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(Daily Mail)   Russian woman who has come back from the dead not once but twice just wants to relax, eat BRAAIINS   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 40
    More: Strange, BRAAIINS, morgues, Russians, grandmother  
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7539 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Dec 2012 at 10:08 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-29 09:02:28 PM
I bet she is a party favorite around Easter.
 
2012-12-29 09:55:36 PM
Someone found rasputin's book of party tricks.
 
2012-12-29 10:09:29 PM
If you come back from the dead more than once, you should be preemptively shot in the head just for safety's sake.

Sorry. You can never be too careful.
 
2012-12-29 10:16:47 PM
I'm pretty sure that I've been "legally dead" from drinking vodka more than twice.
 
2012-12-29 10:17:57 PM
Anastasia is a rough 29

Babushka bomb is a biatch
 
2012-12-29 10:18:50 PM
Weekend at Lyudmila's!
 
2012-12-29 10:22:58 PM
She's got one up on Jesus but can she turn water in to vodka?
 
2012-12-29 10:27:20 PM
www.imaginesciencefilms.org
 
2012-12-29 10:32:50 PM
FTFA: And in April a 95-year-old Chinese woman climbed out of her own coffin six days after she was declared dead following a fall.
Under Chinese tradition, Li Xiufeng was placed in a coffin kept in her house so friends and relatives could pay their respects. But the day before the funeral, neighbours found an empty coffin and later discovered her in the kitchen cooking.


There was a scene like that in the Japanese movie Tampopo
 
2012-12-29 10:44:21 PM
In Russia, death cheats you!
 
2012-12-29 10:46:28 PM
Now let's nail her to a piece of wood and see what happens.
 
2012-12-29 10:50:06 PM
For some reason, I'm reminded of this:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Subject_Two
 
2012-12-29 10:52:22 PM
Well why didn't she just stay dead then?
 
2012-12-29 10:55:35 PM
The damn cart man is going to be furious about this one.
 
2012-12-29 10:55:48 PM

occamswrist: Now let's nail her to a piece of wood and see what happens.


I tried suicide by that method once. You'd need a miracle to hammer in that other nail.
 
2012-12-29 10:56:07 PM
images.rottentomatoes.com

approves.
 
2012-12-29 10:58:20 PM

thisisyourbrainonFark: [www.imaginesciencefilms.org image 620x349]


One thing about living in Russia I never could stomach, all the damn zombie grandmothers.

/Yes, I know it's a different movie.
//They both have Kiefer Sutherland , though.
 
2012-12-29 10:58:55 PM
No one has come back from the dead.
 
2012-12-29 11:06:13 PM

ArcadianRefugee: No one has come back from the dead.


Life pervades the universe and organizes itself to create higher order sentience.

Life doesn't die, it only organizes and dissassociates itself.

This may be the jaegerbombs talking...
 
2012-12-29 11:09:31 PM
ecx.images-amazon.com
 
2012-12-29 11:11:17 PM

jtown:


You only live thrice.
 
2012-12-29 11:15:54 PM

AssAsInAssassin: For some reason, I'm reminded of this:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Subject_Two


Ooh, I may just have to rent that one.

And now this comes to mind: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Autopsy_Room_Four
 
2012-12-29 11:15:59 PM

jtown: [ecx.images-amazon.com image 300x300]


Thread.
 
2012-12-29 11:18:49 PM
So, she found a couple of those green 1up mushrooms?
 
2012-12-29 11:30:54 PM
The last time they brought me back I was depressed for six months afterward. I'm thinking of having DO NOT RESUSCITATE tattooed all over my torso in every language Google can translate.
 
2012-12-29 11:32:27 PM

Great Janitor: So, she found a couple of those green 1up mushrooms?


Yeah I bet she figured out how to time jumping on the turtle coming down the stairs so she'd have 99 lives.
 
2012-12-29 11:33:41 PM

The One True TheDavid: The last time they brought me back I was depressed for six months afterward. I'm thinking of having DO NOT RESUSCITATE tattooed all over my torso in every language Google can translate.


Just make sure Google doesn't come back with a 404 error. It would suck to have that tattooed on you.
 
2012-12-30 12:08:14 AM
Krokodil is a biatch.
 
2012-12-30 12:14:40 AM
Some people are really deep sleepers.
 
2012-12-30 12:52:39 AM

occamswrist: ArcadianRefugee: No one has come back from the dead.

Life pervades the universe and organizes itself to create higher order sentience.

Life doesn't die, it only organizes and dissassociates itself.

This may be the jaegerbombs talking...


Don't fark with me, man. I just watched all of Babylon 5 again, and you're sounding awfully Minbari.
 
2012-12-30 01:22:54 AM

Gyrfalcon: If you come back from the dead more than once, you should be preemptively shot in the head just for safety's sake.


Rule #2: Double Tap
 
2012-12-30 03:22:49 AM

ArcadianRefugee: No one has come back from the dead.


After the heart and brain activity stop, and all legal definitions of dead are met, most cells and organs in the body are alive for several minutes after that. (this is why organ harvesting works). If you manage to restart the heart the body as a whole may begin to survive on it's own indefinitely again (alive) It's not mystical, it's just true.
 
2012-12-30 03:53:32 AM
My father has been dead four times. First time, he drowned in a pickle vat. Second time was when he dove into an empty swimming pool. Third was a heroin overdose. Fourth was a heart attack from the talcum powder some dick cut some heroin with way back when he did that. That time, my sister found him, and her screaming woke me up. He was blue. They brought him back on the way to the hospital. I'm starting to think the devil owes him money, and just doesn't wanna pay up.
 
2012-12-30 04:59:58 AM

Well Armed Sheep: My father has been dead four times. First time, he drowned in a pickle vat. Second time was when he dove into an empty swimming pool. Third was a heroin overdose. Fourth was a heart attack from the talcum powder some dick cut some heroin with way back when he did that. That time, my sister found him, and her screaming woke me up. He was blue. They brought him back on the way to the hospital. I'm starting to think the devil owes him money, and just doesn't wanna pay up.


to be doing heroin after 2 extra chances at life, that shows that the brain apparently did not make it.
 
2012-12-30 09:02:28 AM
Well this explains a lot. I had no idea this kind of thing could happen.
 
2012-12-30 09:52:22 AM

gravebayne2: Well Armed Sheep:

My father has been dead four times. First time, he drowned in a pickle vat. Second time was when he dove into an empty swimming pool. Third was a heroin overdose. Fourth was a heart attack from the talcum powder some dick cut some heroin with way back when he did that. That time, my sister found him, and her screaming woke me up. He was blue. They brought him back on the way to the hospital. I'm starting to think the devil owes him money, and just doesn't wanna pay up.

to be doing heroin after 2 extra chances at life, that shows that the brain apparently did not make it.


No, man: it shows you're blessed or just plain lucky. That's how most people think, anyway. You can't be saying everybody who believes in God or buys a lottery ticket is stupid, can you?

Besides you sound like someone who's never done heroin. It's easy for me to understand the appeal of that, at least till you have to keep taking it just to keep from getting sick: it's better than sex and lasts a lot longer. It's a great antidepressant too, so much that anybody who can be stoned on smack and still feel blue has a serious mood disorder. Happiness, not a care in the world, all the pain of life goes away; what's not to like? Of course this means it's one drug I should never try a third time, my personal no-no, unless I'm going to die soon anyway. Addiction to an illegal plain white powder some fool can cut with powdered rock has got to suck, even if it is a jones that's not too hard to walk away from if you've got any balls left. ("A bad case of flu?" HA. I survived untreated meningitis in a South of Market SRO.)
 
2012-12-30 02:04:02 PM

Ambivalence: Someone found rasputin's book of party tricks.


Came here for Rasputin, leaving satisfied after 2 comments. Nice.
 
2012-12-30 03:41:45 PM
Dead nothing! you take one nap in a ditch at the park and they start declaring you this and that...
 
2012-12-30 05:48:01 PM
Kenny McCormick not impressed.
 
2012-12-31 02:49:15 AM

The One True TheDavid: Besides you sound like someone who's never done heroin. It's easy for me to understand the appeal of that, at least till you have to keep taking it just to keep from getting sick: it's better than sex and lasts a lot longer. It's a great antidepressant too, so much that anybody who can be stoned on smack and still feel blue has a serious mood disorder. Happiness, not a care in the world, all the pain of life goes away; what's not to like? Of course this means it's one drug I should never try a third time, my personal no-no, unless I'm going to die soon anyway. Addiction to an illegal plain white powder some fool can cut with powdered rock has got to suck, even if it is a jones that's not too hard to walk away from if you've got any balls left. ("A bad case of flu?" HA. I survived untreated meningitis in a South of Market SRO.)


i didn't do heroin. i was addicted to meth. that was bad enough. i'll pass on touching anything that addictive ever again.
 
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