosario Dawson dancing on the roof begs to differ.

/Porch monkey for life


It's cool, everybody, he's taking it back.
 
2012-12-31 11:44:45 AM  
Comic Book Men is a great show.
 
2012-12-31 11:45:53 AM  
In Clerks a gal humped a dead guy in the bathroom. In Clerks II a guy humped a donkey. So, with necrophilia and zoophilia covered, what's left, voyeurism or fetishism?

Wonder what kind of humping furry Jay or Dante would be.
 
2012-12-31 11:47:02 AM  

Carth: What was the last good comedy Kevin Smith made? Dogma?


Chasing Amy, if by "last" you mean "only."
 
2012-12-31 11:47:14 AM  

Carth: What was the last good comedy Kevin Smith made? Dogma?


Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back was a hell of a lot of fun, for a ridiculous movie. Jersey Girl was painful, and Clerks 2 seemed like it was written based on a checklist of references and callbacks he knew he had to make. Zack and Miri had its moments, but it just wasn't that interesting.
 
2012-12-31 11:47:59 AM  
So will Dante be running a car wash in florida or did he marry Dawson and make babbies?
Will the porch monkey still be a lackey or will he have matured some?
Will the donkey finally find fame and fortune on stage?
Will Jay finally take a suit and tie gig and have Silent Bob deliver him lunch?

Find on on this next episode of Who Uses Soap?
 
2012-12-31 11:49:31 AM  
You know, I'm kind of divided on this one. I liked the majority of Smith's movies, including Strikes Back (don't judge me), but I'm not sure where they're going to go with the 3rd one. I could see whole thing with the second Clerks, those guys in a rut and grow as characters and actually start doing something with their lives. But what now? Show Dante's marital bliss with his wife and kid? (Rosario Dawson eye candy would be awesome) Randall meeting his match? Pillow Pants kid getting laid? It just doesn't seem like there's anywhere to go with them anymore.
 
2012-12-31 11:49:36 AM  
I couldn't bring myself to watch Clerks when it came out, I was working in a crappy video store at the time. Later when it was released to video, I watched the beginning to the point where he hung the "I assure you we are open" sign and the first person walked in and asked if they were open. I couldn't stand any more of it. I lived that damn movie.

Then I quit my crap job, and the first thing I did was watch it. It was the most cathartic experience I have ever had. I still love it to this day.

//Other Kevin Smith movies not so much.
 
2012-12-31 11:49:52 AM  
What a copout.
 
2012-12-31 11:52:02 AM  

Wadded Beef: I love his speaking engagements, though, as he's a terrific orator. Just hearing the story of his attempts to get Superman remade and the morons he dealt with is worth it alone.


Yeah, I like Kevin Smith the dude far more than I do his work. He seems like a pretty genuine, down to Earth, funny guy who tells a story really well. I think he's humble and hasn't let the manic fans who love him go to his head. I respect that, and I respect that he stays true to his roots and who he is. I love to listen to him in interviews.

I just don't care much for his work. His movies are fine, I suppose, once, but the only one that ever really struck me as "that was really good!" was Chasing Amy. Everything else -- and I've seen them all -- strikes me as, "Why do people think this is to brilliant and funny?"

To each his own, i suppose. I don't begrudge the guy. Hell, I'm glad he gets to do the kind of stuff he wants to do and make a living at it. We should all be so lucky.
 
2012-12-31 11:54:24 AM  
Being a casual fan (I've enjoyed most of his movies, and like what I've heard and read), I decided to go to one of his recent live shows, which was essentially a Q & A with the audience. I felt completely out of my depth, not realizing I would have to keep up with his podcasts and website to understand what everyone was talking about (Adam Carolla? Not directing anymore?) Still he was amusing, and seemed very grateful for his fans (who traveled crazy distances just to see him).
 
2012-12-31 11:54:38 AM  
What about that hockey movie he was making? Wasn't that suppose to be the last?
 
2012-12-31 11:54:41 AM  

LouDobbsAwaaaay: theurge14: Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back is unwatchable

THIS. I haven't watched anything he's done since that turd hit the theater. He should reimburse anyone who paid to see that thing.


"All you motherfarkers are gonna pay. You are the ones who are the ball-lickers. We're gonna fark your mothers while you watch and cry like little, whiny biatches. Once we get to Hollywood and find those Miramax farks who is makin' the movie... we're gonna make them eat our shiat, then shiat out our shiat, and then eat their shiat that's made up of our shiat that we made 'em eat. Then you're all you motherfarks are next. Love- Jay and Silent Bob"
 
2012-12-31 11:55:28 AM  
WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!?!

Christ, man!  Give it up!  You were the one ranting about how one a story had been told, it should be left alone!

Clerks book-ended itself just fine.  The story is over.  Dante and Randall bought the Quick Stop, Dante got the girl (and the babby), Randall gets to continue banging high school chicks, Jay and Bob own the wall they lean on, and yes, we assure you, he *is* supposed to be there today.  It's DONE.

Although, I guess now that everybody's middle-aged, they can do the whole "old responsible people coping with the next generation of slackers" reboot garbage.  The world doesn't need this.
 
2012-12-31 12:05:00 PM  
Well, they could bring back Caitlin Bree from the crazy farm and that makes a dilema for Dante...(you know, stay with his current wife or take the girlfriend back)

just saying...
 
2012-12-31 12:05:29 PM  
Kevin Smith eats his money. Every movie is his last movie until he realizes he's still alive, counter to his expectations.
 
ecl
2012-12-31 12:05:32 PM  
Red state was worse than a Sci-Fi movie.
 
2012-12-31 12:07:39 PM  

Lumbar Puncture: LouDobbsAwaaaay: theurge14: Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back is unwatchable

THIS. I haven't watched anything he's done since that turd hit the theater. He should reimburse anyone who paid to see that thing.

"All you motherfarkers are gonna pay. You are the ones who are the ball-lickers. We're gonna fark your mothers while you watch and cry like little, whiny biatches. Once we get to Hollywood and find those Miramax farks who is makin' the movie... we're gonna make them eat our shiat, then shiat out our shiat, and then eat their shiat that's made up of our shiat that we made 'em eat. Then you're all you motherfarks are next. Love- Jay and Silent Bob"


The really odd thing is that Kevin Smith adopted that attitude toward his critics.
 
2012-12-31 12:16:46 PM  

Carth: What was the last good comedy Kevin Smith made? Dogma?


Gigli.
 
2012-12-31 12:23:46 PM  

Wadded Beef: Clerks was okay but Clerks 2 was superfail. I love his speaking engagements, though, as he's a terrific orator. Just hearing the story of his attempts to get Superman remade and the morons he dealt with is worth it alone.


Oh God yes! His story about trying to make the documentary with Prince is on par with the Superman story - giant mechanical spiders, FTW!
 
2012-12-31 12:28:45 PM  
I thought Clerks 2 was fun, and it showed where those characters would be in there 30s. It'll be interesting to see the final chapter, hopefully it's good as well.

And I'd be fine to see Rosario return, she's lovely, but I doubt she will.
 
2012-12-31 12:29:12 PM  
Clerks was good and it still holds up although Dante is whiny and annoying. Everything else he's done is terrible.
 
2012-12-31 12:32:48 PM  

steklo: Well, they could bring back Caitlin Bree from the crazy farm and that makes a dilema for Dante...(you know, stay with his current wife or take the girlfriend back)

just saying...


I vaguely recall that being resolved in a comic about a decade or so ago. Dante sneaks into the hospital she's in and sticks a candy cane in her vag, which breaks her out of her stupor as she tries to kill Dante.
 
2012-12-31 12:36:45 PM  
Check this tubby biatch out.

media.tumblr.com
I don't know why but I always thought this was the greatest scene in a movie, ever. It was just so random and yet fit so perfect. That said, about half of KS's stuff is shiat and no I didn't like Clerks 2 so I probably won't be watching Clerks 3 to see the movie raped again.
 
2012-12-31 12:38:51 PM  

SkylineRecords: titwrench: Wadded Beef: Clerks was okay but Clerks 2 was superfail. I love his speaking engagements, though, as he's a terrific orator. Just hearing the story of his attempts to get Superman remade and the morons he dealt with is worth it alone.

Rosario Dawson dancing on the roof begs to differ.

/Porch monkey for life

It's cool, everybody, he's taking it back.


This, and the this before it. Clerks 2 was great and I enjoyed the hell out of it. Out of the Clerks saga, I think the only unwatchable one was Chasing Amy, but that's just me as I am sure that there are some people that are either lesbians or who love Joey Lauren Adams out there that liked it.
 
2012-12-31 12:38:51 PM  
I believe he admitted in one Q&A that he will milk the Clerks stories for everything he can, and has no problem with someone playing Silent Bob in the eventual remake 20 years from now. At least the guy is honest about riding the train.
 
2012-12-31 12:40:09 PM  
If they do not give us an update on the Eff You Yankee Blue Jeans band, I care not.
 
2012-12-31 12:47:38 PM  

WhippingBoy: Carth: What was the last good comedy Kevin Smith made? Dogma?

Gigli.


0/10.

dwade: What about that hockey movie he was making? Wasn't that suppose to be the last?


FTFA - Smith's announcement follows the news that his hockey flick "Hit Somebody" will now be turned into a six-part miniseries on an unannounced network.

I guess I'm one of the few that genuinely enjoyed Clerks 2. I get accused of being a huge Smith apologist, but I'm not - the stuff I like I love, and the stuff I don't I despise.

Clerks - loved it. Still love it.
Mallrata - hated it.
Chasing Amy - one of my all-time favorite movies.
Dogma - LOVED the script (it leaked online a year before the movie came out). Did not care for the finished product. Chris Rock may be the most talented living comedian out there, but MAN he's just not a strong actor. With better performances Dogma could have been his greatest film.
Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back - didn't care for it. For me it felt like a big ol' "Thanks" to his die-hard fans. Which is fine. And it had it's moments, but overall it just didn't work for me.
Jersey Girl - A nice little picture. I honestly don't understand the hate. Maybe it's because the huge fans wanted Jay & Silent Bob. Maybe it's because of the Bennifer backlash (which seems so quaint now). But it's a sweet little flick about a guy trying to juggle fatherhood and career ambition.
Clerks 2 - I liked it a lot. Very funny and very sweet.
Zack and Miri - I wanted to love it. I really did. But I couldn't. With that cast, the standout shouldn't be Craig Robinson. It had all the ingredients of a great comedy, but it never really came together for me. (Bonus point added for Traci Lords)
Cop Out - Wow. Just wow. One of the very worst movies I've ever seen. Although to be fair, after hearing Smith's comments about it, it was doomed from the start. It sounds like trying to direct Bruce Willis in a movie he doesn't want to make is like trying to push a car uphill with a rope.
Red State - loved it. Michael Parks was absolutely brilliant, and Smith's pal Ralph Garman was actually really, really great in a mute role. The only part I didn't care for was Goodman's recap of the events at the end - which I have heard some Smith non-fans say was their FAVORITE part. Go figure.

/37????
 
2012-12-31 12:48:37 PM  
Chasing Amy was a failed attempt at making a good "film" rather than a movie. It failed because it was so ham handed and silly, but also vulgar. The characters all come off as selfish, and don't really grow in logical ways.

It is pretty obvious that he just gave up after he fouled that one up so bad. Clerks showed potential, and Mallrats suffered because of bad casting choices, but it wasn't until Chasing Amy that he realized he would never be sucessful at making anything better than C grade schlock.

At least he realized his failings and has embraced his true calling.
 
2012-12-31 12:50:03 PM  

Neeek: steklo: Well, they could bring back Caitlin Bree from the crazy farm and that makes a dilema for Dante...(you know, stay with his current wife or take the girlfriend back)

just saying...

I vaguely recall that being resolved in a comic about a decade or so ago. Dante sneaks into the hospital she's in and sticks a candy cane in her vag, which breaks her out of her stupor as she tries to kill Dante.


Oh, I had no idea there was a Clerks comic-book. I learned something new today. Thanks!
 
2012-12-31 12:50:42 PM  
Clerks 2 and Strikes back were Smith,Affleck, etc versions of Cannonball Run 1,2.

Just some guys having a good time.

And you cannot beat female logic as exposed in Clerks. 37
 
2012-12-31 12:56:56 PM  
Smith's movies only seem good when you are 18-25. More than ANY other director, he knows how to hit that demographic.

The problem is, the day you turn 26, you can't watch his movies anymore.You've outgrown them.

I have a nostalgiac love for Kevin Smith movies. But whenever I happen to catch one on TV, I think 'Man, this is pretty juvenile and stupid and unfunny."

That said, the "Jay" and "Silent Bob" characters are pretty great inventions, and they're almost always funny.
 
2012-12-31 01:08:52 PM  
I have a soft spot for Clerks because I've been both a video and convenience store clerk in that part of New Jersey.
 
2012-12-31 01:21:10 PM  

realmolo: Smith's movies only seem good when you are 18-25. More than ANY other director, he knows how to hit that demographic.

The problem is, the day you turn 26, you can't watch his movies anymore.You've outgrown them.

I have a nostalgiac love for Kevin Smith movies. But whenever I happen to catch one on TV, I think 'Man, this is pretty juvenile and stupid and unfunny."

That said, the "Jay" and "Silent Bob" characters are pretty great inventions, and they're almost always funny.



I was in high school when Clerks and Mallrats came out, and I can still watch them from time to time.
I think by and large, Smith just doesn't care that much about movies any more. I read that on the Cop Out set, he pretty much just sat at the monitors getting stoned the entire time. Given how bad that movie turned out, I'm not surprised.

At this point, I think he just wants to make sure his kid has enough money for college and he has enough money to cover his weed and snacks bill.
 
2012-12-31 01:43:17 PM  

theflatline: Clerks 2 and Strikes back were Smith,Affleck, etc versions of Cannonball Run 1,2.

Just some guys having a good time.

And you cannot beat female logic as exposed in Clerks. 37


Holy crap! A Kevin Smith reboot of Cannonball Run would be awesome!
 
2012-12-31 01:57:56 PM  

Wadded Beef: Clerks was okay but Clerks 2 was superfail. I love his speaking engagements, though, as he's a terrific orator. Just hearing the story of his attempts to get Superman remade and the morons he dealt with is worth it alone.


Two words: "Interspecies erotica"
 
2012-12-31 02:01:21 PM  

The Downfall: Wadded Beef: Clerks was okay but Clerks 2 was superfail. I love his speaking engagements, though, as he's a terrific orator. Just hearing the story of his attempts to get Superman remade and the morons he dealt with is worth it alone.

Two words: "Interspecies erotica"


Two more: Pickle Farker
 
2012-12-31 02:04:32 PM  

Disgruntled Goat: He also said "Red State" was his last movie.


No, he didn't. That phrase was never spoken by him in the history of ever.
 
2012-12-31 02:09:13 PM  
I'd see it...I'm not sure what they can do with the characters....and I don't know why Kevin Smith keeps saying he'll stop making movies.  I'm guessing he keeps saying that because I don't think he wants to direct other people's material (unless they give him a comic book superhero...which I don't think he can do as he tends to be rather static with the camera and dialogue-focused).

Hate all you want, but he delivers his movies on time and within budget.  Almost ALL of his movies are profitable.

Clerks - Loved it
Mallrats - It was ok
Chasing Amy - loved it until the end
Dogma - liked it alot
Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back - didn't care for it
Clerks 2 - Loved it.  On it's own it would have sucked, but inside the framework of the characters, it was great.  In other words, it wouldn't stand up on its own.
Zach and Miri - enjoyed it
Red State - Loved it.

Didn't see Cop Out or Jersey Girl.
 
2012-12-31 02:20:14 PM  
Subby is full of FAIL
 
2012-12-31 02:25:48 PM  

ecl: Red state was worse than a Sci-Fi movie.


Yup, it was god awful, outside John Goodman's performance.  So ham handed, unrealistic behavior on the part of the feds, and Smith writes himself into a corner and solves it by cutting out the end of the movie and replacing it with a long winded recap of some Deus Ex Machina nonsense.
 
2012-12-31 02:29:48 PM  
I liked Clerks 2. Not as much as Clerks, but enough to want to see Clerks 3.
 
2012-12-31 02:36:13 PM  
Subby sucks donkey dick
 
2012-12-31 02:41:33 PM  
Kevin Smith says that "Clerks 3" will be his last effort as a director. That is if you count "Clerks" and "Clerks 2" as efforts

His film efforts are better than your headline efforts, subby.

Think on that.
 
2012-12-31 02:55:25 PM  

GlobalStrategic MapleSyrup Reserve: Comic Book Men is a great show.


That dude that looks like the love child of Gandalf and Alan Moore is a major douchebag though.

I thought Kevin said his last movie was going to be a hockey-based comedy called "Hit Something"?
 
2012-12-31 02:59:52 PM  

LouDobbsAwaaaay: theurge14: Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back is unwatchable

THIS. I haven't watched anything he's done since that turd hit the theater. He should reimburse anyone who paid to see that thing.


vincentknight.files.wordpress.com

4.bp.blogspot.com
www.hotflick.net

www.filmcritic.com
 
2012-12-31 03:01:57 PM  
I liked Clerks 1 & 2, Dogma and Zack & Miri.

Never saw Chasing Amy, Cop Out or Jersey Girl

Didn't like Mallrats, Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back, or Red State.

Would love to see a Zack & Miri spin-off with the gay couple that makes porn.
 
2012-12-31 03:10:28 PM  

ShawnDoc: ecl: Red state was worse than a Sci-Fi movie.

Yup, it was god awful, outside John Goodman's performance.  So ham handed, unrealistic behavior on the part of the feds, and Smith writes himself into a corner and solves it by cutting out the end of the movie and replacing it with a long winded recap of some Deus Ex Machina nonsense.


I heard that the original ending had the Rapture actually happening. Angels would swoop in with swords and slaughter everyone except John Goodman's character, and then the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse show up.
 
2012-12-31 03:17:10 PM  
Best possible direction for Clerks 3 that would make boatloads of money but will never happen:

Clerks: The Animated Series: The Movie
 
2012-12-31 03:20:35 PM  
I'm 43 and J&SBSB is, to me, a classic comedy. It's on permenent rotation with Blazing Saddles, SpaceBalls, SuperTroopers, Beerfest, etc.


Get them to space, damnit Kevin!
 
2012-12-31 03:22:27 PM  
Clerks II, for all its faults, was a good bookend to the series.  I'm not really sure what the point of Clerks III is.
 
2012-12-31 03:24:18 PM  
I liked Kevin Smith's first five flicks (Clerks, Mallrats, Chasing Amy, Dogman, Jay and Bob). Why is everyone shiatting on Jay and Bob? Sure, it requires you to have seen 4 other movies before it, and he reused the monkey subplot from one of his comics, but it was still enjoyable. Is it because it's the most popular of the original five?

Then dude did the "I wanna make real movies, not just dick and fart joke movies" bit and made Jersey Girl. Okay, it was mediocre sure..but hey, it was his first go at making a real movie. Maybe the next one will be better? Nope! When Jersey Girl failed...right back to the well with Clerks 2. And Clerks 2 wasn't bad, always yay for Randal, but still. The first thing you do after your attempt at making a "real movie" bombs is go back to the well with a sequel to Clerks? You hack.

Then Zack and Miri Make a Porno, which sucked. Then..someone hired him to just direct something? Kevin Smith? You know, the guy who 90% of his films are two people standing in a static frame, talking. And they hired him to direct someone else's movie. Wow. Then Red State, which is almost unwatchable.

Geez. They shoulda let him do Fletch Won 10 years ago. I dunno, I'll see Clerks 3..it just pisses me off that Kevin Smith did a good job making his goofy little universe, turned away from it when he tried to grow up..and when that failed he continues to go back to the View Askewniverse occasionally like a drunken booty-call. Sheesh, I guess it wasn't good enough to make modestly successful dick and fart joke movies and just have that.

Also, as a random aside, I really Chasing Amy..but something never really sat well with me on that flick. The whole central conflict was "dude was bothered that his girlfriend used to be a whore". I've known plenty of whores and plenty of people (chicks and dudes) who've dated whores..and they all got over everything pretty quickly. I dunno, I know ya gotta have drama to have a story..it just seemed really forced and amazingly immature as a plot device.

/And the worst part? The Clerks cartoon was prolly the best stuff he did, and it only got 6 episodes.
 
2012-12-31 03:38:04 PM  

FuryOfFirestorm: GlobalStrategic MapleSyrup Reserve: Comic Book Men is a great show.

That dude that looks like the love child of Gandalf and Alan Moore is a major douchebag though.

I thought Kevin said his last movie was going to be a hockey-based comedy called "Hit Something"?


He looks just about dead on like a rougher-living Alan Moore. Next to Walt I actually find him the funniest person on that show though.
He's clearly a major arse and dickish to everyone but what makes it great for me is apparently he isn't even a store employee. The guy with his attitude who frequents a comic store he doesn't work for but still taking the time to lounge near/behind the desk and snark at everyone is sort of an essential comic store character. Reminds me of the cleaned up for TV version of the guy who used to hastle me for buying Xenozoic Tales when I was younger.

He also claimed to have the high score on all the arcade machines. The high score was always tity/titty so I'd believe it.
 
2012-12-31 03:45:52 PM  

nakedcritic: WhippingBoy: Carth: What was the last good comedy Kevin Smith made? Dogma?

Gigli.

0/10.

dwade: What about that hockey movie he was making? Wasn't that suppose to be the last?

FTFA - Smith's announcement follows the news that his hockey flick "Hit Somebody" will now be turned into a six-part miniseries on an unannounced network.

I guess I'm one of the few that genuinely enjoyed Clerks 2. I get accused of being a huge Smith apologist, but I'm not - the stuff I like I love, and the stuff I don't I despise.

Clerks - loved it. Still love it.
Mallrata - hated it.
Chasing Amy - one of my all-time favorite movies.
Dogma - LOVED the script (it leaked online a year before the movie came out). Did not care for the finished product. Chris Rock may be the most talented living comedian out there, but MAN he's just not a strong actor. With better performances Dogma could have been his greatest film.
Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back - didn't care for it. For me it felt like a big ol' "Thanks" to his die-hard fans. Which is fine. And it had it's moments, but overall it just didn't work for me.
Jersey Girl - A nice little picture. I honestly don't understand the hate. Maybe it's because the huge fans wanted Jay & Silent Bob. Maybe it's because of the Bennifer backlash (which seems so quaint now). But it's a sweet little flick about a guy trying to juggle fatherhood and career ambition.
Clerks 2 - I liked it a lot. Very funny and very sweet.
Zack and Miri - I wanted to love it. I really did. But I couldn't. With that cast, the standout shouldn't be Craig Robinson. It had all the ingredients of a great comedy, but it never really came together for me. (Bonus point added for Traci Lords)
Cop Out - Wow. Just wow. One of the very worst movies I've ever seen. Although to be fair, after hearing Smith's comments about it, it was doomed from the start. It sounds like trying to direct Bruce Willis in a movie he doesn't want to make is like trying to push a car uphill with a rope.
Red State ...


Yeah I am with you there, but I really enjoyed Mallrats a lot. I think it was probably as a kid growing up you only had the mall to go to do social things besides school. However I think the problem with Zack and Miri was the ending for me. Like they just put together an ending, because they needed an ending that was happy or something. Also I thought Kevin Smith was finally going into the right direction as a director based on Red State. I hope he continues to do movies, because I think his best has yet to come. Plus I really want him to cast Kevin Conroy in one of his movies, like he said he would in his Batman podcast.
 
2012-12-31 03:47:02 PM  

RevRaven: The Clerks cartoon was prolly the best stuff he did, and it only got 6 episodes.



OH MY GOD BEAR IS DRIVING HOW CAN THAT BE?

/someone referenced that on Fark last week
 
2012-12-31 04:20:10 PM  

RevRaven: Also, as a random aside, I really Chasing Amy..but something never really sat well with me on that flick. The whole central conflict was "dude was bothered that his girlfriend used to be a whore". I've known plenty of whores and plenty of people (chicks and dudes) who've dated whores..and they all got over everything pretty quickly. I dunno, I know ya gotta have drama to have a story..it just seemed really forced and amazingly immature as a plot device.



I seem to remember him talking about it at one point saying that he used a semi-autobiographical point in his life as the basis of that conflict, and admitted to the fact that it was really immature of him at the time to have that conflict.

I get what your saying though, and I've also known people who dated whores (or former whores if you will) and couldn't get over it. So I think it goes both ways. Bottom line is it wasn't an unrealistic plotline... you know, other than a Lesbo switching teams just cause she hadn't found the right guy yet.
 
2012-12-31 04:22:37 PM  
I enjoyed (to varying degrees) every film he made the first time I watched it. Subsequent attempts at watching any one of them has resulted in me turning it off or walking away about 15 minutes in.

I guess I always look forward to whatever he shiats out and then just accept whatever amount of enjoyment I may get out of it. It's a lot of work for him to be asking for lots of retakes being such a fat fark and all.
 
2012-12-31 04:24:42 PM  

FuryOfFirestorm: I thought Kevin said his last movie was going to be a hockey-based comedy called "Hit Something"?


Basically, he wanted to do it as two movies to cover Buddy's (the main character) entire life. Then he sent part 1 it to Jerry Bruckheimer for notes, and Bruckheimer told him about a hockey movie that he's been trying to get off the ground for years, but nobody wants to back it. Smith figured, "If one of the most powerful men in the industry can't get one hockey movie made, how the fark am I going to get two done," and he started trying to combine them into one movie. He started cutting so much stuff that it started to feel too disjointed, so he put it aside to figure out what to do with it. Jason Mewes, of all people, suggested pitching it as a miniseries to one of the cable networks (probably AMC), that way he has plenty of time for it to play out. He did and it's now a go as a miniseries. In the meantime, he felt that he wanted his last directorial credit to be a theatrical film and he'd always said that if there was one movie that he'd break retirement for, it's Clerks 3, so here we are.

There's also a lot of misreporting on this (he gets a lot of shiat 'round these parts, but he's right and a lot of this thread proves it: people jump to their own conclusions and assumptions and misquote or misrepresent what he says, then chastise him when they don't pan out), mostly from people focusing on one tweet instead of the string. He told the whole story on a Hollywood Babble-On episode a week or two back and it's a lot more complicated than, "Hey, we're making Clerks 3!" Give it a listen.
 
2012-12-31 04:25:48 PM  

RevRaven: Also, as a random aside, I really Chasing Amy..but something never really sat well with me on that flick. The whole central conflict was "dude was bothered that his girlfriend used to be a whore". I've known plenty of whores and plenty of people (chicks and dudes) who've dated whores..and they all got over everything pretty quickly. I dunno, I know ya gotta have drama to have a story..it just seemed really forced and amazingly immature as a plot device.


The only thing that really didn't sit right with me was the part with Banky and his girlfriend at the end where he's telling them his solution to their problem. That just came from out of nowhere and used crazed logic that wouldn't even make sense to a meth head. I can get that he was bothered, the folks in the movie were in their 20's and many folks at that age haven't figured out how trivial stuff like that is in life.
 
2012-12-31 04:36:09 PM  
did i really see Vulgar the Clown or did i hallucinate that?
 
2012-12-31 04:36:10 PM  

Wulfman: RevRaven: The Clerks cartoon was prolly the best stuff he did, and it only got 6 episodes.

OH MY GOD BEAR IS DRIVING HOW CAN THAT BE?

/someone referenced that on Fark last week


Everyone was confused as hell when I heard that Bea Arthur died.

"SIC SEMPER BEA ARTHUR!"
 
2012-12-31 04:36:44 PM  

BigMevy: you know, other than a Lesbo switching teams just cause she hadn't found the right guy yet.


You missed the whole point if you thought that's what it was saying. She even flat-out states it in the movie: she's into whoever she's into, regardless of gender. Everyone tried to make it an absolute, you're either gay or straight, but she just loves who she loves and saying, "I'm only ever going to be with men," or, "I'm only ever going to be with women," is artificially cutting yourself off from the possibility of finding your true love. She never "switched sides" because she was never committed to one.
 
2012-12-31 04:39:57 PM  
Screw movies, his stand up is way more interesting.
That being said, where is he going to get his material from without being a producer?
 
2012-12-31 04:40:55 PM  
So is this like when he said he wouldn't make any more Jay and Silent Bob Movies?
 
2012-12-31 04:43:28 PM  

Jizz Master Zero: BigMevy: you know, other than a Lesbo switching teams just cause she hadn't found the right guy yet.

You missed the whole point if you thought that's what it was saying. She even flat-out states it in the movie: she's into whoever she's into, regardless of gender. Everyone tried to make it an absolute, you're either gay or straight, but she just loves who she loves and saying, "I'm only ever going to be with men," or, "I'm only ever going to be with women," is artificially cutting yourself off from the possibility of finding your true love. She never "switched sides" because she was never committed to one.


Thing is she was committed to one side for a while until she reexamined her reasons for not dating the guy. She even said so in her little speech to him when he asked her why him.
 
2012-12-31 04:53:28 PM  
IMO, if he wanted to do Clerks 3 justice he would have Dante and Randall go through the part that a lot of people go through life where they start wondering if they need/have to act or be a certain way now that they are "grown" up. I doubt everyone who plays golf on the weekends does it because they have a burning desire to.
 
2012-12-31 05:01:45 PM  
He's made a few good flicks but there are not a whole lot of movies I've disliked as much as I did Chasing Amy...
 
2012-12-31 06:00:54 PM  
Hit Somebody will be a cake miniseries.

Clerks was about his twenties. Clerks 2 was about his thirties. Clerks 3 will be about his forties.

/not Kevin Smith
//Jizz Master Zero might be though
 
2012-12-31 06:21:14 PM  
Clerks - Haven't seen
Mallrats - Entertaining, but not worth watching again
Chasing Amy - only saw the end, which blew
Dogma - Matt and Ben were entertaining, Alan Rickman was Alan Rickman, nothing else worked
Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back - loads of fun
Clerks 2 - Only seen bits and pieces, like the rant about the "trilogy" which is dead on
Zach and Miri - skipped
Red State - have never had the chance
Cop Out or Jersey Girl - skipped em both
Clerks animated - funny
Kevin Smith's talks on youtube - awesome, finally a comic book geek that I see eye to eye with
 
2012-12-31 06:23:17 PM  

theflatline: Clerks 2 and Strikes back were Smith,Affleck, etc versions of Cannonball Run 1,2.

Just some guys having a good time.

And you cannot beat female logic as exposed in Clerks. 37


37? In a row?
 
2012-12-31 06:30:14 PM  

lasercannon: LouDobbsAwaaaay: theurge14: Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back is unwatchable

THIS. I haven't watched anything he's done since that turd hit the theater. He should reimburse anyone who paid to see that thing.

[vincentknight.files.wordpress.com image 400x266]

[4.bp.blogspot.com image 850x478]
[www.hotflick.net image 850x478]

[www.filmcritic.com image 560x392]


Wonder if any of his entourage had the nerve to tell him that his wife/gf looked like a troll grouped in with the three uber-hotties.
 
2012-12-31 06:32:18 PM  
Loved Clerks, Mallrats, Chasing Amy, Dogma, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, Clerks 2, Zach and Miri make a Porno...

Liked Jersey Girl

Was 'meh' about Cop Out

Hated Red State
 
2012-12-31 06:42:15 PM  
He says every movie he makes will be his last.
 
2012-12-31 06:48:59 PM  
He has a rabid fanbase with no discerning taste whatsoever and he makes these movies cheaply. He can do this as long as he wants.
 
2012-12-31 06:50:37 PM  

STRYPERSWINE: Hit Somebody will be a cake miniseries.


Cable miniseries
FIFM
 
2012-12-31 07:07:36 PM  

AaronSynn: lasercannon: LouDobbsAwaaaay: theurge14: Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back is unwatchable

THIS. I haven't watched anything he's done since that turd hit the theater. He should reimburse anyone who paid to see that thing.

[vincentknight.files.wordpress.com image 400x266]

[4.bp.blogspot.com image 850x478]
[www.hotflick.net image 850x478]

[www.filmcritic.com image 560x392]

Wonder if any of his entourage had the nerve to tell him that his wife/gf looked like a troll grouped in with the three uber-hotties.


She certainly wasn't the cute one there. How could you tell your friend that his wife is too homely to be wit ha group of hot women.
 
2012-12-31 07:24:21 PM  

AaronSynn: Wonder if any of his entourage had the nerve to tell him that his wife/gf looked like a troll grouped in with the three uber-hotties.


This. It's not a sharp knees thing either. It's like if you have Bill Gates, Zuckerberg, Jobs (pre-death), and a millionaire together in a picture. They're all rich, but one of them doesn't belong with the others.

//Which one of these doesn't belong, which one of this ain't like the others?
 
2012-12-31 07:28:35 PM  
Guy's he only making a movie not asking you to marry him
 
2012-12-31 07:36:57 PM  

Carth: What was the last good comedy Kevin Smith made? Dogma?


Mallrats for me, though I do like Dogma.
 
2012-12-31 07:41:07 PM  
But he isn't even supposed to be here today...
 
2012-12-31 07:47:27 PM  

Kanemano: Guy's he only making a movie not asking you to marry him


I'm OK with the former, and I'm crossing my fingers for the latter.
 
2012-12-31 07:59:22 PM  

titwrench: Rosario Dawson dancing on the roof begs to differ.

/Porch monkey for life


Now with helpful visual aide:
imageshack.us
 
2012-12-31 08:11:25 PM  

Carth: What was the last good comedy Kevin Smith made? Dogma?


Chasing Amy
 
2012-12-31 08:14:15 PM  
I like all his movies. I like them to different degrees, but I like them all. Why? Because fark you, that's why.

/applesauce, biatch
 
2012-12-31 09:27:34 PM  

SuperSecretSquirrel: 0/10


Either that or Subby is a cinema retard... Could be the real deal.
 
2012-12-31 09:30:04 PM  

momentous: Vulgar


Was wondering if someone would mention that. Granted he was only the 'executive producer' but my god, if there's a movie you'd want to erase your name from...

and it got 5.0/10 on IMDB, which has me worrying about some of the people on IMDB.

can't imagine what Clerks 3 would be about, and not sure I care. All the good lines he could ever write are probably already on film/video.

/Chasing Amy: "what she needs... is some serious deep dicking"
 
2012-12-31 09:46:25 PM  
He sounds fat.
 
2012-12-31 10:00:48 PM  
Clerks-Loved it
Mallrats-Liked it a lot
Chasing Amy-Liked the story fine Affleck and Adams weren't the right actors to me
Dogma-Loved it
Jay and Bob-It's grown on me some Hammil at the end my favorite part
Cop Out-Abortion
Zack and Miri-Meh
Clerks 2-Meh except for the aformentioned Dawson scene on the roof
Red State-Liked it a lot. For a comedic director stretching to a different genre it wasn't bad and some of the performances were really good.
 
2012-12-31 10:06:54 PM  

shoegaze99: Yeah, I like Kevin Smith the dude far more than I do his work.


I soured on Kevin Smith after the airplane incident.It was bad enough that he didn't purchase a second seat but then putting out podcast after podcast about how evil the airline was instead of taking responsibility for his physical condition was a textbook case of the type of self absorbed entitlement that only comes from living a life surrounded by suck ups.
 
2012-12-31 10:11:09 PM  

Jizz Master Zero: BigMevy: you know, other than a Lesbo switching teams just cause she hadn't found the right guy yet.

You missed the whole point if you thought that's what it was saying. She even flat-out states it in the movie: she's into whoever she's into, regardless of gender. Everyone tried to make it an absolute, you're either gay or straight, but she just loves who she loves and saying, "I'm only ever going to be with men," or, "I'm only ever going to be with women," is artificially cutting yourself off from the possibility of finding your true love. She never "switched sides" because she was never committed to one.


No, I get it. And I know what she said trying to justify it, but apparently everyone in the movie thought she was committed to being a lesbian, including her which she did say herself earlier in the movie. The fact that she suddenly changed her mind and then the rationale was that she loves who she loves and was never committed was a plot hole. Just because it's weakly justified later doesn't make it true, just means it was glossed over.

Don't get me wrong, I still really liked the movie. And it actually stands up over time, unlike Mallrats which I loved when it came out but I can barely tolerate fast-forwarding through now. (Mainly to see Joey Adams topless in the dressing room).
 
2012-12-31 10:11:49 PM  

RevRaven: And the worst part? The Clerks cartoon was prolly the best stuff he did, and it only got 6 episodes.


I thought the best thing he ever wrote at least was the multi-part blog entry he did where he told the story of his friendship with Jason Mewes and the problems with drug addiction that Mewes has had over the years. It was actually something that was serious and meaningful.

I think like others have mentioned I am in the same boat where I loved Smith's movies when I was in my 20's. When I was in University my friend had a TV, and no cable but he owned like 5 movies. Two of those were Chasing Amy and Mallrats, and I think we watched each of those movies like once a week. Later on when we were working we did a road trip to NYC. Even though it was like an 8 hour drive we still took an extra hour and stayed a day in New Jersey and checked out the Quikstop and the Comic Store.

But now that I am in my 30's my life has changed so much. I have different priorities and I find different things funny. Yet his life, his writing style and his humour is exactly the same.
 
2012-12-31 11:21:27 PM  
I had no idea hating on Kevin Smith was the hipster thing to do.

So yeah, fark you subs.
 
2013-01-01 12:30:01 AM  

EngineerAU: shoegaze99: Yeah, I like Kevin Smith the dude far more than I do his work.

I soured on Kevin Smith after the airplane incident.It was bad enough that he didn't purchase a second seat but then putting out podcast after podcast about how evil the airline was instead of taking responsibility for his physical condition was a textbook case of the type of self absorbed entitlement that only comes from living a life surrounded by suck ups.


2/10
 
2013-01-01 01:41:56 AM  

Your Average Witty Fark User: I had no idea hating on Kevin Smith was the hipster thing to do.

So yeah, fark you subs.


Kevin Smith, Olive Garden, Dave Barry, children, Lady Gaga, and The Dark Knight.
 
2013-01-01 02:14:08 AM  
Kevin Smith is a director?

I thought he was a morbidly obese amateur blogger who made some crappy films for hollywood?

boy, I guess anyone can make crap and call themselves a director...

so what does that make David Lean and Stanley Kubrick then?
 
2013-01-01 02:18:53 AM  

momentous: did i really see Vulgar the Clown or did i hallucinate that?


I also tried to scrub that from my memory. What an insanely disturbing movie.

/no one likes clown rape
 
2013-01-01 02:21:14 AM  

Haliburton Cummings: Kevin Smith is a director?

I thought he was a morbidly obese amateur blogger who made some crappy films for hollywood?

boy, I guess anyone can make crap and call themselves a director...

so what does that make David Lean and Stanley Kubrick then?


Overrated.
 
2013-01-01 03:10:23 AM  

Spaced Lion: Best possible direction for Clerks 3 that would make boatloads of money but will never happen:

Clerks: The Animated Series: The Movie


They actually were working on this at one point and I was so hoping they would finish it. The commentaries on those DVDs are awesome too.
 
2013-01-01 04:06:54 AM  
"Goon" just came out and was pretty alright, and now Kevin's doing the same type movie? Reminds me of this scene from Chasing Amy:

COLLECTOR: Hey man. If somebody draws something and then you draw the same thing right on top of it, not going out-side the designated original art what do call that!

LITTLE KID (shrugs):I don't know. Tracing?

COLLECTOR (to Banky): See?

BANKY: It's not tracing
.
COLLECTOR: Oh, but it is.

And this shiat of him "choosing" to go with a mini-series instead of a movie? It's called "direct to cable", Kevin... quit trying to 'church it up'. Might be the only profit it sees outside of the $5 bin at Wal-Mart and the 'undisclosed network' is probably staying undisclosed because they are waiting on the final cut to determine if they are going to a) admit to their viewing audience that they will air it on their network or b) swap another network the finished movie mini-series in exchange for a couple of aging porn fluffers and a used clapboard or something.
 
2013-01-01 06:20:09 AM  

StrikitRich: In Clerks a gal humped a dead guy in the bathroom. In Clerks II a guy humped a donkey. So, with necrophilia and zoophilia covered, what's left, voyeurism or fetishism?

Wonder what kind of humping furry Jay or Dante would be.


Back titty phuqing your mom?
 
2013-01-01 09:01:13 AM  

mechgreg: RevRaven: And the worst part? The Clerks cartoon was prolly the best stuff he did, and it only got 6 episodes.

I thought the best thing he ever wrote at least was the multi-part blog entry he did where he told the story of his friendship with Jason Mewes and the problems with drug addiction that Mewes has had over the years. It was actually something that was serious and meaningful.


And then he became a stoner and I lost all respect for him.
 
2013-01-01 10:53:05 AM  
pssst....


Cop Out wasn't a "Kevin Smith" movie....

....it was a film he directed but didn't write....
 
2013-01-01 10:53:58 AM  
I will see Clerks 3 and I am sure I will enjoy it. I like Kevin Smith a lot and I'm a big fan of his podcasts.
 
2013-01-01 11:11:44 AM  
Eh, I liked Clerks 2, but I'm not sure where they would go with a 3rd part. Clerks 2 was very much about Kevin reflecting on how his career really hasn't gone anywhere. He attempted to make a Real Movie, only to not succeed (for what it's worth, I don't think Jersey Girl is bad... it's just not all that good.) and basically going back to exactly where he started while some of his peers went onto better things. I guess it's a bit FWP-ish when put in that context, but I can overlook it because I enjoyed the movie otherwise.


nakedcritic: The only part I didn't care for was Goodman's recap of the events at the end - which I have heard some Smith non-fans say was their FAVORITE part. Go figure.


how odd considering that was the most Kevin Smith-ish part of the movie. I think Red State had good pieces, but not really all that good as a whole.
 
2013-01-01 12:12:39 PM  
My love for you is like a truck

BERZERKER!

Would you like to be making fu---

What happened to that guy?

\Drawing Flies...
 
2013-01-01 12:26:49 PM  

TheCenturion: And then he became a stoner and I lost all respect for him.


Became?
 
2013-01-01 01:14:19 PM  

Dingleberry Dickwad: Haliburton Cummings: Kevin Smith is a director?

I thought he was a morbidly obese amateur blogger who made some crappy films for hollywood?

boy, I guess anyone can make crap and call themselves a director...

so what does that make David Lean and Stanley Kubrick then?

Overrated.


0/10

Kevin Smith makes crap.
 
2013-01-01 04:33:34 PM  
It'd be better if he just brought the cartoon back.
 
2013-01-01 04:51:56 PM  

Biledriver: It'd be better if he just brought the cartoon back.


Jay & Silent Bob's Super Groovy Cartoon Movie coming out in 2013.
 
2013-01-01 09:22:32 PM  

mjbok: TheCenturion: And then he became a stoner and I lost all respect for him.

Became?


Yes became. He's very upfront about it. He never smoked pot until after filming on Zack and Miri wrapped he smoked up with Rogen and liked it.
 
2013-01-02 10:59:25 AM  
But... Marihuana is illegal. And he is a pillar of society, a paragon of moral uprightness...
 
2013-01-02 11:43:52 AM  
Holy shiat, there is more misinformation and smearing in this thread than in the Politics tab.

silentbobspeaks.com
 
2013-01-03 11:34:29 PM  
Give me the rooftop dance, with the wardrobe from Alexander's bedroom scene, and I'll watch it.

Also, since Clerks 2, I haven't been able to listen to the Jackson 5's "ABC" without getting a smile on my face.
 
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