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(Futurity)   The Megapiranha is extinct, but will still haunt your dreams   (futurity.org) divider line 70
    More: Scary, Megapiranha, American University in Cairo, scientific reports, Field Museum, Amazon River, predatory fish  
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17653 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Dec 2012 at 4:45 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-29 01:01:12 PM
This Friday on Syfy, 8PM EST.
 
2012-12-29 01:11:00 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: This Friday on Syfy, 8PM EST.


Done in one

/if you hadn't, I was going to
//Megapiranha vs Dinoshark coming soon
 
2012-12-29 01:15:15 PM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Done in one

/if you hadn't, I was going to
//Megapiranha vs Dinoshark coming soon


It was all good until I realized that that's when Syfy has Friday Night Smackdown.

Which doesn't rule out the possibility of Megapiranha showing up there, mind you. They'll just have him feud with Daniel Bryan or something.
 
2012-12-29 01:58:55 PM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: This Friday on Syfy, 8PM EST.

Done in one

/if you hadn't, I was going to
//Megapiranha vs Dinoshark coming soon


In 3-DD
 
2012-12-29 02:22:46 PM

ms_lara_croft: In 3-DD


With Gary Busey!
 
2012-12-29 02:26:45 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: ms_lara_croft: In 3-DD

With Gary Busey!


And a cameo by Lindsay Lohan as the drunk bimbo who gets eaten first

/type casting, I know
 
2012-12-29 02:34:26 PM
Oh for petes sake. It's a bluegill with teeth. Tastes like chicken.
 
2012-12-29 02:34:41 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: ms_lara_croft: In 3-DD

With Gary Busey!


And Stephen Baldwin as a cop!
 
2012-12-29 02:36:21 PM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: ms_lara_croft: In 3-DD

With Gary Busey!

And a cameo by Lindsay Lohan as the drunk bimbo who gets eaten first

/type casting, I know


Nothing's left of her but her breast implants floating on the waves.
 
2012-12-29 02:48:26 PM
Paging Roger Corman ... Roger Corman to the white courtesy phone, please ...
 
2012-12-29 02:53:52 PM
Extinct? That's what they said about the coelacanth, too.
 
2012-12-29 03:09:56 PM

ms_lara_croft: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: ms_lara_croft: In 3-DD

With Gary Busey!

And Stephen Baldwin as a cop!

And

Bruce Boxleitner as his partner!
 
2012-12-29 03:14:04 PM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: And a cameo by Lindsay Lohan as the drunk bimbo who gets eaten first

/type casting, I know


ms_lara_croft: And Stephen Baldwin as a cop!


Therion: Paging Roger Corman ... Roger Corman to the white courtesy phone, please ...


Apos: And Bruce Boxleitner as his partner!


And Ving Rhames in a tender, heartfelt role that will surprise you.
 
2012-12-29 03:21:40 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: MaudlinMutantMollusk: And a cameo by Lindsay Lohan as the drunk bimbo who gets eaten first

/type casting, I know

ms_lara_croft: And Stephen Baldwin as a cop!

Therion: Paging Roger Corman ... Roger Corman to the white courtesy phone, please ...

Apos: And Bruce Boxleitner as his partner!

And Ving Rhames in a tender, heartfelt role that will surprise you.


Even knowing that Baldwin will be the weakest link, I'd watch the hell out of this movie.
 
2012-12-29 03:29:39 PM

Apos: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: MaudlinMutantMollusk: And a cameo by Lindsay Lohan as the drunk bimbo who gets eaten first

/type casting, I know

ms_lara_croft: And Stephen Baldwin as a cop!

Therion: Paging Roger Corman ... Roger Corman to the white courtesy phone, please ...

Apos: And Bruce Boxleitner as his partner!

And Ving Rhames in a tender, heartfelt role that will surprise you.

Even knowing that Baldwin will be the weakest link, I'd watch the hell out of this movie.


I'm not so sure that I'd want to know the person who WOULDN'T watch this movie.
 
2012-12-29 03:31:59 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Apos: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: MaudlinMutantMollusk: And a cameo by Lindsay Lohan as the drunk bimbo who gets eaten first

/type casting, I know

ms_lara_croft: And Stephen Baldwin as a cop!

Therion: Paging Roger Corman ... Roger Corman to the white courtesy phone, please ...

Apos: And Bruce Boxleitner as his partner!

And Ving Rhames in a tender, heartfelt role that will surprise you.

Even knowing that Baldwin will be the weakest link, I'd watch the hell out of this movie.

I'm not so sure that I'd want to know the person who WOULDN'T watch this movie.



*fist bump*
 
2012-12-29 03:33:22 PM
*fistbump*

Right on, brother!
 
2012-12-29 04:52:18 PM
Megapiranha vs Sharktopus: Electric Eel Boogaloo

with Eric Roberts, Stephen Baldwin, and guest star David Morse!


/I would watch this, sadly
 
2012-12-29 04:53:06 PM
FTFA---could have had a bite force anywhere from 280 to 1,070 pounds.

Way to not narrow it down. Sheesh.
 
2012-12-29 04:57:39 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: MaudlinMutantMollusk: And a cameo by Lindsay Lohan as the drunk bimbo who gets eaten first

/type casting, I know

ms_lara_croft: And Stephen Baldwin as a cop!

Therion: Paging Roger Corman ... Roger Corman to the white courtesy phone, please ...

Apos: And Bruce Boxleitner as his partner!

And Ving Rhames in a tender, heartfelt role that will surprise you.


Special Appearance by Martika ('Toy Soldiers') as Aquarium owner.
 
2012-12-29 04:58:37 PM
If it's so tough and all, why's it extinct?

/must have been delicious
 
2012-12-29 05:03:23 PM

Galileo's Daughter: Megapiranha vs Sharktopus: Electric Eel Boogaloo

with Eric Roberts, Stephen Baldwin, and guest star David Morse!


/I would watch this, sadly


Anything with Eric Roberts is worth at least one watch.
 
2012-12-29 05:05:50 PM
Will haunt my dreams? Unless it walks on land and preys on farkers here in Colorado, not likely.

/and yeah, what bilgemaster said
 
2012-12-29 05:06:45 PM
I blame global climate change for this, and many other extinctions.
 
2012-12-29 05:08:00 PM

Apos: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Apos: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: MaudlinMutantMollusk: And a cameo by Lindsay Lohan as the drunk bimbo who gets eaten first

/type casting, I know

ms_lara_croft: And Stephen Baldwin as a cop!

Therion: Paging Roger Corman ... Roger Corman to the white courtesy phone, please ...

Apos: And Bruce Boxleitner as his partner!

And Ving Rhames in a tender, heartfelt role that will surprise you.

Even knowing that Baldwin will be the weakest link, I'd watch the hell out of this movie.

I'm not so sure that I'd want to know the person who WOULDN'T watch this movie.


*fist bump*


I wouldn't watch it because it would be on Syfy Channel, and I don't watch that stuff on general principles.

Call me when the DVD is released.
 
2012-12-29 05:09:16 PM
i.ytimg.com

Doesn't stand a chance against the BetaRazor, though.
 
2012-12-29 05:14:19 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: MaudlinMutantMollusk: Done in one

/if you hadn't, I was going to
//Megapiranha vs Dinoshark coming soon

It was all good until I realized that that's when Syfy has Friday Night Smackdown.

Which doesn't rule out the possibility of Megapiranha showing up there, mind you. They'll just have him feud with Daniel Bryan or something.


BAH GAWD KING! ENOUGH IS ENOUGH! STOP THE DAMN MATCH!
 
2012-12-29 05:17:42 PM
media.giantbomb.com

Bring it on
 
2012-12-29 05:18:58 PM

machoprogrammer: BAH GAWD KING! ENOUGH IS ENOUGH! STOP THE DAMN MATCH!


BAH GAWD, MEGAPIRANHA BROKE THAT MAN IN HALF!

HE'S GOT A FAMILY!


Gyrfalcon: I wouldn't watch it because it would be on Syfy Channel, and I don't watch that stuff on general principles.

Call me when the DVD is released.


It's a tough sell with the cancellation of MST3K, I dig that.


GungFu: Special Appearance by Martika ('Toy Soldiers') as Aquarium owner.


Okay, now THAT'S boss.


Galileo's Daughter: Megapiranha vs Sharktopus: Electric Eel Boogaloo

with Eric Roberts, Stephen Baldwin, and guest star David Morse!


/I would watch this, sadly


There's no "sadly" about this.

I would watch it.

Gladly, even.
 
2012-12-29 05:19:58 PM
Not so tough on land.
 
2012-12-29 05:21:20 PM

Lt. Cheese Weasel: Oh for petes sake. It's a bluegill with teeth. Tastes like chicken.



I hear they're good fried in butter with plantains.
 
2012-12-29 05:29:32 PM

ms_lara_croft: MaudlinMutantMollusk: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: ms_lara_croft: In 3-DD

With Gary Busey!

And a cameo by Lindsay Lohan as the drunk bimbo who gets eaten first

/type casting, I know

Nothing's left of her but her breast implants floating on the waves.


That's hot...
 
2012-12-29 05:29:52 PM

bilgemaster: If it's so tough and all, why's it extinct?

/must have been delicious


Not enough food dumb enough to go into the river it had made its home in.
 
2012-12-29 05:33:03 PM
Dinsdale!

/At a holiday party, a bunch of us started brainstorming SyFy movie ideas and plots. The end result is that I am writing the script for MechaYeti.
//Was drunk at the time.
///Still funny, tho.
 
2012-12-29 05:33:38 PM
I wonder where that fish did go
 
2012-12-29 05:34:24 PM

buzzcut73: I blame global climate change for this, and many other extinctions.


Thank GOD for global climate change!

(Reminds me of that Richard Pryor line.)
 
2012-12-29 05:35:15 PM
atthemovieswithsilver.files.wordpress.com

Still terrified over how horrible the movie was...
 
2012-12-29 05:35:33 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: This Friday on Syfy, 8PM EST.


(Is it wrong that I thought Jersey Shore Shark Attack one of the funniest movies of 2012? So tongue in cheek it was perfect. Yeah. I'll slap myself out.)
 
2012-12-29 05:37:27 PM
www.moviescoremedia.com
 
2012-12-29 05:41:20 PM
i.imgur.com Unimpressed.
 
2012-12-29 05:41:24 PM

Gyrfalcon: I wouldn't watch it because it would be on Syfy Channel, and I don't watch that stuff on general principles.



Ahh, but as you're my favorite Fark MediatorTM, I won't hold that against you.
 
2012-12-29 05:46:59 PM

JosephFinn: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: This Friday on Syfy, 8PM EST.

(Is it wrong that I thought Jersey Shore Shark Attack one of the funniest movies of 2012? So tongue in cheek it was perfect. Yeah. I'll slap myself out.)



After watching for 30 minutes, I switched channels when I realized that neither Tiffany nor Debbie Reynolds were guest stars. Glad you enjoyed it, though.
 
2012-12-29 05:50:02 PM
i wonder what the bite force on the fish that cracks nut or a octopus
 
2012-12-29 05:50:18 PM

sergento: [atthemovieswithsilver.files.wordpress.com image 480x320]

Still terrified over how horrible the movie was...


Yeah, that one sucked. I thought the first one was pretty funny and somewhat entertaining.
 
2012-12-29 05:51:59 PM

John Buck 41: FTFA---could have had a bite force anywhere from 280 to 1,070 pounds.

Way to not narrow it down. Sheesh.


That's what I thought. Is that even useful information? What has happened to science?
 
2012-12-29 05:56:05 PM

LordJiro: [i.imgur.com image 500x356] Unimpressed.


...the f*ck??

People always talk about extinction like it's a bad thing. We should be GLAD these things are gone!
 
2012-12-29 05:59:23 PM
www.gearfuse.com
 
2012-12-29 05:59:24 PM
It's no match for the MANIRANHA!

cdn.shopify.com

/he's a man and a piranha!
//probably obscure
///estoy podcuddle
 
2012-12-29 06:06:05 PM
PIRAN HA! HA!

/I'm using Forbes Insoluble Dry Plates
 
2012-12-29 06:07:46 PM

fusillade762: [www.gearfuse.com image 600x540]


Grizzly[a]conda would rock as would

fc06.deviantart.net
 
2012-12-29 06:08:34 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: MaudlinMutantMollusk: And a cameo by Lindsay Lohan as the drunk bimbo who gets eaten first

/type casting, I know

ms_lara_croft: And Stephen Baldwin as a cop!

Therion: Paging Roger Corman ... Roger Corman to the white courtesy phone, please ...

Apos: And Bruce Boxleitner as his partner!

And Ving Rhames in a tender, heartfelt role that will surprise you.


Also starring Patty Duke as the tough but lovable special education cheerleader.
 
2012-12-29 06:16:50 PM

JosephFinn: (Is it wrong that I thought Jersey Shore Shark Attack one of the funniest movies of 2012? So tongue in cheek it was perfect. Yeah. I'll slap myself out.)


RULING ON THE FIELD IS CONFIRMED

Jersey Shore Shark Attack is funny.

Post results in first down.


Spanky McStupid: Also starring Patty Duke as the tough but lovable special education cheerleader.


Because she has HEART.
 
2012-12-29 06:23:43 PM

sergento: [atthemovieswithsilver.files.wordpress.com image 480x320]

Still terrified over how horrible the movie was...


Just read the Wiki article on that. WTF?
 
2012-12-29 06:23:56 PM
The piranha's nemesis...
img138.imageshack.us
 
2012-12-29 06:38:39 PM

buzzcut73: I blame global climate change for this, and many other extinctions.


I was thinking that with a 5° average temperature increase megafauna might make a comeback.

/short faced bear ftw!
 
2012-12-29 07:35:45 PM
Nah, this one is still alive and it haunts my dreams.

25.media.tumblr.com
 
2012-12-29 07:36:32 PM
And it's a freshwater fish pictured above.
 
2012-12-29 09:55:41 PM
img7.imageshack.usimg90.imageshack.us

Ah yes, The Asylum. Purveyors of fine Syfy films and deceptively-named knockoffs that my local Redbox is stuffed with, like:

Transmorphers
The Da Vinci Treasure
Abraham Lincoln vs. Zombies
AVH: Alien vs. Hunter
The Day the Earth Stopped

But still, it's the Syfy fodder that's memorable.

img198.imageshack.usimg823.imageshack.us
img339.imageshack.us
 
2012-12-29 11:37:34 PM

ms_lara_croft: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: ms_lara_croft: In 3-DD

With Gary Busey!

And Stephen Baldwin as a cop!


ADAM Baldwin, please!
 
2012-12-29 11:42:11 PM

red230: Nah, this one is still alive and it haunts my dreams.


Now imagine it with a foot-long tongue bug.

Hope your medical plan includes psych....
 
2012-12-29 11:44:09 PM

gerbilpox: Ah yes, The Asylum. Purveyors of fine Syfy films and deceptively-named knockoffs that my local Redbox is stuffed with, like:

Transmorphers
The Da Vinci Treasure
Abraham Lincoln vs. Zombies
AVH: Alien vs. Hunter
The Day the Earth Stopped

But still, it's the Syfy fodder that's memorable.


Haha! Robert Ricardo! Carmen Electra! How the mighty have fallen!
 
2012-12-29 11:48:22 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: ms_lara_croft: In 3-DD

With Gary Busey!


The teeth, OH SWEET JEEBUS THE TEETH!
 
2012-12-30 12:42:28 AM
This megapiranha is actually a mid-step between piranha and pacu. There has only been one fossil found of the fish and the teeth are about midway in evolutionary development between those two fish. Pacu eat plants, not other fish. It is far more likely that this 10 million year old piranha ancestor was an herbivore or omnivore that didn't boast any great predatory skills.

However, the goliath tigerfish posted by red320 is the real deal.

This is another picture that isn't quite so distorted by perspective and the wide angle lens. It is found in the Congo river - and knowing this, I never will be.
animal.discovery.com
 
2012-12-30 01:01:28 AM
 Just popped i to say, wow, this thread delivers. However, it lacks the angler fish, which regularly gives me nightmares despite never having seen one in the flesh:

images.nationalgeographic.com

The motherf*cker has a headlightto troll his prey. As horrifying as it is, it's a wonder of evolution.
 
2012-12-30 01:10:38 AM

dickfreckle: Just popped i to say, wow, this thread delivers. However, it lacks the angler fish, which regularly gives me nightmares despite never having seen one in the flesh:

[images.nationalgeographic.com image 600x450]

The motherf*cker has a headlightto troll his prey. As horrifying as it is, it's a wonder of evolution.


The variety in the picture is benthic. You will never see a living one unless you have a $10M submarine. The pelagic ones includes critters like the monkfish which looks like this.
upload.wikimedia.org
 
2012-12-30 01:43:17 AM

madgonad: dickfreckle: Just popped i to say, wow, this thread delivers. However, it lacks the angler fish, which regularly gives me nightmares despite never having seen one in the flesh:

[images.nationalgeographic.com image 600x450]

The motherf*cker has a headlightto troll his prey. As horrifying as it is, it's a wonder of evolution.

The variety in the picture is benthic. You will never see a living one unless you have a $10M submarine. The pelagic ones includes critters like the monkfish which looks like this.
[upload.wikimedia.org image 220x165]


Oh, I had no illusions of ever seeing one in person. I don't have the math on hand, but a man would die long before he got to that asshole fish's territory. Again, though, it's a fascinating fish. Definitely a master troll, Sometimes when I think of the mutations required to grow a farking headlight out your face I am very humbled. Awestruck, even.
 
2012-12-30 02:02:18 AM
MegaShark vs Giant Octopus vs Crocosaurus vs Dinocroc vs Supergator vs Piranhaconda vs Sharktopus vs Mega Python vs Gatoroid vs MegaPiranha vs 2-Headed Shark.

The winner?

images.wikia.com
 
2012-12-30 03:33:17 AM

Keizer_Ghidorah: MegaShark vs Giant Octopus vs Crocosaurus vs Dinocroc vs Supergator vs Piranhaconda vs Sharktopus vs Mega Python vs Gatoroid vs MegaPiranha vs 2-Headed Shark.

The winner?

[images.wikia.com image 598x388]


AAAAAHHHHHH! AAAAAAHHHHH!!!
 
2012-12-30 10:19:21 AM

maltedmothball: The teeth, OH SWEET JEEBUS THE TEETH!


On the piranha or on Gary Busey?
 
2012-12-31 12:35:43 PM
The last time the subject of a Fark post was supposed to haunt my dreams, I think it turned out to be Tila Tequila. I think we all know how that turned out.
 
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