FARK.com: (7509065) Missing cigarettes, a stolen guitar, obscene messages scratched onto a car and a group trip to jail - bad country song or a real Saturday night in a redneck town?

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		Missing cigarettes, a stolen guitar, obscene messages scratched onto a car and a group trip to jail - bad country song or a real Saturday night in a redneck town? (dacula.patch.com)		39
		More: Amusing, Dacula Patch, town, Volkswagen Jetta, Dacula, cigarettes, Kaylee Majka, jail

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3862 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Dec 2012 at 3:26 PM | Favorite | share:

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39 Comments (+0 »)

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Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener		2012-12-29 01:03:41 PM

Give Toby Keith enough time, and it can be *both.*

MaudlinMutantMollusk		2012-12-29 02:45:45 PM

The Curse of Dacula

A Shambling Mound		2012-12-29 03:28:22 PM

Not much of a Saturday night, really. Sounds like a Thursday in Vidor..

tinfoil-hat maggie		2012-12-29 03:32:44 PM

All country songs really happened and well it's a Family tradition : )

Another Government Employee		2012-12-29 03:34:42 PM

Dacula. Everything Florida wants to be and more.

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener		2012-12-29 03:34:54 PM

tinfoil-hat maggie: All country songs really happened and well it's a Family tradition : )

(quietly wonders if I really *am* ready for some football)

Cyno01		2012-12-29 03:44:00 PM

Arent most country songs based on a saturday night in a redneck town?

/no, your tractor is not sexy

dryknife		2012-12-29 03:47:09 PM

It made me feel much betta
To scratch a pecker on your
Pretty new Jetta
You are never ever ever bumming smokes from me again

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener		2012-12-29 03:47:15 PM

Cyno01: Arent most country songs based on a saturday night in a redneck town?

/no, your tractor is not sexy

Heh, not quite! There's a lot of country music I like, and a bit that I don't like.

Generally, the real soulful stuff, the stuff that doesn't sound like a pop track with a twangy guitar? That stuff, I like.

And the old school stuff is pretty damn good, too.

The only kind of music I don't really like across the board is the bubblegum pop stuff from Bieber and others of that ilk.

aenemated		2012-12-29 03:47:29 PM

"jeshua?"

wtf?

Onkel Buck		2012-12-29 03:49:25 PM

I always check to see if the counties these redneck stories happen in are on the police scanner link and I listen. Its like old timey white trash radio theater.

rumpelstiltskin		2012-12-29 03:50:51 PM

In either case, there's a bad woman or a good dog involved.

illannoyin		2012-12-29 03:53:59 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Give Toby Keith enough time, and it can be *both.*

This.

I came in to simply say in reply to the headline "yes".

/Texas
//Six years

skinink		2012-12-29 03:56:43 PM

Why doesn't anyone scratch vaginas into the side of a car? I'd think that kind of car would be more embarrassing to drive around.

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener		2012-12-29 03:59:20 PM

illannoyin: This.

I came in to simply say in reply to the headline "yes".

*fistbump*

Right on, illannoyin.

tinfoil-hat maggie		2012-12-29 04:04:00 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: tinfoil-hat maggie: All country songs really happened and well it's a Family tradition : )

(quietly wonders if I really *am* ready for some football)

Maybe but are you ready for swinging ?
/Wish I could find the original or one as bad as that Final Countdown you love : )

El Freak		2012-12-29 04:04:57 PM

Cyno01: Arent most country songs based on a saturday night in a redneck town?

/no, your tractor is not sexy

Mine is. And by "tractor", I mean my penis.

phalamir		2012-12-29 04:04:57 PM

skinink: Why doesn't anyone scratch vaginas into the side of a car? I'd think that kind of car would be more embarrassing to drive around.

Because the dipshiats that do this have never seen a vagina since their birth; while, like most rednecks, they have had lots of experienc looking at various weeners up close

johnnygew		2012-12-29 04:08:08 PM

dryknife: It made me feel much betta
To scratch a pecker on your
Pretty new Jetta
You are never ever ever bumming smokes from me again

You'll make a muffin betta
Betta
It's really getting betta
It's betta, it's betta
With a green ~~rosetta~~ Jetta

/He was a Very nice boy...He used to Cut my grass...

Pasnute		2012-12-29 04:09:25 PM

FTFA: Dec. 20
Entering auto in the 2500 block of Harbin Springs Cove.

Wut??

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener		2012-12-29 04:13:24 PM

tinfoil-hat maggie: Maybe but are you ready for swinging ?

Right now, I'm trying to drink as much orange juice as I can. It's the season for ramblin' fever, you know.

tinfoil-hat maggie: /Wish I could find the original or one as bad as that Final Countdown you love : )

! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

You know, I actually have something appropriate for the purposes of this thread! :D

tinfoil-hat maggie		2012-12-29 04:37:15 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: tinfoil-hat maggie: Maybe but are you ready for swinging ?

Right now, I'm trying to drink as much orange juice as I can. It's the season for ramblin' fever, you know.

tinfoil-hat maggie: /Wish I could find the original or one as bad as that Final Countdown you love : )

! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

You know, I actually have something appropriate for the purposes of this thread! :D

I love it, now, take another little piece of my heart now baby : )

jmsvrsn		2012-12-29 04:49:27 PM

If your circle of acquaintances include a Jeshua and a Weston you may want to rethink things.

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener		2012-12-29 04:56:10 PM

tinfoil-hat maggie: I love it, now, take another little piece of my heart now baby : )

Word up, yo! :D

cc_rider		2012-12-29 05:02:40 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Give Toby Keith enough time, and it can be *both.*

My first thought was Lucinda Williams. She could definitely pull it off, and the song would actually be worth listening to. ;)

tinfoil-hat maggie		2012-12-29 05:04:55 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: tinfoil-hat maggie: I love it, now, take another little piece of my heart now baby : )

Word up, yo! :D

Heh, you've made my day but, even cowgirls get the blues ; )

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener		2012-12-29 05:12:18 PM

cc_rider: My first thought was Lucinda Williams. She could definitely pull it off, and the song would actually be worth listening to. ;)

Okay, THAT would be interesting.

tinfoil-hat maggie: Heh, you've made my day but, even cowgirls get the blues ; )

Thanks!

Tell ya what, a winter day like this makes me wish that I had a big pot of jambalaya at the ready!

wellreadneck		2012-12-29 05:21:16 PM

tinfoil-hat maggie: All country songs really happened and well it's a Family tradition : )

Some Elizabeth Cook would be appropriate.

tinfoil-hat maggie		2012-12-29 05:26:32 PM

wellreadneck: tinfoil-hat maggie: All country songs really happened and well it's a Family tradition : )

Some Elizabeth Cook would be appropriate.

Well you could've played some ; ) Where'd you come from country bumpkin: )
/LoL ; )

tinfoil-hat maggie		2012-12-29 05:55:51 PM

The lord knows I'm drinking : )

dopekitty74		2012-12-29 05:58:26 PM

Can't believe nobody got the Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back reference out of that (expletive deleted) and made them eat that (expletive deleted) and (expletive deleted) it out again

Badafuco		2012-12-29 06:44:03 PM

Get me out of this small redneck town
Cause I don't wanna be stuck in jail When the sun goes down -
you can't bust me If you don't know what you found

jmadisonbiii		2012-12-29 07:36:35 PM

There's gold in a link at the bottom of that page:

Growling Man Spits on Clerk's Face, Says He'll Be Back
"A witness to the dancing told police the man appeared to be under the influence of drugs. "

StoPPeRmobile		2012-12-29 07:44:47 PM

jmadisonbiii		2012-12-29 07:45:40 PM

Damn. This one's even better:

Father Says He Was Robbed by Naked Man He Found in Room With His 16-Year-Old Daughter

Kenny B		2012-12-29 07:54:23 PM

had stolen some of his cigarettes a few days ago

Buddy of mine used to bum cigs all the time. Broke him from doing it when I gave him one that had been in a pack that was on my dashboard for about a year.

pc		2012-12-29 09:21:22 PM

Home Invaders Flee After Woman Yells at Them
Obscene Gesture Leads to Confrontation in Hamilton Mill
Dacula Man Admits Grabbing Teen by Neck During Dispute at McDonald's
Car Accident Leads to Profane Tantrum in Daycare Parking Lot
Woman Calls Police After Neighbor 'Shot Her the Bird'
Man Charged With Pointing Gun During Road Rage Incident
Woman Hit Over Head With Beer Bottle During Bar Fight
img.photobucket.com

abhorrent1		2012-12-30 05:56:57 AM

What's with that Dacula place? Is that were they make the people they ship to Florida?

offmymeds		2012-12-30 12:07:52 PM

pc: Home Invaders Flee After Woman Yells at Them
Obscene Gesture Leads to Confrontation in Hamilton Mill
Dacula Man Admits Grabbing Teen by Neck During Dispute at McDonald's
Car Accident Leads to Profane Tantrum in Daycare Parking Lot
Woman Calls Police After Neighbor 'Shot Her the Bird'
Man Charged With Pointing Gun During Road Rage Incident
Woman Hit Over Head With Beer Bottle During Bar Fight
[img.photobucket.com image 520x363]

There's no crime like white trash crime! :)

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